Some More Shopping

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Photo by Bruno Salvadori: https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-wearing-red-dress-standin...

 

Daaaaaddddd!!!!!

Ah, nothing quite as heartrending as the plaintive wail of a teenage girl confronted with an intolerable family situation.

"But Mom was going to take me…"

"Darlin' heart, you mother is sitting in the Detroit Airport, freezing her delectable tush off, staring out the big windows into the snow. She is not available to take you to the fitting for your prom gown. You will have to suffer through with your poor, benighted father as chauffeur.

"But it's not fair!"

"Indeed it is not fair. It is an intolerable injustice, a cruel plot by the Fates who weave the tapestry of your young life. Woe betide the…"

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

"What? Can't a father express his sympathy for his beautiful but grievously wronged daughter?"

"Why couldn't you be stuck in Detroit and not Mom?"

"Because your mother is the hotshot auditor and your father is the poor, underappreciated horticulturist who is firmly planted along with his plants."

"But Mom is the one who…"

"Now just a minute there! Tell me, what is the purpose of wearing a fancy gown to the prom?"

"Huh?"

"You aren't going in your birthday suit, so just why are you wearing a fancy gown?"

"Because it's… it's… just what you do!"

"And why are you doing it?"

"Jeez, Dad!"

"Let's break it down and apply some logic here."

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!! I hate it when you get all logical!"

"Is that gown being worn to impress you?"

"Impress? I just like it, fer cryin' out loud."

"OK, is it going to impress your parents?"

"Enough that you're paying for it."

"Conceded. Is it going to impress Brian?"

"It darn well better!"

"Ah! We're getting to the core of the situation now. Is Brian a male?"

"If you can't figure that out I have to wonder just how I got here."

"Smartass. Speaking of which - will Brian be impressed by your ass in that gown?"

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

"Now, since Brian is a male and your father is a male, it follows that your father will be able to judge just how impressive your gown will be, given that Brian and I do share some typically male characteristics."

"Brian isn't a pain in the ass, though."

"I'm wounded! Do me a favor though…"

"Yeah?"

"If you end up in the back seat of the car after the prom and you do something that causes a pain in your ass keep it to yourself."

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

 

Later at Kiara's Fashions

"Hi Brenda! I see you brought Cooper with you today."

"Huh? You know my Dad?"

"Of course I do. Coop and your Mom are some of my best customers."

Cooper and Kiara were rewarded with a confused look. How could a nerd like Brenda's dad be known by name at a place like this?

"Ready to see if the gown fits properly?" Kiara inquired.

"Uh, yeah…"

"Come on back, then."

Cooper settled into a chair, smiling at the look on his daughter's face. Sometimes a father manages to get one up on his daughter.

Some time later the curtains parted and Brenda appeared in her prom gown.

"Whoa! Very nice," was Cooper's reaction.

"I think it suits her very nicely," Kiara said.

"I hate to mention this," spoke the grinning father, "but I think you're going to need a different bra with that gown."

Brenda instantly turned as bright a red as her gown.

"What? You think your father doesn't know from bras?"

Kiara seemed to be having a difficult time suppressing her laughter.

Recovering herself, Brenda just wailed "Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

"Child… No, wait a minute! You ain't a kid any more if we gotta be talking sexy bras for you. Black, of course and something cut with a goodly plunge. Maybe some lace to peek out around the edges. Brian will certainly appreciate that."

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

"You could go with a color that would compliment the gown, I suppose. Color was always a nice bonus when I talked your mother out of her dress."

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

"Cooper, you are evil!" Kiara whooped, abandoning any pretense of neutrality.

"If you're such… such… a freakin' darn expert on bras, why don't you wear one?" Brenda stammered.

"Got one in my size, Kiara?"

"42D, right?"

"You got it." Kiara went back through the curtain.

"What the hell?" cried Brenda.

"I guess it's about time you found out. I'm a crossdresser, Brenda. I like to wear women's clothes, but I only do it in private. I make an ugly woman."

"But… What about Mom?"

"We often buy matching lingerie. What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom, kid. I'll let you and Brian figure out who wears the bra if it gets that far. Maybe you both will."

"Daaaaaddddd!!!!!"

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Comments

Laughing all the way through this one

BarbieLee's picture

Ricky, my pet, you were in top form when you wrote this one. I loved it. Finally a dad (male) whom wasn't afraid of discussing female unmentionables and attire. Obviously daddy has a great fashion sense. Was mom really trapped at the airport in a snowstorm? Inquiring minds want to know.
Hugs Ricky, beautifully done.
Barb
Life is a gift, don't waste it wishing you had.

Oklahoma born and raised cowgirl

Fun!

erin's picture

Sort of telegraphed the ending but that didn't make it less funny. :)

Hugs,
Erin

= Give everyone the benefit of the doubt because certainty is a fragile thing that can be shattered by one overlooked fact.

Tee hee

Very good, though thought first shopping was more of a surprise. Maybe if her BF had been called Jason it would have added a bit more misdirection, and meshed the 2 stories together.

Thanks for sharing

D?

Quite well developed. On the other hand the horticulturist probably know how to grow things ;)

Loved this, Ricky!

Emma Anne Tate's picture

Hopefully the daughter won’t freak out on him, but it looks like he’s got the situation in hand. :D

Emma