Authors note: This story is about a male athlete who realizes he is dysphoric over his penis and testicles and wants to get a vaginoplasty but stay a masculine man. One day an accident in practice makes that dream a reality. He and his teammate discover together that they have feelings for each other and navigate the complex situation together. It is a way to explore my own feelings towards gender and sex, but contains explicit gore and scenes not suitable for all audiences. Part 1.

—

Tom was a natural with his hands. His grandfather had owned an auto body shop when Tom was young and there were always projects around the house for him to work on. But he never really found his own until he joined the track team in high school. He worked out regularly, lifting weights at the local YMCA and running on the weekends with his teammates. When he graduated and joined the college football team, he was already in good shape and his performance only improved. The coaches wanted him to be captain of the team after his first year. Tom accepted the responsibility and made sure everyone did their part. In turn, the team supported him in everything from personal struggles to relationship troubles. By the end of his junior year, he had already qualified for nationals and was a strong contender to win it all. After a series of victories, his ranking as one of the top quarterbacks in the nation was cemented.

The same could not be said for Tom’s love life. While most of the guys on the team were actively dating women, Tom kept to himself, more or less. He had tried with girls, his last girlfriend Emily adored him, but Tom was never really that into her. He was glad when she finally cheated on him and he had an excuse to break up with her.

Part of the problem was that he had yet to find his true self. As far back as he could remember, he felt like something wasn’t right. From his earliest memories, whenever he was alone, Tom would tuck his dick away between his legs. He didn’t of course understand that it was something sexual in the beginning, it was just something that looked good. Later, whenever he masturbated, his thoughts went to how much he wished he had a vagina instead of his manhood, sometimes even imagining how his friends on the football team would feel inside him. He never really became comfortable with his fantasies though, and even though he indulged them now and then, he was afraid to actually try anything.

He came close to exploring things once while watching porn on his computer late one night. An image flashed across his screen showing two men fucking each other. He clicked off the video before they started getting serious, but there was no going back after seeing those bulging cocks.

When he next got horny, he jerked off, using the image in his mind as inspiration. Yeah it was hot, but he couldn’t really imagine another guy playing with his cock, the thought of resting his muscular legs on a man’s wide shoulders while getting fucked raw in the pussy sent shivers down his spine. Nobody would ever really understand him though, they would just think he had a weird kink or was trans, so it wasn’t worth it. Besides, Tom had no desire to be anyone else.

If anything, he loved being male and was too fixated on being masculine. Maybe that’s why he was dating girls. Tom spent more time at the gym then at home anyway and made good friends when he was there. If only they knew how he really felt about them.

One day at practice, as Tom suited up in uniform and ran through drills with his teammates, he couldn’t help thinking about all of this. That day he would make the biggest mistake of his life, one that would lead to him getting everything he ever (secretly) wanted.

Tom frequently jerked off to the idea of how his cameltoe would look in his tight compression gear, and would often tuck in practice, making him feel all warm and fuzzy. Luckily he was never especially endowed and always wore an athletic protector, so no one ever noticed. As usual, he wore the matching thong to keep his junk tucked safely between his legs while he stretched. This time however, Tom forgot his cup and jock at home. Darn, well nothing bad had ever happened before, right? He’d been wearing it for years and hadn’t gotten hit hard or had any sort of injury, plus the thought of truly being flat for practice really excited him. He didn’t know what could go wrong…

The previous night’s thunderstorm had turned the field into a slippery mess. Tom barely even felt his friend’s knee as it slammed into his crotch at full sprinting speed. He tried to stand, but the world was fading to black too quickly. All he could see was stars, swirling and dancing around in front of his eyes. His leg was throbbing horribly and he could feel the remnants of his balls pulling up against the inner wall of his thong, turned to mush by his teammate.

Tom woke as he was being loaded into the ambulance. At least three paramedics craned over him, in the back of the ambulance stood Luke, the his best friend, who also was the one who probably just neutered him. It took several tries to speak, every word excruciatingly painful. One of the paramedics must have noticed because he said “We need to get you out of those things.”

He looked down and saw the man cutting off his tight football gear. A flash of fear filled his heart. He was still wearing the thong, and now Luke was watching intently. He opened his mouth, but instead found himself moaning softly. What was happening?

His shorts now cut off and his thong exposed a sharp pain shot up his thigh and chest. The paramedics seemed confused, but quickly removed them too. The tape holding his dick back between his legs had come loose in all the trauma, and his dick was swollen to massive proportions. One pulled a small tube from a kit and shoved it up his now exposed peehole. “This might not be savable…” Tom heard as he passed out again from the pain.

“Wake up…” he was murmuring as he gently stroked Tom’s cheek. Tom’s eyelids were heavy and thick, he struggled to open them.

Luke gave him a sad smile. “I didn’t know what was appropriate coming from a teammate but I got you some fresh flowers.” He handed him a bouquet. “The doctors say that you’re gonna need another surgery today, I hope everything goes ok.” He placed the flowers on Tom’s chest and sat on the edge of the bed, next to his friend.

A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. A doctor came in with more medication. He asked how Tom was feeling, and for Luke to leave and give them some privacy to discuss what happens next. Luke left quietly, leaving Tom alone with the stranger.

Tom groaned as the doctor started poking at his urethra. As if to drive home the point, he pressed a plastic coated glove covered finger deep inside of him. “There was significant damage to your testicles, I’m afraid we had no choice but to remove them. You can choose whether or not you want implants after you heal enough so we can stitch together your scrotum.” He ran a gloved finger along the exposed part of Tom’s crotch. “I’m afraid there’s more bad news though. Your penis sustained quite a bit of damage too. Not enough to have to perform an emergency penectomy, but the erectile tissue was damaged irreparably and had to be removed too. It reduced the length significantly, and may leave you unable to orgasm. If you want, we could talk about reconstructive options when you’re fully recovered, but don’t count on it ever being functional again.”

Tom just stared blankly at the doctor, waiting for his mind to comprehend what he was saying. He tried to act sad when he asked the doctor “If I’m already at such risk for losing my sexuality can you just do a sex change and give me a vagina?” He knew he couldn’t possibly look any more pathetic than he did right now.

After a pause the doctor simply said “ The hospital would be liable if I operated on you without your consent and they couldn’t force you to sign paperwork stating that you were aware of the risks involved in your condition, though yes, that would’ve probably given you the best chances of function.” He stopped talking, probably waiting for Tom to respond, but all Tom could manage was to let out a muffled sob.

“If I had known your wishes at the time of the emergency surgery, I probably could’ve done something. As it is now though there’s nothing I can do. Sex reassignment surgery as a voluntary procedure needs counseling and an evaluation from a psychologist, unless we need to operate again, I’m afraid there’s nothing I can legally do, unfortunately.” Tom just sat there staring blankly at the ground as the doctor walked away.

When Luke was allowed back in Tom was crying into his pillow. Luke watched and said nothing, he was really sorry for what happened but didn’t know what else to say.

After a few minutes Tom lifted his head off his pillow. “I need you to do something for me, Luke.” Luke wasn’t expecting this request and said “Anything.”

“I’m gonna rip out my catheter as hard as I can, and I need you to run as fast as you can and get the doctor that was just in here, his name was Dr. Davis, I think. He told me I could have a sex change if I needed surgery again, or I could live with a fucking useless penis for the rest of my life. Do you understand what I’m telling you?”

Luke didn’t understand what he was saying, but Tom didn’t hesitate. He immediately grabbed the catheter and ripped it out, hard. It was only after it was out that Tom realized how loud he’d been screaming while doing so. He managed to get out “Alright, that’s done. Now hurry up and find him.” Just as Luke sprinted out of the room Tom felt a gush of warm liquid drip down his leg and the world faded to black.