As the dawn chorus broke and with a heavy heart, I wrote my goodbye letter to Liam.
Dear Liam,
I am so sorry to say goodbye like this but I can no longer fulfill the role you want me to do at the expense of all my desires. To carry on like I have for the past few will totally destroy me. If I don’t leave now, I never will. I’ve returned all the gifts you have bought me since I came to live with you. I have managed to gather enough money to get me to wherever, find a place to live and start a new life.
Please don’t come searching for me. I will change both my name and appearance. The past has been fun at times but I have so many dreams of my own that I need to try to achieve and if I fail, then so be it.
Jess
I looked at the text. To sum up the past years of my life in so few words seemed to be… wrong but it had to be done. Even though I was living with a wealthy jet setting businessman, I had no friends. I had no one I could call a friend. My role had been to appear with my boss and pretend to be his wife. I lived a life of luxury but in virtual isolation. I could not take it any longer. To be blunt, I was lonely and needed friends around me. Real friends not faux plastic ones who were only interested in looking good.
With renewed vigour, I folded the single page into three and inserted it into an envelope. Even those simple, everyday items bore the emblem of Palmer Industries. I’d grown to almost despise it in the past few months. It was as if I was becoming just another cog in that conglomerate.
I left the envelope on the hall table and quietly disabled the alarm system and slipped out the side door of Fanum House, all 20 bedrooms and god knows how many baths and receptions the Faux Georgian monstrosity contained.
The side door led to the adjacent churchyard. On the other side, I fervently hoped, my taxi was waiting to get me out of this godforsaken hole once and for all.
I breathed a huge sigh of relief as I spotted the mini-cab waiting exactly where I’d asked it too.
Without looking at the driver, I got in the back. I was carrying a small bag with a few changes of knickers and some makeup plus a pair of heels and a skirt or two.
“Kidderminster Station please,” I commanded.
The driver turned around and smiled at me.
I let out a gasp.
The driver was Liam’s ‘factotum’, Parker.
“Don’t worry Miss, I just want to make sure you get away safely”, came his calming words.
“How…. How did you know?”
“I've had my suspicions for a few weeks. Don’t worry, the Master does no know. I sensed your frustration and, well it seemed that you switched onto autopilot when you attended functions with the Master. That was not like you. You were the one who made us all laugh and smile when you first came into our lives. That has been missing for the last few months.”
I sank back into the seat as I let out a huge sigh.
“You’d better get going then, if I’m going to get the first train to New Street.”
“No need to worry Miss, I’ll take you to New Street myself.”
“What about Mr. Liam? He’ll go berserk when he finds my letter. The first person he’ll call out for is you.”
“Don’t worry,” said Parker as he put the taxi into gear and began to move off.
“Today is my day off. I told him that I’m going to Chester Races to meet up with some old pals.”
“How… How did you know that I was going to leave today?”
“I didn’t. I just took pot-luck and made sure all the local mini-cab companies had a little incentive to let me know when you made your booking.”
He looked at me via the ‘rear-view’ mirror and smiled.
“It seems that I was lucky."
I sat back as the Worcestershire countryside passed us by. Soon we were entering Birmingham. I never really liked the place and hopefully, this would be my last time there in this life.
"What will he say when he reads my letter?" I asked as we hit the M5.
"He will be angry but he'll get over it and find someone else to play your role."
"Are you sure about that? He's invested a lot in me. God knows how much he spent on surgery for me."
"He can afford it so just relax and think about the pretty good life you have had and the even wonderful one you have ahead of you. He was good to you and you were there to do a job for him. A job that you did perfectly, I might add."
“Thanks Parker.”
He smiled back at me via the rear view mirror.
Parker was true to his word and dropped me off outside the new ‘New St’ station which for some reason bore the name ‘Grand Central’.
“This is for you. Don’t open it until you get on your train to wherever,” he said as he handed me an envelope. At the same time, he tapped the side of his nose a few times. I knew that I should just accept the envelope without question.
“Thanks Parker. You are an angel.”
He laughed and said, “I might be now but before Mr. Liam I was just another corporate lawyer. I was in a dark place because my wife and child had been killed when they went home to Brazil. I was in danger of self-destructing but Mr. Liam offered me a job and has allowed me to recover and become a functioning human being again.”
“Don’t you want to go back to your old job?”
“What? Are you crazy? Working 100 hours a week just to climb the greasy pole? That was what drove my wife away in the first place.”
I knew Liam’s penchant for giving people a second chance. It was his way of giving something back to society when he continually took pretty well everything he could lay his hands on and mostly without sign of regret.
I stuffed the envelope into my bag and almost ran into the station. If I’d delayed my exit any longer I would have burst into tears and that just wouldn’t do.
Once inside the station, I was suddenly faced with a decision. Where should I go? My original plan was to get the first train into Moor St and then after walking the short distance to New St Station, I would take the second long-distance train, no matter where it went.
I looked up at the departure board. My heart sank when I saw that the first three long distance trains were for London Euston. London was not a place I wanted to go. Liam had far too many contacts there for me to remain invisible for any length of time.
I scanned down the board feeling slightly panicky. I felt relieved when I saw a train for Glasgow that departed in twenty minutes. That would do for my first destination.
I quickly purchased a first class single, ‘no I wasn’t coming back and no, I didn’t have a rail card’, to Glasgow Central. I decided to travel in style while I could. My funds wouldn’t last very long so while I could, I would and make the most of it.
The feeling of relief I felt when the Pendolino pulled away from the platform was immense. There had been no sign of Liam or any of his hired help trying to drag me off the train.
As the train sped north, I remembered the envelope that Parker had given me as I got out of the Taxi. I dug into my bag for it just as the complimentary coffee arrived. That diverted my attention for a while. Coffee was just what the doctor ordered at that time of day.
The arrival of a hot bacon sandwich proved to be too tempting. Liam would never let me eat anything with more than a trace of fat on it. While I was with him, I’d lost quite a bit of weight. Not all of it in good places. My first bacon sarni with brown sauce in many years was just pure delight. My taste buds went into overdrive and I almost ordered another one when I felt the train slowing down.
The train stopped at Crewe for what seemed an eternity. I almost chickened out and legged it from the train several times before it started moving once more and I breathed another sigh of relief. I vowed there and then to get off at the second stop wherever that may be.
The second stop turned out to be Preston. This was all strange territory to me. I went into the refreshment shop and the person serving said ‘Are you all right?’. For an instant, I wondered if they meant, am ‘I’ all right. Then I realized that it was a general greeting and not specifically aimed at me.
I purchased another coffee and sat down to plan my next move. Where should I go next?
I looked at the destinations of trains that would depart in the next couple of hours. One name stood out. ‘Nelson’. I knew of Admiral Nelson but I’d never realized that there was somewhere with the same name. That sealed it, I’d go there.
I left the platform and explained to the ticket inspector that I was breaking my journey for a few hours. He let me through the barrier and watched as I exited the station.
I waited a few minutes before returning and heading for the ticket window.
“Single to Nelson please,” I asked.
I handed over a twenty-pound note hoping that it was enough. It was. I grabbed the change and quickly headed for the platform and my train to Nelson.
This train was a big let down after the almost opulent Pendolino first class. This one was more like a bus on rails.
After a few minutes, I relaxed and realized that this is how I would travel for the foreseeable future. Still, I got a bit of a kick about laying all sorts of false trails for anyone who would try to follow me. Would anyone trying to follow me expect to see me on a train like this especially after the private jets and limo’s that I’d been used to for the past few years?
Once we’d left Preston, I opened the envelope that Parker had given me at New St Station.
“Jess,
The enclosed money is just a little something that you can use to get you started in your new life. Don’t worry about where it comes from and if Liam can trace it. He can’t and it is from his ‘special situations fund’. I don’t need to tell you what that is for. Enjoy it and your new life. You deserve better than Liam.
Parker“
I looked at the cheque with an open mouth. It was for a half of a million pounds. Despite my time with Liam, I’d never seen let alone held anything of such value. For a moment or two, my future looked a lot rosier. Then I had second and even third thoughts. Should I just tear it up and forget it ever existed or … should I keep it and use it to get myself setup in whatever it was that I was going to do with my life? Such a quandary? What should I do?
Any decision was going to have to wait because the train had arrived in Nelson. As I stepped down from the carriage, I knew that this was not the place for me. The whole atmosphere fitted my idea of a Northern Industrial Town down to a ‘T’. I wandered out of the station without a clear plan as to what to do next.
There was a bus waiting to depart from the Station forecourt. The destination blind said ‘Skipton’. That sounded a bit more romantic than Nelson so I got on board and purchased by ticket. Skipton sounded perfect for someone who had ‘skipped’ away from their old life.
I found a seat towards the back and sat back waiting for the bus to depart. Slowly it filled up and nearly half an hour later, it set off. As we travelled up and out of the valley, we made fairly frequent stops and most passengers got off. As we descended towards Skipton, we picked up more passengers heading to Skipton. Then I realized that we’d left Lancashire and entered North Yorkshire. A different county and hopefully one that I’d feel more at home in.
The town of Skipton felt totally different to Nelson. The stone buildings whilst grey in colour made feel more at home. My original home was in the Cotswolds, another area famous for its stone buildings.
I wandered through the town and looked at the displays of properties for sale in the various Estate Agents. I could see a good proportion of the money that Parker had given me disappearing just to get a small place. I sighed and carried on.
My rumbling stomach signalled that it was time to eat. I found a pub that seemed to serve half decent food and sat down to plan my next move. That was fairly obvious. Find somewhere to stay the night and see what the morrow brings.
The first place I tried wanted a credit card ‘to guarantee any charges’ so I left feeling deflated. In the end, I was directed to a place on the edge of town that was a chain of no frills motels. They accepted my cash as payment for two-nights room only. My room was simple and clean but frankly basic. It would have to do. It was actually perfect for keeping under the radar.
The next morning, I walked back into town and went into a bank. Opening an account with a cheque for half a million and no fixed abode proved rather difficult. I tried explaining that I needed an account so that I could buy a residence. Talk about catch-22 and immovable objects. I tried a building society. They were a little more welcoming. Yes, I could open an account but I couldn’t touch the money for five working days. My stash of cash would hardly be enough if I were going to do anything but sleep in the motel and have one good meal a day. Now I really regretted the extravagance of my first class rail ticket. I could have done with the money for essentials such as a mobile phone and another change of clothing.
In the end, I signed up for the account on offer from the Building Society. Thankfully, I had my passport to use as a form of Identity. Seeing it made me realise I would have to change my name as soon as I got some funds behind me. They accepted that I would not give my previous address when I explained that my partner was a violent person. The banking rules apparently had a little discretion in this area. I wondered if I gave them my former name and sex if they’d be so accommodating. Society was willing to accept ‘battered wives’ but apparently ‘battered husbands’ didn’t exist or ‘they deserved it’. For once, I was glad that I appeared to be a woman when underneath, I was still a fully functioning male of the species.
With money in the bank and a place to kip for a couple of nights, I renewed my search for a place to live. It didn’t take me long to realize that in the short term, I would be better off renting a place.
That still presented problems as most agencies and landlords needed a hefty deposit as well as references that they could check. Just saying that I’d been out of the country didn’t work with the first three places I tried.
In the fourth, I tried a new tack. This Estate Agency was right across the road from the building society where I was opening an account.
“I have a large sum being deposited at the building society over the road. I am sure that the manager will happily verify that this is true.”
“Would that be James Blake by any chance?” asked the letting agent.
“I’m not sure. Let me see. He gave me his card when I was in there just now,” I replied digging into my handbag.
I produced the card and handed it to the agent. The name on the card was indeed that of James Blake.
The agent smiled as he picked up the phone.
“Hi Jimmy, How’s tricks?”
“Same here. Look, I have a young lady with your card sitting in front of me. She says that she has a sum on money being put of deposit with you. Is this true?”
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
“She does?”
“Ok thanks,” he said and put the phone down.
The agent smiled.
“James is my brother-in-law. He confirms that a large sum is being cleared into your account.”
I smiled and said,
“To satisfy your curiosity, the amount could buy pretty well any of the properties you have available for rent that you are showing in the window.”
“Why don’t you buy somewhere?”
“I’m not sure how long I’ll be staying here. I need to find a job and get settled. If that does not work out, then I’ll move on and try somewhere else.”
“Ok, I think I understand your requirements. Let me show you some short term rental properties.”
“There is one other problem, I don’t have any furniture.”
I was shown the door within a couple of minutes, as all their properties were unfurnished.
By the end of the day, I’d pretty well exhausted all the agencies in the town. I was feeling rather depressed in the last one when one of the office staff piped up,
“Have you thought about a ‘live-in’ position?”
You could have knocked me for six at that suggestion.
“N… no, I’ve not considered that option.”
The woman who’d asked the question stood up and came over to the desk where I was sitting. Her male colleague looked less than pleased at the thought of losing a sale.
“Don’t look all sulky Dave. Can’t you see that the young lass is getting nowhere with renting. I’m also betting that she’s been to all the other agents in town and got nowhere either?”
I returned her a half smile and a nod of the head.
“I happen to know of someone who is looking for a live-in housekeeper.”
She looked at me earnestly before saying,
“I hope you wouldn’t mind working to a vicar?”
You could have knocked me for six for the second time in less than a minute when I heard that suggestion. I’ve never been very religious and I couldn’t remember the last time I went to church for something other than a wedding or a funeral.
“I… I’ve never given it any thought. I guess that as long as he does not bite, I’ll be fine.”
The woman grinned.
“It’s not a ‘he’ but a ‘she’. She’s my sister.”
Inwardly, I groaned. I was sure that she’d see through me in an instant. Still, beggars couldn’t be choosers and all that.
Putting my best face and foot forward, I replied.
“In that case, I’d like to meet her.”
Good replied the woman.
She stuck out a hand in front of me.
“I’m Grace by the way. Sis is called Mary, the Reverend Mary Hammond, vicar to this parish.”
I shook her hand,
“Jess. Jessica Parish. Pleased to meet you.”
She giggled at the similarity of my surname to the vicar’s domain.
I met with Mary at a local Café where over afternoon tea, we discussed the job and my role in her life.
Within five minutes, I’d decided to take the job but the new me was not going to keep secrets after all, my new boss was a Vicar.
“Mary, there is something that I need to tell you but not here.”
Mary looked surprised but didn’t complain. I guess being told bad news is part of the job description for someone in her position.
“Let us take a walk along the river. Then you can tell me what is troubling you. Being able to listen to people’s problems is all part of my job.”
Five minutes later we were strolling along the river bank.
Mary didn’t press me to speak.
“Mary, I’m not who I seem.”
“I have found that we seldom are.”
“I’m a man underneath all this,” I jesturing at myself. I was wearing a dress and matching coat and black heels.
Mary stopped dead in her tracks.
I felt as if my heart had stopped dead.
All she said was,
“So? Does it matter? I don’t think it does.”
She studied me for a few seconds.
“A relationship gone wrong? Someone might come looking for you? Yes or no?”
She put up her hand to stop me answering.
“My guess is yes to both. Then being housekeeper to a vicar is very much under the radar and perfect for you.”
“But…”
“Jess, it does not matter to me. The Church has a long history of giving sanctuary to people in need. You are in need. I can provide a refuge for you until such time you are ready to move on. How about it then?”
“Yes, yes thank you very much.”
“Well come on then, the Vicarage is this way,” said a very happy Vicar.
As we crossed a small bridge I could see the Church ahead of us.
“Where are you staying at the moment?”
“At the motel on the edge of town.”
“Well let me show you your room if you like it we can get your belongings from there this very afternoon.”
Then she turned to me smiling and said,
“Then after dinner you can teach me how to do eyeliner just like yours. I have never mastered it.”
I felt a sudden lift in my heart. It was no longer so heavy. I could see a bit of light at the end of the tunnel that might not be an oncoming train.
[To be continued in part 2 of 3]
Mary took me under her wing and eased me into Parish Life once she had helped me create a believable back story for my life. We needed a story that had to stand up under the close scrutiny of her parishioners. It didn’t take me long to realise that Mary was an expert at that. I sat back and marvelled at how she tied things together so that were no loose ends.
Then there was the subject of my clothes. Mary took one look at the few I had in my case and laughed her head off.
“Those will never do for the parish ladies,” she commented.
Then holding one of my ‘thongs’ she said,
‘These are far too flirty and fancy for us plain country folk. We will have to sort out your wardrobe before the Ladies Circle on Thursday.”
I must have looked crestfallen but I knew that she was right. A new life meant a new image from top to bottom, inside to out.
“Don’t worry, my diary is free tomorrow. We can go into Leeds and get you nicely sorted out. It will be fun besides, I hate shopping alone.”
Mary skipped out of my room saying,
“Just make sure that you have plenty of cash. Am I right in thinking that you don’t want to leave a credit-card trail?”
“That might be a problem. The Building Society won’t let me access my money yet.”
Mary just grinned back at me.
“Don’t worry, I’ll sub you until next week. I’ll expect a nice donation to Church Funds in return for the loan but I won’t charge ‘Wonga’ rates.”
I didn’t know what to make of her. If I didn’t know better, I would have felt that I was being manipulated by her.
As I relaxed in her company, I decided that it didn’t matter one little bit.
It was nice to be in the company of another woman. After my years as Liam’s Trophy wife where contact with other women on anything other than a very superficial level was pretty limited I started to feel at home in the vicarage.
Our trip to Leeds turned out to be more than just shopping. I returned with a new hair colour and style. It made me look a lot older and would take a bit of getting used to. Before, I had shoulder length blonde hair like most of my fellow trophy wives. My natural colour had been once upon a time, a light brown. Now I was a deep brunette and a good two to three inches shorter.
With my new hair combined with a change in my style of makeup and of clothes that made me look at least five years older than I really was. Mary was adamant that I should wear skirts at all times. She was also insistent that they were also knee length or longer and not tight pencil styles. My shoes also got a thorough overhaul. Years of tottering around on high heels playing the ‘trophy wife’ had taken its toll on my feet.
As we had a late lunch in a City Centre Café Mary said,
“Here we like our housekeepers to wear skirts and flat shoes.”
“I’d noticed that, but I am drawing the line with my eyelashes. I have sod all real ones so I will wear false ones every day.”
Mary grinned.
“Good. Then you can teach me how to wear them as well. I really can’t be outshone by the housekeeper now can I?”
“But… You are a Vicar?”
“Yes I am but I am also a woman in case you have not noticed. A little femininity when wearing my ‘dog collar’ would be nice. Besides, most of the congregation won’t notice and those that do will be a bit jealous. No extravagant ones though.”
“What do you mean extravagant ones?” I asked puzzled.
“Oh, those multi-coloured with a huge sweep. Or those with diamante along the band.”
I grinned back knowing the sort that she meant. I had a pair in my makeup bag but the diamante was actually real diamonds.
“Yes Boss.”
The following day was the bi-monthly meeting of the Women’s Circle.
I was very nervous as I was presented to the twenty or so women who gathered in the Vicarage every two weeks. My job was to serve tea and cakes to the attendees. I’d made Mary laugh by wearing an apron over my skirt.
“We could get you a proper Maids uniform if you want?” she commented in a very off hand sort of way.
I glared back at her but the idea stuck in my mind.
I was grilled by several of the ladies as I served them tea. Thanks to Mary, my backstory held up pretty well. After an hour or so, I relaxed and they relaxed too. I began to feel that I’d been accepted at least provisionally.
As I showed the last of the women out, I suddenly felt tired and my feet ached. I’d been on my feet for three hours. The new shoes I was wearing didn’t help.
“Come on into the Kitchen and I’ll make up something a little stronger than tea,” suggested Mary.
I looked at her strangely.
She smiled.
“Look, being a member of the Clergy does not mean that I’m tea-total and most certainly not celibate but don’t go telling my parishioners about that otherwise I’ll have to start quoting the Bible at them and at the moment, I can’t be bothered to even begin to try to remember the chapter and verses where wine is mentioned in a positive way.”
I smiled.
“You mean the feeding of the five thousand?”
“Yes but there are better references. Perhaps I should use that as a theme for a future sermon? But in the meantime, we are off duty and I need a drink. There is only so much women and parish gossip I can take for one day.”
“Sure thing Boss.”
“You did great today. You seemed to fit right in.”
“Thanks but I think Mrs Featherstone has some doubts about me.”
“She took two years to accept me. She’s a tough cookie. Get her on your side and you are home and dry.”
Over a glass of wine, Mary said,
“I really meant it when I said that you did very well today. That is your big test over with.”
“Really? I thought that would be on Sunday. At the Services?”
Mary sighed.
“How many times do I have to tell you that you don’t have to come to Services. You are my housekeeper, not the Verger.”
“Yeah and try telling that to at least half of the ladies who were here today. They are expecting to see me there on Sunday. They all said so at they left.”
“Their bark is worse than their bite.”
“That’s as maybe Mary, I will be there this Sunday and every Sunday and Wednesday until I leave. Ok?”
“Ok. I get it,” she replied admitting defeat.
Life settled down into something approaching a routine. I managed the Vicarage and did most of the cooking. I gave many thanks to my insistence that I learn how to cook even though Liam had a live-in cook. Mary appreciated the change in her diet. I’d learnt from a retired former two Michelin Star Chef. The chance to do something apart from look pretty all the time was really great.
Mary’s work meant that she could be called upon at any hour of the day or night. I made sure that there was always decent something to eat in the fridge whatever the time of day it might be.
One Sunday night a couple of months after I’d arrived in town, Mary and I were enjoying a nice tea and a very nice glass of wine when she asked,
“Have you given any thoughts to moving on?”
“Are you trying to get rid of me?”
“No, but when you arrived you gave me the impression that you were here and then you’d be gone.”
I remembered my non-committal statements from that time.
“Actually, I like it here. You are a great Boss and… yes I want to stay.”
Mary grinned back at me from the other side of the table.
“I’m glad. You fitted in here as if you’d been born to the job.”
“I guess being on the other side of the coin so to speak and having people do everything for me made me appreciate things a little better.”
“Most people who had been in that life wouldn’t know the first thing about running a household.”
“Well, I was different. I knew that I’d be there for a limited time. I never expected to be with him for as long as I did. But because I’d come from below stairs in the first place, I got to know what it was that the staff were doing for me. Besides, being decent and civil to them was not that hard. They were in the main a decent bunch of people.”
“Well, you certainly have eased my workload around here.”
“Great, so pour me another glass of wine then we can order me some proper uniforms.”
Mary was just taking a sip of wine almost choked on it.
“What? What did you just say?”
“I said that we need to buy me some proper uniforms. You have one for your duties. I want one for mine. One that will put me firmly in my place at the bottom of the ladder, which is where I want it. You really don’t want to know how much effort I had to put into making sure that I looked like a million dollars every minute of the day.”
Mary glared at me. Then she looked skywards and muttered a few words to herself.
“Why did I let my Sister persuade me to give you a job… I get a distinct feeling that I will live to regret this.”
“No Mary you won’t. I just want to look the part for my role.”
“Don’t you want to be my friend? This job has real disadvantages when it comes to friends. It is very difficult to get proper friends. This collar opens lots of doors but it also closes a lot. While you are here, you are my friend ok.”
“Yes Boss,” I replied grinning.
She just shook her head.
Ordering uniforms for me proved to be harder than it looked. I wanted a flared skirt. One that would allow me to wear at least one fairly stiff petticoat. It all originated from the first time I saw Alice in Wonderland. From that moment on, I wanted to be Alice. Now I had my chance. When I was with Liam and once I had some cleavage and a bum he wanted me to show off my assets but I toed the line at micro-skirts. My legs were just not up to it so to compensate, most of my clothing was tight. One or Two sizes under tight was the norm and that included bras. Well, he paid for it all so I obliged. I dressed to please him in my role as his ‘wife’. Now it was my turn to dress appropriately in my role as housekeeper. For the first time since I had got breasts, I was wearing a properly sized and fitting bra. Liam insisted that I flash my assets at every opportunity so it felt good and there was no way I was going back to the old style. So it was loose and easy fitting and definitely not gaudy in colour for me for the foreseeable future.
A week of fruitless evening searching later, I knocked on Mary’s door.
“Have you finished your sermon yet?”
“Just about. What is it that couldn’t wait until the morning?”
As she spoke I entered her room. Then I stopped dead. She was wearing the skimpiest negligée known to man.
“Sorry. I’ll come back tomorrow."
“Stop right there, young lady. You will do no such thing.”
“Sorry but…”
“Oh this. Look Jess, this is my home. I have to put on a brave face all day every day. Here in my bedroom, I like to be a woman. Does this not say ‘hell, I’m a woman’?”
“Yes but…”
I had to squeeze my legs together as I was cruelly reminded that I still had a set of fully functioning male parts between my legs.
“Sorry Jess. I can see you are embarrassed. Why don’t I meet you downstairs in a couple of minutes?”
I sloped off before I said something that would embarrass me and her. But she was fucking beautiful.
Five minutes later Mary joined me downstairs. She put a sweatshirt on over her top and a pair of shorts.
She sat down beside me and took my hand.
“Am I right in thinking that you don’t fancy men?”
“Yes.”
“But you said that you lived with one as his wife for years.”
“I did but strictly as his Trophy Wife. Liam is mostly gay, but a bit bi. His Business Manager is his lover. But many of his business deals were with people who… well being out as a gay with them would not be good for business. I was strictly for show but it was worth it because he paid for what you see in front of you.”
“But you didn’t go the whole way?”
I shook my head.
“I never wanted to face that question. It is the ultimate step. If I were attracted to men then maybe I would have had it all chopped off but as I said, the question never arose when I was with him.”
There was a silent moment between us.
“This is your home and I should not make you change your life. I won’t go into your bedroom again unless it is to clean or change the bed.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I do Mary. If I don’t then… well you know what might happen and neither of us wants that do we?”
She didn’t answer.
“Anyway, you wanted to ask me something earlier?” she said changing the subject.
I sighed.
“I’m not having a lot of luck finding the sort of uniform I want.”
“Ok show me what you have found so far.”
We spent the next twenty minutes going through the sites that I’d been browsing. Mary laughed when I told her what I style I wanted to wear.
“Well, that’s certainly different.”
She thought for a moment before saying,
“What about those German things…. Dirndls, I think they are called?” she suggested.
A few minutes surfing brought several guffaws from the pair of us.
“Nearly but plain dark blue or black or grey with a white Apron. That’s what I want. Then white full petticoats.”
“Then it might be that you have to get them made.”
“I was afraid of that. Is there anyone in town that could do it?”
“There is but I wouldn’t use them.”
“Why?”
“Gossip. It would spread like wildfire the moment you walked into the dress-makers shop.”
“Ah. I get it.”
“Let me make some calls. I regularly speak to other women priests. One of them might know of someone who could make the garments you want.”
“But what do you think of them?”
Mary smiled.
“You know, I like them. I was joking when I mentioned a uniform but you know I love it. I think you will look very smart. The Ladies Circle will have a lot to chinwag about when they see you wearing them.”
Then she added,
“But, there is nothing they could object too. They tell the world that you are my housekeeper.”
Mary was true to her word and a few days later she came bounding into the kitchen waving a bit of paper. I was shelling some peas I'd picked earlier from the vicarige garden.
“I have found somewhere to get your dresses made.”
“Where?”
“Durham.”
“Durham? But, that’s miles away.”
“And perfect for not attracting any gossip. My friend the Rev Victoria Mortimer is a priest at the Cathedral there, knows of a shop in the City that can provide everything you want.”
I sighed.
“We are pretty busy this week aren’t we?”
“Rubbish. You go tomorrow. Train to Leeds and change there. I’ll get Vicky to meet you at the station.”
“I suppose so.”
“Good. I’ll phone her back to tell her.”
As Mary turned away I said,
“Mary, am I really meeting your expectations?”
She stopped dead in her tracks.
“What a silly question. Of course you are. If you hadn’t I’d have told you. You are doing more than I expected. Why the question?”
“I’m not but I don’t want to cause you trouble. I was silly to want those uniforms. Half the Ladies Circle would probably keel over and die if I wore them. The last thing I want is to cause you embarrassment. I’m sorry for putting you to so much trouble. We’d best forget the whole thing.”
“We will do nothing of the sort. You were right. I have my uniform. My housekeeper should have hers. Ok, so yours is somewhat unconventional but they are not risqué or revealing. The Uniforms stay and that’s my final answer.”
Mary’s tone told me that she’d bought into the idea which was my plan all along. After years of wearing designer clothes that usually fell apart after a single outing, it was nice to be wearing normal department store clothes but I wanted something different. The uniforms would set me apart.
Events conspired so that it was Monday before I was ‘put on the train’ by a determined Mary.
Her parting words were,
“Don’t forget, Vic will be waiting for you at the Station. You can’t miss her.”
She was right. Vic was immediately recognisable. Well, they couldn’t be many very leggy blondes, quite a bit over 6ft tall and wearing a Dog Collar now can there. To put it bluntly, she was gorgeous. I did wonder for half a second if all women Clergy were like her and Mary?
“Are you Victoria?” I asked slightly timidly as I approached her.
“Yes. I take it that you are Jess?”
“That I am.”
“Good. Let’s go I’m parked in a twenty-minute spot and my time is almost up,” replied Vic as she turned and headed for the station exit.
“We’ll take my car and park at the Cathedral. Then we have to walk I’m afraid. The part of the city where we are going is pedestrianized.”
“That’s ok. Mary warned me that might be the case.”
Fifteen minutes later, we were outside the shop. Vic put her hand on my arm.
“Mary told me about you. Dom and Lou are ok with people such as you.”
Then she grinned.
“They make some of the most wonderful pride dresses.”
It took me a second to realise what she’d just said. Then it dawned on me.
“Thanks for that.”
Then it also dawned on me that she wasn’t coming into the shop with me.
“Are you not coming in with me?”
“Sorry. I’ve got a class to take at the ‘Y’ but Dom will give me a call when you are done and we can go for Lunch and a tour of the Cathedral. I want the latest gossip on Mary.”
That was it, she was gone.
It turned out that Dom and Lou were former Tailors from London but had moved north so that they could follow a slightly slower pace of life. Then they’d gotten involved with the local LGBT scene and soon they were had more business than they knew how to handle.
They made me very welcome and after a cup of tea, we were in a back room where Dom did the measuring and Lou took down the details. Several times I laughed because they had this habit of finishing each others sentences. Lou would start one, Dom would finish and begin another and Lou would end it.
“Well Darling, we have been together for more than Forty years,” commented Lou when I mentioned it.
“We are just like any married couple,”
“Speak for yourself Darling. Just as long as I don’t get to wear the dress.”
And so it went on.
My measurements were soon taken and noted in a large leather bound ledger. Then we discussed material and the finer points of the designs.
Dom got very enthusiastic when I mentioned petticoats.
“Not enough women today know how to wear them,” he exclaimed.
“How should you wear them?” I asked feigning ignorance.
“Well, we think that they should be worn at the same length as the skirt. Not below, not above.”
“I think I get it,”
We spent the next hour going over the fine details of each dress. Every one of the sixteen yes, sixteen dresses and twelve petticoats would be slightly different design and colour.
Vic returned to the shop just we’d finished everything and a sizeable amount of money had been exchanged.
“All done?” asked Vic.
“We are,” replied Lou.
“And she’s going to look great,” added Dom.
“In our wonderful creations,” said Lou completing the sentence.
Vic laughed.
“You two are the greatest.”
“We know,”
“But thanks for the comment anyway.”
Vic took me to a small Bistro for Lunch.
Once we’d ordered she asked,
“So how is Mary? Did she say that we shared a flat when we were in training?”
“Mary is… Mary. Well that’s what I think. I owe her a lot. She gave me refuge when I needed it.”
“Ha, ha. That’s Mary to a ‘T’. I wondered how you met her.”
Then she dug into her voluminous bag and pulled out a dog eared copy of ‘Hello’.
“This is you isn’t it?”
My heart sank. There was a picture of me at the previous years ‘Royal Ascot’. I’d been there with Liam and entertained his guests.
“Yes that’s me, the phoney wife.”
“You weren’t married then?”
I looked at Vic and saw the cheeky grin on her face.
“We wore wedding rings and people assumed that we were married. That was the aim of it. I played a part and he paid for me to look like this,” I replied in a matter of fact way.
“Didn’t you have some good times?”
“Oh yes. I went to places and saw things I could have only… well, you know. It was my multi-year finishing school of luxury and hard knocks.”
“Hard Knocks?”
“Being the trophy or fake wife is not as easy as it looks. Firstly, there are the men. His business took him to all sorts of places. Places where getting into bed with me was the name of the game. I got a reputation for being cold as well as more bruises on my ass than I could count. Then there are the wives. They are worse. Firstly, a lot of them almost expect for their husbands to get me into bed. If I don’t then they take it as an insult because they think their husbands are not good enough for me. Those that don’t want me to bed their husbands are trying to bed mine. That was the final straw. I caught him in bed with his New York Office Manager despite her claims that she was a lesbian and he was gay. It made me realise that I was an appendage that could and would more than likely be discarded in the near future. So I left him instead of it being the other way round.”
“Wow! That is some confession.”
I laughed.
“Not a confession. Just me realising that I my time was up and that I had to make the break.”
“Mary told me how you changed trains and ended up on her doorstep. I didn’t believe it at the time but now that I’ve met you, I can believe it.”
I must have blushed. Any more revelations were spared by our meal arriving.
After Lunch, we walked to the Cathedral. When we were along, I asked Vic,
“How much about me did Vic tell you?”
Vic laughed.
“If you are wondering about your dangly bits then yes she told me. If I hadn’t have known, I would never have guessed. To be honest darling, you are a very feminine woman and I know many genetic women who aren’t as feminine as you. Was that what you meant?”
“Not really. As Mary’s ‘bff’, I just wondered how much she told you. I’ve never had a ‘bff’,” I replied sadly.
Vic didn’t answer but gave me a big hug right in the middle of the aisle of Durham Cathedral.
Vic then gave me the grand tour of the Cathedral. I was a stunning building. BM (before Mary I hadn’t been inside a church since I played one of the three kings in my primary school Nativity play a long, long time in the past.
Mary had given me an insight into a different world. A world where money and the acquisition of more and more of it, did not dominate every waking day and night. The atmosphere inside the building was for me intensely spiritual.
“May I sit for a while?” I asked Vic.
“Yes of course. It hits you doesn’t it?”
“Hit what?”
“The atmosphere, the peace.”
“Yes, yes it does. In this short time, it has grown on me.”
Vic sat beside me and spoke softly.
“I was a bad girl. I hung out with all the wrong people and had several scrapes with the law. Then one day, my school went on a visit to Canterbury. Three girls and I bunked off from the schedule and we went into the Cathedral. The others took a look at the inside and then headed off to the nearest McDonalds. I just stood there transfixed for what seemed hours. The beauty, the solace, the sense of peace just invaded every pore and cell in my body. It was then that I decided to become a Priest. Mary helped me in oh, so many ways. It is good for me to help you and her for a change.”
As much as I tried, I could not stop the tears from coming. Vic put her arm around me and we sat for a good half hour. No words were exchanged. There was no need.
The moment was ended by a party of Japanese Schoolgirls being shown around the building. Their guide kept up a running commentary in a very loud voice.
I got so annoyed I stood up and went over to the guide and said in a loud voice,
あなたは、ノイズを抑えることができますしてください。これは神聖な場所です。
(Can you please keep the noise down. This is a holy place)
The guide looked startled but took the hint and carried on her tour but with a lot less shouting.
“Where did you learn to speak Japanese?” asked Vic.
“I learned it for Liam so that I could understand what the wives were saying. I can also speak Spanish, half decent Cantonese and Arabic and enough Russian to swear like a trooper.”
Vic laughed.
“Mary said that there was a lot more to you than meets the eye. She was not wrong. I hope you two will be happy together.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence in me Vic but we aren’t an item.”
“Pull the other one sweetie. I see the glint in your eye when you talk about her.”
There was no way I could answer that.
Vic came to my rescue.
“I have a little bit of business to attend to. Are you ok sitting here? I should be back in twenty to thirty minutes.”
“Sure. Off you go.”
I watched her disappear and thought back to her comment about Mary and me. She was right. Every since that night when I went into her room. Then all the problems it would cause began to rear their ugly head.
“No, it can’t happen,” I said out loud but quietly.
I’d been sitting there a while when I felt someone sit next to me. I turned to look at them and got a shock. Someone from my life with Liam was sitting right next to me.
“Donna? What on earth are you doing here?”
“Well, I could say the same about you Jess?” replied the much older woman who was grinning from ear to ear, then she added,
“I thought it was you but you’ve changed a lot but then when you brushed your hair back with the back of your hand, I knew it was you.”
“I’m sitting here enjoying the atmosphere.”
“Where’s Hubby Liam?”
I shook my head.
“Don’t know. Don’t care,” I replied in a matter of fact way.
“What! You left him?”
“It is not as if we were really married.”
“I wondered. You never argued. Really married couples argue all the time.”
“Perhaps. Where is Dimitri? As far as I knew, he never let you out of his sight?”
“Sight is one thing he does not have at the moment. Cataracts. He’s in a private clinic not far from here.”
“Will you tell him about me?”
She shook her head.
“As I said, you’ve changed. You seem a calmer happier person. Can’t say that for the clothes but I guess he left you with nothing.”
“I left him and yes I had nothing. But I have found some inner peace. Especially here today.”
“It is a beautiful building.”
“How long are you going to be on Dimitri’s arm?”
Donna flashed her wedding ring.
“It's been almost twenty years so far so it's gonna cost him a few mil to buy me out but I’m happy for the time being.”
Then she looked at her very expensive and very blingy watch.
“Gotta dash. Dimitri’s men will soon be sending out the search parties after me,” said Donna standing up.
I put my hand on her arm.
“You meant it about not letting on that you’d seen me?”
“Darling, you look happier than I’ve ever seen you. If there is someone out there making you this happy then go for it. I won’t let on.”
I stood up and hugged her. As I did so, I whispered,
“Yes there is someone and yes she does make me happy.”
Donna broke off the hug and after looking at me for a second blank faced, she grinned.
“Good for you, girl.”
Then she was gone.
I sat back down and tried to comprehend what had just happened. A blast from the past had come into my life for an instant and breezed out again. I was glad that I was a long way from Skipton when the meeting took place. It was a reminder of my past life and not one atom in me wanted it back.
Vic re-appear a little later.
“Vic, about what you said before?”
Vic smiled.
“I was just just speaking the truth. Mary is a good person and is really lucky to find someone like you.” said Vic with a very resigned tone in her voice.
I smiled back a Vic.
“Vic, to put it bluntly, you are a hot looking woman. I’m sure there is someone out there who would love to love you and not get bothered by the ‘dog collar’.”
Vic whispered in my ear,
“But they’d have to be a woman,”
“That does not matter, what I said still stands. There is someone out there who is right for you.”
Then I looked at my watch and said,
“Vic, I think I should go. I have a train to catch.”
As I watched Durham disappear from view, I realised that Vic was just as complex a person as me. Mary on the other hand was relatively simple person. Vic was different than the old me in that she had a purpose in life. Until I found Mary, I really didn’t have one but I did now.
[To be continued in Part 3]
My journey back to Skipton was not the one that I’d expected when Mary dropped me at the station that morning. I felt an inner calmness and that was strange to me. I’d been excited about getting those dresses made for me but after the incident in the Cathedral, it was as if they didn’t matter any more.
Mary met me at the station. In an instant she noticed that I was different.
“Did Vic give you the tour?”
I nodded.
“It got to you didn’t it?”
“Yes it did. As much as I didn’t want it to, it did.”
Mary laughed.
“I could tell it was something like that. Your eye makeup is a mess.”
Her effervescent aurora brought me out of my stupor. I laughed.
“I’m sorry for that. I guess the place did get to me. The history, the peace and the beauty.”
“York is better though. We must go sometime. I can give you the tour.”
“Ok but not just yet. I don’t think I can take all that… in anything but small doses.”
“Same here but don’t tell anyone,” confessed Mary.
The day ended with the pair of us demolishing a nice bottle of wine. It had been quite a day.
Life returned to normal at the Vicarage. People around the town even started to call me by my name. It was as if I was carving out a niche for myself in the community. That alone made me feel happy but also unsure about the future.
One day, I’d been out to the Market getting some Shin of Beef for our evening meal when I met Mary running down the road.
“What’s the hurry? Has Mrs Clarke finally popped her clogs?”
“No. They’ve arrived.”
“What or who has arrived?”
“Your uniforms,” she whispered.
“Oh.”
“What’s up? Don’t you want them any longer?”
“It is not that.”
Mary took one look at my face and got the message.
“Come home and let all out to Auntie Mary.”
I just nodded and followed her like a lamb.
“Sit yourself down and Auntie Mary will put the Kettle on.”
I couldn’t help notice the big box on the table. I couldn’t face the contents for a while. While Mary was filling the kettle, I moved the box out of the kitchen and into the hallway.
Just doing that made me feel a bit better.
Mary sat down and put two mugs of tea down in front of us.
“Now tell Auntie Mary what is troubling you.”
I looked at the cup and at the steam coming off the hot liquid for some time. Many people would have given up but Mary is like most priests, a born listener.
“I’m afraid.”
“Afraid of what?”
“Of everything.”
“Nonsense. You can’t be afraid of everything. Are you afraid of me?”
“No.”
“Well then. You aren’t afraid of everything. So what are you really afraid of?”
I stared at the cup again.
“I’m afraid of being too comfortable. Comfortable here and comfortable with you.”
Mary gave a sharp intake of breath.
“Of shit Jess. Are you saying what you think you are saying?”
I nodded my head before replying,
“My trip to Durham made me realise that I’ve fallen in love with this place and even more with you. Mrs Chamberlain spoke to me today at the market as if I’d been here forever. It started to hit me then. I was comfortable, happy and content with things.”
“What are you rabbiting on about?”
“I don’t want those sodding dresses and I’m going to leave because I’ve fallen in love with someone who can’t return it. Someone who can’t be seen in a relationship with me for obvious reasons.”
“And that someone is me?”
“Yes.You. Oh why do you have to be a sodding Vicar?”
Mary laughed for a second but soon she regained her composure.
“Are you sure that I’m not just a convenient replacement for him?”
“I never loved him. He’s a man.”
Neither of us said anything for a while.
Then I said,
“I’ll work out my notice and go. That way the gossips won't chatter too much. Say the end of the month?”
“You will do no such thing,” replie Mary being form for once.
“Why? Why ever not?”
Then Mary reached over the table and took my hand.
“Because did it not occur to you that I might have feelings for you too.”
That was not the answer I was expecting. Never in a million years.
“But your position here?”
“I know. You really don’t want to know how much sleep I’ve lost recently trying to reconcile that question. The only viable answer is for me to leave the ministry if we are to be together. The introduction of Women priests was a big step but, the Church is most certainly not yet ready for what appears to be Lesbian Clergy even if there are some already working in parishes. So let us have no more talk of you leaving until we can work things out for us. Understand?”
All I could do was to nod my head.
“Right, now it is time to try on those lovely dresses. Yes?"
“Yes."
A few minutes later in my bedroom, the package had been opened and the contents poured over.
“These are wonderful,” exclaimed Mary.
“Vic’s friends have done you proud.”
“I have to admit they do look nice.”
“Well try one on then. One petticoat or two?”
Her joke made me laugh.
“Ok, two,” I said stripping off my skirt and blouse.
We spent the next hour playing dress-up. The sheer act of truing the different outfits made me awful lot happier.
When we’d done, Mary said,
“Why don’t you fix your makeup and get dressed, that black one with the scoop neck plus three petticoats would do very nicely. Put on some heels and we’ll go out for the evening. I don’t think either of us is in the mood to cook anything. There’s a nice pub near the station in Barnoldswick that I’ve been meaning to visit for some time.”
Twenty minutes later I came downstairs wearing the black dress, a white blouse and black heels. I’d also put on some nearly black tights. I thought I looked pretty decent.
Mary was waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs. She’d put on a very nice LBD and there was no trace of her ‘dog collar’. She’d also put on some heels and black tights.
“Ready?” asked Mary.
“I think so.”
We’d just finished eating our main course and the episode of earlier in the day have almost been forgotten when disaster struck. The saying, ‘It never rains but it pours’ was never truer.
“Fancy a desert?” asked Mary.
I was about to reply when I felt that someone was standing close by.
I turned around to find Liam standing there smiling.
“Hello Jess. Are you going to ask me to sit down?”
“Liam… What are you doing here?”
“Well, are you going to ask me to sit down or do I have to stand here attracting attention?”
“No, we were just leaving.”
I stood up and said to him,
“I have nothing to say to you. I said all I wanted to say when I left you.”
Then I turned to Mary,
“Are we going?”
“Yes we are.”
She stood up and went face to face with Liam.
“Jess said everything she wanted say to you when she left you. I don’t know what your game is but don’t mess with me. I have God on my side.”
Then she gripped my hand and then gave me a long and very passionate kiss right there in the middle of the pub and with a good few people watching us.
Then we left the pub as I mentally thanked god for the fact that we’d paid for our drinks and food when we ordered them.
Mary drove us home with her hand in mine as much as possible. I was visibly shaking.
Back at the Vicarage Mary tried to comfort me.
“I sure put a flea in his ear.”
“Don’t be too sure. He is a very powerful man and you insulted him in public. He won’t like that.”
“I don’t care. You made it clear that you did not want to speak to him.”
“He is still a very powerful man. People do not cross him and get away with it.”
Mary thought for a moment. Then she smiled.
“I had better get first blow in then hadn't I?”
She reached for the phone and dialled a number from memory.
“Hello Charles. Mary Hammond here. Is the Archbishop free?”
“Yes I will.”
A few seconds later the Archbishop came on the line.
“Good Evening Archbishop.”
“I’m fine.”
“No this is not a social call. You may be receiving a complaint about my behaviour tonight.”
“No. I kissed someone in Public to avoid a messy scene between two former lovers.”
“The… the fact is that the person I kissed is a woman. My housekeeper in fact. If you want it then I’ll resign my post in a flash but it was the only thing I could do to avoid a scene. She didn’t want to speak to him so I had to act. I am afraid that my good Samaritan act may backfire not only on my but on you and the Diocese.”
“Thank you your grace. I will. Goodnight.”
Mary put the phone down with a wry smile on her face.
“The A-B says that I did the right thing.”
I shook my head in disbelief.
“You really don’t know how powerful the A-B is. He has the PM on speed dial.”
“Well, I said what I wanted to say. If I have too then I’ll resign.”
Before I could say anything Mary added.
“Then again I might just do that anyway.”
“Why? It is your career. You are a very natural Vicar. You have a kind heart and people respond to you. I hear only good words about you in town.”
“Thank you for the compliments. But I meant what I said earlier. I have feelings for you as well. I didn’t know what I was missing in my life until you breezed into it and knocked it all over the place.”
“But…” I tried to grasp a straw, any straw.
“But what about your sister and your family? They all have to live here.”
“Yes. I know but if we are discrete about it then no one will know.”
“You’d do that for me?”
“Not for you, for us.”
My mouth emulated a dying fish.
“Now get upstairs and get ready for bed. I’ll join you.”
“Bed? The two of us? Together?”
“Not that but I think we both need a cuddle tonight. It has been quite a day for both of us.”
We were both very edgy the following day. I was dreading a knock at the door from Liam. When nothing came we breathed a sigh of relief. Mary was happy but I feared that it was the calm before the storm.
We tried to act normally but it was very hard. In the evenings we spent a lot of time talking about us and the future.
In the end, the storm hit three days after the episode in the Pub. I was alone in the vicarage. Mary was away on Church Business. The knock that I’d been dreading came just before 4pm.
I opened the door and saw Parker, Liam’s driver and general fixer-upper.
“Hello Miss. Nice to see you again.”
“Hello Parker. Where is he?”
“In the car Miss.”
“Waiting for the all clear I presume?”
“Yss miss, something like that.”
While I was trying to work out what to do, Parker said,
“If you don’t mind me saying Miss, this wasn’t my idea. I did everything I could to stop him but he hired literally dozens of Private Dicks to find you. You have certainly burried yourself deep here.”
Then he grinned.
"Being housekeeper to a Vicar was probably the least likely job I would have expected you to have. Well done."
“How did they find me?”
“Just by luck. One of them was on a train in Leeds. He saw you on the station. They eventually tracked you down to this neck of the woods. They saw you in town the other day and took your picture. Mr Liam was flying to New York. He turned the jet around as soon as he got saw that it was really you.”
“He says he loves you Miss.”
“Well, I don’t love him. I don’t now and have never loved him. What we had was a business arrangement. Even you knew that right from the outset. But thank you Parker for telling me that. Why don’t you make yourself scarce for a while I sort of Mr 'high and mighty' Liam once and for all?”
“Yes Miss. Good Luck.”
Then he added,
“You are looking good. You seem to have found your place in life. I’m very happy for you.”
I almost went and hugged him on the spot but that would have deflected me from what I had to do next.
I walked out to the car where Liam was waiting. He was in the Rolls. Everyone in Town would know that he’d been here. A big flashy Rolls with personalised number plates is hard to hide in a small town like Skipton.
I opened the rear passenger door and got in.
“Why Liam, why?”
“I missed you.”
“Well I didn’t miss you. I said everything I wanted to say in my note to you. I have built a life for me here. People know me by name not as someone who is apparently your wife. I’m done with that. Got it?”
“Well marry me and make it legit.”
“No Liam I will never marry you. I don’t love you. You are gay one moment, hetro the next, gay the next. I’m now a woman and in with love another woman. Being your wife all these years was all an act. You should know that because you set it all up in the first place. I did everything we agreed. You kept your side of the deal. Actually, did more than keep mine. Two years you said. How long did play that role eh? Never mind. When I said I was done, I meant it. I’m not going back. EVER!”
I swallowed hard.
“Yes, you made me into what you see before you. That was business. But I needed a life outside of looking pretty for you. I had nothing to do. You wouldn’t even let me learn to ride a horse in case I fell off and spoiled my looks.”
I glared at him hard.
“I was fucking lonely. Pure and simple. You wouldn’t let me have friends, real friends. Not those plastic and botox enhanced fifty-year old wives who seem to dress like twenty-year old hookers but people my own age that I could relate to. God knows that I tried to get you to listen but there was always some deal in the offing so you put me off by saying ‘later babe’.”
“Oh, and your money and all that it stands for is not important. I have found people here who treat me as a real person not, your appendage. If I go out without makeup on then no one cares. I have a life. A life that I craved for. A life that you could not give me.”
“Do you love her?”
“Yes I do. We spend each night in the same bed. Mary has already spoken to the Archbishop about our little kiss in Public. She will resign if asked to do so. So please go back to wherever you have parked whichever one of your Lear-Jets you are using at the moment and go somewhere very far away and GET LOST preferably for the next twenty years at least.”
With that, I got out of the car and slammed the door behind me. But being a Rolls, the Car knew better and the door did a soft landing much to my annoyance.
I’d walked a couple of steps before I turned around and went back to the car and opened the door again.
“If there was one thing I learned from you and that is to never ever go back on a decision made from the heart. I made the decision to leave from the heart. You deserve to know that much."
Then I left him sitting in the car just staring out of the window.
When I got back to the house, Parker was nowhere to be seen. Sitting on the hall table, there was a large A4 envelope with the words ‘You earned this. Make her happy’ written on the front. Inside was a wad of share certificates for a US Company that Liam had invested in not long after I first met him. I remembered that I’d had to persuade him that it was a good investment. I knew in an instant that they were worth an awful lot of money just because their product line appealed for young women and not stuffy middle aged men or techno geeks. We’d joked at the time but Liam had put a good wad of the shares in my name. I’d forgotten all about them. I suspected that Liam had done the same.
I sat down and wept for a while.
I’d just about packed everything when Mary returned from day out. Her good mood changed immediately when she saw the cases by the door.
“I take it that has he been here then?”
“Yes. He appeared about four.”
Mary came over to me and took my hands in hers and looked me in the eyes.
“I saw the A-B and tendered my resignation. He didn’t want to accept it but I persuaded him that it would be best in the long run. I will announce it on Sunday. Then in one month we can be together. Can you last that long?”
We kissed passionately for almost a minute.
“I can wait for you. No matter how long it takes.”
“I can’t wait to be free. Free to marry you.”
“Thank you darling.”
Then I showed her the envelope.
“I’d forgotten all about this. I had to really work hard to get Liam to invest in this company. As a joke he put twenty-five percent of the investment in my name. Now they are worth a small fortune. I think the last market valuation I saw was around 60 million dollars. Apparently, I own 4% of it. Parker must have remembered that these were in my name not his.”
“Parker must have thought the world of you,”
“Yes he did. He always said that I was the daughter he never saw grow up.”
Mary hugged me tight.
We put the unexpected windfall to one side and we both agreed that now Liam had shown his hand, our exit plan could be put into action.
“Do you want me to call Vic as we agreed?” asked Mary.
“No. I did that a little while ago. She will be expecting me around midnight.”
“Midnight? Why so long?”
“I am going round the houses, up hill, down dale. I don’t want to put Vic in any danger. I still don’t know if he has given up so better safe than sorry eh?”
“Better I don’t know then?"
“Yes darling. Better you don’t know,” I said before giving her a very long kiss.
Vic met me late that night at Durham station like before. I’d travelled into Leeds and back out again on the slow train to Carlisle and then to Durham via Newcastle.
Her beaming smile gave me a big lift. As we met up, she wrapped her arms around me and gave me a hug.
“You are just what Mary needs in her life. I knew that the moment I met you.”
Her kind words almost brought me to tears.
“Hey, I’ll have none of those waterworks. Those can wait until I marry the pair of you.”
[Two months later]
Vic was true to her word in that she married Mary and Jeffrey McGee in a simple ceremony at a church high up on the Pennines. Jeffrey McGee was a name plucked from the phone book and was mine for a day as I changed it for the wedding and then I changed it again and took Mary’s surname. Thus began the married life of Mary and Jess Hammond.
[A further three months later]
“Well Darling what do you think?” I asked as we stood outside a property on the edge of Thetford Forest.”
“It ticks all the boxes and will be the perfect place to raise our children,” replied Mary as she patted her stomach. We’d found out that she was six weeks along only the previous day. Then she added,
“The sandy soil will be perfect for raising veggies.”
“Well I’d better put an offer in then.”
“Yes you’d better do that.”
“Yes Mrs Boss.”
Then I kissed her. We did that a lot.
My heart wasn’t lonely any longer as it had found a mate for life.
[The End]
A Verse from the song ‘Owner of a Lonely Heart’ by Yes.
After my own indecision
They confused me so
Owner of a lonely heart
My love said never question your will at all
In the end you've got to go
Look before you leap
Owner of a lonely heart
And don't you hesitate at all - no no
This song along with reading an article on ‘trophy wives’ inspired this story.
[The end]