So, I finally finished an application for subsidized housing on the south side of Edmonton for mom and me.

Being closer to Sharon and Sam would be a good thing, and maybe if my mom isn't here she wont have as much paranoia about my sister in law. (I know, unlikely, considering what dementia does, but I can hope)

Personally I have mixed feelings about leaving. I've felt safe here, which has been a rare thing for me, but the long drives are tough, and I think I can still be of some good to my mom by staying with her, or at least I hope so.

last night I had a dream that reminded me of something that actually happened.

When I was 16, we returned to Calgary after spending a year in Denver, and I was lucky enough to fall into a group of people who were into D&D, including some girls. later, in summer, two of the girls invited me to come over and spend the day with them.

As it was very hot, they soon decided to strip to their underwear, and encouraged me to do the same.

Nothing even slightly sexual happened, we just watched tv and played some games.

So last night, I dreamed I was back in school, and for some reason, after one class I was escorted around by a girl.

She was wearing a pretty black dress with rhinestones, and dark hose that was still sheer enough to show she had a tattoo on her thigh, and I was just dying of jealousy.

I woke feeling sad.

ah, well.

Does anybody know anything about making a cover letter to accompany a submission to a publisher?

any help appreciated.

I have two bits of good news to share.

1st bit of good news, I found the email of the lady who ran the local writing group, we had a good trade in emails, and I feel like I have rediscovered a friend I had lost.

2nd bit of good news, I used my new CPAP machine for the first time last night, and I only had 6.6 apnea incidents per hour. in my original sleep study I was getting 130 incidents/hour, and on my old machine I was still getting 35-40.

so yay!

I've been reading some of the other entries for the Valentine's day contest on my writing site, and all I can say is that many of the authors are as good as any major bestseller's author.

I'm just a duffer, but I feel privileged to just be in the company of such talent.

Well, it feels like its been a while since I have given a writing update, here goes:

Chapter 4 of "portal problems" is being written now. hopefully done by the end of the month.

Horror story "when paths cross" and its sequel are also being worked on. not sure how long to go.

Latest story about "Tinker Tailor Soldier Dot" is actually done, but waiting for Amethyst to be able to finish her Pinpoint story before it gets released, and a 5th story has been started.

Today I went to get tested for allergies, and I tested positive to cat hair, tree pollen, grass, and shrimp - the latter is apparently bad enough they have proscribed an epi pen for me.

But something interesting happened.

When they first gave me my results and the prescription, I noticed it had the wrong name, so I had to go back in and get things straightened out.

But what was interesting was the young woman receptionist apologized repeatedly, and I told her not to sweat it, since I got the corrected information.

My Valentine's day contest entry is up.

If you want to check it out, its here: https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/93048/customer-satisf...

I was watching "Atop the fourth wall" on Youtube, and he did a review of "the Killing Joke", which is a Batman story. The main theme of the story is the Joker believes what separates him from regular people is just one bad day.

He's wrong, of course, and I can show proof by pointing to many of my friends who have had "one bad day" - in many cases it was much more than just one day - and who are kind, generous, and would never hurt anybody.

Now, if you're wondering why I don't use me as an example, the answer is simple.

Unlike my friends, I'm broken and dangerous.

Okay last night I had a very unusual dream.

it started with me in school, and discovering I was failing in a class, and feeling very upset about that.

Then I went out of that classroom and realized that the building was some kind of construct, and I could walk through the walls.

So that's exactly what I did.

I had one scary moment when someone grabbed my arm as I was walking through a wall, but I told them to let me go or something messy would happen, and they let me go.

leeanna19 has been kind enough to noodle on my story for me, and given me enough ideas to not only finish this story, but to write a sequel as well.

Thanks so much, dear!

It's really weird that pain that has nothing to do with what happened to me can still trigger my PTSD.

I pulled a muscle in my stomach and the tenderness has me shaky.

Huggles appreciated.

yesterday I had two dreams that have me thinking I might be going in a good direction.

In the first I was in line to see a movie and wanted to make sure I'd be able to stop at the concession stand, and in the second I was at university and headed towards my locker after my last class.

What made these dreams different was that I knew where I wanted to go, I just had to make the journey, instead of feeling anxious that I wouldn't be able to find what I was looking for.

So hopeful, I think.

a health update: most of my flu symptoms have ended except I have a runny nose, and its hard to complain about that when I have felt so bad the last couple of days.

I have also started working on a new story, which has started out being something more appropriate to Halloween than now, which has me thinking once more that I am not the creator of my stories, they just arrive, and my only job is to be a good delivery girl and pass them on.

Anyway, that's my update for now..