Rage

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Who Am I?

So, someone talked me out of Islam, then my nose ring, and my second piercing in my ear, and my Hijab, and I wanted a tattoo but can't and now I wonder what will be left when I am made suitable? Doesn't anyone want to know me, or do I have to be just like "them"? Is this too much to ask? Am I simply a slave to others, is this enough, will they whip me and chain me too?

How is it that others are made uncomfortable by us just being ourselves? If we do not fight, does our light have to go out also? Do they not understand that there is so much more ahead if we trudge fiercely on?

Rage.

“Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”
By Welsh Poet, Dylan Thomas.

I learned from my doctor that in her opinion, I have early Dementia. I also learned from others that it is possible to greatly slow the progression of the condition. I go to fight on.

Gwen

Comments

Fight

Daphne Xu's picture

By all means, fight it. If you figure out how, tell me.

-- Daphne Xu

Have I EVER asked or required you to change anything?

I have ALWAYS tasked you to find within yourself, acceptance and the strength to BE yourself! You don't need some cockamamie religious cult to tell you who to be or what you should wear or even how you need to behave!

I've ALWAYS accepted you just the way you are and that will NEVER change! Maybe you should examine what these "groups" require from you before longing to belong to one of them?

Just be YOU, Gwen. That's all I want from you, all I need from you and all I want you to be! You are my dear, trusted friend and it hurts me that you go out questing for the one thing you don't need! That one thing is to be satisfied within yourself that you are who and what you need yourself to be!

You don't need to change one damned thing to be MY Gwen! I don't care how you dress or how you behave...well...within sensible reason of course. LOL!

I love and trust you Gwen, and I think you just need to accept that you are who and what you ARE and stop searching for some unfindable, indefinable whatever. BE the best Gwen you can be and let the chips fall where they may! Someone won't like you? Screw 'em! Someone might make fun of you? Screw them too!

As for early dementia...I've always thought you were nuts anyway and it was nice to have someone I could share my craziness with! LOL! Besides...sanity is WAY too boring and confining! Seems to me that, in history, the greatest minds have always been thought of as crazy by their contemporaries.

Or... as my father used to say: "There are none sane, save for thee and me...and I am not so certain about thee."

In closing, let me repeat: You don't have to change a damned thing to please me or anyone else! The only way changing something is right, is if it benefits YOU! People will accept you AS YOU ARE, if you just stay true to yourself.

All my love and concern,
Cathy

As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script. Y_0.jpg

It Wasn't About You.

I was just practicing creativeness to come up with another story. A certain group of people here, where I live are really into conformity, and I rebel against that.

Gwen

Best way I know of to fight & slow so many problems...

This is very best way I know of to fight off and slow so many problems...

Of course nobody believes it. "Too simple." "Too radical. "Can't possibly work." The only people who who believe in the results are the folks like me who have done it, are doing it, for months, years, decade(s).

Here goes: just stop eating animal products, and drop your fats and oils quite low. Eat healthy foods (see below). That's it. (OK, I hate exercise, but all these sites say 'do it'.)

It works because you are (finally) properly feeding your brain, and your whole body. You stop clogging up, and maybe start opening up, your arteries, so your brain (and your whole body) gets oxygen and nutrients, and can clean out whatever crud that it can.

Here's the how-to, why-to, and backing information: All is >free<, unless you want to buy a book that your libraries don't have, or go to a seminar or in-house program.

Start here: https://kickstart.pcrm.org/en. >Free.<

Much more here, grouped by topic/"dis-ease", including a section for doctors: https://www.pcrm.org/ >Free.<

2,000+ videos that are subject (including dementia) searchable 3-6 minute health videos here: https://nutritionfacts.org/. >Free.<

Forks Over Knives has Alzheimer's info link on the home page: https://www.forksoverknives.com/. Their easy (low gore) documentary is >free< here: https://www.forksoverknives.com/the-film/ >Free.<

And one more: https://www.drmcdougall.com/
---
No 'weird'/exotic foods. Hardly any counting. Nothing 'special' to buy, unless you want to try it. Everything you need is in a typical grocery store/supermarket.
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One single risk: If you are already taking insulin, diabetes medications, or blood pressure or anti-cholesterol drugs, your health may improve so quickly that yesterday's proper dose might be today's overdose. If you are on medications, work with your doctor >every day< as you change.
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I'm not selling anything, I get no 'kickbacks' or such. All I get out of this is a healthier, happier >you<, maybe some more stories, and the joy of helping you out.
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(Open) heart surgery >does not< feel good, and carries a death risk. Maybe you get to delay/avoid that as well.
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"Satisfaction guaranteed, or your old 'health' back."
===
PS: Keep this response in mind: "I am X (or Y, or Z...). How is this a problem for you?"

Who

Erisian's picture

Fight on dear Gwen - and remember that to answer 'Who am I?' is a mix of analysis and choice, where the past may offer examined insights but has a tendency to fail at properly addressing the 'now'. Who you were is not always who you -are-. Who you are is someone we love as is. Always.

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