Every now and then
The darkness tries to chase me
And my legs are getting tired of running
Ohh, please don't,
Please don't let it get to me
Ohhh, I don't want to give up that easily
But the darkness keeps chasing me, me

“You look nice this morning.”
“I blame all of this on Julie.”
“Is that perfume?”
“Don’t go there,” I ordered with a finger point to his chest.
“Still looks good,” he replied as we backed out of the driveway. “Can we pick April up?”
The thought of hitting her with my car zipped into my mind and left as fast as it flew in. “Sure. How late did you stay up talking with her?”
“Eh, I think it after midnight.”
“What do talk about for so long?”
I could imagine they played that ridiculous game of ‘I’m going to hang up now…’ back and forth ad infinitum.
“What? We used to talk for hours about everything.”
“And?”
“And…we talked about, you know, stuff.”
Yeah, we used to talk on for hours and hours about nothing in particular: from cartoons to hockey.
“I assume she’s not into wrestling?”
“Not yet, but we’re working on the difference between ‘rasslin and wrestling. She talked about the dress she was going to get for Winterfest.”
I nodded and after a long pause I looked at Frank.
“What about you?”
“What about me?”
“You lost.”
“You cheated.”
“From a certain point of view.”
“First off, you’re not Obi-wan Kenobi and second-”
“Second, don’t be surprised if someone asks you out today?”
“Who?”
“Do I detect an inquiring mind?”
“No, you detect walking to school with April.”
“I’m willing to do that, so are you willing to accept if someone, you know, talks to you?”
“Are you paying them?”
“Joanna, I’m just saying you need to go out and be more…you.”
I squinted my eyes and looked back at Frank. “Define: you.”
“I mean, okay, the hair and make-up, which, again, looks great on you, and you have to admit that you want someone to notice you. You want that dream date.”
“Is Justin Timberlake coming to town?”
“Daydream date then.”
“I have put some thought into it, Frank, I really have. But, I don’t think my quote, dream date, goes to Reardan.”
“Kay, how about the three of us go bowling in town and you meet someone there.”
“Bowling?”
“Yes.”
“Are you going to actually bowl or just attempt to study April’s tonsils?”
“Study her ton…? Shut up.”
“You went there.”
“I just gave a suggestion for you to go and meet people.”
“While wearing ugly shoes around weighted balls.”
“You said weighted balls.”
“Settle down, Beavis.”

We went back and forth about the places we used to think would be a great place to pickup up girls and would go in the entirely opposite direction.
“Oh, I know a place.”
“Where?” I actually tried to hide my emotions and almost got away with it.
“Roller skating.”
“No thank you.”
“C’mon, Jo, you love roller skating.”
“Blading. I like roller blading, which is not allowed at the rink.”
Frank shrugged as we turned down the street to April’s house. If I had to take her home this afternoon, she’d assume I was her personal chauffeur. I almost asked Frank about it but he lowered the window and yelled out.
“April!”
She waved to him and walked up to meet us. Frank got out of the front and opened the backseat door form her.
“Hello, Joanna.”
“Hey, April,” I replied with a quick smile.
Frank closed the front door and then got in the backseat next to April.
“How are you this morning?” Frank asked.
“I’m great. A little tired, thanks to you.”
“I wasn’t going to hang up until you did.”
“And then we’d find something new to talk about and an hour later, we’re still trying to end the call” April replied with s giggle.
“I’ll stay up all night with you if you want.”
I looked at them in my rear-view mirror. They were way too close to each other for my comfort. April would laugh and smile at everything Frank said. The laughs sounded like the flirty, but fake kind. The hey, I’m going to be nice to this loser for the time being tone of voice. The tone teenage guys never can hear; a dog whistle of death hidden behind platitudes and sexuality. I wondered if she knew I, too, was fluent in bitch.
We arrived at school, and they were still talking about anything and everything. I almost turned the radio on, which was something I never did as I couldn’t stand any of the morning DJ’s but there were a few times I had to think what sort of prattle I really wanted to hear that morning. I settled on hearing the two of them to learn more about April…besides her saying she wanted to be a teacher and hated burritos and roller skating. Frank looked at my eyes in the mirror upon that revelation.
“Do you like to bowl?” He asked as he opened the door.
“I do.”
“We should go sometime this week, if you like.”
“I’d like that. Now, I admit, I have to get to first place a little early, so I’ll meet you at break, ok?”
“You got it” Frank replied before she kissed him on the cheek and then ran to the school.
“Just a few cuddles and a peck on the cheek?”
“Yeah, as much as I’m ‘interested in her tonsils’, as you say.”
“And we both know you are.”
“Beside the point.” Frank said with a snort.
“And exactly what is the point?” I inquired as I grabbed my bag and purse; then locked the doors.
“Okay, I’ll show you.”
Frank walked around the car to the driver’s side.
“Give me your hands.”
I lashed my backpack and purse to my shoulders and put out out my hands like I was ready to punch someone.
“Neutral position, Chuck. Like this.”
He laid his hands out flat, and I copied him.
Frank then took a hold of my hands and looked into my face. “I want to tell her how important she is to me. I want it to last. I want to be able squeeze her hands and gaze into her eyes and see her looking back at me.
I felt my heart racing and I didn’t want it to end. In fact, I wanted to do as he suggested but he was just describing what he wanted to do with April, and I was just her proxy.
He then came closer, moving our hands to allow so we almost touching noses.
“And when the time comes, I’ll tell her I love her.”
“When do you see that happening?”
“Not sure,” he replied as he let go of my hands and stepped back. “But if tell her, I’ll be forced to use drastic measure.”
“Such as? I asked as I tried to control the flushing in my cheeks.
“I’ll give Carson your phone number.”
“He already has a date,” I answered as we started walking to the school.
“Is it Amy?’
“No.”
“Christy?”
“Nope.”
“Am I sensing some jealousy? Do you like Carson?”
“I don’t exactly ‘hate’ him; and maybe if he did ask me, I’d go.”
“You don’t say?” Frank asked with a slight grin.
“No, you are not going to say anything to him.”
“Joanna and Carson, sittin’ in a tree…”
We walked into the crowded hallway and to our lockers. Neither of us spoke about anything for a few seconds but during those brief moments my heart wanted to carve out an amazing future. We already bickered like an old married couple already. However, my brain took control and shook all of those thoughts out of mind as I unloaded my backpack, gathered my books and handed Frank my chemistry book, which was filled with my sister’s notes scrawled in the margins.
“Do you have a dollar, Jo?”
“Getting a donut for you and April?”
“Uhh, yeah. Can you add it to my tab?”
I nodded, reached into my purse and handed him a dollar.
“Thank you. I’ll talk to Carson for you,” he replied as he ran down the hall.
“That will be the last thing you do!” I yelled. Frank put his left hand up and waved back at me.
“Good morning, Joanna,” a voice said that sent a slight chill down my back.
“Anthony.” I shouldn’t have said anything nor turned around, but I did anyway.
Anthony looked at my face and his eyes then went a bit south for a second before he looked at my face again.
“You look good.”
“Thank you,” I replied with a flat tone of voice.
“Can I walk with you to class?”
“Whatever,” I replied as I closed my locker. Anthony kept his distance but hovered by my right side.
“We should talk.”
“Nothing to talk about.”
“Then can I do the talking?”
“Speak, then,” I replied with an eye roll.
“I told my parents what happened yesterday, and they agreed with you that I deserved it and a lot more.”
I nodded.
“What I mean, Joanna, is that there’s nothing I can do about what happened in the past. I can’t turn back time and stop myself from doing what I did. I won’t expect forgiveness, but I’d like it if I could stand at my locker and not get randomly cold-clocked.”
“I can work with you on that, Anthony.”
“My friends call me Tony.”
“Let’s stay with proper names right now, Anthony.”
We arrived at the classroom door.
Anthony stopped and allowed me to go in first. He was probably doing that in order to stare at my ass.