a question

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i sit here reading the stories on bc and i wonder do transgender people mind that none transgender people are reading about about them. i have a friend i play games with on a game site and shes proud of her self. so the sex none sex whatever of people doesnt bother me at all. yall excuse me but my my mind wanders in strange paths sometimes.

Comments

doesn't bother me

Non-members don't see blogs etc. If they sign in, I don't see that it hurts. Some may do it for laffs and giggles, but that's on them. Some may just be curious. And some stop by for a dose of community, belonging, or understanding, even if they never surface or post.

I don't think they mind.

I don't think the TG authors mind that non-TG (I understand they call us "cisgender" people) read the stories, blogs etc. as long as people are polite and respectful. I have been hanging around in TG stories sites for more than a decade, I never hid the fact that I'm cisgender and "straight," and I have never received a complaint. If anything, I can say that I'm probably more understanding of TG issues now than I was at the beginning. That probably counts as one very small step in the right direction, regarding general public acceptance of transgendered people.

Non-TG folk coming here? Eeek!

Right, Sir Lee. That's exactly how I see it. I don't have a problem with non-TG folks (I've never heard the term cisgender before, though) coming here, especially if they are curious and want to learn about us, or to understand a friend or relative or significant other, or just stumble in and find something they like here (reading the stories, nice atmosphere, great folks to talk to, whatever). Some are probably "admirers", too, which I don't have a problem with if they are well behaved; although I can understand why some girls are uncomfortable around them.

Many stories here can be and are enjoyed by non-TG people too. You don't have to be TG yourself to enjoy a story about someone who is, just as you don't have to be a secret agent, or private investigator, or alien bounty hunter, to enjoy reading about one.

Lisa Danielle
TG Alien Bounty Hunter

Personally I think it's nice

Personally I think it's nice fiction books on transgendered subjects are read by a diverse audience. I don't think not being transgendered should stop anyone reading anything, I see no harm in hetrosexual men and women reading lesbian or gay fiction, I think it's more important to just have an open mind and respect others differences.

I read nearly every type of fiction, i'm not into forced feminization but if a story on the subject catches my eye I'll read it.

As I'm bisexual I'll happily sit reading Gerri Hill or Radclyffe as much as I'll read hetrosexual romance novels.

Just enjoy the stories and respect others differences, just remember to be considerate when commenting.

Lizzie :)

Yule

Bailey's Angel
The Godmother :p

Very close to one :-)

Zoe Taylor's picture

I don't think my co-author will mind me outing her as non-TG in answering your question ;-) She and I are very close, and honestly, I find it really neat that she (and other non-TG people) read and write TG fiction.

For me at least, it's a sign that it's growing acceptance as a legitimately accepted genre with its own sub-genres.

A hundred years ago, for example, the only way you could write about two women in love with one another was if one of them was a vampire, forcing her way on the poor, innocent human, but today, it's much more mainstream.

I just hope it doesn't take a hundred years for TG fiction to get to that point ;-)

* * *

"...and then the day came when the
risk to remain tight in a bud was more
painful than the risk it took to blossom."

-- Anais Nin

~* Queen of Sweetness *~

~* Queen of Sweetness *~

Become a Patron for early access ♥

I expect it

Face it. Not everyone who reads BC is trans. There are some well known and respected authors here who are not trans. Some are trans-curious, maybe.

I would rather the 'straight' world hear our stories from us rather than filtered through Dr. Phil or The Sun.

So, yeah, the more the merrier!

Janet

Mistress of the Guild of Evil [Strawberry] Blonde Proofreaders
TracyHide.png

To be or not to be... ask Schrodinger's cat.

Janet

Mistress of the Guild of Evil [Strawberry] Blonde Proofreaders
TracyHide.png

To be or not to be... ask Schrodinger's cat.

If a reader likes the stories

i don't care if the reader is a three eyed alien from Centaurus. in my stories, though they are tg, i try to make sure the characters are human. i hope i succeed. i am going to try to move away from the sci fi soon and make a more real world tale. i hope you continue to read and enjoy the stories RJ. if you find the stories enjoyable, invite your like minded friends...
good to hear from you.
Hugs,
Diana

Make sure the characters are human...

Yes, I try to make sure my characters are human too. Unless they're not human, of course. Like that three eyed alien from Centaurus.

Oh, by human, you meant complex and realistic and emotional and noble and flawed and believable and sometimes contradictory, and not cardboard cutouts... Never mind, dear.

*hug and eskimo kiss*
Lisa Danielle

purr

Wow...
*hugs back and nuzzles*
Diana

Non TG?

Why would they?

I'm not TG and I've been posting stories and blogs here for nigh on five years (see here). No-one's been anything but respectful to me, which is why I keep coming back.

Surely if they were to get all hissy about non-TG folk coming and visiting their site, they would be effectively becoming an elitist group and further alienating themselves from the very society they are trying to gain acceptance in.

Jessica
I don't just look it, I'm totally nuts

I am only leery of the admirers

Consequently I do not post any pictures of myself nor do I give out personal info too much. I have only shared some very dated photo of myself all gussied up and one so closeup that one would not recognize me on the street really, to one BC author (she knows who she is.) So in my normal, plain Jane life ( no makeup usually ) of blue jeans, nobody would really recognize me anyway.

I am therefore leery of any PMs that I would consider to be from admirers also.

But yes, as long as there is respect, it is good for our community is known better by the cisgendered world.

As I've commented before, a community, a culture, a nation, and if we get there one day, a race, will always have somebodies tell their stories, and be known by them, for good or for bad. Since we seldom have bards or thespians give an honest account of who we are, those who are trans who want to write their stories can do so here.

An honest observer would say we are no worse and no better than any other group of human beings though I would like to believe we may be ever so slightly better. Why? Being who we are forces us to do a lot of deep self examination. It forces us to HAVE to know ourselves better and gives us an opportunity to be the BEST we can hope to be. We cannot survive otherwise as being TG/TS can put enormous strain on our psyches.

Kim

I only began realizing...

That I was TG myself AFTER I'd already joined the site, so I can kinda see things on both sides.

As a person who believed themselves non-tg and merely supportive, I felt absolutely nothing but respect from those who were further along than I. Some have begun informing me they suspected something all along and felt it better to keep their mouths shut until I came to it on my own - and I am grateful for that attitude, I may have dug myself in further had someone pushed me towards anything at all.

As someone who is now coming out of their cocoon, I think it's even more important that non-tg see my story than tg people. We already know how hard it can be to accept ourselves, we need to let the rest of the world see it as well. We aren't the way we are by choice, and for some of us, the realization is extremely painful to come to.

Abigail Drew.

Comparisons and contrasts...

Andrea Lena's picture

Hmmm.... some days I feel almost inauthentic and out of place; even 'non-tg' myself because of my 'non-operative' status. My own comparisons to some authors and readers who I know are post-operative. I must say that no author here has ever made that distinction; my feelings owing more to my own insecurities. And of course I am transgendered and authentic, which several of my sisters have taken great and tender pains to remind me. I do find myself noting that hardly anyone here makes any effort to identify themselves as non-transgendered other than to respond to blogs such as these. Most folks just write and comment regarding how they feel as INDIVIDUALS ...humans as it were for the most part...regarding how they feel about the stories they read and/or write.

I do feel uncomfortable, however, when a distinction is made on the very rare occasion by someone, feeling somewhat on display as if I was part of a zoology exhibit on transgendered women. You know? Making it plain that they aren't transgendered while making a point to call attention to our own transgendered status? The occasional patronizing comment that notes for the umpteenth time that I'm accepted, which instead of making me feel secure, instead makes me feel as If I'm being examined or made to feel somehow less than human? Am I the only one who's ever felt that way? I'm sure we might all feel that way in real life, but here? Perhaps one might chalk that up once again to my own idiosyncratic and all too frequent insecurities?


Dio vi benedica tutti
Con grande amore e di affetto
Andrea Lena

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

Andrea, rest assured that you are,

not only human, but a part of a really cool family here... we are all bordering on happily weird, but i have never felt such love and acceptance anywhere else. I'd like to think you are the cool sister that i look up to... can i adopt you?
Big Huge Hugs,
Diana

Or...

...I could have just said what Diana said, instead of my rambly rant below. Short and sweet or long and rambly. Some call me the former but often I feel like the latter.

Lisa "Maximum Verbosity" Danielle

i like both Lisas

rambly and to the point... both of her are wise
Hugs,
Diana

Dang, that Lisa chick talks too much...

Andrea, dude! You're messed up!

Sorry about the dude. I just read Charlie 7...

But did that make you feel better than if I'd said "Andrea, no, you're accepted and just like us!"?

Although you ARE accepted, and just like us (in your own unique way).

Shit, girl. I know I have a crapload of insecurities myself. That's one reason I use humor so much (well, *I* think it's humor, anyway)...

In general, TG people tend to have more insecurities. Can't help that. Probably stems from feeling like we don't fit into society... hell, we don't feel like we fit into our own bodies...

I didn't realize so many authors here were also non-TG. I knew of one or two before, including a favorite author of mine (I wonder who that could be)... I kinda like the fact it's not made an issue of. Let their work be judged on its merits, like all should be. When they do point it out, though, I don't feel like they're pointing a finger at my own TG feelings or anything.

If anything, I think they're probably more insecure about "outing" themselves as non-TG here in our playground, afraid we won't accept them, will resent them coming to our little haven... If we were the minority, maybe I'd feel more like they're saying "there there, we accept you. Here, I even wrote a story about you tg folks..." But they came to OUR place, and put themselves out there, for whatever reason, to put up a story... Now I hope I don't sound patronizing to THEM. *grin*

As for feeling like you're being examined, we're all being examined every time we post a story, blog, post, private message, whatever. That makes us (and our examiners) MORE human, not 'less than human'...

But I think one of the reasons this site has such a nice atmosphere is because of that mutual acceptance and tolerance. Even when we disagree, we can be respectful about it. Attack the argument, not the person. Usually. But I think, even when there are exceptions, most people keep that to themselves. I can only remember a few such exceptions, and the admins were quick to step in if it got too nasty.

Anyway, I get that you feel that way, Andrea.

I've seen the other side, though, to the tolerance here. I've seen TG folk lash out bitterly at non-TGs. I've seen backbiting within our community, like when post-ops attack early stage pre-ops, or TSs in general attack "just crossdressers" with contempt. I've seen homosexuals and lesbians attack bisexuals, with the "make up your mind, are you gay or straight?!" mentality. I've seen gays and bisexuals attack straights who didn't deserve it, just because they're straight. It doesn't even have to be LGBT related. I was once verbally flame-broiled by a whole BBS of angry wiccans and other neo-pagans just for identifying as a Christian (they didn't bother to find out what kind first, like that I was very pagan-friendly). It was so nasty, the other pagan BBSes in the network even voted to kick them off the network after that incident, which I felt terrible about being the catalyst of, although the pagan friends who invited me assured me it wasn't my fault.

I'm sorry you feel like you're being patronized, Andrea, and I hope you don't feel that way while reading my message... But I'll take that over the alternative above.

At least you seem to realize yourself that this is your own insecurities and perceptions at work, so I'm not really trying to convince you otherwise. You feel what you feel. (Okay, now I DO sound patronizing... sorry)

Anyway, now my own insecurities are making me feel like a babbling idiot. At least, I HOPE it's just my own perception of myself right now... :P

Peace, out. *makes TG gang sign*
Lisa the Homegirl
*gets out spraypaint can and tags wall with transgender symbol*