Lynn's Story - Part 3

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Lynn's Story
Embraceable You!

 
The Minskoff Theater, November, 1984...

'Dozens of girls would storm up;
I had to lock my door.
Somehow I couldn't warm up
To one before.
What was it that controlled me?

“Patty?” Lynn called out; the voice almost disembodied as she squeezed her head between the two heavy curtains.

“I’m coming,” the girl answered, hopping onto the stage. She walked over and stepped through the gap and looked around.

“Crew’s gone for lunch, sweetie.”

Patty smiled and drew her partner in for a quick kiss. Even on a supposedly welcoming platform as a Broadway stage, the two remained discrete. Work in New York, especially on Broadway, might be available if highly competitive. Hollywood, particularly television, was less forgiving, as if the two needed to atone for their love. Patricia Salerno had entered Lynn’s life a bit later than most would have expected; the twenty-nine year old woman was a set designer when she met Lynn; Lynn enjoyed a rare opportunity as an understudy for Betty Buckley in Cats. By understudy, everyone understood that she was the emergency backup for a lot of the women of the cast, and that Buckley’s actual understudy was both very good and very healthy. That left Lynn looking for work and ending up as a vocal coach and occasional cast back up.

“You know I could never warm up to someone before you?” Lynn said that often; perhaps unnecessarily so, but Patty understood just how insecure her partner was. It was difficult enough to look over her shoulder wondering if the next tap would be to alert her to a hastily formed press conference regarding her sexuality; what would happen if they knew what she had been at her birth.

“I know. I’m just a hot tomato, I am,” Patty smiled and kissed Lynn once again; this time longer and with much more abandon. Lynn pulled away, looking around nervously.

“We have nothing to be ashamed of!” Patty insisted, pulled Lynn closer. Just then Dave Lewis stepped between the gap in the curtain; nearly bumping into Lynn, who pulled away and straightened her cardigan.

“Jeez, Lynn, relax, okay? I’m family, and I’ll never tell.” He laughed and Lynn turned a bright red.

“Honey…It’s okay, really. You’re worrying about nothing.” Lynn turned away at his words. Patty touched her arm and she pulled away.

“Lynn….please….” Patty pled, but Lynn stepped further away, hugging herself.

“I’m so sorry…I’m a nervous wreck. They’re talking about pulling the plug on this.” She used her hand in a broad gesture, sweeping her arm in an arc.

“Well, maybe we’ll last past next week; a turkey like this deserves at least to last past Thanksgiving. Besides, it’s not like either of us will be out of work.” Patty laughed softly. She had been a theater arts teacher at CCNY for four years, and was happy to teach. Lynn was still doing voice- over and cartoon work, and being the utility infielder of the show wasn’t such a great gig other than that it kept her busy. Her nervousness came from some other source; an issue that Patty had tried to resolve for months without success. Tonight was almost a last chance in a way.

“The rumors are false!” Dave insisted as several of the crew returned from lunch. A moment later the director walked up the stairs to the stage as the curtain parted; a dramatically painful moment as he spoke.

“I’m sorry, kids. They pulled the plug.” His choice of words seemed fitting as all the energy in the theater seemed to dissipate in an instant.

“You’ll be paid ‘til the end of the week. I’m sorry, but it’s not like we didn’t expect it.” He frowned and shook his head; several of the cast began to cry.

“I guess I spoke too soon,” Dave laughed softly.

Ever the optimist, he seemed almost unfazed even though he had the most to lose as the male lead. Too many stories and too many whispers sealed everyone’s fate, since even in 1984, life was still harsh for a man who romanced a woman on stage but bedded a young man at home. The producers were gun-shy when it came to taking a risk on him, even though he had some of the best pipes in the business. Wondering just who he was actually singing to seemed to put off only a handful of folks, but they were vocal and wrote letters and complaints to local magazines and big city papers.

“Hell, I’ve always wanted to visit Florence, so now I’ve got some free time.” He shrugged his shoulders and began to tear up.

“Dave…it’s not your fault. They’re idiots…just fucking idiots!” Someone yelled from off stage.

“Yeah…honey. Don’t think anything of it. You know what they said when we started rehearsal? ‘The story is bad, but the music…..sucks’” Patty laughed.

“This was my last shot….I don’t think I can ratchet up any more strength to do this any longer.” Lynn looked down at her shoes.

“Don’t ….We’ll get through this.” Patty half-smiled before turning and seeing that most of the crew and cast had gathered on stage in commiseration. She waved to get their attention, but they seemed to miss the gesture. She put her fingers to her lips and whistled loud enough that heads turned.

“Okay…okay…folks?” Heads turned and she smiled broadly before stepping closer to Lynn, who looked at her with pleading eyes and the words ‘oh no’ mouthed silently.

What kept my love-life lean?
My intuition told me
You'd come on the scene.
Lady, listen to the rhythm of my heart beat,
and you'll get just what I mean.

I want to tell you all; some of you know already and some of you have probably guessed. But I want everyone to know that Lynn Marchioni is the love of my life. I was nothing before she came on the scene, and she brings me great joy and happiness.” Patty almost shouted.

Lynn had felt old beyond her years only moments before. And though her face reddened, it wasn’t from shame or guilt, but from an embarrassment of misplaced feelings of being unworthy; certainly she couldn’t be authentic by any one’s estimation. Even folks in their circle of friends seemed to be unable to accept all of her; it wasn’t good enough to be ‘just’ a lesbian. That her beginnings were significantly different from her ‘sisters’ wasn’t lost on several women, who viewed her almost as a charity case of friendship; someone to be tolerated rather than embraced or enjoyed.

Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you!
Embrace me, you irreplaceable you!

“You’re my life and my love, honey. And I want everyone to know!” Patty would never make a distinction on her own but she knew how Lynn felt about herself. She knew what life would promise if Lynn could have filled the lack that Patty felt; both women for two painfully similar but entirely different reasons were unable to bear children.

I love all, the many charms about you!
Above all, I want my arms about you!

Lynn put her hand to her face and began to sob. Patty stepped closer, urged on by the friendly nods of dear ones who didn’t know but still understood. She held Lynn in her arms; there really wasn’t that much difference between the two women after all other than that Patty was at a place where she accepted and almost embraced their limitations. She kissed Lynn on the ear as the woman held her hand tightly to her face in shame.

“Stop….no…” Lynn insisted, even as she continued to sob.

Nancy Wadden, the ostensible female lead to the now-canceled show began to cry in sympathy for the woman who felt so alone in the midst of many. She walked up to Patty and Lynn and embraced the two of them.

“Mama Lynn…please…it’s okay….please.” She held the two close; an example of what she wanted out of life…a love that would last a lifetime. Patty nodded and smiled.

“See, honey…it’s all real and all good. Don’t worry. We’ll be okay.” One by one the friends stepped close to the couple and touched a shoulder or an arm or a hand. One by one friends spoke in soft whispers words neither woman ever expected but longed to hear.

“It’s okay.”

“Shhh….we’re here…”

“Take care, honey.”

“It’s going to be okay.”

Lynn’s sobs began to ebb, replaced slowly by the still tearful but relieved cries of a woman who realized just how special she was; both to her friends and ‘family,’ but also to the woman who valued and treasured and loved her more than life itself.

Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you!
Embrace me, you irreplaceable you!

Chelsea...Manhattan, New York City...1992

“What do you want for you birthday?” Heather placed three bowls of hot and sour soup on the table in along with a large bowl of shrimp fried rice. The two women sitting at the table smiled and nodded.

“Oh…you mean the first anniversary of my forty-ninth birthday?” Lynn laughed.

“Well, I know how I want to celebrate it.” Patty stood up and walked around to the other side of the dining room table and embraced her partner. She leaned closer and kissed her; a tender moment between the two that brought the girl to tears.

“I’m so happy, I’ve got everything I’ve ever wanted.” Lynn looked at Patty before the two focused their attention on their daughter.

“Me, too, babe!” Patty laughed softly and waved at the girl.

“I guess it’s true….you know what they say? Right?”

“What’s true, honey?” Patty said, knowing exactly what their daughter was going to say. The girl laughed loudly and said,

“I guess Heather does have two mommies!” She smiled broadly as the couple laughed at her her quip before hugging once again. As they embraced, the girl began to whistle a very familiar tune before saying,

“I bet if he could see you, Uncle Ira would agree that that song was made for the two of you, huh?” She laughed softly before resuming the tune, only singing this time…

Don't be a naughty baby,
Come to mama, come to mama, do!
My sweet embraceable you!

~ fin ~


Embraceable You
words and music by
Ira and George Gershwin
as performed by
the incomparable Miss Cleo Laine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_dGfwaCIac

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Comments

"My sweet embraceable you!"

awww. Just nice on a tough day.

Dorothycolleen, member of Bailey's Angels

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Two Mommies

littlerocksilver's picture

One of my granddaughters' friends has two mommies. Very nice ending to a warm story.

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Portia

Portia

Thank you 'Drea,

ALISON

'one of the most romantic songs ever written," Embraceable You" ,and you have given us this beautiful,romantic story to go with the song.Delicious!!

ALISON