A CHANGE OF STYLE PART 1   by NINA ADAMS   In this the first of four parts we meet Alex Adams as he begins his High School journey with the help of his friend Roxanne. His journey takes him places few boys have the opportunity to experience. His gradual acceptance of his changes helps enrich his life, but forces him to make some complex choices.

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IN THE BEGINNING

One of the few strong memories I have from my father was he telling me that I was very special. “Son, explore the world and never settle for just okay. Use your heart as a guide and you can be anything you want to be."

Shortly after that and just about a week short of my 11th birthday, he passed away. I loved my father, even though he had not been a real big part of my life. He worked so hard building his advertising business that I think he missed out on living and enjoying time with my mother and myself. I think his last wishes for me were a statement of his personal regrets. I was very young, but I vowed to always be myself and experience all that life had to offer.

I vowed not to lose sight of the world around me and became a very free spirited kid. I also enjoy developing my creative side and became enamored with the arts. I enjoyed painting, music, literature, and almost anything theatrical in nature. My father's words guided me much more than his actions.

School came pretty easy to me even if I did not fit in perfectly. I had skipped first grade so I was always one of the youngest kids in my classes. During my high school years I was not part of the popular click, but I did have some good friends and some social life.

I was not a great athlete, but I enjoyed running. As a freshman and sophomore I was on the school’s cross-country team. I found running to a good sport for me, because I was thin with relatively long legs. I was only about 5'7" and 135 pounds, but my long thin legs probably belonged on someone a couple of inches taller than me. I chose not to go out for the team my junior year, because it took so much time away from my other interests.

I live alone with my mother in the northern suburb of Chicago called Glencoe. Glencoe is a very small town that is right next to the Chicago Botanical Gardens. It is a pretty affluent community, but not overly conservative. My mother worked part-time at the Gardens, but mostly because she enjoyed it. My father had left a substantial nest egg, plus life insurance proceeds and a majority ownership in his agency. My mom would never have to work again, but as she was barely 40 she needed to keep herself busy. She was still a very attractive woman, but she did not feel the need to quickly find a new soul mate. I always thought she probably wanted to wait until I was off to college or until sometime after I had left the house.

My mother and I were very close. She pretty much single-handedly raised me so we knew just about everything about each other. She could read me like a book, so I kept few secrets from her. She was the only one other than some of my teachers that still called me Alex. Most of my friends just call me Lex.

It was during my junior year at school that I began making my mark in the fine arts. I took theater and chorus as my school electives and even had a small part in the spring production of the Beauty and the Beast. I was really just beginning to develop my interests and personal style. When I found something I liked, it usually became a passion.

When I saw ‘Billy Elliot’ at the Ford Center in Chicago I just knew I wanted to be in theater. Making it in theater became an important personal goal. It was almost an obsession. I even got my mother to flip for some voice in dance lessons to hone my theatrical skills.

I prided myself on not being a clone of every other kid at school. I made friends pretty easy, but I tended to dress and act in a somewhat nonconforming way. My naturally brown hair had been dyed black. My clothes tended to be for lack of a better term, kind of edgy. I wore a lot of strange or attention getting T-shirts and I wore intentionally torn jeans. I even wore a hemp bracelet that a cousin of mine had brought back for me from Jamaica. I did not stick too far out, but I did not look like every other kid at school.

Over the summer following my junior year I was lucky enough to get a job at the movie theater in Northbrook court. I think my knowledge of theater impressed the manager. It was only about 20 hours a week, but it provided me with some spending money. It was because of this job that I was lucky enough to get to know Roxanne. Roxanne and I went to school together, but hardly knew each other. I always had a crush on her from afar, but I had hardly spoken to her at all through our three years of school. She was part of the in crowd and I was not. She was a cheerleader and I was not a big-time athlete. I never really felt I was in her league.

Fate was on my side as we now both worked together at the movie theater. It was a lot of fun getting to know her and to my surprise she wasn't stuck up at all. She was actually pretty down to earth, and not what I really expected. We shared a lot of interests, including a love for theater. As the summer wore on we became very good friends. About midway through the summer, I got up the nerve to actually ask her out. I was more than a little nervous, because to be honest, I didn’t think she would accept. I am certain I caught her by surprise, but she accepted my offer to meet up after work for a Starbuck’s mocha. As beautiful as she was, I think I liked her more because she seemed so nice. Maybe she accepted because I was not one of the macho jocks that usually hounded her. With each passing day we seemed to get closer and closer and before the summer was over we were spending a lot of time together outside of work.

I think it was our third rendezvous when she asked me if I wanted to kiss her. I got a little flustered and said I was working up to it. She smiled and looked at me with that little bit of twinkle in her eyes. A few seconds later, I walked over to her and gave her a quick peck on the lips. She was not very impressed, and told me I would have to work on that. At least the ice had been broken, and I figured the next time I would do better. It was a little strange having the girl make the first move. She was so totally beautiful, but I had been content just spending time with her.

We talked a lot about what we planned to do our senior year and after high school. She loved music and dance, which was a big part of why she became a cheerleader. She wasn't positive about what she wanted to major in at college, but she wanted to combine her interests in music and possibly teaching. She had such a great personality that I was certain she would make a great teacher.

I expressed my interest in the arts and my desires to eventually find my way into theater. I was not certain it would be a career move, but I knew in my heart it was something I wanted to pursue. I told her about my voice and dance lessons and how I wanted to work on my acting skills during my senior year. I had not gotten involved in the theater department my first two years of high school and only had a bit part in the school production my junior year. It was very unrealistic to expect a big part in the senior year production, but I was hoping for something that I could showcase some of my new skills. Roxy told me she would do anything she could to help me.

I was grateful to have Roxy as both a friend and potential girlfriend. One thing she suggested to me was to change my hairstyle. She thought I had great hair, but was not crazy about me dying it black. She thought I should leave it a more natural color, but maybe give it just a little bit more style. Nothing radical, but maybe a little more contemporary look was her suggestion. She thought that if I wanted my hair to be more interesting, it would be better just to let it grow a little longer, than to dye it an unnatural color.

I reluctantly agreed with Roxanne and later told my mother of her suggestion. She was very happy that I no longer wanted to dye my hair black and told me I would look much better with a more natural color. However, she was not real keen on me letting my hair grow. My hair was already getting a little long and I was in need of a trimming. She made me a deal that she said was non-negotiable. If I wanted to let my hair grow I would have to go to her stylist every three or four weeks, and have her keep my hair in an orderly fashion. She would dye it back to its natural color and give my hair a little shape. She was adamant that I would have to start caring for it much better if I wanted it to stay long. I would also have to let Lulu cut my hair however she thought it would look best. If I was going to let my hair grow, it was not going to look like a mop. She said that Lulu had a great sense of style and was very popular with the more fashion conscious set.

I was not big on having to go to a salon few weeks to get my hair trimmed, but I was in no position to argue. She made an appointment for me a couple of days later. I told Roxanne about the agreement I had made with my mother and she thought it was fair. She said she also went to Lulu’s Solon, but was not lucky enough to have Lulu actually be the one to cut her hair. Lulu charged more than most of the other stylists and she was impressed that I was actually going to get my haircut by Lulu. That made me feel, somewhat better.

It was about a week before school was set to resume when I walked into Lulu’s Solon for my first appointment. When I met Lulu for the first time I was expecting to meet a much older woman, but she was probably only in her mid-to late 30s. She was very attractive and I could tell from her own clothing and personal looks, she had a great flair for style. If I was going to start reflecting a more interesting look, Lulu was probably the right stylist to help me achieve that.

She told me that she already knew about my agreement with my mother and seemed to know quite a bit about me. She told me that she had been cutting my mother's hair for about three years and had many opportunities to talk about me. That made me feel a little bit strange, but she had a disarming way about her. She ran her fingers through my hair and said after it got a little bit longer there would be a lot of great things she could do with it. She explained that I had really nice thick hair, however it had been damaged by the cheap dyes that I had been using on it. For the first appointment, all she was going to do was bring it back to its natural color and trim the edges slightly. She gave me a bunch of hair care products to help me restore and improve the quality of my hair. Either at my next appointment or the one after that she would try and give it a little bit more style.

When I left the salon that afternoon my hair was anything but stylish. It was back to its basic brown with a pretty non-descript shape to it. I understood her plan, but would be starting my senior year with boring hair. Roxanne was happy to see my hair back to its natural color, so I was not too upset with the changes.

I always loved Roxanne’s deep brown hair. Her hair was always so attractive and trailed about 2 inches past her shoulders. It had a very natural wave to it and looked great in almost any style she chose to wear it. My hair was too short to do very much with and her hair you could do almost anything with. It was kind of odd, but I was kind of jealous that Roxanne could change her look anytime she liked. Girls always have so many more style options than guys.

My mother had convinced me that entering my senior year of high school I also needed to upgrade my clothing choices. The torn jean look was okay on occasion, but she said I was starting to look like a cliché. It would be okay if I chose to wear some other edgy styles, but I needed to change it up a little bit. Unlike most of my friends, I did not have any brothers or sisters to help me pick out clothing. I had to rely on my own tastes, my mothers, or possibly Roxanne’s.

When Roxanne and I were finished with our afternoon shift she went with me to some of the more hip places in the mall. It was kind of fun going shopping with her. I had never really cared for clothing shopping, but it was fun going into the different places with Roxanne. We were shopping mostly for me, but every so often she would try on something as well. There were even a couple of tops that we both tried on. Many of the more stylish T-shirts and tops were gender-neutral. I ended up buying quite a bit of clothes and even a pair of oiled leather Dansko clogs. The clogs were so comfortable and Roxanne convinced me that they were very fashionable.

When I showed my purchases to my mother she was generally pleased. She said she might pick up a few things to fill out the wardrobe. She was really tired of me wearing the same old clothes over and over.

I had really enjoyed the summer, but was looking forward to getting back to school. I really wanted to work on my drama skills and look ahead to post-high school plans. I was also kind of excited to be entering my senior year of school with a new best friend; one that was so popular. We had grown very friendly over the summer and had even kissed on a few occasions. We had never taken it any further than that and I do not think it would be fair to say that we were going steady. Our relationship was more than just friends, but it wouldn’t be fair to say we were an Item. I was hopeful that the relationship would continue to evolve over the school year.

School got off to a pretty good start. I was especially excited to begin my drama and chorus electives. I really wanted to show off some of what I learned from my tutors. Ms. Joyce the drama teacher was quick to pick up on my enthusiasm in class. Near the end of our third week of class she mentioned to me before class that I seemed much more perky. I was not sure what she meant by that, but I took it as a compliment.
My relationship with Roxanne was still very friendly, but we had not seen as much of each other since the semester had begun. We would get together after school on some days and study, but we really weren't doing that much on a social basis. She had already begun her cheerleading practice after school and I was still taking a few of my voice and dance lessons after school. I was nearly done with those sessions and hoped that I would have more time for Roxanne and other school activities very soon.

It was time for me to go back for another hair trimming. I complained to my mother but since I was letting my hair grow I did not understand why I needed to go back so soon. She told me that Lulu would help keep it orderly and healthy. She told me not to worry since Lulu would probably not cut very much off.

Lulu was very pleased to see me after school on Friday. She told me that my hair was already looking much healthier. She asked me what I had in mind as I let my hair grow a little. I told her that I really did not know, but I wanted it to look stylish. I told her all about my desire to be in drama and that many actors and actresses had very stylish hair. I wasn't sure what kind of style I wanted, but I was willing to push the envelope, if it made me look good. I told her that I was hoping she might have some good ideas and I would be willing to let her do her thing.

"If you are willing to let your hair grow I think there will be a lot of things we can do as the school year progresses. We can try different styles and different looks. A majority of the hair that I cut is for women, but many of the styles look even better on guys. Great hair is great hair and I think we can have some fun with this as the school year moves along."

"I am not here for a girls hairdo, I am just looking for some more style."

"You need to relax. That is not what I am saying. Think about Johnny Depp. His hair is extremely stylish, but not in the typical mannish form. If you want to be creative you need to open your mind. Some of the very best cuts are actually androgynous. They look great on guys and gals and can be real attention getters. If you are just looking for a buzz cut or someone to just lop off your split ends, I can recommend someone else."

"I am sorry, I didn't mean to snap. I am just a little nervous having my hair cut here, but I trust you. I think we are on the same page. Letting my hair grow was originally my girlfriend Roxanne's idea."

"Is that the same Roxanne who gets her hair cut here?"

"Yes. We have been hanging out since the summer."

"She is a very pretty girl and has lovely hair."

"Thank you."

"I would guess her hair is about 3-4 inches longer than yours. As you've probably noticed, she can wear her hair in many different styles. I am not suggesting that you would want to wear your hair in all those styles, but the longer your hair gets the more options you will have. At the rate your hair seems to be growing, it would probably get to be about that length by Christmas."

"I really haven't thought about how long I wanted it to get. I really just wanted it to be more interesting."

"Today I think I can give you a little bit more style by just re-balancing your hair a little. I am going to leave the hair long in the front and on one side a little bit longer, but trim it a little bit more in the back area. I think you will like this look and as it grows out we will have a lot of new options. I think the shape will go well with your nice facial features."

She proceeded to wash my hair and to begin trimming it. She actually cut off more hair than I thought she was going to, but she said it was necessary to achieve the proper effect. I asked her if I could watch her cut my hair in the mirror, but she said she preferred that I see the new style all at once. When she was through with the cut she actually did a little trimming on my eyebrows. She said they were very much like my hair and in need of a little reshaping. She told me not to worry as she was only going to slightly change where they peaked. She then said, "I wish I had natural eyelashes like yours." That comment caught me off guard and threw me for a small loop.

Finally I had an opportunity to see my new look. I was a little shocked by my reflection. I had never seen that style on any guy or even girl for that matter. It was very unique and certainly not manly. I could not tell where she had trimmed my eyebrows, but they did look different. I told her I thought the style was a little effeminate, but she said that it was very androgynous and I would quickly get used to it. It was not what I was expecting, but I was looking for something a little bit different.

When I left the salon, I felt a little conspicuous. I took the most direct route home, because I was not sure if I wanted to run into any of my friends. I knew they would eventually see my new style, but I wanted to get some reassurance from either my mother or Roxanne before I did much socializing.

When I entered the house I shot straight up to my room. I opened my closet and started staring at myself in the mirror on the back of the door. I kept turning my head to get a view from different angles. I was not expecting a style that looked anything like this, but I was beginning to think the unique look was kind of cool. I thought it might slightly accentuate some of my more delicate facial features, but it really was stylish.

While I was preening in front of the mirror my mother walked in.

"I thought I heard you. I just bought you a few... Honey let me see you."

She had stopped in midsentence when she saw my face. She didn't look upset, but she seemed a little startled by my hair. She had me spin around a couple of times while she evaluated the cut.

"You look very different. Did you ask Lulu to cut your hair that way or was it her idea?"

"She did it all on her own. Why do you ask that? "

"I am not sure, but it is not what I was expecting."

"I was quite surprised myself, but I think I like it. Mom, what do you think?"

"You just look so much different. I think the cut is pretty and it obviously frames your face well."

"Don't you really mean handsome?"

"Well I guess so, but it is also very pretty in how it blends in with your eyes and bone structure. Your hair never has looked so interesting, but I never expected a style like that on my boy. How do you feel about it?"

"As I said, I'm getting used to it. It is a lot different than anyone else’s at school, but that is sort of what I was looking for. At first, I thought it was a little fem, but the more I stare at it the more I like it."

I am not totally sold on it Alex, but if you really like it then we will give it a chance. Remember you have to take care of it."

"I will… do you think Roxanne will like it?"

After a short pause, mother said, "Why don't you call her and find out."

With that I went up to my room and called her cell. She seemed happy to hear from me and I told her I got a new rad cut. She sounded excited by my description and anxious to see it. She said her family was going to be having dinner together, but we could probably meet after dinner at the Starbucks for a late latte’ or something. We decided to rendezvous around 8 PM.

I was still a little nervous to show off my new do, but I was also pretty excited to be seeing Roxanne on a Friday night. Most of our recent time together had been school related and on weeknights. I wanted to look my best for her and started looking through my closet for something to wear. It was the first time I looked at the clothes my mother had just brought to my room, when she first saw my new style. She had bought me some sweaters, slacks, and some long sleeve crewneck T-shirts in different colors.

I selected my new black jeans that I had picked out with Roxanne and I wore one of the new sweaters my mom had bought me. It was a very soft V-neck in light blue. It felt so different than my other tops so I looked at the label to see what it was made out of. The label said it was made of imported cashmere. I thought I looked pretty good and went down to have dinner with my mother. When I entered the kitchen she gave me another once over and asked me why I had changed clothes.

I told her I was meeting up with Roxanne later and wanted to look nice for her. I told her I really like the soft feel of the new sweater and asked her why she never got me cashmere before.

"Alex, cashmere is much more expensive and you had never really concerned your self with style before. This new you, is a lot different than the young man I am used to having around the house. Even your interest in clothing seems to have changed."

I was so anxious to see Roxanne that I got to Starbucks about 10 minutes early. I did not want to have my espresso drink without her so I just started out with a big cup of water. I managed to get the loveseat couch next to the fireplace; it was the most romantic seat in the coffeehouse even without the fire being lit.

While I waited for Roxanne I read an old People magazine that was left on the end table. I enjoyed seeing all of the famous movie stars in the magazine and sort of fantasized that I might be in there some day.

I was flipping through the pages when Roxanne snuck up from behind. When she came around to the front she gave out a very small squeal of delight in seeing me.

“Oh my God you look amazing. That style is so much better than the way you used to wear your hair. I love it, you look so cute.”

Cute was not the word I was looking for, but I was happy she liked it. She gave me a quick kiss on the lips, but it was more like a friend would than with true passion.

“Lulu is so phenomenal. I would never have come up with a style like that. It looks so perfect on your face. She is so open-minded and creative. I have a hard time seeing the old you in this image. I like the old you, but you wanted a more dramatic look and she brought it out. I’ll bet most of my girlfriends will love it too.”

I was happy for her enthusiasm and a little more comfortable that I looked okay. After the initial exchanges we settled into more traditional yapping. She told me about her cheerleading squad and how she was just named co-captain. She told me that school was going fine, but then upset me by saying that she wasn’t seeing anybody these days.

When she mentioned that she was not seeing anyone I sort of slumped. I know we were not a couple, but I sort of thought we were at least seeing each other. She was talking to me like one of her friends and not like a date.

“Well you are with me at least!”

“That’s true and I really do like you.”

That was the end of the conversation on dating and I felt a little disappointed. I certainly did not want to give up our relationship and I know that most of my guy friends would love to be out sipping a latte’ on Friday evening with Roxanne.

We hung out for about an hour and a half just talking about school and some of our classmates. I got the inside info on who was dating who and other juicy gossip. After my initial disappointment with our discussion I relaxed and really enjoyed shooting the breeze with her. Near the end of the evening she had a twinkle in her eye and said she had a suggestion but wasn’t sure if I would be up for it. After peaking my interest, she said she would save it for another time.

I was now too curious to let that pass and said; “Now you have to tell me. What’s your idea?”

“All right, you know how much I love your new style?”

“Yeah”

“Well you know I think it would look so great if you had an earring in your exposed ear. A lot of guys at school have one and it would look spectacular with your new cut.”

“I am not sure about that. I’m not sure it would look good on me and besides my mother…”

“I understand… it was a bad idea.”

“No, no it’s not that, I just never considered that before. Do you really think I would look good with one?”

“I think it would go great with your hair and even enhance your new stylish look. Some of the coolest guys have pierced ears.”

“How come you never suggested I get my ear pierced before? When I had black hair I was also trying to look cool.”

“Truthfully I really didn’t like your black hair that much. Your new style is so much better and I think a stud in your ear would look very cool. It looks great without it, but I know I would like it more with a small gold stud.”

“Roxanne, you know I trust you and you know I really like you a lot, so if you think so maybe I should.”

“Tomorrow is Saturday, we could go to the mall in the afternoon and have them pierce it at Claire’s. It doesn’t cost very much and they have some nice but inexpensive studs.”

“That sounds okay to me, but I think I better run it by my mother. I don’t have to tell her everything, but it’s just her and me and I don’t want to upset her.”

“That’s fine, I told my mother before I got my ears pierced also. Why don’t you run it by her, and if it is okay with her let’s plan on going to the mall after lunch. Maybe we can even meet up with some of my girlfriends. I would love to show you off.”

“I am sure she will say it’s fine, so let’s plan on meeting at Claire’s around 1:30 in the afternoon.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I am sure it if I tell her it’s what I want, it won’t be a problem.”

I walked Roxanne home and up to her door. I wanted to give her a big kiss, but before I had a chance, she gave me a long hug. It was not what I was hoping for, but I would be seeing her again tomorrow.

When I got home my mother was in the family room reading a book. She asked me about my evening and I told her it was good. She also asked how Roxanne liked my new haircut.

“She told me it looked amazing and that she loved it. She thought Lulu had done a phenomenal job and that I looked so much cuter than before.”

“She did, that’s interesting.”

“One thing she did suggest though, was that I get a stud in my left ear. She thought it would compliment my new hair and give me even more style. If it is okay with you, I plan to meet her at the mall tomorrow to get a stud. I told her I would run it by you first, but I am nearly 17 so l was hoping you wouldn’t have an issue with it.”

“I am not really keen on you getting piercings or tattoos. Unusual hairstyles are one thing, but getting a piercing is more serious. If you don’t like a hairstyle you can just cut it off or let it grow. If you pierce an ear it could get infected and could be pretty uncomfortable for you, in more ways than one.”

“I am not worried about a little pain and it won’t get infected if I take care of it.”

“When you get your ears pierced you have to wear your studs for at least the first couple of weeks. That means even if you don’t like the way you look, you will have no choice but to continue to wear the studs. If you don’t wear them, you easily could get a bad infection.”

“I am only talking about one ear and I don’t know why I wouldn’t want to wear it.”

“You already have a very unusual haircut for a boy and might not like the way the earring looks with it.”

“I am sure I will like it and I am willing to take that risk.”

“I am really uncomfortable with this. I am not going to tell you no, but I do have a suggestion.”

“Mom, I want you behind me on this, so what is your idea?”

“Well Honey, since your hair is so much longer on the right side, why don’t you get your ear pierced on that side. You will still be getting a piercing, but it will be less noticeable. After a while, if you like it, then maybe you could do the other one.”

“Mom that sort of defeats the purpose. If it is covered by hair, why even do it in the first place. Most guys get their left ear pierced, if they are only getting one pierced.”

“I still would rather you have your right ear pierced than your left. After the initial novelty of having a pierced ear wears off, you may want to have a somewhat less noticeable alternative.”

“If I don’t get my left ear pierced, I do not think I’m going to do it. I already told Roxanne that I was sure you would be okay with it and that I would meet her tomorrow at the mall. I really want to do it, but if you say no, I will listen.”

“I can’t believe I am saying this, but I have an alternative that may sound to you a little off the wall. Instead of going to get your left ear pierced, I think you ought to have them both pierced. That way, after the first couple of weeks passes you can choose to wear any nice studs you might have in your less noticeable ear. If that is okay with you, I will pay for the piercing and get you the higher quality 14 carats studs. With the good quality studs there is less chance of infection and they will probably also look better. Besides, no one will notice your stud in your right ear with your current hairstyle.”

“You really want me to get them both pierced. That seems like a bit much. It also may seem a little strange to Roxanne.”

“I think I am compromising pretty well. I would rather you not get either pierced, but if are going forward with it, I would prefer you do both. You do what you want, but if you are really asking me, this is what I think.”

“I will give it some thought and maybe discuss it with Roxanne at the mall tomorrow. I think I am going to go to bed now. Good night.”

“Good night Alex, I am really glad you came to me before you had it done. It makes me feel very happy that you and I can talk like this. Goodnight.”

I was very tired when I hit the sack, but it still took me a long time to fall asleep. So much had happened since school let out and my mind was still racing.

I woke up in the middle of some crazy dreams. I also noticed that when I woke I was very aroused. I could not remember the dreams clearly, but I remember seeing Roxanne and some of her girlfriends in the dream and I also remember having really long hair. I tried to remember more of the dreams, but I couldn’t.

Saturday morning I had a good breakfast with my mother and spent the rest of the time getting homework done. It made the time go by and I like getting it out of the way.

I played with my hair a lot before I left for the mall. I wanted my new style to look exactly as it did when I saw Roxanne the previous evening. The weather was still good so I wore some climber style shorts and a maroon T-shirt. The climber shorts were just past my knees and I thought they looked sporty. I also wore my new clogs, because Roxanne and I picked them out together. It took me a short while to get comfortable walking in the clogs, as they had a higher heel than I was used to. They were comfortable, but they changed my posture a little.

Just like the evening before I was first to arrive at our planned destination. This time I was exactly on time, but Roxanne was not there yet. I spent a few minutes walking around in Claire's by myself. I was asked by one of the clerks if I needed any help and I said I was just looking for the moment. I could not believe how many different styles of earrings they stocked. The clerk asked me again if I needed any help picking some out.

"I'm okay, I am just waiting for a girlfriend."

"Are they for her or you?"

"Well I am not sure, but probably for me."

"Have you seen any styles you really like? We just got in some great new sterling silver hoops. They would look great with your hairstyle."

"I was thinking more on the lines of basic cold studs. I have never had pierced ears before."

"That's okay, it is really easy and you hardly feel anything. Studs are a good way to start off, but if you buy a second pair the cheaper ones are half off. After the holes heal you might like the hoops or something a little funkier than the studs."

"I don't think so, but I am going to wait for my friend."

Almost on cue Roxanne came in with her friend Jessica. Jessica was also a cheerleader and almost as beautiful as Roxanne. Roxanne introduced me to Jessica who looked straight at me and smiled.

"He is so darling. Roxanne you are absolutely right, that style looks so cute on him. I wish I had hair like that. Lex that really is a great style. I wish more guys would be adventurous with their fashion choices. Maybe you will start a new trend."

"So Lex what have you decided? Are you getting a stud?" Asked Roxanne.

Just then the clerk came back. "So you must be her friend."

All three girls just looked right at me.

"I'm not a girl!" I exclaimed in an exasperated voice

The clerk looked truly embarrassed. "I am so sorry, we were discussing different styles of earrings and you have such beautiful hair. I am really sorry."

"So Lex which PAIRS did you like?" Roxanne interjected.

I was a little silent after the turn of events. The clerk said we were discussing studs and the sterling hoops.

"I never said anything about the hoops!"

"Why don't you discuss what you like with your friends and call me over when you are ready to get them pierced."

"Let me understand, yesterday you didn't want to get a stud and today you want to get both ears pierced. These changes in you seem to be on some sort of fast track."

"It was my mom's idea to do both. She wanted me to do only the right ear, but said it would be okay if I did both. It's kind of complicated, but she said it would be better in her mind if I did both."

Jessica said, “Your mom is right. With your beautiful new styling it would be silly to only have one earring. Having both done gives you so many more options, plus you have more styles to choose from."

I was getting a little overwhelmed by the discussion. All I wanted was a stud which Roxanne thought would look good with my new style. Now I was getting confused for a girl and being told it would be silly not to have them both done. I was nearly ready to bolt from the store.

Roxanne came to my aid and put her arm around my side. "Lex I know this is probably difficult for you but I still think a stud would look great. If you want them both done, I don't see anything wrong with that. Let's look around and pick out something nice."

I felt much better when she held me. We looked around until I found some very nice gold studs. We brought them to the clerk and told her we were ready.

"What about the half off second pair? The sterling hoops are a steal at that price."

"I really don't need any hoops."

Roxanne looked at me "I think you have had enough of a makeover for now. However those hoops are really nice. How about I buy them and hold onto them. If you ever want to be extra adventurous you can borrow them from me or you can have them."

"Well if you want them, then I guess that is okay."

A few minutes later I walked out of Claire's with pierced ears. They stung a little, but probably not as much as the whole shopping experience. My mouth was dry from all of my heavy panting and nervousness.

"I need to get a cold drink. I am parched and my lips are bone dry."

“Relax Lex, you look great. Jessica and I will treat you to an iced drink at the Starbucks counter. Then we can all hang out for a while and do some window shopping.”

“Do I really look okay? This whole experience has just been a bit much for me.”

Jessica was first to comment, “they look precious and so natural on your ears. I think it brings out your new style even more. I really love them.”

“I am not sure I would use the same description as Jessica, but I do think they enhance your new styling. At first I thought a stud might look kind of radical, but seeing them now, I think they look appropriate with your new cut. I think you will probably get a lot of new attention from the girls at school. I hope you can handle that.”

“Do you think they look manly enough on me? I don’t want to create the wrong kind of image.”

“I wouldn’t worry about being so macho. The cool thing about your new style and look is how it crosses all borders and is so nonconforming. It looks kind of androgynous, which some might call a gender bender look.”

“I know what that term means. Lulu also used that word in describing some of her hairstyles.”

“Lulu was right. Your look is attention getting because it is unique and pushes the style envelope. You were looking for something more dramatic and now you have it. You wanted something outside the macho mainstream and now you have it. Maybe down the road you can create some new even more style forward look. I think for now it looks very cute and you should just chill out.”

“Let’s get that drink my lips are chapped.”

Jessica pulled out a lip balm. “I’ve got some lip balm that should help you…. Come here. Now pucker your lips.”

She guided some fruity tasting balm on my lips.

“That should feel and taste better. It’s quality shimmer I bought at Ulta.”

“What’s shimmer?”

“It is nearly clear lip balm with UV protection. It adds a little glimmer to the lips and almost no color.”

“Color! I don’t want lipstick.”

“Chill! It is not lipstick. Here look in my compact mirror. All it really does is provide Chapstick with some gloss. Look…”

I could see the shimmer and what appeared to be a little sparkle in my lips. It wasn’t that different, but I would rather not have had any gloss.

We sat at one of the few tables next to the mall Starbucks. We relax for a few minutes sipping our drinks. The conversation was a lot like the one I had experience with Roxanne the night before. It revolved around school, gossip, but added a little extra about clothes and boys. The last part left me a little uncomfortable. They were discussing some guys that they clearly had some interest in. They didn’t stay on that subject long whenever they remembered I was sitting next to them.

Jessica commented on my choice of fashion, “with your new sense of style we ought to help you pick out some new fall clothing.”

“Thank you, but I have just bought a lot of new stuff and really don’t need anything more.”

“Well if you are going to want to start hanging out more with us girls, you have to realize you can never have enough clothes.”

We all chuckled a little at that last comment.

“I like your clogs. I have a similar pair. My pair is red, but they also come in lots of different colors and some fun variations.”

“That’s nice. They are pretty expensive and I don’t need another pair yet.”

“I’m just checking and besides, Roxanne said you have a birthday coming up in just over a week.”

“Roxanne!”

“I think your birthday was yesterday when your new image emerged,” quipped Jessica in an attempt to be funny.

“Enough already, stop teasing me. Roxanne why did you tell Jessica about my birthday? I wasn’t planning to do anything.”

“That’s why. I thought it might be fun to get together with a few of my friends next weekend and have a small celebration. Nothing crazy, just you and a bunch of hot girls. Do you think you could handle that?”

“Well of course, but you don’t need to do that.”

“That’s what friends are for. It will be something new for you. You will find out what it’s like to be at an all girl party. It should be a really special experience.”

“Well I’ll be there.”

“You know what I mean. It will be fun and you might get some silly gifts. Today I think we will just do some walking around the mall and maybe we will get some birthday ideas for you. At a minimum, you can help pick out some things you like for Jesse and myself.

“That sounds all right, but you really don’t need to get me anything.”

For the next 2+ hours we were in and out of practically every store in the mall that sold clothes. I felt very weird at first going into some of the stores. I would never have ventured into any of the stores without a girl at my side. I would have had no reason to. They browsed through the racks of clothes and even had me look through some of the clothes with them. They insisted that I pick out some of the styles I thought would look good on them. After a while I began to feel somewhat less awkward about being there.

In a few of the boutiques I had sales girls come over to me just like at Claire’s. No one gave me any trouble, but they all wanted to see if they could help me find something. One of the girls came over to me at Bebe’s and said I was looking at the wrong rack.

“I’m just browsing with my friends.”

“That’s perfectly okay, but none of you are as big as a size 12. Your friends are probably fours and you are probably no more than an eight. Those racks are right behind you.”

I did not even know what she was saying, but I think she thought I might be looking for myself, which made me very defensive.

“I’m with them and just killing time, thanks anyway.”

“That’s fine, if you change your mind I would be glad to help you.”

“Lex, see anything you like?” Roxanne inquired.

“Everything is very pretty, but I don’t know anything about girl stuff. It’s not as simple as guy clothing. I don’t even know what I’m looking at.”

Jessica cut in; “think of it as an adventure. It’s all-new to you and we can be your guides. After spending time with us you will become a pro at this.”

“I don’t think I need to be a pro at this.”

“You never know. It could come in handy with your girlfriends.”

“That’s true. By the way, the sales girls called me an eight, what does that mean? “

Both girls giggled a little.

Roxanne walked over to me and showed me a label. “Sizing in here is different than at a place like sports authority. It’s not small medium large in here. Sizing is more like 2-4-6-8 etc… The clerk probably was just pointing out that if you saw something you like for someone about your size it would probably be a size 8. Some stores use other types of sizing and I will explain all of those to you as you need to know.”

“So she was telling me I’m an eight in girls sizes!”

“I was not listening to her, but I guess so. If you did see something you like, it would have to have an eight on it.”

“Not likely, there’s nothing for me in here.”

“For someone as fashion forward as yourself, you sound very close minded right now. Pants are pants, T-shirts are T-shirts, I don’t expect you to pick out a cocktail dress, but you never know what you might find on the racks. That is why it is fun to shop.”

“Yeah, but everything is so girlish. I doubt I will find anything I could consider. I think I will focus on stuff for you.”

“Suit yourself, but keep an open mind. That’s one of the things I really like about you. In front of you are capris that are on sale. Look at that tan pair. Those are not much different than the short you are wearing right now. I am not saying you need or should want those capris, but I bet they would look pretty good on you.”

“I get your point. I will keep an open mind, but as I said I really don’t need much.”

The rest of our time shopping went better, I found myself looking at the racks for gender-neutral items. Initially I was looking at clothes for the girls, now they had me casually flipping through clothes that I might consider for myself. By the last store we went into, a boutique called Cusip, I instinctively walk straight to the size 8 discount rack. I pulled out a few T-shirts, held them up, and then quickly put them back. There was no way I was going to say I liked something for myself even if I might have.

We had hit virtually every shop at the mall and it was time to leave. Jessica had driven to the mall and volunteered to give me and Roxanne rides home. On our way out we ran into two more of their friends, Amy and Lauren.

The girls ran up to them to greet them. They exchange the ritualistic hugs and started chatting at 100 mph. When I made my way up to them they looked at me and said, “You must be Lexi.”

“Lex, not Lexi, why should I be surprised you know my name.”

We got introduced and they gave me a hug as well.

“Anybody find anything that was must have?” Asked Amy.

“Mostly window shopping with Lex. Kind of showing Lex what it’s like to do a Saturday afternoon at the mall,” said Roxanne.

They all sort of smiled at her comment.

“But Lex did get his ears pierced. Show them Lex.”

I turned so they could see my left ear and put my hand to my ear as if they needed a guide as to where to look.

Jessica looked at me and said, “lift up your hair so they can see them both.”

I was not happy with her insistence, but complied begrudgingly.

“They do look lovely,” was the first thing I heard, which came from Lauren.

“Getting both done is so much better than one.” Added Amy.

I had enjoyed spending time with two very beautiful and popular girls, but was ready to go home. “I think it’s time to go. I got some things I need to do at home.”

“We wish we had met up with you earlier. I would have enjoyed spending time with you Lex,” mentioned Lauren.

“Maybe another time Lauren, it was nice meeting you both.”

Jessica shuttled us home and dropped me off first. I thanked her for the ride and spending the afternoon with me.

“It was my pleasure. I think we are going to be good friends. It was fun shopping together. We didn’t buy much, but maybe next time you’ll find something for yourself.”

“Thanks again,” I said as I closed the car door.

I walked into our empty homes and grabbed a Diet Coke from the fridge. It was the first time I had time to sit back and really think about the whole turn of events.

I was enjoying spending social time with Roxanne and her friends, but it was a pretty unusual and an almost surreal experience. She was treating me like a best buddy, but definitely not like a boyfriend. Her friends were also very social, but not in any sort of flirtatious way. I had some new friends, but very different than I ever had before. I liked being with them, but it was a very new experience to me.

I did not want to admit it, but having the small peek into their world was enjoyable. It was a little embarrassing at times, but still how else would I have had the opportunity to be with so many cute girls. I didn’t think I would tell any of my guy friends about the activities, but maybe they could see me at school with my new acquaintances.

I made a quick stop in the bathroom and while I was washing up I started looking at myself in the mirror again. I still had some of the gloss on my lips and I was mesmerized by how my ears look different with the studs. As I shook my head right to left I realized that some of the gender confusion was not far-fetched. From my neck up, I could easily be mistaken by someone not looking at me very closely. I liked the image, but with the earrings my look was definitely androgynous. It was the first time I was a little nervous about going back to school on Monday.

Just after 5:30 my mother returned home with some carryout food from our favorite Italian restaurant called Hole in the Wall. She had a pasta dish and a big salad for us to split. When she saw me she let out a soft “oh my.”

“What mom?”

“You did it.”

“Did what?”

“You got your ears pierced.”

“I said I was going to.”

“I know, but I thought you might not when I asked you to do both instead of just one.”

“You said it was all right… and I did them both like you asked.”

“I guess I am glad you listened to me, but I somehow thought that when I suggested that you do both or none, that you would do none.”

“Mom! That is not how I took it. You said it was okay so I did it.”

“You are right, but I was hoping I might change your mind. With the new haircut and all, I thought you might reconsider.”

“I thought about it, but decided I wanted the total look.”

“You certainly got that. I hardly recognize you with your hair and earrings you could be mistaken for a… Alex, what’s on your lips?”

“Roxanne’s friend Jessica, put some lip balm on my chapped lips it helps a lot.”

“Your lips are glimmering and they appear redder.”

“It’s all she had and it’s basically clear.”

“If you say so. Your new look is going to take some time for me to get adjusted to. Are there any other changes I should know about?”

“Like what, Mom?”

“Nothing, it’s just that you seem to have quickly adjusted to some very big changes.”

“I’ve made some new friends and they all seem to think this new me is better than the old one. At least for now, I am enjoying it.”

“Okay Alex, let’s have some dinner. We will deal with this new you as it comes.”

“ It’s still me. Please don’t worry.”

Saturday night I just stayed in and watched a movie. There really wasn't much on, so I watched the original high school musical for the second time. I seemed to enjoy it more this time as my appreciation for dance and singing was on the rise. The story was pretty sappy, but I really enjoyed the production. I even got up a couple of times and tried to follow along with the dancing.

Later in the evening I did some surfing on my computer. My first stop was Roxanne's Facebook page. She had posted that she spent the afternoon with friends, including one special friend. The last post made me get excited. I was not a Facebook friend of Jessica, but I went to her page anyway. It was marked private, so I could not tell if she had said anything about the afternoon. I decided to add her as a friend. So I clicked the button and asked to be friends. I sent her a brief note thanking her again for a fun afternoon.

My own page was nothing special. I had about 25 friends with Roxanne currently my only girlfriend. I decided to update my picture with my new look. That way some of my friends would not be so surprised when they saw me at school on Monday. I took some photos with the Photo Booth feature on my MacBook. When I felt I had a good one, I posted it to my Facebook page. I also made it my profile shot. I updated my recent activity board to say that I had an amazing afternoon with extra special company. I really wanted to mention Roxanne's name, but thought better of it.

The next morning I slept in. After breakfast I logged back into Facebook only to find I had multiple messages and friend requests. Jessica accepted me and there were 10 other girls from school requesting my friendship. I was in heaven. Most of the girls were in Roxanne's friend list, but I did not even know a few of them. I wasted no time adding them to my friends.

I also received some messages from some of my guy friends. None of them were nasty, but they were mostly good-natured teasing. Included were comments like, "When did you take up modeling? Did you get run over by a beauty salon? Who put you up to this?" They were not ringing endorsements, but I wouldn't expect any guy friends to tell me I looked really good.

One of my closest friends, Sam, asked if he could come by in the afternoon to see me firsthand. I texted him on my phone and told him to come by after lunch.

The new change of style had certainly created an avalanche of activity on my Facebook page and apparently in my social circle. I was enjoying the notoriety.

Sam came by after lunch and my mother sent him up to my room, because I did not hear her calling me. When he saw me he looked at me with a forced stunned look, "so it's for real!"

"Of course, I got it cut Friday."

"And the earring, where did that come from?"

“I was out with Roxanne yesterday and she thought it would be cool with my new style."

"You were with Roxanne! What for?"

"Since we worked together this summer we have been hanging out together. She's amazing."

"I can't believe you hang with Roxanne. She's a babe. But that cut is so weird."

"I think it is stylish and very edgy. I already got over 10 Facebook friend requests from girls at school. How's that for weird."

"That's cool, but I still think you look kind of swishy."

"It's called androgynous. Think Johnny Depp."

"Well if you make a lot of new girlfriends don't forget me."

I did not tell him about my afternoon at the mall only that I hung out with Roxanne. We chatted for a while about guy stuff like sports, but for whatever reason it was not as much fun as chatting with Roxanne and Jessica. We played a few video games and he left in the late afternoon.

After he departed I check my Facebook page again and had some more hits. Four more girls had added me, and even three popular guys that I was not that close with had requested to be added. One of them had commented that I had more cute girlfriends than him, so he figured I must be okay. Another male friend asked for an add, and only said, I must be pretty brave. I approve them all and now had over 40 friends. Life was looking up.

I was more at ease about going back to school Monday, but still a little apprehensive. Around 9:00 pm, I got a call from Roxanne. My heart skipped a beat when I realized it was Roxy. She asked if I would like a ride to school in the morning with her and Lauren. I was thrilled by her invitation and calmly said, "It would be very nice."

She had never before offered me a ride to school, and it would certainly be good for my revamped image. It had been a great weekend and I was strangely looking forward to Monday. I dressed down on Monday morning to tone down my new style. I wore some Blue jeans and one of the dark green new T-shirts my mother had picked up for me. I figured my hair and ears would be enough attention getting for one day. I was so right.

The ride to school was short and there was not much time for conversation. Roxanne knew that many of her friends had been to my Facebook page. She was pleased that I posted my new profile shot. She reiterated that I look very cute and told me to relax and just go with the flow. She said some blockheads might give me a hard time about my new style, but that my friends were with me all the way. She said she would hang with me in the halls whenever possible and a few of her friends planned to do the same.

“I realize that I encouraged you to make some of these style changes. I can see that you are happy with the changes, but I want to be certain that it does not cause you any problems or discomfort. I think you'll find most girls supportive, but some insecure guys may be hard to be around today. Think of your day as theater with each part a different act. Let's meet up after school so you can update me on your day."

My nervous excitement was not misplaced. The day was full of ups and downs. I received lots of encouragement and complements from girls in my classes. I received a few too many comments like, “I look very pretty.” Fortunately, most of them were given in complementary ways. I think some of the students thought I changed my style as a social statement. I guess in an indirect way I had, but it was really just about taking on a more dramatic or artsy look.

I received very few positive comments from guys, but then I never expected any. Two kids that I knew were gay, made a point of telling me I looked fabulous. A lot of guys gave me an uncomfortable stare, but only one Neanderthal called me a faggot. This kid was such an idiot, that I took it as a compliment that he insulted me. The hardest part was seeing my closest male friends. I had already spent time with Sam, but Chris and Jake were kind of distant to me. I cornered Chris later and he said nothing was wrong, however, I could tell he was a little confused by his friends make over. All in all the day went well and I enjoy the company of all of the girls.

After school I met up with Roxanne and she gave me a big hug right in front of the school's main entrance. It felt real good, because it was so visible to my classmates and because of how I felt about her.

Roxanne asked me about my day and was very pleased that it was mostly good. She then invited me to a gathering of her friends in honor of my birthday. She did not know how many of her friends would be there, but it would be a girl's Saturday +1. Some of the girls would be sleeping over, but I was invited just for the evening festivities. She told me to come by at eight o'clock. I was on cloud nine and there was no doubt I would be attending the get-together.

I headed home to tell my mother about my day and the party on Saturday. She seemed relieved that school went smoothly. She was keenly interested how my classmates reacted to my newfound style. I think she expected more critical sentiment.

"Mom, today people are just freer to express themselves. It's not like we live in some backward little town, you practically have to be different if you want to make your mark. Most of the students didn't even blink an eye."

"That's good honey, I was worried that you might have been uncomfortable."

"I was fine, in fact, Roxanne invited me to a get together with friends at her house Saturday. She wants to celebrate my birthday, which is a couple of days later.”

"Roxanne seems to have taken quite an interest in you, since you styled your hair. She seems like a nice girl, but be careful so you don't get hurt or disappointed."

I won’t mom, I do hope the relationship becomes more, but she is introducing me to a lot of people and I'm having fun."

"Just be careful."

The rest of the week I settled in to my regular routine with the exception of chatting a lot with new friends. Some of the girls did some probing of my interests. "What's your favorite color?" Or "do I wear pajamas to bed?" There were lots of weird questions.

My relationship with my guy friends seemed to improve after a brief cool period. I think they realized that a lot of girls were now giving me the time of day. I still got an occasional strange looks from the guys, but the negative comments became less and less.

I was anxious for Saturday to arrive. I was clueless about the party’s activities. All I knew was that Roxanne would do her best to make me feel happy and a lot of her friends were already being friendly to me.

 

*          *          *
 
End of Part 1
 
 
To Be Continued...