Echoes- Part 3

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Chapters 6 through 8.

Now that Miriam knows the truth, can he better cope with what's happening? Or is a breakdown unavoidable?
Some questions are answered, while some new ones are asked... oh, yeah, and barbecue!

Pseudo-spoilers, careful!!!

Since everybody seems to like part II so far, I thought I might as well go ahead and include part III! Unfortunately, this is all the completed chapters I have churned out so far, though I've got a good start on chapter 9... okay, a few paragraphs... oh, all right, all I've got's the chapter title, but I know what's gonna happen! :P

This part- just like the last- has not been proofed, nor has it been "test read" by anybody other than myself, so yet again, if you have a suggestion, make it! Who knows, maybe your suggestion will be part of a future rewrite! Notably absent from this section are any flashbacks or "mysterious voices", but don't think I've forgotten them!

Oh, and the final note, yet again (I do a lot of these, don't I?) Those who find a particular late-story conversation between Miriam and Lindy to seem stereotypical, I promise you, this is based upon my personal experience and, in general, pretty much true.

Well, enjoy!!
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Chapter 6: Divine Discontent

"This sucks."

"Hey, young man. You promised me last week you'd give it a try. I haven't been to church in years, and to be honest, I think it will do the whole family good." Felicity looked pointedly at Miriam's Dad as she said this.

"Don't look at me like that, I didn't say anything!"

"No, but I know you were thinking it, Bill Loksley. If I catch you sleeping through the sermon like I did last time we were in a church, I'll have your head."

"Oh, come on, I don't snore THAT loud, sweetheart. Besides, that preacher was boring."

"Yes, but it made a bad impression on my parents when we took vows and you had drool all over your tux."

Miriam just rolled his eyes as he pulled himself into the back of their blazer and idly scratched his chest. This was going to be a very long day.

<=====>

"Bill, put that away!"

"But honey, I promised I'd have this report done by-"

"I don't care if you're writing the next great American novel, either you put your PDA away and pay attention or I'm throwing it in the baptism tank."

Despite his reluctance, Miriam had to admit he was enjoying the services. The preacher was talking about people being turned into salt or something, but that merely provided a counterpoint to the drama that was his Mom and Dad. The stares from the other patrons would have upset him, but he completely understood how much more interesting this was than some old city that burned down or whatever.

"Bill, give it to me now."

"Baby, please..."

"Now!" She jerked the Blackberry from his grasp, and raised her eyebrows in annoyance. "What's this? NetHack! Bill, honestly!"

The couple behind them snorted. Realizing they had an audience, Felicity turned back to the front, but didn't miss the opportunity to stamp down with her heel on Bill's foot as they stood for hymns.

Miriam had a smile on his face as he gave his contribution to the singing.

<=====>

"Oh, come on, Mom, you have to admit, that was pretty funny."

"It most certainly was not!"

"Mom, you even had the preacher cracking up."

"That's the last time I try to take you two into a church!"

Miriam and his dad shared a discreet high five as they followed Felicity out of the church.

<=====>

"Hi, this is Felicity Loksley. We're not home right now, but-"

Cary hung up on the machine again. *Where are they? She's always home on Sun- HE! HE HE HE!*

The day before had been absolute torture for Cary. For all he tried, he couldn't stop thinking of Miriam as a girl, and it had been a constant effort to keep from referring to him in the feminine.

"You'd think with how long we've been friends this wouldn't be a problem."

"What's that?"

*Crap.* "Nothing, Dad. Just thinking out loud."

Where could they be? He'd tried their phone three times already, with no luck on an answer. *It's about time Mr. Loksley got a cell phone for Miriam, it's not like they don't have the money.*

With nothing better to do, he grabbed his pack and headed out for a walk.

<=====>

It made Lindy feel terrible every time she thought about the difficulties Miriam was going through. If only she could do something to help him deal with things, but what?

"Hi, this is Felicity Loksley. We're not-"

She hung up before the message finished. *Well, if he's out with his parents, I hope nothing happens. Maybe they'll be home soon.*

She tapped her pencil against her school books, thinking. If worse came to worst, she could always- no, that can't happen...

Can it?

*Best to be prepared, I guess.* "Mom, I'm going shopping."

"Have fun."

<=====>

"What do you two say to steaks for dinner tonight? I can cook them on the grill, and it's getting warm enough we could eat out on the patio."

"Sure, Dad! That okay with you, Mom?"

"We'll have to stop by the grocery store on the way home to get a few things anyways, I guess we can pick steak up while we're there."

"Yay! Thanks! Good idea, Dad!"

"Heh, don't thank me yet. Wait until we're eating, otherwise you'll jinx it and instead of steaks we'll have charcoal."

"The grocery store's only about ten minutes away, so get thinking what sides you want to do, Bill, or do you want me to do those?"

"Why don't you and Miriam handle the sides?"

"Typical male, get you around a grill and the only things that matter are fire, meat, and beer."

"Nonsense. You know I prefer wine coolers."

"Oh, ha ha. Miriam, promise me you won't do this kind of thing to your wife when you're older."

Miriam giggled, "Alright, Mom, I promise. How about sweet potatoes and a salad?"

"Sounds good."

"Off to the store! The provider shall prepare a most gratifying meal for his charges."

"Oh, stuff it, Bill," Felicity snipped, but she was laughing as she said it.

<=====>

The trip for groceries was going well. Miriam had grabbed a good bag of sweet potatoes and some basic salad veggies while his parents had went to the butcher's booth at the back of the store to buy the steak cutlets, when he felt someone approach him from behind. "Um, hi."

"Huh?"

"Hey, uh, I'm Michael. And you are?" The someone turned out to be a slightly gawky teenage boy, who seemed to be around Miriam's age. He appeared to be rather agitated, but Miriam could not figure out why.

"Miriam."

"That's a pretty name."

"Thanks..." *Wait a second, did he just say pretty? Oh, God, he thinks I'm a girl!* Miriam blushed, and the boy seemed to look even more nervous as he tried to say something else.

"I've, uh, seen you around, and I w-was wondering if, um..."

"Miriam? There you are! Do you have the veggies?"

"Oh, uh, later!" The boy made his escape before Miriam had a chance to respond.

"Mom! You ready to go?"

"I guess. Who was that, one of your school friends?"

"Uh, no, he just, um... nothing."

She looked at him skeptically, but said nothing. "Come on, let's go. Your Dad's getting all twitchy waitin' to start the grill."

"Yeah, let's get out of here." *As soon as possible.* At the checkout, he rushed himself, and nearly forgot to grab his change until his Mom reminded him. "Sorry, Mom."

"It's okay, I'm just worried about you. You've seemed a bit out of it lately."

"I'm fine, Mom. I promise."

"Just be careful."

"I will."

"Good. Now, let's head out before Bill gets impatient and lights the car on fire or something, he's developed a nasty pyro streak and I don't want scorch marks on those seats."

<=====>

He wasn't sure how it happened, but somehow his aimless walking had led him to Miriam's house. Sure enough, there had been no one home. With no other ideas, Cary sat down on the porch steps to think some more.

Him and Miriam had always been close. After all, Miriam had been the first person to say hi to him when he moved in, and the only person who would play with the "new kid" for almost the entire first year. Once he'd started his class clown act, the other children had warmed to him, and began ignoring his second hand clothes and shaggy home-cut hair. Even when he'd gained acceptance, however, it had always been Miriam who he'd been closest with. They both had their own friends, and seemed to generally run in different circles, but no matter what they had always made sure to include each other in everything they had done. Miriam had tried out for baseball when Cary had wanted to, and when he was turned down, Cary had refused to play. Likewise, when Miriam had wanted to join Drama the previous year, he had brought Cary along. Though reluctant at first, Cary had been quickly identified by the teacher as having natural acting talent, and had played fairly important roles in the last few school productions, while Miriam had been asked to work behind the scenes on props and costumes due to "poor stage presence." It wasn't that Miriam was a bad actor- by all accounts, he was one of the better students in the class- he simply didn't have the masculine presence the teacher wanted for the male roles in the plays. In several cases, girls had been chosen above him to play the male roles because they were better suited, and Mrs. Reese didn't even dare to offer him a girl's part, knowing the teasing he would undergo from the jocks.

Maybe that would change now that he seemed to be starting puberty. *Good for him. So why can't I feel happy about Miriam becoming more manly?*

Now that he thought about it, Cary had really always treated Miriam more like a girl than a boy. He had always been Miriam's protector, even when he had been new. He'd watched out for her- HIM- like a big brother. People had called them gay, but he'd never felt that way. He knew he loved Miriam, but surely not like that?

*How would I feel if Miriam were to hang out with another guy, though?* This wasn't a question that he'd ever asked himself before, mostly because it had never arisen. Besides Cary, all of Miriam's close friends were girls. He might hang out with boys when he was around Cary, but now that he thought about it, Cary could not remember a single time that Miriam had tried to be "one of the guys" that he wasn't around. He decided to focus on the question at hand. *Surely I wouldn't care. I mean, he's a guy, they're guys, and I know we aren't gay for each other.* He thought about seeing Miriam with another boy, having fun and laughing, and unexpectedly, intense emotions of jealousy and possessiveness seemed to well within him. But he liked girls, didn't he? He tried thinking sexually of guys, and no matter who he tried, he just didn't find them exciting. He tried girls, and had to admit to himself that, yes, he most definitely like several things about girls very much.

So where did Miriam fit in?

The sound of the Loksley Blazer pulling into the drive brought him out of his reverie. *Dammit, too late now to leave without saying hi, at least. I can act like everything's normal if I try, but for how long?*

He desperately hoped it was for long enough as the doors opened, and the Loksley family came out to greet him.

Chapter 7: Dinner for Two

"Cary! What are you doing here?" Miriam was surprised to see Cary at his house. He'd seemed a bit uncomfortable the last two days since the hypnotism. *I wonder why I'm making him feel uncomfortable? Well, he did suggest it to the guy, so maybe he just feels guilty?* That seemed a likely reason. *I'll have to get him alone and talk to him about it. There's no time like the present.* "We're having steaks for dinner, wanna stay and eat with us?"

"That's a good idea! Why don't you? It'll give me someone to help with the grill while these two are preparing the salad and potatoes."

"Hey! I thought you said on the way back that you'd do the potatoes on the grill, too?"

"Well, honey, I'll be putting all my attention on the steaks, and-"

"Yeah, yeah. Enjoy your drinks while you can, sweetie, because this is the last time you'll have them for a while with the way you've acted today."

Bill stage whispered to Cary, "Sometimes it's hard to remember who the parents in this family are, isn't it? I stay in trouble while Miriam sides with the witch on everything."

"I heard that!"

Bill grabbed the steaks and ran for the back yard. "Quick, before she gets the attack hounds!"

Miriam scratched his chest and shook his head as he watched Cary head off after his Dad. The two were so similar in personality.

He caught the odd look his Mom gave him when he turned around after Cary was out of sight around the fence. "Come on, you can talk to him when dinner's ready. For now, we've got potatoes to bake and a salad to mix."

"Can we fry them, instead?" He remembered that Cary preferred fried potatoes, and thought if he was going to make him talk, he might as well enjoy the food.

"Sure. You grab the pan, I'll grab the salad bowls."

<=====>

A crash and cursing from outside caught Miriam's attention.

"Just your dad getting the grill out of the garage. Slice the pieces thinner, would you?"

He put his knife strokes closer together, making smaller disks of the potatoes. Shortly, another crash from outside, followed by more cursing made him look up from his work in worry.

"Just your dad digging out the grill cleaning kit. Back to work, those potatoes aren't gonna cook themselves!"

Miriam got back to slicing, and his Mom continued the conversation. "What's going on between you and Cary?"

"What do you mean?"

"He seemed kind of uncomfortable earlier, and he's usually very relaxed when he's around here. If something's wrong, please tell me. I know you've been having trouble with bullies... does it have anything to do with you and Cary?"

"What?" What she was hinting at finally dawned upon him, and he had to laugh. "Mom! We're not gay, though I do think he feels guilty for me being picked on. I'm gonna talk to him later tonight about it, that's why I wanted to have him over for dinner."

He noticed the sigh of relief from his mom, and they both giggled. "That's good. Not that I'd have a problem with you being gay, you know, but..."

"Yeah, Mom, I know."

A loud "Whoomph" sound from outside, accompanied by yet more crashes and cursing, pulled Felicity to the kitchen window. The worried look on her face quickly changed to a smirk as she turned around. "Looks like your Dad's lost his eyebrows again. Still have that theatrical facial hair we used last time?"

He paused before putting the potatoes on to fry. "Yeah, I figured we'd need it again. We really need to keep him away from lighter fluid from now on, though."

"Maybe, but where's the fun in that?"

<=====>

After the smell of burning hair had subsided, Cary moved forwards to see if he could help Mr. Loksley. When he offered his hand, however, all he received was a grunt. "I'm fine for now, it's later when I have to face Felicity that I'm gonna need your help."

With that, he began unpacking the steaks and setting them out to grill. "Fetch me a cooler, would you?" Cary went to the fridge in the garage and grabbed a bottle, and headed back out to the grill. "Thanks. Never could stand the taste of beer, but these things aren't half bad."

They stood in silence for a short time, Bill sipping his wine and watching the flames dance across the slabs of meat, before he began talking again. "You know, Felicity's been worried about Miriam the last few days. Seems something's going on at school that's causing him problems. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you, boy?" Bill had been calling him "boy" since the day they had met. Miriam had forgotten to introduce him, and for almost two months he had came around to play with neither of the Loksley adults knowing his name. Since then, the general name "boy" had stuck with him with Bill, while Felicity had eventually started using his name.

"Sir, I think it's just the jocks picking on him worse than usual. He's the smallest kid in our year, and I guess they see him as an easy target."

"I figured as much, but why have they gotten worse? If you know, boy, I'd like to be filled in. Keeps the wife from worrying so much when she knows what's going on."

*And you're worried, too.* "Sir, I'm not sure. You'd have to ask Miriam about that."

"It doesn't have anything to do with you, does it?"

*Ah, and the implications are clear.* "No, sir. We're not gay." He couldn't keep the blush from his face. "Miriam and I aren't dating, or anything like that. They're just stupid jocks."

Bill smiled. "Just checking. Now, how do you like your steak?"

<=====>

"You boys ready out there?"

Bill took the last steak off the grill just as Miriam and Felicity brought out the salads and potatoes. Everybody assembled at the picnic table to grab their plates, and while his parents were busy talking over their own food, he saw his chance to finally get a sit down with Cary.

"Hey, Cary. Why don't we go sit over there, under the trees?" The spot was far enough away from his parents that they wouldn't hear them if they talked quietly, but close enough that he didn't have to worry about them thinking they were doing anything. The accusation might be funny, but he didn't want to do anything that might add weight to their ideas.

"Um, okay."

As the two settled into comfortable spots around the roots of the old Cyprus tree that had made his great grandparents want this particular spot so much, he decided to bring things right out and say what he had to say. "I don't blame you, you know."

"What?" Cary seemed confused.

"For what's happened. I thought the reason you've been acting weird around me was because you felt responsible for what happened, you know, with the hypnotism? And I just wanted to tell you I don't blame you."

"Oh. Yeah, thanks." He gave Cary a smile, and after a nervous moment, Cary returned it. "I'll try not to act weird around you, but it may take a while. Sorry."

"That's okay, but you're my best friend, and I l-... I'd hate to lose your friendship." He caught himself just in time. *Just a second, was I about to tell Cary I loved him?*

Cary noticed the near slip of the tongue, and at first his face seemed to brighten, before falling again into the same strange expression he'd seemed to have whenever around Miriam the last few days. The two sat awkwardly, nervously avoiding each others gaze, as they thought through things.

*Did I really just try to tell Cary I love him? I mean, not that I don't, but... he's not gay, I know that. I don't know about myself, though, which is kinda scary. God, I hate this!* Did he love Cary in that way? He wasn't sure. *Regardless, I don't want to lose him.* He decided the best way to get things back to normal was just to talk. "So, do you think Lindy will actually tell Jonathan she likes him when he comes back?"

On familiar ground again, Cary returned partially to his old self. "I don't know. I don't understand how girls think."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, their minds seem to change all the time, and they always want to shop and things. They're like aliens or something."

"No w- they're not! I understand them better than the guys at school, with the sports talk and all the calling each other names and hitting each other all the time. That's supposed to be fun?"

"Hey, you girls call each other names and things, too! All the gossip going around, all that's spread by the girls!"

"Not us! Maybe the cheerleaders and the bratty rich kids, but we don't do that."

"I'm just sayin', 's all."

"What's all the arguing about over here? Honestly, you two are sounding like an old married couple or something."

Bill's interruption brought their heated discussion to a sudden halt. They looked up guiltily and apologized in unison, "Sorry."

"You two get to do the washing tonight, if you don't mind, boy."

"Of course not, sir. It's the least I can do to say thanks."

"And don't go juggling plates, either. I know you too well."

"Rats!" Cary's old joker streak popped up again. "There goes my practice!"

<=====>

"What time is it?"

Miriam looked up at the clock above the sink. "About seven."

"I guess I better get home after finishing these. You done your homework yet?"

"I finished it Friday night. No sense in letting it wait."

"Oh. I've still gotta do mine."

The pause in conversation was painful for both teenagers. Miriam handed Cary the last plate to dry, and pulled the stopper from the sink to let the water drain.

"Um, I guess I'll see you tomorrow morning at the corner?"

"Yeah, I'll be there. Sorry about the arguing earlier."

"No, it's my fault, I said some stupid things. Let's just forget about it, okay?"

"Alright." Miriam started forward, caught himself, and held out his hand to Cary, who took it and shook awkwardly.

"Later."

"Good night."

<=====>

Yet again, Miriam found himself lying in bed, thinking. *What ARE my feelings for Cary? I've always cared about him, and I do love him, but what kind of love is it? It's not that I don't find the girls at school pretty, I know that many of them are and I guess I'm a decent judge of appearance, but I'm not really attracted to any of them. The boys? I don't know what to think of them most of the time. I know I'm supposed to be into the same things, but I just can't see how all that is fun.* His mind ran back through the conversation from earlier in the day, and caught on something that had been bothering him. *God, did I really put myself with the girls when talking earlier? I didn't even think about it, but I guess I do fit in better with them. No, that's just those stupid memories talking.* He'd been having more and more flashes of memories from the past, seemingly random and unconnected. *They're coming faster now. What do I do?* His frustration welled up within him, and he couldn't hold the tears back. *And why am I crying all the time? I just can't seem to help it. I hope it doesn't happen at school, I've got enough to worry about there already.*

His train of thought was broken when his door opened, and his mom stepped into the room. "Sorry to wake you up, but I wanted to go ahead and grab the eyebrows for tomorrow. Oh, have you been crying?"

*Why now?* "I'm okay, Mom. Just thinking. Here, I'll get it out of my closet." He crawled out of bed and went to his closet to dig through his theater supplies, scratching his chest on the way.

"Honey, did you hurt yourself or something?"

"No, why?"

"I've noticed you scratching your chest an awful lot today."

"It's nothing, Mom. It just kind of itches. I think I may need to use some different fabric softener or something." He found the hair kit and glue, and handed it to her. "Here you go."

"Well, okay. Thanks." She kissed him on the cheek, and headed out the door. When she was gone, he climbed back in bed and tried to sleep.

<=====>

Cary tried to work out what exactly had happened, but couldn't keep things straight. The more he thought, the more confused he became. *Miriam almost said she- HE- loved me. That made me feel... good. Really good, in fact. And he seemed just as confused by the feelings as I did. She- HE- Oh, fuck it, if I can't stop thinking of Miriam as a girl, why fight it? She likes me, as more than a friend, and she knows it, but doesn't want to admit it any more than I want to admit how I feel. How DO I feel? Well, I guess I have to admit I'm attracted to Miriam as more than a friend, as well. I'm not gay, though. How does this work? And I saw Miriam scratching her chest a lot today, too. I've got a little bit of chest hair, but it didn't itch like that, and after seeing Bill I don't think Miriam would have a lot. Could it be something else? Of course not, that's stupid.* His mind focused on the image of Miriam with breasts, and he felt himself getting aroused. *They would suit her very well. And at least I'd feel better about liking her. But how would Miriam feel is she had boobs? She gets enough torment piled on her- we both do, actually- as it is. She's already pretty, even the other guys think she would be a good looking girl, if she had the body of one as well, would she make more friends or be worse off?*

One thing was for sure, whatever happened, Cary felt it was his responsibility to be Miriam's protector. *Me and Lindy are gonna have our work cut out for us, whatever happens. Where was she today, anyways? She usually gets in touch with Miriam every day, like a sister or something. Oh, well, guess I'll find out tomorrow.*

<=====>

"Mom! I'm home!" It had taken her several hours, and more money than she had really wanted to spend, but Lindy thought she had everything she needed now. *And if we need it, I'm sure I'll be happy I spent every penny I did.*

"Oh! Have a good shopping trip, sweetie?" Her Mom was perhaps a bit more vacant than was good for her, but at least Lindy knew she loved her. She was just happy she got her brains from her father's side of the family.

"Yeah, I did. G'night, Mom."

"Good night, baby. Sleep tight."

Chapter 8: Back to the Trenches

The grating tones of the alarm clock pulled Miriam out of another fitful period of sleep. Dreams of the past had kept him awake half the night, in confusion and terror. *At least the only time I see the bad ones are when I'm asleep. I'd hate to be awake through some of it, if it scares me that badly.* With more than a little reluctance, he scratched his chest again and began to drag himself from the bed.

After a quick shower and clean clothes, little different from those he had worn the days before, he set about working with his hair. *It really is getting rather long. Maybe I should take Mom's advice and get it cut.* He spent a few moments messing his the locks, before finally deciding to try a ponytail. After digging out a hair tie - his Mom would never hear of him using a rubber band - he pulled as much as he could back, and was annoyed to see that the front edges were just too short to tie back, resulting in a set of longish strands framing his face. *Oh well, at least it looks cute like this, though I really should put it higher up. It would be prettier with a bow, too.*

He barely missed slicing his hand on the edge of his dresser as he ripped the tie from his hair.

<=====>

*Where is she?* Cary couldn't keep his nerves in check, and bounced from foot to foot impatiently. Finally, he spotted Miriam coming out of his house, and jogged over to meet him.

"At last! I was beginning to think you were skipping school today."

Miriam looked at him nonplussed. "No, I just couldn't decide what to do with my hair."

"Well, it looks nice. You have very pretty hair." He realized what he said, and quickly tried to correct himself. "I mean, you know... for a boy."

"Yeah, thanks. Umm..." The two stood, blushing and shuffling their feet, for several uncomfortable seconds before Miriam began walking down the street towards the school. Cary smacked himself in the head as he followed.

"So, why didn't you wait at the corner like normal?"

"I did, at first, but after you weren't there at the usual time I came here to see what was up and make sure you were okay. I mean, you're my best friend."

"Oh. Okay. Sorry for being late."

"That's alright." Another uncomfortable silence followed, and Cary searched desperately for something to say to fill it. "Any luck finding a solution to the problem?"

"Problem?"

"Yeah, the memories thing? Found out how to stop them, or anything?"

"Not really. I've been watching myself carefully, and if I concentrate I can tell the difference between my own memories and the others, so I can at least mostly keep them from causing as many problems as they did the last few days. I've been getting a lot more of them, though, and it kind of scares me." He noticed Miriam shake, and fought the impulse to pull the smaller boy to him. *She's not a girl... she's not a girl... she's not a girl...* "What's that?"

"Huh?"

"You were mouthing something, but I couldn't hear it."

*Shit!* "Nothing. Sorry, just thinking."

Miriam's face twisted into a look of hurt. "Oh, I see! You think this is funny, don't you? 'Look at Miriam, the crybaby, weakling, coward!' If you're just going to laugh at me behind my back, then I don't need you!" He turned away fast enough that his hair whipped up, slapping Cary in the face before he stormed off down the street.

Cary was left dumbstruck. *What did I do?*

<=====>

Miriam fought hard to keep the tears out of his eyes. *How could he do that to me, making fun of my problems like that? I'd expect that from one of the jerks at school, but I thought he cared about me!* The effort was too much, and he barely managed to find a bench to sit before the sobs hit.

"Miriam, are you okay?" He hadn't noticed Lindy coming up, but her words made him even more upset. *Great, not only can I not keep from crying, but in front of people, too.*

"Go away!"

"Miriam, what's the matter?"

"I said go away! I don't wanna talk... just leave me alone..."

The movement of the bench told him she wasn't listening, and this was confirmed when she spoke to him again. "Hey, come on, it's me. I just wanna help." He felt her arm wrap around him, and fell against her, weeping into her shoulder shamelessly. "Now, what's got you so upset?"

"Cary, he... he... *sob*..."

"It's okay, what did he do?"

"I was telling him how... how I was scared... the memories... and he... he... *sniff*... was LAUGHING at me... and-"

"WHAT! Are you sure?" She gripped him by the arms and gently pulled him away from her shoulder.

"Well, he was mouthing something, and I asked what he said, and he'd been nervous the entire time we'd *sniff* been talking anyways, like he was trying to hold something in, and told me it was nothing, and..." Suddenly, Miriam felt very foolish. "If he wasn't laughing at me, why wouldn't he tell me what he was saying?"

Lindy smiled and hugged him. "Honey, I don't know. Regardless, I doubt you want him to see you this upset, do you?"

"Oh, God, no! What would he think? And I've got to apologize, too."

"No you don't. Here's a trick: let him think you're still mad at him. If he really likes you, he'll apologize, even if he knows he didn't do anything. Then you don't have to admit you were wrong, and he owes you, too."

Miriam giggled, and wiped his eyes. "You really think that'll work?"

"Sure it will! Bo- most boys besides you aren't that good at the emotional thing, and it's easy to manipulate them if you know just how to act."

"But isn't that a little cruel? I mean, he didn't actually do anything wrong, at least I don't think so."

"It isn't mean, it's survival! Sometimes it's good to admit when you're wrong, but sometimes," the corner of her mouth lifted slightly, "it's best to let them take the blame. They can't think as well as we do."

Miriam just laughed. "Yeah, guys are pretty dumb sometimes."

His face fell when he heard himself, but when he looked over at Lindy, she was nodding enthusiastically. "Come on, let's get to school. You don't wanna keep him waiting if you're gonna teach him a lesson, after all."

<=====>

Lindy tried to act upbeat for Miriam, but inside, her thoughts were anything but happy. *Hmm, guys don't usually get like this when they have problems. With the way Miriam was talking, you'd almost think she- he and Cary were dating. And did I just give him advice on handling boys? This isn't good.*

She spotted Cary just outside the main doors to the school, and glanced over at Miriam. With a haughty toss of his head, he headed past Cary and into the classroom, and Lindy couldn't help but giggle. *Well, he can certainly pull off the 'angry bitch' routine, that's for sure.* She gave Cary a questioning look, and he just shrugged his shoulders before filing into class himself.

<=====>

Miriam lowered himself into his seat carefully, grateful for once to be in his morning class. *At least Prince didn't put any clothes on my desk today. Shit! I forgot about him!*

As though reading Miriam's thoughts, Mr. Hendricks looked up from his paper at the head of class, smiling quietly. "Young Miriam, you'll be happy to know that Mr. Prince and his colleagues will not be joining us for the next week. Due to their actions, they have been suspended from school. If I were you, I'd take this opportunity to relax." Miriam wasn't the only one in the room to breathe a sigh of relief at the teacher's words. As the last bell rang out, Mr. Hendricks stood from his desk and approached his podium. "Welcome back to American History. Now, what can you tell me about the War of 1812?"

Miriam couldn't seem to concentrate on his classwork, and his thoughts began to drift towards that morning again. *What's going on with Cary?* He couldn't help but glance over at his friend, but turned away quickly when he saw the sad look on Cary's face. *Should I apologize? Or should I wait for him to do it?* Looking to his other side, he spotted Lindy, who smiled and gave him a thumbs up. Her sureness strengthened him in his resolve. *Cary can wait. At least a little while.*

"Locksley, stop daydreaming and pay attention!"

"Sorry, sir."

"Well, prove it by giving me the years of Madison's presidency."

<=====>

Math was a bore, and English was just as frustrating. Cary had wanted to say something to Miriam in each class, but had been countered by either angry teachers or Miriam simply refusing to talk to him. *What did I do wrong?* He couldn't figure it out. *Oh, well. I'll apologize anyways. I don't want to lose her.* Several times he had noticed Miriam looking at him in class, and the mixture of emotions on his face had confused Cary even more. One moment Miriam would seem to be angry, while the next he would almost be crying. But how could Cary apologize without even knowing what he had done?

"That's all for today, class. Off to lunch with you." The whole class cheered as they pushed and shoved their way out the door and towards the cafeteria. Hurrying along the halls in the throng, Cary set his nerves. *I'll apologize when we get to lunch. We always sit at the same table, so-*

"Cary!" Out of nowhere, a large blur seemed to appear, and as it struck him Cary couldn't help but laugh as he fell over.

"Jonathan, you nut! Feeling better?"

"Hell yes! Nothin' worse than not bein' able to breathe, or eat, or drink anything without getting sick, or-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Eating lunch with us today?"

Jonathan's normally exuberant mood faltered, and a look of disgust came over his face. "I can't. They're making me fill out some stupid paperwork in the office 'cause of how many days I missed. Man, I'm gonna have so much homework I won't be able to hang out for, like, a year or two. Just email me pictures of you three having fun so I can remember what it's like."

Cary laughed, glad to have his other best friend back around after the long absence. "Well, catch up with us after school. We'll all walk home together, I guess we missed you this morning."

"Right, later!" With that, Jonathan split off towards the offices, and stopping only for a moment, Cary nervously began the walk towards their lunch table, where Lindy and Miriam were already eating with the other girls and their boyfriends, deep in conversation.

<=====>

"What, you want to laugh at me more?"

"No! Please, just listen... I mean, I wasn't laughing at you this morning, I was just-"

"Just what, ashamed to be near me? Embarrassed that-"

"Miriam, give him a break! Now, Cary, what did you want to say?"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I did anything to hurt you, you know I'd never do that on purpose."

"Well, I- what?"

"He said he's sorry."

"Oh. Thanks, umm..."

"I think what she's trying to say around the knot of guilt is 'let's eat'."

"Good idea."

"Uh, yeah."

<=====>

"So, you and Cary friends again?"

"Yeah. God, I feel, like, so stupid and guilty. I mean, I know he wasn't trying to make fun of me, but I was just, like, so messed up already, and I saw him moving his lips, like he does when he's thinking something he doesn't wanna say..."

"Yeah, that's kinda annoying sometimes..."

"I guess I just got carried away."

"Well, at least things are good now." Lindy couldn't resist the urge to reach down and hug Miriam, and squeezed him tightly. *Yes! No more sulking about for you! I don't think I coulda taken another hour of that.* As Cary returned from the line with his lunch tray laden with the goop of the day, she squeezed Miriam's arm before scooting down so the two were side by side.

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Comments

I'm hooked!

Hi,

I really need to stop coming to this site, because I keep finding stories like this that make me forget there's a real world out there :)

That is to say, I really loved the story thus far. Can't wait for more! Thanks,
~ev

Echoes

You got s great story going, please continue it .

Realistic yet...

Cindy Lou's picture

Okay, you win. In spite of some weird grammar, I too am hooked. I found myself clapping for the funny and eventful things. Its fun to really get into a story the reflects part of my life. I do not feel the little episode with the denial of being gay worked though. Seemed like too easy to assume what the parent was thinking. As Miriam, the theatre buff, would say, "the motive is sketchy."

Thanks so much for your work - and play with this story. Looks like its publishable to me.