Gwen Brown

Taking up drinking?

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So, I am thinking of taking up drinking on a limited basis.

I like yellow IPA Beer

I do not like Wine but once found 1972 Gewurztraminer to be pleasant.

The very few times I tried the hard stuff, Yukkk !!! Double Yuk. It tasted like cough syrup.

So, I like Licorice, and I like Molasses. Maybe something that is thick and nice and sweet and to be drank in a snifter? But not to get drunk on.

Finally decided that organized religion is for the simple, so just want to kill the pain a little. If someone wanted to bug me some ...?

MtF Transgender Endocrinology

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I would be very interested to hear what young transgender folk are experiencing in terms of Endocrinology. For the people in my generation and almost as old, some of us experience almost no breast growth, even post SRS. For me, breast growth has been rather generous, and I suspect that is due to variations in genetics ???

I just read a story about a young woman in Austrailia who has persuaded the authorities that only she and her Doctor need to be involved in her life and not the Judge.

Story Characterization

I was walking through a Safeway grocery store today, browsing for the ingredients to put in a nice stew. The store is in Clatskanie, Oregon, and I was on the way home from a sanity break at Astoria at the beach. It is a quaint little town along the Columbia River, in the center of Commercial Logging country. I've been living in the city for so long I must look completely like a city girl, like totally.

Perhaps there is hope for us ?

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I was at my little brother's house and we were talking about stuff while he had me trouble shooting his vacuum cleaner. Out of the blue, he stopped talking and looked lost for a minute. Then he said, "My Grandson is Transgendered". He then revealed that he (she) is 5 years old. He told me that the child's mother, my brother's daughter, said that they had been through the Doctor, Shrinks and endless sessions of telling the child that they were not going anywhere until HE put on the right clothes, until it became obvious that this was not just a passing fancy on the child's part.

Taking malicious advantage of others.

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I started coming to this site around 2006, though did not publish until 2007. I was extremely shattered and emotive, but through the support of those at this site and the release of "Telling My Truth" somehow managed to avoid suicide. Many of those old souls that were here no longer are, for what reason I do not know.

The fact is those of us who remain are going to lose this site if we do not pull a finger out. I don't give two shits about any excuses.

Help out or lose this site.

Spanked by her boss

Before someone goes into a Feminist rant, please consider the source, and the fact that she has never claimed to be respectable.

I was just reading an article about a female reporter working for an Alabama Newspaper who was apparently spanked by her then boss at the paper, in 1975.

No Seriously.

NO, Seriously, "You Sit Crazy", really is from a dream I had this morning and I woke up laughing about it! The only other time I woke up laughing was after a lovingly and properly administered spanking, and it took a couple weeks for me to get over it. :)

This is the fastest turn around from inspiration to publishment (is that a word?) I have ever had. Just a little under 5 hours! What a ride !!!

That chocolate cake must have been nearly lethal.

Gwen

You Sit Crazy

You Sit Crazy
By
Gwen Brown

This story is the transcription of a dream that I had early this morning. It is likely the product of a demented mind, or perhaps it was too much chocolate cake? Almost all of this is from that dream. No, seriously.

The BEST Movie

The Title is in Russian Cyrillic, with Chinese and bad English subtitles, so I can't interpret. I hope that there are enough Sci Fi fanatics out there that will have the persistence to work at understanding this movie. Human first contact with aliens will go something like this, I hope, but better perhaps?

SRS, The Saga Continues

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In my continuing reading about Sexual Reassignment Surgery and peripheral matters, I've had a rather astonishing revelation. I was reading an article in "theBMJ" , more correctly "The British Medical Journal", where one contributor stated rather matter of factly that the recipients of SRS surgery routinely had their Prostate removed. This statement illustrated rather conclusively that "professionals" functioning outside their area of expertise sometimes have rather profound gaps in their knowledge base to the point that it is laughable to me.

SRS, The Nitty Gritty

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A while back I got in a discussion about SRS on Youtube and a man commented on it. I wound up having an email exchange with him that led to a phone conversation. He was nice enough and said that he is a surgeon that has done the operation. He challenged me on one aspect of my operation. My Surgeon in Bangkok told me that he did the normal penile inversion technique, and attached one of my Vas Deferens tubes to the back end of my neo Vagina to provide Vaginal lubrication. My Neo Vagina is always moist and has the fragrance of Estrogen; sometimes leaving a white stain in my panties.

Psychosis

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I do a lot of reading in Anthropology, Astronomy, Psychiatry, Religious History, and other things equally as mind bending.

Really focused on where Homo Sapiens came from and why we are such violent pricks? And, coming from such uber conservative religious stock, life is anything but a "funny funny riddle". This time of year is really awful.

Illogical Creatures

Aside from writing, the central focus of my life is to fully understand what it is to be a woman, so I can more faithfully render them in my stories.

I was completely astonished to attend three functions over the holidays in which I was completely treated like a woman, a sisterhood member. At no time was the fact that I might be counterfeit as a woman mentioned and it felt really good.

Prophetic Stories

In November of 2011, I published "Alien Investigators" which had some teleported aliens which were serendipitously dropped into the front yard of some Fundamentalist polygamist Mormons in southern Utah as extremely precocious human infants. The story was not intended to seem Um plausible at all. It was just a bit of loony fun. In later parts of this tale, the protagonists did some viral genetic editing to "improve" the human race.

Now, in November of 2017, someone really has done gene editing, on themselves. Now I feel like a Prophet. :)

Gwen

What the eff?

Earlier tonight "The Farm" was sitting in Random Solos enticing me. I started to read it but it was so good that I had to leave to go buy some pizza and beer so I could properly enjoy it.

Upon returning I tried to get into it from Casey Brooke's page and it has 0 Bytes.

What?

Gwen

A Bit of Filthy Lucre Perhaps?

Some Filthy Lucre Perhaps?

I thought that the world situation required a bit of insanely comic relief, and I'll admit to having had some very "head banging" things happen to me; all, erm mostly, without drugs or other intoxicants.

Inquiring on the Site Demographics

Will a story that is very violent; traumatic even, do well here? Concern for possible youthful readers here gives me pause about whether it should be published on this site or at all? Not trying to rationalize an excuse for writing it, just being open.

About Gwen Brown

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I am writing this to explain my actions of the last months. The reason for the delay was to let my feelings settle so I have a reasonable expectation that I would not be saying anything rash and hurting feelings.

It seems clear now that I am finished writing as Gwen Brown. In the unlikely event that someone would want to use any of my ideas or story devices, just contact me at [email protected].

To Mormons and Xmos

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I have exchanged emails and PMs with at least 4 other Mormon or Xmo authors here and this is really to them, only. I was initially exposed to the Mormons in March 2011, and had some very healing years with them. I do not want to forget the good the local members did me.

In November 2015, it all began to tank with their ill advised announcement aimed at the children of same sex marriages, and I almost quit then but I vainly believed that eventually in the face of devotion and a sense of morality, they would change.

Horizon Zero Dawn

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I am NOT a gamer on any media, though I have been watching some Youtube videos of Horizon Zero Dawn, #1 so far, and it is about the most visually appealing one I have seen. There is not a bunch of grunting guys and combat. :)

Last night I was looking at what it might cost to get setup, and the Ps4 is $400, a 48" TV is about $400 and the game is about $60. One of those goggle things is about $400. That is a lot for fritter ware. Would the goggle thing replace the TV?

Is it worth it getting into games or should I just go on a nice hike?

Gwen

Watch for computer attacks

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I typically have at least one of three 1 TB usb drives plugged into my computer, and at night I generally just put it to sleep. This morning when I got up, I had no internet connection according to the message on my screen. My IP provider was able to help me badger my computer to work again but all IP addresses had to be re-entered manually.

This evening as I am watching a movie on youtube, I noticed file explorer open, but was able to shut that activity down. This after running malware bites this afternoon. Malware bites uncovered nothing.

USB Wifi Adapter

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I have a 32 inch, curved screen HP, "Envy" and recently found out that the particular type of screen excitation they use is very hard on the eyes, and I can verify that I have been having eye comfort issues.

I still have my 7 year old Dell, XPS 430 which was working fine when I shut it off. The issue was that it really did not like win10, so I rather naively thought the machine to be obsolete. However, the last word I got from the MS Technician is that they cajoled it into running on win10, but that was after I had already gotten the new 'puter.

Terror or Sorrow

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I have a visitor in my house that does not know I am ____, and I am not planning to tell on myself. I met this man on Arabnews 11 years ago in a discussion about women driving in Saudi Arabia, and he showed himself to be a good and sympathetic man. He has 5 sisters and decided that he would like a break from being chauffeur, but it is too dangerous for women to drive there because the men are such nasty, aggressive drivers.

Leftenant or Lieutenant ???

When I was writing and publishing "Lieutenant Katia in Afghanistan", there was quite a discussion about my use of "Leftenant" in the story, so I finally corrected it to be what the majority wanted. I am just now watching "Corvette K-225" made in 1943 and they are speaking the word Leftenant. I have no idea if the movie was made in the US, Canada, or the UK.

So there. Tongue sticking out >>> :)

Smartly

Gwen

Remembering or Flashbacks?

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I drove up to a wildlife refuge out of boredom on a road that I did not think I had been on and as soon as I got off the freeway and headed west, things began to seem familiar, and a bit down the road, I saw a farm with a very tall board fence surrounding the yard. As I passed it, the full memory suddenly went off in my brain like a burning meteorite; making it feel like it was burning a trail through my grey matter. I KNEW that place!

A Natural Flirt?

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I was talking with a couple from the church yesterday, and realized I was flirting with him. "So, no spanking for what I have done?", I said.

His wife and I are good friends. No one seemed offended. Yet, I was strongly feeling the need to be punished, even spanked. When I understood what I had been doing, wow, how can so much hot blood get into my face ???

From now on I will BE a Nun around him.

Gwen

Plagarism ???

I have been reading "Fluidity in Space" by JenniBee and a story I have been working on for years has a chapter that comes very close to what might appear to be plagiarism. As I told her, I don't have an issue with this but do not want someone in the future crying foul when I publish mine, perhaps this summer.

I would appreciate suggestions on how we should proceed.

Gwen

Preserving Original Publishing Date.

Tonight I am getting ready to share a link on "Easy As Falling Of A Bike" with a friend who is looking for something to read, so I had to dig deeply to find Chapter 1 of said epic. I notice that something had happened with it and the publication date was now 2015. Chapter 2 still says 2007. I have noticed the same thing has happened with certain of my stories, not that mine are important at all.

Living as a woman without surgery

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It seems to me that I have heard of males living as women without any surgery, or hormones at all and not being intersex who have had successful lives. One case I heard of had cross dressed as a youth and as soon as they got in college changed to full time. I hope they have or had happy lives and that eventually that is how we will all do it. Of course, for an intact male, there is that troublesome masculinization, so I know they must have done something along the way.

Playing with Languages

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Over the years I've been exposed to numbers of different cultures and it has been fun to learn what I could about their idioms and accents. It was interesting to learn something about the Thai culture, their way of writing and their accents. To me their writing seems oddly similar to Hebrew, not that I know anything mind you.

Stories That Are Prophetic

I have two stories (books ?) that I have been working on for years, one of them I started in the early 80's on an Electric Typewriter. Lately, I have begun to see parts of both of them begin to come true in real life, and that frightens me because I think that my health will not hold out long enough to finish either. Sadly, the only people I would trust to finish them are not likely to outlive me by much if at all.

Prostate Removal During SRS

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In a conversation I just had with an ER Doctor, he asked me if during my SRS surgery, had the surgeon removed my Prostate Gland? Back in 2007, when mine was done, I do not think they were doing that because it was felt that the proceedure was too dangerous to the nerves and blood vessels.

Apparently some or all surgeons are now doing it orthoscopically as a part of SRS. Are any of you aware if this change in surgical procedure has been implemented or is the ER Doctor wrong?

Gwen

NO Pants !!!

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In talking with my Doctor, he finally sussed out that I am not a genetic female, much to my surprise that it took him this long. I've been very ill the last two months with Pneumonia, a UTI and intestinal flare ups.

In talking to me about ways to prevent more Urinary Tract Infections, he said to avoid pants, pantyhose, leggings and to use only cotton panties; none of the pretty stuff. He further recommended a full shower after riding my bike, even casually, and no baths; showers only. He also said to use baby wipes after every trip to the loo.

9 years 11 months

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In the last day or so, the clicker thingie clunked over to 11 months so before Christmas I'll be at 10 years here. I remember it quite well. I was still very nutty from the divorce 2 years earlier, and being on huge doses of VA psych medications for PTSD. I'd previously published some stories over on Storysite, when I was approached either by Sephrina or Cathy; can't remember which. I was very messed up and broken at the time and spending time locked up in a secure cell at the VA every few months.

Really, really ill

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In the nearly 10 years since my SRS, I have had many Urinary Tract Infections to the point that at my next Doctor's visit, I plan to talk about getting my Neo-Vagina removed. Because of my Amish conditioning perhaps, I have never gotten my head around having sex with a male outside of a lawful marriage, so it has had no use outside of my plastic bf. My hypothesis is that due to lack of use, germs build up in there and indirectly provide the source of the UTI germs.

I also plan to discuss the use of Lavage to perhaps keep that more clean.

I do not plan to live as a man.

Story Inspiration

Practicing some radical distraction, I was cruising YouTube when I found an hour long video of "Similarillion", a JRR Tolkien story about the beginning of all things. I was actually quite lovely. Then moving on I found a series of beautiful and astonishing videos by Skyrim that were so impressive to me. How do they write the code to do that and then to make the figures move so realistically? Then the scum on the bottom included some Rape Fantasy videos, apparently many countries outlaw them, but it does not seem like America does. :(

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