Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 1195.

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The Daily Dormouse.
(aka Bike)
Part 1195
by Angharad

Copyright © 2010 Angharad
All Rights Reserved.
  
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The week went by very quickly, in between taking the girls to school, feeding the baby and visiting Jim or being visited by the police myself, I seemed always busy.

The police weren’t entirely happy with my story but the only bit of video they had of it tended to agree with what I’d told them. Amazingly, Jim wasn’t in the video at all so they weren’t asking him about carrying a hand size field gun in his pocket. If he had been seen, they’d have arrested him for possession of a handgun, which are illegal in the UK — especially one designed to shoot Sarah Palin or was that a Moose–either way, they’re both large stupid creatures: one being a giant deer the other being a contestant on reality TV–are ’Mericans really dumb enough to let her run for the presidency–don’t answer that.

“Which bank did you go into?” asked the police.

“A branch of High Street, my father in law owns them, my husband works for them–I sent him a message, through their internal system.”

“Why couldn’t you phone?”

“I tried, he wasn’t answering, nor was his secretary.”

“What about email?”

“I did that as well, from my Blackberry.”

“Do you always try this hard to communicate with him?”

“Depends upon the message, I don’t go to London very often and I have a young family.”

“Given you’re transsexual, how did you manage that?” The detective from Scotland Yard had done some homework.

“I find that remark offensive,” said my lawyer.

“No, that’s okay, I’ll answer it. I fostered several children whom we have since adopted, the youngest being a few months old and I’m still breast feeding.” I emphasised the last part. The copper’s eyes nearly popped out as he got his brain round it.

“So was your husband gonna breast feed it for you?” responded the copper.

I could see Andrea Bright’s leg twitching. “That’s the second offensive remark, one more and we withdraw our assistance.”

“Fine, I’ll arrest her.”

“Fine, we’ll take you to court for wrongful arrest–it would be a pity to increase the level of unemployed but I’ll make an exception for you.”

“Are you threatening me, lady?”

“No, I’m pointing out the consequences of your actions, which are at best offensive if not transphobic. Lady Cameron is here of her own volition and is answering your questions reasonably, I expect some courtesy from you in reciprocation for hers.”

“I wanna know why it was so important she talk to her husband, ‘specially when she’s got a bloody nanny at home–don’t she do anythin’?”

“Jenny is a very good nanny and I’d already spoken to her. You must understand that having five children under seven is very hard work even for a professional nanny.”

“So why didn’t you just go home?”

“I take it you don’t have any children, detective inspector?”

“No–I ain’t married.”

“Ah, I’d heard that some gay men don’t like transsexuals.” Two can play at insults.

“I’m not gay–that’s bloody good coming from you–I suppose you had your dick cut off so you wouldn’t seem such a fairy?”

“That does it. This interview is over, I’m taking my client away.”

“If you do I’ll arrest him.”

Andrea went ballistic, “What sort of arsehole are you, apart from being so full of shit you smell. My client is female, legally and in all other respects, you have an obligation to respect her as such.”

“Do I, is that just because she can afford big shot barristers like you?”

“No, because it’s the law, dummy. I have recorded this interview, I shall be sending a copy to your superiors as well as the Police Complaints Authority. I hope you enjoy being back on the beat.”

Andrea took my arm and we walked out of the police station, once we got clear I asked her, “Do you really think they’d arrest me?”

“Only if they’re stupid.”

“Did you really record the interview?”

“Oh yes, I don’t believe anyone these days unless I can prove it. He was just a typical dickhead who though he was big shot because he can bully people.”

“The police have beaten me up before.”

“Have they now? When was that?”

“Oh a while ago, back in Portsmouth.”

“Not this lot then?”

“No.”

“Pity, we could have made more of it. I find it all so disgraceful–you’re female, your birth certificate says so. Okay, you can’t have children, but then neither can my sister and she’s spent a fortune on IVF treatment, they’re opting for a surrogate pregnancy now.”

“I’m sorry, it must be awful for her.”

“But you know how she feels?”

“No, I can’t say that can I? I can empathise with her, but that’s all.”

“Spoken like a real woman. Look I have to be in court in an hour, if you get any more problems with them, let me know immediately and I’ll come and spring you.”

“Thank you, Andrea, you’re very kind.”

“Simon is an old friend, but kind I’m not–he’ll be getting a suitably large account for this morning.”

“I’m going to see Jim, they should be letting him home soon.”

“Oh your partner in crime?”

“Yes, he’s the only reason I’m not lying in a mortuary somewhere riddled with bullets.”

“Yes, I saw your statement–horrifying that gangsters can get their hands on machine guns. However, I suspect that he wasn’t unarmed himself.”

“I didn’t see a gun.”

“No of course not.”

“I’m not lying, I didn’t see one.”

That doesn’t mean he didn’t have one or that you knew about it–knowledge before or after the fact. The car was riddled with bullet holes too and the occupants had been shot before being toasted.”

“I think there must have been some sort of gang war going on, bullets were zinging everywhere.”

“And you just happened upon it?”

“Not quite, we’d managed to have arrested quite a few of the gang, the big cheese was after us which we knew from the attempt on the way up.”

“Why were they after you and Julie before?”

“I didn’t stop to ask them, they didn’t look much like good conversationalists.”

“You can tell me, I am your barrister.”

“I don’t know,” I lied, the fewer people who knew about the keys the better, however, I needed to know what to do with the five million in my deposit box. I needed to speak with Jim. We parted, her off to court, me to Charring Cross Hospital.

It’s a huge general hospital on Fulham Palace Road, I was very glad I hadn’t had to go there for my treatment, but I did see one of the gender patients, at least I thought it was one, a female to male–short, broad hipped and lots of straggly facial hair, small hands and feet. They got out of the lift a floor before mine so I was left to contemplate what I’d say to Jim about things and the police being unpleasant.

I walked into the ward and asked if I could go and see him–it wasn’t officially visiting time. “He’s not here, he was discharged this morning.”

“Oh, he didn’t let me know.” As the nurse was making apologetic noises my phone peeped with a text.

“Maybe that’s him now, he wasn’t expecting you until visiting time.”

“Perhaps.” I dug in my bag and pulled out my phone.

‘We hve UR li’l frend, U hve our munny. Will be in touch.’

I felt my whole body begin to tremble–it wasn’t over.

“Are you alright, my dear, you look like you’ve just seen a ghost?” I heard from some distance away as I slumped to the floor still clutching my Blackberry.

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Comments

Give the Girl a Rest

littlerocksilver's picture

Well, we knew it wasn't going to happen. There were too many unresolved things running around. I wonder what Little Friend they are referring to.

Portia

Portia

ooh, you are...

kristina l s's picture

... 'orrible, but I like you. Yeah I know that should be 'awful' but this fits better here.

Kris

Damm

Aww man, you always manage to put us in suspense with cathy

Makes my Literany Efforts seem puny

You'd think that the even the Met would know better

than to harrass a transwoman - especially as they employ at least one. How to lose your job and your pension in one easy lesson.

Now, which offensive/defensive tactic will Cathy use to get out of this latest bind?

S.

I'm conflicted here!...

I don't want the series to finish, but I want Cathy to have her 'Happy Ever After' She's had so many of these trans-phobic-coppers, Russian-mobsters, and gangland types after her that she needs a break!

Maybe a plotline tie-up then prepare for volume 2?

I think Bonzi and Angharad deserves a rest as well ;)

Val

The police "doofus" was way

The police "doofus" was way off base and definitely needs to be taken out back of the woodshed for a good hiding. His attitude is exactly the type that causes people to generally not like police officers. He gives all other police personnel a truly bad name and casts them all into the same transphobic barrel. I hope Cathy's attorney will really stick it too him. I just knew Cathy's little interlude with normalacy would not last and it appears so. Rats! Now she has another crisis to tend to. Bows and Arrows at 60 paces anyone? Jan

I've had no mistreatment by the Coppers.

I feel so blessed. It is said that I have two angels looking after me.

Amazingly, the Portland Police were always very nice to me, inspite of a couple situations that looked really bad. Bad enough that ... yes well no one needs that story yet again.

The worst treatment I ever had from anyone was by either other Muslims, or a Korean intern at the local Uni Hospital. I know others get really bad treatment at times, and I am sorry it happens.

Cathy has gotten herself into quite a sticky wicket here. I am waiting to see how Angharad solves it.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Khadijah

The plot sickens...

I'm presuming that the ‘li’l frend’ referred to is Jim.

Does Cathy have any way of contacting the SBS people? Maybe Henry could help.

Given that a number of the Indians have been arrested, and the big cheese was toasted in the scene from High Noon, there can't be many of the ‘Sarf Lunnon’ mob left. It would seem that like a cancer, the whole lot are going to have to be destroyed.

Thanks A+B: you do manage to keep the intensity levels up.

Pressure Stress


Bike Resources

Arrest

So, she's there as a 'voluntary attender' and therefore will have been advised that she is not under arrest and free to leave at any time, under the provisions of PCEA '84. And he threatens to, er, arrest her if she decides to leave....

Yup, that's the Met.

Bike pt 1195

Time for Cathy to don her green leotard and tights, and get her archery gear out.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

OhOh!

And I thought I was due for a couple of mornings of 'sugar coated serial' instead I get the 'Full Welsh'.

Ah well, just 'ave to see where this one goes.

That copper's a bit of a twat, (well a big twat actually,) but if the barrister's got the interview on tape them woe betide.

Angie's obviously got 'an agenda here' concerning police interviews.

I must confess, the police have come a long long way since my first experiences with them a long long time ago (Over 50 years ago).

Of all the agencies of care or officialdom, the Police seemed to have come the furtherest in my estimation.

Still lovin it.

Love an' hugs,
OXOXOX.

Beverly.

Growing old disgracefully.

bev_1.jpg

What a nasty surprise

for Cathy, There she was thinking everything was nearly sorted and then this!

Although it seems things are somewhat black at the moment, Lets not forget just how resourceful Jim is, And if you add to that Cathy on a mission to help her friend, Then you have what could be an unstoppable force....In fact you ALMOST feel sorry for the bad boys Little do they know what might be coming their way their way....Very soon !!

Kirri

Police around my state

I live in oregon, In the willamette valley (basically the I5 corridor), Generally the Police are pretty well trained in LGBT community relations, yea there's a rotten apple or two out there,but Its alot better than many other places around the world I've been. Portland has/had a Police chief with an lesbian daughter that was quite open & He even marched in the gay pride parade, in a much smaller town, & this was a major surprize to me Silverton had a Transsexual mayor. I think she could of perhaps made a better effort in appearance, but I was fairly surprized she won, due to the hi proportion of religious activity in that area. but BIGOTRY exists big time in this state also, and getting out of the willamette valley, you'll see heavy doses of it. What really funny is Eugene Ore. which maybe one of the most liberal cities in the USA. where almost merged now days with one of the most conserative Springfield & home to the HQ of the Assemblies of god church. one of the most bigoted churches in the nation.

GBLT has come along way around my country & other ones too, I see this explosion mostly due to one thing INTERNET. I'm not sure it's because we can communicate so freely, the fact so many of us discover that we're not alone and there's a fair amount resources that we can turn to for information & help, OR just a place to go VENT and someone actually listen. I can remember many a evening when down ,being to find a chat room & perhaps whine,& vent and not have everyone down my throat. DEf helped my sanity alot.

but going back to police issues. of recent yr there's been so many laws & policies updated on discrimination, it's refreshing that the SILENT MAJORITY OF GOOD FOLKS are hearing the pleas and doing something.

The only thing that bothers me is the "T" being left off GBL when those policies/laws get enacted, like we want ya to go out & stand in frontlines, but when we go behind closed doors to negociate., go over behind that curtain so you wont scare the natives off. Maybe thats why in last few yrs I've curtailed my involvement with most activity

It ain't over till it's over,

and it ain't over.

Looks like another cop is about to receive a lesson in manners.