I woke up with a deep gasp clawing at the air around me. Successive heavy inhales of the cold, damp air caused me to let out wild coughs.
I was disoriented but my back, the base of my skull and forehead all hurt too badly to ignore.
I recoiled from the pain and all my sensations coming back all at once. My hearing followed suit and I recognized the sound of heavy rainfall.

"Where am I?" I thought to myself trying to ignore the pain. "I feel terrible".

I made a move to open my eyes which also hurt and it took a while for them to focus. It was dark.
The only light coming in from the cave's single entrance was obscured by leaves and did nothing to illuminate the cave's interiors.

My heart sank.

My throat grew tighter by the second and I felt a single tear roll down my cheek.

"Jo, you're awake!" I heard Mikey's concerned voice and suddenly my tears flowed freer.

"No, no, no, no, no" I repeated under my breath till I lost count "Please oh God, please no!".

I scurried to sit up. I felt a sharp pain in my lower back but I didn't care. My fingers clawed at the bare stone below them. Piece by piece, my brain put everything together.

I never left the island. It had all been a dream.

▼・j61;・▼

My back was against the far cave wall providing much needed support. I had only heard Mikey's voice but I could tell the others were there. Ollie was there.

A flash of lightning illuminated the room confirming all my suspicion in a quick second. The entire group, the entire fucking group was staring at me. Concerned. It took all my willpower not to scream. The thunder that struck next was louder than I had ever heard it and it shook me to my core but I didn't react to it... or anything. How could I? What would I say? How could I tell them that only a second ago, I was back home, in the comfort of my family in the next room, kissing my boyfriend.

The tears flowed freer and now I let out audible sobs. The room was quiet as if waiting for me to finish.

"You okay there, Fahey?"

Doug.

I didn't respond. What could I say? I'm okay? I wasn't. I was far from okay.
I heard Mikey shuffle over to where I sat, I felt him take both my hands in his. My heart started beating quickly again. My tears had dried again on my face, I'm sure I looked horrible so I was happy for the darkness.

In the pitch black, it felt like we were alone. I felt him squeeze my hands and I shuddered. I leaned forward, tormented by the thought of doing this in this cave filled with all these people. But I had to do it. I had to kiss him. To know if at least that part was real.

I felt his warm breath on my face and I heard him swallow so I knew he knew how close I was. Our lips must have been inches apart when he loudly cleared his throat and let go of my hands. I heard him shuffle a little bit away from me and my heart broke.

"Are you okay?" He asked, his voice still filled with concern.

I steeled myself, nodded before realising no one could see.

"I'm fine" my frail voice croaked. My back went back to rest against the cave wall. That whole motion felt like retreat. Like I had truly lost everything for the first time since washing up on that damn island. "What happened?" I asked.

"Don't you remember?" Mikey replied "I guess you wouldn't. You missed your step and tumbled down that rocky path. I thought you'd be hurt way more than you were"

"I don't remember any of that"

"Yeah, we were both pretty out of it after..." he paused for an uncomfortably long second "after we saw the storm clouds gathering"

I know we made out. That part was real but I remember the ship, I remember us running back down the hill to tell the others. I don't remember falling. I remember lighting a fire and the group calling for the ship. I remember being saved. It was all so real.

"You've been out the entire day too, we were starting to get worried" I heard Tate say.

"Yeah and it's been pouring like this since then, it's crazy" Gabe added.

"The important thing is that we're all okay" coach Evans' voice sounded just as it did in my dream. "We're stranded here for as long as this rain keeps pouring like this but first thing tomorrow, we have to make plans to move Inland. The higher ground should protect us from the flooding we'll have to deal with when it rains like this. That clear?"

"Yes coach" the others chorused. All except Ollie and I. I hadn't heard a sound from him since I awoke but just the thought that he was somewhere in here was enough to put me on alert. It felt like so long since I'd seen him but I'd seen him just that morning.

"We'll use the garden as a starting point. We'll divide into groups like we've always done and set out in different directions looking for better and a more permanent shelter. Think higher ground. Any questions?"

"No coach" Tate replied.

"Good. Now get some sleep. We'll be getting up early. Long day ahead. Make no mistake boys, we'll survive this island and we'll get off it".

That was funny, I thought I'd already done that.

▼・j61;・▼

The rain stopped a few hours later leaving nothing but the soft chirping of the crickets. The others had long slept off after what I expected was a very hectic day for them and I had been left alone with my thoughts. My thoughts had drifted to my long dream that felt like it had gone on for days at least.
Why had it felt so real? I remember everything like it had actually happened. I remember getting done up and going to the mall with Gaby, meeting Clinton and Mick, Clarissa and Lindsey from school. Everyone had acted exactly how they would if it were real.

My attention turned to myself for the first time this evening. So much of my body hurt that it caused me to wince with the slightest shift. It must have been some fall.

Even in the dark, I could tell that my clothes hadn't been changed. The cropped blouse didn't offer much protection from the cold and neither did the small skirt. I thought it was weird how easily I grew accustomed to clothes like this but I felt even more at ease wearing these than I did that morning when I'd put them on. God, it felt like it had been days. I remembered dreams I had within the dream.

My stomach grumbled. I decided staying up and thinking wasn't going to do me any good. I would try to get some sleep. It worried me to think that I may dream again because as amazing as the dream was, waking up from it crushed me and I didn't want to go through that again.

I didn't think I would fall asleep so easily after what felt like sleeping for days but I did. I didn't dream that night.

▼・j61;・▼

I don't think I slept for long because it was still dark when I woke up. I could not sleep another second even if I wanted to so I made my first attempt to stand from the bare spot in the cave that I'd made home since I awoke.
I used my arms to guide myself up the cave wall and to my feet and I'm instantly hit with a splitting headache. I winced loudly before catching myself. I needed to be careful not to wake anyone up. I wanted to get out of that cave and be alone for a moment.

When I was sure I'd gotten my balance and wasn't going to fall, I let go of the wall and stood properly for the first time since I'd supposedly fallen yesterday.
I felt filthy. I was sure I looked worse. So I guided myself along the cave wall to the spot I knew I'd find the large pile of women's clothes.

I felt through the pile with my hands trying to figure out what was what. One hand touched one the tiny denim shorts that I'd become all too familiar with over the past couple weeks and another grabbed what I thought to be a cotton top.

I grabbed the sponge and hair brush and whatever else I thought I'd need which was relatively easy to do before tiptoeing out the cave. I took care not to step on any of the boys or worse, coach.

When I got out, I took in my surroundings starting with a large inhale of that fresh post-downpour air.
The sun wasn't out yet but it's rays had begun to shine over the horizon making the island just visible.
I'd just had a very surreal experience where a dream felt like reality but in that moment, I realised it wasn't. It was indeed a dream. That moment was solid. Everything had a sense of actuality to it that I realised had been missing before.
I had been on a trip with my school's football team. There was a crash. We were marooned on an island that in all honesty, wasn't as bad as it could be. We had learned to survive here. We would be setting out to find a better place to call home today. Those were facts. They were real. We hadn't been rescued. That wasn't real.

The more time I spent in that moment, the more I put everything into perspective.

A boy from school tried to rape me. That happened. That was real.

"What are you doing?"

I turned quickly to see Mikey behind me, rubbing the last bits of sleep from his eye. He wasn't wearing a shirt. Nothing but his tight shorts infact.
I swallowed hard and my heart beat faster.

"Nothing" I manage.

He looked down at my hand and saw a everything I carried in both hands.

"Come on, I'll accompany you" he said simply before leaving the cave's entrance and turning for the path leading to the spring.

"You don't have to" I tried to say but he was already walking down the path.

"It's still dark out" he said without turning back to face me "no way am I letting you go all the way to the spring by yourself. Now come on"

I followed.

▼・j61;・▼

We didn't say a word to eachother all the way until the spring was in sight.

"I'm glad you're okay" he said.

I turned to him. He wasn't looking at me but he had a very serious look on his face.

"When I saw you fall..." his voice broke off "I didn't know what I'd do if you'd gotten seriously hurt"

"I'm fine" I say softly.

"I shouldn't have been running so fast for you to try to keep up with me. I'm sorry"

"Mikey, I'm fine"

"You used to be faster" he added teasing.

I pouted. "I was wearing a skirt"

He laughed "well next time, I'll carry you"

My gaze fell to the floor. Why did I feel like this? Two days ago we were best friends and now my legs were weak just by looking at him.

He took a seat on one of the rocks and gestured to the water, "Well go ahead, I won't look"

"I want you to look" I said before I got the chance to stop myself.

"What?" He asked puzzled

"I want you to look" I said again. I couldn't believe what I was saying.

"Jo..." He began but I shushed him. I dropped everything I was carrying while maintaining eye contact with him. He didn't say anything but his eyes didn't move either.

I took off the blouse slowly and our eyes locked right after. Next I unzipped the skirt and let it fall to my feet. The only piece of clothing on me was the lemon coloured underwear. I stepped out of the skirt and started walking up to him. I didn't know if he was as terrified as I was but neither of us showed it.

"Jo..." his voice was soft and uncertain. I cut him off by placing a finger on his lips. My finger was replaced by my lips. I'm sure his uncertainty dissipated because his arms found my waist and pulled me closer. We kissed softly and time seemed to fade away. My hands moved to his face and framed them.

I was so confused.

I'd never felt like this with anyone before. I never wanted him to let me go but eventually he pulled apart. He walked a few paces away before turning back sharply.

"You understand that everything has changed right?" He exclaimed rhetorically "nothing will ever be the same between us ever again"

I didn't say anything. He ran his hand through his hair and his face looked like he was wrestling with a million thoughts and emotions.
He came to say something but didn't.
In several quick strides, he disappeared down the path leading away from the spring.

▼・j61;・▼

It took a while but I eventually got in the spring and it took even longer to get out. By the time I'd worn my clothes and combed my hair, it was very bright out. I expected the entire group would be well and about right now.

As I got closer to the cave, I got more and more nervous. I feared I had ruined everything between us. I mentally slapped myself for being so stupid. Mikey and I had been best friends since kindergarten. We talked about girls. He told me about all the girls he'd hook up with in college. He made me promise that I'd be his best man. What were we doing here?

The busy nature of the group pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Good, Fahey you're here" coach said getting my attention "we've washed the tomatoes, just cut it like you do so you can replant it when we get back"

"Yes coach"

"And hurry. We need to be ready to eat and leave when the boys get back with the apples" I nodded "damn rain" he continued "I could go for some fried fish right now but we're not going to find any wood dry enough to burn"

He muttered something under his breath before disappearing into the cave.

▼・j61;・▼

When they returned, I had my back to them diligently cutting away at the tomatoes like I learned back in agric. The boys had elected for something more exciting like shop but look whose elective was actually paying off now.

"Damn, so you're telling me that's really a dude's ass" I heard Doug say and I imagined that stupid look on his face but I didn't turn. "What? I'm just joking" he added and I wondered whether someone had given him a look or something.

We ate the small breakfast consisting of apples, slices of tomatoes and a piece of roasted rabbit and as soon as everyone had prepared and taken what they'd need, we set off.

▼・j61;・▼

The garden needed a lot of care but seemed to be in an alright shape overall. It had taken a beating from the long rain but good natural drainage had sent the excess water downhill and away from the crops. I made a mental note to ask if we could build some form of cover for the garden but that would have to wait because coach was already talking.

"Okay, we're going to split up here into the same groups we used when we first came here." He spoke and we all listened carefully. "Now this is very dangerous but it is something that we have to do. That cave was always temporary. Yes it's close to the beach which can be nice but it's too far from everything we need. If we find a good spot farther Inland, we lose proximity to the sea but we gain better access to the spring, fruit trees, game and so on."

I look over at Mikey who hasn't said a word to me since. He's listening attentively to coach and I suddenly feel embarrassed that even now, at a time like this, I can't stop staring at him.

"Now you're only going to walk for 30 minutes, no more. Make note of your surroundings and don't get lost! Under no circumstances should you separate from your partner is that clear?"

"Yes coach"

Everyone is working hard to survive and here I am, caught in my own head.

"Well good. Move out"

▼・j61;・▼

I walked sheepishly behind Mikey like I had since we split up from the group. It had been 20 minutes or more if I had to guess. There were no sounds except the sound of our shoes on the wet soil and the leaves rustling as we pushed them out of our way.

I bumped into him when he stopped abruptly. "Sorry" I say softly.

I feel like I had been walking on eggshells all morning because that's what our relationship felt like. An egg balanced on a tight rope.

"What is it?" I ask

He doesn't reply. He took a few steps forward and I follow. Just a few feet ahead of us was what was an obvious man made path probably made by excessive use.

The path was perpendicular to our position and either side of it led far out of sight.

"Wait here" Mikey said as he started walking onto the path to get a better look at where it led.

"Hey coach said we shouldn't split up" I protested.

"We're not splitting up, I just want to see where it leads"

"Let me come with you"

He sighed "you need to stay there to mark where we exited. I'll only be a minute just stay put"

He kept walking cautiously until he was out of sight.

Not even thirty seconds after Mikey had left, I heard the leaves rustle to my left. I turned to see something that stopped me in my tracks. An unkempt man exiting the bush to the far side.
His face looked dirty and his hair looked like it hadn't been combed or washed in a long time. His clothes looked horribly stained and he walked with a limp. When he saw me, he froze for a second before breaking down crying.

He begged for it all to stop and he seemed to be begging me to go away. I hadn't moved yet for fear of provoking him but I had to figure out a way to either call for Mikey or run to him.

Who was this guy? Where had he come from? This was the first person other than the group that I had seen in the last couple weeks. He was kneeling in the dirt now repeating "why won't it stop?". The man seemed disturbed and that scared me.

He was far enough from me that running was an option. The shorts I had on were very tight but I thought I'd be able to make it to Mikey at least.

Before I could contemplate what to do, another one came out of the bush in a similar state of disarray although he seemed a bit more put together.

He knelt beside the other man, "Ben, I see her too!" He exclaimed.

"You do?" The other man slowly began to calm down and a smile crept unto his face.

"I do. I do!" He repeated happily. Turning to me, the second man asked, "who are you?"

I felt my fear dissipate as it was replaced with relief. I knew who they were.

There's a lot to unpack here and a lot of story to be told over the next few chapters. I know there are a lot of questions but I hope that you will stick with the story to see how it comes together. Please let me know what you thought about this chapter in the comments.