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Thank you to everyone who commented on my previous blog. I feel a bit more enlightened now, but there are some misunderstandings which I must clear up for all our sakes, and some more material for discussion. Here goes...
I am not a FtM myself.
I will point out the fact that I referred to myself as a "MegaTomboy" right at the end of the blog, and that I use this term in my signature every time I comment. I consider a MegaTomboy to be even more boyish than a regular Tomboy, but I still make a clear distinction between the former and a FtM. Tomboys/MegaTomboys are quite happy with being female. FtMs generally are not. Simples.
A transgender Tomboy/MegaTomboy is essentially a male who feels a strong need to be female in physiology, but is not usually very feminine by nature.
I also recall having addressed the ladies of the community whilst not including myself as a lady. Another potential source of confusion, but I simply don't consider myself to BE a "lady".
...In fact, I'm staring to get the feeling that I need to come up with yet another different title for myself. I have recently achieved a precise 50/50 with my gender identity, so even "MegaTomboy" isn't quite accurate anymore. This may open up a whole new can of worms, but I shall have to deal with that another day. I am digressing.
Was it not so obvious as to to which posts I was taking offense?
They're all still there. No deletions. The second one was a direct response the the first one, the first one appeared right under my own, though it was not a direct response to my own, and I may well have interpreted it wrongly anyway. Chances are I was making a fuss unduly.
What is the relationship between FtMs and communities (this one in particular) of gender dysphoric people?
Should there be more FtM related material on this site?
From my visits to the Gender Identity Clinic in London, I'm aware that there is a support group for FtMs, though I am not sure where it's based (if not in London) or how far reaching it is, or if there are other such groups elsewhere in the UK.
I've been part of this community for over two years, and I have yet to knowingly encounter a FtM here. Perhaps there aren't any in this community? Men and women are psychologically different in many ways. Perhaps FtMs simply aren't interested in and have no need of online TG storytelling communities? Admittedly, I have never actually looked for FtM versions of this community, online or off.
Since I'm 50/50 in terms of gender identity, I'd love to see more FtM material here to compliment the MtF stuff and level the field. Perhaps the lack of supply of such material is due to the lack of demand? Perhaps the demand is coming from me alone? If it really is just one person out of hundreds (if not thousands) who wants to see it, then it's no wonder that it doesn't get produced. That does not justify, however, the dismissal and indiscriminately sexist remarks that I may have gotten/seen when I have spoken up. This brings me to...
I do have a sense of humor, and here is a guide to not treading on the wrong toes in general.
If you feel the need to make sexist remarks in jest, I suggest making a very clear distinction between fine gentlemen, abusive macho sex fiends who really are nothing more than life support machines for their penises, and blokes who are somewhere in the middle of that particular spectrum.
The spectrum to which I refer, is the one that measures a man's genteelness. Also a woman's ladyness. As with any spectrum there are infinite possibilities, ...but you tend to get Ladies and Gentlemen at the top, Gals and Blokes around the middle, and the really sickening Bitches and Macho Pigs at the bottom. In the basement, You'll find the hellspawn in human form. The Feminazis, the Islamic extremists, etc, etc.
Bleh. Where was I? Ah yes... I hope this helps. Me personally, I have to look at both spectrums, and I find myself in the middle of both. A Gal/Bloke, if you will. No shame in not being a Lady/Gentleman, as long as I don't slip down toward Bitch/Macho Pig, or *Shudder* Feminazi/Islamic extremist. Man... Those expressions of gender duality, the latter in particular, would be, like, the ULTIMATE PARADOX...
...Or would the ultimate paradox be Feminazi/Gentleman or Lady/Islamic extremist? Argh! Better move on before my mind starts to wander... :D
Namedrop time.
K.T. Leone: I made a right scandal out of your song, did I not? It was just want the majority of the community would appreciate. I would have liked to have seen a FtM version on this site for the sake of leveling the field, but that may well be my desire alone. What would REALLY be pertinent to me, would be a dual gender version, although again there may not be much demand for it.
princesschelsea: I should have known that it would be most uncharacteristic of you to mock/dismiss me. I must have misinterpreted your comment.
Jenifer Brock: This whole scandal may simply be the result of you treading on my toes at a particularly bad moment. I may have overreacted a little. It has subsequently been brought to my attention that far worse remarks along the same lines have been made on this site. Ultimately, we should ALL be more careful when we joke, should we not?
Ragtime Rachel: Part of the third point on this blog is effectively a remake of your comment on my previous one. I found it to be very enlightening, especially since I have yet to actually knowingly meet a FtM in any stage of their treatment...
Finally, I will NOT be leaving this community.
As long as dual gendered persons and their ideals are welcome here, I have no reason to leave. Even if there's a Feminazi apocalypse in these parts, I will stay here in a fort as long as I have surviving friends here to share said fort with.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Phew! That was a blog and a half, eh? Thanks for reading, folks. So long (until you next see me blogging or commenting, or until you feel like messaging me), and thanks for all the prawns! ^_^
PS: I may well rebrand myself if I can come up with a good title that reflects my gender duality better better than "MegaTomboy" does, but don't hold your breath. If the Olympics committee gave medals for procrastination, I'd have several golds.
Comments
Re: Leveling the playing field.
While I concur that there is very little in the way of F-M stories here at Top Shelf, I believe it is mainly due to the simple fact that, Statistically, there are appreciably fewer F-M Transsexuals thus, fewer writers of stories about them.
Since the majority of writers here are M-F, THAT is what they write about, as in... "WRITE WHAT YOU KNOW." I speak only for myself with the next point.
Being M-F, I do not care to read a story that centers on a F-M transformation. I can't imagine someone wanting/needing what I gladly shed, a male appearance/identity.
I have nothing against F-M's and, as I stated in my response to your last blog, I have met several and found that they, just like M-F's cover the spectrum of "slightly male appearing and acting," to "almost stereotypically macho appearing and acting."
My simple philosophy goes as follows: Do what you want, do what you must, but HARM NO ONE! What another person chooses or needs to do to maintain life and sanity is not something I concern myself with... UNTIL... they harm someone else by doing it.
I hope I've answered at least part of your questions.
Huggles and Happy Holidays,
Catherine Linda Michel
As a T-woman, I do have a Y chromosome... it's just in cursive, pink script.
Oops
Shuda been a PM
Ole
We are each exactly as God made us. God does not make mistakes!
Gender rights are the new civil rights!
EH?!
Oh sweetie of course not. I'd never mock you, I genuinely also believe that FtM support is needed!
I know who I am, I am me, and I like me ^^
Transgender, Gamer, Little, Princess, Therian and proud :D
~.o
Have some prawns on me, charge lunch to my account. Luv ya Extravagance.
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
FtM vs MtF statistically
I am a reader / writer / pest / researcher (take your pick or mix and match).
One thing I learned in reading (not just here but in medical / psychiatric journels (research mind you)) is that there are far, far more MtF transisions than FtM. The frequency of such stories would, therefore, be expected to follow the crowd so to speak. It is an interesting premise that those out there who are FtM or thinking about their lives in such manner are insufficiently represented here would, I think, make for an opening in the creation of stories to fill that gap.
That is something I shall ponder for a bit - possibly to try and help to fill.
Meanwhile, take heart and do your 'damnedest' to write material to fill that emptyness. I'm certain there are those out there who would appreciate it. (not to mention it will give me a chance to think about and possibly attempt to produce something along that line myself) MtF or FtM? As for myself.... i'm not entirely certain. Maybe I'm neither yet both; or, perhaps, I'm from "somewhere else entirely".
Anesidora
I Have No Research, But
I've met about 8 F2Ms, one was post-op, one came once to our TS support group, I met the others around the Phoenix area, alone, hanging with Lesbians or with TS Lesbians. Other than the post-op, only 2 or 3 were on T (that I knew of).
I figure there are not many here because M2F fiction just doesn't do much for them. We might think growing breasts, for example, is great, but as teens they might have been sickened when it happened to them; the rest of our desired transformation also could be things they hate to think about. I just guess that if they like writing and reading fiction that speaks to them, they would be on a sight of their own somewhere else entirely!
Hugs and Bright Blessings,
Renee
MegaTomboy, I for one
am glad that you are staying. And Olympic Gold for procrastination? Would you EVER show up? :) LOL
May Your Light Forever Shine
I was impressed
With your last blog, and I'm SUPER impressed with this one, SuperMegaExtravaTomKitty!:)
You really have an eloquent and nuanced way of explaining your points. Previously I had only experienced you in short pithy (that's a compliment) remarks and comments on other's posts, usually with a purrpurrsnugglerubpurrhisspurr.
So.... you oughtta post a story, girl! As Sephy has said in the past, "Don't see it? Write it!" And it could be an FtM, or an antifeminazi, or a Tomboy Samurai story. But you are obviously gifted with the written word. I encourage you to do so!
BTW, as per the old "male bashing" premise, it seems men - especially father figures - have been the culture's favorite whipping boys for a while. Homer Simpson, Family Guy, any sitcom dad - they are almost always crude, cowardly, selfish, stupid, and to be laughed at. It's sad. Makes me say my name... **Sigh**
Sighs are the natural language of the heart.
-Thomas Shadwell
= )
I certainly won't deny having a way with words, but I tend to deal more in facts and logic and expressing affection and my own feelings. For many reasons, I lack the capacity to write fiction. I shall always be a non-author member, at least until further notice, although I do come up with some rather-wonderful-even-if-I-say-so-myself ideas and subsequently give them to certain authors. I have unleashed my creativity in this community by proxy. :)
So you've seen a new facet to me, have you? I have quite a few facets, just like a diamond... = )
I love diamonds. Hopefully someday my perfect woman/man will adorn my neck with them.
Mmm... ^_^
*Drifts off into dreamland*
I've met...
I've met/talked to quite a few F2M individuals in the past five years. They do exist!
One big difference is that MOST of they don't really get into reading much fiction (I can't think of one that would admit to reading trans gender fiction though a few read mainstream fiction). If that non-scientific sample represents anything close to reality I'm not surprised that there are few here.
That all said - there IS some fiction here that is F2M (I even wrote one or two short stories where it played a part, though I've since pulled at least one of them).
Good luck on your time and life.
Annette
FtM Fiction
I have to say that reading FtM fiction makes me uncomfortable. And I tried writing a little of it in one of my early stories (a novel on the MORFS site called We Can Work It Out in case you're interested) but it was very difficult. The main character in my story was born a gender dysphoric boy, changed into a girl (joy!) and then back into a boy (depression!). The story ended happily but the female to male transition really shook me up. I'm guessing that it would upset a lot of readers here. That might explain the dearth of FtM fiction.
That said, I don't mean to imply that FtM fiction doesn't belong here. I think diversity is a healthy thing and it might be a good idea to band together and support each other -- strength in numbers and all that. I'd even read a FtM story or two, depending on the genre. I'd like to be more comfortable with FtM fiction. It bothers me that I'm so touchy about it.
You might consider seeking out some FtM fiction writers elsewhere and encourage them to consider posting their stories here. You might just start something wonderful.
Happy prawns!
- Terry
Well first of all there is NO wrong type of TG fiction for BC
General speaking you can post non TG stories too if you've posted at least 1 as I remember it.
Bailey has a couple of stories that deal with things from an odd angle. Story with the boy who loses his bits, but gets the bottom surgery while remaining a boy. I asked Randalynn to write one about a woman who finds herself in man world and how will she manage and evolve. There are FTM stories out there, its just doing the research and find them. If they are on another site, maybe we can get it/them ported over here too?
As for a comment along the lines that all I guy needs is sex...I don't find it any more offensive than saying all women want to do is shop. [SHRUG]
If I come across some stories I'd be happy to post them on here.
OK, Ambien has kicked in and my typing ability is leaving rapidly...\\
{{Hugs||
XD
If you're thinking of the same story as I am, you may have missed a certain tag that Bailey used on chapter one...
Suggestion
If I may make a suggestion.
From what I read why don't you try if you feel up to it and write a story that you feel is appropriate.
It may inspire others who are FtM to try also.
I do remember a long time ago a site or two that was FtM but most of it was where when they became males they became the ever embodied jerk with their brain down in their pants and the head moved to the top.
I don't mind a good tomboy story.
Ibi