(aka Bike) Part 1031 by Angharad Copyright © 2010 Angharad
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On Sunday morning, quite early–it was only eight o’clock, I took Billy for his second ride. He seemed to think he was up to it, so we went a bit longer and did fifteen miles. I also took him up on to the downs and we had to stop a couple of times for him to get his breath back. However, he kept insisting he was enjoying it. We pulled over into a car park at one of the viewpoints and stopped for a drink and some energy bars.
There were one or two cars about, presumably walkers or dog owners. We were busy admiring the view over the sea when a dog came bouncing up to greet us. Billy was initially a bit frightened but he soon relaxed when the boxer dog licked him and went bounding off back to its owner.
“Fancy seeing you here?” said a familiar voice.
I looked around and saw a familiar face, “I didn’t know you had a dog,” I said.
“Yes, dumb animal is the right description for him, too.”
“Is that Dr Sage, Mummy?”
“Yes, sweetheart.”
“Good grief; you haven’t cycled out here on a Sunday morning, have you?”
“Yes, we have.”
“Good for you and your daughter, sorry I’ve forgotten your name um–“
“It’s Billy, and I’m a boy.”
“Whoops, sorry about that, I forgot your mother had boys as well. You haven’t reconsidered about the UN job, have you, Cathy?”
“No, why?”
“It’s still open. I now have three professors who think you should do it.”
“I don’t have enough seniority to do it, it requires a professor to do it.”
“They don’t seem to think so.”
“You’re not offering enough money.”
“Probably not, but it’s a hugely prestigious appointment.”
“If it was, you’d be trampled in the stampede for it.”
“Oh we’ve had several applicants, but none we consider suitable.”
“So how come I’m suitable?”
“You’ve a proven record of producing a quality product, whether it’s counting dormice and promoting their conservation, or setting up a national survey, or making a very educational but entertaining film. What you do, you do well.”
“I still have six kids to look after.”
“Employ someone to help.”
“Find someone else.”
“Have another think, Cathy. Talk it over with Tom and Simon.”
“I don’t have time.”
“I really think you should seriously consider it, I’ll email you the latest job description.”
“You sent me one before.”
“It’s changed–I’ll send it on to you.” He gathered his dumb mutt, put it in the back of his Land Rover and drove off.”
“Why did that man think I was a girl, Mummy?”
“I don’t know, kiddo–probably because he’s not used to children.”
“Is it because I was riding a girl’s bike?”
“No, sweetheart, he wouldn’t be able to tell without looking at it very closely.”
“Is it because I’m small?”
“I don’t know–does it bother you?”
“Sometimes I think you’d love me more if I was a girl.”
I put down my bike and bid him do the same, then I grabbed him and told him quite categorically, “I love you for who you are. Being a boy or a girl doesn’t make any difference to me, or to the others. We all love you.”
He hugged me and I heard and felt him sob. Why did this have to happen? Had I precipitated it? I hoped not, but perhaps I had unconsciously.
“They sometimes call me girly in school.”
“Who does?”
“Some of the kids–Danny has had fights because of it.”
“When did this start–recently?”
“No–for ages. It’s ‘cos I’m small, isn’t it?”
“You’re small and delicate looking.” and very pretty for a boy, “Tthat’s possibly why.”
“Is it nice being a girl?”
“It’s okay–yeah, I think so, but then I would, wouldn’t I?”
“Because you’re a lady?”
“Yes, but I’m sure if you asked Daddy, he’d tell you it was better being a boy.”
“People wouldn’t laugh at me if I was a girl, would they?”
“I didn’t know they laughed at you now.”
“Sometimes they do.”
“Oh, sweety-pie, I wish you’d told me.”
“So you could make me a girl?”
“No, so I could stop them teasing you.”
“They said I look like you, they saw you on the telly.”
“Who are they, Billy?” I asked hugging him.
“Boys in my school.”
“Do you know their names?”
“Yes, but if you complain, I’ll get even worse bullying. Jonathon Napier’s mum complained and he ended up in hospital, where they pushed him in front of a car.”
“Good gracious–didn’t anyone do anything about it?”
“If they did, they’d have something awful happen to them.”
“Do you want me to see if I can get you transferred to another school?”
“What, like Trish and Livvie’s school?”
“That’s a girl’s school, silly.”
“Maybe I’d be better off being a girl–Trish an’ Julie are.”
“Yes but they felt they were girls inside. They haven’t chosen to be girls because they thought life would be easier, in fact, it probably makes life harder–talk to Trish about it.”
“I have, she said I’d like their school, apart from the religion stuff.”
“You talked with Trish about attending a girl’s school?”
“Yeah–well, about her goin’ to it, an’ I said it sounds nicer than my school an’ she said I’d like it there.”
“Except you have to be a girl.”
“Maybe that’s what I shoulda been?”
My stomach began to flip over and over–in some ways our household is the safest place in the universe to ponder such things, and even try them, but what would social services say? I need to speak with Stephanie, and she needs to see this young man before he says or does something silly.
It was now nine o’clock and I called Stephanie, then asked her to hold. “If I ask Dr Stephanie to see you, would you talk to her about this?”
Billy nodded.
“Sorry Steph, look you’re not going to believe this...”
“Try me?”
“Billy is possibly wishing he was a girl.”
“Oh, not entirely surprising in your household, is it?”
“Well, I was surprised by it.”
“You must be the only one, then. So if he can’t beat ‘em he wants to join ‘em–is that it?”
“I think I’d like you to ask him that.”
“Okay–when d’you want me to see him?”
“When are you free?”
“I’m not, I come at huge expense–this afternoon, and the dinner had better be worth it?”
“Fish or meat?”
“Hmm–decisions, decisions–you don’t have any lamb, do you.”
“I have a leg of lamb for dinner, curiously enough.”
“You’re a bad liar, Cathy.”
“It can be arranged.”
“Say, sixish?”
“That’s fine, see you then.”
“What’s happening, Mummy?”
“Dr Stephanie is coming for dinner, and to speak with you.”
“I won’t have to wear a dress will I?”
“Not unless you want to–do you?”
“I don’t know,” he hugged me and burst into tears and it was all I could do not to follow suit. It was going to be a long ride back.
Comments
Billy
This is becoming an interesting development. Who's to say what is right.
Portia
Portia
Disabused!
Poor little Billy needs to be disabused of the notion that he needs to change sexes simply because his life as a boy is a little rough at the moment. Good grief. The poor lad's head must be exploding from trying to process all this. Thank heavens Cathy isn't a mother character in one of those TG stories where a boy would make a better girl... ummm... wait a sec...
Well, you know what I mean!
___________________
If a picture is worth 1000 words, this is at least part of my story.
Complications!
Argh! First Gareth turns up, mistakes Billy for a girl, then offers Cathy the UN job (again!) - this time with a revised job description. Somehow I think he's going to keep pushing until she eventually accepts it.
Then Billy drops the bombshell - because of his small stature and androgynous looks, he's often called "Girly" at school - and some lads have even drawn comparisons between his looks and those of Cathy. At least Cathy did the right thing and immediately get on the phone to Stephanie.
But the bullies at his current school sound quite dangerous - and we thought the Browne-Cowards were bad...
And yet he probably wouldn't be exempt from such taunting at an independent school - particularly an all-male one - and, of course, whichever school he goes to, verbal taunts are very difficult for staff to take action against, because there's no physical evidence - unless they're daft enough to try taunting him within earshot of a teacher...
EAFOAB Episode Summaries
As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!
Taunting
He could take a page from his mom's book and carry around some kind of a sound recorder. If Cathy thinks a cell phone is a bit OTT, he could carry one of the MP3 players that come with a record feature.
I think the word you're looking for is
Oh, 'Eck!
Sorry, that's two words; my maths always was crap.
This is going to take some delicate handling and, given Cathy's and Simon's volatile natures, it's bound to put further strain on their relationship.
Susie
Dr. Stephanie Can Sort It Out
I think Dr. Stephanie can sort it out. I do think that some in Social Services may try to blame Cathy if this does turn out to be true. Billy may have been trying to fit in as best he could at the orphanage and he may have been bullied by other boys there too. He may have buried his desire to be a girl to protect himself from even worse treatment. Now that he is in an environment where he sees Trish and Julie being loved and accepted, his defenses are falling away and he is finally feeling safe enough to admit what he is feeling inside. He really didn't protest much at all about getting a girl's bike. A lot of other boys would have been adamantly opposed to anything remotely girly. I couldn't remember, but is he the one that was injured in his balls or was that Danny? If it was Billy, he might develop a problem from it that would require surgery to remove them.
AK! too many girls!
This is taking place in Hampshire County? Good heavens, is there Nuclear waste in the wells? This is well beyond the statistical limits of reasonabilty, init? Well, at least at home no one is taunting him. I can sympathise with the poor boy's feelings because he is so small. Because of his poor early home conditions, I wonder what Mr Oedepus did this time?
I was in the 3rd percentile, or lower until 18 or so then grew to a towering 5'7". :)
Khaduuj
Interesting, very interesting!
It has been noted that all the 'girls' are beginning to look like Cathy. She's even had to repeatedly point out that they are adopted not biological. No one mentioned Danny beginning to look like Cathy, only Billy. Is it the blue light force that is causing the girls to become more like Cathy? It seems to work when people are in Cathy's presence. Remember Cathy not only bought Billy a girl's bike, but also the only bike kit that would fit him was a girl's. This could have contributed to DR. Sage's confusion.
Both Billy and Danny were the ringleaders of the group tormenting Trish at the group home. As the wild bunch, they were the last ones and most difficult to place, so Cathy, who had taken difficult children before, was asked to foster them.
I'm glad Cathy is taking a cautious approach to Billy's dilemma and confusion. Everything must be done to ensure that Billy has the freedom to choose without unnecessary pressure for anyone or group. I hope the adoption goes through before social services gets wind of Billy's situation and causes trouble.
Hugs,
Trish-Ann
~There is no reality, only perception~
Hugs,
Trish Ann
~There is no reality, only perception~
Cycle clothing
My partner and I are often almost identically dressed - lycra shorts, club tops, cycle helmets and SPD shoes - as are lots of other couples we know but there's never any confusion as to gender, so it's unlikely that the either the clothes or the bike confused Dr Sage. In fact the gender of pre-pubescent children, particularly small ones, isn't easy to detect without secondary clues like behaviour or gender specific clothes although girls (unfairly?) are allowed to wear boys' dress without comment. The reverse isn't so.
Not sure where Anghard's going with this (and perhaps neither is she) but it might be interesting to see if Billy leans a little to the TG side but then makes a decision that it's not for him. Just for a bit of variety.
Robi
Poor Billy
Nope, it's no fun being a girl at time. Despite all the wishful thinking that goes on in some of the stories in BCTS, it can indeed be hell and limiting to be a woman in what is really, STILL, a man's world. For heaven's sake, I am the only woman engineer in my current company office at the moment, to give an example.
I am guessing Billy is just feeling the pressure of being physically vulnerable, much like most younger girls feel. Unfortunately he has to fit in to the boy hierarchy. In a way I was 'lucky' as a kid to be fair sized and I did not take kindly to be manhandled but to be really delicate looking ....
Well whatever path Billy takes, let's hope for the best.
Oh and Cathy should tell Gareth to stick it where the sun don't shine.
Kim
Bike pt 1031.
If Billy was to have a growth spurt and shoot up a few inches, he'd not have such issues, or if he did, wouldn't be because he's so small and girly. Right now, he is identifying with his mum and might be why he wants to be like Cathy. Once he has fun in another sport, he might choose to be a guy again.
May Your Light Forever Shine
May Your Light Forever Shine
Episodes 999 and 1,000...
...were about Billy's angst over his gender too. I had thought things were resolved at that point. Silly me!
I can't help but feel that Billy sees a gender-change as a way of coping with present adversities. Hopefully Stephanie will help him to sort out his real feelings. As I commented after Part 999: If Billy decides to be Billie, a visit to Dr Stephanie might be in order. It looks like Cathy and our esteemed authors agree. Is this a case of great minds thinking alike, or fools seldom differing?
Thanks A&B for another cliffhanger. Of course, this wouldn't be Bike without a liberal dose of them!
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Feel bad for Billy
Life is rough on kids and being small certainly makes it worse. Sounds like the bullys at his school are pretty extreme and perhaps Cathy needs to do some investigation. Talking with Dr Stephanie is a good thing and he definitely does not need to wear a dress.
As many
commentors have already said, Poor Billy, What a situation to find himself in , Thankfully Cathy has decided that professional help is needed, And who better to help than the lovely Stephanie .
Hopefully by the time i comeback from a few days break things might be a little clearer for Billy, But one thing is for certain , Whatever the good doctor finds out, Life for Billy should become a little easier for the troubled little boy.
Kirri
I think too many commenters + Cathy glossed over
what they read or in her case jumped to conclusions.
IE ...
“Good for you and your daughter, sorry I’ve forgotten your name um—“
“It’s Billy, and I’m a boy.â€
“Whoops, sorry about that, I forgot your mother had boys as well. You haven’t reconsidered about the UN job, have you, Cathy?â€
He's a boy, it took him no time @ all to correct a strangers comment about him. He may be a small boy & needs to be seeing a medical doctor about his sizing, & Cathy prob. should see about his family to see if they had several smaller males in family history.
I really hate it when people jump to conclusions or dont pay attention of what is said or viewed, that being said, hmm, maybe not, thinking back to some of my early transition days, when blending in was paramont, figuring that if it's in a dress, it must be ----- people see what they wanna see or hear
but in this case, Billy DEF made loud & clear what he was, so i'd be looking for medical issues.
In the end
It is Billy's choice. Let him be and think about it. Ultimately we'll find out.
Billy has questions on sexuality.
Well, that makes the bike and gear okay then. Well, we should have expected it, I guess. Billy's been left alone so it's his turn to have his head shrunk a bit. Good thing Dr Steff can be bought for food.
Cefin