Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1084.

Printer-friendly version
The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1084
by Angharad

Copyright © 2010 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
-Dormouse-001.jpg

“Are you going to help Maria, Mummy?” Trish asked as we drove home.

“If I can–but you know that already. Why did you ask?”

“If she doesn’t want to live at her house any more, she could stay with us.”

“Trish, if we have any more people staying at our house it will look like an evacuation centre for refugees. All we need is for someone to turn up with their goat...”

“It would eat all Gramps vegetables and flooers as he calls them.”

“Probably, they tend to be quite good at eating all the things they’re not supposed to.”

“It would be quite nice to have our own billy-goat. We could call it Gruff, like the fairy tale. Would we get milk from it? People have goat’s milk don’t they?”

“I’m afraid Billy-goats don’t give milk, they’re boys.”

“Does that mean I won’t have milk, because I’m a boy too, really?”

“Um–usually lactation–that’s producing milk occurs after pregnancy.”

“Oh,” Trish looked down at the foot well of the car.

“I’m not sure why you’d want to, but in theory, it is possible to cause some male breasts to produce milk, by giving the right hormones.”

“So I could do it then?”

“Shall we say it’s not impossible, and leave it at that.” I had no idea why she should suddenly be wanting to breast feed and I didn’t feel it was appropriate to ask. If and when she was ready, she’d tell me.”

“When can I start taking the pills to make milk, Mummy?”

I nearly ran into the back of a van in front of me. “What did you say?”

“Maria is going to need help feeding her baby and it would help if I could do some for her.”

I wanted to scoop her up in a hug and squeeze her to show how much I loved her. “That’s very kind of you, Trish, but I think Maria knows what she’s doing and the healing you gave her seemed to do her a lot of good.”

“I did do some good, didn’t I, Mummy?”

More than you’ll ever know, sweetheart; “Yes, darling, you did lots of good.”

“Why did you tell her not to play me at chess?”

“I was joking with her, it was a way of playfully telling her how clever you are.”

“Am I clever, Mummy?”

Only about two points below genius–“Yes, darling, you’re very clever.”

She smiled and clapped her hands together and I could see her milk teeth in the rear view mirror and I had to consciously remember that this was a six not a sixteen year old.

“I think Maria would do nicely,” she whispered to herself.

“Do nicely at what?”

She hadn’t meant me to hear that bit and she went a lovely shade of pink. “Um–nothing, Mummy.”

“Tricia Watts, don’t tell fibs, spit it out.”

She went even deeper pink and finally spluttered her way through her idea that Maria could help me in the house and I could do some dormouse counting. Seeing as I’d been thinking along similar lines I wasn’t sure if this was convergent thinking or what.

However, the first priority was to get her well again and the baby safely looked after, the whys and wherefores were less important at this stage. Once she was well again, then we could see what she wanted to do–she could turn us down.

“When can I take the pills then, Mummy–to give me milky titties,” she thought that was very funny and chuckled away to herself.

“When you’re grown up, if you grew milk carrying breasts you’d look like a hunchback in a fortnight, assuming you didn’t fall flat on your face at the beginning. Personally, I wouldn’t recommend it.”

“I just want to be like a mummy, Mummy.” She looked hurt by my remark as if she’d said something wrong.

“You can do the same as I’ve done, fostering or adopting children who need mummies and or daddies.”

“But you don’t have any babies.”

“No, I have you and the others instead, and I wouldn’t swap you for anyone.”

I glanced in the mirror and she was smiling through very watery eyes.

05Dolce_Red_l_0.jpg

*Authors note — Owing to my bike crash earlier today, I’ve had to cut this one short as my leg is hurting and distracting me, oh and Bonzi was seen bringing a saw into the kitchen.

up
155 users have voted.
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos! Click the "Thumbs Up!" button above to leave a Kudos

Comments

Below Genius?

Not bloody likely!

Every indication is that Trish is at least 2 points ABOVE genius, not below it! Genius level intelligence is defined (ref: Wikipedia) as the top 1% of any age-peer group. And, you won't find one in a thousand as smart as Trish, let alone one in a hundred.

IQ points

Puddintane's picture

The only thing that really counts is "Standard Deviation," which is not a fetish.

For IQ, the standard deviation is about sixteen points for the most common "IQ" test.

"Genius" level is either non-existent as a technical term or more than three standard deviations above the norm, far less than one percent, about a fifth of one percent or less. The "high IQ" societies typically aim for the more rarefied regions, except for the more inclusive outfits like Mensa, the cutoff for which is "bright normal," or "very superior intelligence," anywhere above roughly one and a half standard deviations from the norm, one in every fifty people. "Genius" is somewhat frowned-upon in psychometric circles these days, as it has a flavour of outdated eugenics about it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_IQ_society

Cheers,

Puddin'

A tender heart is an asset to an editor: it helps us be ruthless in a tactful way.
--- The Chicago Manual of Style

-

Cheers,

Puddin'

A tender heart is an asset to an editor: it helps us be ruthless in a tactful way.
--- The Chicago Manual of Style

Aaaahhhhh!

Talk about being a switched-on six year old. Never mind the logistics or practicalities, it's quite an elegant plan she's worked out: Get Maria well, Maria and baby Catherine move in to Tom's home, then Cathy resumes her biological career, Maria helps out around the house and Trish helps feed baby Catherine. Well, all but the last step could theoretically happen, and in about 6 months to a year's time, Trish would be able to help out the feeding... from a bottle of formula milk.

It's a little scary that despite being one of the youngest in the household, she's so assertive and devious that at times it's almost as though she's second in command... (for a start, she's trained both Julie [16] and Billie [9] in girlhood)

 

Bike Resources

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't...

As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

Bonzi

I saw, I saw a puddy tat... oh sorry, wrong kind of saw maybe.

Act your age, not your shoe size, Susie.

I do hope that your leg gets better soon, Angharad. I know I'm legless, but it might be the wine rather than missing limbs.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1084.

Careful Cathy, or thr Blue Light of Trish just might do the trick. With Stella brest feeding and now Maria, aand both with daughrers, the guys are seriously out numbered.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Trish

Thanks A+B, there were some real gems here. I really like the relationship between Cathy and Trish. It's interesting that Trish is capable of both really profound ideas, and then the absolutely naïve:

“Maria is going to need help feeding her baby, and it would help if I could do some for her.”

What was it the psalmist said about 'Out of the mouths of babes...'? (Ps 8:2)

Precious Stuff


Bike Resources

Bonzi don't cut the

Bike up Ang might not be able to afford your favorite cat food, you could end up eating generic till she gets the Bike fixed or replaced

2 out of 5 boxes of tissue and 6.5 gold starsDesHS.jpg

Goddess Bless you

Love Desiree

Goddess Bless you

Love Desiree

Old style field surgery

I was thinking Bonzi was bringing the saw over to do some old style battlefield surgery, i.e., cut the damaged part of the limb off and use a flaming brand of some sort to cauterize it. But you could be right about Bonzi going after the bike, anything's possible with that cat.

Not only is Trish

at or around genius level, She is also proving to be quite adept at getting people to do whatever she has in mind for them....

Wonder if Marie knows just what a crafty little girl Trish can be....Something tells me she is about to find out......

Sorry to hear of your accident Angharad, Hope you (and the bike) will soon be back on the road.... But please take Bonzi's saw off him... Clearly a cat and a saw are not to be trusted, Who knows what he might do if he thinks his food supply might be affected if his mummy can't walk to buy him some more ..

Kirri

Ah ...

... so Bonzi thinks a saw will heal sore knees? I suppose, as Bonzi's a cat, we can excuse the error. Just avoid soaring through the air when you should be firmly on the saddle.

Sorry, being puny again.

Robi

My Trish…

…was smart at age 6, but not as smart as Cathy's wee Trish. Thank heavens, I dread to think what wee Trish will be like when she's a teenager; Ssshh—you know who is a mite too smart for her own good sometimes. Excellent episode BTW, made me giggle.

Sorry to hear about your accident. I hope it's not tooooo painful. Thank goodness you didn't break anything (apart from your pride), Hen. Have a good night's sleep (if you can) and TAKE IT EASY TOMORROW.

Love and hugs,

Hilary & 'er upstairs asleep (I hope)

PS. I'll tell her about your "FOYB" tomorrow.

PPS. I hope the glint in Bonzi's eye wasn't too evil as he brought in the saw; is he partial to raw meat by any chance? H.

Angharad, I do hope you

Angharad, I do hope you recover nicely and soon the only thing hurting is your pride and joy (your bike). Please watch Bonzi for us all; for all we and you know, Bonzi just might be attempting a coup and taking over "Bike" from you. :) Jan

excuses Ang

kristina l s's picture

Really dear a little tumble... Oh tell Bonzi to put the saw down or you'll take him to the Vet every day for a month to get his temp taken.

Had a couple of tumbles when I used to ride a bit. Thrashing along a dead flat road and suddenly I'm upside down with my leg pinned to the crossbar by the handles, I think my foot slipped. The second coming down a steep hill into a city intersection and Joe pedestrian trots out in front. serious swerve and again, upside down in the middle of the road, hey city traffic so...slow..thankfully. Minor grazes in both, luckily. Do take care won't you.

Oh yeah, story.. Ya gots ta love Trish, that's one smart kid. even if at times you might want to shove a football scarf in her mouth. Get well.

Kris

Bikes, boobs and babies.

Firstly sorry to hear about your having fallen off your bike. (I was tempted to say 'snap') but that's too reminiscent of bones going snap.

Secondly I'm glad to read that you're not too badly hurt, (and yes it does hurt like hell!)
As to the precocious genius in the back seat, well the boobs and breast feeding are wonderful ambitions for any little girl to have so why should Trish be any different. A girl is a girl is a girl.

Which leads directly on to the 'thirdly' and that's the sad one. Poor little genius is unlikely to ever experience that delight unless medicine has moved on a long way by the time she's at that age.

So put your feet up, (gently,) pour yourself a nice comforting favourite drink, put the chocolate hob-nobs close to hand and indulge yourself. You deserve it.

Bev.

PS., you haven't said how or why it happened. Come on, tell Auntie Bev.

bev_1.jpg

Sorry to Hear About Your Accident!

You're still writing so I assume that the injuries were minor and the saw in Bonzi's paw was just because she's taken up cabinet making as her newest hobby.

I agree with whomever that Maria may be a good candidate for the position of Domestic Supervisor (couldn't do worse than Stella) so that Cathy can go off to the UN and save the world (for dormice?) provided Maria can deal with all the problems that are going to come up -- this IS Cathy's house we're talking about, after all! Maria seemed, understandably enough, a tad delicate last time we saw her, eh?

Yours from the Great White North,

Jenny Grier (Mrs.)

x

Yours from the Great White North,

Jenny Grier (Mrs.)

Ooooo Ouchies!

Bike accidents are no fun. Being a typical teenager, I experimented with how fast one can take a turn - at 25 miles an hour. Granted I had a pretty wide sweep to work with but I tilted too far and fell and skidded. By the time I stopped, my jeans were ripped and my calf was ripped open, with asphalt embedded in it.

Bonzi, put down that tree saw, put it down. You don't want to hurt mommy do you?

Cathy is going to have a veritable estate going on pretty soon. Luckily she does not live in a shoe! ;)

If Maria does come on board, the family dynamics is going to be just weird. Hopefully, it can give Maria space to do real healing, so it is a win win.

Kim

Maria and 8 single ladies

In a couple of years the young men will start showing in droves. There's Julie, and Stella, Billie, Ollie, Trish, Meems, and the two babies. Eventually the younger side will grow into it. Interesting times indeed. Wonder if Tom will be amused or go all protective? A little of both I imagine. Simon will just want to close the castle gates.

Long after it happened, hope everything is intact and proper on the bike front.

Good thing it was a leg, not fingers

Hey, you are not to follow the life of the story's character this closely. Soon you may be shooting arrows into people with accents, and I don't mean Welch. Take care, follow the doctor's orders. Be good, let Whizz help out.

Cefin