I have recently become aware of a growth in a very sensitive internal area. There is some minor pain associated with it. I am scheduled to see a doctor today and, depending on his diagnosis, I may have to go to Buffalo for surgery, since the V.A. is the only health provider I have.

I am frightened out of my mind, but writing is my only way to help myself mentally. You have all been so kind to me through these past several years. I consider you all friends, some of you closer than my own family, and I thought you all had a right to know what's going on in case I can't contact any of you while I am in the hospital, if I have to go in. The V.A. hospital in Buffalo doesn't have public internet, although there are a number of wireless networks there. Unfortunately, all of them are password access only, and I don't know if I'll be able to use any of them.

If this is what I fear it might be, I want to thank all of you, from my heart, for all your kindnesses, all your kind words, and the reception you've given me and my stories. At times, your comments were the only things that lifted my spirits and made me believe that I was worth being cared about.

Love one another. If you love someone, as a friend or as a lover, TELL THEM, every chance you get!! Please don't fight any more. We are all sisters and brothers, and the only way we will ever get what we need is by presenting a unified front. The small differences between a TV and a TG are infinitesimal compared to the commonalities that make us who and what we are.

Support one another. Understand one another. LOVE one another. You are a remarkable bunch of wonderful people, and I thank God that I found you and have been accepted as an equal, and as a friend, by all of you.

My friends here at home will keep you all updated as to my condition, if I can't. My best friend, Tina, my housemate for over 17 years will have my computer and instructions on how to post here. The same goes for my friend Mike, known to some of you as Dak Roland.

There is every possibility that I am misreading my symptoms, but these things I needed to say, just in case I'm right.

Thank you all for the best ten years of my life. I love you all. Wish me luck, and pray for me, if you can.

For now, farewell. All that remains is this. To a certain someone. She knows who she is. I love you. I will always love you, no matter what. In someone else's words, "If God so wills, I shall love you even more, in -----."

All my love, hopes and dreams,
Catherine Linda Michel