So my situation isn't brilliant but the help is starting to happen, or at least tiny steps towards proper help.

My daughter had been allowed time off school this morning but it wouldn't have achieved anything o she went in and had breakfast in the canteen, the school has allowed free meals for her in the interim. As she didn't have access to her phone charger one of the staff arranged charging facilities. I had a job this morning, whilst it wouldn't be a priority it did generate some cash for the one hour I was there (idiot locked himself out of Windows 10 machine).

Hi everyone.

Surgery went fine. It's been 6 hours since I was wheeled in. I'm not in and pain and I find that strange.

Hehe. Feels nice to be able to put my legs together without pinching things

They're keeping me overnight to check my breathing. Going home tomorrow morning.

Dayna

Well, gee. . .

it has really been three years. Time flies when you really don't have much to mark its passing. Saw my name in one of the blog posts today. logged on to my account (took me three tries to remember the password!) to reply and saw I had two unread messages - both over a year old.

Unacceptable.

My sincere and heartfelt apologies for my inattentiveness. As a much younger man was taught to say, "No Excuse, Sir/Ma'am."

Life is bigger, too bigger for me right now. Why is it that the "50 Shades" trilogy makes so much sense to me; that I see myself in Anna, Christian and his subbies? Why do I vainly hope for that good ending? Why do I inwardly "rage against the dying of the light"? I've been tasked with writing a letter, my final appeal to a group of men that I have little respect for, and further my friends ask me to not be insolent and sassy, and disrespectful. They tell me that even if this last effort fails, at least it will benefit those behind me.

The black cloud of depression has gone away.

Thank you to all who encouraged me during this down spot.

Quite an active weekend despite I think having a continuing UTI which gets uncomfortable to painful at times and can be embarrassing as well especially if I don't make the loo in time. On Sunday which was a beautifully sunny and warm out of the cool breeze, I visited with a few others of the mammal group to one of the committee members garden which also happens to be a nature reserve. They have dormice in their hedgerow, which was why I was there along with the others hoping to see some.

So I consider myself rather efficient in keeping healthy. I try to eat right, exercise (maybe too much). Sometimes I have issues sleeping, but it always seems to be "enough" when I get it. Over the years I've adopted too many feminine beauty regimens to register myself on the male side of the gender spectrum.

not my best night last night. Had a panic attack, then panicked over the panic attack (so like a panic attack squared), and just after lunch my knee almost gave way on me.

On the other hand, I am alive, I am home safe, and I am loved.

I have been trying to finish the next chapter of Mercy, but I am fighting against being physically and emotionally drained.

I hope to have it done soon, though.

Sorry its taking so long.

As if I didn't have enough on my plate at the moment, apparently Sharon has gone insane.

On Saturday she was with my mom and spotted a cop talking to a woman at a bus stop. She jumped out of the car and got in the officer's face, even though she didn't know the woman, the officer, or the situation.

Frankly, she was lucky he didn't arrest her.

From what my mom told me, she has been taken off her blood pressure meds, which maybe why this happened, but still, she needs to get a handle on her impulse control, or she or my daughter will get hurt.

Well, today is a special day.

It's Jaci's (AKA Tels) birthday!

Yes, the originator of all the girly germs on many chat sites is having a birthday today.

And since she's having a tough time because of her period, I'm sure she'd really appreciate all the birthday huggles we can give her!

Jaci, I hope you have a happy, girly, PINK birthday!

Just wanted to wish everybody a happy Easter.

I am gonna be busy with my daughter today as it is her birthday, so everybody be good while I'm gone!

My brother just posted on Facebook, framing trans rights as "a man can just walk into a women’s change room or washroom at will"

Sighs ...

i have always had strange dreams.

Not only the night terrors I had for decades, but just plain odd dreams.

Well, last night, I had a doozy.

I dreamed that I was with a group of people being harassed by government officials when a group of tough looking men started attacking the group.

I got the idea of giving this one guy a drop-kick because I was on a platform and I figured i'd at least get his attention.

So I launched myself at him, kicked him in the face.

And I killed him.

My week was going great until Saturday morning. Then I managed to slip and fall at work, and since then my neck hurts, my tailbone hurts, I've had trouble concentrating, and I've been very shaky PTSD wise.

I'm going to the hospital to get checked out ...

I've recently been kind of engrossed with the whole idea of gender fluidity and a non binary definition of gender. I guess I've been thinking about these things my whole life, but only recently really started reading and thinking more seriously. The political season has lots of people all fired up and the supreme court case on gay marriage has got issues of "queerness" on peoples minds. I think something that really got me thinking about issues of gender was an argument I got in at work awhile back, this was last year when Caitlyn was in the news everyday.

Well, step 2 is done so I phoned the service that actually is going the pay my pension. Got at least 2 to 3 months before they'll finish the paperwork. which means no income for March, April and probably May with the possibility of even longer. Lucky I got some savings but it's coming close to forcing my hand ...

So that's 3A. 3B is getting my name published again in the 'Belgische Staatsblad' (no clue for the englisch translation)with me being retired from the Civil Service, but I'm told that's only a formality

Still don't know the exact amount I'll be getting in hand :(.

I got called a heroine by my boss last night!

Feels pretty good !

When I started writing my story the words just flew out of me. It's going a little slower now, I still have words, but I have to wring them out. I have chapter 10 almost written, but it's taken about a week. How about a little distraction writing from my real life.

Bibliophage sent me a private message asking for me to post a status update, so I just wanted to let the community know that I'm still alive, still out here, and still writing.

Well, I just got some bad news.

My work is going to start outsourcing store cleaning to a cleaning company sometime this year, so my job will be coming to a close.

Not sure what I'm going to do, but I'm going to try my best to keep my chin up and do my best at the job in the meantime.

Prayers and hugs appreciated always.

I am well-loved by my church.

If I needed extra proof of this, I got it Sunday.

See, I went to church, but partway through the service my leg muscles decided they wanted to spasm, and my knee moved in a direction its not supposed be able to go.

I managed to suppress my yelp, but then the pastor asked if anybody had a prayer request, so I asked for prayer for the pain.

The pastor made the prayer, and the service continued, but no less than four people came over to me to check on me, to comfort me, and to offer me any help they could.

Hi all,

my daughter is about to sprog - we believe that the little joyous bundle shall be pink-coloured. So I am likely to be a grandparent in the next couple of weeks.

Which means I shall make a mad dash in the car from Switzerland to the UK soon.
And deal with the little one when I get there.

I have been trying to get the next couple of Julina episodes up and posted, but I am having a little difficulty concentrating on them at the moment.