I need your advice

Printer-friendly version

Author: 

Taxonomy upgrade extras: 

I would like to tap the collective experience of the community here.

I'm considering going on hormones.

Now, I'm 42, overweight, diabetic, high blood pressure, and I have a wife and daughter (both of whom are fine with this).

I am totally ignorant on this, so I would like to hear from you all.

EDITED TO ADD:

Yes, I plan on talking to several doctors before I start this, so I will be getting medical advice. Especially with my health as it is. The Diabetes was under control, but for some unknown reason, it has gone out of control. Everything else is under control with medication. Given that I AM going to talk to my therapist and an endocrinologist.

I think what I'm looking for, health issues aside, is "was it worth it to you", especially if you started on the treatment later in life.

Comments

hormones

hun, you need a doctor on board. there are side effects, including health risks. so please, get a medical opinion.

DogSig.png

Bottom line...as a Type II Diabetic myself, I am concerned

Andrea Lena's picture

...whatever you decide, get yourself a referral to an endocrinologist. The diabetes alone is enough to give pause, especially with high blood pressure. You don't mention...is your diabetes under control...medication and/or insulin? Medication for blood pressure? Being a diabetic and being overweight, you likely have high levels of cholesterol and triglycerides; you're already at risk for heart disease as well as potential issues with your kidneys and liver. You want to be around for your wife and daughter to enjoy you in your old age, regardless of any other consideration.
 
The issue of hormones can be addressed by the endocrinologist, I expect, but getting healthy is paramount. I'm sure anyone here who is already on hormones can give you specific advice on that issue, but with your self-description, I am certainly concerned about your overall health. Hope this helps.
 

She was born for all the wrong reasons but grew up for all the right ones.
Dio benedica la mia bella amici, Andrea

  

To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L'Engle
Love, Andrea Lena

same boat myself

I am in the same boat myself and have lost 11.5 pounds this past week but a long way to go. The best person is to ask for personal experiences I believe is Jill Micayla on this site. The endocrinologist is the one to talk to about this and you might be able to start testosterone blockers at least.

Hugs,
Jenna From FL
Moderator/Editor
TopShelf BigCloset

Hugs,
Jenna From FL
Moderator/Editor
TopShelf BigCloset
It is a long road ahead but I will finally become who I should be.

In my opinion...

bobbie-c's picture

First off - are you sure about this?

More than anything, you must not focus on the physical aspects of the thing, like is starting hormones bad when you have diabetes, etc. Rather, focus on the reasons why you are doing this: what do you want for yourself, what do you want to be. And then talk to a therapist-type person, AND THEN talk to an MD-type of doctor (probably an endocrinologist, as Aunt Andrea said). And then that's the time to talk about hormones, etc.

I guess what I'm saying is, the hormones are just the means of getting to where you really want to be. I guess what I'm getting at is that you need a life-plan first before talking about the mechanics.

Do you just want some feminine aspects to your physical form? Do you want to alter your emotions or outlook in life, or the biggie - do you want to be female? And wanting it is not the same as having it. You are a family man with responsibilities. Have you thought how this'll affect them? How important in your hierarchy of wants and needs are THEIR wants and needs? Are you willing to compromise yours for theirs? Or maybe you already talked it through with them and it's ok.

Big ideas, words and goals. Once that is already done, THEN think about the hormones.

Sorry for the lecture. Maybe you have already done this, and my lecture is unwarranted. If so, I deeply, deeply apologize, 'coz I went through that myself. It takes a bit of guts to pull back and think it through first when you want it so bad you want to cry. Looking at the chemical solution as the answer is tempting. When it gets so bad and you want it fixed now, now, now - it might make you want to risk it. I know.

But that is a mistake. Go into this with a plan that you have had checked/reviewed by the right kind of medical practitioner. Or do you want to risk problems with your pancreas, your liver, your kidneys, your joints, or your heart? Do you want a heart attack or a kidney failure?

When I started looking into it, my doctor said that if I had diabetes or a weight problem, it meant that I couldn't even consider hormone therapy. In which case, if you have these problems, in all likelihood, it means this is not an option. But my info is a bit old as I went through this a while ago, so I don't know if the state of the art in hormonal medicine, or the way they screen things, have changed. The long and short of it is: check with someone. (I myself didn't have those particular problems but quite the opposite. But I had to go through my own regimen of corrective physical therapy before I could start -exercise, muscle/weight gain, etc.)

I am so sorry, deeply sorry, as this lecture may be unwarranted. But I was there. I was on the edge, so desperate for a solution. My therapist checked me by parading in front of me case studies and pictures and stories of how it went wrong for some others.

bobbysig-blue.png
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/14775/roberta-j-cabot

additional stuff (and this is just my pov, ok?)

bobbie-c's picture

I only just read the bottom of your blogpost (got too wrapped up in answering the top part, sorry).

You asked: "Was it worth it to you?"

I'll preface my answer first. Hormones were a part of it, but not all of it. You asked if it was worth it? For me, the question is immaterial: I had no other option.

Your question is a very telling one, actually, as was your original question, that you were considering hormone therapy. It shows that you aren't 100% committed. If there is another way for you, please consider that. A lifestyle change, for example.

Hormone therapy is a big deal, especially if it's a serious program. It's not like you occasionally swiping your sister's BC pills, you know.

bobbysig-blue.png
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/14775/roberta-j-cabot

Lose weight first.

Yeah, you need an endocrinologist to evaluate you, and expect to get well aquainted with them. Have you had an Orchectomy? How does your wife think about that? What is your sex life like? If you have not had an Orchectomy then you will need to take Spiro too and I do not like that drug.

Diabetes

I have been on 'mones for more than a decade i have high blood pressure and type 2 diabetes. I've also developed arythmia and none of my doctors have ever voiced concerns about my hormones.

Some drs will use your desire for hormones as leverage to make you prove you are serious about getting them by getting the other health issues under control first.

Things are different in Canada and USA though... In US much higher doses are common in spite of the lack of evidence that more is better. And a T* blocker will reduce the need for higher / riskier dosages and be safer with you other health issues.

Nobody

There's more to health than your physical body.

When we are depressed or stressed, our bodies deteriorate. The whole 'mind over body' is more than just a mumbo-jumbo belief system that earns lots of $$$ for the writers of self help books. The placebo effect has been well researched and documented. The ill effects of stress have similarly been well documented.

Is it what you really want? If you see your body becoming what you want it to be, and take joy in that slow transformation, you will receive some positive health effects. Coupled with that, if the anticipated changes encourage you to exercise more and eat more healthily, you could see a net positive effect from the hormone regimen.

It is good that you ask others, "Was it worth it for you?" Still, you are likely to receive a variety of answers. Everyone is different.

Will it make you happy? Are the inevitable negatives (lack of acceptance by some) going to dull that happiness enough to take away your joy?

If it increases your happiness and contentment, it's probably worth it. If you take the additional step of taking good care of yourself, you can feel good about what you are doing for yourself.

Caution

Having been down that road and having worked in the TG community and stood by friends, I urge caution. That's all; caution. For me to offer you advise on what you should not do in your circumstanced based on the scanty information you provided would be, in my humble opinion, not only the height of folly but irresponsible.

This will be a very emotional time for all involved, impacting all your lives. I urge you to take this matter up with people who really know you as well as qualified mental health professionals, not strangers responding to a blog.

But above all, I urge caution. It is not only your life you are impacting. There are others you love who will be taking this journey, should you embark upon it, with you.

Nancy Cole

Nancy_Cole__Red_Background_.png


~ ~ ~

"You may be what you resolve to be."

T.J. Jackson

Was it worth it?

Though I totally agree about the cautions others have stated, I will answer that question. In 2005 I had stress effects on my body that were slowly killing me. High blood pressure (145/92 with meds)that was only slightly controlled, overweight (275 lbs), and puffing like a steam engine at any exertion. I started therapy, spent the first three sessions in tears, sharing for the first time ever my pain of being in the wrong body for 60 years (the first session was scheduled for 1 hour, after 2 1/2 the therapist finally decided I was not suicidal after all; she thought at first I needed hospitalization for my safety), and gradually started to feel better. Started hrt in early 2006 after losing to 215 lbs(the easiest wt. loss ever, it just melted away) and by three months after starting hrt, I had no blood pressure problems (after my meds were adjusted downward in increments due to Low Blood Pressure) and now it runs 128/61 with no meds. For me, the therapy was actually the life saver, but the hrt was what made me "feel more right", so I would say the two of them saved my lfe. Yeah, it changed that life in other ways that were knda negative in terms of family relations, but I think it has been worth the trip, and despite those negative things, I have less stress than ever before.

IF you are TS (that's first -- Just being TG is not enough to go the hrt route 'cause cross sex hormones can cause depression if they are not needed to correct mind/body mismatch), then HRT might help. Hrt is in no way a magic bullet. I think it depends on the degree of your gender angst, and your willingness to take care of your body as the bearer of your female soul, if you believe in that, by doing what you need to do (keep in mind that committing medical suicide by living in poor health is still suicide and suicide is not conducive to living, ya' know: ie. dead is dead no matter the route). If you do therapy and you and your therapist decide you are not TS, then find your comfort level as a TG and enjoy life. And DO NOT be afraid of being yourself. A lot of CaroL was already seeping through my male facade before I set foot in a therapists office.

CaroL

CaroL

Was it worth it?

Yes. That is the main thing. I did not have any problems with my health and I did dnot have any family around me, so some of your conditions were not applicable to me.
The treatment of possible transsexual persons is so well established here in Sweden, that it was about the same as to undertake any somewhat complicated project. The treatment followed the general rules set up by WPATH (earlier HBIGDA). It was as if I had hat a lot of tickets to use one-by-one in the right order. Due to different availible medicines the therapy will look a little different from country to country. But the general idea is to avoid that no more harm is done the the "applicant's" body than is necessary. This in the psychological examination as well as the medical treatment. All with the aim that if there should come a regret, the process' "no-return-point" should be delayed as far as possible. Damages are to the greatest part irreparable. And here I will talk about the MtF transition only:
Reduction of the effect of testosterone and stimulating the part of the body that will react to estrogenic substances. The medicines availible are as said different. But these are the general rules. With your medical background I would be really careful with any self-medication even if that might make the medicine treatment more expensive.
Once the medication starts it will take just an "immense" time before you see any results! But after just a couple of months the grewth of the breasts will be evident. I almost wore out my mirror, just looking for even the tiniest sign of something happening to my body. The first reeal sign will be an itching feeling where the breasts will develop. What a day of joy that was!
Then all started to run very fast with all that should happen with me and all those administrative things that need to happen.
Should you have any more specific questions, feel free to e-mail me direct
Good luch with your transition!
Ginnie

GinnieG

Hormones are what you need to do....

.... when you have run out of options.

While there are many ways of gender expression, the path of the transsexual is the hardest to take. It means many things, and health is only a small part of it. If there is any doubt in your heart and mind about it, then you should investigate alternatives.

I won't preach about therapists (useless) or doctors (useful if handled right).

Therapists are useless because once you have reached a point where the choice is between hormones and suicide, you don't need someone to confirm that for you. At that point, in my experience, all they do is hold you back.
I found myself a psychiatrist who was willing to accept that I had things all figured out and who, being a medical doctor, could also write my prescriptions. Why deal with two doctors where one suffices?

I have Diabetes II myself, and am holding my weight down (155 lbs at 5'8 1/2") by dieting. I'm on Metformin which I have taken to administering as needed. The Diabetes is under control in the manner that matters to me, namely that I feel good and am at the energy levels I'm used to from before the Diabetes was diagnosed.

I'm also on HRT, being nearly 8 years post-op. Diabetes and HRT have never influenced each other, at least for me. I inject estradiol valerate 10mg/ml once every 2 weeks. Sometimes I forget the injection and am rewarded with hot flashes. To some, that may sound like a low dosage, but I feel good with it. I tried higher ones without any improvement, so why bother?

Diabetes doesn't block HRT at all, if Diabetes and estrogen were incompatible, all woman diabetics would die. Doctors are very CYA about most anything and one needs to learn to see past the bullshit.

If you need to take that path, you will find that you can.

Melanie