Gwen Brown

What am I to do !!!!! ?

Yikes ! A man on Facebook, actually more than one, has have expressed interest in me, and when I started to tell him, he said he did not care. He is an ocean away, so there is relatively little risk he will just show up on my door step ... I think. Hmmm.

He looks quite juicy, like perhaps the Duke of Bath?

Now I am being put to the test. What have I been playing at these last nearly 10 years? Am I a woman or just in love with the idea? This will by necessity move slow as I am not about to buy or let him buy me a plane ticket to cross the pond, um just yet, me thinks. :)

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Stolen Stories

A few years ago there was an issue with Authors on this page having their stories stolen. And, sure enough, when I went searching, I found "MS Frankenstein" on a pay site. When I confronted them, the story disappeared, probably just to another pay site.

So, the issue is in the news again. It just makes me shake my head.

http://accrispin.blogspot.com/2014/03/pamela-wray-and-wordwo...

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Descriptiveness in stories

So, I've resumed working on two Sci Fi stories right now that have been in the oven for three plus years. I've been preoccupied with other activities that are both thankless at times and hard work, and now I feel worn out and bitter.

I've returned to writing full time, and want these tales to be wonderful. In College when I was taking creative writing there were lots of admonishments to describe, describe, describe. And I can only think of a few authors here who do a passable job of that, though many of the stories are entertaining, and fun.

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Be A Man

This spring or summer I want to go camping in the Oregon Outback and have found a place that is at least 40 miles from any urban lighting, on a plateau of some 5000 feet, in isolated solitude. In my youth, I loved amateur astronomy, and once had a small reflector, so plan to resume that hobby once again.

In the mean time, I must find ways to prevent any lights from coming on in my car, or cover them in red cellophane. Any camp lights I have must be red also.

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Needing to feel safe

I've been fully living as a woman a little over 9 years, but I know other girls here who have been at it for 15 or 20 or more years. Interestingly, if we aren't too self destructive, it is said that T girls live longer owing to the absence of Testosterone. I hope to see that played out in some of you.

Those who know me see me as this tough lady who is blunt but loving. A couple people that know me seem to want to take care of me and protect me, and I actually do enjoy and am thankful for someone caring about me.

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New Story

Much to my surprise, I have begun a new story. A few will not like how some words are spelled. Get over it. For the rest of you, this is very off beat for me and I hope that you like it when I finish.

Actually I do not care if you give me Kudos or comment on it either.

Gwen

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Seven Years

In two weeks, it will have been seven years since Sephrina recruited me to come to this site. I was a right mess when I got here. Looking at the Calender, it must have been the night that I returned from the hospital because of suicidal ideation, and had just been told that on the next day, Christmas Eve, I was being thrown out and installed in my own apartment, thus ending abruptly a marriage of nearly 40 years. By the time the divorce was final, it would be 40 years, 4 months. What the hell, this was supposed to be for life !

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Stary Stary Night.

There is so much peace in driving out through the desert, but I have never been out there in the winter. Sometimes I see pictures with snow out in the sage brush and wonder how it got there. We used to go out in the desert to camp. I loved looking up at the stars at night. Sometimes I would lay there under the jewel bright heavens and doze. Once in a while I'd wake up and look at the stars and I would notice that the Milky Way had swiveled a little. I remember that sort of like a time lapse movie. The nights when the moon was gone were the best.

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Windows 8, What?

So, I keep hearing more and more about Windows 8. Is anyone using it? What do you think? My Computer is "OLD", like 2009 old. It has a Window Experience Index of 5.1, what ever that is. An Intel Core Quad CPU Q8300 2.5 Ghz, 6.0 GB memory, 64 bit OS, and one TB hard disk, about half full.

I'm using Firefox unless I have to get on the VA and then I use Chrome.

Any ideas?

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Whining about my Bra

I've been on the 'moans for about 12 years now and can not bitch about my breasts. I think they are size B, at least one of them. You did know that breasts are not equal? My band size is 40 or sometimes 42. I should probably be slapped silly for complaining, but no one seems willing to do so.

My complaint is that in that size, the bras look um "serviceable", you know like Military Issue. YUK !!!

The pretty, lacy, pushupy, vavoomy, sexy ones only fit the little girls with like a 32 or 32 band. I am like totally green with envy. The BITCHES !!!!

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Zinnia Jones Trans ?

Or Lauren Mcnamara. She has lots of Youtube videos. I am not actually sure why she would reveal she is Trans. In looking at her videos, I am not sure why she would reveal anything at all about her past. She is bullet proof in my opinion.

She may be talking about Trans issues because her own presentation is so strong. Please take notice of her voice. The pitch is in the female range, and her inflection and resonance make so many of us seem like pitiful pretenders.

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Transgender Battle in the West

It seems from my perspective that the battle for rights is joined in a way I have not seen before, at least in the West. I know that in Washington DC there are those who are pressing for a Rights Bill, that this time includes Transgender folk. If you remember the old bill was called ENDA and it threw us under the bus.

To be clear, I think it is mostly the FtM folk who are driving this as they do not seem as easily cowed as most MtF folk, or perhaps I am the only one who is cowed.

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Openly Transgender Mormon Woman... I NEED help !

I was extremely surprised to find this on a TV Station in Salt Lake City. Part of the video refers to several transgender women living in Portland, Oregon. I am none of them. Lots of people here know my real name, it is no secret.

This article is also mentioned in a thread on mormondialogue.org. I am really sorry, just reading about it has upset me so much that it is obvious I can not participate in it at all. I think the tactics being used are absolutely despicable and likely to put genuine efforts back years.

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The best years we can have.

I saw a blog about De-transitioning and read the blog it referred to and the replies. Days later, it finally sinks in that while the circumstances surrounding my coming out and transitioning are dreadfully sad, and painful, the last few years are the best of my life.

It is wrong, just wrong for me to keep trying to be a gate keeper any longer. I just wanted to save people pain. But, what if in trying to save people pain, I just increased their pain?

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Tell me it's getting better?

Just feeling a little melancholy and shaky this morning, and I have to sleep before I get up at 7:00 AM. I've been approached my a PHD Doctor from a big local university who tells me that he knows that we have not been treated very well, and he wants me to help him make that better.

Those who know me, can confirm that I live a quiet life, and try to avoid the drama and hand wringing that makes so many of us miserable. I am no activist, not one bit. And, I am pretty much a prude, just trying to do the best I can to live like billions of other women.

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What the Hell !!!

I guess I will never understand the denizens of this site. "Severance Pay", has in my opinion ALL the elements that would make most of you go goo goo, yet the kudo count is low! How come?

I can see Authors not being impressed with my writing but this is beyond the pale.

G

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What if you are an Alien?

Are you an Alien? During a surprising encounter with a rather highly placed member of my faith last night, he made the observation that the reason I like to write about "good aliens", is that I feel like an alien. I immediately knew this to be true, though it is doubtful that the joy of writing stories that have good aliens will grow tiresome.

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Anyone here with heavy Psych background ...

I was wondering if there was someone here with a strong psychology background that could read a 34 page Facebook journal for me and give me their assessment. I think that someone has an adjustment disorder, and is possibly obsessive but am unsure about how to proceed.

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Story with dragons and worm holes

What happened to the story where this guy was dying and went down a worm hole and wound up a Princess with a pet dragon? It is recent within the last 6 months and I do not think it was finished. They were just getting ready for war with humans that had found them.

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Exchanging Story Devices

So, I have been an avid reader of mostly Science Fiction since the early 60's and one thing that I observed was that the various writers seemed to "borrow" each other's "story devices". I am reasonably sure that some of the sage and seasoned writers here saw it happening.

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Urinary Tract Infections

In August of 2007, when I went to Thailand to have SRS, I contacted a Urinary Tract Infection, post op. Who knows how it happened. It is a whole new world when you cut your primary defense against such things off and make it a Vagina. You go from at least several inches separation between the tip of your penis, and your anus, down to an inch or two. Ecoli is resident in your intestines, and in males it is less troublesome than in females. I had contacted a strain of Ecoli that is antibiotic resistant, perhaps due to poor sterilization of the tools?

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The Healing Process

When I heard this talk on "TED Talks", the woman's story surprised me by its practicality. There are lots of concepts and ideas there that can be used by us all. Many of those ideas are exactly what I had to learn in my own recovery.

I hope that many of you will find this as useful as I did.

Gwendolyn

http://www.upworthy.com/what-s-schizophrenia-like-a-woman-wh...

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