Dreams like that are powerful.

There are a lot of people who believe that everything that happens to us is our own doing. That's the "Secret".

Here another secret, that's a whole lot of nonsense.

I calculate risk. I've been doing it for five decades with quite a bit of success. I know about risk factors and probable outcomes.

In most instances, external factors far outweigh the internal (controllable) factors.

Think about driving. Insurance companies look at your credit scores, your driving record, the kind of car you drive, your age and dozens of other factors, yet they really can't control the other drivers on the road, the condition of the road, the weather, etc.

Those jerks back in grade school harmed you by their decisions that you were "different" and therefore fair game for their bigoted attitudes.

You might not have even known it at the time.

I didn't.

I didn't have a clue just how feminine the world judged me to be and how that has impacted my life.

It has cost me $millions and untold angst.

The first girl I ever loved as much as told me that I was feminine when she broke up with me. I didn't realize what she was saying until decades later. Going through my life I can match horrible things that occurred in my life to people reacting to who I am as a feminine person.

I'm fairly masculine in a lot of ways. I'm a large person and a fairly good athlete. I'm assertive when I need to be and a natural leader. Yet -- I'm undeniably feminine as you can tell by my stories.

I don't force my femininity on people, that I'm aware of, but it happens.

When my natural femininity creates problems for me, it's NOT because of who I am. It is because people are allowed to be jerks.

Bigotry is ugly and reprehensible.

Allowing bigots to make you feel inadequate is a normal reaction. People like Trump are masters at making their absolute bigotry appear to be sane and rational. It's not.

Your dream is your reaction to the bigotry you've felt and the pain it has caused you.

The first step toward recovery from the damage they've done to you is to call a spade a spade.

You're who you are. How other people react to you isn't because of your failings, but because of their flawed characters.

The fact that you're a feminine person didn't cause your pain any more than the fact that I parked my car on the street "caused" someone to break a window and steal it.

Every time you post you display a kind, compassionate heart. Your heart is beautiful. Those people in your dream should have been elated to be around someone as beautiful as you. Life should have been "easier" for you.

I apologize to you on behalf of a world who rewards greedy bigots while treating compassionate people as suckers.

Jill