Since yesterday, my stories have received 117 total hits on them. While I'm pleased by the number of hits, it's very unusual to get that many hits on old works in one day, and I wonder if there isn't someone out there doing this on purpose? Numbers are fine and all, and I thank anyone who has taken the time to read my stories, but false increases are just that...false increases. Since there are no additional comments to accompany these increased numbers, I have to assume that they are false.
I am SLOWLY getting a bit better, but I am still way below normal functional parameters. Again, I apologise to those with whom I usually chat, but my awake times have been so erratic, and I've lost so much time that errands and tasks I'd planned to do, fell by the wayside and got bunched up. I have tons of stuff I have to do, and nowhere near time enough to do them all.
If there is a bright spot in all this, it's that the weather here is supposed to be nice through the weekend with lots of sunshine, so I can get outside and soak up some of it.
Have been for the better part of a week. Got a severe cold/flu/plague/something or other. Sorry to those I usually chat with, but this thing is kicking my ass.
Back when I get somewhere near what I laughingly refer to as healthy.
I recently purchased some Avon products from: www.youravon.com/peggyhicks and I find that I am very pleased with them. I met Peggy at The Southern Comfort Conference last year and I found her very understanding about us TG/TS/CD/whatever folks, and she is VERY discrete, respecting our need for secrecy/privacy.
Having resorted to shaving my arms and legs, and face, with disposable shavers, and suffering innumerable cuts and so forth, I tried a new little shaver that works VERY well. It's called The Microforce and it's only ten dollars at Wal-Mart. To my pleased amazement, it works VERY well indeed, and not only on my appendages, but my face as well. It's battery operated, no recharging, and works dry or wet. I debated with myself about whether to buy a more expensive shaver, but I thought I'd try this little one first.
I have agonized for months, re: my feminine presentation. Having somewhat low self esteem regarding my overall presentation, I have never, I repeat, NEVER considered myself female looking enough to be comfortable in public. That has gone by the boards. Over the last few months there have been more than a few instances where I have been accepted by people who have no other reason to accept that I am who and what I appear to be. To be accepted simply as just another female is still heady stuff for me, but I LOVE it!
Mainly though, at the bottom of it all, is one simple thing.
I've spent my whole life searching for "the one." I've looked everywhere and she seems to be either hiding, or I'm just too damn old and ugly for anyone to care about in "that" way.
Well here's a bit of news for everyone. Ugly people need love too!
For your good wishes, prayers and everything else that you expressed in your responses to my blog entries about my surgery. You all really helped ease my mind and my fears about it.
I'm back home. The surgery went well. It turned out to be not a hernia OR a cyst, but some kind of hydro seminal blockage or something like that. The upshot is they fixed the blockage and did take one of my testicles, so I'm halfway to an orchiectomy. This also helped allay some of my fears about undergoing surgery under a full anaesthesia, since I came through this well.
I'll be in Buffalo today at the Veteran's Hospital, getting some surgery done. Unfortunately it's not the surgery I would HOPE for... this is to remove a large, ingrown cyst from my groin area. Hopefully, while they're in the area, and they DO know my desire to have a couple of small trouble makers removed... oh well.
The year I began my RLT, I wanted to do something special for my best friend's daughter, my Goddaughter. So, I took her to a nail salon and we both had our nails done, both of us got acrylics. It was a special bonding thing for us both, I think.
Anyway, Sunday being Mother's Day, I racked my alleged brain trying to think of something special for my best friend, Tina. Now, Tina is not what you'd; call a girly-girl. In truth, she's more of a tomboy than anything else...however.
I have noticed that the stories being written in The Home That Love Built universe are receiving considerably fewer hits and comments than I feel they deserve. Are they not exciting enough? Are they TOO full of emotion? Do they perhaps, strike too close to home for most of you? Am I expecting too much?
Another trip to the Buffalo VA hospital yesterday wore me out. However... I finally have a surgery date. May 17th. What I am suffering from, initially diagnosed as a hernia has now been re-diagnosed as an internal cyst. Basically it's a swelling in my groin area. There is very little pain involved, but it scared the hell out of me when it first appeared, as I covered in my first couple of blogs about this.
So why do I feel three days older than dirt? I'm so frustrated right now with the VA, with life, with damn near everything actually. I won't go into any of that in this blog, since you all have your own problems to deal with. Remember that BUTTON story that Grover posted? If that damned button was right here, right now, I'd jump all over that thing... in a freaking heartbeat, and have NO regrets about it after!
The video is from a STNG episode which had Ryker falling for an androgenous person from another world who's civilization frowns on having only one gender... in fact, they consider it a crime and they have a "cure" for the perverse members of their civilization who commit the crime of having tendencies of being only one gender.
The defense speech given by Soren, the love interest of Ryker, could be delivered by any one of us, whether we're TG, TS, CD, TV, IS, or whatever.
So...I'm watching TV a few nights ago, got the dish network now...LOTS more channels and less money than cable. Anyway, I'm on the computer at the same time when I catch a phrase from the TV about a place called, BIKINI BEACH!!!!
Well, of course my ears perked up and I switched my full attention to the TV and what did my unbelieving ears and eyes see and hear? An honest to god commercial about The Bikini Beach Resort and Motel!!!!!
It's been 6 months since I attended my very first TG conference, SCC 2009 in Atlanta Georgia. It's taken me all this time to organize, collate, and digest all I learned and experienced there.
I've spent the better part of the last two days lost in remembrance of those I loved who are gone. My parents, my best friend ever, Mikey, John Denver, Mary Travers, Mamma Cass, Karen Carpenter, KimEm, and so many others.
Memories. They come as comfort and pain together, wrapped in smiles and tears, heartbreak and wonderment. I've lost or left so many friends, in so many places that I cannot recall some of them. Imagine that. People who I called friends and was called friend by them...and I can't remember their names...or even their faces. Yet I miss them, one and all.
After a sleepless night (up at 1AM and couldn't get back to sleep) I was picked up at 6AM for the trip to the VA hospital in Buffalo N.Y. It snowed all the way there, sometimes reducing visibility to less than 100 feet. The roads, even the interstate, were not good at all, and we saw many cars and trucks off the road in the ditches.
but I'm too wiped out to write anything right now. I'll blog tomorrow. For now, let's just say that my worst fears seem unfounded. There IS a problem, but not such a serious, life threatening one.
for having been, over the last few weeks, ungrateful, forgetful, and just generally, a bitch. I can only plead a plate seemingly overfull of everything from my own health, personal problems, other's troubles, and many other things.
so let me set the record straight. Tina and I ONLY have a platonic relationship. That all it has ever been, that's all it will ever be, and I am FINE with that. It's being completely alone in the house that has me spooked. As for a pet...NO freaking way. Been there, been tied down by it, Won't do it again.
This morning, my housemate/best friend? told me that she and her boyfriend are going to get a house together. He won't move in with her with me here, and she refuses to kick me out so he would move in.
I have, no doubt, alienated some friends, and have been generally hard to get along with. I know that my health issues are certainly a big part of this. Not knowing exactly what's going on with my health is preying on my mind. Additionally, there is some pain associated with what's going on, and that makes me irritable as well.
It appears, at least on the surface, that whatever is going on in my nether parts is not cancerous...at least on first examination. More tests will be run when I get to the VA hospital and further causes/ solutions will be found/discussed. A partial orchiectomy is not out of the question, although I will lobby for taking both as long as they are going to be taking one. I mean, as long as they are RIGHT THERE...you know?
I have recently become aware of a growth in a very sensitive internal area. There is some minor pain associated with it. I am scheduled to see a doctor today and, depending on his diagnosis, I may have to go to Buffalo for surgery, since the V.A. is the only health provider I have.
Checks can be made out & sent to:
Joyce Melton
1001 Third St.
Space 80
Calimesa, CA 92320
USA
Note: $6000 is the operating, maintenance and upgrade budget. Amounts received in excess of the $6000 will be applied to long term debt accrued over the last 19 years.
