We were sitting in her bedroom talking, like two teenage girls, her parents seemed to see me as one anyway, and before long she was shaping and painting my finger nails with a very light pink varnish. I protested but she carried on all the same. Next while they were drying, she brushed out my hair and put it into one long plait, which reached halfway down my back and which was held with elastics at the top, middle and bottom. Finally she put some stuff on my almost invisible blond eyelashes, then half an hour later cleaned it off. "That looks better," she said.

"What was it," I asked being too lazy to stand up and look in her mirror.

"Eyelash conditioner, it gives them a little stronger colour."

"Oh, I'd better wash it off when I get home before my dad sees it."

"It doesn't wash off, it fades over the next few weeks." She said this as if it was of no consequence. Then she pulled out my ear studs and put in two bright red poppies which were a probably a couple of centimetres in diameter. I was trying to protest when she dabbed my lips with a red lip gloss. "There that looks a bit better, you can keep it, as I bought it for you anyway." She dumped the lip gloss in my hand and then handed me my ear studs. I dare you to wear the ear studs to school tomorrow."

"Why? It says you are allowed to wear one pair of earrings provided they don't dangle and risk catching them on equipment or clothing."

"I don't know, Murray is always looking to expel me, he could see this as provocation."

I stood up and looked at the earrings, they were lovely but hardly suitable for a boy to wear, my zirconium stars, the ones I held in my hand were pretty girly as it was, but quite small and thus discreet. That could hardly be said for my new poppies. Then I saw my eyelashes, top and bottom lashes looked like I was wearing mascara and with the lip gloss made me look like a girl - I mean I looked like a girl at the best of times, but this looked like someone wearing makeup, which I suppose I was.

"I hope this stuff comes off my eyelashes," I said peering more closely in the mirror.

"I told you, it fades over the next few weeks."

"What? They'll kill me."

"Just act girly and no one will come near you."

"Except to insult, abuse or beat me up, you mean?"

"They won't will they?"

"Yeah, and that's just my dad."

"Oh, sorrrreee, I didn't think. Look try some of my makeup remover," she handed me the bottle and some cotton pads. I scrubbed at my eyes until they felt a bit sore and when I looked, my eyelashes were still very dark. She showed me the pack, it was black eyelash dye with conditioner - wonderful.

I rushed back home hoping to avoid my father but ran straight into my mother. "Been playing Charlotte, have we? You'd better get that makeup off before your dad sees it."

I grimaced, "That might be a problem..."

Shaking her head at me she said, "You'll have to go to school tomorrow but if they say anything, tell them to call me and I'll tell them you were messing about with your girlfriend and she got carried away."

"Thanks, Mum."

"Your hair looks nice, for a girl," she added the second bit as I smiled and slipped past her to go to my bedroom. Once there I assessed my naked body in the mirror. Beneath my girlish hair and face my very slim body bulged very slightly at my breasts but not enough to show through clothing, and my narrow waist and spreading hips looked quite female. No wonder trousers were such a problem until I bought girl's ones, black uniform ones, which the girls wore in the sixth form or in bad weather.

I managed to avoid Dad at breakfast and I despaired about the eyelash dye as my lashes still looked as if I'd used mascara. Thankfully, the lip gloss wiped off. I decided to go as late as I could to try and avoid confrontations. However, I walked straight into Murray who took one look at me and exploded.

"What is the meaning of this, Watts?"

"What, sir?"

"Wearing makeup, you little queer. Go and wipe it off this instant."

"I can't, sir, it won't wipe off." I had changed the earrings back to my studs and he sneered at them as they were more visible with my plaited hair.

"You are a disgrace to this school, walking about looking like a male whore. If you're going to look like a bloody girl, go and change into the girl's uniform and see me when you return. Go," he pointed at the door and feeling about half an inch tall I trudged home.

"I thought I told you to get them to call me to explain," said my mother. "Here, make a cuppa and I'll speak to Mr Murray." She went off to ring the school and I walked into the kitchen feeling like poo warmed up.

I heard her trying to reason with the sociopath who reigned over my school like a mediaeval monarch. "But, Mr Murray, it was a bit of fun which went wrong, his girlfriend didn't realise it was permanent...very well, I'll send him back when he's changed."

"Waste of time?" I asked handing her a cup of tea.

"He insisted if you look like a girl you wear the girl's uniform, until the eyelash dye fades."

"But that could be weeks, Mum," I nearly dropped my mug.

"I'll speak to my salon a bit later to see if there's anything they can do to hurry it, I'd better get another blouse, run along and change, there's a good girl and, Charlotte, wait until I see that little Welsh madam."

"It was an accident, Mum, she didn't mean to cause trouble."

"She should have known that eyelash dye doesn't wash off."