Who Takes Care of Cheshire’s Place?

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Keala pulls into the driveway of Cheshire’s place. She turns her car off and heads towards the front door. She pulls her cellphone out and looks up the special number Cheshire gave her a long time ago. She dials the number and the electronic lock built into the door unlocks.

She’s greeted by two tiger strips cats “hi, Kit and Kat.” She pets each one on their head.

Keala makes sure the front door is closed behind her as she walks past them. Kit and Kat like to go exploring. She found that out the second time she watched after Cheshire’s place. The twins managed to get by her and caused her to chase them around the neighborhood.

“Come on guys, it’s breakfast time.” Keala heads towards the storage room where Cheshire keeps the food bowls.

She gets Kit and Kat’s bowl and fills them up with the proper amount of food. Cheshire has the twins on a special diet and wants to keep them on it. Keala links her cellphone up to the house blue tooth system and plays music from her phone as she heads outside to feed Simba and Shur-Khan.

“Shur-Khan, it's breakfast time.” Keala prepares Shur-Khan’s food bowl.

A smile appears on her face as he comes walking out of the forest. She spots Simba walking behind him.

“There’s my favorite boy.” Keala liked Simba a lot. She has seen him grow since Cheshire gave him to Tizzy.

Tizzy was like an older sister to her, and Cheshire was like a mother to her. Cheshire had rescued her from a bad situation. A situation she got herself into, because of a bad choice.

While Shur-Khan and Simba were eating, she grabs the grooming kit from storage. She knew both her favorite boys loved having their fur groomed. When Shur-Khan finishes his breakfast. She starts on him first. At first, she uses to fear him, but afterward once Cheshire made her spend time with him. He got uses to her and she got uses to him.

Once Shur-Khan was groomed and feed. She sends him on his way. She moves to Simba and hugs him. Simba was her favorite. Sure, Shur-Khan was the oldest and the biggest, but she liked Simba a lot. Once, Simba was groomed. She sends him off into the jungle. Since Tizzy’s new place connected to Cheshire’s. Simba could go from the fenced-in area and go into Cheshire’s property.

Keala cleans up Shur-Khan and Simba’s feeding dishes. She refreshes their water trough. Cheshire likes for their water to be fresh. Once she was done with the cats, she heads back into the house and start freshening up Cheshire’s house.

Cheshire has told her that she doesn’t need to do the bedrooms, but she didn’t mind doing them. Any dirty laundry Cheshire and her family left, she takes care of that. Keala checks the refrigerator and tosses out anything that had expired. She knew Cheshire always marked any leftovers, so she can keep things from spoiling.

Once the house is clean, she checks Shur-Khan and Simba one more time. She makes sure Kit and Kat are in the house as well. Once she clears everything, she locks the place up and heads out. She’ll have to be back later in the day to feed the twins, Shur-Khan and Simba.

Keala heads back to her car and drives to her next appointment. The next house belonged to a banker. She goes about cleaning the place up. His place wasn’t that bad, and it didn’t take her long to do. When she finishes his place, she moves on to her next appointment.

Most of her morning she had easy house cleaning jobs. It wasn’t until after lunch, she regretted the next job. When Keala arrives at the house and went inside the place. It was a huge mess. There was trash, vomit, articles of clothing, and other things scattered all over the place.

Keala stops just inside the foyer, watching where she is standing. She couldn’t believe the mess as she surveys everything.

“I am going to charge this client triple my rate. They didn’t say anything about this level of mess.” Keala goes back out to her car and grabs her specialized equipment.

She suits up and heads back inside the house. She starts picking up the mess. She listens to her music playlist as she works. She starts dancing to the different songs as she goes from one room to the next room. By the time she is finished cleaning the place up. It was late in the evening.

Keala looks at the place, just before she leaves for the day. She had one more stop to make and then she could head home. She gathers her stuff up and takes them out to her car. Once the car was repacked, she heads back to Cheshire’s to take care of her favorite cats.

On the way to Cheshire’s, she stops at her favorite restaurant to buy some dinner. She hasn’t eaten anything all day long and if Cheshire found out she hasn’t been eating as she should. Cheshire would punish her big time. She pulls up to Kahiki and heads inside after parking.

Kahiki’s was Keala’s favorite restaurant. She orders her favorite dish, which was crunchy Polynesian pork salad. Once she has her dinner, she heads back to Cheshire’s.

Before she sits down to eat, she feeds the twins and her two favorite kitty cats. She knew Shur-Khan and Simba get cranky if they aren’t fed on time. Keala turns the television on and looks for a good program to watch while she is eating.

Keala spends the night sleeping on the sofa at Cheshire’s place. She doesn’t want to get up when her alarm goes off on her cellphone. She feels one of the twins down at her feet. She sits up and reaches down to scratch whoever it was.

Keala’s bladder forces her to get up and head to the bathroom. She was glad that Cheshire didn’t mind her spending the night at her place when she took care of it. After doing her morning business, she goes about taking care of all the kitty cats.

When she is done taking care of the cats, Keala hops into the shower. She spends twenty to thirty minutes in the shower. She was glad that Cheshire had a nice hot water heater.

She looks at the twins when she gets out “sorry guys. I can’t stay and play today. I have several jobs lined up that I have to go and do.”

Keala gets dressed in her work clothes and heads out to her car. She really needs to upgrade to an SUV or maybe a van. She heads towards her first job.

Her first job was in a nice place that belonged to a nice couple. They had four children and were active in the community. She didn’t have to do much to the place. The parents made the children pick up after themselves.

She does some light dusting and vacuuming. If they have any dirty dishes, she runs the dishwasher for them. Laundry was the same thing. She does the laundry as well and leaves it folded up on the bed of each child’s room.

Once she leaves that place, she has an hour or so to kill before her next appointment. She changes into her bikini and takes her surfboard out of storage. It’s been a while since she has been out on her board.

She paddles out into the ocean and waits for a good wave. Once she spots it, she catches it and rides it in, without falling off. She brushes her wet hair out of her eyes and paddles back out to catch another one. As she is waiting for the wave, she looks around her and notices she doesn’t recognize any of the other surfers. She wonders whatever happened to the guys she grew up with and surf with.

Another wave builds and she catches it and rides it in. She was surprised that she hasn’t fallen off her board after five years in prison. She knew she shouldn’t have done what she did, but she was desperate for money, and she had no choice in the matter. If it hadn’t been for
Cheshire sparing her life and proving she didn’t kill the Naval Intelligence officer. She would have ended up spending the rest of her life in prison.

As it was, she had been charged with a Class C felony. She had stolen several valuable necklaces and matching earrings that were worth forty thousand dollars. As for the naval officer, he was killed by his best friend. He had been sleeping with the guy’s wife when the guy was on deployment.

She had been framed by the guy. Somehow her fingerprints had ended up on the murder weapon and the gun residue had been found on her clothes and hands. Cheshire had been investigating the case as a favor to the guy’s father.

Cheshire had cleared her of the murder charge but made her pay for the stolen items. While she was in jail, Cheshire visited her and made sure she was okay. When she got out of jail, she learned Cheshire had adopted Tizzy. Cheshire still took her under her wing and taught her certain skills. She also helped her start her cleaning business.

Keala catches a few more waves before she gets out and rinses off. She had an apartment that belonged to Cheshire that she needed to get to. Once she was dressed, she heads towards the apartment. She uses her master key for all of Cheshire’s properties to unlock the door.

When she walks into the apartment, she notices that someone was living in the apartment. She looks around and finds out that a blonde hair woman was living in the apartment. She has seen the picture of the woman before, she couldn’t remember where she saw the picture.

She’ll text Cheshire later to find out who the woman was and if the place was still to be cleaned. She makes sure anything she moves she puts
back where it was. She does any dirty laundry the person owns and notices there were some male clothes in the laundry as well.

As she moves about the place, she figures the person must be in the movie business with all the posters, special effects gear, and mask. She picks one mask up and tries it on. It was a monster mask and fit her small head pretty well.

Keala takes a selfie of herself wearing the mask. She’ll have to show Cheshire the picture, as she puts the mask back. She goes through the refrigerator and throws out anything that has gone bad and washes any dishes the stuff is in. She always goes the extra step for Cheshire.

Once the apartment is cleaned, she heads towards her next appointment. It was a condo and was nice. It only needed light dusting and vacuuming. As Keala is cleaning the place, her business cellphone starts ringing. She looks at the id of the caller and notices it was her friend Lt. Jeff Best.

“Hey, Lt. what can I do for you?” Keala wonders what her friend wanted.

“Keala, do you have time today to go to a resident when we are done and clean the place up?” Lt. Best knew Keala was good at cleaning and patching up crime scenes.

“Sure, give me the address. You know I’m going to charge the department a little extra for this.” Keala had a standard rate for cleaning up crime scenes.

“That’s fine. If you find anything that we missed, call Sergeant LaVigne.” Best knew Keala could be trusted.

“No problem. Send me the address.” Keala knew she had time to do this job and get back to Cheshire’s place.

Her cellphone beeps letting her know a text message had arrived. She looks at the address and lets out a whistle. The place was about an hour from where she was. It was also a mansion. She knew the neighborhood. She robbed a few places out in the area in her early years.

“I got the address, Lt. I’ll send you the bill.”

“Alright and thanks for doing this. Make sure you do a nice job. The place belongs to a VIP.” Best didn’t want to tell Keala who it belonged to.

“No problem.” Keala ends the phone call.

Keala finishes the apartment she is in and leaves afterward. She stops and picks up some lunch on her way to the crime scene. She was glad that she didn’t have to see the bodies or anything. She has only seen dead bodies once and she never wants to experience that again.

Keala eats her lunch on the way to the address she was given. She hopes it didn’t take her long to find the place. After an hour of driving and fifteen minutes to locate the address, she pulls up a long driveway.

“Okay, WOW! I wonder why Cheshire doesn’t own a property like this?” Keala parks her car and turns the engine off.

She gets out and heads towards the entrance. She could already spot all the police tape inside the place. She uses the access code she was given to enter the place. Keala was impressed by how beautiful the place was decorated. Now, she understood why Lt. Best wanted her to get the place back in shape.

She walks throughout the house takes inventory of what she has to do to it. There were a bunch of bullets holes, and blood everywhere. Whatever took place here was a massacre. She has never seen so much blood and bullets.

Keala stops in the last room that needed her attention and just looks at it. It looked like several people had been killed and it looked like a woman about her height and build was one of them.

“Well, I better get to work.” Keala turns around and head back out to her car and grab everything she was going to need.

She starts in the last bedroom where someone had been murder. She cleans that room and moves on to the next room. When she gets to the Master bedroom, there were bullets holes she had to take care of. As she is taking care of them, she discovers the room didn’t seem right to her.

Keala taps along the walls and finds a hidden door. She manages to find the trigger to open it. As the door opens, she discovers that it was a hidden panic room, and inside were weapons, money, and a server.

“I think I better call Lt. Best about this.” She doesn’t touch anything.

She dials Lt. Best’s phone number.

Lt. Best was still at his desk when his cellphone starts ringing. He looks at the caller information and notices it was Aloha Cleaning Service. He presses accept “Keala, what’s the problem?”

“I don’t know if this is good news or bad news, but you better get yourself and your IT person down here. This place has a panic room and it recorded everything that happened.” Keala was watching where the hidden cameras were.

“Don’t touch anything, Keala. I’ll be to you as fast as I can.” Lt. Motions for his partner to join him.

“Alright, I’m going on cleaning the rest of the place until you get here.” Keala closes the room up.

She ends the phone call and goes about cleaning the rest of the place. The last room she had to clean, was the person's home office. As she was cleaning the room and around the desk. Something catches her eye. There was a panel on the desk leg that didn’t look right.

It piqued her curiosity. She knows she should leave it alone, but she couldn’t. She fiddles around with the secret compartment and manages to open it. When she opens the hidden compartment, she discovers a black and silver thumb drive.

She knew there weren’t any hidden cameras in this room. The owner didn’t want what went on in here to be recorded. She holds the thumb drive and wonders what is on it. After a few seconds, she slides the thumb drive into a pocket on her cleaning suit and finishes the room up.

By the time Keala was putting everything away. Lt. Best and his partner show up, along with the IT person.

“You’re just in time. I just got done cleaning the last room.” Keala looks at the Lt. and his partner.

Lt. Best and his partner, Lt. Brooker look at Keala. She looked no older than a teenager and stood about 4’11” tall. She had straight shoulder-length black hair and hazel eyes. She could easily pass as a high school student.

“Why don’t you show me and my partner that hidden panic room.” Lt. Best couldn’t believe they and the forensics team had missed it.

“It’s upstairs in the Master bedroom.” Keala leads the way to the bedroom.

“Look outside the bedroom and then inside and tell me what’s wrong.” Keala stands and watches Lt. Best and his partner as they do what she suggested.

When they look back inside the bedroom at Keala “the room should be bigger in here and it isn’t.” Lt. Brook walks over towards the wall and taps on it.

Lt. Best looks at Keala “how did you find it?”

“I was patching up the bullets holes in the wall when I discovered it.” Keala had sat down on the edge of the bed and watched Lt. Brook.

After a few knocks, he finds the pressure point to open the hidden door. It swings inward and walks into the hidden room. Lt. Best walks in behind his partner.

“I believe the killer was recorded. I didn’t touch anything, so I don’t know.” Keala made sure not to touch the computer attached to the server.

The IT person that came with Lt. Best and his partner walks over and starts accessing the server. Keala watches for a little while as the killers come up on the screen. As she thought, there were no images from the office where she found the thumb drive.

“Well, if you don’t need me anymore. I’m going to go home and feed some kitty cats.” Keala turns to leave.

“What type of cats do you own, Keala?” Mr. Brooks was curious.

“They aren’t my cats. They belong to a client of mine, but to answer your question, two Ligers and identical-looking Snow Leopards.”

“Who owns those cats?” Mr. Brooks was wondering what a Liger was and who would own one.

“Can’t tell you, but I do know my client has permits to own them.” Keala knew Cheshire had all the proper paper works to own her kitty cats.

“That’s one brave person.” Lt. Brooks couldn’t believe someone would own whatever a Liger is.

“See you guys later and keep the mess down.” Keala grabs what was left of her stuff and takes it out to her car.

Keala felt kind of guilty about not reporting the thumb drive, but she was curious about it. She stops at a burger joint on the way back to Cheshire’s place. When she arrives, she feeds the twins first, so they don’t steal her dinner, and afterward, the big kitty cats.

While they are eating, Keala pulls out her laptop and plugs the thumb drive into it. The drive itself required a password. She looks at it and tries the obvious password first. She tries a second obvious password and gets nothing. She stands up and paces back and forth thinking about what it could be. She knew several hackers that could crack the password, but she didn’t trust them to keep their mouths shut.

An idea pops into her head and she sits down and runs the Cane and Able password cracker program she owns. After a few tries, it breaks the password.

“Now, let’s see what secrets you have.” Keala starts looking at the information.

She couldn’t believe she had hit a massive jack pop. The file contained secret bank account numbers that were hidden in several different banks. She had all the information she needs to transfer the funds from those accounts to any account she wanted to.

“No wonder that guy and his family were killed.” Keala slumps back against the sectional she was sitting on.

She could close her business and live off of just one of the accounts. She could donate the rest of the money from the other accounts to different organizations. The problem was the US government would want to know where she suddenly acquired all this money. They track big amounts of money.

“I need to talk with Cheshire about this. She would know what I should do.” Keala trusted Cheshire’s judgment.

She resets the password on the thumb drive and hides it in a vase on Cheshire’s bookcase. No one would be dumb enough to try to break into Cheshire’s place. The last person she heard about that tried, ended up becoming Shur-Khan’s plaything.

She eats her dinner and takes a nice relaxing shower. She wishes she had a boyfriend or even a girlfriend to have some meaningless sex with. The problem was when most people found out what she does for a living, it was a turn-off to them.

She just plays with herself while she is in the shower. Once her sexual urges have been satisfied. She heads back into the living room and sends a text to Cheshire to contact her. Keala covers up a yawn and lays down on the sofa, after a few minutes. She was hoping to hear from Cheshire, but she doesn’t.

The next morning, Keala gets up and feeds the cats and grooms them, before her first job. She looks at how many appointments she has for the day.

“I’m going to be busy, today.” Keala doubles her supplies.

Keala locates where the Holey Grail Donuts food truck is and grabs a few donuts to eat. She buys a dozen to take with her, because of how many appointments she has lined up. Throughout the day she bounces from one appointment to another appointment. She doesn’t have time to stop for lunch, so she munches on the donuts she bought.

Occasionally, she thinks someone is following her. However, when she looks in her mirror to see who might be following her. She doesn’t spot anyone following her. She pulls into the driveway of her next client.

The rest of the day, she continues doing her job. By the time she gets back to Cheshire’s place. She is feeling extremely tired. She feeds the cats and takes a shower afterward, to get all the chemical smells off her body.

When she steps out of the bathroom, in just a towel. She spots two men dressed in black and wearing black hoods over their heads.

“Where is it?”

“Where’s what?” Keala looks at the men.

“The drive. We know you, have it?” The bigger of the two men look at Keala for an answer.

“I have no idea what you are talking about. Also, do you know whose house this is that you have broken into?” Keala knew most people knew who lived here.

“I don’t give a damn whose house this is. I want that thumb drive now. You were the only one in the house that could have found it.”

“Well, since you don’t care who lives here. I’m going to feel sorry for you when she finds out.”

“Give us that damn, drive!” The second guy standing next to the bigger one leaps towards Keala.

Keala takes her towel off and twirls it. She snaps it in the face of the guy charging her. The tip of the towel hits its mark and blood squirts out. She snaps it a second time and hits the guy in his eyes.

The bigger guy charges towards Keala and tries to grab her. She spins out of the way and kicks him in the stomach. She strikes him in the upper part of his arm like Cheshire taught her.

The bigger guy felt the strike to his arm and loses feeling in it. The kick to his stomach didn’t affect him that much.

“What did you do to me?” The bigger guy looks towards Keala’s naked body.

“I disabled you. Now, I’m going to pretend this didn’t happen and not tell the owner of this house what happened. If you and your partner leave now and never come back. If you don’t and want to continue this, I have two big cats outside that will be happy to have fresh meat. If you don’t believe me, look behind you.” Keala spotted Kit and Kat standing behind the men.

The smaller of the two men turns around and spotted two identical spotted cats watching them. They looked like they were ready to attack.

“Oh, by the way. Their big brothers are outside and will be happy to entertain you.” Keala just watches the two men.

“This isn’t over, bitch.” The smaller guy with blood coming out of his nose, sneer at Keala.

“Now, you had to go and spoil it.” Keala strikes out fast and knocks the smaller guy out.

Before the bigger guy could react, she knocks the bigger guy out. She was going to hate doing this, but she needed to make a point. She hopes Cheshire won’t be mad at her.

Keala borrows a pair of Omphile’s shorts and t-shirt and drags both men out of the house. When she gets the men outside. She removes their mask and takes pictures of their faces. She can ask Cheshire to run their faces. She ties the men up and hoists them up in the air.

There was a tree outside in the backyard, Tizzy and Cheshire use to torture the people they catch. She picks up a bucket of water and tosses it onto both men.

“Wakey, wakey!” As she stands there and watches them.

Both men wake up and look at the woman they came to kill. They noticed they were suspended up off the ground, hanging from a tree.

“Now, I was going to be nice to you two. However, you had to go and spoil it by calling me a bitch.”

“Who are you?” The shorter guy looks at Keala and waiting for her to answer.

“I’m just a cleaning maid. I clean up other people’s messes.” A smile appears on Keala’s face.

“We want that thumb drive. We know you have it.” Simone looks at Keala.

“What’s on this thumb drive?”

“That’s none of your business.” The bigger guy, Trent looks at Keala.

“Well, since you won’t tell me what is on it and since I don’t have this thumb drive you are talking about. I think it's time you learn your lesson coming after me and invading my client’s house.” Keala turns and looks out into the forest.

Trent and Simone look out into the forest behind them. They wonder what this woman was about to do.

“Shur-Khan, Simba, here kitty, kitty,” Keala calls out to the forest on Cheshire’s property.

The two men watch as two big cats come walking out of the forest. Both cats looked like they would enjoy playing with them. The woman they noticed wasn’t scared of the two big cats.

Keala walks towards the boys and pets them. She looks at the two men as she stands between both huge cats “now, are you going to be nice and leave me alone? Or do I need to turn these two fine gentlemen loose and let them sharpen their claws and teeth on you?”

Simone and Trent look at each other. They turn to look at Keala “we better not hear anything about you finding that thumb drive.”

“Look, I’m done with that house. Now, are you going to leave me alone or do I let these fine boys have fun?” Keala pets Shur-Khan and Simba between their ears.

“We’ll leave you alone. Now, let us down.”

“Okay, but once you’re down, you better run away. Shur-Khan is territorial about his territory.” Keala walks over to the tree and cuts the men down.

She looks at them “I would start running now.” An evil smile forms on her cute face.

Trent and Simone run back towards the house and through it, with the cats hot on their heels. Keala takes her time as she walks into the house and watches as both men run out the front door. She rushes over and closes it before Kit and Kat decide to go exploring.

Keala looks at Shur-Khan and Simba “some people just don’t appreciate big cats, boys.” As Keala hugs both cats.

She cleans up whatever mess the men made coming into Cheshire’s house. She gives each of the cats, their favorite treats. Keala knew Cheshire makes the treats herself.

“You kitty cats, were good today.” As Keala feeds each cat their treats.

Keala covers up a yawn as she prepares to lay down on the sofa again. She makes sure Shur-Khan and Simba are outside, and the twins are inside. Once everyone is where they are supposed to be. She lays down on the sofa and falls asleep.

The next few days, Keala spends at the beach surfing, after her run-in with those guys. She does hear through the grapevine on the third day. That those men were found dead. That cleaning contract went to someone else, instead of her.

Keala didn’t mind, because she had enough contract work to keep her busy. One night, while picking up some food to take back to Cheshire’s place. She is approached by a tall dark gentleman.

“Excuse me, miss. But are you Keala Kono?” The man looks at Keala.

“Yes, I am. What can I do for you?” Keala looks at the well-built guy. He looked like he was in his early forties.

“You did happen to come across a silver and black thumb drive while you were cleaning at a certain mansion, did you?” Donny watches Keala’s eyes.

“Nope! Not at all. You are the second person to ask me about a thumb drive from that address.” Keala noticed the guy was watching her facial expressions and eyes.

She was taught by the best at the art of lying. Also, she knew when someone was watching how she reacted as well.

“You said that I’m the second person to ask you about a thumb drive? Who were the first ones to ask you about it?” Donny wonders who else knew about it.

“These two men.” Keala shows the pictures of the two men she took, while also taking his picture as well.

Donny looks at the picture of the two men he recently killed. He looks back at Keala “you say these two men ask you as well?”

“Yes.”

“How come they didn’t kill you?” Donny wanted to know that answer.

A smile appears on Keala’s face “because I work for The Cheshire, and she would be very upset if something should happen to me.”

Donny almost flinched when he hears that name. He knew who The Cheshire was and what she was capable of doing to someone. Also, unless you spoke to her first, before killing one of her people. She would come after you.

“Very well. Do you happen to know how I can get in touch with her?” Donny wanted to speak with Cheshire about something.

“Here’s her private number. If she doesn’t answer, just leave a message and she will contact you.” Keala hands the guy one of Cheshire’s business cards.

On the front of the card was the Disney version of the Cheshire and on the back was just a number. She hands it to the gentleman.

“Here you go, sir.”

“Thank you.” Donny accepts it.

Donny puts the card in his pants pocket and turns around to leave. He’ll ask the Cheshire if Keala Kono works for her. He fades into the crowd and disappears.

Keala watches as the guy walks away from her. That thumb drive brought out all the weirdos. Maybe she should transfer the information to a different drive and toss that one in the ocean? She stops at a dollar store and buy a black and red one that held as much information as the silver one.

When she gets back to Cheshire’s place, later in the evening. She transfers the information to the drive she bought. She wipes the other drive clear of all information and runs a strong magnet over it. She might be able to sneak back into the mansion where she got it from.

Keala waits until late and takes the thumb drive back to the mansion and puts it back where it was. She made sure to clean it, so none of her fingerprints and skin cells were on it. This way, no one would know it has been messed with.

Once Keala has replaced the drive, back where it was. She heads back to Cheshire’s place for some sleep. She hopes Cheshire will be home soon.

While Keala waits for Cheshire’s return. She continues to do what she has been hired for.

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Comments

A Big Cat's employee

Samantha Heart's picture

NEVER mess with the big cat's employee... At least ONE person knows who Cheshire is & how dangerous she is & knew to back off tell he talks to the cat her self.

Love Samantha Renée Heart.

Stupid Girl

She's playing way over her head. She never should have taken the drive in the first place.. It'll take Cheshire to dig her out of the hole she's dug for herself.


"Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.”
George Carlin