Allergic To Cotton

Disclaimer:

This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to locations, persons living or dead is purely coincidental. There is also sex between consenting partners over the age of 18 which may include sexual fetish elements and role-playing. As always I write this for your enjoyment. A comment if able would be greatly appreciated. Hugs Mary Beth.

Synopsis:

An allergic reaction to cotton put Linus in the hospital. It was deadly to him now, but it wouldn’t really matter. What would matter was that they made diapers out of hemp. “Thank God for silks, satins, nylons, taffetas and chiffons,” his mother whispered as she folded and hung Mark’s new clothes.

Players:

Linus AKA Lucy (Step Mother Rose - Bickford), Cindy (Mother Alice - Carson), Mark (Mother Selma - Ricks), Rick (Mother Mandy - Anderson), Sally (Mother Grace - Mendes). Mandy (Margaret - Clearwater), Bruce (Mother Helen - Baker), Ernie and Eloise (Mother Marianne - Anderson), Susan (Mother Beatrice); Nurse Helen Baker. Tina from Good Will.

Story Chapters:

The Allergy
Home On Thursday
My Lingerie
Girl Time, first time
Diapers For The Princess
Baby Mode
Friday - My first day home.
Girl Training
Too Late To Go Back into the closet
Mom, we need to talk
Sunday Sorting through the dresses
Sunday’s Child
Monday
Tuesday
August
October
Halloween

THE ALLERGY

I don't remember much other than going to bed that Saturday feeling good for no good reason. I'd showered and there were fresh sheets on the bed and my step mother had made a five star dinner with my favorite desert. I was still full slipping between clean cool sheets, tired and feeling wonderful. That's how the day ended.

Sunday on the other hand began with pain, a terrible pain. The itch actually didn't wake me, itches never wake people I'd read that somewhere, although scratches sometimes do. I can say that part was true because my scratching woke me. The rash I was just starting to scratch had spread rapidly. Incredibly fast.

I would later find out this same rash was erupting in large splotches causing equally large areas to take on the same painful characteristics as first, then second degree burns. The same kind of damage to the skin brought on the same reaction and It was that pain that brought me awake.

It was dark at first but the clock on my night stand said early Sunday morning. I'd been scratching but had stopped because of the pain. I couldn't imagine what was causing that anguish as I turned for the light. It was growing worse. What I saw in the light horrified me. There was this terrifying burn like reddening in large areas on my legs that had spread to my chest and on my arms.

Even as I looked at it, areas grew and so did the pain.. There was no explanation and no understanding of what was happening. I was afraid and growing more so as areas of my body became increasingly painful to the touch while the itching grew more maddening. It felt like something was suddenly alive on me and that's when I screamed for help.

My screams brought my step mother to my room in an instant and she threw the overhead light on. In the brightness she saw what I saw and was even more shocked than I was. It was bad enough to scare her senseless. So bad that she wrapped me immediately in my blanket and rushed me to the emergency room.

She didn't know it but wrapping me in that blanket made it worse. I also think that's when the nurse slipped the pink band around my wrist mistaken me for a girl. I didn't weight much and stood just under five foot two which was well under a foot below my step mother so coming in wrapped in the blanket with my long hair dangling gave the wrong impression. I'm not blaming her, I'm just saying that's how I believe I ended up with a pink name band.

Which didn't matter in the least because in the emergency room I was in agony. I was thrashing enough to prompt my first shot and I could have kissed whoever it was that decided to sedate me. In any event the rest of that night and following morning was a chemical induced blur.

Sedation continued so I was out of it for most of the next few days. Being out of it was a good thing because when the sedative wore off I came back to a kind of itchy, burning hell with my hands and feet restrained to the side rails. I'd see faces, sometimes mom's, then a nurse would inject my IV with something and I’d go back to dreamland.

Fortunately nearing the forth day after multiple shots and IV drips of corticosteroids, pain killers, and antihistamines with continuous strips of treated gauze the worse passed. There was around-the-clock treatment of sterile, non-adhesive large compasses which because less painful each day.

Those treatments cleared the nastiest looking rash and somewhere near the third day they released my hands. One of the nurses even noticed I wasn't a girl and asked if I wanted the wrist band changed. I didn't much care and said so which she took as a no so I stayed pink.

Antibiotic ointments was gently applied under a soft macro fiber netting. Final treatments of Aloe Vera and soothing medicated baths slowly returned me to almost human. I was finally given real food and medically released. I went home on that fourth day.

They had discovered through some skin test and thanks to a smart internist that I was newly allergic to nearly every blend of cotton. Actually it would turn out to be a chemical within the cotton plant itself. It was the combination of chemicals and my special brand of puberty that started all of this.

That sudden onset of symptoms had more to do with a sudden hormonal imbalance than any thing else that night. Right after I went to sleep my pituitary gland decided it was time to release a luteinizing and follicle-stimulating hormone into my bloodstream. That mixture of two hormones was intended to start changing me which should have happened near the age of thirteen and didn’t.

Unlike most teenagers I didn’t go through puberty. I actually didn’t see the onset of puberty or those specific sexual characteristics as most teenage males might, so there were none of those physical or hormonal signs boys see. No chest hairs, no shaving and no ejaculations which mostly meant the tissue I tossed in the toilet was dry. On the flip side it also meant that I didn’t shave my body for diving like the other guys. Meaning I didn’t get teased either.

The downside was the doctor called testicles tiny and “unproductive”. It just meant they didn’t work right away. I was that 2% of adolescents that go into this sort of delayed mode for reproductive systems or what was known as hypogonadism. I use to joke with mom telling her I wish I’d known how safe I was going through school. Bottom line was I just missed the boat when my sex hormones flashed through the system that first time after birth.

The doctor also told my mother that I missed becoming a girl by “this” much. I didn’t know that part till I asked her why I had to have hormone shots for boys if I was already a boy? Anyway, that was why my pituitary gland happened to pick that night to spit out that luteinizing and follicle-stimulating hormone into my bloodstream. Or as they say, “if it wasn’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck at all.”

Of course it did as it was meant to do while also flooding my epidermis cells. Those cells each newly flushed for their changing role in the late puberty process simply reacted to those cotton enzymes. It was those enzymes produced by the cotton plant created long ago during photosynthesis. Most wouldn't notice or care. Unfortunately I wasn't most.

Just as unfortunate I was that 1 person in 100,000 who could not tolerate those enzymes. Those normally benign enzymes that stay in the cotton fibers even after manufacturing were now deadly to me. Simply put that "why now" was triggered by own body.

Life as I knew it was going to change radically and late puberty was going to be the least of my problems.

HOME ON THURSDAY

I tried to remember most all of what the doctor had said, but in truth ignored it. I just wanted my pants back and to get out of there. I was going to get out of there but getting my pants back was proving difficult. I'd joked with my step mom that becoming a man had gotten me there, but the only way out was going to be in a dress? It was some sort of cosmic joke. I couldn't even wear shorts under the dress because they were cotton.

Of course it wasn't a dress. It was a hospital gown but it was all my body could tolerate. But even the normal hospital gowns wouldn’t work so I got a girlish gown. Trouble was it showed. It was a pastel yellow snap closure gown made of a swishy silky polyester and clearly not meant for a guy.

It got very uncomfortable sitting in the wheel chair in something that looks like a dress. I couldn't even cover my legs with a blanket because they were cotton. What made it worse was the pink band around my wrist that I’d left on and my long hair I’d brushed that very morning. Mom didn’t say it but I knew I looked like a girl sitting down in the wheel chair.

The gown, knee length, rose just above my knees when I sat which meant I was forced to close my legs. Guys don't close their legs I thought but there I was doing just that and tugging at the hem of a "skirt". How many times had I seen girls doing that very same thing?

I was also suddenly regretting my long hair, and the fact I hadn't changed the band on my wrist. Mom noticed and whispered that both helped create the illusion that I was "not a boy". That comment didn't help I said because it also created the illusion "I was like a girl" as I sat there now not daring to tug at the hem of "my skirt".

"Are you ready to go home," my step mother Rose asked.

"Please," I answered and added in desperation, "and find me some pants."

"No pants! You heard the doctor," the nurse said coming into the room and handing me my hospital bag. That bag held the care package holding the tooth brush and things I'd been given when I was checked in. There was now an orderly who stood behind the wheel chair to push me out of the hospital.

The gown I was told was all I could wear till mom and I met the home health nurse which would be sometime that morning when we were at home. The drive wasn’t long and I sat at the table. Thankfully she called right after we got home. I was still wearing that same gown when my step mother and I met her an hour later. She was a take charge kind of woman when she came in and she joined us at our kitchen table.

Ms Helen Baker, or Nurse Baker, came into the house with authority right at the start. She put a large bag on the floor next to her and opened a brief case on a chair she pulled close to her knees. She introduced herself as an extension of the hospitals home care. She was going to be my "treatment nurse" during my "out patient status".

Nurse Baker was sent there to explain my prescriptions, slaves and talk about some key things I needed to do as post treatments. She was also there to share some technical information she had about my condition including some do's and don't's. Truth was, at least for the time being, I sat there just happy to be home. That slowly began to change.

"Obviously you've been through a terrible time and my first goal is to teach you how to avoid going through that again," Nurse Baker said and added, "beginning with what the doctor said about cottons! To put it bluntly, you can never wear cotton again! Not even blends Linus."

"I understand," I said reacting to the gravity in her voice.

"Good. That also means that label shopping from now on will be critical," Nurse Baker said and added, "and even more importantly if the material content isn't clear on that label then you must assume it has cotton in it. This too is critical! Understood?"

"Yes ma'am," I said. While my step mother nodded.

"That also means most, if not all of your clothing, can't be worn," Nurse Baker said and added, "this is so important Linus... Exposure to cotton could be life threatening now. Your body was at war with itself and during that war it's developed new defenses that it didn't have before. The next war will be even more devastating."

"I think I understand," I said suddenly fearful.

"When you say more devastating what does that mean," my step mother asked.

"If I was to put a piece of cotton on his skin right now his body would instantly react. Before his bout there was a build up against the cotton. That buildup took time. Now there will be no build up. Now the reaction will be instantaneous and if there is too much skin contact, it could literally be deadly," Nurse Baker said.

"Got it," Mom said.

"You've got to make sure to get rid of anything cotton. Jackets, pants, shirts, tee shirts, socks, underpants, gloves, anything made of cotton or cotton blends and if you can't read the label assume it’s cotton and toss it out" Nurse Baker said and added, "you can't use wash cloths, hand or dish towels or bath towels. That includes your bedding. All of it."

Meanwhile as she was talking Nurse Baker pulled a sheet of paper that listed sources for things I could wear once I started dressing again. She also started a new folder with that sheet of paper.

I caught the point she made when she said "started dressing again?" The fact that I was sitting there in what I considered a dress of sorts and anxious to get into anything that resembled boy's clothing made her comment very unnerving. It didn't sit will at all.

"What do you mean when you say when I start dressing again," I asked.

"Yes, well, as to that," Nurse Baker said as she added, "Linus, you're going to go though a very difficult time over the next few days of treatment, then additional treatments, a little less intense for a few weeks beyond that."

"How's that," I asked interrupting her immediately.

"I'm afraid you're going to have to do things no boy should have to put up with, but there it is," Nurse Baker said and then added in a lowered tone, "sometimes you've got to play the hand you've been dealt."

"I still don't understand? What does that mean," I asked.

"I'm a little confused myself," Linus's step mother added patting Linus's hand.

"I know this is difficult. For both of you but for you Linus most of all. It's really a medical issues, but if it helps this first part is short term. Anyway, for the time being you can't come into hard or direct contact with clothing," Nurse Baker said.

"What's hard contact mean," Linus asked.

"It just means anything that's likely to tug or scrap at your skin. Anything really snug. Linus, your entire epidermal has been bruised or damaged, and while it looks fairly healed it's not yet fully recovered. It needs a few more days and a little more treatment," Nurse Baker said and then added, “four days actually till the elasticity starts to fully return to your skin."

As she said that she pulled a bottle of lotion from her bag. That was followed by a box of latex gloves. She sat both at the center of the table explaining that the lotion was to be used on his body from his neck down asking his step mom to apply it at the back area while he applied it over his front.

His mom was to start at the back of his neck and he would start below the chin. The lotion would go on once a day in the morning following a shower with a medicated soap gently rubbed over the skin that she also pulled from the bag.

"Does hard contact include not wearing more dresses," I asked plucking at the one I was wearing.

"I understand how you're feeling. That's one of the things I meant about going through such difficult times, but that's also what I mean about how some thing can't be helped. Unfortunately in this case a gown like that still allows a level of modesty while minimizing contact with the skin," Nurse Baker said and added, "again, regrettably, at least for now, your condition warrants gowns."

When she said that she bent back over her bag and came back up with a stack of four new "gowns". They were neatly folded and she put those on the table next to the gloves, bar of soap and lotion.

"Wait a second, I've got to wear these," I said already knowing the answer..

"I'm afraid so. Nurse Baker said and added, "they are a thin lightweight polyester, and you'll need to wear a fresh one daily after your shower. One a day to minimize the risk of infection"

"They don't have snaps," I said looking at them in a mild shock. I’d picked the top one up and opened it a little to see if it had snaps at the back. They had rounded necks. It was a dress.

My step mother had picked up the lotion and had been reading the label till Nurse Baker brought the gowns up. When the gowns came up mom took up one of those herself and let it fall open to inspect it. They were in a kind of generic pastel yellow. They were sleeveless, like shifts and would go over my head.

"Those are dresses," I said.

"Lightweight shifts. Loose fitting and designed to just hang on your shoulders," Nurse Baker said.

"Dresses," I said in frustration.

"Make sure it's a shower and not a bath," Nurse Baker said ignoring what I’d said.

"What about under shorts," I asked knowing she wasn’t going to react.

"Out of the question. Definitely no shorts of any kind. Not even something lightweight," Nurse Baker said and then added, "in this case it's your waist Linus."

“What’s wrong with my waist,” I asked.

“With the exception of nighttime you cannot wear any clothing that comes in direct contact with your waist for another three days at least. Four if you see any redness at all, but three should be enough,” Nurse Baker said.

She went on to explain that this was mostly due to what she called lingering contact dermatitis. That contact dermatitis was a result of my original outbreak caused where the elastic of original shorts had been and ignored in the early moments of the emergency room. By ignoring my shorts there was more damage done.

"So no shorts," I said.

"Linus, moisture is going to be the key here. I'm not talking about outside moisture, but your own. Right now your secretions are actually poisonous. While the infection is still prevalent your body is still full of antibodies. Too many. You are literally still equipped with the proteins you produced to fight off the infection your body mounted in the hospital. It’s going to take a few more days to rid yourself of those." Nurse Baker said.

"So my sweat is bad," Linus asked.

"Really bad," Nurse Baker said and added, "as I noted, if we are not careful you could actually trigger another auto immune response.

"So I guess the gowns really are necessary," I said.

"No, the lotion is. The gowns are to help keep the lotion on and working," Nurse Baker said and added, "during the day. For your night sweats I'm afraid it's going to be diapers."

"Diapers," I repeated.

"Diapers," his step mother also repeated but with even more shock.

"Diapers? She just said diapers," I said back to mom then turning back to Nurse Baker daring her to repeat it.

"I did say diapers Linus and I'm truly sorry about those, and this is going to a bit more difficult than even the gowns I'm afraid," Nurse Baker said and added, "but like everything else these too are going to be necessary."

"This is insane," I said.

"Are those really necessary," his step mother asked.

"Mrs. Bickford," Nurse Baker said.

"Rose," Rose said and added, "please, call me Rose.

"Rose, I know he's been through seven kinds of hell over these past days but trust me, it's nothing compared to what it's like if it returns. I’m not kidding about that either. If it comes back it comes back with a vengeance. It could kill him. No, none of this is fair, but what happened to him I wouldn't wish on anyone," Nurse Baker said.

"What if I say no," I said.

"Honey, I can't make you do any of this. Not a bit of it. You can walk right up those stairs and ignore everything I've said, everything the doctor’s said, and take off that so called dress of yours and step into your old cotton shorts right now.” Nurse Baker said and then added, “in fact, I'll wait. I'll wait because within three to four minutes your mother's going to be dialing 911 and at least I'll wait here with her,"

“You’re serious,” I said.

Linus, trust me when I say this, if you survive this second episode, you'll wish diapers was all you had to put up with." Nurse Baker promised.

"Okay, I understand," Rose said.

"How about you Linus," Nurse Baker asked and added, "do you get it?"

"Yes ma'am," I said a little scared.

"Good," Nurse Baker said bending over her bag as she added, "now then, may I go on?"

"Yes," I said.

Nurse Baker had come into our house and kitchen with lots of paperwork in that briefcase of her's plus tons of stuff within that large carry bag So far it had produced those gowns and lotion and soap. When she mentioned the diapers she then pulled two packages of seven diapers each from that bag and laid both packages on the table before opening one to pull a sample free.

"Now these, just so you know, are custom made diapers," Nurse Baker said as she laid the sample on the table, but added, "although you've got two weeks worth which should be enough to get you through this current crisis."

I felt dejected. Life threatening or not I was looking at dresses and now diapers.

Custom made diapers no less and they were thick looking. It was very depressing. So much so my step mother reached over patting the back of my hand reassuringly. I also remember, in that embarrassing haze now engulfing me, the nurse actually apologizing and also being somewhat sympathetic. Suddenly that seemed worse. I had to do or say something.

"Why custom made," I asked trying to recover some of my dignity.

"First you need to understand that you're not wearing these diapers for the same reasons most wear diapers. Remember you're not wearing diapers because you're going to be wetting uncontrollably. You actually don't want to wet uncontrollably," Nurse Baker said and then added, "you're going to be wearing diapers because you need to stay as dry as you can possible be.”

“I’m not following this at all,” I said.

“Linus, during the day the lotion will take care of moisture when you’re wearing your dress. At night it's going to have to be the lotion and these diapers.. The diapers will wick the moisture away from your body,” Nurse Baker said.

"Okay, I think I get that," I said wishing with all of my might there was another word for diapers. She was also right about me not wetting diapers. I was eighteen, not a bed wetter so for me there was no good reason to be in diapers!

"No, I don't think you fully understand Linus so there is no need to feel so badly," Nurse Baker noted as she added, "you'll be wearing diapers for the second best reason for diapers which is for their absorbency. Absorbency and moisture control were critical for the short term."

"I'm confused. So I guess you're right. I didn't think I I fully understand why," I said.

"That's okay. Think of it as sleeping at night with absorbent towels surrounding you," Nurse Baker said and added, "for the time being and for the reasons I cited you cannot have any moisture around your genitals or between your legs. None at all. Again, the risk of a flair up was just too great.

This time my mom and I stayed quiet and just nodded. I was fighting a losing battle and knew it. Nurse Baker was going to finish what she had to say and nothing I said was going to change that.

"As I said, being wrapped or in this case cuddled in absorbent diapers will help wick away the normal moisture that occurs while sleeping. Again, this was critical," Nurse Baker said.

"Cuddled in diapers," I mumbled shaking my head. I think she took that shake of my head and mumbling as a kind of reluctant agreement.

"Again, it's your late puberty Linus. Right now that includes your night sweats I'm afraid. For the time being at least you're at high risk, very high risk of a relapse because of it. There are simply too many folds in your nether regions where moisture can collect," Nurse Baker noted and added, “too much moisture and you’ll trigger a response.”

It was becoming too much to hear. I wanted to scream for her to shut up which thankfully she did but it suddenly brought up a point I was dying to understand.

"Nurse Baker, you said I'm 1 in 100,000. That's pretty rare I suspect and since that's the case how is it you seem to have a bag of all these evil things in it just for me," I asked and then reasoning the logic of it even further I added, "I mean there can't be more than one or two like me in the whole state! Right?"

"You're right. In fact, it's just you so far as I know Linus," Nurse Baker said and then added, "but I'm a Post Treatment Nurse. I'm not a specialist in your actual case. In point of fact, I'm not treating your particular cause at all, I'm only treating the results of that cause If that makes sense?"

"It doesn't," I said now more confused than ever..

"Okay, let me put it a different way for you," Nurse Baker said and then added, "imagine if you come into the emergency room with a slash on your arm, and you're seen by a trauma nurse. That trauma nurse doesn't look for the cause of that slash, she looks at the slash itself and an immediate course of treatment for that slash. In that moment it's saving your life first. It's triage."

"Triage," I asked.

"Triage," Nurse Baker said and then added, "that nurse is assessing the damage and urgency for the patient. If you're bleeding to death the priority is to stop the bleeding. It's not going to do any good to start sewing up the arm if you're dead from loss of blood, that sort of thing.

"I think I see," I said.

"Exactly," Nurse Baker said and added, "that's why how that slash got there is of no consequence. The cause is superfluous at that moment. It could be from a car accident, mayhem, industrial, even self inflicted. It doesn't matter. With that said, she's treating the wound and she knows how to do that, and most wounds get the same sort of treatment no matter what the cause. I'm doing the same thing."

"So you're not treating my 1 in 100,000 thousand disease, you're treating the symptoms," I said.

"Exactly," Nurse Baker said and added, "but with a little case knowledge beforehand that there is additional risk that you can have a relapse for this or that. That's why I've read your case and talked with your physician."

"Okay, so I get it. I don't like it, but I get it," I said.

"Thankfully you'll get past this and you'll get past your late puberty," Nurse Baker said.

"Sooner rather than later I hope," I said laughing.

Nurse Baker noted I would most likely outgrow the need for diapers at some point, but to know that would require a quick swab and a chemical analysis in a lab at some future date. Keywords being "most likely" she warned.

She was very optimistic that my condition, like my late puberty, was not a permanent condition, as if, and at some point I would settle into adult. as an adult my resistance would help me get over my sensitivities. Unfortunately, again, I was that 1 in 100,000 who would have it rougher than most eighteen year olds.

I said that was an understatement. My step mom gave her own sarcastic laugh and agreed.

As for those diapers, the good news was there was no cotton in them. Nurse Baker actually said that to us as if that was exciting news. Why that would comfort me I'll never know but she seemed to think it would.

She then showed us the open diaper more to my mom than to me mostly because I wasn't paying too much attention to it. She was flipping it over once it was unfolded so we could see the outside and that the texture didn't suffer because of the fabric. She even insisted mom stroke the fabric in front of me.

Mom stroking the diaper in front of me was not settling at all and there was no way I was going to touch it. Nurse Baker also showed mom a paper on how to fold them as she continued caressing it. I was hoping my look was enough for mom to stop but mom didn't get the hint.

Nurse Baker even turned and smiled at me when she pointed at one of the pictures and said that the one she was pointing to in particular was the "best fold for boys". She actually slid the paper to me thinking I actually cared how the diaper looked folded. Truth was I didn't because I'd be laying on it. All I wanted to do was scream. The damn picture of the diaper being folded made me shudder.

I wanted to crawl under the table except for the fact that crawling away over being diapered was the wrong message to send to either women. There was crawling, and the fact I was wearing a hospital gown that was more like a dress with no underwear on. It was just bad all around and nothing I could do about it so I simply nodded and let her go on.

And she did...

It was the material next. She seemed proud of that. It was mostly imported from hemp I was told, and something called modal. Hemp Nurse Baker said was imported as a fiber from Cannabis of all things making me laugh. Nurse Baker stopped talking then and both she and my mother took on a curious look till I only snickered.

I thought for sure they got it?

When my step mom asked what was so funny I told her I probably wouldn't pass a drug sniffing dog wearing diapers made from hemp.

"You know - grass," I said.

My mom laughed then, but Nurse Baker didn't. I thought it was funny as hell and laughed again. It was hilarious. Mom snickered again, so she also got it, Nurse Baker didn't.

"Yes, but only if it wasn't soiled," my step mother mumbled back at me as she added, “you know, number two.”

There was a renewed round of laughter. It almost bordered on hysteria. I hadn't realized it but there had been a lot of tension up to then and suddenly the jokes, as lame as they were eased that tension.

My mother's joke, as funny as it had been made me cringe at the notion of me being the one soiling that diaper. It did however relieve a lot of anguish so I had to laugh. The nurse still didn't really laugh but this time she did smile a little giving both of us a few minutes more to settle down.

When it was clear we were finished Nurse Baker simply continued as if nothing had happened. Then she slid the diaper to me and had me stroke it. I did but in doing so it took all the humor out of the moment. Although the moment I touched it I felt the fabric and it caught my attention because it really was silky. I wasn't expecting silky at all.

Nurse Baker saw the surprise in my face and pointed out that modal fabric was also very similar in type to rayon fabric. I looked at her curiously because I had no idea what she was saying. Rayon, she said, was often used as artificial silk or nylon. I could only nod.

“I’ll take your word for that,” I said.

She also said it was made specifically from the fibers of beech trees. I wasn't sure if I'd had heard her right but she repeated it. She seemed very proud of the fact that she knew that.

Oddly she made a point of mentioning it because it was very smooth and who would have thought trees as being so smooth as cloth? Then she flipped the diaper over and what I thought was silk or that rayon, turned out to be white nylon. Lingerie nylon she said. It was the word Lingerie that caught my attention. Lingerie mean women's stuff, like panties, nightgowns and slips.

I wasn't sure I’d heard that part right until she moved that layer within the diaper as if making her point. I had no idea why she was doing that. The white nylon moved over the diaper independently but was part of the diaper.

As she moved it that inside layer shifted over the diaper fabric itself so it was clear I had heard her correctly. Why had they lined the diapers with lingerie nylon. Why would they do that? Clearly it was part of the diaper but why, and Nurse Baker seemed happy about it.

"Seems odd I know, but believe it or not, it's not. In fact Linus this is a very crucial part of your diaper when you’re wearing it. This diaper is in fact made for just your type of problem Linus,” Nurse Baker said.

“Nurse Baker, you’re telling me I’m going to be wearing a diaper lined in panty material and it’s made for people with my kind of problem,” I said and then added, “I’m all ears.”

“Believe it or not Linus, this nylon layer is actually designed to immediately wick away moisture away," Nurse Baker said and then added, "that's what I meant about custom made."

"I’m not sure I follow," I said. I had no idea how wearing panties under a diaper would help me keep dry.

"I know, but the thing is even though the diaper itself collects the moisture and holds it, you still want something to quickly wick away or provide an immediate kind of capillary action for that moisture that appears. Both silk and/or lingerie nylon do that. In this case lingerie nylon only because of course the cost of silk is high."

"So you've lined the diaper in nylon," I said meaning it to come out sarcastic adding, "and lingerie nylon like they use when they make girl's panties is more cost effective?"

"Not just panties Linus. Actually, in this case it would be more analogous to a slip I suppose," Nurse Baker said ignoring my sarcasm completely.

I was too flabbergasted to speak. Wearing a diaper was bad enough. Wearing a diaper someone lined with lingerie nylon so it felt like I was wear panties was really bad. No matter what she said it was going to be like wearing actual panties under a diaper I thought, which of course made me try desperately not to think about it, which made me think of nothing else.

And every moment I sat there the nightgown was becoming wetter. I was becoming keenly aware of wetness as my erection began dripping again. This was becoming more agonizing by the minute. Dresses and diapers! Diapers lined with the same material as women’s panties.

“What,” I asked. Did someone speak? I looked at Nurse Baker, then at mom. It had been mom.

“I did,” my step mother said.

It was my mother that broke my chain of thoughts when she asked about the diapers thickness. I had already thought they were way too thick. Now clearly so did she. I could understand why babies waddled. I could imagine myself trying to walk in that diaper. No, I didn’t want to imagine myself walking in a diaper. I couldn’t imagine laying on top of that much diaper.

I’d drifted into some kind of fantasy again.

It was Nurse Baker who had spoken. She was telling mom and I that the diapers' thickness was because of the hemp. Evidently hemp was not really as absorbent as cotton, as if that mattered. Obviously it did matter to her I thought. I didn’t want to know why that much diaper was going between my legs... it was worth changing the subject.

"The thing is Nurse Baker, If I'm not actually wetting the diapers like someone who really needs to wear diapers why couldn't I simply wear a thinner diaper," I asked letting my sarcasm creep in again.

"Actually Linus there is no reason other than demand I suppose. As far as I know they don't make a thinner specialty diaper in this material," Nurse Baker said.

The issue of "my" diapers being too thick ended right then and there. I looked at my mom and she looked back at me and there was a slight shrug between us both. It was hopeless. I was going to be wearing diapers. I was going to wearing diapers lined in panties and just to make sure I was humiliated enough I'd wear cute flowery dresses over them.

"This is just great," I said out loud. My step mom patted the back of my hand.

Nurse Baker ignored my tone and simply went on to talk about the durability, and softness. I thought she too was being sarcastic till I realized she was really talking about lots of washes. She was saying something about the softness as she gave my step mom a tiny box of hypo allergenic laundry soap. There was enough, she said, for two loads which was seven diapers per load.

"I have a question," my step mother asked.

"Sure," Nurse Baker said.

"I don't see any Velcro or snaps so I'm assuming these pin on," mom asked.

"Actually I'm glad you said something. They do pin on. It actually makes sizing them a little more flexible. Fortunately with his sizes he’s in their TC sizes. These go on with regular diaper pins," Nurse Baker said bending into the bag to come back with a little plastic container of white tipped diaper pins. It looked like it contained two sets.

“TC sizes,” my step mother asked. I cringed knowing whatever the initials meant I wasn’t going to like it.

“Toddler Chubby,” Nurse Bake said and then added, “with his waist size he could fit into a toddlers size 6T. I know your not familiar with diaper sizes but in brands that’s a Pamper’s Cruiser or largest size Swaddlers. The only other one that comes to mind is the Huggies Movers.”

“You’re kidding,” my step mother said.

‘No. Of course he’s bigger, as in taller, so the really important difference is rise. That’s the measurement between his legs to the small of his back to the front of his waist. That’s why I mentioned the Chubbies. That little bit of extra weight added for the baby diapers actually would translate into more inches in that rise,” Nurse Baker said.

“Fascinating,” my step mother said.

“Interesting,” I added in too loud a voice. My step mother caught the hint.

I found the whole conversation completely unnerving. Nurse Baker had no mercy. Mostly because the whole time she’s talking about baby diapers and caring for “my diapers” she's got the diapers on the table and she caressing the damn thing in front of me and my step mom.

She even made pinning them on me sound "cute". It was torture. I was absolutely positively convinced It couldn't get any worse, but did the instant Nurse Baker bent back down into that damn bag again.

"Which brings me to one last thing about the diapers," Nurse Baker said going into her bag and coming up with a jar smiling.

"What's that," I ask before my mother could. I was looking at the jar thinking what’s the harm in that.

"This is going to be the second most important reason for the diapers," Nurse Baker says and adds, this is your corticosteroid cream or Baby Eczema Cream."

"My baby cream," I said sarcastically and like a dummy even repeated it, “you said my Baby Cream?”

"Not Baby Cream. Corticosteroid cream," Nurse Baker emphasized.

"For babies," I said.

"It's used mostly for babies, yes, but only because they suffer most often from the same symptoms as you do. It's really intended to sooth severe dry skin and eczema," Nurse Baker said and then added, “combined with your custom diapers this will work very well."

That was a stab in the gut! That was painful to hear. I wanted to run from the kitchen but my erection was still too pronounced from the diaper discussions and now suddenly even more so. I had no choice but to sit there cursing this whole scene. Now, instead of having something to focus on besides diapers she was holding up a jar of baby cream. Corticosteroid cream my ass I thought and then didn’t want to think even that.

"But trust me Linus this isn't just baby cream," Nurse Baker said and added, "Linus it's corticosteroid cream. This cream is a steroid hormone. It's actually synthesized to duplicate the adrenal cortex and administered to reduce swelling and decrease the body's immune response. This is really another line of defense for you."

"So he does what with that? Rubs it on before his diaper then," his step mother said and then shaking her had added, “I’m asking a dumb question aren't I?”

“No, not really and yes, it goes on before the diaper, but not just on per se! This stuff is very important actually," Nurse Baker said twisting the lid open to expose the white smooth cream and then added, "it's going to be absolutely critical to massage this into every fold, or crease and space around his privates to displace any possible moisture already there. First from showering or bath, then from sweating."

“Massaging it on? You said massaging it in. I don’t want to put too fine a point on this but don’t you mean rubbing in on,” Rose asked. I was also intent on Nurse Baker’s answer to that one. I had nearly fainted with her description of what to do with that cream. Nurse Baker actually said that. That was very important she said. I couldn't believe I was hearing this. I was in agony.

“No, and I’m glad you asked for that clarification. You’ve got to actually massage it in so it’s absorbed into the pours of the skin to replace the moisture,” Nurse Baker said and added, “I know what you’re thinking and I wish there was a better way for all of this to happen but there isn’t. Just remember as you’re massaging it in, you’re helping him.”

I was off in another fantasy. I have no idea where my step mother was. I didn’t even want to make eye contact. I'm in a dress. I'm going to be wearing dresses. Dresses for the next four days.

And diapers... diapers lined in nylon panty. Worse, this women is telling me while I’m laying on top of that panty lined diaper that my step mother is going to slip on a plastic glove grab a glob of cream and massage that into and around my privates. All that before pinning me into that diaper.

Excuse me Nurse Baker, but how do you think that's going to go? HELLO!

I was going to lose it right then and there. I could feel my penis throbbing and dripping onto my nightgown. Step mother or not she was a woman and all I could see suddenly were those painted fingernails in those clear plastic gloves dipping into that cream. I had to say something to change the subject to anything else?

"Why is that cream so important," I asked trying to keep my voice even, but not doing so well. I actually had to get out of there. This had to end. I just needed a moment but now I wasn’t even sure I could stand without them knowing.

"It's got to be done and like I said that's the second use for the diaper. The cream is to keep you free of moisture and the diaper is to keep the cream from being rubbed off," Nurse Baker said.

By this time I wasn't even hearing her. All I could imagine was me laying over my diaper and my step mother's fingers with those red nails gently massaging that cream into "my" folds. I could actually feel those so called "folds" being slowly caressed and fondled.

I could feel my face getting warmer. I was in torment and my erection was now throbbing to a climax. All I had to do was touch it or move the nightgown. Thank the stars my step mother noticed my discomfort.

"Maybe I could read the instructions later," his step mother said looking at me. She could clearly see the anguish on my face.

"As long as you understand the importance of covering all of his genitals," Nurse Baker said closing the lid.

"I do," my step mother said and added, "I'll read the paper very carefully.

Thankfully the nurse put the lid back on the jar and sat it down and went back into the bag. I have never been so relived to see something end as that conversation. I actually thought the most embarrassing part of his day was over. I began doing my math homework in my head. It was over. But I'd thought that before.

I'd never been that close to an orgasm without touching myself - ever.

Dresses, nylon lined diapers and baby cream. Please God, I prayed, make it end. Only it didn't as Nurse Baker came up from the bag with what I thought was an actual pair of panties. I was so shocked I didn’t realize they weren’t panties for a minute or two till I looked harder. It was then that I realized I must be looking at a large pair of shiny baby pants.

This was insane. Baby pants? Of course. If I’m going to be wearing diapers why not baby pants I mused and while I was thinking that I also realized they didn’t look like ordinary baby pants. Which considering how my luck was running so far made perfectly good since.

These baby pants actually looked like panties. Seriously, they looked almost the same as the panties my step mother wore when she folded hers out of the laundry. It was some kind of conspiracy. I actually thought they were honest to goodness girl's panties at first because they shimmered like silk. They had that same shimmer as that nylon layer over the diaper. Literally.

At least these finally got an honest to goodness sympathetic look from Nurse Baker which actually scared me a little. After all the things she had sprung on me, for her to now be sympathetic meant it really had to be bad. I was getting ready to faint dead away.

"I know what you're thinking but these are really not panties Linus! These are - plastic like - lined diaper covers, and this silky layer is actually what they call a whisper layer. These are in reality called whisper pants," Nurse Baker said.

“Whisper pants,” I asked.

“Believe it or not when you're trying to cover up the fact that you're wearing diapers and plastic pants these are going to be the best thing you can wear," Nurse Baker said running the palm of her hand over the panty part.

I was watching and realized that I was watching. It was too late because she saw that I was watching.

Nurse Baker leaned towards me and again started rubbing the silky layer over the plastic layer and said: "Here, listen.... quiet isn't it? That nylon layer hides the crinkling sounds the baby pants would be making over the diaper."

She caressed the plastic panty part inside sliding the silky layer over the plastic layer more and it did soften the sound somewhat. What I was looking at she said as she caressed the two layers was the "whisper layer or sliding layer" and the waterproof layer. It didn't matter to me. because quiet or not, it was pretty obvious those baby pants, combined that way were meant for girls and she wasn't going to tell me otherwise.

I looked at mom and she gave me an awkward sort of grin. She knew what I knew. I knew those panty clad baby pants were never meant of a boy. You could rationalize them all you wanted but it wouldn’t matter because those were panties on top of those baby pants. Period. All they needed was a little lace!

"I know what you're thinking! Rumba panties! Right? That these are for girls because of the nylon layer, but they're not. Seriously, that nylon keeps the waterproof pants from moving around under regular pants. It also keeps the plastic pants pats from being pulled down or off when you move around in bed at night," Nurse Baker said.

“Why would I need those? I’m only wearing those diapers to bed? Right,” I said.

That’s true, but that’s the beauty of these Whisper pants. They allow you to glide over the sheets in bed as well,” Nurse Baker said, I tried not thinking about me moving around in bed at night. Not me in a diaper under those nylon covered baby pants.

"Think about this a different way Linus... the panty slides like a slip over the waterproof pants," Nurse Baker said before adding, "which you wouldn't know or appreciate, but you will benifit from for the same reason."

She actually pinched that panty part to pull it away from the baby pant part to show how much panty there was as if to reassure both me and my step mom, which it didn't. To me it was like looking at a pair of baby girl's rumba panties without the ruffles. I didn't even look at my step mother this time to see what she was thinking. I already knew she saw rumba panties. Every mother would see rumba panties.

Nurse Baker said the waterproof pants, (thankfully she never called them baby pants at least) were made of polyurethane laminate layers or PUL. PUL was the technical short name as if that would make me feel better, which it didn't. They still looked like rumba panties without the ruffles. PUL fabrics, she said, was a real plus for allergy sufferers. It made me very happy - Not!

She was - Happy.

She even turned the panties inside out a little to show me the shimmering plastic noting as she did so that "my new diaper covers (she did say that) were made using some kind of thermal process and not a chemical process. I had no idea what that meant till she explained that there would be no trace amounts of solvents to bother me or trigger an allergic reaction. How wonderful was that I think I whispered.

It did seem to matter to her as she started showing my step mom the textures of both fabrics. I don't why my step mom was interested in the panty part since she wore panties and had to already know about them intimately Mom got the bag that had the second pair of panties in it so I had two. There was a paper for more diapers and those whisper pants if we wanted to buy them. Not likely I decided.

She even handed my step mom the panties to hold them as she dug out a toxicology report on the PUL panties that now went with all the other papers into my folder. How fantastic I mused and almost screamed "who the hell cares!"

My step mom now had the panties in her hand, and the report. Meanwhile the nurse went back into the bag. Was it ever going to end. She came back out with a new pillow case and mattress cover in packages. There was even a new polyester thermal blanket in white. That PUL fabric was also used for both and each would zip closed.

Those items thank God were the last two items she pulled from the bag because she finally zipped the nearly empty bag closed. I don't think I've even been more relieved than I was just then. The table looked like we had a baby girl living there. I tried ignoring it all.

After that she began pulling printouts from her briefcase to put into a folder. Most of those printouts were on what to do about furniture in the house, carpets, towels, curtains and my old clothing. There was a PUL changing pad for my bed I thought that was another pillow case but wasn't which was "for when I was diapered", and that PUL cover for the coach. My bedding was going to be changed and my step mother laughed at the notion of me sleeping on satin or polyester sheets. I snickered lamely over that part just to humor my mother but by then I was emotionally exhausted.

Nurse Baker opened her appointment book and said they would also be delivering a High efficiency particulate air exchanger or HEPA filter for my room and another whole house for the living room. Both were due sometime later today. They were also going to shampoo the carpets later today as well. Finally the nurse handed my step mom a list of clothing manufacturers that made shirts and pants out of "certified" chemical free polyesters.

I was sitting there in my snap closed polyester hospital gown with no underwear on so clothes were going to be important I said laughing. I didn't tell either of them that the back of the gown I was wearing was nearly wet. Soaked actually from all the discussions they'd been having at my expense because the last thing I wanted to explain was why?. Truth was I wasn't sure why I'd been turned on by some of it but I was.

Since my "gown" snapped at the back it was more like a dress but I ignored that for now. It was a pastel yellow but luckily my step mom had driven into the garage after picking me up in front of the hospital right from the wheel chair ride to the door so I didn't have much outside exposure. So far none of our neighbors or my friends had seen me. I hadn't thought about the near term.

Then nurse Baker was looking at my gown, then at mom and finally she cleared her throat and said there was one final subject that she touched on earlier regarding what she called that lingering contact dermatitis from my original outbreak. It was a tiny bit more serious than just the waist band because it really involved the whole body with a condition very similar to Psoriasis.

I gave her a questioning look and she said it was very much like an autoimmune disease. What was really at issue she said is it would be lingering until my medications and creams kicked in. Again, that overall process would take anywhere from three to four weeks. Until then I would be subject to that psoriasis like condition and it was no joke because a relapse could be worse than the original condition. That actually made me shudder again.

When she was sure I got it and I believed it she dropped the other shoes and said that even the approved clothing were off limits during that three to four week time period. When I asked what I was suppose to do till then she said I really should restrict himself to "open" clothing.

"What does open clothing mean," I asked before mom could. She had started to open her mouth but I'd got there first.

"Open clothing means loose fitting garments, and for now I should only wear undergarments certified manufactured in Japan," Nurse Baker said and adding that, " it was very important that your lingerie come from Japan for now. That seemed odd until she explained. Clothing from Japan will be a bit more expensive, but Japanese standards for acceptable levels for formaldehyde resins used in lingerie are the lowest in the world."

"You said lingerie," I said.

"It's the label thing again. If you buy lingerie by Japanese standards and use that approved list. There is no need to worry about the content because it's going to be 100% nylon," Nurse Baker said.

I was starting to get that uneasy feeling again. Nurse Baker was pretty straight forward when she talked but sometimes she talked right over your head and this was one of those times. So I was just getting it. She said loose fitting, then undergarments, then lingerie... Wait a second I suddenly got it! She was talking about girl's clothes!

"Are you talking about underclothes meant for girls," I asked point blank

"Yes," Nurse Baker said in a tone that suggested I should have known that already, "I’m sorry, I thought you understood that. So what's your point?"

I wanted to know why, but she thought I was concerned about the formaldehyde and not that I’d be wearing girl’s lingerie.

She explain that all lingerie manufacturers used formaldehyde resins in their manufacturing processes which was often called "sizing" in America. Sizing was part of a glutinous material used to fill pores in surfaces to stiffen fabrics. She also recommended my step mother talk about that as well since she knew about new lingerie. Buying lingerie from Japanese manufacturers meant better quality lingerie and much less of that "sizing".

With that said the nurse pretty much ended her visit, shook my hand, excused herself, but asked my step mom to walk her to her car leaving me sitting in the kitchen. My step mother meanwhile suggested I go take the medicated soap and one of the new "gowns" and shower.

MY LINGERIE

Nurse Baker, on the way out of the kitchen suggested I use one of the diapers to dry with till mom could get new towels. I grabbed a diaper but waited till both women went out the door. I might have protested were it not for the condition of the gown at the back I was sitting on and with mom walking out with Nurse Baker I had my chance.

Truth is I didn't leave that second as they reached Nurse Bakers' car. I actually took up the pair of baby pants and was even more convinced, caressing the silky panties that I was looking at rumba panties without the ruffles. I caressed them a little trying to imagine myself wearing them over the diaper, then I patted the diaper. I caressed the diaper imagining my step mom rubbing that baby cream over me and that's when I made a bee line for the bathroom.

That, I mused, was the weird part as I headed to the bathroom. There was this odd fantasy of me in those diapers that was both horrifying and fascinating. I kept wondering why? I mean if I was so horrified over being diapered like a baby and put into rumba panties like a girl baby then why did I have such a hard on? I locked the door, turned the water on, lifted my gown off, grabbed the soap and got it wet enough to lather and sat on the toilet seat.

I was sitting there in the bathroom fantasizing over it and it was working as the water in the shower warmed. It was a mystery but there I was slowly stroking myself imagining my diaper coming up between my legs and my step mother loomed over me. That fantasizing over being diapered and put into those rumba panties took all of about a minute to bring me to climax. I never really got past me being pinned into a diaper before I exploded into a wad of toilet paper.

I climbed into the shower, scrubbed with the soap, dried with the diaper and slipped into my new shift. I had just put on my first ever dress and was just walking back into the kitchen when my step mother turned from reading one of the papers. I asked her what they talked about? She tried not smiling but the edges showed it wasn’t really working.

My step mom told me to have breakfast, and do not try not touching any of my old clothes no matter what. I was also to not use the new PUL cover to sit on the couch until the cleaning crew came in later that day to shampoo everything. Mom said she needed to go to the store ASAP and would be back soon. She looked at the clock and said we had about three hours before the carpet cleaners came.

I did ask again about what the nurse said but mom was quiet about that promising that discussion when she returned. When I asked where she was going she said she was going to go shopping for some "basics" from the "list" the nurse gave her so I could finish getting dressed. She didn't say anything about my new shift. She didn’t have to.

I shrugged, to be honest I was happy to have the conversation ended more than anything else. I ate, watched television in the kitchen and waited. I was trying not to think about the diaper and baby pants sitting on the kitchen table which of course made me think of nothing else. My step mom was gone an hour. I had several tissue too keep me and my new "dress" dry when I “thought” too much about “things”.

When my step mom returned I was in room playing games at my desk on my computer. I told her I had not touched anything in my closet or my bed. She invited me back into the kitchen to "talk". That in itself made me nervous but I wasn't stupid. Even worse, the bags she had carried in were sitting on the floor on the opposite side of the table where she sat. It was all out of sight making me even more suspicious. I asked her why she was being so mysterious.

My step mom hesitated and it was that hesitation that put it all together for me and convinced me I knew I was right. I was already wearing an "open" garment - a dress, and I had three more gowns so it didn't take a whiz kid to figure out what my "alternative" undergarments or lingerie were more or less one and the same.

I decided to shorten the conversation and make it easier on both of us.

"So I'm guessing you’re hiding that bag because I'm looking at a bunch of silky nylon girl's clothes," I said.

"Now how did you know that," my step mom asked and then added, "and just so you know, I got some hypoallergenic soap for your showers after you finish with that medicated stuff."

"How did I know it was girl's clothes? Duh," I said and added, "Oh, and thanks for the soap and how did I know about the girl clothes?"

I told her it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. I mean when you think about it, with the exception of the shifts or dresses, almost everything a girl wears under her regular clothes is silky and mostly nylon. I also said I got a hint of it when Nurse Baker pulled her out of the house "to talk". Lastly I was reminded of those "things" when I thought about those baby pants having that nylon panty over them like they were rumba pants.

My step mom nodded and said "yes". She said that girl's panties were obviously made of nylon, but the other issue is having things to wear other than panties. I needed the so called outer wear or those "dresses". Mom fished in the bag and came out with a lemon yellow loose-fitting dress hanging straight from the shoulders without a waist.

"What is that," I asked while already knowing the answer.

"It's a silk teddy with soft lace wide straps to wear under your shifts. Gives you a since of wearing something that at least feels like underpants. I got it a size bigger so you can, you know, move it aside to go potty. At least for number one," my step mom said.

It was no where near something close to a boy’s underpants. Lacy shoulder straps, satiny top that ended in attached panties. Granted there was no elastic but it was a thousand miles from a boy’s pair of underwear.

“It’s about as basic as you can get. Normally it goes under a blouse or shirt. I thought you could wear this with your shifts for the next few days, at least till you can wear panties... I mean you know, underwear," mom said.

"You're expecting me to wear that," I asked and added, "besides the frills mom, it's pink!"

"I know, lingerie is not meant to be masculine and never pink not something like this but it’s the best I could find. They didn’t even have white. Just red and black. Both way too sexy and the only other colors. Look, there is no alternative to panties for now,” mom said.

"Panties," I asked.

"I did get some bubble panties. Went to a specialty shop Nurse Baker recommended. That Japanese place she talked about. They actually have wide lace elastic even softened with nylon sheer for both the waist and leg openings. I was impressed. Not only that but tap pants which are sort of like gym shorts but in lingerie nylon," mom said and added, "for later we can go to a regular panty... pants.

Those bubble panties looked like round balls with leg openings, but at least in white. The tap panties were in a kind of shimmering polyester peach. The regular panties followed and those too were white nylon brief style in a package of seven in a girl's size five six.

I kind of had to laugh at the notion that regular meant panties now instead of shorts. Regular now meant I was now wearing girl’s panties to replace my Jockey shots. I was actually glad I'd spent time "taking care of things" in the bathroom. The socks were polyester and almost as silky, and white pull ups and those too I took to replace the cotton socks I use to wear.

"So these panties that fit around the waist are a no for now," I asked.

"That’s right. You can't wear those for a few days. The nurse said when you do start to use the cream at least for the next three days and things look like they are going to be okay we can go with the wide leg panties non binding waist bands,” Mom said.

“That’s the tap pants,” I said.

“Exactly,” Mom said and added, “after that and if the rash does return we'll stay with the tap panties with no leg elastic. However and if those don't work then back to the teddy and slips alone and no panties. Same with the diapers. We can pin those on loose and you can wear the waterproof pants high above the waist. we can even get an adult nylon onesie if needed and not pin you into the diapers. Still lots of options," mom said.

"Sorry I asked." I said smiling lamely.

I then said I could wear those socks with my tennis shoes, but she said no on the tennis shoes “cotton”, and produced a pair of girl's flats in white promising I didn't have to wear them outside. They were just for around the house for now and were all soft leather with no cotton content. Again, my tennis shoes had cotton, as did my socks.

That's when I began wondering over my calm. I was looking at those shoes, dresses and lingerie and it was like looking at regular school clothes. I was totally indifferent. What had happened to me I wondered Diapers and plastic panties with nylon panties covering those and now all this girl stuff. Man had things changed and yet I was as calm as a cucumber. What was up with that?

"All because of allergies," I mumbled.

"I know honey it’s pretty wild isn’t it," mom said and added, "here, go get into your teddy. At least it’s another layer under your dress.. I mean shift."

My step mom got up, hugged me and then spent the next few minutes taking some of the same stuff out of the shopping bag. I told her not to get her hopes up about me getting my hair and nails done - ever!

She opened the packages and I grabbed the teddy and new shoes and headed for the bathroom.

"I'm going to take another shower," I yelled from the bathroom door.

"Wait," my step mother said before adding, "I've got you some new towels and wash cloths - their hemp, and mixed powder for after your showers. Nurse Baker recommended it."

"Of course she did," I mumbled.

GIRL TIME, FIRST TIME

"Baby powder or talcum is the key Nurse Baker said to keeping moisture from accumulating in the bodies cavities and pores," mom said and added, "be generous. It's hand mixed. I used lavender smelling oil which is the base smell for baby powder... which come to think of it isn't what you want to hear is it?"

"I'll live," I said talking the container she handed me.

My step mom hand mixed the powder at the bath store. My step mother had also been thoughtful enough to buy a plastic powder puff container with a large fluffy powder puff to use with it, and I did. My step mom had mixed lavender essential oil to gave a hint of baby powder to the talcum powder.

I was using the large powder puff while looking at my new lingerie neatly folded on the counter. My pink step in teddy was first after powdering myself and that was followed by my pastel yellow silk like tunic and there I was about as close to dressing as a girl as a boy dared. I was wondering over the girlishness this new handicap had introduced.

I smiled then and decided to throw caution to the wind and dust my new shoes. I couldn't help it as I dusted myself a little more over my thighs before letting the shift fall to just above my knees. I was being feminized and later I'd be babied I mumbled. I was trying to be brave and decided I didn't really need to be. At least not while I was alone.

When I put the toilet seat down for my silky socks and bent to put the first sock on I sat back up again still holding the sock. I tried again and again sat up. I literally couldn't bend because when I did it slid the silken teddy and dress over my erection. I finally gave up, lifted the tunic, slid the teddy aside, grabbed some toilet tissue and masturbated. It was literally the only way I could dress. I vowed next time to put my socks on first. Then I changed my mind deciding I’d just masturbate before I’d dress.

I was also wondering how many boys had that same reaction to "their lingerie" the way I did? Actually I began wondering how many would not react? Then I laughed and wondered how many spent any given morning putting themselves into these kinds of things before wiggling after a morning shower?

With the silken shift on I was covered from neck to knee in satiny nylon and walked to my bedroom in my new flats feeling a lot less disadvantaged over the allergies than I had just a few hours ago. Even more so seeing the folded diapers and faux rumba panties on my dresser.

My step mom was zipping the cover on my stripped mattress when I came in and she stopped. She took a moment to look, then smiled at me.

"Don't say it," I said.

Luckily I was still fortified by my moments in the bathroom earlier that morning. At the moment I didn't worry about exposure and smiled back with a terrible blush on my cheeks at my step mother who was looking at the length of my new dress.

"Feels a bit odd doesn't it," My step mom asked.

"Very odd," I said and then added, "I feel like I've raided your clothes."

"Would it upset you if I said you looked really nice," my step mom asked.

"Not really," I said and then asked, "does that sound funny? Although to be honest, it might be a little awkward going outside dressed like this?"

"I know, we've got to work on that," my step mom noted as she came over and ran her hand through my hair and added, “we’ve really got to do something about this and I know you hate makeup but a little blush and lip gloss would do wonders.”

"Don't even think about it," I said.

She kissed my cheek and turned back to the bed things. My step mom was bagging my old blankets, pillow cases and spread for Good Will Industries while I opened my new sheets. I thought the sheets were something similar to what I'd had till I noticed that shimmer again. That's when I looked at my step mom for an answer just as I read the label.

"Satin polyester," my step mother said smiling before she added, "I spent a little more."

The white satin felt luxurious. I had a bottom fitted sheet and a flat top sheet in white. Over those I got a soft white polyester fleece blanket that could have easily passed for a giant's version of a baby blanket because of the wide white edging of polyester satin.

She said she didn't find a suitable spread without cotton, but would keep looking. I honestly didn't care and hugged her for the thought and ignored the changing pad she slipped under the bed. She had gotten two giant white tipped diaper pins to keep the giant blanket from sliding off the bed. I suddenly worried that my friends might come by. Then worried that they hadn't.

"Do you think they know I'm home," I asked.

"Your friends? Yes, I think they do," my step mom said.

"Oh God, what if they come over," I said.

"We take it one step at a time," my step mom said.

"Look at me! Should I tell them not to come over," I asked and then added, "they're going to want to know why?"

"I know," my step mom said and then added, "you know it's going to be hard going out for while as well."

"Because of this," I asked stating the obvious.

"No, because of the corticosteroids." mom said and then added, "the Sun! UV rays! You'll also have to wear a hat or perhaps a bonnet and sun glasses."

"I'm not going out like this," I said.

"Think we can have them over to explain this," my step mother said.

"I'm not having them over with me dressed like this? Mom, I'm dressed like a girl, right down to the teddy. You can see the outline of it! I don't think they're going to get it," I said and then added, "no let me rephrase that, I know they're not going to get it."

"Let me ask you this? Of those you hang with, who would most likely understand," my step mom asked.

"That's a tough one? Maybe Cindy, and that's a huge maybe," I said.

"Tell you what then. Why not call her and invite her over and see how she takes it," my step mom said

"Like this? Seriously mom, you're nuts. There is no way I'm going to do that," I said looking a little shocked.

"Better sooner rather than later," my step mom said.

"No. Not going to happen. I can't do this. Not like this," I said.

"You can," my step mom said.

"I can't," I said.

"She's one of your best friends," mom said.

"And that was because I wasn't wearing the same things she wears," I said.

"She will understand," mom said and added, "trust me, I know."

"Then you call her," I asked and added, "maybe explain why I'm dressed they way I am or something like that?"

"I can do that," my step mother said and added, "tell you what, "I'll call all of your friends and tell them you're home, that you're resting over the next couple of days and you'll call them later when you can have company. Then after the carpet and filter people come I'll call Cindy and invite her over for our chat. You can wait in your room. How's that?"

“Thank you," I said just as the door bell rang. I darted for mom's bathroom and locked the door. It was the carpet cleaners. While they were here the filter guy came and showed mom how to set up the two filters.

It took the carpet guys two hours to clean the carpet, couch and love seat. I had moved from mom’s bathroom to my bedroom after the carpet guys cleaned there first. When they left mom talked with my four friends but stayed on the phone with Cindy.

"So there I was sitting on my bed fidgeting within my new yellow tunic that was hiding a teddy and scared to death. There was no getting around it, I was dressed like a girl. Dress, underpinnings, shoes and even the smell of lavender hovering around me. With mom in the kitchen talking to one of my friends trying to explain why. This was a really bad idea.

How odd that conversation must be I thought. Either Cindy was going to run from the house screaming or laughing but I was positive she wasn't going to come though that door. Doubtful she'd come in and say "hey dude".

Then I jumped.

There was a single knock on the door.

"Hey," Cindy said opening the door slowly and poking her head in and added, "you're not going to run off screaming or anything are you?"

"That's funny, I was thinking that's what you'd do," I said.

"I'm suppose to come in and not faint over what you're wearing," Cindy said taking a step into the door and then when she was in far enough closed it as she added, "not bad? I wasn't sure what to expect, but this isn't so bad. So, you're mom say's you've got to be more like a girl for a few weeks, is that right?"

"Pretty much," I said but then added, "but not all the way."

"I heard that to. Man do you have a lot to learn," Cindy said.

"How's that," I asked.

"Little stuff," Cindy said and then added, "could really use some helpful hints if you don't mind me saying so."

"I don't," I said and then puzzled over what she said asked, "wait? like what?"

'Like you don’t wear knee highs with a shift. Not with flats. Those look better with a short skirt or shorts. Another thing, when was the last time you saw my legs that harry," Cindy said and then added, "and your wearing a tunic Linus.”

“Okay, so dump the socks. Shave the lags which isn’t going to happen and what’s wrong with wearing a tunic,” I asked.

“First of all you really do need to shave your legs. It actually makes it look gross. Much better to try and make yourself presentable than not,” Cindy said and then added. “look, it’s the perception Linus. First thing people are going to see is you if you shave them or your legs if you don’t. It’s that simple.

“And the issue with the tunic,” I asked.

“Same thing,” Cindy said.

“No sleeves, so if I ask you to raise your arms am I going to see smooth or a hint of a Neanderthal? And please, if the answer is Neanderthal, don't raise your arms. Thank you very much."

"So none of this scares you," I asked.

"Yes it scares me," Cindy said and then added, "first of all look at the way you're sitting. If I was sitting across from you I would have swallowed my gum already." Secondly, You haven't don't anything with your hair and that face is to die for, and I don’t mean too cute to die for, I mean like kill me now, to die for."

"That's it, that's your complaint," I said and added, "I'm not girly enough?"

“I’m not wearing makeup,” I said.

“I’m not telling you to become a drag queen silly. I’m just saying you could soften things up a little. You could do a lot without doing a lot,” Cindy said.

“So I’m not there yet,” I asked.

"Absolutely not. You're not even a really bad example yet. And like I said before, who wears knee high socks with flats and a shift? You're like someone who is writing a book on what not to do when dressing as a girl," Cindy said and then added, "you're more like a really bad apocalyptical doomsday movie where this plague attacks only boys and turns them into these ghoulish girl want-to-be's zombies."

"What," I said.

"That's what I'm talking about, it’s a plaque and they go around just grabbing girl’s clothes and putting on stuff and dresses and they ravage the countryside scaring local girls by being all hairy and not wearing makeup. Now that's scary," Cindy said.

"Is that it? I'm a zombie girl want to be" I asked and added, "anything else?

"Yes," Cindy said and added, "if this was Halloween I'd smear lipstick all over your face. It would make more sense then. That would really scare the kids."

"Are you done," I asked.

"Let me think? Yes, pretty much," Cindy said.

"You know this is only for a few weeks," I said

"So? There is no law that says you can't be pretty? What's up with this? Seriously, I mean if you can wear the lingerie, nice shoes put on a pretty dress, why not take a couple of extra steps,” Cindy said.

“Because I have to wear these things,” I said.

“So? That doesn’t mean you can't take a little extra time to add a little makeup, shave your legs, shave under the arms and present yourself better," Cindy said and then added, "you know what pretty look likes, right? I mean you might not believe it, but it would make you feel a whole lot better!"

"How would me trying to look pretty like a girl make me feel better," I asked.

"Can't tell you, but I can show you," Cindy said and then added, "fairly easily actually!"

"Okay then show me," I said.

"Get one of your mom's razors and go shave your legs and under your arms. Use lots of soap" Cindy said and then added, "then one of your own shaving razors and do your face. Try and shave really close without cutting yourself. Shave with a new razor. Oh, and I mean this, don't use the same razor you use for your legs, and rinse after each stroke. okay?"

"Okay," I said.

"I’m going to go home really quick and meet you right back here," Cindy said.

"Here in my room," I said in a panic.

"I'm not going to poke around if that's what's got you worried," Cindy said.

"Okay," I said.

"But when you shower, don’t dress. Just powder and come back without your dress but in your lingerie," Cindy said.

"Wait? What," I said.

"Why am I not wearing the dress back," I asked.

"I'm going to help you with your makeup first," Cindy said and added, "and I already know what's down there, so go do your thing and come back okay?"

"Fine," I said.

I left the dress on my bed and went for the shower red faced. Thankfully the teddy was a slightly larger size and mom had hidden the diaper, baby pants and changing pad in the drawer. When I left for the bathroom I prayed Cindy didn't explore. I also didn't hear any snickers when I walked out of the room.

I came back from the shower very self conscious, dressed only in my teddy which thankfully draped me loosely, because I was just as Cindy had requested. I'd been careful. My step mother was a little perplexed when I passed her in the hall telling her I need to shave my legs and underarms.

“What,” she had asked when I told her I needed to shave my legs. She only nodded when I told her Cindy had said so. Mom had said yes cautiously when I asked if I could use one of her razors. The look on her face was priceless but I also reminded her that it was partly her fault for inviting her over.

Cindy was sitting at my desk when I came back in. I stood in front of her and turned slowly, hoping it was my legs she looked at, and she nodded her approval. I'd done a good job. I’d done a “not too bad a job under my arms”, and my face was “awesome” since I rarely shaved anyway. Then Cindy turned back at the bed and the subject changed.

"Before we start, are those real satin sheets," Cindy asked.

"Yes," I said.

"Man, even I don't have satin sheets," Cindy said shaking her head before she added, "anyway... wait there for a second!"

I stood there very self consciously as she sat on the bed and took up her large purse. Within she removed a bag of makeup..

“First of all we don't share makeup so you get to keep this stuff," Cindy said and then added, “lipstick is okay, blush in an emergency but stuff that comes near the eyes is a big NO!”

"So are we sharing your stuff or not then," I asked.

"No, this is all new. When your mom called, I grabbed what I had still new and picked up a couple of things on my way over so you owe me," Cindy said and added, “when you’re ready to go out we can shop for the stuff you still need.”

"You've got new stuff," I asked a little surprised.

"Are you kidding," Cindy said and then added, "there is no girl worth her salt that isn't prepared with enough makeup for the apocalypse. It could be years before civilization returns."

"I'm not sure I want to take this that far," I said.

"You do,” Cindy said.

“I do,” I added.

“Look, Linus, you’ve been dealt a hand you had no control over. You've got to be like a girl and there is not much you can do about it. Right? Right! So why not take this as... how do I put this? As far as you can," Cindy said and then added, "at the very least, when this is over you'll be the best boyfriend a girl could ever hope to have.”

“Now how does becoming a girl turn into the best boyfriend ever,” I asked confused.

“Are you kidding,” Cindy said looking at me and laughing as she added, “do you know how many girls would love to have their boy friends understand about this stuff? Trust me, you’ll be worth your weight in gold. Just being about to say the word panty without gagging will be something.”

“Okay,” I said.

“Say it,” she added.

“Say what,” I asked.

“Panty,” Cindy said.

“Panty,” I said.

“See that. A week ago you would have choked on the word,” Cindy said and added, “now it roles off your tongue like a girl.”

“That hurt,” I said.

“Hey, first of all, being called a girl is not a bad thing,” Cindy said and added, “or shouldn’t be. Half the population is made up of girls.”

"Fair enough but I’m pretty far from being a girl" I said.

“We’ll get you closer,” Cindy said.

I nodded my understanding of that remark. No doubt of that I mused. I was already looking at the tubes and containers of color and was curious. I got excited again but thankfully I'd taken care of things in the shower once more. If nothing else, my personal list of reasons for masturbating besides lingerie and diapers now included shaving under my arms, legs and makeup sessions with Cindy.

"What's so funny," Cindy asked.

"Just thinking," I said.

"Don't smile or you'll get wrinkles," Cindy said.

"Yes ma'am," I said.

She had me sit on the edge of my bed and opened a tube that she dabbed on my chin a little before adding, "this a concealer. It does exactly as the name says. On a girl it's good for acne and slight blemishes. For a guy it's perfect to hide your beards' shadow."

She took out another circular container of tan liquid, turned my arm over, and dabbed a little on the inside of my arm shrugging before adding it to my face. She started at my forehead going across, came down my nose, then cheeks and began smoothing it over everything.

"Why'd you do that," I asked.

"With the arm? You dab the inside of your arm because it's the part of your body that gets the lest sunlight. That way, should you go sleeveless your foundation always matches your face," Cindy said.

"So this is foundation," I asked and added, “all named for pretty much what they are.”

“Exactly. Concealer conceals. Foundation is the base and this stuff is your blush which goes where you blush,” Cindy added as she opened a plastic tub of pink powder to either cheek.

With that done she took a little padded applicator rubbed it over another powder of dark purple and did my eye lids. She followed that with a pencil she used to draw a line along the lid. I was starting to feel so odd. Her sweet breath came as she did each item was intoxicating.

Then she pumped the brush in and out of a new tube of mascara. Cindy said it wasn't good to share the mascara at all as she pushed the brush into the tube one last time before lifting my lashes with it.

She drew a line with a bright pink pencil outlining my lips and that’s when I felt the most girlish. I don’t know why that caused the most sensations but it did and it only got better when she used a tube of pink lipstick. It was just a shade darker that she blotted before she added, "done, but don't look yet until you've put your dress back on!"

"It's not a dress, it's a tunic," I said.

"It's a shift," Cindy said and then added, "and a shift is a tunic is a skirt is a dress is all girl clothes so don't get so defensives and just get comfortable with it all."

I gathered the shift and brought it over and let it fall down over my teddy then stood. I fussed with it and then she fussed a little.

“And don’t scratch. Dab with a finger or you’ll smear your makeup,” Cindy said.

“Dab,” I said.

"Dab. Wait, where's your hair brush," Cindy said.

"On the dresser," I said.

"Let's do that first," She said moving for the brush. She fussed with the hair for a time and then leaned back till she smiled as she added, "good."

“Good,” I asked.

"Good. Now go look and tell me that wasn't worth the effort," Cindy said.

I turned and moved to the mirror attached to the door and gapped open mouth. Honestly, I was expecting a sissy kind of look. You know, a guy trying to look like a girl kind of look. That’s not what I saw. What I saw was a girl. Not a pageant winner obviously. Maybe not even a head turner, but a fairly passable girl and that blew me away.

"Nice isn't it," Cindy said and then added, "she goes with the dress now doesn't she."

"She does," I said and then shook my head and laughed and added, "what am I saying? That's me! I mean I do go with the dress. But it didn't change my sex."

"No, it didn't," Cindy said and then added, "Just made you much more pleasant to look at, but we really should do something with the hair. Meanwhile, go show your step mom."

"What's she going to say," I said still looking in the mirror.

"Same thing I said," Cindy said and then added, "nice. And we really should do something with your hair."

Mom was in the kitchen fusing at the counter. When I came in Cindy was following. Mom turned and froze. She moved to the kitchen table and sat. She just sat there looking.

"Say something," I said.

"No,” my step mother said.

No? Why not,” I asked.

“Because If I tell you the truth you'll get mad," my step mother said looking at me before adding, "or you can promise not to?"

"I promise," I said.

"You look adorable," my step mother said and then added, "I mean it. You really do."

"Which is not what I'm suppose to look like," I said.

"Why," both women said almost at the same time. One was in front, the other behind me. It was like stereo.

"I don't know," I said.

“Honey, it looks like you got handed a raw deal that you just tried to make the best of,” mom said.

"Think of it this way Linus: you can be a gender bender or cross dresser, or you can be transgendered or transsexual. People know about all of those," Cindy said and then added, "or you can just be a guy with a severe allergy who has been told he's got to wear mostly girl clothes for a short time and has decided to wear makeup to look pretty because your stuck now wearing girl clothes."

"How about just a guy wearing makeup because I'm stuck wearing girl clothes," I said.

"And there you have it," Cindy said.

"And now we know what you are," my step mother said and added, "and how to explain it."

"Why do I feel like I've been set up," I said.

"I'm going to go with.... because you were," Cindy said and then added, "now can we please do something with your hair?"

"Yes," I said.

"Now why don't we invite your friends over for hot dogs, chips and sodas," my step mom asked.

"Okay," I said grabbing the phone. Cindy took hers as mom had me sit to brush my hair again.

Rick, Mike and Sally were sitting in front of Sally's house and each said okay. All three arrived at the same time since they'd been at Sally's. My step mom had put the hot dogs on when it was confirmed the kids were coming over. Cindy had kept combing and fluffing my hair.

That had been the final piece of the puzzle until Cindy sat at the kitchen table and painted his nails with a pale lemon polish. I’d said no right up to when Cindy started shaking the bottle of nail polish. All three kids were now sitting there with the same look on their face as my step mother had just an hour ago when I walked in with my makeup on.

"You know my mom said the nurse told her you couldn't wear boy clothes at all, just girl clothes," Sally said and added, "and only dresses."

"What," I said and added, "who told you that?"

"My mom knows Nurse Baker at the hospital.

"So you already knew," I said and added, "and Nurse Baker said only dresses?"

"Sort of," Sally said.

"So is this like forever," Rick asked looking at me oddly.

"You really look like a girl," Mark said and added, "but I mean that in a nice way."

"Ditto dude," Rick said and then laughed as he added, "it's dude right? I"m mean it's just girl stuff. You didn't get snipped or anything?"

"Just allergies," I said.

"Pretty cool," Rick said.

"You really look cute," Sally said.

"I did his makeup," Cindy said laying claim to her work and his nails just now.

"He really looks good," Rick said and added as everyone looked at him, "wait, that's not a gay thing or anything. I mean, I said it as if he was a girl kind of looks good. So how long does this last?"

"Not sure," I said and then added as kind of a tease, "doctor said I might like it and if that's the case he said I could keep wearing this stuff and he could do the snip thing."

"Seriously," Mark asked.

"You're such a Dufus," Sally said looking at Mark and adding, "he's kidding you."

"Well, how am I suppose to know," Mark said.

"Seriously, so what happens now," Rick said.

"Life goes on," I said.

"Lunch is ready," my step mom said as she started setting the table.

I stopped being the table talk and after a while even the jokes got lame and we settled back into the conversations before I went into the hospital. It got a little more casual again.

Finally all the kids but Cindy left and it was just her and I back in my room again. This time she was on the bed's edge and I was in the chair.

"So tell me you've gone with colors and not just plain white on your lingerie," Cindy said.

"Wait? What? Like what," I asked not sure what she was talking about.

"You know what? Like your panties? And your slips? Like maybe pink? Like maybe lacy slips? Just so I know what to get you for your birthday, You know, colors? Lavenders? Pastels? What about trims? Tell me you at least went with day of the week panties? Oh, and just so you know, I like Hello Kitty myself," she said moving away as I reached over and started to swing at her.

"You know that sort of talk could ruin me," I said and added, "seriously."

"Duh, as if I didn't know that," Cindy said and came in close to hug me as she added, "you're talking to me remember? Me you dimwit. and lighten up my little princess. Just remember, I happen to know you're sleeping between satin sheets."

DIAPERS FOR THE PRINCESS

I shook my head at the teasing from Cindy but it was nice having someone that knew most of it. Of course I hadn't told Cindy about the diapers and decided firmly that I wouldn't. She would never let that one go. Then mom invited her to stay for desert.

Desert was simple... strawberry's with whip cream on shortcakes. The diapers and plastic pants, along with the diaper pins (in a small jar) and Baby Eczema Cream were all hidden away in the second to the last drawer in my dresser. The diaper changing pad, at first under the bed, had been neatly folded and put over everything in the same drawer thanks to my step mom. I was safe.

Or so I’d thought...

Cindy and I were making our way back to the kitchen and talking about the other kids and how easily they seemed to accept how I was dressed when mom thanked Cindy again for her help. It was dinner time and she had called us to the kitchen to eat. Happily we sat to eat thinking the worse had been passed. My step mom feeling comfortable with Cindy dropped the other shoe...

"There is still school to worry about," mom said and then added, "and of course he's still got to get use to wearing diapers, but the doctor says he'll most likely outgrow those as he gets older. Anyway, I'll leave you two to eat and talk alone. Put your dishes in the sink when your finished. I’ll be in the sewing room."

My spoon was just at my mouth when my step mother walked off. Suddenly the routine of getting ready to eat stopped. Everything stopped. The world froze. I was positive that if a plane had been flying overhead it too would have stopped. I sat there ready to take a bite but had frozen. Cindy as well had stopped moving. Both of us had frozen solid as if a switch had been thrown.

"Diapers? I must have missed that part of our earlier conversations," Cindy said sitting her fork down before putting her hands together to rest her chin on them. She put her chin in her hands with her elbows on the table She had interlaced her fingers in a girlish pose and was fluttering her eye lids at me as she added, "why darling, I do believe your cheeks have simply become luminous."

"Stop," I said quietly as I added, “no one was suppose to know about those.”

"Diapers? Diapers as in diapers that you lay your cute little bottom over? Diapers that a mommy will pull between you legs and pin closed kind of diapers? Diapers that you cover in.... be still my heart, sweet crinkly, shiny baby pants? Are we talking about those kind of diapers," Cindy asked.

"Are you done yet," I asked.

"Not even close, but I can pause long enough for you to answer," Cindy said.

"It's not what you think," I said.

"Oh precious, it's too late for you to start telling me what I'm thinking," Cindy said and then added, "I'm so far ahead of you now that it's going to take days for you to catch up. But if you think you can change any of that you're more than welcome to try. Just let me catch my breath and see if I can lower my heart rate a little. Okay, go ahead?"

Cindy started breathing in and out of her mouth slowly as she fanned herself with her hand.

"Are you finished now," I asked.

"I'm finished," Cindy said and then more softly added, "for now."

"It's for a skin cream I need," I said and then added trying desperately to be as serious as I could, Cindy, it's for the allergies. I've got to apply it to the folds to keep moisture out, and keep it from being rubbed away. It's a corticosteroid cream called Baby Eczema Cream and the diapers help wick the moisture."

"Wait? You're right, it wasn't even close to what I was thinking. It’s even better! Did you just say you're wearing diapers for a Baby Cream? A baby's cream? I did hear that right! Right? You know what? I think I'm just going to go ahead and faint," Cindy said laughing and added as she clutched her heart, "will you just marry me, now, please? No wait, never mind. How about we just do the honeymoon?”

“Will you stop,” I pleaded.

“I know, you could wear just your diapers and under a sweet pair of baby pants, maybe a cute little white baby dress and I could carry you over a threshold at some hotel and spend the night... I am going to faint. Yes, a honeymoon. Just so I can diaper and play with you on our wedding night and every night after that,” Cindy said.

"Stop it. Besides, we're too young to be married," I said laughing. It was good that she was making jokes.

"Okay, so we're too young to get married. Tell you what then.... can we at least play house till we're old enough. You know, you be the baby, I'll be the mommy," Cindy said and then added, "of course you can be the girl baby one day and wear your little dresses and nighties. Going to have to be baby dresses now I suppose."

"You're killing me," I said.

"Okay, enough teasing. Look, this has got to be tough on you, I get that, but it's not life ending right? It's just more stuff? It's mostly just funny," Cindy said and added, "and maybe a little cute as well."

"Cute," I said.

"Hey, don't look a gift horse in the mouth. At least this gives you a step up," Cindy said.

"Step up? How does that work," I asked. She had me so curious the urge to run away was suddenly gone. I wasn't even thinking about choking my step mom any more.

"Look, you're one of three guys that I hang out with. Before this none of you stood out much which is why none of you have ever been worthy of my girlish charms. Mike is too tiny, Rick has always been too big and you were always sort of average. That’s not a bad thing, just a thing. Now all of a sudden you're just right. You know, like Goldilocks' and the three bears. All of a sudden, you're the cute baby bear but as in diapers, get it? Which now raises you to the level of compatriot," Cindy said.

"Compatriot," I repeated. To be honest I had no idea what she was talking about or how it related to what I was going through. Or for that matter how it connected Goldilocks' to the panties or diapers but she seemed comfortable with it?

"Linus, don't you get it? You are now a bud, as in buddy, a chum? Come on, do I dare say this? You are now officially a friend close enough to be a true confidant. Do you know how important that is for a girl," Cindy said and then added, "only girls qualify for this position most times, and only a few for that matter, even more rare for a boy and yet here you are exalted. Overnight!"

"I'm not sure what you're saying," I asked that honestly, and I think I was getting it answered honestly, but I needed to hear it. I think she was saying what she was saying because I wore panties, and the equivalent of a slip. But I wasn't sure still as I added, "all because I'm wearing... you know girl clothes?"

"Not just girl clothes, but yes, that's some of it," Cindy said.

"Then is it because I'd be wearing diapers," I asked. Did that lower or raise me?

"Linus, you're getting in touch with your feminine self, but just as important, you've been humbled because of your diapers. You've had to put aside your masculinity. You've been raised to the equivalent level of a girl friend," Cindy said and added, “Linus, you do realize that a girl has to wear almost the equivalent of a diaper every month? Right? You know that right?”

“What? Why,” I asked then suddenly I understood and said it, “your periods?”

“Exactly,” Cindy said.

“You’re saying this is the same,” I asked.

“No, not exactly the same but it’s a taste of what we go through,” Cindy said and added, “Linus, I’ve never met another guy in my life that’s come as close to knowing what it’s like to be a girl as you. That’s worth something.”

“Wow, I guess it is,” I said.

“Now when can I see you in your nice thick diapers and those sweet plastic baby pants? They do crinkle right," Cindy asked.

"You realize that asking to see me in them doesn't exactly make me feel comfortable," I said. I was trying to figure out why I was uncomfortable and couldn't.

“Because I’ll see you, at your most vulnerable,” Cindy said.

“What,” I asked.

“You’ll be even more vulnerable than in your dress,” Cindy said.

She said it was because we thought we, as in guys, were superior, but that was only because we thought it. We really weren't. With some exceptions some guys were equal and I was now one of those. This was according to Cindy. Then she got back to wanting to see me in my diapers.

I didn't argue with her about girls and guys and which sex was inferior or superior, but I did hold back on that diaper viewing request. That was too embarrassing to even consider since even telling her was still to embarrassing to consider - still. I didn't blame mom although I regretted that it happened. Besides, I still hadn't even seen myself in my diapers.

I think the day ended with that still in the air and Cindy satisfied that someday she would see me in "baby mode" but I refused to call it that. As it also happens she was bent on helping me by bringing all her skills as a girl to my problem on learning the art of girl stuff. When I asked what that meant she laughed and said it was sort of like I was a closeted cross dresser needing to get out, and skipped off for home. I kept thinking I didn't want to know.

My step mom had read the paper left by the clinic nurse and asked me to read it as well as she handed me her cleansing cream for my face. She showed me how to remove my makeup while she read the paper then she removed hers while I read it.

What became clear and just as unnerving was how much of it mapped to the treatment of me imagined as a baby. For instance my skin because of allergies was going to be constantly at risk of being damaged and thus in need of perpetual but minor repair.

Harsh soaps were out. Lotions and less caustic soaps were in. There was mention of Aquaphor or Eucerin brand moisturizer cream after Johnson and Johnson's or Dove's baby soaps and shampoos. Mom had already gotten those from the list.

There was talk about Vaseline and hypoallergenic bath towels made of Bamboo. My step mother had gotten one from the clinic nurse and a couple from the store but we’d need more. I was amazed at how much cotton was in my life as I looked over at the coach and the cover.

It had taken the cleaning crew the afternoon to clean the furniture and carpets. Cindy's visit, then the kids and then Cindy’s stay had taken care of the rest of the day. By early evening I was exhausted and mom was mom again telling me I wasn't going to push my first day back too much longer. It was time for bed. I was too tired to argue.

BABY MODE

Mom, satisfied my makeup was gone and that we understood the next and final process for my care. She left to start my bath. I stayed in the kitchen nervously waiting for the inevitable. It seemed like only minutes had passed.

My step mother poked her head into the kitchen, smiled sheepishly and said my bath water was ready. I knew what she meant because somewhere past the bathtub was that damn diaper. I don't know why but all of a sudden I felt like a child no older than a toddler. Trouble was I was going to see my "toddler clothes" when I went to change out of my clothes.

Thankfully my step mom was wasn't in the room when I went in to change, and there it was. On the bed was the new changing pad opened and sitting in the middle of the bed. It was a two foot by three foot quilted pad designed to lay on and not slide. It was made to fold and unfold and on top - My new diaper and baby pants.

White on white right smack on top of the changing pad, opened and smoothed after being folded. I remember that particular fold being "best for boys". It struck me as being very white and fluffy with the shimmering side ready. That silky nylon was going to be laying against my skin. I wasn't sure why that struck me so odd but it did. I turned to look at the door before moving over to it and running my hand over the center. That polyester layer was as silky as it looked.

There were two open diaper pins sitting next to the jar of that corticosteroid Baby Eczema Cream which was what all of this was about. I cursed my luck and then ran my hand over the waterproof panties. My rumba panties without the ruffled lace. The nylon over the plastic like layer slid and my penis hardened. Rumba panties! That's what Cindy would call them if and when she saw them. Of that I was positive.

I couldn't stand it, I glanced at the door, stepped out of my flats quickly, removed my socks and dress and was about to step out of my teddy and stopped. I realized I couldn't use the robe - it was cotton. I realized I'd have to leave my "lingerie" on. I headed for the bathroom with my teddy on. I knew I could only come out of the bathroom with just the towel. I darted for the bathroom with my erection pushing the teddy forward.

I closed the bathroom door and locked it. This was going to be absolutely necessary I'd decided or I’d be more embarrassed than I'd ever been. I removed my teddy and sat on the toilet with the lid down and teddy now in hand. I folded the teddy in two

I closed my eyes, draped the teddy over my erection and thought of Cindy diapering me while we played house. I imagined her the mommy and I the baby. The irony of reaching climax thinking of Cindy diapering me wasn't lost on me as my toes curled in pleasure. So the question over how horrible was it that I had to sleep in a diaper came back to me as I climaxed explosively.

Meanwhile I rinsed my teddy and squeezed it as dry as I could dropping it in the hamper before climbing into the tub. If mom asked I’d tell her I had “rinsed my intimates” like she did. Lame I thought but it hid my sins.

I washed starting with the Johnson's no more tears baby shampoo and Dove soap rather than the medicated soap for the smell. When I was done washing I dried paying very close attention to my privates, and gingerly dusted myself before wrapping the towel around me. I smelled of lavender talcum powder when I stepped into my bedroom and faced my step mother.

"Hopefully this won't take all that long," she said patting the diaper.

“Hopefully you can do this without me laying here," I remember saying.

It was an ice breaker that allowed both of us to laugh away our nervousness. It wasn't that funny but I for one needed to laugh. I wanted to wait for her to compose herself which took about three seconds, so I removed the towel and walked to my bed naked. It was like the walk of a condemned man.

There was just no easy way of doing this. I knew it, she knew it and I just avoided her eyes as I reached the bed, turned and laid over the diaper before spreading my legs as wide as I could. I slept on a double bed with it positioned under my window which was in the middle of the room so I had both feet towards either edge of the bed.

With my legs spread my step mom had plenty of room to kneel between them. There was something wrong with that image as I laid there with my step mother kneeling between my legs. Trouble was it was just as I imagined it would be. She took a moment to slip a latex glove on. I looked up at the ceiling.

She picked up the Baby Eczema Cream and held it with her right hand and used her gloved left index finger on her left and that's when I closed my eyes. Nothing I had done in the bathroom made any difference. The instant she began massaging the cream gently over the crevices between my testicles and thighs my erection sprang into existence.

She moved quickly, ignoring my reaction and went under the testis. There was a lot of fiddling on both sides of my penis but I never opened my eyes. I felt my sack lifted and her fingers fondling me under it. I was almost ready to climax when she stopped. I could breath again but didn’t.

Finally I heard the lid go on the jar, then thankfully I felt the diaper get tugged between my legs, folded over and quickly tugged together and pinned, first on the right, then the left. She moved back a little bit to clear my legs, turned so she was sitting as she took up the whisper pants.

"You can get into these standing honey," mom said.

That's when I opened my eyes. I brought my legs together, turned and instantly felt the thickness of the pinned on diaper between my legs. I brought a foot up so she could slip those over one then the other to my knees, then up to my diaper as I balanced with a hand on her shoulder.

I remember seeing and feeling the diaper gathering as I moved my legs in a slow scissor like fashion to set the panties in place. There was an unnerving visual from that fluffy "V" that formed. I stood patiently for the final adjustments with her sitting fully on the bed and me in front of her till it was done

"It will get easier," She said fusing with the waist and legs till she was satisfied.

I said I knew that and also said I couldn't help that other part. Not mentioning the erection by name.

My step mother had laughed just a little and said she was expecting it. I was normal and that was normal. It had actually gone fairly easily and quickly and on her way out of the room after my hug. We both needed the space. I needed the mirror after closing the door. My face was on fire. I was in baby mode.

I was in a very thick diaper and those shimmering double layered baby pants! It was everything I'd imagined it would be and maybe a little more. And it was insane? I mean here I was admiring how I looked and actually half wishing Cindy was here with me. Sort of . Then not.

I was running my hands over the silk of the panties, sliding the layer of silk like material over the plastic of the panties. I was pushing softly on the panties and against the diaper pushing gently against my erection. The sliding layers made a rustling noise. So much for the whispering part

Those panties sat over the thickness of the diaper making me think on the image I was seeing and that I should be so humiliated. Yet I wasn't, not even a little, and there as I was pushing and rubbing and gently fondling myself I was remembering my fantasy of Cindy and I playing house...

My legs stiffened again as another orgasm came on quickly. What a day it had been as I exploded into my diaper standing there. I wondered if I’d violated any medical code by doing so realizing I’d might have rubbed off all the cream but then also realized it was off my penis and might not be that harmful?

I went to my drawer and tugged one of the new nightgowns out and let it fall free and shook my head as I gathered the nylon. It was white styled like a long tee shirt. It was fairly plain but silky to the touch. It slid over the panties easily as I moved it in front of the mirror and thought about the day.

I'd only been released from hospital at 8 o'clock that morning, my step mom made a light breakfast and then the health nurse came by at 10 and left at 11. Mom went out a short time later and was back by noon with my new girl clothes and then I was hanging with Cindy by early afternoon and my friends an hour later.

I was in my new dress over a teddy with Cindy doing my makeup and hair then my nails. Hanging with the kids for a time, can't remember exactly, then hot dogs and Cindy found out about the diapers. Now I'm in those diapers, and by the clock, it's 9 o’clock. I was girlish and now babyish. Just a tad over twelve hours had passed.

This is going to sound completely insane but I went to my desk and got my phone and sent a text: "Done" to Cindy meaning the diapering was finished. Don't know why but I hit the letter "V" that it went very fast.

Which I guess just meant for me that thankfully it was over. I don't think I meant for it to mean come over, but suddenly I'm typing "FYEO" For Your Eyes Only and the word "whenever".

My phone pinged that I had a text back almost instantly. I was shocked when she answered that read F2F in 3 which meant Face To Face in 3 minutes. I thought she was kidding. No way I thought. I was actually still snickering and folding the changing pad off my bed when the tap came in on my window two minutes later which meant she had sprinted all the way.

I peeked between the shade and it was really her. I'd locked the bedroom door for "just in case" and moved to the window leaning over the bed. I had blinds so all I had to do was pull the cord to raise them. She was catching her breath when I pulled the cord. I pushed the window sideways and whispered "hey, what are you doing here?".

"Hey. Are you kidding you sent me a text? Step back, let me see," She said and I blushed, stepped back under the light and held my arms out.

The nightgown really was styled like a long tee shirt with short sleeves but it was nylon. It shimmered, but there were no decorations and it ended just above the knee. I made a full 360 turn keeping my arms out so she could see that.

"That's cute and all, but that's not why I'm here precious," Cindy said and added, “mommy wants to see her baby girl’s diaper.”

I was still under the light when I was facing her again so I took up the nightgown from either side and lifted it. I let the gasp I heard go unchallenged and did another 360 degree turn slowly.

"Oh my God. You are so adorable," Cindy said and then added, "thank you for sharing this with me."

"You're welcome I guess," I said but then went quiet. I wasn't sure what to add.

"What does it feel like," Cindy asked, as she added, "can I see it again? Turn again."

"Feels like a diaper I guess," I said moving back under the light and lifting the nightgown once more.

"Its' really thick looking," Cindy said.

"The nurse said it's made thicker because the material isn't as absorbent as cotton," I said.

"Nice," Cindy said.

"Nice," I said and then added, "why would that be nice?"

"It's just that if you're going to wear diapers precious, you'd want them to be thick? Right," Cindy said and then added, "I mean I would. What I mean is it just makes more sense that diapers should be thick. Really thick."

"If you say so," I said.

"Oh I do baby, I do," Cindy said and then added, "and I so badly wish I could be in there with you right now."

There were two video clips I didn't know about: That first of me turning in the nightgown and the second with me lifting the nightgown showing the diaper and turning for Cindy. I didn't know about either videos.

Because I was directly under my bedroom light and Cindy was holding her phone right against the screen the quality was fairly good. There would be no doubt who it was and what I was wearing.

Meanwhile we talked, with Cindy leaning against the outside and me resting against the bed board. Although every once in awhile she would make me get up, back up and show her again what I was wearing. She kept suggesting adding something to my "nightgown" which I kept saying was a "nightshirt".

She insisted my "nightgown" could be a lot cuter if I had something, even something masculine like Thor in a leather skirt on it, so I started countering sarcastically with Barbie or Princesses as a joke. She promised to show me what she wore and even went so far as to share one of her's if I wanted.

I didn't want to, at least not openly. That was the other thing about this whole thing. Before today I didn't have a thing for "this thing". I'd always thought myself mostly normal as boys go. I can't remember ever wanting to wear anything of a girls. Yet here I was, far from normal suddenly. Way far from normal.

Now all of a sudden I wasn't so sure. Fortunately I had a reason for all of it. Every bit of it was justified, but it didn't change the fact that I liked every bit of it. I even liked it when Cindy suddenly realized I actually was wearing something closer to rumba panties. She caught on to those when I was turning and the light caught them. Plastic and silk shine differently... I was wearing silk-ish stuff.

"Are those just plastic pants or what," She'd asked and added, "they shimmer in the light funny?"

"Plastic, but they've got a layer of nylon. The nurse called them whisper pants. It's so they don't get pulled down at night when I move around in my sleep," I said.

"Nylon? Like panties? So they're like rumba panties, but without the ruffles," Cindy said instantly. She didn’t even hesitate.

"That's exactly what I thought," I said and then added, "I knew you'd call them that."

"How many pair do you have," Cindy asked.

'A couple, two, but my step mom says she's going to get more," I said.

"Tell you to shop on Ebay. They actually sell teen and adult size rumba panties," Cindy said and added, "they look exactly like real baby style rumba panties. Seriously, they've got layers of ruffles and actual bows."

"How is it you've seen them," I asked.

"Oh stop! I've seen them because they are so damn cute that's why," Cindy said and then added, "and that's a full blown hint... baby girl!"

"Right. As if I'm going to tell my step mom to buy me rumba panties for my diapers just for Cindy's sake," I said.

"You're wearing dresses? Okay, never mind. You're right, don't. Leave that to me. At least that way I've got something to get you for your birthday besides your day of the week panties," Cindy said and then added, "it will be one of the things I get you when I start accessorizing. You know, to go with your baby dress and bonnet set."

I ignored her comments.

I told her what the lady told me that the plastic pants was special. That it was technical, but it was as lame sounding to her as it had been to me. The bottom line was plastic panties lining nylon panties, even without the ruffles or lace were the makings of rumba panties - period.

I finally stopped arguing because I really had no arguments. I was eighteen and a boy wearing plastic panties with nylon panties over them under a nightgown. They were rumba panties without the lace. And just to prove her point I was wearing a nightgown. Besides it was pretty obvious I sort of liked the idea.

But then so did Cindy. Of course by now Cindy understood why I was wearing the diapers. She got that part. She had as much rationale as I did, but for her the reasoning was different. Cindy also got that the woman tried to justify why there were panties covering the plastic pants. But then Cindy said "who cares".

Baby pants with silky panties that could be rumba panties with just a little lace or ruffles made me so much better as a boy she said. That was what made me her Bestii? I was the best boy friend ever because I was learning about being a girl, and "she was going to help me". Whatever that meant. When I looked at her curiously she said more stuff like she had done with the makeup.

I think back on it now and realize so much of why I accepted it all was because of my step mom and Cindy. My step mom made it all so easy and logical and Cindy made it so fun. On top of those two I had a good sound reason for accepting my step mom's logic and having fun with Cindy. One day out and already I was getting more erections than I'd ever had. The latest was with Cindy standing just outside my window teasing me about being her baby in rumba panties and a baby dress.

We even tried to kiss but the screen was really gross from dust so we just said bye and she left and I went and unlocked my bedroom door, turned the light out and climbed into a very cool set of satin sheets. Now here's where things get a little confusing.... or not.

You see, boys will tell you how horrifying it would be to come anywhere near something that might rip at the fabric of their masculine universe. They lie. Okay maybe we don't exactly lie but we don't exactly know from which we speak either.

When I slid between those sheets in my nightgown wearing that thick soft diaper under those nylon lined plastic panties my mind was screaming that I'd landed in the middle of another dimension. Everywhere my hand went was silky, smooth, slippery and satiny.

The last time I'd gone to bed I'd woke in hell, this time I was in heaven.

There was nothing but sleek and sensuous. It was so incredibly sensuous. It was like living in the dark all those years and suddenly having the lights turned on. I knew exactly what Cindy had been talking about because I really was taking delight in those "feminine" elements. I was just sorry it had taken a rash to discover all of this.

No wonder girls wear nylon or silk or satin. Then I started to try and think about all the other fabrics I could now "legally" wear because of my allergies. I could wear chiffon, that sweet sheer layer that got caught on a tree bark over a satin skirt that Becky was wearing that time. I didn't think much of it then helping her get carefully unstuck but now I wanted a nightgown of it.

Tricot? Yes, I thought. Tricot was a good thing. Weren't panties made of Tricot nylon? Where did I hear about Tricot? I sat at my desk, turned the computer on and started doing searches. I looked it up. 100% nylon tricot. Tricot would be thin, filmy silky and sheer. I wanted thin filmy and sheer. I wanted panties made of 100% nylon tricot.

I wanted day of the week panties like Cindy suggested. In pink I thought as I slowly rubbed my rumba panties over my diaper. I could line my new polyester jeans in satin and wear nylon tricot liners. Boys pants with a liner would be a boys slip. It all sounded so wonderful. I could slip into pant liners of satin wearing nylon panties. Yes!

I was so tired and laid back down but I continued to dream.

I could have combinations. I felt the rise in my diaper and pleasured myself thinking of linings and liners and camisoles and slips. I exploded with a muffled grunt over the image of Cindy fluffing a dress she had just finished the hem on with me in it. A dress of taffeta and chiffon I had to wear because of my allergies. It was a really cute baby dress. I laughed because the ruffled panties showed. I imagined I had to wear a tricot dress because I had allergies. Poor me I imagined in layers of silky petticoats just before I fell asleep.

FRIDAY - MY FIRST DAY HOME.

My step mom was drinking coffee when I came into the kitchen and sat trying to figure out how to tell her I'd wet the diaper a little before getting out of bed. It's wasn't by accident. Truth was I had to. It was mostly to cover the pleasure I'd taken last night rubbing myself over the diaper. I knew if I hadn't wet myself to cover it up she might see the stains.

Trouble is I'd played with myself again this morning early. When I woke I had a raging hard on and the pleasure of rubbing the rumba panties again was overwhelming. Cindy's image replaced mom's last night between my legs and there it was. It really was incredible that softness sliding over me so I'd messed twice now, and if I didn't cover it up she'd find it for sure when she washed.

"I kind of had a little accident this morning," I said then quickly added, "mom, it's not really my fault. I couldn't get that damn nightshirt up fast enough to get the waterproof pants down to get the diaper pin open so I could drop the diaper and go to the bathroom okay and I had to go bad, really bad - okay? There! I said it, so I wet a little. I'm sorry!”

My step mom was caught off guard but that didn't last. She looked at me and quickly turned her head. I think she tried to bring her hand up fast enough, but it was too late and she sprayed coffee out before she could spit the rest back into her cup. She snickered some more out of her nose, got up and ran to the sink, grabbed a paper towel and hung over the sink laughing.

"Oh my God," she said and added, "don't ever do that again when I'm drinking coffee."

"What," I asked snickering. I got it.

"The image of you dancing around the bathroom trying to do all that stuff and then loosing it! Oh God.... I'm dying here," my stop mother said again laughing uncontrollably.

"Fine, you want to wash wet diapers for a eighteen year old that's fine by me, then go ahead," I said laughing and then added, "and my struggles in the morning are now over."

"Honey, don’t you get it? They've got to be washed anyway," my step mother said and then added, "I'm not telling you to regress and start wetting your diapers again, but for heavens sake, don't panic if you've got to go and can't make it. You're in a few extra layers that's been pinned around you. It's a pain in the neck, I get that. It's no big deal. Oh, and never, ever, describe that set of circumstances to me again when I've got coffee in my mouth! Okay?"

"Okay," I said smiling.

"Just make sure you shower and clean yourself," my step mom warned as she added, "last thing we need now is a diaper rash."

"I will," I said.

"So besides that, how did you sleep," my step mother asked and then laughed again holding up a hand and said, "wait, and don't tell me it was like a baby."

"Now that was just mean," I said.

I laughed. She laughed. The phone rang. It was Cindy. I took it. She wanted to meet right after breakfast. My step mom said it was okay, but only after my chores. I kissed mom, ate and was heading back to my room when she stopped me...

"I had a thought about the difference between little girls and girls your age," my mom said.

"Okay," I said not sure where that was leading.

"It's just that little girls and you have no breast," my step mom noted.

My step mom had an idea about wearing actual little girl clothes only because they were sewn without accommodations for breast. Things like girl's blouse and polyester jumpers didn't have darts so they might fit better. She called Cindy's mom Alice to consult with her. Cindy’s mom was a seamstress.

I ran off for my shower. I was done and in a fresh teddy and shift with just my flats filled with foot powder this time without the knee socks. I'd used a little blush and a touch of lipstick that I'd blotted hoping no one would notice I'd used makeup but I had a softer face. Cindy came over she smiled, but didn't say anything. It was like I'd been dressing that way forever and it was only day two, but my first full day.

When Cindy's mom Alice came over with her she and my mom talked leaving me and Cindy alone. Cindy grabbed my chin and gently turned me towards the light then kissed me gently saying I did pretty good on my makeup. It excited me for no good reason. And again when she said I needed a makeup bag.

We came back out of my room and mom took about twenty minutes to outline with Alice what had happened since I'd been home. Alice was very sympathetic and very understanding and immediately left for home and came back with a couple of sewing books with patterns showing more basic jumpers but this time for pre teen girls.

Alice was talking about some vintage little girl jumpers that were "straighter" and also showed us full slips for little girl's just because the shoulder straps were wider and might be more comfortable against my skin. Alice also made another point noting I could use almost all the girl lingerie pieces made if it was made without accommodations for breast.

Alice promised to fashion a light polyester jumper and slip for me designed on a little girl's style that I could wear over a nylon tee shirt before she left. Mom hugged her and I said thanks with a powerful blush. It was so odd knowing a woman was making girl clothes for me. She said making a jumper and a slip was not a complicated task.

Cindy was still looking through the books her mom had brought, then snickered softly nudging me on the coach. She was interested in the bouffant slips and little Easter dress teasing me over both but quietly. She bent closer and said that was the kind of dress and slip that was perfect for ruffled style rumba panties. I poked her back.

She also asked if I'd woken dry. I didn't tell her the truth and said yes. She said one of these days she was going to diaper me and I said fat chance but she said it wouldn't be as teens. More like a girl playing with her dolly with me being the dolly and there would be baby bottles and accessories involved like a pacifier. I tried poking her again but she moved.

The talk was mostly about more girl stuff. Feminine things. It was girly without the risk a boy might face talking about those sorts of things, and I got to do it so casually with Cindy's mom and Cindy that it was incredible. It was a delightful morning and I had post it notes on the catalogs for my step mom to see after we finished.

We looked at dresses. Before today a dress was a dress. Yet each of them unique to their style. What I wore was a simple shift. Mine was sleeveless, but some I saw had sleeves both long and short. There were sheaths, A-lines, Tents, Empires, Dropped waist, and Lowered waist. My head was spinning and those were just the dresses.

“Amazing,” I said.

"See what I mean," Cindy said.

"See what," I remember asking.

"It's like you're coming out and everyone is accepting it," Cindy said.

"Wait, what," I said.

I stopped talking causing Cindy to stop and I looked at her. I was remembering that first time I shared this with her, had it only been yesterday? That was impossible. It felt like I’d never known anything else. It felt like I’d been this way forever and yet it was just yesterday?

It was all so calm and casual even towards the end of the day right after she said she'd see me in "baby mode" and that she was bent on helping me by bringing all her skills as a girl to my problem. What she had said of that sounded similar.

"You're a kind of cross dresser but you've been in the closet - kind of - only now people are finding out about it and everyone is excited and trying to help," Cindy said.

"So I'm a closeted cross dresser and coming out and everyone is accepting it? What is it you're saying," I asked and added, "because I'm not a cross dresser and I'm not gay, nor closeted so help me understand here?"

"It's not that your a cross dresser or that your gay or closeted. It's just that with your condition people accept certain things that you're doing that boys wouldn't do normally. The thing is, you get to do it because you have to. It's like you have to do it so now you're free to do it, if that makes sense," Cindy said.

"It doesn’t make sense? Seriously, I'm not sure I'm following you," I said.

"Look at it this way... stay with me on this for a second. Let’s say you can wear panties now. In fact you are wearing panties now. Let’s say I know you're wearing panties and your mom knows your wearing panties. So does my mom now. Everyone around you, they all know you're wearing panties. Right," Cindy asked.

"Okay, yes, I guess so," I answered.

"It’s just a fact. You, a guy, wear panties, everyone knows it, so suddenly no one cares right," Cindy said and added, "no one gives it a second thought! Linus wears panties. big deal!"

"Right," I said and added, “but I’m not suppose to wear panties. I mean what about the other guys wearing panties?”

"Why does Linus wear panties? Because they are made of nylon and you can only wear nylon. Why? because you have cotton allergies. But if you were caught wearing panties for no good reason all hell would break loose. Right," Cindy said and added, "and even if you said you wanted to be a girl and started wearing panties people would be unnerved - right?"

"Right," I said.

"It’s your handicap that giving you all this freedom,” Cindy said.

“Handicap,” I repeated.

“You’ve got a handicap and that’s giving you this free ride,” Cindy said.

“My handicap,” I said.

“Exactly. So what I'm saying is even if you were coming out of the closet you wouldn't have this much freedom to wear girl's panties," Cindy said and added, "I mean look, my mom gave you a hand full of catalogs of girl's lingerie that can be easily modify for you to wear and she didn't bat an eye."

"You're right, that's pretty weird," I said.

"Weird? It's amazing! She sees you like one of us? I mean here you in girl's lingerie and my mother is making you custom lingerie of lingerie and she's happy to be doing it? How many boys you know have women sewing them panties and slips," Cindy asked and added, "hello? Seriously? How many boys you know got women making them lingerie around the neighborhood" Cindy asked.

"Not many," I suppose.

"Not many? Really? That's your answer," Cindy said and added, "come on, try none! And my mom is going to teach you how to sew panties and slips and all manner of girly stuff. We could be sewing our panties together in the not too distant future?"

"I know," I said and suddenly stopped as I deftly pulled my jumper out in the front to give me room.

"What," Cindy asked suddenly concerned.

"Damn," I said and added, "Cindy, I'm getting a little wet."

"Wet," Cindy asked looking concerned.

I had already gone through the teddy. The more we talked about lingerie and panties and the like the wetter I got. I had to stop.

"You know, as in wet," I said looking at her with my head sideways.

"Oh? Okay, I get it. Well, at least part of you is being honest," Cindy said.

"It's not funny. I'm serious," I said and added, "and this is becoming kind of a real problem."

"Actually, then you've got one more thing to consider that girl's have to worry about and that's going to be your boy period," Cindy said snickering as started to walk towards the front door.

“My what,” I asked.

“You’re boy period,” Cindy said getting up and darting off.

"Where you going," I asked.

"My place," she said and added, “come on.”

"I'm not going out like this," I said.

"Why," Cindy asked.

"Why? Are you nuts," I asked.

"And who's going to see you that doesn't know," Cindy asked and added, "come on, it's just across the street. and I'll show you what to do about your boy period."

"What the hell are you talking about," I said.

"That! That's your boy period. You're not use to wearing girl stuff and you like it. You won't admit it, but you like it so you leak," Cindy said.

"Why are you smiling," I asked already knowing the answer and I said it before she could, "another girl thing, right?"

"Right," Cindy said guiding me out the door and across the street to her house and into her bathroom..

"Can you give me a minute alone? I've got to do something," I said.

"Hold on," Cindy said snickering. She was good as her word. She opened the cabinet bent down, removed a maxi pad and handed the pad to me showing me quickly how to peel the backing and stick it onto the teddy. She left me in the bathroom and said she'd be in her room when I was done.

I closed the bathroom door, lifted the shift, slipped the sift sideways enough to find the middle then pulled the tape from the pad. After pulling the protective strip from the sticky part of the pad A pressed it against the teddy. I let the teddy come back against me and tugged it back up so I was covered by the pad.

"Better," Cindy asked.

"Much," I said twisting a little then doing the same to the shift.

"One more thing to discuss with your mom," Cindy said.

"I'm not sure I can have that conversation yet," I said feeling another drop form and get taken up by the thin pad as I added, "although it makes since that it picks up the moisture."

"There you go my little sissy. You've got to think these things through," Cindy said smiling.

We started back towards my house, My boy period now under control according to Cindy and she was right.

"Hey mom," I said coming into the kitchen from the back door. Cindy was behind me. She said hello as well.

"So what's all that," my step mother asked looking at the books and catalogs I held.

"Cindy's mom went thought some basic lingerie patterns for sewing ideas about liners. I was going to go over them with Cindy again, then you if you had the time. Alice sews a lot and said she'd help and would also teach me if I wanted and I said yes," I said.

"Really, that's excellent and yes, I'd like to take another look at your ideas," my step mother said and then added, "also I was out and stopped at the pharmacy and got you some snap on plastic pants in that PUL fabric. No panty covering but at least these might come off faster. Oh, and go take a look at some bloomers and pettipants I picked up. Just one pair each to see what you think."

"Bloomers," I asked.

"Don’t panic. They are just to try," my step mom noted and added, "If they look like they might work then we can get more. Oh, some culottes too, which might work better as slips. Could get you back into pants faster. I couldn't find any without lace but it would only take a second to take that lace off."

Cindy was grinning a kind of told you so but didn't say anything. It sort of dawned on me right then and there, as mom sat and started flipping the pages open on the lingerie books from Alice that I really was safe as far as wearing just about anything girlish.

"Come on, I want to see your new baby pants," Cindy said grabbing the package.

"They are not baby pants," I said.

"Right," Cindy said as she added, "okay then, come on baby and let's go see your new plastic panties then."

I followed her to my room.

Mom had just talked about a snap on pair of baby pants like I'd been wearing baby pants forever and it was only this morning that I'd told her about that little accident. No biggie. Then no issue at all talking about bloomers, pettipants and of all things a pair of lacy edged culottes.

"Those plastic pants should work," I said.

"I think they are cute, but I still like the rumba style," Cindy said.

"Me too," mom mumbled while snickering.

"Hey," I said and added, "You guys know I'm standing right here."

"Sorry," my mom said.

"Me too," Cindy said and then leaning over added, "not."

"You know honey, Alice is right about a little girl's slip style. I mean about the straps," my step mother said turning the book around to show me a little girl posing in a full slip next to her mother in something similar but with adjustable straps. Mom had caught the difference that Alice mentioned.

"You're right," I said as Cindy nodded and added, "just need to check his sizes and see how far those little girl clothes go up in sizes. You might just be able to buy these slips over the counter and save on sewing."

"I think the little girl slips go to size 8 maybe 9 but if you add "chubby" that adds another size up," Cindy said and added, "you might even check the size charts for the little girl clothes Mrs. Bickford. They have better jumpers for the parochial school uniforms."

"That's a good idea Cindy," my step mom said.

I twisted my head a little and scowled at her. I knew what she was doing. She had said little girl clothes, not little girl slip. She was teasing me covertly. She was hinting that I might fit into little girl clothes.

Trouble was she was right given my size, but so could Cindy for that matter, which I suppose wasn't the same. I mean teasing a girl that she could dress like a little girl wasn't the same as teasing a boy that he could dress like a little girl.

Then my mom broke in,,,

"Come to think of it, imagine how much easier all of this would be if you really were a girl with a cotton allergy," my step mother said.

"I know right," Cindy said.

"I'm not," I said.

"Or at least a transsexual," Cindy said and added, "even just transgendered."

"Exactly," my step mother said giving Cindy a high five.

"Hey you guys, like I said before, you know I'm standing here? Right," I said.

"Just saying," my mom said.

"You going to go try on your new pretties," Cindy asked.

"Underwear," I said.

"Whatever," Cindy countered.

"Be right back," I said getting up from the table and grabbing the new lingerie mom had bought. I blushed crimson draping the long culottes with the lacy trim in front of Cindy but she was sitting right there and it couldn't be helped.

"Be a shame to cut that lace off," Cindy whispered when she saw the lace. My step mom had gone to the kitchen counter to make coffee. I scowled again and dashed to my room. Truth was she was right. I also wanted to try the snap on baby pants as well deciding just to put them on then wear the new lingerie.

I was naked from the waist down and slipped the baby pants between my legs first with the small part to the front. There were five snaps to a side and I did the right side first with no problem but when I did the left side I had to more or less keep my legs closed to keep them up. I'd moistened the PVC a little inside dripping, making them slick which was all it took for them to slid over my penis.

There was kind of sensuous shock when I gently pinched myself under the slippery PUL plastic and I quickly moved to lock the door. I moved back to the bed, sat and leaned back against one arm, I stroked myself again deciding to lay back fully. In a few mind altering strokes I happily gave an overwhelming approval to my new baby pants. I used a baby wipe to quickly clean them and another around myself before stepping into the bloomers.

The bloomers gripped just above the knee and bellowed loosely with a ruffled part of the same material created by the elastics of the leg. They were an extra size larger so I tugged them high above my waist which made me very girlish looking. I thought they would feel wonderful over panties but offered no support at all alone. They felt nice over the baby pants. They were short enough that they could be useful as a slip I decided setting them neatly on the bed for the pettipants.

The pettipants were also nylon like the bloomers but longer ending just below the knee. Standing in front of the mirror with my legs together I could imagine them a half slip trimmed in lace. They too were a size larger so they didn't grip my waist too tightly and I brought them up above it. These had a snip away hem like the pant liners with a hint of lace attached. The legs were styled straight unlike the culottes. I liked them as they moved easily over the baby pants.

The culottes flared a lot more, much more, making them really more of a half slip. I actually didn't have to stand with my legs together for them to look like a skirt. They felt and looked wonderful. I walked around the room and they swished a lot like a skirt. I got to thinking that I'd wear them with panties when I could, maybe the pettipants over panties and then the culottes as a skirt. I took those off and folded them with my other "pretties" as Cindy had called them.

I put the teddy back on with my shift slipping my feet into my flats before walking back into the kitchen.

"How did those work out," my step mother asked.

I nervously looked at Cindy who had this catty little smile on her face which meant she already knew how they worked out. I hated her knowing me the way she did. It wouldn't matter what I said.

"I think the length is fine on the culottes so I don't see any need to cut them other than that bit of lace. But ever that can stay I guess," I said and then added, "they gather some but I think that's okay. The pettipants are a little shorter. The bloomers are good. With the extra sizes I can wear them a little higher above the waist."

"Wonderful," my step mom said and then added, "Oh, and I got you another package of panties, plus I found you a robe. It's polyester and white. Now let's take a look at some of these lining schemes for future pants."

Cindy was smiling.

"What," I asked.

"Nothing," She said but when my mom wasn't looking she mouthed the words, "the lace is okay... you little Sissy."

I poked her.

Most of the lining images were actual linings for skirts and dresses. It was Cindy that suggested I simply wear my "nightshirts" around the house. Why wear pants when I didn’t have to? Both looked at each other and shrugged.

Cindy was right and I knew it then. For want of a better word, I actually was out to them. I decided to experiment with that the following morning only because it was Saturday and I did most of my chores in the morning. My step mom, as far as chores went, insisted I do the hall bath and vacuum the hallway, living room, dining room. She always did the Kitchen, laundry room and moped all the floors. We both did our own rooms.

GIRL TRAINING

It was panty day I mused reaching the day when my waist had healed well enough that I could allow things to touch my waist. I was beside myself trying to decide on what to wear first. I went through my new lingerie drawer running my hand over the fabrics while wishing I did have colored panties but thankful Cindy had given me a panty liner for the white pair I had.

I was going to have to talk with mom about those, I mused.

I had woke, wet my diaper to cover my play time from the night before and again that morning and removed my nightgown to shower. I wore my new robe to lay out my things for the day before heading for the shower. I scrubbed and powdered and hurried back to my room feeling wonderful.

I put on panties, peeled the panty liner and fit it inside, and stepped into my new culottes as my pretend slip. I'd chosen one of my camisoles before putting my nightgown back on. I looked about the same but underneath I felt very girlish like I was wearing a dress.

I put on my new silky robe and greeted mom for breakfast and told her I'd wear my "nightshirt" to clean today. She said that made perfectly good since and that it wouldn't take any time at all to get use to wearing a "dress" (her word) to clean.

Here is the really funny part because I joked saying maybe I needed a little maid’s outfit. She was buttering her toast and just nodded and said that we could get one when they started coming out around Halloween. I kept waiting for her to snicker but she never did.

Anyway, I finished breakfast, cleaned up from that, and hung my robe but stayed in my nightgown and lingerie to clean. First thing I learned, and this came after mom's warning when she passed the bathroom was how to bend over in a dress - you don't.

I sort of blushed because she saw I was wearing my culottes. Since I'd left the lace on them which in retrospect was good because they sort of hid the panties but I flashed her when she passed the bathroom. I'd bent over at the waist to shake comet cleanser around the tube before getting the rubber glove on to scrub.

Mom yelled in a polite way and invited me out of the bathroom for some helpful hints on what she called her "girl in dress protocols".

It was our first unspoken mother daughter like moment. I don't think she saw it that way but I did. Beginning when I sat and she pointed out that I should first tug the skirt towards the back of my knees pulling it down as I sat. She said that because girls sitting tends to tug a dress back from the knees thus exposing more thighs. Made sense. She showed me how to bend which required me to bring my knees together and bend them twisting a little sideways while keeping my back straight.

There was also a lesson in reaching when she pointed out that my "dress" would go up but my "half slip", in this case my culottes, wouldn't. The culottes and dress were attached at different parts of the body she said so the dress rode up exposing the culottes or my "slip".

I sort of blushed there as well because I really didn't have a reason for wearing the culottes other than for the pleasure of it. I think my step mom was catching on because she said that when I got my real maid's dress I'd need a "full slip" with a cute little petticoat. Full slips tend to move with a dress she said. I laughed nervously.

That morning was wonderful and I probably did my best cleaning ever. I wiggled and twisted a lot when I vacuumed. I also noticed that when I reached up to dust the dress went up and down over the camisole "rubbing and touching" me over my chest and butt which kept my nipples perpetually hard and very sensitive. Not a bad thing at all.

Overall I cleaned a lot more than I ever had and it was noticed, only I didn't know that.

That morning had ended and I was in the shower again when dad called. He'd picked up another container ship going from China to India and back which meant another three months gone, but twice the money. Dad was the companies chief engineer and traveled from ship to ship doing on board preventative maintenance and preparation for rebuilds to keep their down times low. The one he'd just gone on needed a new crank shaft on an engine. He got a fairly huge bonus for that one.

It paid a lot but he was gone a lot. I was glad but I don't think it would have mattered him being home. After mom died he and I went further apart and that was okay because it left my new step mom and I time to fill the gap and she turned out to be wonderful. She seemed to be doing that now more than ever as odd as it sounds. She kissed me and said she was going shopping. I said I'd be at Cindy's.

She had never kissed me like that before. I left the nightgown hanging on the back of my door.

It was nearly lunch time when I got to Cindy's and Alice invited me for sandwiches and chips. I was wearing my silk tee shirt, panties and the new pettipants under a pair of polyester wide legged shorts and my white flats . I was feeling pretty cute when Cindy asked how things were going. I told her about the nightgown and lingerie that morning and how my step mom had taught me about kneeling and bending over. Cindy called them girl moves.

I repeated that term "Girl moves?"

"Don't you remember your Huckaberry Finn story," she said.

"I didn't. I mean I remember the story more or less but not any particulars," I said,

"Okay, Huck dresses like a girl but his lack of understanding on how to move like a girl gets him discovered by Mrs. Loftus," Cindy said and added, "it was one of my favorite parts of the book.

"I really don't remember," I said. I remember Huck cross dressing and going to the cabin I said and getting caught but not why.

"Well, Huck had been practicing acting like a girl and then goes to Mrs. Loftus cabin and then Mrs Loftus drops a piece of lead she uses to kill rats in Huck's lap and he closes his legs to catch it. That's when she reveals she knows he's a boy because girls don't close their legs like that. Heck didn't know boys and girls move differently," Cindy said.

"I thought it was a sewing basket or something," I said remembering something about a basket.

"You're thinking of the movie," Cindy said.

"Oh," I said.

"So let me see you sit like a girl," Cindy said.

"What," Alice said coming back into the kitchen and looking between Cindy and me.

"His mom was teaching him girl moves," Cindy said.

"Really," Alice said.

"I kind of mooned my step mom this morning doing chores. I was still wearing my nightshirt and had bent over to sprinkle cleanser around the tube just as she walked by, so she showed me how to bend over in a... you know, like in a dress," I said.

"Oh. Well that makes sense," Alice said and added, “lucky thing it was your mom.”

"It does make sense," I asked.

"Of course," Alice said and then added, "honey, we, as in we girls and women, only move the way we move in dresses because we're in dresses. You just discovered some of that because you happen to be in a dress.”

“Oh, okay,” I said.

“It’s not really girl moves so much as it’s just dress moves,” Alice said and then added, “just so happens it’s mostly girls that wear dresses. So they call them girl moves.”

“I get it,” I said.

“You're step mom gets it. We all get it and now you get it. If you're going to wear a dress, you've got to know the rest as they say. Okay, so now that question makes since."

"Which question," I asked.

"Cindy's," Alice said and added, "so what did you learn about sitting like a girl?"

"I'm not in a dress," I said.

"You can do it in your shorts. But if you insist, come on, I'll loan you one of mine," Cindy said.

"Dress for what," I asked.

"So you can so us how to sit," Cindy said.

"Never mind," I said.

"Then show us," Cindy said.

"Fine. I said standing where I was and then mustering all the courage I could I sat as if I was back in my nightgown and culottes. I reached back with both arms setting my hands gently against the shorts as if it was a skirt and petticoats (that's what I imagined I was wearing) and slid them to the bend of my knees as I sat legs together turning slightly with feet flat on the floor. Hands coming to the top of my knees thank you very much.

"Oh my God, that was perfect," Cindy said and added, "I like that bit of lace showing too."

"Not bad," Alice added, "couple more days and it's going to be almost impossible to tell you were ever a boy?"

"It's not that bad," I said.

"Actually I didn't mean that as bad," Alice said.

"Oh, sorry," I added a little surprised as we continued eating.

"She thinks you'd be way better off being more like a girl," Cindy said and added, "even if you lied a little."

"That's what my step mom thinks," I said, and added, "why would she think that?"

"You've got a condition. It's medical right? So she thinks the best way to solve it is for you to go from being boy to actually being girl. She says it's too complicated otherwise," Cindy said and added, "and I think she's right."

"You want me to become a girl," I said.

"Nope, I like you as a boy. The thing is you can be both," Cindy noted and added," I want you to become a pre operative transsexual so you keep all your boy parts, but dress like a pretty little girl. That way we can have the most delicious sleep overs and later when we get older we can become lesbian lovers.

"Interesting," I said.

"Not to mention the dolly diaper changing, bottle feeding times," Cindy said.

"You are insatiable," I said.

"Cindy," Alice said in a voice clearly meant to admonish.

"Sorry mom," Cindy said winking at me.

"With the exception of you two becoming lesbian lovers, it is something to think about Linus," Alice said and added, "it would certainly un-complicate things."

"Cindy you are the most twisted friend I've got, and clearly you didn't fall very far from the tree," I said laughing as Cindy's mom left the room.

"You know what's really funny," Cindy said whispering.

"What," I asked.

"If I was to walk you up to my room and dress you as a girl, putting you into my clothes, my makeup, you know curl your hair and start teaching you girl moves right now, my mom wouldn't bat an eye," Cindy said.

"Seriously," I asked.

"Seriously," Cindy said and added, "want to wear a party dress and learn to dance like a girl?"

"No way," I said.

“Way,” Cindy said.

“Not going to happen,” I said.

"Watch this," Cindy said and added, "mom, is it okay if Linus wears my old Easter dress and slips so I can teach him how to dance?"

"Don't play the music too loud," Alice said yelling back from dining room.

"I don't believe it. You're both crazy," I said.

"And you're scared," Cindy said taking my hand.

"What about lunch," I said.

"You can eat thinking about how that dress feels over you lingerie? Seriously," Cindy said and then added, "come on one hour. Just for fun. I'll be the male side of our relationship for now. What are you wearing for lingerie?"

"My panties and pettipants," I said and then pulled my hand back from her's and added, "you know, this is insane right."

"I'll let you have another one of my pads," Cindy said as she added, "that should give you enough protection."

"Did you hear me," I asked and added, "besides, I'm already wearing the extra one you gave me."

"Great," Cindy said.

"I asked if you heard me," I said.

"Of course I did, but you just said you did your chores in your night shirt also known as a nightgown which you wore over you brand new culottes because they were like a slip right? And your mom taught you girl moves right? So tell me how insane is wearing an Easter dress and learning to dance with your girlfriend at her house," Cindy asked.

"Because, it's a dress and up to now I've never actually worn a real honest to goodness dress. Except for the shift that is" I said and added, "and I guess I should ask, what kind of dress is it I’ll be wearing?"

"It's a taffeta dress with an attached petticoat lined in a silk like parchment with an overskirt of chiffon. Come on, it's a very pretty light pastel yellow. I really loved it. I think I'll put you in my bouffant slip too. Oh and there is a really wide satin sash that will circle your waist noisily that I will tie in a cute bow and if you're a really good boy and act like a really good girl I'll let you wear one of my pretty hair bows," Cindy said.

"What's a bouffant slip," I asked.

"It's what transforms us ordinarily girls into magnificent princesses. Or in your case a very prissy little boy," Cindy said and then added, "seriously, it's a full slip with straps and satiny bodice with attached petticoats for lots of swish. It's delightful to wear and it really is for just being a girl because you can't do anything else in it but swish around being a girl."

"Interesting," I said thankful for the pad.

"Need to change," Cindy asked.

"What made you ask that," I asked.

"Your face," Cindy said.

"What's the parchment like," I asked ignoring what she said and trying not to show how I felt.

"Oh, you're going to love that stuff. Wait till your knee moves over that. It's very silky smooth and very sleek. I guess it's like an acetate satin, looks and feels like silk, very fluid almost transparent but not quite. Kind of light but more stiff so it holds it’s shape better than nylon. You know what, it makes me think you should be wearing my nylons with the dress because that's what I wore," Cindy said.

"You mean like pantyhose," I asked and added, "I can't get naked for pantyhose."

"No silly, grip tops," Cindy said and added, "my mom got them for me. It's like a pair of friendly hands gripping your thighs and you don't have to take your panties or culottes down to get them on. So what do you say?"

"One hour," I said and then added, "and I think I'm going to need to change my pad and the bathroom right now."

"Be right back," Cindy said snickering. She was good as her word and handed the pad to me. I went into the bathroom, dropped my shorts and pulled my culottes and panties forward after removing and folding the old one to toss. I pulled the protective strip from the sticky part of the pad before pressing it against the panty. I let the panty come back against me and tugged the panty back up so I was covered by the thin pad. I came out of the bathroom wishing I'd had more time.

"Better," Cindy asked.

"Better," I said looking at the dress she was holding and now thankful I was wearing the fresh pad. It was everything she'd described and more with these gigantic puffy sleeves and lacy chiffon bodice over the silky top. Those puffy sleeves looked like the same organdy as the overskirt. It rustled very loudly. I fingered the satiny ribboned edge of the sleeve. I was going to wear that!

Cindy laid it on the bed and turned back to the closet and come out with the bouffant slip that could easily pass as another dress, and I felt myself begin leaking more into the pad anew. The slip was beautiful in pure white fabrics with a tiny bow set in the middle made of pink satin. I don't know why but that tiny little pink bow was so girlish on that slip.

"What," Cindy asked looking at me, then at the slip.

TOO LATE TO GO BACK INTO THE CLOSET

"I guess I didn't really realize what girlish meant till now," I said and added, "I mean I'm looking at that tiny little pink bow and wondering who thinks of little things like that?"

"Mother's who sew for little girls and daughters, or I guess little boys they want to make into little girls. Me if I had cute a boyfriend who has to wear dresses and who sleeps in diapers and almost rumba panties," Cindy said smiling.

"Stop," I said feeling my erection grow painful.

"Do you want me to undress you," Cindy said. She was being rhetorical but the leaking increased a little. I removed my cutoffs and tee shirt. I was tingling when I stood and thankful I'd decided to shower again after doing my chores. She spritzed me with something that smelled almost like baby powder.

"What is that," I asked loving the smell.

"Loves Baby Soft Body Spray," Cindy said and added, purse size. If you carried a purse you could have this one. Nice isn't it? Very close to baby powder scent."

"It is," I said as she slipped her hand under the petticoats and helped me into the slip. The slip was even nicer. It fell over me without stopping and instantly swished over my culottes and panties. The nylon moved over my chest very silk like and smoothly. I kept thinking how much nicer it would be if I was dressing in something like this in the mornings. Every morning.

"Penny for your thoughts," Cindy said.

"The pad you let me have is getting wet," I said.

"TMI," Cindy said.

"What," I asked.

"Too much information," Cindy said and then added, "really? Is it turning you on already? Wow, what's the dress going to do. Maybe we should stop with just the slip for now, you know, let you get use to it, then try the dress on later."

"Right," I said before adding, "I want the dress."

"Yes ma'am," Cindy said.

"It's sir, I'm not a ma'am," I said and then to lighten that statement up a bit I added, "I'm just practicing to be a ma'am."

"Your dress sir," Cindy said lifting the dress from the bed. The sash was untied and dangling and the top of the dress was opened where it zipped closed. It made me kind of light headed and I swooned to see it opening like that. I imagined it over the slip and both over me. It had a huge skirt of it's own as Cindy lifted it above my head.

"Hold your hands up," Cindy said and added, "and guide them into the arms."

I raised my arms slipping them into the soft pastel yellow tunnel above my head. It was shimmering inside and looked like someone had sprinkled glitter over the shimmer as I formed my fingers to slid into the puffy sleeve holes. Both arms went in and Cindy guided the dress down so it slid over my head. She allowed it to cascade over the bouffant slip and it’s petticoats. I fluffed in front while she moved around me fluffing the sides and back. The noises were strictly for girls ears.

It was Saturday afternoon, I'd come home Thursday. I'd been in two diapers and baby pants plus two teddy's. This was my first day in panties. Besides those panties I'd put on a nightgown and culottes. This morning I wore my first nightgown play acting with my step mom and now with my girl friend I was dressing as a very pretty girl in an Easter dress. With her mom's permission of all things. It was sort of like a conspiracy.

When the dress settled there was weight on me, not a lot but some but it pressed the petticoats of the slip against my culottes slightly pressing those against my legs a little. I moved a knee. Cindy caught the movement and stopped fusing with the dress.

"Damn, that's what I forgot, your nylons," Cindy said moving me to her vanity and pulling a drawer open.

I had already kicked off my flats that she pulled aside the moment I sat. The nylons she was gathering had elastic bands and she was about to hand me the first one suggesting I gather my dress and slips to pull it over my foot. I remember a footman in the cartoon helping Cinderella fit into the glass slipper. With Cindy kneeling before me like that and me holding the slips and skirt up I felt like Cinderella.

The act of gathering that many layers of dress and slips was making me giddy. More because of the noise of taffeta and acetate rubbing over and under the layers of sheer organdy and voile. That voile was like silk but stiffer for the tiers of slip adding to the dresses slips. I had to gather those plus the layers of organdy of the bouffant slip itself that she suggested I fold everything under and above my thighs for the stockings.

In the mirror I was suddenly reminded of an actress sitting at a vanity. I turned away from the mirror drawing nylon on my legs as I began to pull the first stocking on over my foot. I was thinking how terrible it was that boys never experience any of this. Then thinking how lucky I was to at least get to go through what I might never go through otherwise. The feel of the stockings on my leg was delicious and she was right when the top sealed around my thigh under the culottes. It felt like fingers of a hand gripping me. For a moment I imagined they were her fingers.

"Wait," Cindy said standing back up.

"What," I asked fussing with the second nylon.

"Shoes," She said leaving the room. She came back with a pair of white straps and slipped one over my foot. It fit loosely as she added, "mom's".

"Okay," I said wiggling my toes as she put me into the second shoe. I sat both feet down side my side. Something magical in seeing my feet in girl's shoes and my legs in silky nylon the color of light chocolate. Nothing left to do but stand so I fluffed the slips and dress again, and if there was any lingering doubt that I was an honorary girl It was gone.

Not bragging, just saying because Cindy hugged me big time and yelled triumphantly, "oh sister".

"Who's yelling," It was Alice and before anyone could answer she saw the shoes and added, "and those are mine, so don't scuff them! Oh my precious, you look so adorable!"

"Did you hear that," Cindy said.

I had. I looked adorable and I wasn't suppose to scuff the shoes. How was this possible? I got allergies and I'm in a girl's room dressing in her best dress and slip and mother’s shoes. I’m dressed as a girl and I'm going to learn how to dance like a girl and her mother is smiling over it.

"So what do you think the other guys are doing," I asked.

"The truth," Cindy asked.

"The truth," I said nervously. I expected something like they are not being sissies or something to that effect.

"I'll bet it's something boring and doesn't require a pad to keep them from soiling their panties," Cindy said snickering as she slid her phone into the dock and started the music.

She turned me and tied the sash into a giant bow after zipping the dress to my neck. She gave me a hug from behind bringing her hands to my waist then fluffing the skirts before I got kissed on the cheek. She went to her vanity again and found two yellow daisy clips and put one on either side of my hair.

"My sweet little sissy," she said kissing me again.

"You think," I said as Cindy stepped back and took my hands. We took up our dance positions, confusing at first with our hands and arms opposite of what would be normal for me and her.

Awkward! But the awkward made it somehow even better. What wasn't awkward was her stepping really close. That was awesome because she crushed the skirts against me and I was the one wearing them. The taffeta skirt attached to the petticoat protecting me from the nylon netting slid over my culottes which slid over the panties and even with the pad I felt it. I think I really began soaking it as we grinded together to the rhythm of the music.

"Definitely going to need more pads," I whispered.

"Fun being more like a girl isn't it," Cindy whispered leaning close to my ear. As she did so She pushed forward and slid right and left grinding the dress and slips against me. It was a mean thing to do taking advantage of me like that, and I lost it.

"I need to change," I said and a couple of extra wouldn't hurt," I said hugging her closer as I added, "and you are a mean person."

Thank you. I'll send you home with some more of mine," Cindy said guiding through the steps.

Turns out I'm a good follower which is a good trait for a girl dancing or sissies learning to be girls. I guess I was a sissy because I wasn't sure I wanted to be a transsexual or transgendered, and I wasn't gay which Cindy reminded me could still be a sissy. I said I was confused and was going to stay with just being a boy in a dress for now.

She said, that at the very least I've got to be a transsexual before I can even consider being a girl so there I was. So yes I said, I was technically just a sissy.

I kept thinking about my friends and only the girls were attractive. Except, and this I kind of hinted at with Cindy, if the guys were dressed as girls, then I might play with them if they were wearing panties... I said I wasn't sure. She asked which one more than the other?

I said Mark, if I had to consider any of the other two boys it would be him only because he was tiny and the most feminine of the two. Then I wondered how he'd look in a diaper and from that thought I wondered if he'd fit any of the regular baby diapers. I kept quiet about the erection that suddenly caused.

Rick was the largest of us all and would look like an a guy in a dress unless it was something like a leather skirt and sandals. Maybe more like a Roman or something? Then there was Sally, she too was large but Amazonian which might be attractive. Larger than Rick even and I wondered when I'd even seen her in a dress.

"Penny for your thoughts," Cindy said.

"Was just wondering if the other two guys would do something like this," I asked.

"Given the same circumstances, in a heart beat," Cindy said and added, "Mark for sure. He'd end up like you, maybe even faster. I think Mark would love to be babied. Rick might go with the lingerie but not the dresses. He'd stop at the lingerie."

"Why is that," I asked.

'He's got some serious hang ups. Mark's pretty easy going like you are. He'd adjust. Rick is going to have kinks when he's older," Cindy said.

"What makes you so wise," I asked.

"I'm not wise, I just love people and if you love people you sort of get to looking at them a little harder. When you look harder and kind of end up seeing past their shells if you know what I mean," Cindy said and added, "you need to start seeing them.. really seeing them."

"But you never said any of this before," I said.

"Because you were like Rick before this. Remember," Cindy said and added, "maybe it was because of your step mom bringing you out after a time, but you were really closed off for a while after your mom passed. Now you're like wide open, free. No secrets. You're amazing."

"You too," I said.

"We kissed, danced, kissed. It was the best day. Then suddenly I heard Sally's voice.

"Hey... you guys? Oh wow! Linus is that really you? Wow? You're really cute as a girl," Sally said standing at Cindy's door as she added, "even without the hair you've very passable. Love the barrettes."

"Is nothing sacred," I yelled.

"Your mom let me in Cindy," Sally said.

"She wasn't suppose to Sally," Cindy said and added, "this was private... oh never mind. Sally, meet Linus, Linus, meet Sally."

"Hi Sally," I said.

"Hey Linus," Sally said smiling and then added, "you really do look cute and I'm sorry to break in like this but everyone is gone and your mom said you were here and Cindy's mom just said you guys were up here dancing. You know, I've got some dresses that would fit you. Some really cute ones"

"Sally, you're like a foot taller than he is," Cindy said.

"Not the ones I wear now silly," Sally said before adding, "the ones I use to wear. You know, when I was like in first and second grade. Those dresses. I've even got a pageant dress. You'd make a really cute little girl. Hey, you know what? I have wigs too."

"Wigs," Cindy said.

"From when I had the tumor remember," Sally said and then added, "It was back when I lost my hair. I'm not sure any one remembers because mom got the wigs even before my hair started coming out. Come on, want to try on some of my dresses?"

I looked at Cindy, then at Sally. In for a penny, in for a pound I said and added, "so tell me about that pageant dress? When were you in a pageant?"

"Look at you, one dress and already you're ready for a pageant. You realize she's talking about when she was a little girl right," Cindy said looking at Sally to confirm as she added, "you are talking a dress you wore when you were what about six or seven?"

"Six," Sally said but I was really big for my age. Had that tumor on my pituitary gland. That was way back when they had to reduce with radiation treatments which made me lose my hair so I got some really cute wigs. Mom never had the heart to toss them. When your mom came over for coffee she got to talking about Linus and the subject of those wigs came up."

"Wait," I said and asked, "Cindy's mom was talking about me to your mom?"

"She came over for coffee," Sally said and added," I'd just come home. Everyone was gone! I didn't know where anyone was I thought Cindy's mom said you were home with Cindy so that's why I went to your house first."

"But what were your mom and Cindy's mom talking about me for," I asked.

"Dresses! You know, dresses for you," Sally said and added, "Wigs and dresses. I guess since you're coming out or something you needed all kinds of stuff and Alice was talking about a dress drive or something to that effect, and I've got some of the cutest things from when I was a little girl. Even shoes Linus. Lots of shoes and some of them are sure to fit. Linus, my mom never throws anything out."

"Wait a second? Who says I'm coming out," I yelled.

"She did," Sally said.

"She who," I asked.

"Cindy's mom," Sally said and added, "she said you were over at her place with Cindy learning how to be a girl? She said you were learning dance moves and before that your step mom was teaching you other girl moves,"

"Oh man," I said.

"Is something wrong," Sally said suddenly confused.

"I'm in another universe," I said while Cindy was laughing as she added, "I guess you can keep my Easter dress after all. Although mom's going to want those strap shoes back and I may want that slip but I'll donate the dress and those nylons."

"This thing is moving at the speed of light," I said.

"Seems faster than that," Cindy said.

"What about this dress drive? I don’t know anything about a dress drive," I asked and added, "why would they be having a dress drive. Who's saying I need a dress drive."

"My mother Mandy and I'm not sure but I think the woman's auxiliary." Sally said and then added, "she knows the health care nurse that visited. That nurse Baker? Is that her name? Anyway, she said the health care nurse was saying that luckily you were transitioning to female but unfortunately you didn't have any dresses. Any clothes for that matter."

"NO! That's not what she said. That's not what she said at all. She said it's too bad I wasn't transitioning to female," I said and added, "and how did your mom get into the middle of this?"

"She's been volunteering at the hospital ever since I went into the cancer ward. She and the health care nurse are really good friends. They've helped all kinds of people. Mom did a dress drive for another girl just like you. She got a sex change two years ago. You sort of got on the short list because you were put into intensive care the night they brought you in," Sally said and added, “I guess they thought you were going to die.”

"Wait a second," I yelled and added, "what list? Who's put me on a list for a sex change,"

"Not a list for an operation or anything. It's the woman's auxiliary. They keep a list of charities they want to help and someone suggested you and... well since everyone sort of knows you and this problem you've been having... you made the list," Sally said.

"Wow, It looks to me like I need to go through some of my things," Cindy said and added, "I'm beginning to think you're going to be a girl regardless if you like it or not. Thankfully it looks like you're going to like it."

"I'm in some kind of a dream," I said.

"Nightmare or what," Cindy asked.

"Not sure yet and I've got to change and get home," I said.

"Tired of wearing a dress already," Cindy asked.

"It's not the dress Cindy I've got to change and get home before this gets back to mom," I said and added, "all hell is breaking loose."

"Oh, okay, " Cindy noted with a conspiratorial grin as she added, "I understand. It will give me time to go through my things. I might as well go bag a few more items for you and I'll bring it by later after we get the dress and slip off."

"Thanks." I said.

"It took me half an hour to change which was mostly losing the dress and slip although Cindy promised me the dress but not the slip. I did get the catalog for the slip if I wanted my own. That was iffy because hanging that in my closet let along that pastel yellow chiffon dress would set off all sorts of alarms with my step mom.

Or so I thought.

Meanwhile I took my shorts and tee shirt and went into the bathroom and switched pads and was amazed at how badly I'd soiled the one I'd been wearing for that last hour.

Cindy joked when I told her by telling me that she always flowed heavy in the beginning of her "cycle". I took a swing at her but she ducked. Sally, bless her heart, was slower than Cindy on most of the jokes but she was more innocent and for a while she thought I really was having my period.

When I was back in my abnormal boy mode we made a bee line for home. Cindy decided to forgo her closet for now and I invited Sally back with me as we all left Cindy's.

Things had been odd through most of that day, but you had to see my living room to appreciate just how odd it had gotten. I'd been at Cindy's for no more than three hours.... tops.

You would have thought it had been days.

"Hi honey? Do you know anything about a Dress Drive that's being done for your sake," My step mother asked the moment I came into the living room. She was asking but I wasn't so much listening as trying to understand where all the girl clothes came from.

There were clothes everywhere. I stood there frozen and speechless.

On the couch were dresses, several. There was some lady that mom seemed to know but was a stranger to me sorting them for her. Fancy dresses to the left, Nicer dresses in the middle and ordinary dresses on the right. All in my sizes or best guess. There was a pile on the floor not in my size.

There were skirts on one of the side chairs, blouses on the other and shoes between the coach and coffee table. The coffee table seemed to be where the lingerie was going.. New panties in stacks, half slips next to full slips next to night gowns.

"What is all this," I asked looking shocked, but I knew.

"Honey, as near as I can tell, It's your stuff. It's from some kind of Dress Drive or something from the hospital, Women's Auxiliary group I heard. One of the ladies that brought lingerie, some of it is new by the way, said that she heard that a boy, you, had such a devastating rash that he couldn't wear boy clothes any more so he was going to become a girl," my step mother said and then added, "or so the rumor goes.. In fact, she said you were already in a dress at Cindy's? Were you in a dress?"

"Wait mom, this is getting too weird. Yes I was in a dress, but it's not what you think and no that had nothing to do with this? I mean I heard about this while I was at Cindy's house. Sally just told me," I said.

"But you were in a dress," my step mom asked.

"Yes, but I can explain that," I said.

"So was it an Easter dress or was that a rumor as well," my step mom asked.

"Mom, yes, I mean no. Look, that's not me doing this! Seriously! Cindy was teasing about that dress. That Easter dress. It was one time and I didn’t know about this thing with Sally's mom and a dress drive," I said.

"Then how did you become part of that," my step mom asked.

"I didn't. Sally's mom was part of it. She met up with Cindy's mom who left me and Cindy to join up with Sally's mom who I guess is old friends with Nurse Baker? Mom this is nuts. Sally just told me about it. Sally's mom was acting on a rumor started by that health nurse who by the way misinterpreted something one of us said," I said.

"What did we say," my step mom asked.

"Mom, according to what was said and misinterpreted, I'm suppose to be transitioning as a transsexual with no clothes because of a deadly virus. Since I can't dress as a boy I'm going to become a girl soon."

"I remember saying how much easier it would be if you were a girl but that's pretty much it," mom said.

"Exactly," I said and then added, "which somehow got twisted to mean I'm now becoming a girl."

“So that got spread around and now everyone is out to help you become a girl,” mom said.

“Exactly,” I said.

“And you end up with a ton of girl’s clothes,” mom said.

“Looks that way,” I said.

I was in a panic. I wear one dress, one time and I suddenly had more girl clothes than Sally and Cindy combined and Cindy was suddenly and laughably jealous. You should have seen some of the new stuff. First thing Cindy finds, making a point herself, is a new package of Disney Princess Panties. Waving the whole package in my face.

Mom's holding up a nightgown set for a girl. It's got a negligee, peignoir and even ruffled panties all trimmed in the same lace. Then suddenly Sally squeals in delight when she discovers that some of the dresses are actually her's.

"Look," She said. It was those dresses she wore when she was little. She grabbed a really cute lavender and rushes over to hold it in front of me and my heart leaps making me smile, then sinks because mom's watching me. I calm myself but realize I might have been too late.

“It’s okay,” mom whispers and adds, “we can sort this out later.”

“Look, these are the ones I was telling you about," Sally said holding a puffy sleeve out as she presses the dress against me. It actually looks like it would fit. Mom is smiling which is bad.

"So how do you want to handle this? Should we start trying these things on or go beat up the nurse," mom says.

"I don't have a clue. I think it's a misunderstanding," I said moving the everyday dresses and sitting in frustration. I still don't' know who the lady is.

"I'm Tina," Tina said.

"I’m sorry. This is Tina. She's with Good Will. She's going to take what you don't want," Mom says.

"Oh. Hi Tina," I said and added, "it's nice to meet you."

“It’s nice to meet you Linus,” Tina says.

Also thanks to Sally, I find out that I'm now the owner of two pair of nearly new Mary Jane shoes both the shiny patent leather kind with one pair brand new and should fit. I'm gasping for air and mom, sally and Cindy are sifting through things. Something they reject with out my input and hand to Tina who is setting those in bags near the dining room.

Then I'm trying to explain maybe how this happened based on what sally told me about her mom knowing the health nurse. My step mom is beginning to understand but I'm still getting glances.

Then the door bell rings and it's Mark and Rick. I throw my hands up. Of course it's the guys. Who else is going to be there when I've got a house full of girl's clothes and two girls all giggles and laughs going through them. Cindy was begging me to tell her which colors are my favorites and Sally is holding up two frilly dresses large enough for me but clearly designed for little girls asking which one am I going to wear first and both guys are just standing there looking at me.

"Just shoot me now," I yell at no one in particular.

"So it's true then," Rick asked.

"What's true," I asked.

"You're going to be a girl," Rick says.

"Seriously, I didn't think it was as bad as it was, Mark says and then adds, "I can't believe it. We had sleep overs? We even horsed around some."

"Grab ass! We played grab ass? What about those times in the pool? Oh man," Rick said.

"Will you guys chill," I said.

"Are you going to have... you know, breast," Rick asked looking right at my chest which is funny since he and I have had the same exact biological classes and he should know better.

"It's been what, six days," I yell and added, "what, four days in the hospital, three at home? Do you really think I can grow breast that fast?"

"I don't know what they did to you in that hospital? I mean what's it take to... you know," Rick said and added, “can’t they put silicon in now?”

'I had a damn rash Dufus," I said, and added, "not a sex change."

"I just saw a flyer that's saying you're having a dress drive because you're changing your sex and need clothes," Mark says.

"Will you guys chill," I said and was about to go through a big lengthy explanation when my step mother looked at me and slowly shook her head no. She jerked her head at my bedroom and asked everyone if we could have a moment and walked off with me following.

In the room my step mom stood while I closed the door. She sat on the bed, I moved to the chair and asked her what was up?

"Can I ask you something," mom asked.

"Yes," I said.

"Did you wear the dress at Cindy's," mom asked.

"Yes," I confessed that I had just before coming home.

"Will you answer me honestly then and tell me if you liked it," mom asked.

"Yes," I said. I admitted that I'd liked it. And instead of yelling or something or asking if I was gay or something she nods her head. She nods?

"You're nodding as if you already know something? You think I'm gay," I asked.

"Not really and that wouldn't matter anyway," my step mother said and then added, "to be honest, I think you're already taking advantage of a situation. With Cindy’s help, bless her heart. Am I right?”

“Yes,” I said.

“So We’ve got a set of circumstances that we should seriously considering continuing to exploit. Frankly I don't think it's going to matter what you are or even think you are, at least not for now honey. What matters is what everyone else thinks and so far it’s all in your favor,” Mom said.

"I don't understand," I said.

"Okay listen. You were very sick in the hospital," mom said and then added, "Very sick with a debilitating illness that was brought on by a severe allergic reaction to cotton. You had absolutely no control over any of that. Right," mom said.

"Right," I agreed.

"So, based on that, when you came home we had to experiment with alternative fabrics and ways around those allergies. Some of those solutions was in using girl's lingerie. So we've done that. right," mom said.

"Right," I agreed again but added, "so I could wear things more masculine over them. Right?"

"Right! We did what we could just so you could appear normal to your friends by wearing your own style clothes," my step mom said and added, "right? Right!"

"Right," I said.

"That more or less worked until your friends found out about the lingerie and those shifts and they more or less misinterpreted what you were wearing. They assumed at the very least, you were cross dressing, or at the most, perhaps it was some sort of transgendered or transsexual thing," my step mom said and added, "which from their perspective might also be right! Right?"

"Right," I said.

"And meanwhile, somewhere in the background to all this is you. You are wearing this stuff and inside we may have awakened some desires that were perhaps dormant within you," my step mom said and added, "right?"

"Maybe," I said and then blushed and added, "okay, maybe a little right."

"And maybe even wakening those same feelings in your friend Cindy as well. Meanwhile as all of that was going on the mothers got wind of this and started their own rumors about you wanting to be a girl. In their own way they've decided to help out by this silly dress drive," my step mom said and added again, "right."

"Right again," I said.

"So it appear to me there is not a whole lot we need to do for the moment," my step mother said before adding, "except perhaps make a few minor adjustments to those rumors just to slow things down a bit."

"Like what" I asked.

"Okay, first of all we let them believe you are wearing dresses, but not because you want to be a girl, but because obviously you're allergic to cotton. It really is a major medical issue. Remember, you had three days wearing those shifts, so we make it longer," mom said.

"I'm not following," I said.

"Look honey, you're a boy with a severer allergic reaction to cotton, any kind of cotton including blends so the alternatives are anything not cotton," my step mother said.

"Right, I get that, but wouldn't that just mean I should be wearing pants, shirts and socks made of anything that's not cotton? Like polyester," I asked but added, "that's still masculine?"

"You would if you were not considering some of those feelings you've been considering," my step mother said as she added, "which is why you were expanding our experiment into you cross dressing or simply gender bending."

"So am I cross dressing or gender bending," I asked.

"Don't you think that's what you were trying to find out," my step mother asked.

'I guess maybe I was," I said.

'Then we simply make all of this work in our favor," my step mother said and added, "from this point forward you start dressing as a girl, but not so radical that you loose sight of the boy too quickly. Which means two things: First we stay attached to the medical reasons. That means non threatening fabrics. Second, that you're dressing like a girl till you are truly ready to make whatever transition you're prepare to make."

"How will I know," I asked.

"I suppose you'll know when you know honey," mom said and added, "there really is no time frame for this and you're already on that road! Just keep walking on it."

I looked at her as if she was crazy but she held up her hand and said to just listen for a second. She said so far almost everyone was accepting the fact that I was becoming a girl, but what if we adjusted to be not so radical. What if we started telling people they got it half right. That my allergies only means I've got to just dress like a girl?

What if you tell them you simply have to wear things like a skirt and blouse over lingerie, but you're most certainly not going to become a girl just because of those girl clothes. What happens then? I was looking at her like she was insane but she was looking at me like she was daring me to find fault in her logic. Then she said who cares what I might be?

Then I asked her what do I do next?

"Honey, the only way this is going to work is if you simply start wearing dresses and for now we just see where it goes," my step mother said patting my arm.

"What if the guys ask me why I don't start wearing pants," I asked.

"You tell them you've thought it through and decided you'd rather wear dresses instead," mom said.

"What if they ask why," I ask.

"Tell them you don't really know why yet," mom said.

"How does that work," I asked.

“You say... I don’t really know why,” mom said.

"What if I can't," I asked.

"Then don't. Or, do this just here at home, till you feel comfortable doing it outside and if it's never so be it," my step mother said and added, “and you wear more masculine things in front of everyone else.”

"But seriously, how do I handle this," I said and then added, "you know, with the guys?"

"Honey you don't. You can’t," my step mother said and then added, "you let them handle it."

"I don't understand," I said.

"That's because you don't know what their hang ups are and you're not suppose to. You be honest with them, tell them the truth and if it's too much for them to handle you tell them you understand and if they choose to, there are therapist, books, videos, all sorts of stuff that may be able to help them," my step mother said and then added, "otherwise, there's nothing you can do for them. It’s not your job to educate them. It’s their job to learn."

"But what if they walk," I asked.

"Then they were going to walk anyway," my step mom said and added, "and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it."

"What about school," I asked.

"If you can't do this at school don't, if you can do it. Do it. If you’d rather, for now at least, we can try home schooling," mom said. Non of this is life threatening and besides, if you want to know the truth, there are a couple of dresses I'm dying to see you in."

I got up and all I could do was hug her. She got it, Now all I had to do was go back out there and try and explain it, but even that was going to fairly easy when my step mother suggested she take the first pass at that. I was more than willing to let her. We left the bedroom with me almost skipping.

"Okay everyone," my step mother said and then added, "you've all heard about it, some of you visiting Linus saw it in the hospital. Obviously the worst is over but there have been changes and because of that things got a little confusing. So here is what is happening:

Sally, Cindy, call your moms and tell them to stop this dress drive for now. We don’t need to do that just yet. Too much too soon. We will set down with them when the time comes and discuss this. Sally, have you mom contact the women’s auxiliary and stop them as well. That needs to happen right away. Okay?”

“I’ll do that,” Sally said.

Tina, I need you to pack up what you’ve got so far and leave for now. Linus needs the breathing room. If you don’t mind waiting till I call you to pick up what we don’t want for the next go around. Can you do that,” mom asked.

“Of course,” Tina said as she stopped shifting through things and went to pick up her purse before grabbing the three bags she had packed already.

“Thank you Tina,” mom said.

Mom turned to the boys.....

“Okay, guys. I've heard from the girls so what I want to hear from you boys on how you are going to support your friend here,” mom asked.

"How's that Mrs. Bickford? Mark asked.

"Well, you know about Linus's rash and the fact that he's got to more or less wear girl's clothes because of it right, Right! Mostly lingerie because it's not cotton so far, but it could be more," my step mom said.

"Like dresses," Mark asked.

"Like dresses. Yes, it may come to that Mark. We're just not sure yet. Which means a lot of ribbing from the other kids but not, I hope from his friends," my step mom said and then added, "so can I count on your support?”

"Is he going to be a girl or what," Rick asked.

"Don't know," my step mother said and then added, "too far down the road yet. Does that matter to you?"

"Yes? No? I don’t know. No, not really I guess," Rick said after some thought.

"Excellent so the original question still applies. Will you support him during this worse time in his life," my step mother asked.

"I will," Mark said.

"Me too," Rick said but then added, “not sure if I’ll play grab ass with him any more.”

I snickered, so did everyone else.

“Fair enough,” mom said.

I thought for sure they'd laugh or say no way or just stand there in silence but that didn't happen. That's when my step mom proposed they all stay over for mac and cheese and we talk about whatever it is guys and girls talk about. There was a lot of laughter as mom went into the kitchen.

My step mom suggested I fix a place in the garage to hang all the dresses, skirts and blouses in some kind of order so we could go through them when we had a chance. I asked Cindy to put the lingerie on my bed and Sally to do the shoes in my closet.

Rick and Mark went out into the garage to help me rig two half inch electrical pipes dad had used for the patio lights where the second car space was. We did one pipe, then another three feet apart with both hanging by rope. That took almost the time that the girls got the shoes and lingerie into my room. All four of us got the dresses, skirts and blouses hung and the living room cleared by the time the mac and cheese was ready.

There were four more ladies from the women’s auxiliary with hand made flyers dropping off dresses while we ate. Mom told them what was going on and they immediately started making calls from the living room. Within about fifteen minutes the dress drive had ended. We added what they had to the dresses in the garage.

Mom called Sally's mom and had her stop the flyers.. It was late enough that everyone was ready to go by the time dinner ended. I didn't get one negative remark from the guys and in fact it was Rick that said no matter what he thought I was cool, and if I did decide to be a girl I'd make a cute one. I think I blushed.

Mark said we couldn't have any more sleep overs and I said I understood but then he hugged me. Although it was Cindy that told Mark if he wore a nightgown he could have a sleep over with the girls. Mark was very quiet after that.

Sally said I was officially a girl no matter what I decided, and when I wanted to learn about pageant stuff all I had to do was ask her. I said I would and I actually kind of meant it. There were at least three dresses to die for hanging in the garage. They had been her's as a little girl and all worn for pageants. The wigs still on Styrofoam heads and were standing on the washer side by side. Next to them were matching bows for the dresses protected in plastic bags

Cindy hugged me too but she asked me in a whisper if my pad needed changing and kissed me. I said she was just hung up on pads. She said no, she was hung up on making me wet mine which made me wet mine. Cindy was definitely going to be my biggest problem which made me smile because I could have those kind of problems all day long.

Cindy was the last to leave.

My step mom was cleaning the dishes when I joined her in the kitchen. We were not loving close before this night which was some of the reason I always referred to her as my "step mom". But on this night I was incredibly close to her and I came behind her and squeezed her with my head against her back.

"You are amazing," I said.

"So are you," she said turning around to hug me back.

"How do you think dad's going to take to all of this," I asked feeling a little panic as I added, "mom!"

"Don't you worry about your father. You'll find he's a lot more supportive that you think. Meanwhile he's a long ways off," my mother said turning back to the sink before she said, "go on take your bathe then grab a bag and go sort though your lingerie and keep what you want and bag what you don't. No need to worry about colors and lace any more,"

I grabbed my white robe and a new nightgown with a Unicorn on the front. I also took up a pink pair of panties to wear till I'd be put into my diaper. I ran the bath and shook in the Love's Baby Soft Bath Beads that Cindy had shared. I peeled off the pad rolled it up and tossed it into the trash and folded the culottes to masturbate with and took a few minutes to pleasure myself thinking about the pageant dresses.

With my panties rinsed and the tub full I eased in and closed my eyes to the memories of the days events. I scrubbed myself clean and used my old lingerie to bring myself to climax a second time. It the images of the day it only took a few strokes for an explosive outcome. I was wondering as I waited for the pleasure to pass how long it would be before doing this would no longer be necessary. I smiled. Never, I decided.

"How did you do on your lingerie," my step mom asked.

"I guess I'm either to greedy or to needy, not sure which yet," I said and then added, "I kept nearly everything that fit. I’ve got stuff folded on my dresser and no room in my drawers. I promise to go through everything again and maybe that second time maybe close my eyes..

She laughed.

“Or perhaps we just get a dresser for your lingerie. Tell you what, go get a basket from the garage and put the extras in that for now and we’ll figure out what to do about it later,” mom said.

I could only smile at the irony of it all. This was turning into an adventure that I hadn’t expected. I had a garage full of dresses and a room full of lingerie, not to mention a drawer full of diapers and baby pants. All supported by a step mother and girl friend fully ready and capable of seeing me take whatever ever steps I was willing to take. All I could do was shake my head.

It was warm enough that I left the robe in my room and wore just the nightgown with the Unicorn on it with a pair of pink flats It was a cute look and my step mom said so. She had me stop at the garage door then returned with a brush and two barrettes brushing my hair to either side with bangs sweeping to the front. She used the two little girl barrettes on either side and nodded before sitting the brush down to go out to the garage.

"That was nice," I said.

"It's going to be the little feminine things that help," she said and added, "before bed I'll paint your nails with a clear, Maybe even a hint of tint. Pink is always a good stand by. Wait till you smell the ethers and feel the contraction of enamel as it dries for the first time. I still remember when my mother painted my nails that first time.

MOM, WE NEED TO TALK

“Mom, I need to talk to you about something,” I said.

“Okay,” my step mother answered in the same cautionary tone I’d just used.

“The thing is I’m not sure how to even start this conversation,” I said and then added, “boy this is going to be really embarrassing.”

“Is this going to have something to do with intimate contact,” mom asked and added, “and the application of your baby cream?”

“Yes! Definitely that, but there is one other thing as well,” I said pausing.

I was stuttering and hesitating. I’d started to blush crimson. How do you tell you step mom she was giving you an erection or that you were getting turned on when you stepped into panties and soaking them with pre-ejaculate. Hell, I’d only just learned about it myself and that was thanks to all knowing Cindy.

We’d just had that conversation, her and I. She’d jokingly called my wetting my period, which was really my pre-ejaculate. She said that’s how she knew I was getting turned on wearing girl clothes because of that pre-seminal fluid or Cowper’s fluid. Who knew? Cindy knew more about it than I did which was par the course. I produced it to lubricate her she said but then quickly said “that wasn’t going to happen till we were at least 16”. Bummer.

“Honey before you tie your tongue into a big giant sloppy knot trying to explain things why don’t we do this: From here on you can diaper yourself which obviously is going to include applying the baby cream before the diaper,” mom said and then added, “as for this other thing that you’ll never get out. Cindy and I talked and she took the liberty of buying you a package of pads that she brought over. I’ve put them under the sink in your bathroom. Was that what you wanted to talk about?”

I was flabbergasted. First because Cindy had said anything and then relieved that she had said something. All I could do was blush deeper and nod yes. I hugged mom and said thank you. She told me I was welcome and that we would need to sort through the dresses tomorrow.

Meanwhile I was anxious to get a new pad into my panties as I excused myself and headed for the bathroom. The phone buzzed just as I reached the bathroom so I moved the few feet for my room and the charger to see Cindy’s name. I grabbed the phone from the dock and walked back to the bathroom hitting my pass code.

“Hey,” she typed and added, “so baby girl, what are you wearing?”

“Unicorn night T,” I typed and then added, “YMMD for You Made My Day.”

“4?,” Cindy typed back asking “For What”.

I went on to type what mom had said about me diapering myself and then Cindy’s intervention with the pads and how she was becoming a serious (I typed that in caps) friend. I said I was going to count the days till we could have sex which was by my calculations about 1,095 days which I typed. She typed a bunch of “ha” back.

When I typed a bunch of “?”. She explained that she had no intention of waiting 1,095 days for sex. What she meant she typed was she wasn’t going to have intercourse till we were 16. That didn’t mean sex!

She went on to type that boys were not the only ones that could masturbate! Till then there were a lot of ways to satisfy our sexual urges. She typed she was using one of them as the letters came up.

When I typed more question marks she typed more “Ha” and sent a hint by typing the word look up the word “vibrator”. Promising she’d talk more about it later.

Then I brought up the issue of her calling me “Baby Girl” and said I wasn’t sure I was comfortable with being called that. She sent another “ha” but promising to get me past that part as well.

I was about to ask what she meant when she typed the question “so when was the Baby Girl” going to be diapered for bed tonight?” In exasperation, and a private sigh, I gave up protesting and typed 8 o’clock. I forgot to ask what she meant but started flipping through the catalogs to look at baby dresses.

I was becoming such a sissy as the frilly short dresses came into view. It was when I found the diaper covers and a pair of rumba panties that I was thankful for the pad. I began wondering if they really did sell those kind of diaper covers for people my size promising myself to see when I had the chance.

I didn’t know that was already being taken care of. Seems that priority had been raised by Cindy with Sally, thanks to Sally’s mom Grace. Grace knew, via her friendship with Nurse Baker that I was already wearing diapers. Thanks to Cindy, Sally knew I was wearing those whisper pants which to Cindy were rumba panties without the ruffles.

In that past conversation with Cindy all those whisper pants needed were ruffles. What Sally suggested, thanks to Grace was making the panties from scratch. When she had talked about going on line to buy adult or teen size rumba panties she was being serious and had found exactly that.

“It’s just baby pants and panties,” Grace said showing Cindy a catalog of actual baby patterns. That brought up the subject of size which didn’t seem to phase Grace even a little, nor the complexity and within twenty minutes Grace had Cindy cutting out the basic design in bubble gum pink.

Since they didn’t really have to be seriously waterproof size was the issue first and Cindy promised to get my waist and thigh sizes before the elastic had to be fixed onto the panties. When Cindy asked about making a baby dress to match Grace simply had her pick the pattern.

That night that Cindy and I were texting, Grace was putting the finishing touches on my first baby dress. There would be rumba panties, a bonnet and a simple taffeta slip for the “swish”. That was Grace’s idea - that swish. She said little girls loved swish and she assumed so did sissies or as in my case boys transitioning to become sissies.

Oh, and for the record, I was actually conned into giving up my thigh size. That was Cindy when she lied and told me she had a box of “thigh high stockings”. She said she thought might fit, but she needed me to measure my “thighs”. I did but it turns out they were too small or so she said. She lied of course but she had my thigh measurements and called Grace with the sizes.

SUNDAY SORTING THROUGH THE DRESSES.

Mom put me into the middle of a fantasy as we stood at the dresses and began looking at each. We made a yes or no on each one which eliminated about a third of them overall. Mom pulled the dress from the rack and held it out for me to look at. Mostly it was condition or style. That filled two large bags. Next we separated them by practical and play (her words).

The play dresses were just that she said surprising me. When I asked what she meant she said I had not gone through my little girl phase growing up so I needed dress up time and clothes for it. Mom told me that Cindy and Sally could help me with that and maybe I'd even get a dolly. The dress up dresses were very frilly dresses, like mostly the pageant dresses and that Easter dress.

For the practical she separated those by attention getters and plain Jane dresses. Those we hung separate. When all was said and done I had a closet full of dresses, skirts, lingerie, nightgowns and some blouses.

She had helped me sort it nicely by short skits to mid and long. then blouses, short sleeves and long. Then by fancy and plain. The dresses too were sorted by plain to pretty on the practical side. There were a few fancy dresses then we moved to the slips. Full slips, very fancy slips, bouffant's and finally peignoirs.

With the hanger stuff done we did the shoes. In my dresser were colorful panties, half slips more bloomers and pettipants and even a few basic foundations. I wanted to try a couple of those foundations called spanks just because they looked cute and I liked the name. I had some knee high stockings and a few packages of pantyhose and that's when I asked my step mom about my first outfit and how it should look?

"Androgyny," she said and added, "that's the key in the beginning. You want to show characteristics of both sexes but lean towards the feminine. You're going to confuse most men the moment they see you, so they are going to look again for those secondary characteristics."

"What are those," I asked.

"First sex characteristics are the obvious baby making things like exaggerated hips and breast for women, say that bulge between the legs for men. Secondary characteristics are anything that doesn't have to do with reproduction but give hints like hair, Adams apple, voice, build, arms, legs, Muscles. Some people need a couple of hints, other as many as they can get," mom said and then added, “of course there are a few that will never get it.”

"So be plain," I said.

"Yes. We should find you a plain blouse, opaque, a full, but not too full skirt, also opaque, something that hangs just below the knee and in earth tones or white. Knee high socks and tennis shoes. No makeup, comb your hair and no jewelry. Above all else be yourself." my step mother said pinching my cheeks as she lifted a blouse and found a skirt.

"Got it," I said taking the two to hang on my door

"Ready for you night diaper," my step mom asked without skipping a beat and this time I was.

"I am,' I said excitedly. I had been ready since the girls had brought all of that lingerie to my room. Sally had excitedly and proudly handed me a bag asking me first if it was true what Cindy said about me wearing diapers. When I looked at Cindy with a touch of anger, she held a hand up and asked me to be patient. Then I understood because with my yes I got to see three pair of the cutest rumba panties ever. Each adorable and large enough to fit me.

I didn’t know it, but Sally had worn diapers for a long time confessing even that she liked them to Cindy's surprise and now mine. Of course she was a young girl but still she did and her mother had been especially kind in creating "very cute" for her and there they were still. Now mine.

Sally also whispered that she still liked diapers and for one or two days a month, at the start of her period, she liked to wear adult diapers. She didn’t have to but she used her period as an excuse. I loved that my own condition prompted that confession.

And there I was looking at three pair of the cutest rumba panties I'd ever seen. One pair in pink nylon over plastic pants with white gathered ruffles, white nylon over plastic panties with pink gathered ruffles and white shimmering satin on plastic panties with very generous gather satin ruffles.

I tugged the white on white satin from the drawer and sat those next to the fresh diaper. As my step mother sat on the bed. She picked them up with a touch of surprise and examined them asking where they came from and I said Sally, who I added was now one of my new benefactors.

"Well baby girl, it looks like tonight you really are my baby girl," my mom said looking inside of the panty before laying the diaper down and folding it. I didn't even slow down for the erection that popped out of my panties when I brought my nightgown up and those down. It wasn't missed by my mom as she added, "hold that down for me when I diaper you so it doesn't bite me!"

We both laughed. She was as careful as before with the Baby Eczema Cream using a lot between my testicles and things, but this time loads of baby powder as well. I'd asked for that for the smell as much as the notion. I did hold my erection down against my stomach and it remained there while she closed the diaper around me. Then the panties came on and I felt so babyish.

I stood for the fussing and my own caressing and it felt so wonderful and suddenly I was losing it. My mom was tucking the legs as she always did for that just in case wicking thing which moves the diaper a little. Meanwhile I was caressing the satin and those ruffles that came to the side seams just as the diaper moved a little over my tip. It happened then. my mom leaned back letting it happen with her arms folded while I closed my eyes biting my lip

"We're going to be taking care of that before our diapering from now on - right," my step mother warned and I nodded. I blushed a tiny bit but it was more from the pleasure I felt than the embarrassment as she let the nightgown fall over my rumba panties. I nodded yes though deciding I would "sacrifice" my dignity in the bathroom with a piece of lingerie for her sake. As if.

I climbed into bed allowing the nightgown to ride up so the satin panties could slide along the satin sheets. It felt wonderful as I tugged the nightgown down again. I fingered the wide edge of what I thought of as my baby blanket and eased it under my chin turning a little. My arm rested on my side with my hand under the hem of my nightgown fingering the ruffles and satin as I fell asleep.

SUNDAY’S CHILD

Whirlwind? If I had to find a word to fit this new world of mine that would be the word as I woke to my seventh day. Back before this began I was a normal healthy boy doing what every other boy does, then bang, I'm in the intensive wing of the hospital in agony wishing I was dead. The sunlight was streaming into my room that morning too but I didn't see it. This time I did and it woke me.

I opened my eyes, yawned, stretched, curled my toes, spread my legs and felt the diaper tug itself free within the plastic panties. This morning diaper had molded itself around me cuddling my pubic region with softness and warmth awaking me more as the movement excited me. I loved it when my erection, now with a life of it's own, grew along the silkiness of the diaper becoming harder and more sensitive.

In the stillness I reached down and caressed the satin over the warm plastic then pushed against the diaper. My erection pulsated back and I rubbed so the diaper moved over it. It was easily a morning ritual and within a few strokes I ejaculated into my diaper which unblocked the urethra allowing my urine to course it's way into the warm folds.

I lingered a moment and then rose lazily. It was Sunday and I was a princess, spoiled, meandering through her castle before a quick shower and dressing. I swept my hand over the dress and slip my mother had set aside for my little girl debut. Sally and Cindy were coming at noon bringing their favorite dolls. Sally had her's sitting around a table, Cindy was getting hers from the attic. Mom and I were going to shop for one.

I'd just started to fall asleep Saturday, I was exhausted. The week had been a whirlwind of events rift with emotions and unknown feelings. I was diving and surfacing into situations I know nothing about. I was cascading into the days pushed by an avalanche of things most boys never experience only to be carried by it into things most boys would never dare walk into. I was becoming overwhelmed and said so and my mother understood or said she did and kissed me good night.

Then suddenly the light came on and my mother's voice yelled, "you are confused because you have not played enough!"

"What," I said sleepily. I'd been sound asleep when her voice woke me. I had no idea what she was even talking about.

"You're going to have a party tomorrow," my mom said standing in the doorway.

"A party? For what," I asked ready to plead to go back to sleep.

"You're four, you'll be turning five! We'll be celebrating that turn of events," my mother said.

"I don't understand," I said.

"Honey, you came home Thursday. Tomorrow is Sunday. On Sunday it will have been four days since you began wearing girl's cloths. On Monday, your fifth day you'll be going out dressed as a girl. You precious will be having a little girl's birthday party in celebration of passing that forth day into that fifth day," my step mother said and then added, "and we'll talk more in the morning. Good night sweetheart!"

When I woke I had the strangest feeling deep down that the dream I'd had wasn't a dream. My mom actually had come to my room and spoke to me and it has so unnerved me that I rose without playing that morning. I woke to a dry diaper and left it dry as I let my nightgown fall straight before making my way to the kitchen.

"Good morning," mother said sitting over a cup of coffee. Judging by the pot she had gone through two cups which meant she'd been up for awhile.

"Good morning, So what was that all about," I asked.

"I realized that in your short struggles to define your feminine self you haven't been given the opportunity to actually experience that feminine self. I just thought it would be important that you do. So, today is the day that you do," mom said.

'How does that happen," I asked slightly excited.

"Two ways," mom said and added, "and with the help of your friends, we're going to redesign your bedroom to properly reflect who lives there and secondly you really need to have a little girl's celebratory party."

"What are we celebrating," I asked feeling my stomach flip over the possibility of wearing a party dress.

"I can see it on your face! How about the fact that you can wear a party dress," mom said laughing and adding, "actually we can use one of those pageant dresses and slips Sally donated for the party, but first we've got to figure out your colors for your room and get that done. After your girl's party I'd like to put you to bed in a girl's room."

"Mom, are we... that is, am I moving too fast," I asked suddenly worried as I added, "I'm mean it's only been a few days, right?"

"Honey, life doesn't have a speedometer. Life moves at the speed of life. If you think you're moving too fast, then you're moving too fast. If you don't want to do this - don't. The only stress you should feel is the stress an explorer feels. Anything else and it's bad and shouldn't be doing it." mom said and paused.

"It's just that I'm not sure all of a sudden," I said.

"If that's the case and you've just said as much then we need to rethink all of this and that's a good thing," mom said and then added, "tell you what, if you want, let's put a pause on all of it, slow things down a bit and in a few days we'll talk about this again. okay?"

"But what about the room," I said and added, "I like the idea of redoing the room."

"Then let's do that," mom said and added, "that's easy and can always be undone."

"And the party, can I still have a party," I asked and then added, "you know and maybe still wear the party dress?"

"Absolutely," mom said and added, "there is no reason we can't have the party as well.

"So you're okay with just doing the room and having the party then," I asked.

"Absolutely," mom said.

"And not any of the other things," I asked.

"Not another thing," mom said.

So what were the other things planned for today," I asked.

"I was going to do your room and have the party," mom said laughing.

“Thank God that’s it because otherwise we would be moving too fast,” I said and laughed.

An hour later we sat with the lady at Home is Everything and started picking out colors. The girl, Lucy, now the alter ego of Linus, was an adorable little girl of eight or thereabouts. She loved pink, more a blush we told the lady but with a touch of lavender and some touches of pastels. Mom said dad's bonus was huge and there was no reason why my room couldn't use a little of it.

We found a lamp with a little girl in a delightfully cute full shirt standing by a lamp post which was the lamp itself holding balloons in pastels that went with some cute book ends. I also found a double set of Unicorn pictures behind glass in some soft pastels and a nice throw rug that matched. There was a wall paper trim that would match all of it that would go around the edge of the ceiling once the paint dried. It would be a cute room.

On a whim we stopped at a toy store and went to the doll section and I got two dolls with dresses. One of the dolls was a baby girl, the other a little girl. The baby I name Tina, the little girl would be Tracy but I couldn't play with them till I opened the boxes at the party. We got dishes for the case and bowls for ice cream plus matching cups for juice. All of the party favors were for Barbie, but in pastels. The only thing we didn't get to go with the table cloth and napkins was the Happy Birthday sign.

Mom brought the saw horses into my room and the plastic sheets to cover every thing and I began taping stuff we didn't want painted. That's when the door bell rang. When I opened the door, and I was told to answer it by mom I was greeted by Cindy and her mother Alice, Mark and his mother Selma, Rick and Mandy and waving at the back Sally and Grace.

"What's going on," I said curious.

"Paint party," Sally yelled before anyone else could.

"No, we're having a little girl's celebratory party, remember," Mark said pushing a gift towards me as he and his mother came into the house.

"I think it's both," my mother Rose said smiling at me as I turned around at her voice.

"Yes," I said.

"Alice and Selma with me," mother Rose said pointing down the hall before adding, "Mandy and kids to the kitchen if you don't mind."

I stood there as Cindy and Mark's mother walked off with mine towards my bedroom while Cindy, Mark, Rick and Sally went off with Rick's mother to the kitchen."

"What do I do," I asked just before my mom turned into my room.

"Put your presents on the dining room table after you've covered it with the Barbie table cloth," mom said and then added, "and then come in and help finish your room so you have a place to change when the time comes."

I ran to the dining room and cleared the table and opened the table cloth. It had a giant picture of Barbie on it as I unfolded it and spread it out. The other kids, under the direction of Mandy were beginning to make a cake. I heard Sally talking about Kool Aid choices and Rick was pulling the handle on ice trays. I was getting excited.

Alice was rolling out the blush pink on the second wall with Selma walking along with a small step ladder brushing the corners in the same color. Mom had a thin strip of metal and was painting the molding around the ceiling a pastel lavender. The three had already finished the full wall and was working on the one with the window.

"Tape the window honey," mom said when I came in.

I moved the bed out a foot and taped the window after removing the adjustable shade. I covered the bed with a thin tarp and used a long tarp for the floor just as the three women started on that wall. It had taken them maybe ten minutes for the big wall. They did the second in ten and the third in five.

They finished painting the room in under 45 minutes. I could smell cake baking when I started folding the tarps. Mom unpacked the lamp with the little girl holding the balloons and my new book ends and then carefully pressed the hooks in for the Unicorn pictures. With the tape gone we put the bed back and added the pastel throw rug.

We would shop for a bed spread during the week she promised. It was already a cute bedroom and we still had the wall paper trim to add around the ceiling when the paint was set after a couple of days. I was thrilled and rushed to get the girls. That's when I allowed into the kitchen to witness the icing of my Barbie cake. Barbie went into the icebox along with the Kool Aid.

Everyone was rushing around cleaning up and in just under 70 minutes everyone had left to go get ready for my party. I looked at the presents knowing only what was in two of the boxes as mom come in from the garage and the make shift rack with my party dress in one arm, the exaggerated petticoated slip in the other.

"Yes," I said running to my room to take my clothes off for my shower.

"Oh my God, it's like living with a puppy that's hasn't eaten since yesterday," my step mother said moving to the room.

It smelled of fresh paint in spite of the fan blowing out of the window. It wasn't a bad smell and not overpowering, and it was so pretty walking into the pink it was worth it. I stripped, left my clothes neatly folded on my bed and grabbed my robe.

"Diapers or panties," I asked nervously when mom rounded the threshold.

"Which would you prefer," my mother asked.

"I was kidding. Of course panties," I said deciding I was probably pushing it by even suggesting diapers but when she had carried in the dress the short bodice screamed baby dress.

"Wait, tell me why you said diaper honey," mom asked.

"Honestly, I'm not sure? No wait, that's not exactly true. I guess it's that dress. You know, the bodice... that's what it's called I think, the chest part right, the bodice? It's so short. Baby dresses don't have chest. Just the arm part and skirts and... I guess it's the style that made me think of diapers," I said and added, "all I could think about was petticoats and ruffled panties and under those diapers? This is so embarrassing?"

"So you were thinking short bodice, short hem, lots of petticoats, ruffled panties," mom said and then added, "and that embarrassed you? Why? Honey, it's cute. What you were thinking of is cute. You don't have a background in such things and this morning, when we went shopping for dolls all you saw was cute. Okay, so be it. That's how you're going to the party."

"Wait, what," I asked.

"Go! Go take your shower then come back here and I'll help you into your diapers and baby pants and we'll cover those in your little bubble panties and dress you cute," mom said and then added, "okay?"

"Okay," I said rushing for the bathroom.

"Oh, and will you do me a little favor before you come into the bedroom and I use the baby oil and powder on you," mom said.

"I know," I said smiling.

"So cute," my mother said turning me to button the dress.

I felt cute. I was so far from being a boy I couldn't remember what it was like. I'd rushed into the shower, lathered with the Dove soap, thought about the dress and the orgasm was almost instantaneous. That would make mom happy I mused happily leaning against the shower wall till my legs strengthened again.

I powdered myself generously and could hardly contain my excitement when I met her standing by moms bed. The room, now clearly for a girl surrounded me and on the bed, laying over the changing pad, my diaper. In mom's hand one of the diaper pins, the other held in her mouth, next to her, on the nightstand the Baby Eczema Cream. I was glad I'd masturbated earlier.

I cooperate into my baby pants, the snap on pair and stood for the new nylon bubble panties with the ruffled legs. They went with my nightgown but were adorable as panties under the dress and slip. Which went on next. The short bodice of the slip matched the dress perfectly and left the hem just at the edge of the panties ruffle. The dress made me swoon until it rustled and then I sighed.

"I could never go back," I whispered as the dress noisily slid over the layers of slip. I had to hold my hands out or crush the skirts and slip as I added, "who has to stand like this but girls in dresses?"

"You'll never go back," my step mother said before adding "until then say you’ll tell me when you want to."

"Not me," I warned.

That's when the door bell went off. My step mom told me to get my lacy socks for this dress and only Mary Jane's would work and if I wanted just a hint of lipstick. We could do that in front of the girls when I came into the kitchen. I nodded my okay and rushed to get my socks on. I was desperate to show off.

I rushed to the kitchen but met everyone at the dining room bringing things from the kitchen as my step mom and the other mom's were organizing. Alice, Cindy's mom was carefully bringing in the Barbie cake and from the doorway I saw Selma, Mark's mother putting hot dogs into a pot on the stove. Mandy, Rick's mother was dumping chips into a bowl. Grace, Sally's mother was bringing in the condiments with the buns.

Then laughter from Rick, Mark and Cindy looking at something Sally was doing.

"What's going on," I asked coming over to see what was causing all of the commotion.

"You," Cindy said making room for me.

I was looking at me in an edited version of a video made of various video shorts put together under the song "I Feel Pretty". It had started with the two showing me in my nightgown then holding it up to show off the diaper and went from there in all manner of dress. I wasn't sure if I was shocked, angry or thrilled.

"Awesome," Rick said.

"Really cute," Mark added.

"Love this one," Cindy pointed out.

"That one is my favorite," Sally said and then added, "no that one."

"You make the cutest girl,' Sally noted kissing me on the cheek before adding, "happy girl day."

"Same," Mark said adding his kiss and then Rick did it and finally Cindy. I was shocked beyond words. As for the video I decided I was thrilled.

"Hot dogs are ready," mom said putting all the mom's in motion as we were ushered down in front of Barbie plates. Hot dogs, chips and Strawberry flavored Kool Aid. Food fit for a queen I decided eating daintily and as fast as I dared so I could open my two dolly boxes and the other four.

Mark's box was a shirt box and I don't know why I grabbed it first but I did. Turned out to be a really cute baby doll nightgown set. It sort of caught me off guard considering his comments about no more sleep overs and I looked at him said thanks but had a curious expression on my face.

Mom helped me pick it out," Mark said with a cautious look.

"It's really nice." I noted and meant it. The really nice thing was he had gotten me girl clothes.

It's was the same for Rick who had gotten me a first baseman's glove but with pink lacing to hold the web in. Same glove as I used when we played catch or now I had a girl's version. I too thanked him. Another gesture of acceptance I decided. We could still play catch.

Then there was Sally who I'd started looking at as my "girly friend" and true to her nature I opened her package to a pair of ruffled panties. These were seriously ruffled, perfectly ruffled panties and I wanted them on right then and there.

"I love you bunches," I said out loud before realizing I'd said it.

"Go," my step mother said. She already knew what I so desperately wanted to do and I was gone in a flash.

So were my bubble panties the instant I made it to my room. I couldn't see with all of the layers of slips and dress so I stood in front of my mirror and stepped into them. I was shaking badly trying to get them on but careful not tear them and finally got them over my shoes. I made several careful checks then a couple more to admire them and went back. Lots of smiles and giggles.

There was another video by Sally but I didn't care over this one, and posed with Cindy. She got a kiss on the cheek and then I opened Sally's gift. Like Cindy she was my Girly girl friend and just as true I had my first make up kit. Mark and Rick tried not being interested but they watched as Sally went on to explain each item.

"Pay attention... Foundation and it means what it says. Blush and ditto the meaning, Eye liner and eye shadow which leaves little doubt what they do and lip liner and lip stick which you'll have to guess at. Kidding. Mascara makes your eye lash's flutter and eye brow pencil is only useful if you pluck and you haven't plucked yet," Sally said but then added, "but no matter, because using everything makes you girly.

I did blush and so did Mark and Rick as we watched Sally put everything back into a cute Disney Princess bag in patent pink plastic. Mom started clapping causing the other moms to clap causing the kids to clap but I still had my two boxes and mom handed me the first. I had goose bumps when I tore open the first.

The sort of Betsi Wetsi look alike doll had been dressed in a disposable diaper and cute little top with it's own baby bottle, and blanket. Mom let me accessorize her with a cloth diaper and snap on plastic pants so we had something in common. I named her Tina in the store. The little girl doll was in a party dress over a petticoat and she I named Tracy.

Sally was the one that said I now had dolls for tea and to sit on my bed when I wasn't there. She also said I needed to jot their sizes down so I could get doll clothes from her collection next time I was at her house. Or better yet I could bring my dolls with me next time and have tea with her. The fact we were teens or I would soon be had no impact.

We had Barbie cake and I gave Mark and Rick hard warm hugs along with thanks and another quick peck before they left that afternoon. Mark's mother Selma and Ricks mother Mandy made it clear I was welcome no matter what and if I didn't visit they'd come and get me. Sally's mom Grace and Cindy's mom Alice left a short time later but the two girls went with me to my room.

I had whispered to Mark that I was going to wear the nightgown he'd gotten for me that night wondering what he do with that information and giggled outright making the girls ask why. I didn't say. I put the glove Rick gave me on my dresser along with my new makeup kit. Sally ran a hand over my ruffles but I was teasing when I flipped my skirts and slips up. It felt wonderful.

The paint smell was gone and I was exhausted and the girls were tired to as we hugged our good byes. I hung my dress and slip, deciding I'd sleep with Tina because she was in a diaper and kissed mom. I didn't need to change and crashed within minutes. I don't remember much about the dream I had but I was the same size as Tina and Rick was in a little girl's dress just as the Sun was coming up

MONDAY

It was going to be my first day out. The skirt my mom selected had pockets so I didn't have to carry a purse but all I needed was my wallet and a small canister of breath mints, I fingered the hair barrettes on the dresser as I passed.

Since the blouse I would wear was opaque I went to the closet for a full slip and decided on the prettiest but changing to the bouffant because of the petticoats. Then I remembered her saying keep it simple and went back to the dresser. I found an eight gore half slip someone donated and laid that on the bed with a camisole. When I dressed the slip flared when I spun around.

I wore knee high white socks and white low cut tennis shoes. The only other thing I did was comb my hair with my mom's Cantu Shea Butter hair lotion because it was so creamy and smelled wonderfully feminine. It also slicked my hair down giving me that androgynous look she suggested. When I combed my hair smooth the combined look actually offered a little more of the feminist. I looked like a cross between a young boy or girl. She'd been right.

"Wow," my step mother said coming into the kitchen to the smell of bacon. I'd started making breakfast thirty minutes before she gets up to surprise her. I'd made coffee, fried bacon and before that had done my room and dressed. I was so ready for the day as she added, "that really is a nice look for you."

I thanked her and then started serving breakfast. My goal was to head for Cindy's after 8 o'clock to hang, then call Sally maybe and take it from there. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do other than just test the waters with the girls first mostly because they were safe, then the guys because they were friends. After that I'd wing it. I felt girlish, but not female if that makes sense and I said that to my mom who seemed to understand it completely.

I did the dishes and my mom stood by the door, except it wasn't a door. It was a kind of portal to another dimension where I wasn't a boy but a sissy which in this world didn't hold a negative connotation. At least not for me. After the party I felt so liberated. Sissy was a new sex as I took the door knob and just as I turned it my mom handed me a lip balm.

"What this," I asked looking at the normalcy of it.

"Practice," she said and added, "put it in your pocket and when you eat or start to come out of the bathroom take it out and put some on your lips and then blot them. Pretend it's lipstick. Nothing like a little play to get you through the day. It's a girl thing."

I took the lid off, gently, slowly - very slowly, swiped my lips, blotted them, then let it drop back in my pocket and we hugged. It was nice. I let my eyes take the second they needed to adjust and then turned for Cindy's place.

Across the way Mrs. Robinson was just sitting her coffee on top of her car to open the door and waved like this is the way I was dressed every morning. We were perfectly normal, I waved back and walked down the sidewalk. She got into her car, backed down the driveway and drove off.

A dog barked off in the distance. A male truck drove by with a car behind it keeping pace. A horn went off, My skirt swished and my slip flowed gently over my knees back and forth with each step. It was a rhythmic kind of shift right to left - left to right, giving me great pleasure just having it on but when it moved it made me feel giddy. Only a girl would have this. I looked down at my skirt reveling over the appearance and disappearance of my feet and fighting the urge to skip. I now understood that urge.

"Hi Mrs Carson Cindy up yet," I asked more as a joke than a real question. I had knocked once and a moment later the door opened.

"She'd better be and don't you look nice. Come on in honey," Alice said opening the door even wider the instant she saw me as she added, "that's a cute look for you."

"Thank you," I answered back.

"Hey sissy," Cindy said driving down the stairs two at a time. She was in socks and skidded not a foot from where I stood bunching the throw rug against where I was standing, much to the annoyance of her mother.

"Something wrong with being ladylike," Alice asked bending to fix the carpet that Cindy tried to pull back in place with a toe. Linus, today, if you get a chance, maybe you could give my daughter here some tips?"

"I'm not much of a lady Mrs. Carson," I said smiling at the compliment anyway.

"Cute enough to be precious, but it's your manners that make you what you are sweetheart. Anyway, you two have fun, I'm going shopping," Alice said passing me for the door as she added to Cindy, "you've got your phone charged?"

"I do. Bye mom. Have fun. We'll be here doing our lady lessons," Cindy said laughing. Her mother didn't even turn around. I snickered.

"So what are lady lessons," I asked and suddenly stopped to remember Sally and said, "wait, I've got to talk with Sally right away. Can you see if she's home. No, never mind, let's just go over."

"Fair enough. Let me get my shoes," Cindy said bouncing back up the steps two at a time. Her shoes were in her hand as she came back down the same way. She was in a skirt and you could see the lacy hem of her slip about four inches up from the hem of the skirt. At the base of the steps she bent a knee and pushed a foot into her white flat, did the other and we left.

"You really do look cute. That was a great party yesterday. So, what's the lingerie list sound like and I need details and don't you dare say white," Cindy said.

"Thanks," I said about the party and then I made my lingerie list sound like an announcer on a game show as I added,

"For my first outing panties I have chosen briefs of nylon in two layers with the top a sheer. Exquisite sensations going on so I removed them immediately to insert a pad before it was too late. The sheer layer has two lacy inserts on either side giving an adorable emphasis on what's at the middle. The legs are trimmed in a delicate lace as well," I said turning full circle into a curtsey.

"More," Cindy said clapping.

"After my panties, I've chosen a delightfully full slip which although predominately white nylon and silky overall, it has a double skirt, starting at the waist: one of sheer nylon not too unlike my panties. My step mother had suggested that the slip has been designed to be worn when you're in the beginning of your period more as a precautionary layer...."

I paused pretending to swoon before adding, "while I don't have periods myself I thought it appropriate because I often suffer from periods of excitement. To complete this item it has a lacy bodice lined in a sheer with satin adjustable straps. Perfect for a sissy boy's first outing. Oh, and the skirts are 6 gore."

"How do you know about gores," Cindy said as she added, "and that's cute about you being in your excitement period."

"I looked up all the terms this morning when I was getting dressed. I was too excited to sleep so I spent the morning learning the parts of clothes. A gore my dear is a triangular piece of material or tapering material used to create a circle. The more gores the fuller the skirt. Like I said this skirt is six gores.

My panties are slippery because they are made of nylon and are measured by denier which is a unit of measurement for the fineness of silk and nylon," I said standing there swishing. My panties are silky because they have a high denier. My panties are pretty because they have lace and ruffles.

"You are too much," Cindy said and added, "what a great sissy you'll make."

"Thank you," I said.

"So, you'll be happy to know that last night after Sally and I left your party we talked and we've determined that a sissy is really a girl apprentice. You have decided you might like to be a girl and while you might not be sure you can still apprentice. So, we've chosen to apprentice you under an expert girl, or me, to learn the girl trade. At the moment you are an initiate," Cindy said.

"What's an initiate," I asked.

"An initiate is level one for a sissy. That is a boy who has chosen to become a maybe girl who is introduced to his journey woman. She in turn begins to introduce him to the mysteries of her field of activities like the shaving of legs, bubble bathing, the making of faces and painting of nails. Each of these must be passed to become a journey sissy. Once those steps are complete you can take the girl test. If you pass the girl test you can, if you chose, become a girl!

"Is there a uniform," I asked.

"Absolutely," Cindy said and added, "Look, welders have helmets, gloves and heavy aprons, carpenters have belts, so why not sissies? For sissies it's got to be a pinafore. In this case it would be a cute, adorable sleeveless apron that you wear over your dresses with ruffles. Ruffles everywhere and it ties closed with a huge and I mean humongous bow. Oh, and in your case most likely taffeta for the noise and because you're allergic to cotton."

"I love it," I said.

"We're here," Cindy said knocking on Sally's front door.

"And look at you," Grace said before turning her head to yell for Sally.

"Hi Ms Mendes," I said at the same time as Cindy. She's finishing her room. She'll be right down.

"Hey," Sally said coming down the stairs as she added, "did you tell him about our apprenticeship program?"

"I did," Cindy said.

"Mom found a really cute pattern for his pinafore and she's got the material she said he can have it. We can do the sewing at the community center but we're going to have to enroll in the night class. It's Tuesday and Thursday. Two hours. Is that okay," Sally asked and added, "Going to take two weeks.

"I'm in," I said and then I told her about the rumba panties and how well they fit and thanked her again. Sally blushed because she said she was like nine then. Then she stopped and snapped her fingers and said "wait" and ran back up the steps.

Sally came running back down with what I thought was a pastel pink flag till I realized it was actually a kind of stylized diaper of some sort. It was contoured with cutouts for the legs but the front and back edges had elastics. Along both sides and around the leg opening were lace. When she got close you could see that it was layers. There was a sheer layer over satin and it was thick.

"For the record, I had nothing whatsoever to do with that," Grace said walking past and holding a hand up. She passed and disappeared into the kitchen.

"What is that," I asked.

"It's your play diaper," Sally said and added, "I made it last night. It's your welcome to our sissy apprenticeship program diaper. It's got foam in the middle. Very thick and spongy. You can wear this with your rumba panties. Even thought I'm not actually a sissy, I've got one just like it. Love the feel."

"Wait, you still wear diapers," I asked shocked, then caught myself and said, "thanks."

I had about a hundred questions. Like for instance did her mom know? Did she have to wear diapers for real still and if so was this for pleasure? And what the hell was going on and I took the diaper and was so thankful for the pad I was wearing.

"Come on, you can see it while I show you my baby dresses... I mean your baby dresses," Sally said turning to walk towards her room.

"Baby dresses," I asked following her like a puppy.

"Baby dresses," Sally said and added, "I sort of got use to the diapers at first during my treatments after my surgery. Then I kind of got dependent on them, then I just sort of liked them and I guess you could say I got hooked. It got to be a fetish, like the one you've got or will have."

"You say that like it's nothing," I said amazed at how comfortable she was talking about it.

"Can't not be. I was in diapers way past the point when I should have been and was just starting to... you know get those feelings down there when I'd get stimulated and getting diapered was stimulating. Pretty soon I'm doing more stimulating. Lots of stimulation with an object is, by definition, a fetish," Sally said and added, "trust me, I do lots of stimulation.

"Okay then," I said.

"Rick doesn't think he'll get hung up on them but he will," Sally said and then added, "oh, back to those baby dresses because I found the box of baby dresses that mom made that we were going to bring over. Really cute."

"Wait a second, did you just say Rick and diapers in the same sentence," I asked.

"Yes, and I wasn't suppose to so before we go any further you've got to swear you won't say anything. He made me promise but I kept telling him to tell you, but he wouldn't. I think it's because he just plays in them and thinks you'd laugh," Sally said.

"What do you mean," I asked, and added, "when you say play?"

"It's my fault okay. I mean I'm the one that got him into them. Of course they were mine and we were up in my room and... you know, petting and PETTING and he sort of starting kissing and nursing on a breast and I said no. Mom was shopping and I thought I'd sort of turn him off a little," Sally said.

"How," I asked.

"Well, he kept begging to... you know, nurse, and then I got the idea and said if he was going to nurse me like a damn baby then he had to dress like a baby and well.... he said okay kinda," Sally said.

"What do you mean okay kinda, Sally," Cindy asked.

"You know Cindy? It's like when they get... when they get that way and can't say no kinda way," Sally said.

"I know," Cindy said looking at me then forming her hand which wasn't hard to understand.

"So I let go of him and then I pinned him into one of my diapers, put him into my plastic panties and let him go at my breast while I diddled with him in my diaper and baby pants."

"So it was just that one time," Cindy asked hungrily.

"Are you kidding," Sally said laughing

"It's mostly every night that he can sneak into my room. Comes in, takes his stuff off, lays on the floor, gets into his diapers and I diddle while he nurses, then he sneaks back home," Sally said.

"I'll be darn," I said.

"No kidding," Cindy said.

"You guys aren't going to say anything right," Sally asked.

"Not a word," I said and Cindy made the same promise right before I asked in a kind of desperate voice to now see those baby dresses. I was no longer a guy alone.

"When I first got sick and had to start wearing diapers I was stuck staying in my room so I would play with my dolls pretending to have tea parties. Those three dolls sitting there mostly which was sort of the inspiration for the dresses mom made," Sally said.

"All three," I asked.

"All three," Sally said and added, "she sewed the first so I'd match the dolls when we had tea. She made another, then another till I had four to match all three but one extra that was special just for me."

"Wow," I said enviously and very excited.

"I know right," Sally said and then added, "I'd forgotten where they were till we found them last night when I was sewing your play diaper and mom remembered the box. They're yours if you want them?"

"If I want them," I said lifting one of the four dresses to hold against me as I stepped in front of the mirror.

I looked at the doll sitting at the little table trying to imagine that dress five times bigger then looked at the one I was holding. They were identical. Like a dress with puffy sleeves and no waist. It was a classic baby dress. Full skirt, lots of gathering, ruffles, lots of lace. It was made for diapers, and ruffled panties.

The material was like a chiffon, airy, silky over nylon. Like a cross between a dress and a baby doll. And there were four of them. Pink, white, powder blue and a pastel yellow. The diaper was pink on one side and white on the other. I was looking at the dolls and then saw Sally looking at me and she smiled.

"I know, the dresses need bonnets like the dolls have. That would be a great project when you start the sewing class. Mom's got the pattern and there is a slip pattern to those doll dresses and you should make matching play diapers for each one as well."

"I'm going to," I said thinking exactly that as I added, "you are so generous."

"Now if we could only get your friend into something like that," Sally said.

"Sounds like you've had pretty good luck at getting him to do what you want already," Cindy said.

"True," Sally said smiling, but it takes a lot of slow agonizing teasing and sometimes if I diddle too long he looses it too soon."

We all started laughing just as Sally opened her nightstand and began sorting through a collection of pacifiers before tugging on out. It was a pastel pink with a ribbon but they all seemed to be attached to ribbons as she allowed a second still clinging to fall back into the drawer.

"Here," she said handing me the pacifier.

"Thank you," I said and added, "so full of surprises."

"Have those always been there," Cindy asked in her own surprise.

"Yes? I thought you knew," Sally said,

"Been walking around you this whole time with my eyes closed I guess, Cindy said.

"It's okay," Sally said and then added, "you do realize that both Mark and Rick are running around trying to find dresses to wear. I mean not Rick because he's pretty much found one although he's made me swear not to tell you about it yet. I don't know about Mark but have you guys noticed how truly small he really is?"

"Like a petite kind of small," Cindy said.

"Exactly," Sally said and added, "size 6 - 7 for diapers easy which means he could also fit into any single tape diaper made for toddlers. Imagine being that cute and small enough to wear single tape diapers."

"Are you serious," Cindy asked.

"Yes," Sally said and then noted, "we got to talking not too long after you happened and I had asked him about his waist size and later I looked it up and believe it or not the guy can easily fit a 3T diaper. That's a thee year old toddler for the record. That's a cute fluffy Pampers or Huggies diaper between his legs under a dress that could fit a seven year old. He could run around like a girl in the second grade and in diapers no less. Who couldn't love that."

"Does he know that," Cindy asked.

"I don't know," Sally said in frustration and added, "and if I had my way he would and it wouldn't take very long either! Sorry, just kidding. I'm still working on Rick."

"I need to take these home," I said and added, "and change."

Both girls laughed.

"Stop that," I warned.

We walked into my house and found more dresses and a few more pieces of lingerie sitting in the living room with my step mother smiling. Then she saw the dresses. She put her hands over her mouth at the baby dresses when I held those up and shook her head over the diaper.

"From Sally," I said.

I said I was going to use one for Halloween to soften the impact it might have, but I'm not sure she believed me. She may have been looking at the girl's faces when I said it. Sally and Cindy were both smiling.

"Kelly's Five and Dime sent you a $50 dollar gift card for their makeup and lingerie counters," my step mother said handing me the short typed letter and check that read "store credit" on it.

I had no idea what that would buy, but all three said we could do a shopping day and spend it on makeup. I also got a box of purses from a woman who was doing spring cleaning. My mom said I should use a back pack for a short time, then go to an actual purse.

I told mom about the sewing class and that I was going to make a pinafore with Sally. I didn't tell her about me being an apprentice sissy. Cindy had no desire to sit and sew something so complicated but Sally did.

My mom said dad had sent a bonus check that was twice what it normally was a second time so money wasn't going to be an issue for the rest of the year which made her happy and took some of the pressure off her pocket book She said dad got her lengthy Email about my "condition" and had laughed about the lingerie. I was a little shocked he took it so easy.

Meanwhile there was literally no room left in my closet so I either had to start sorting and exchanging things or we would need a cabinet to hold the extra. Of course I wanted the cabinet. My mom and I went out in the garage and measured the wall space for a possible storage unit and maybe dress bags. She reminded me that there was still Winter and jackets.

Then I remembered that Kelly's Five and Dime had petticoats... I looked at mom, repeated what I'd thought and she shook her head, grabbed her purse, motioned to the girls to follow if they wanted and mumbled something about getting two cabinets.. We saw Rick and Mark walking together going somewhere and everyone waved at each other as we headed into town.

The rack with petticoats was scrumptious, made even better since I could stand with the my mom, Sally and Cindy and touch the fabrics, pull them out or lift one to admire. I got looks, some curious, some confused, a couple most likely not approving but they were the minorities and the owner Mrs. Kelly was thrilled that I was there.

I was a kind of celebrity and she showed me the flyer about the upcoming Wear A Dress Day telling me her son was going. She pointed to him. I looked over at the counter with the register where he was and he dropped his gaze.

He would definitely be a cute girl and it was clear he had an understanding mother and was I envious of his position considering what he got to start out with. I took a chance, pointed to the petticoat I was holding and then at him just to see how he would react and he nodded and shrugged. Okay, that was telling.

I got the 1950's retro crinoline in pink and a Puddle Skirt just for fun because it was made of felt and had a 45 record on it. My mom got her own version and said we could find a venue to go together dressed the same.

We needed pink sweaters and saddle shoes. and I thought about a nice full slip and acetate panties with nylon gussets. and a garter belt. When my mom said I didn't need a garter belt with bobby sox I said I'd just wear the garter for the heck of it and got another head shake.

There would be more head shakes beginning when I made everyone stay out of my room. First I wore a fresh pair of plastic panties. That was a whispered suggested from Sally when she found a moment on how to wear the satin diaper but not before a little dab of baby lotion.

There was an OH MY GOD moment when I moved in the baby pants and had to slow down to a "hardly move" just to do anything. Next was the satin diaper and that's when I gave up. I had just pinned the second diaper pin closed when I couldn't hold back.

I used a couple of baby wipes to clean myself and added another dab of baby lotion and started over. Got to the pink ruffled panties safely this time then finally the pink version of the baby dresses. I don't know how long I'd taken but Mark and Rick were just sitting when I came out to show off.

Sally had given me the Shirley Temple wig and I'd put on the ruffled socks and patent leather Mary Jane shoes and if I could have I would have come out singing and tap dancing "Good Ship Lollipop". I'm not kidding every mouth was open. Even mine because as I started faking the dancing my erection had started coming back.

"What? All I did was add a little blush," I said.

Mark was the first to say anything and that turned out to be a "wow" which I thanked him for. Rick was clearly in love with the play diaper notion but I was guessing or maybe projecting. Sally said she missed her baby dresses and would have to make another and I noticed when she said maybe two it brought a blush to Rick's face. He'd like it I thought.

Rick would very much like the baby pants baby lotion thing, and that was for sure I noticed with a couple of short moves. Cindy said she was in love all over again and this time with a dolly - another thank you and my mom was trying to figure out how she was going to explain all this to my dad.

I was lifting my dress and showing my backside and enjoying the whole thing immensely when the urge to let loose came again. I sat almost too quickly and faked a sort of out-of-breath-situation, but it worked as the moment passed. That was the stuff that fetishes are made from I thought to myself. I whispered for a clean up in the panty isle. Someone asked what and I said never mind, just thinking out loud..

Turns out the boys had been walking into town to finish their flyers that Rick's mom Mandy Anderson and Sally's mom Grace had put together for the Wear A Dress Day. I asked Rick what kind of dress he decided on and it was none of my business and Mark said he was going as a little girl.

Mark admitting he was going to dress as a little girl blew me away and I'm sure it got Sally and Cindy's attention as well because we had just talked about his diaper sizes. He even admitted he was small enough that a neighbor was going to help. I was dying to ask more about his neighbor but didn't dare. Cindy and Sally shared a look then back at me. Oh to be fly on that wall.

TUESDAY

Mom was across town at a friends and I was in my baby dress, formally one of Sally's, suitably diapered, pacifier in my mouth, and playing with Tina my doll baby. I was diapering her imagining she was me. Mom had looked in to tell me she was going, shook her head, smiled and said if she wasn't back there was money for my new sewing class. She asked me if I was going to change?

Sally and her mom met at my house and we drove to the community center. I wore a white blouse, long polyester skirt that buttoned down the front with belt loops, over a long petticoat of chiffon in two layers. The outside layer had lace. I loved it. I wore a camisole with lace straps that was semi opaque gaining a little confidence to do more.

I used blush, a light, very light shade of pink lipstick and a soft pastel blue eye shadow. My hair was just long enough to use a hot iron on and lowered the heat so I had soft waves. My part with bangs hinted at girl, but I put a period at the end of that question with two really cute barrettes. There were looks some longer than normal but none that lasted.

I had my bag with the pattern for my pinafore and taffeta material for my first project. I was going to put a patch on with the word "Initiate". There would be fewer questions that with sissy we decided. I was in my ninth day and there was no doubt where I was in this.

I knew I wasn't a transsexual or at I didn't see myself losing my penis over this so that left me transgendered. or gender fluid. I liked girls, mostly and I only said that because I had never seen a boy I wanted to have sex with - yet. Transgendered didn't hold much of a definition so I more or less ignored it but when one of the women asked she was kind and curious.

"May I ask you something personal honey," the elderly woman said as we laid out patterns with the instructor's guidance.

"Of course," I answered knowing full well what the question was going to be.

"Why do you dress like a girl dear," she asked cutting our her pattern. The other women, while appearing indifferent had their radars tightly tuned to my answer as did Sally.

"I have allergies," I answered and added, "cotton."

"But why dresses," the woman asked.

"To hide the slips and panties," I said and added, "my mother insisted. She said it would look too odd going out in just panties and slips."

"Yes, of course," the woman said and went back to her pattern. The others did as well. There were no other questions.

It all seemed so logical even to me when I said it. I had allergies. Cotton. Nearly everything was made of cotton. Except ladies undies. They didn't make lingerie for men. They didn't make men's clothing to wear over women's lingerie. I know you're going to point to pant liners and such but I'm talking about slips. If you were going to wear women's slips you must wear women's dresses - simple.

The rest just had to happen, there was no other choice. You put on panties and a slip follows then a dress. From there nylon stockings and shoes. Pretty soon you're coloring your face and doing your nails and hair. No pockets so you grab a purse. You head for the door and first thing you notice is walking.

You may step in here and want to say something intellectual but don't bother. You're a guy, you put on panties and a slip and walk and then we'll talk about defining gender stuff. Meanwhile go get a pad and tape it in your panties like I did. You're an adult, you lay over a diaper while someone fingers in a little dab of cream in your folds and you tell me how mature you feel.

So there I am cutting out my taffeta over the pattern I've pinned it to and there is a lot of chatting about this and that and the night ends and Sally's mom drives me home. I'm soaked but the pad has done it's job and I shower after kissing mom. I tell her if it's okay I diaper myself and she's a little surprised, maybe a little sad but yes, it's okay.

I lay over the diaper nursing the pacifier before tugging it between my legs. I do the obligated folds with my Baby Eczema Cream and then add a dab of baby lotion to my tip for the pleasure I'm about to bring to myself. The nightgown is the one Mark bought me and it's high enough to be out of the way as I glide down and then up again.

I bring the diaper over and let it rest on top as the first pulse hits. I stop nursing and bite down as I arch my back to the pleasure that locks my legs and curls my toes enough to gently squeeze a grunt from me. Such a good girl I muse as I let everything go and begin to nurse again.

A baby wipe freshens what it can and I bring the diapers sides together and pin them closed. My feet slip happily into the cutest ruffled panties ever made. I fuse with those, then my nightgown and wonder again if Mark is being babied by his neighbor as I reach for my doll. I see Rick in my minds eye nursing Sally and wish I was nursing Cindy as the nipple of my pacifier transforms.

Wednesday flowed into Thursday and the pinafore was pinned into shape and tacked. Sally looked very guilty when I asked how Rick was doing and when I gave her a curious look she said there had been developments and she didn't want to talk about it. I was curiously quiet around Cindy and she was concerned but I couldn't tell her why and my mother was watching me intently.

I'd come home with a really cute plum nail polish that the girl said would go with the skirt I was wearing and took out a new file to shape my nails before painting them. Mom watched in fascination and sat and did her's with the same color. I said I had gone for a walk, ended up on main, turned into the beauty shop and was looking for a color.

AUGUEST

June rolled into July and moved slowly into August when mom sat down and asked how I was going back to school? Ms. Albright had already met the girl part back in June with the Dress Drive and she firmly believed I was transitioning to female. If I did nothing I could go to school as a girl easily or at least legally with little to do but dress.

There were no medical or physical requirements other than a doctors certification substantiating my claims. I didn't need any medical or physical changes. I might of even had difficulty doing so till my 18 birthday which was the legal age of consent. All I really had to do was have Dr. Baker write out a prescription to allow me to wear dresses.

It wasn't going to be easy, but it wasn't gong to be insurmountable either. There were enough rumors that the normal bullies were already aware and lining up but outgunned 4 to 1 by those supporting me. Mom and I decided I would actually have to work harder to go back as a boy and I didn't want to give up the dresses.

The logistics of becoming a girl were well past the initial difficulties and worked on schemes for the other little things. I really wasn't transitioning so I didn't want to push the bathroom issue so I decided on diapers under a "medical reason". Truth is I liked wearing diapers and I found a cute back pack that served nicely a combination book bag and diaper bag..

Over the next couple of weeks mom and I sampled a few of the disposables that used pulp fillings. They were slightly expensive mentioning that to Sally's mom Grace. Grace showed me how a custom fitted snap on cloth diaper slipped into a plastic pant would be just as easy and convenient. I spent the next three days wearing day diapers that she fashion as test and they worked perfectly.

Mom and I worked on a kind of look that would help me define an androgynous gender and visited the beauty parlor. I got a curler set and a lesson on how to use it. My hair was down to my shoulders and very manageable and electrolyses had taken care of my chin and upper lip nicely. Depilation took care of the rest and it seemed like each time I did it there was less to do.

I was shocked to learn I wasn't the only one searching for a new path. Mark had met us that Saturday before school was to start and announced that he had tried out and been picked for the schools varsity cheer leading squad. He'd be one of the smallest and I could imagine him in a little skirt over panties but I didn't say that.

I did find out through Cindy who knew a girl name Mandy that it was her she and her mother having some sort of affair with Mark. There were no details but Mandy was a brut of a girl and we were positive there was some sort of sadomasochism involved. Mandy's mother had been a wrestling champion years before and Mandy herself was always lettering in something strenuous.

Cindy said she believed Mark was Mandy's little girl in some bizarre way but didn't know how to pursue it. I decided if that were true it was most likely beneficial for both and there was no need to pursue it. Cindy said I was mostly likely right but it was driving her crazy anyway. Me too but I didn't show it. It was funny because the notion of Mark as a little girl was the first time I had any sexual feelings over any other guy ever. I kept that to myself.

Our school went from Kindergarten to Twelfth grade sometimes combining classes to gather enough students to teach. We were not that big so rumors didn't take long to circulate and I was the first rumor to start the circle but I'd been spun a few times over the Summer so I was almost old news.

Rick was a year older than me and already being eyed for Freshman football next year, and could hold his own with a lot of high school kids so walking on the bus with him was a good thing. Sally, slightly taller than Rick walking next with Cindy behind Mark who was behind me was like a team. We were formidable. There was no single person who wanted to take up the issue of a guy in a dress. The ride in was anticlimactic.

I wore my new snap on diaper, snap on baby pants under pull on panties in two layers treated extensively with lace. I'd learned to sew fairly well and moved quickly into lingerie fabrics for my own pleasures right after I did my Sissy Initiate Pinafore. My logic, the way I explained it to my sewing teacher was if you're going to be a girl be as frilly as you can be. If it had an edge, it lace or ruffles along it.

So did my new baby pants. I'd learned to make my own rumba panties and did making a couple that I could snap on when I was changing in school. I sewed what I called a pocket pack in my diaper bag part that was a lift out "diaper pail" that could hold three of my wet diapers.

I had also learned to sew my own diapers and had added a shear layer of rip stop nylon on the inside. I justified it as a anti chafe layer but in reality it was for the rubbing. You can trust me when I say that going through a school day wearing nylon with the shiny side in really shortens the day. I also liked taffeta and had five school skirts lined in it. At first I reasoned it to dampen the possible noise disposable diapers might make but then I discovered I just liked the swishy sound.

I wasn't the only one that liked swishy sounds either but for girls in general that would almost be normal considering how many wedding and prom dresses swished. But I'm not talking about a swishy kind of girl, I'm talking about Mandy Clearwater of sadomasochism fame. The same girl who, rumor had it, was turning Mark into some kind of little girl.

"Hey," Mandy said by way of an introduction halfway between the school building and bus..

"Hey," I said back. From a distance Mandy was big. Up close she was a giant.

"Can you stay back and maybe ride home with my mom and me," Mandy asked nodding in the direction of her mother. I turned in that direction and a women waved. I waved back with Mandy. I didn't see why not. and waved a second time to Sally and Cindy standing just outside the bus door. Mark was no where to be seen and Rick was already on the bus.

"So what's up," I asked walking towards Mandy's mother's car.

I met Margaret Clearwater then and discovered in spite of their intimidating looks they were far from it. Margaret was very admiring, that was her word, telling me she wished more men had my courage, her word as well. I said thanks and was shocked to discover they were pretty well versed on me when the next question was why did I prefer cloth and not disposable diapers?

It wasn't did I wear diapers but why cloth? Tough denying a something when you've been taken so far past it. I explain the original rational then the latest. One medical at first the other simply economics. Then my question: why? Things got a little hazy for the next few blocks...

"It's my little girl, she wants cloth, I like her in disposables," Mandy said and before I could discuss that statement Mandy's mother added, "hate doing laundry and she's going though 4-5 diapers a day when she's wearing them."

"Tough one," I said trying to find a middle ground. On the one hand the whole argument for disposables was disposable. Soil them and dump them. For women like Margaret who hated doing laundry disposables were the answer. On the other hand you had a child that hated disposable diapers and wanted to wear cloth.

"Why does she want to wear cloth diapers," I asked.

"Because you're wearing clothe diapers," Mandy said and added, "you're kind of her idle. Can't talk her out of it either."

It hit me then right square between the eyes.

"Wait, are we talking about Mark? Mark Ricks? Mark Ricks is your little girl?

"Yes? I thought you knew that," Mandy said and then suddenly began laughing as she added, "you didn't know. Oh wow. So he has never talked about me? About us? Ever?"

"Never," I said. There were rumors but just rumors. Aside from those nothing," I said.

"Want to meet her," Mandy said.

"Can I," I asked.

"Of course," Mandy said and added, "she rushes home every day so she's ready by the time I get home from school.

"Rushes home to do what," I asked seriously curious.

"I've got a play room. Crib, play pen, high chair, changing table. It's a cute baby's room for a little girl. Mark's room. All kinds of cloths, accessories and of course diapers. He rushes there when school lets out, lets himself in, changes and I usually find him in the play pen.

"Mark Ricks," I said.

"One and the same. Also known as Skittle Butt because she loves Skittles.

"So when we get there, he's dressed," I asked.

"She'll be in a diaper, disposable. Covered in ruffled panties. Cute little play dress over a slip. Se's got several She'll be just finishing a baby bottle of juice. I keep several in the refrigerator for her. She'll be wet or about to wet. I get her, I like to change her, diddle with her and then feed her. I live giving her a bath, dress her let her nurse me while I diddle with her again, and then let her get back into her boy clothes and go home," Mandy said and added, "ff it's a school night. Otherwise she sleeps with me."

"Think you can talk her into staying with the disposables," Margaret asked turning back from the wheel.

"Actually I'm wondering if you might not be better off just replacing her with someone," I said and then added with a laugh, "like me."

"You're too big," Mandy said.

"Kidding," Of course I can talk to her." I said.

You know people most of their lives. You hang with guys, talk, play, step in and out of their lives for years and think because you do that you know them. You don't. I did, but standing next to Mandy looking down at Mark or little Skittle Butt clearly I didn't know him at all.

It was pretty obvious by the look on his face he wasn't too keen on being known now either. Yet in spite of the apprehension on his face I think I saw a little relief as well. For my part I was in love. I know, yell gay, and if that makes me so then make it so. You just had to be here to see it. Seriously.

I'm small and not bad looking as a girl and getting better every day but Mark? Mark is a whole new thing. I was looking down as his chubby legs with the fleshy part erupting from disposable diapers meant for babies, toddlers of all things. He was on his side cuddling a plushy doll with a baby's bottle half gone still nursing with his eyes closed. His boy hair under a really cute baby's bonnet tied into a bow under his chin.

And that dress could have been on a five year old in any school yard in America. Mandy whispered that she had gotten the dress from the catalog store, like the others and showed me the others. We had walked into that play room first and I was so jealous of Mark I wanted to yell at him to "grow up" over this diaper thing. He was to die for and no wonder Mandy was so in love with him.

His little lavender nylon and taffeta dress was gathering just a little to show a lot of his panties and his panties were pulled up tight enough to show off his diaper and I envied Mandy the notion of putting her hand over his diaper to feel it grow warmer. Which I might add was exactly what was happening to my diaper as I stood there looking at one of my best friends.

"Hi Mark," I said when he opened his eyes and took on that panicked look.

"She's not suppose to talk. Babies can't talk," Mandy said bending down to first remove the baby bottle before picking Mark up from the play pen. Mark rose in her arms then settled against her shoulder with his white baby shoes dangling just below Mandy's waist. Mandy was a big girl being a mommy, Mark was a small boy being a little girl and it was working.

"So you'd give all of this up just to wear cloth diapers," I asked as Mandy started to un taped his wet diaper.

"You can talk," Mandy said.

"I want to wear cloth diapers like you do," Mark said.

"Margaret doesn't like to wash dirty diapers. Neither does Mandy. Seriously, to be where you are I'd wear disposables in a heart beat. I mean look at you getting your diaper changed, baby wipes, powder and I'm told there is a lot of diddling," I said looking at his erection just before Mandy cupped it.

If Mark had intended to answer he lost it. Mandy continued with her hand resting over Mark's penis but gently forced a baby's pacifier into Mark's mouth with the other hand. With that done Mandy massaged Mark in a circular motion till it was obvious he was ejaculating. Mandy's eyes were closed as were Mark's so I closed mine. I was wondering if they minded a threesome in the future as I pressed against my own diaper.

"So I'll ask that question again," I said as Mark was being taped into a fresh diaper. Mandy had wiped him clean after her hand. Powdered him nearly white and slipped a very fluffy disposable under him, as I added, "you'd give all of this up?"

"Not really," Mark said and then looking at Mandy asked, "can Linus come over sometimes to play?

"Would you mind getting your diaper changed or getting fed a baby's bottle," Mandy asked and then said, "you'd have to bring your own disposables, but I've got extra baby bottles?"

"What time tomorrow," I said laughing.

Of course I did go over and play a couple of times but Mandy was a one baby diddler and I was fine with that. Mark and I diddled with ourselves in the play pen and once in the crib we switched so we were facing head to toe and got each other off doing diaper rubs while nursing our baby bottles - that was nice. Odd, no doubt of that, but nice.

And school settled in.

Did I tell you about Rick? See, that's the thing, all my friends are running along on two separate planes making me suspect it's the same for the entire world. There is the normal plane or perfectly normal level of existence that we see. The rules are the same for all of us and for the most part we think everyone is following them and we're hoping everything believes we are too.

Then there is that odd plane, that secret plane, then one I was discovering. The one I found Sally living around and then Mark that day laying in the play pen. There was a hint of it with Rick but Sally hadn't been very clear on what his existence was other than something about getting him into a diaper because he wanted to nurse on her. Maybe it was just teasing and sex.

That's fair enough and maybe not so odd. Certainly not something I should be judging considering all the steps I'd taken out of the ordinary. Except it was Rick himself confirming that and that confirmation was making me wonder about me? Who was I? Was all of this already happening or was I somehow the cause?

I kept thinking about that refrigerator light thing... was it always on or did it come on when the door opened, and how could you know until you opened the door? So was Rick always into the diaper fetish and how would I have known without risking the question and the question risked breaching that never breached plane of existence. The thing is had I not been into my thing I wouldn't have noticed his thing.

"Can I talk to you," Rick asked jogging up to me not too unlike Mandy had just a few weeks before. I was getting a little gun shy with that phrase. It meant depth, secrets, confidences, sharing. It also meant I might now if my best friend was still wearing diapers and nursing off his girlfriends breast. Now that was kind of cool. Another sort of baby.

Had to be the water I thought with a laugh. Me, Mark and Rick... all into diapers. Mark and I into dresses and diapers. Sally into diapers but already into dresses but she had started in dresses. That left Cindy. What the hell was Cindy into I mused because I hadn't seen any other plane and I was sure she had one. So far everyone did and Rick, meanwhile wanted to talk.

"Hey, what's up," I asked.

"Did you... I mean when you... Have you...." Rick started a few times but it wasn't going well and I decided to help.

"Diapers or dresses," I asked.

"Diapers? But how did you know," Rick said looking at me in astonishment. I felt so superior, but couldn't hold a straight face and lost it. I said I found out by accident and swore an oath to keep it secret and had. The look of his face was relief.

"You wear them right," he asked.

"Morning, noon and night," I said and before he could ask I added, "and no, it's not because I have to but because I like to. Same as Mark. Why?"

"You just answered it," Rick said and added, "sort of got into them and sort of like them and was wondering if I'm weird?"

"Okay, first of all you are very weird, let's get that out of the way but that's you. As for being weird for wearing diapers? Here's what I know about that so far... If you know someone doing the same thing you're doing it's not weird. If you know someone doing something you've never done, they are weird. If you're doing something no on else has ever done you are weird." I said and added, "and that's that. Mark wears diapers, I wear diapers and Sally wears diapers and you wear diapers so no, wearing diapers is not weird.

"That's a relief," Rick said.

"Not so fast," I said and then added, "do you wear dresses?"

"No," he said quickly.

"Then you are weird," I said.

"I'm a guy," Rick said and then added, "how can a guy be weird because he doesn't wear dresses?"

"What did I just say about who is and who isn't weird," I said and added, "look, I wear dresses, Mark wears dresses, but you don't wear dresses? Of the three guys in our group you're the only one that doesn't wear dresses, ergo you're weird. Now then, if you want to be normal again, like the rest of your friends, go diaper yourself and get into a dress."

"And he says I'm weird," Rick said laughing.

"You're welcome," I said. as he moved to hug me.

OCTOBER

September flowed more or less uneventful into the early part of October with many of the days similar but then advertisements for Halloween began showing up. So much was already happening in what we now called our underground that great plans were being made for our first major event to be public.

It was about here that I met Bruce, and coincidently Cindy introduced me to Ernie which was by way of his girlfriend Susan. Rick, Sally and I had just happened into the grand opening of a costume shop opened the first day. It's one of those places that pops up in vacant stores for the month then disappears with the end of Halloween.

Sally and I had convinced Rick to dress up nearly like Sally and it was going to be adorable. He had already gotten girl shoes. White flats like Sally's at The Shoe Source for next to nothing and we had just found their ideal matching dresses.

These were really cute little girl dresses made of that really inexpensive, but very erotic acetate satin like taffeta fabric that is incredibly silky to the touch. It was rustle which Sally and I loved and Rick hated. Sally would wear a powder blue XXL and Rick would go out in an XL in bubble gum pink.

The dresses came with bows and tied in the back but I said I'd sew buttons on each to make them a little less cheap looking. I was also going to removed the cheaper and scratchier lace and add a baby blanket ruffled satin strip under a wide lace around the hem to make them more sissy. Both were wearing pull up diapers under ruffled plastic lined panties.

Rick had to shave his legs and would need a bubble bath and shower for the shaving. I made Rick and Sally a simple sheath slip "to fit" of nylon edged in lace just so the dress would slid over it. That was Sally's idea and I knew when Rick tried it on it was a winner. Can't have enough slid. Anyway, I'm forgetting about Bruce.

I had fully transformed leaving very little of the boy remaining by September and few at school were remembering me as a boy any more. I was also experimenting with colorful strands of hair and little girlish bits of clothing and accessories. I had gotten use to wearing cute little perky skirts on occasion that were short but not too short and read that bloomers left to peek made them erotic even when they were really not.

So there I am at the Halloween store looking through the XL sizes of little girl dresses for an XXL for Sally. I'm in a pink silk skirt over a short black petticoat on top of pink bloomers which is kind of a new look. These were two layer bloomers with the top a sheer and bottom in satin sewn with a ruffling at the bottom. It was a "teasing look" that ruffle because it peeked from the edge of the slip and skirt.

I'm mentioning all of this because that's where I caught Bruce's eyes when I caught Bruce looking. It really warmed my heart and other parts and the funny part was his mother noticed and gave him a nudge. Double whammy. Bruce got his third whammy when I turned with the little girl's dress for Sally, and sort of on purpose held it just right making it clear it would fit him.

So there is Rick holding his dress against himself not paying any attention to anyone, and me holding the powder blue dress meant for Sally now for Bruce and Bruce's mother looking at both boys and me. I was doing it for the humor but Bruce's mom grabbed hold of the moment instantly.

"Look at that. You said you were just curious, and there it is, the perfect dress. Even better that would be so adorable on you and the size looks like it might even fit," his mother said.

I'm watching Bruce and his face went from ghost white to fire engine red in an instant. I'm not kidding, if you had paper and put it anywhere near Bruce's face it would have ignited. It was such a cute moment. Another closet opened and a light turned on I thought to myself.

I knew Bruce was in agony and my heart went out to him suddenly so I dared a hand. He was easily the same size as Rick maybe little smaller so an XL would suit him and I said so. I also said this dress was for Sally who was just a few feet away poking around at fake blood. But there was Bruce.

"We're all getting together some of us dressing as babies some as little girls to go out, want to join us," I asked. As soon as I spoke Bruce's bubble popped and his mother's grin grew from hopeful to slightly wicked. Honestly I'm not sure but the twist at the ends got funny. She thought I was a girl then realized I wasn't and I suspect she saw something that satisfied her.

"I don't know," Bruce said and then suddenly Rick stopped fiddling with his dress and noticed the world again.

"Hey Bruce, you wearing a dress too," Rick asked.

"Hey Rick? I guess," Bruce said.

"We thought it would be good if he had at least one of his own," his mother said sarcastically, and then it seemed that she thought better of her remark and added, "instead of wearing something of mine for Halloween. So what size would you recommend honey?"

I told her to get one the same size as Rick's, an XL and she made Bruce pick it. She also made him put the powder blue that he grabbed back and take up a pink. I pulled a pen and paper from my bag and wrote my address down and the time we were meeting and if she wanted she could drop Bruce off early for snacks. She was going to.

They moved off to find him a wig. They were looking at the braided with bows when we left the store and from there they were headed for The Shoe Source where Rick Got his flats. I had stepped away and suggested to Bruce's mother, Helen, that she think about a slip because the dress was only slightly opaque. She said thank you and had already decided on one to go with "his panties".

I lift it alone and walked away. My guess was that those panties she was talking about were not his first pair, nor his in the beginning. Poor Bruce I thought and then realized optimistically I'd just found another member of this unnamed group or maybe he was another apprentice sissy. At the least I'd discovered someone who had the misfortune of being discovered.

"So where do you know Bruce from," I asked Rick as we walked home.

"He plays on the junior baseball team," Rick said and added that he might go out for wrestling next year. I almost joked and asked girls or boys team but didn't. I was thinking Bruce needed a friend. I was also wondering what Bruce's mom thought about me?

I was wearing a white bandana of nylon with my taffeta pinafore just because I loved the look when I cleaned. Under it I wore a camisole and shorts so it looked like a dress. White flats finished my cleaning ensemble for my Saturday chores and all I had left was the vacuuming. I was doing the living room and heard the door bell and stepped on the button before opening the door.

I recognized Cindy immediately but not the twin girls who stood together smiling. I said hi happy that I was done and invited them in just as my mom came out of the kitchen. She too was done and it was a nice feeling to greet guest to a clean house. She asked if Cindy and her friends wanted something "refreshing"?

Mom got a "yes"

I met Ernie and Eloise walking into the kitchen which made me pause, look and at first wonder if Cindy had made a mistake with the name. Clearly they were twins and adorable and girls. Of that I was certain but she introduced one as Ernie and one as Eloise. I needed to test my hearing without risking an embarrassing moment.

"Which one is Eloise and which is Ernie," I asked.

"I'm Ernie," the girl on the right said and the one on the left said she was Eloise. They even sounded the same which was girls. I looked hard at the one on the right but not too hard fearing an international incident. I'd given up trying to use my deductive powers which were slight at best.

"So you have a boy's name because you are a girl that wants to be a boy," I asked.

"Susan's coming by to get them. I just wanted you to see them," Cindy said and then added, "they are interchangeable."

"What is an interchangeable," I asked.

"They've got to wear wrist bands at school because they do this all the time. Ernie and Eloise, obviously twins switch with each other or go out as twins. Drives their mother crazy. Ernie dresses identical to Eloise or Eloise dresses identical to Ernie. With the exception of their gender they are literally interchangeable. Ernie is a boy, Eloise a girl," Cindy said and then added, "isn't it the coolest thing you've ever heard of?"

"So how does that work at school," I asked.

"Their mother has to bring them to school and make them wear these bracelets that identify them by name at the start of the day. Otherwise they've been known to sneak off and switch clothes," Cindy said and added, "the bracelets are taken on and off with a key."

"That's hilarious," I said and added as a question to the kids, "so why don't you just pick a gender and go with it?"

"Because we can't decide which one we like best," Eric said to which Eloise added, "and we'd get stuck with just being one thing?"

"I get that," I said.

"Funny, no," Cindy asked.

"They get it," I said just as the door bell rang.

"That's Susan," Cindy said getting up with the kids as she added, "I just thought it was important you meet these two. They're coming to our school for the next year."

"Awesome," I said taking each hand and adding, "you can say you've met both us when you get there. I'm Lucy and Linus."

They laughed as they left. Cindy looked back and curiously mouthed the word "Lucy?"

"So what's with that name," Cindy asked.

"Thought I could use an alias," I said as I added, "you know, a AKA or As Known As."

"Sounds more like an alter ego," Cindy said.

"Does," I said and added, "started sounding funny introducing myself as Linus when I look more like a Lucy."

"I'm not complaining," Cindy said and then added, "it's just that it took you a long time."

"I know," I said and added, "I'm slower that most."

"I've noticed," Cindy said.

"So what are you going as on Halloween, baby or little girl," I asked.

"Neither," Cindy said.

"One or there other," I said with a touch of emphasis.

"I'm the dominate," Cindy noted and added, "you guys need a sitter. I'm the sitter."

"Really? Is that your thing," I asked suddenly seeing her in just that role.

"That is my thing," Cindy said.

"So I've got a question for you my dominate friend," I said.

"Ask little one," Cindy said.

"How is all of this possible? I mean why now and not when I was just an ordinary boy," I asked.

"You had your eyes closed," Cindy said. Now they are wide open. Not just open, but you shine and the others see it. Your friends see it, people see it. Those little kids see it. That boy Bruce and his mother, they both saw it. You watch, Bruce is going to be one of your new best friends and I'll bet his mother too comes to know you once she's past her son's sins."

"Think so," I asked.

"Absolutely," Cindy said and added, "it's a fact. You bring them out, you drag them out. You carry them out. What a Halloween this is going to be and I get to see it."

"Me too," I said and added, "all those babies and little girls."

"Not to mention your dress as well," Cindy said.

"Not to mention," I said grinning.

I had found the dress in a store specializing in girl's dresses made specifically for the Mexican Quinceanera. I nearly sprained my neck stopping to look in the window with Cindy. It was full of them, like a bridal shop for fifteen year old girls, and boys, that liked dressing like fifteen year old girls in flounced Quinceanera dresses."

I picked a lemon yellow and white faille of silk, over a very full skirt of bridal satin sitting on top of tiered skirts of taffeta petticoats. There were four layers over a silk like slip. When I took the dress from the hanger it sat on the skirts waiting for me to step inside but I was laying on the bed over my satin diaper.

For the first time Cindy was in the room and not mom helping me into my "play" panties after a dollop of baby lotion. I spread my legs after the panties, grunting singly at the electrifying sensation as my tip moved over the oily plastic. A whole night of this under a satin diaper. I'd be in a padded cell for the remainder of my days I mused as Cindy brought the diaper up between my legs. It didn't matter.

"Sorry about that," She said when I arched my back and curled my toes. It wasn't her fault and would be one of several I suspected. No doubt I'd at least be able to dress I whispered as the pleasure passed. I was almost right as the spongy soft satin diaper began playing over the plastic panties instantly as she pinned me into it.

Ruffled panties and a full slip finished the inside of the dress and Cindy, as if preparing a princess lifted the gown. I ducked under the skirts with my arms raised and together for the dress to slid down. I wiggled which turned out to be a bad idea sexually, although It would be a move I'd remember later for the nights activities. Cindy snickered.

"What," I asked bending slightly to take a little pressure off the diaper and plastic panties. I'd grown excited again and it was self perpetuating after that. Nothing I could do, or for that matter wanted to do would change the outcome till the inevitable and all I had to do was wiggle a little.

Cindy was watching me intently as I did a kind of hip rotation to a mental tune that went something like: "let's twist again, like we did last Summer." and all hell broke loose. There it was I mumbled like an addict. I suppose I was I thought standing still for the enjoyment to pass.

"Are you quite finished," Cindy asked and added, "you realize that if you don't change what you're wearing you'll never get out of this room."

She was right! I hated to but she was right... I went to my drawer....

HALLOWEEN

We waved at the others. I could hardly believe I was looking at Rick, now clearly a guy but clearly working hard at not wanting to be. He was standing next to his heart throb Sally in the same dress, shoes and wig but wearing powder blue instead of pink and in another pink dress his buddy Bruce. Even Bruce seemed in better sprits.

"So did your mom get over you dressing in her clothes," I asked coming up and patting Bruce on the shoulder.

"Did she tell you," Bruce turned and asked looking a little surprised.

"No, that was just a lucky guess," I said and then added, "so this is your punishment then?"

"More or less. I think she was going to do more, but then she sort of met you and the others and worried I'd like it like you guys so she kind of stopped with just this," Bruce said.

"And it turns out you like it," I said.

"How did you know," Bruce asked.

"Another lucky guess Bruce," I said.

"Can I ask you something," Bruce asked.

"Absolutely," I said.

"Is that little girl, the little one in that big girl's arms? Is she a real little girl," Bruce asked.

"Mark? Nope, that's a boy. Just like you and me! He's a year younger than me and about a foot shorter, but just another boy. That girl holding him is his pretend mommy. But like I said, he's like you and me because he too likes it," I said.

"So obviously you like it," Bruce asked.

"A lot," I said and added, "truth is we all like it a lot. Bruce, we are all a little like you. It's just that we've all taken different roads to get here. You took the... I'm going to try on my mother's dress.... road. Mark there took the.... I like diapers and baby bottle.... road. Rick took the.... I tried a breast and tried a diaper with it.... road. You seeing what I mean? All different roads."

"What was your road," Bruce asked.

"Mine? I took the.... I'm allergic to cotton... road," I said.

"So what are you guys? You like a club or what," Bruce said twisting slightly in his skirt as Rick and Sally began dancing. As soon as they did Mandy started dancing with Mark but his feet clad in his baby shoes dangled. It was adorable.

"So what's your mom think about us," I asked.

"She thinks you might be crazy, but you might be able to help me," Bruce said.

"Do you think you need help," I asked.

"I don't know much about dresses and stuff," Bruce said.

That's a good answer Bruce," I said. I thought about his answer, and that was the right answer. I know his mom meant the other kind of help but that wasn't going to happen, not from this group. Between all the girls and sissy boys we definitely could handle all the other stuff.

"Do you know what you are," I asked.

"Like if I'm gay or not because I like dresses? Not really," Bruce said but then added, "my mom says I'm going to be gay?"

"She might be right? Then again, she might be wrong. Best way to find out is to keep dancing till you can answer the question," I said laughing as I began to twist in my petticoats. Cindy ran up and started dancing as well. I saw mom talking with Bruce's mom Helen and both were laughing. That was good sign.

"Hey, we going Trick or Treating or what," Cindy yelled over the music.

"Let's do it," I yelled back as I grabbed the large cloth bag out of satin scraps and lace I'd made for candy.

Cindy's mom Alice was setting the table with Mark's mother Selma with chips and soda. As the darkness began to settle in the little kids started dancing down the street in both directions We joined all the other kids spilling into the streets.

Here's the really funny part... a lot of the little girls were boys but you couldn't always tell! Even when some of them were nearly six feet.

The end.