Laurie gives a quiet laugh.

“What’s so funny?” I ask.

“This was supposed to be an easy summer job,” she reminds me. “Just collect data and let the big folks do the analysis and all the hard work. Things have sure changed.”

“Yeah,” I agree. “Maybe we should ask for a raise––”

Chapter 39: Choice

“You know, you’re pretty good with a computer,” the geeky young programmer guy tells me. He can’t be much older than 21–if that. He’s one of the junior programmers on the staff. “It’s not every day a kid like you can pick up on this stuff so quickly. It’s even rarer to find a girl with interests in programming.”

We’re sitting in his office at the Lab where he’s been teaching me the basics of programming my library database for use across the Lab’s intranet. We’ve been at it all morning and he’s shown me much more than I technically need. I’m getting the impression that he’s showing off–in his own way–to impress me. Apparently I’ve impressed him too. But, then again, anyone near his age wearing a skirt would probably get his undivided attention. I don’t think he spends much time around real girls.

“I’m just starting to learn about network and web stuff,” I admit. “My boyfriend has been teaching me about web pages and I’m trying to learn about how to use databases with his web projects. We have a couple of things we want to do with his site. He has his own server at home so there’s no limit to what he can do. One thing I need to learn more about is how to deal with security issues.”

Steve, the programmer, looks a bit deflated at the boyfriend statement, but it looks like he enjoys a challenge.

“You’ve come to the right place, Tina,” he boasts. “I know a thing or two about network security.  After all, I got this job when somebody found out about my hacking hobby. I beat out a lot of experienced hackers in a recent competition too. Someone reckoned it’d be better to have me on their side instead of me trying to hack their systems, hence the job. What’s the URL for your boyfriend’s site?”

Within minutes, not only has he found the site, but he’s hacked into the server and has complete access to the Lang’s home network. He did it so fast that I couldn’t keep up with what he did.

“Wow, how’d you do that?” I ask in amazement.

“It’s pretty rudimentary,” he says with an inflated ego. “He’s using low budget security software which has vulnerabilities that no one’s bothered to tell the developers about or that they don’t want to fix for some reason. Here, let me show you how it’s done.”

Over the next half hour, I discover how to work my way through the process. It’s slow as he has to explain the basics of how networks and network security systems work.  My head is spinning by the time we’re done–but I think I can repeat the process from another computer.

“Now,” he says, “there’s a bit of clean up you need to do if you want to cover your tracks in case someone decides to look at activity on the system.”  By lunch time, I’ve learned an incredible amount of information–all recorded on my cell phone for later reference.

“He’s got some great pictures of you on the site,” Steve observes, “I bet he’s got more on his hard drive. We can look at them if you like. Do you do modeling on the side?”

“No, I’m sure he’ll show them to me,” I answer, “And no–I don’t model.”

“Well, you should,” he says bringing up a picture of Laurie and I. “You’re a lot better looking than your sister here. I bet you look pretty hot in a bikini.”

“That’s my cousin,” I inform him, ignoring the comment about the bikini, “and I think she’s pretty cute.”

“Hey, looky here,” Steve gets excited about a new discovery. “He’s password protected a couple of subdirectories here. The names don’t make much sense. If we had the time we could break into those and see what he’s up to.”

“Can’t you just work some magic and get it?” I ask.

“There are a couple of ways to get in,” he says, “but they all take time. The easiest way is to upload some spyware which will keep track of keystrokes. I’ve got some here which none of the current spyware programs can detect. Let me show you how it works.”

Without asking if I think he should or not, he uploads the program and shows me how to retrieve the data from it.

“Once the programs migrate to the other computers you’ll be able to get any password typed anywhere on his home network with this baby,” he proudly boasts. “I wrote it myself.” Like that was hard to figure out–he is pretty proud of his abilities. “I’ve also set it up to capture copies of email that pass through the server and a log of websites visited. We could have it forward the information to your email account or another server but that’d be too easy to trace if the software is found. It’s best to leave it on his server and get it when you want it. The program is set to delete captured data that is over a week old so the capture files don’t overwhelm his local hard drive so you need to check it regularly. You can also watch what’s going on real time too.”  He shows me how this is done.

I thank him for his help and ask if I can return if I have any questions. He makes a half hearted attempt at asking me out–suggesting that he has a lot more that he can teach me–but I just smile and tell him that Andy and I have other plans during that time.  Having a boyfriend comes in handy at times like this.

Before meeting the girls for lunch, I stop by the office and download my session with Steve on to a thumb drive then delete it from the phone–hopefully before the security team does their daily check of my phone.

---<>---

Tiff’s not in a very good mood today.  As Laurie and I join her for lunch her latest boyfriend is nowhere in sight.

“So, Tiff,” I ask, “where’s your friend?”

“Humph,” she scowls, “Some friend. I swear that guy’s hands never stayed still at the dance. I was on the defensive all night.”

“I saw him grab your buns during one dance,” I tell her. “You whacked him pretty good.”

“I spent all evening trying to convince him that he didn’t need to feel me up,” she sighed. “And I thought he’d be different. What’s with guys? They never seem to have anything but their own pleasure on their minds.”

“I don’t know about that,” Laurie observes, “Chris is pretty good. We reached an understanding early and he has respected it ever since. I really get the feeling he likes me–not just my body.”

“He probably knows that Marla and I would kill him if he acted that way towards any girl,” Tiff points out.

“Andy seems pretty respectful too,” I mention.

“That’s just because he’s playing you nice right now,” Tiff warns me. “When he gets you feeling all secure and everything, he’ll make his move. When he does, he’ll promise undying love. In the end he’ll just leave you after he gets what he wants. I’ve decided I’ll know a guy is serious when he makes a marriage proposal. Until then, my body is off limits to any and every guy. None of the love ’em and leave ’em stuff for me anymore.”

My...isn’t Tiff in a man-hating mode today. She’s not new at this losing a boyfriend thing but she gets pretty worked up whenever it happens.

“I take it you’re not seeing him again?” Laurie asks.

“No,” Tiff sighs. “Not in this life time. So, ladies, what are you two up to tonight? I’m feeling like a girl’s night out. I need to let out some frustrations. Maybe we can get Marla to come.”

“I can’t,” I wince. “Andy’s picking me up when he gets off work tonight.”

“What do you have in mind?” Laurie asks her. “I’m on ice all summer until Chris gets back.”

---<>---

Andy arrives shortly after he gets off at six. I’ve changed out of my nice work clothes into shorts and a top again–similar to what I wore last night but different. I fuss with my makeup and hair for way longer than is really necessary trying to figure out what would be most attractive to Andy. I know what Chris would like, so I just go with that. This girl stuff is just so much different than being a guy.

I greet my boyfriend–I kinda like that word, ‘boyfriend’–at the door with a long kiss. After a quick visit with Aunt Jen we are on our way.

“I should warn you,” Andy tells me after we get to the car. “Dad’s really not happy about you coming tonight. He and Mom had a big fight about it last night–one of the worst that they’ve had so he’s in a very bad mood. Just be nice and stay out of his way and everything should be okay.”

“I hope they weren’t fighting just about me,” I say with concern.

“Well,” he hesitates, “yes and no. Dad says that he wants me to quit seeing you but Mom really encourages the relationship. She thinks you’re good for me and she won’t let Dad stand in the way.”

I smile at that, “And what do you think? Am I good for you?”

“You’re definitely good for me,” he says with a grin. “There’s no question about it.”

“Even if I do turn your world upside down? I like to think you’re good for me too,” I say, “but not everyone agrees.”

“Oh, who thinks there’s a problem,” he asks.

“Caitlin is of two minds,” I tell him. “On the one hand she thinks every girl needs to put having a boyfriend first on her list so–in that respect–you’re good for me. On the other hand she thinks you’re a bad influence since I’m missing running practice for you tonight. For some reason, she’s convinced that I’m the only reason anyone comes to the practice.”

“I can understand that,” he says still wearing that silly grin on his face. “I’d be tempted to take up running if that’s what it takes to be around you.”

I just roll my eyes and contemplate hitting him on the shoulder for that comment–which is just too corny.

Sure enough, Papa Lang is not a happy camper as we walk hand-in-hand into the house.  He just scowls at me when I greet him.  Mrs. Lang is the polar opposite.  You’d think I was a long lost daughter or something. She gives me a big hug and complements me on my new top and says she likes the way I’m wearing my hair today before sending Andy upstairs to change out of his work clothes and inviting me to join her in the kitchen.

Before I know it, I’m helping make a salad while Andy sets the table. By the time we sit down to eat, Mrs. Lang has wrung my–modified–life history out of me and my plans for the future. She is kind and very chatty during her interrogation. I learn a lot about her and her family as well. And all this in under twenty minutes. She can easily keep up with a fast-paced teen girl’s conversation. She’s a pro at it.

During dinner, she keeps up the pace. I did pick up a few embarrassing stories about Andy’s childhood which are precious. Andy’s blush indicates his mother could have skipped a few stories, but, hey–as my parents are prone to saying–it’s the parent’s prerogative and duty to embarrass their children. Parents seem to take some kind of perverse pleasure in doing so.

Andy’s father stays quiet during the meal. Mrs. Lang seems to like it that way. You can tell he can’t wait for it to be over. If looks could kill, I’d have been buried before everyone got seated for the meal. I try to pull him into the conversation but get nothing more than grunts or one word responses. I try turning on my charm but it only works on two out of three of my hosts.

This time, Mrs. Lang is happy for us to help with the cleanup activities.  Once we’re done, Andy and I excuse ourselves to go upstairs to his room with directions to keep the door open. After our last two dates, that’s probably a really good idea.

I manage to leave my bag with cell phone in their entryway which is central to the downstairs. I wonder what intriguing conversations it’ll pick up tonight.

Over the next couple of hours we download and install an open source database system. We also get a good start on organizing a database for storing his image properties. We need the database so that we can move on to making dynamic web pages which show his work in different ways depending on what the user is looking for.  We get really engrossed in the work to the point where we don’t pay attention to anything else. We’re just two friends working together.  Okay–almost like two friends working together.  Friends–that is–who like to congratulate each other’s work with a quick kiss. And we really admire each other’s work–a lot.  We do stay away from heavy making out as Mrs. Lang seems prone to walking by the open doorway from time to time. She did see Andy giving me a quick kiss after I showed him something interesting about database management. We both blushed mightily but she just smiled and left us alone. 

Looking at the system clock, I see that it’s approaching nine o’clock–the time I set for myself to go home.  As Chris I rarely stayed out much later than this.  Now I reset my expectation to nine thirty–after all, we are in the middle of a particularly difficult problem. A problem that can only be solved if we keep encouraging each other. We keep it up.

Mrs. Lang comes to the door a little later holding my bag, “Tina, your bag was just making some strange noises, like some dying animal.  Was that your ring tone?”

“Yes,” I reply happily as I take the bag from her, “It’s the noise that a moose makes. Isn’t it different?”

“It’s definitely different,” she agrees without seeming impressed.  “It’s very Alaskan,” she says as she leaves us.

Digging out the cell phone I see that it’s a little after nine thirty. “Oh crap!,” I exclaim, “Look at what time it is.”

The missed call was from Caitlin. I better call her back soon.

“Do you mind if I send a text to Caitlin?” I ask Andy sweetly. “It’ll only take a minute.”

Getting the go-ahead from Andy I text her letting her know that I’ll call when I get home in a little bit.

“This is great fun, Andy,” I say with some urgency, “but I really need to be getting home. I was supposed be home at nine. Would you give me a ride home please?”

“I wish you didn’t have to go,” he sighs. “We’re just starting to get all the pieces together.”

“Andy,” I explain to him, “It’s going to take several more evenings at this rate before we get something workable. We’ve got a lot to learn yet.”

“But we are getting better at kissing,” he points out with that silly grin on his face.

I’m sure my grin is as silly as his, “Yeah, at least the short ones.  We still need work on the longer ones and here’s probably not the place to do it. Anyway, I think the kissing practice is slowing down the programming.”

“I’m sure it is,” he agrees. “But I don’t mind.”

“Me neither,” I smile in reply, giving him a other quick kiss.

Gathering my belongings from the entry I bid goodbye to Andy’s mother.  His dad is nowhere in sight. Mrs. Lang gives me a hug and encourages me to return soon. I think I have a friend for life.

Andy walks me to the door after the short drive to the Mercer home.

“Shall do this again tomorrow?” he asks.

“I really need to run tomorrow,” I remind him with a frown. “I’m really tempted to skip again but I think Caitlin will kill me if I do. Also, I need to keep my training going. And–before you ask–I promised Caitlin that I’d spend some time with her after running tomorrow.”

“Mom wants me to help with a watercolor class she’s holding at the store on Wednesday evening. I imagine you’ve got running practice every night,” he says dejectedly.

“I do,” the disappointment evident in my voice as well. “Why don’t you call me tomorrow and we’ll talk at least.”

He wraps his wonderfully strong arms around me and says, “It’s just that we can’t do this over the phone,” then proceeds to give me a toe curling kiss as I wrap my arms around his neck and do my best to match his intensity.

“Hey,” a familiar voice comes out of the dark, “Put her down, Andy, before you suffocate the poor girl.”

Laurie grins at us as she walks up to the porch as we separate with extremely red faces.

“Hey, cousin,” I greet her. “Where’ve you been?”

“Out with Tiff, Marla and few other girls,” she replies, “since you abandoned me. When you’re done doing mouth-to-mouth resuscitation with Andy I’ve got to talk with you.”

“I’ll be in in a minute,” I tell her as she heads inside.

Andy and I engage in another passionate kiss before I reluctantly pull way and say good night.

Entering the living room where Laurie and her mother are waiting, I flop down on the couch in an un-ladylike fashion.

“Whew, how am I supposed to get all this done?” I ask in frustration. “Andy time is getting in the way of my running. My running is getting in the way of my Andy time. I’m supposed to be making more inroads into the Sommers home and then there’s work. When am I supposed to get in some Laurie time?”

“Life’s tough, Sweetheart. Why don’t you go put your stuff away and come join us on the patio?” Aunt Jen suggests. It’s evident that she doesn’t want me to bring my eavesdropping devices.

“Sure, right after I give Caitlin a quick call,” I answer. “She’s waiting for me to call her.”

The phone call is frustratingly short for both of us, but we agree to catch up more fully after tomorrow’s running practice. Some guy at work asked her to a movie on Friday night and she can’t wait to tell me all about it. She’s a little worried about the guy and thinks I should talk Andy into making it a double date. She also wants to hear about how things are progressing with Andy. Oh, and she invited me and Andy to go waterskiing again this Saturday with her family. She’s actually thinking of inviting the girls from the running team and their dates also.

I join Laurie and her mother on the patio where Aunt Jen has iced tea waiting for me.

“Girls,” Aunt Jen quietly begins. “Susan and I are convinced that the problem we’re having involves at least one and maybe more of the Security team. As a result, we’ve decided to start our own investigation. Tina, your work has been invaluable. In fact, both of you have contributed much more than we’ve asked for and it’s a good thing that you’ve violated your instructions and used your heads. I’ve been using some outside resources to follow up on the information you’ve given me and new information is flowing in quickly now that we know where to look. Tina, your recording of Dr. Lang’s phone call to Mr. Rana was just the key we needed to get things off the ground.

“The real problem now is to finish identifying the extent of the problem. We need to know who all the involved players are and their roles. We also need to collect enough evidence to convict the guilty. The hard part of this will be to collect information without tipping off what we’re doing.  That means we need to continue to work with the Security team as if nothing else is happening. You girls need to continue to go about your assigned duties as instructed by the committee, but we also need your help in smoking out the problem people.

“I know that Susan suggested moving you to another division, Tina, but you rightly pointed out that doing so might actually spook the bad guys. We’d like you to continue at the Ignition Facility, but you need to be extra careful.

“A couple of things have come to light the past few days. One of the most significant is that Mr. Rana probably is the gateway for the information leaking out of the Lab. We’ve had some top notch cyber sleuths monitoring his computer and phone systems and the information they’ve retrieved so far indicates that he is in regular contact with several Lab employees who don’t seem to currently need legal assistance. Indeed most are sending some encrypted files to him which are then forwarded on to other people with more obvious ties to terrorist groups. The encryption is not one of the Lab’s standard protocols. So far we’ve been unable to break the encryption but we have some of the best people in the world working on it as we speak. Mr. Rana is using a cyber security system which is pretty tight. Much tighter than you’d expect from a typical lawyer.  It took our guys a few days to figure out how to break into it without setting off any warnings. They tell me that the system uses protocols different from what they’re used to seeing in this country.

“Another accomplishment is that–as far as our little group is concerned–we’ve cleared Dr. Sommers of any suspicion of wrong doing.  The information that you, Laurie, have provided really helped in that.  When I called him in today, he seemed more than eager to help us. He’s agreed to plant some modified technical reports out where Laurie can find them. He doesn’t know about the two of you by name, but he knows that we have at least one person in place looking for leaks in his project group. We’ll be watching to see where the data goes once Laurie sends it. Laurie, we need you to get close to Rachel Conners to see what you can learn about her.

“For now, we’re not letting the rest of the Security team know that Dr. Sommers is off the hook. This means, Tina, that you have to keep acting like you’re checking him out. You really need to keep up your contact with Caitlin and spend time with her family acting like you’re looking for clues.”

“No problem, Aunt Jen,” I confidently tell her. “I’ll be going over tomorrow after running.”

“Great, Tina,” she smiles at me. “We know you’ve got some resources you’re using which you aren’t sharing with us yet. We don’t know how you’ve managed to obtain the planted false information, but we’re glad that you have. That piece of work convinced both Susan and I that there are troubles in the Security team and that we needed to start taking a closer look at our team. I can understand why you’d like to protect your sources, but it might be helpful if you can share them with us when you feel comfortable doing so. In the mean time, see if you can get any more misleading documents to send on.  Just let Susan or me know as soon as you send it so that we can get people to start tracking it.

“We’ve made great strides in the last week because of the tips you girls have given us. We need you to keep up the good work.”

Laurie positively glows at the praise. She’s been feeling something like a spare wheel up to now.

“Tina,” Aunt Jen continues with a very serious expression. “Everyone on the Security team knows about your transformation. We have to assume that Mr. Rana knows about it too if we do indeed have a leak in the committee. I’m not sure how far that information will spread once he does get it. Judging from the comments he made Saturday either our leak hasn’t told him the whole story yet or he realizes divulging the information to you will prove that the leak is in the Security team. I’m not sure what problems this’ll cause if the truth gets out, but we have to assume that it will. You’ve given us what appears to be the key to the operation so the disguise has fulfilled its purpose.  If either you or we get the feeling that you’re in any danger at all, however, we will pull you out and hide you away in the Sierras until this comes to a conclusion.  This’ll give you the rest of the summer to fish and camp–something the three of us know Chris would love to do. In fact, if you want to bail out for any reason, just let me know. As I’ve said, you still have a lot to offer to the investigation but we can probably pursue the rest of it without you because of the breakthroughs you’ve given us. Just let me know when you’re ready. We’ll simply tell the rest of the committee that the original plan is not working out and there’s no need to keep you around like this any longer.”

I’m sitting here in shock. I can quit now. I can go back to being Chris. Is this what I want?  Maybe a few weeks ago but what about now? Checking with Brain Central, all I get is it’s up to you, kid, be we’re enjoying the ride. Why stop now?  I have to agree.

“Ah..., Aunt Jen,” I nervously reply. “I’m kinda’ in the middle of things right now. As you’ve pointed out, there’s more information which I can provide. Can I think about it?”

“Sure, darling,” she smiles gently at me, “take your time. You definitely have to go back to being Chris at the end of the summer. It might be easier to do now.”

“Yeah,” I absently reply. “I’ll think about it.”

“Tina,” Aunt Jen continues, “I’m sure that you and Laurie plan to talk about any findings from today, however, would it be a problem for me to join in the conversation?  I’d particular like to hear anything you’ve learned from the Langs besides how nice it is for a girl to be kissed by a handsome young man who really likes you.”

This change of gears brings me back from a question I don’t want to think about right now.

“Dr. Lang,” I mention coming back to the conversation, “is not happy about Andy seeing me. Apparently Mr. Rana has given him enough reason to mistrust me. He didn’t have much to say to me tonight.  I left my cell phone out where the parents might be talking while I was working with Andy. I haven’t had a chance to listen to it yet, but maybe there’s something new. I’ll go get it if you’re done talking about things the Security team shouldn’t hear.”

With that, I retrieve my phone and computer.  After downloading the audio file we spend the next hour searching for anything meaningful. We’re disappointed in that the senior Langs aren’t really speaking to each other and each were engaged in their own activities away from each other.

As we search the file I contemplate the need to tell them about the spy software that’s been installed on Andy’s server. I can’t use my laptop to check it as someone will see what I’m doing since it is monitored.  Also, I should check the spyware from someplace other than the Mercer home in case I forget to delete the relevant entries in the web log and someone tries tracking the IP addresses.  To do this, I need to find another computer and the time to visit some public place with free wireless and lots of users.  I can get my real father to get me my old laptop from his house, but–with running and dividing time between Andy, Laurie and Caitlin, I don’t really have the time to sneak off regularly to check the files. Maybe I could do it from work?  I just worry about someone looking over my shoulder and seeing what I’m doing. It’d be hard to explain.

“Aunt Jen,” I say after I’ve put away my computer and cell phone, “I might be able to get the information you need to break the encryption program. I’ll need a computer which the Lab’s not tracking and some time to visit locations which have free internet. I know where I can get a computer, but I’m really short on time right now. I don’t even have time left for Andy this week. Do you think I could get some time off during the day? I should only need an hour or two a day.”

“I can let you borrow the car over lunch each day,” she says. “I think I can get your supervisor to let you have extended lunch hours if I tell her that you’re running errands for my office. When do you want to start?” 

“How about tomorrow and every day there after for a while?” I ask.

“We can do that,” she agrees. Thankfully she doesn’t pry for details. It’s nice to be trusted by an adult.

As I finish getting ready for bed, I dig out my anonymous cell phone and send a text to Dr. Quinn.

Dr. Q... Ur new grl needs Chris laptop asap. Put in M’s unlocked car. Ur grl says to say she’s doing lots of long jogs these days.

Even though it’s late and I’m tired, sleep is slow in coming as I ponder the possible to an early end to my adventure in girl land. I wasn’t expecting an early release and I don’t think I want one. I really need to think about this more.

On one hand, it’d be great to get back to the simple life again.  And a month of fishing, hiking, and camping in the high Sierra has always been a dream of mine. It’ll be great to miss my next period–which I’m reminded should happen again real soon. Peeing standing up sounds great too. I wouldn’t have to mess with hair or makeup anymore either. Looking at my long, beautifully manicured nails reminds me how much easier it was not to have to mess with them either. Also, it would be a really good idea to pull the plug on my relationship with Andy before it gets any deeper.

On the other hand, I’m really enjoying being a girl now. I admit to myself that I really like the clothes, the makeup, the new girl friends, and the boyfriend. Sure, I have quite a few friends as a guy, but there’s something special between girl friends which I’ll really miss. And–even though I have Laurie as a girlfriend–I’ll miss the special time with Andy.

So, what do I do? Make the most of the summer as a girl or take the dream vacation?

I just don’t know. I guess I’ll just sleep on it for now.

It feels strange to have a choice.

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Thanks–yet again–to Gabi for her able editing.