Healing Mishap -15-

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Healing Mishap -15-
By Lanzaq

Arric brushed himself off. “Hello earth to Kate! You just teleported a 10 ton giant golem four miles into the air! You need to heal everyone so we can get out of here, like now!”

Kate sniffled brushing tears from her eyes. “ I-its fine, even if the golem had strong enough magic to hold itself together there is no way that it could actually hit us.”

“well whatever if you say we are alright, however wrong I feel this will be, I guess we are safe.” Arric said. “But still it does our friends no good to lie there unconscious.”

---

Derrik sat behind the counter of his families general shop, expecting a man to deliver some late goods. He stared lazily at the door as a man walked in looking rather goofy. 'he has on hunter green boots, a gaudy black and red velvet cloak with white fur trim, while wearing a cassock, well not the weirdest I have ever seen come through the shop.'

“You Boy.” Lanzerus said staring Derrik straight in the face. “You happen to have any sort of magical catalysts? I am in need of some white sand and a large pearl.”

“White what?” Derrik said staring back. “I am afraid we only have what you see on the shelf, we don't carry foreign goods. However if you can stomach it you could always find one of those elf traders.” Derrik broke eye contact. “ But I wouldn't trust them.”

Lanzerus let out a contemplative sound and further studied the boy. “You ever try divine magic?”

“No my parents were never fond of magic-users, they thought they were on the same level as elves, why?”

“Because I think I might have found myself an amazing new apprentice.”

---

Arric brushed himself off. “Hello earth to Kate! You just teleported a 10 ton giant golem four miles into the air! You need to heal everyone so we can get out of here, like now!”

Kate sniffled brushing tears from her eyes. “ I-its fine, even if the golem had strong enough magic to hold itself together there is no way that it could actually hit us.”

“well whatever if you say we are alright, however wrong I feel this will be, I guess we are safe.” Arric said. “But still it does our friends no good to lie there unconscious.”

Kate walked over to Ash, her emotional state making a complete 180 degree turnabout. With a quick incantment in High-Church Ash was back on her feet. She nodded the nod that told a thousand words.

“You know, ever time you heal Ash, then Cael it normally ends in the bad for him.” Arric said.

“What like him being slowly emasculated by some unknown goddess pulling a bunch of magical mishap strings?” Raleigh said rubbing a large bump forming on the back of his head. “Guys am I bleeding at all?”

“Yes, in fact, copious amounts, like a drunk hemophiliac.” Arric said trying not to laugh. “If I were to be bleeding like you I would be worried about my health and well being.”

“Seriously?” Raleigh said taking his hands off of the bump to look at them only to discover that the man had been joking the entire time. “You, sir are an ass.”

“Kate, Tend to Raleigh before Cael, lets see if we can eliminate a variable.” Arric said. “Besides maybe a hormone imbalance will do this one some good.”

“Okay but I don't think Raleigh needs to be revived, just some minor first aide.” Kate said walking over to Raleigh and examining his bumped and bruised head. “Besides I like to work from most critical to least.”

“But if Ash and Cael both have the same injuries, and both are unconscious then who do you determine who gets healed first?”

Kate just stared at him for a second tilting her head to one side before turning towards Cael. She began the incantation when a boulder, presumably an arm or leg from the golem, pierced the ceiling and barely missed Arrics noes. She stopped mid incantation to look at Arric. “You alright?”

Blanched but altogether still in one piece he nodded. “Go ahead.”

Kate resumed the incantation and quickly finished. Cael opened his eyes, stared at Kate, looked around the ruins and passed back out.

---

“Do you know ANY High-Church at all you stupid boy?” Lanzerus said before clouting him in the ear.

“Ow! I know the four elements and the 'call' word.” Derrik said. “But that's all.”

“Do it then.” Lanzerus said crossing his arms. “NOW.”

“A-Alright.” Derrik said shocked at the man. 'Comes into the shop, asks for weird magic items then starts screaming at me to try magic then hits me, I don't understand.'

“Don't alright me. DO IT.” Lanzerus roared. “Or maybe you need a demonstration.” With a deep resonating voice Lanzerus spoke quickly in High-Church generating a spiraling ball of fire in the palm of his hand. “Now copy it or you will learn a very painful lesson about crossing Father Lanzerus.”

Derrik, being a smart boy, copied almost exactly what he heard, instead of the spiraling ball of fire he got more of an erratic line that spun crazily before extinguishing. “S-Sorry, I stumbled a bit.”

“It was, adequate, for the first attempt.” Lanzerus said. “Do you like the idea of playing shopkeeper for the rest of your natural life or would you enjoy more adventure?” Lanzerus said extending a hand. “Shake my hand, and you can learn magic beyond your wildest dream.”

---

“I still don't quite understand. You are a Goddess you have just as much magic if not more than I do. Why do you refuse to teleport?” Erin said still lugging the large bag on his shoulder. “ I mean as far as we know we are still going in circles, I am almost to my breaking point, and you haven't even begun to glisten.”

“Do you understand WHY teleporting doesn't work around me and Khaos?” Etoile asked.

“Because you are related to Sodia?” He responded.

“No. Have you paid attention to how you teleport?” Etoile said slowly. “You use tattoos as an outlet for your magical energy, you are using basic magical energy. Do you think that beings that radiate divine magic can be easily moved using THE MOST BASIC FORM OF MAGIC POSSIBLE!?”

“I got it.” Erin said covering his ears. “No need to scream at the pack mule.”

“Okay, I admit it, you can now apologize for angering me.” Etoile said before continuing forward. “Besides we weren't going in circles.” She pointed as they reached the end of the path, she pointed towards town. “And everything went as I knew it would.” She added.

“Mhmm. That still leaves me wondering, what prevents you from teleporting me?”

“Drop it or you will be eating this goddess' lightning.”

---

Cael woke up slowly, the rough sheets of the mattress was comparable to sandpaper.

Arric was sitting at the table, his backpack emptied of its contents sitting on the floor next to him. “When I tripped on the fragments of the gargoyle head.” He paused to lift up the jagged bits of broken vial. “The potions.” he stopped and broke into heavy sobs. “I didn't even get a chance to use them!”

Ash surrounded by a wall of empty glasses just looked up at him, and with a devilish smile. “You still owe me.”

“Guys, I really wonder will Cael be alright?” Verris said

“Cael is a tough uhhh...” Raleigh trailed off. “We have any word on the status of Cael?”

Arric just stared at the fragments of glass. “Tough...like the opposite of the potion vials.” He quickly wiped the broken vials off onto the floor. “ H-Sh- Cael will be able to handle anything thrown at...Cael.” Arric said carefully selecting his words.

“Aye, Clean that up I canna' have you leavin' broken glass an' pointy messes around my inn.” The man said while filling up another glass for a man sitting at the counter. “If ya do have the urge to break somethin' fragile go outside an' throw it on the ground.”

“You know, we never did get that artifact out of those ruins.” Raleigh said. “I also haven't seen hide nor hair of that bastard Lanzerus.”

“Now now, don't be in a hurry to run into him.” Arric said. “ The man is currently in possession of as far as we know, two artifacts, however that number could have easily grown.”

“Yes, and with that number growing so does his power.”

Kate walked down the Inns stairs a smile on her face. “Guys Cael is awa-” Before she could finish her sentence the four, the bartender, the bar customers, the bar's next door neighbors, the neighbor's neighbors and essentially almost everyone in town could hear the piercing shriek of a very very unhappy Cael.

---

Derrik looked at Lanzerus' hand. 'This man, how would I put it, is a freak.' “Look, I don't know what you are talking about, I little to no comprehension of High-Church.” He paused. “But I like the sound of Magic beyond my wildest dreams.” He quickly grabbed Lanzerus' hand and gave it a hard shake.

“Excellent.” Lanzerus said watching a green light slowly curl around their hands eventually melding into a sickly green glow that slowly faded. “The handshake is binding, if you so much as break your promise you will die.” He stared Derrik in the eyes. “Now, go pack and we will be off.”

“Right now? But the shop, I can't just-”

“NOW.”

---
HAHA getting back into the flow of daily posting! Only because I am somewhat sure I don't work tomorrow, er, today as it's now 1 am in the morning and I can't sleep :D.

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Comments

this story is sooo absurd.

I love it! What, I wonder, did poor Cael discover upon waking?

Poor Cael, the plaything of a goddess through her daughter.

Maggie

Cotton Candy

terrynaut's picture

I liken this story to cotton candy. It's light, fluffy and delicious -- melts on the tongue (mind) and leaves a great aftertaste (afterimage).

Thanks and kudos.

- Terry

'Cause now we have to wait

to find out what happened to Cael. Hopeful near the end Kate changes Cael's brain accidentally, eh?

This is without doubt one of the most off-beat stories on BC

Kim

Healing Mishap -15-

I am wondering if they are drinking Wacky Water or radioactive mushrooms.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

brewed

Sadarsa's picture

It's a Radioactive mushroom Tea, brewed with the finest Wacky Water straight from tap! :)

~Your only Limitation is your Imagination~

:D :D :D

OMG pls oh so very pls, pls with lovely sugary candy sweetness on top pls write more of this :D

"The light does not shine all the time so take all the time you can when it does" - Amaya The Night Rain

"The light does not shine all the time so take all the time you can when it does" - Amaya The Night Rain