My first date.

It was to be my first date. It was a blind date, or so I was told. I know I know, sucker, big L... I've heard it before, even said it a few times to my friends.

Friends. I'm supposed to be a man, or so my dad used to tell me before all those drinks caught up with him. Don't get me wrong he was never drunk at home. But the old man was a professional bartender and always took a cab home. One he didn't have a drivers license anymore, two it was just easier and cheaper for him to pay ten or so for a ride home at three am. That and I think the owner paid for it.

Still he had a drink or sip or two while working an eight hour shift...or more. His liver just gave up the ghost and that was that. Really, it's still hard to believe but one week there is my dad all smiles for us kids and the next he is a wreck in a hospital bed then poof we are burying him.

It's been a few months and I think everyone is still shaken about it. Being a bartender he didn't really have much for life insurance, I mean who is gonna cover someone with a high risk of being stabbed? Still the house is apparently all paid for. The car was mostly paid off already, its a Honda. Sickic.. Yeah I'm not a fan. It's been in the shop a few times for the water pump.

It's moms and she swears that it's a good car. I don't believe that. It seems to eat more gas, oil, and water pumps than my other friends cars. And they have used hand me downs!

Back to my friends. Well there is Gale my supposed BFF. Still not sure what that means. Then there is Chris. He is ok if he is over the top gay. Then there is Chrissy... she ... well lets just say nobody is sure she even owns pants. Girly girl doesn't even come close. I mean pink shorts?...she is um..what is the current term? Black? African American? Which is funny since we are in Canada.

There is Deb and Dot the twins. Oh not identical twins, though that is hard to be sure since Deb wears glasses. Dot is a little slow on some things but very sharp in others. It's scary sometimes how she just quotes whatever person x said...verbatim.

So Chris has a mini van. Chrissy has a pink vw bug, are you shocked? Gale has access to her dad's truck but prefers not to drive it. Its a Toyota... Oh common almost every non new Toyota truck has rust. Some in places that it really shouldn't. Something about a deal with Russia for metal or something.

Chris's mini van, yep its a "grande caravan" wooo... he has the rear seat out and curtains on the windows.. I'm serious CURTAINS ffs! He is looking, I mean really LOOKING for SHAG carpet!...He has this whole plan for the van based off some movie van from the early 80's with cheeto and china or something.

So anyways my friend's said it was time for me to go on a date and that I would meet this person at the movie theater. It's six now and the movie starts at eightish. It plays in multiple theaters so we have some leeway.

I suppose I should introduce myself. Well I weight about 130 lbs, not sure since I usually get measured in kilos. Then it gets coverted to lbs by doctor. Oh yes I see one regularly. Ill get to that. I haven't needed to shave yet. Well I have hair on my legs, arms, which I hate and just shaved it all off in the bath. I took a nice long bath and used some of my sister's bodywash. It might be scented.

My parents were wondering why I was gaining weight on my hips and chest but not in the more normal boy places. At the moment the last test showed that yes I do produce testosterone, I am also just producing the same in estrogen. I have an MRI to get done but the funeral and everything kinda threw that out the window the next available spot is in a month or two. Canadian medicine at its best. Unless your dying there is a wait.

Before you think the worst. It's not a lot of weight. My chest is a little puffy as are my hips. I look ..soft but that's it. Until a few months ago I was never mistaken for a girl. Now it happens a lot. My sister, my older sister, is taking a course at the local cosmo college. She also works part time at Cut's and Such. No biggie she just started a few weeks ago. However with mom running around, and working, taking care of the details of dad's death and keeping food on the table, she just hasn't been around much to help Em.

Em's real first name is Tabitha, she prefers going by her middle name of Emileen, or EM for short.

So there is my her younger slightly feminine looking younger brother and she needs a test subject with pictures. Long story short she did my makeup and plucked out my eyebrows. It's the eyebrows that crossed the line I think. Before they were messy looking and now they are neat. Don't tell anyone but I happen to like them! I don't think of myself as a girl, or at least I don't think so.

Anyways Em had this thing before dad passed away of going shopping with friends....often. She would buy whatever current fashion was available even if she outgrew most of them in a month. Hence she has lots and lots of clothes. Some are stored in my room in boxes. Boxes which I have never looked at before. Honestly I hardly ever used my closet. Grab jeans and shirt go to school. Same on weekends but without the school part.

To be honest I did get more than a few looks at dad's funeral for wearing pants. It;s probably because they zipped in the rear, Ems cast offs in a rush. I wore a tie! Then again with a name of Arron I suppose some people think it's Erin. Go figure. Halfway threw the funeral one of my Aunts just told me to take the tie off as I looked silly. She also took my hair out of its place down my shirt.

My hair is not really that long dry, maybe just past my shoulders. It's just that it has a curl to it. Short it looks beyond stupid. Em loves to play with it. She has straight hair that is dark brown that is dyed different colors. Highlights I think she calls it. When Em was learning makeup for cosmo I was her doll so to speak so I also know quite a bit about makeup. And I think Em might be a bit color blind as the colors she wears clash badly. Maybe she does it on purpose? Dunno

So here I am, having to get ready for a date. I'm in a towel that mom insisted I wrap around my chest when the puffy thing started. I mean yeah the nipples are a little swollen and puff out a bit when cold but it's not that bad!

I went to my closet looking for something to wear as a guy is supposed to dress up for a date I think. Of course there is nothing except my ratty old jeans and the one suit that doesn't fit me at all anymore.

There is those boxes and I did wear her old pants to the funeral. This was a bad idea in hindsight but I was starting to panic!

I grabbed the boxes and put them on my bed to go through them. The first one held so delicate looking underwear, which I found interesting and it stirred something in me. I just had to try them on. Since I was alone in the house why not. There was this set of panties in black with lace on the sides that I don't think she ever wore. They felt great and fit way better than those boxers dad used to make me wear. I guess my heart started to pump at the feel of them. I just had to have more!

There was this bra without straps but seemed to have some sort of gel like padding too them. I tried to put it on back wards but I couldn't spin it around as it stuck to my skin like glue. With a bit of work I managed to get it fastened in the back. To my surprise the bra took my puffyness and gave me what looked like boobs. Boobs with a noticeable bounce! Freaky!

There was a satiny material that I now know is called a half slip. I put that on. It was like a little bit of heaven and made me feel sexy I guess. I had to see myself in a mirror. I didn't have one in my room so I went to Em's. In the mirror was a young not bad looking girl starting back at me with wet hair. I needed more! I can't describe it any better than that.

Of course seeing Em's pack, and I mean packed, vanity I knew what to do. A bit of work with eyeshadow, liner, powder, blush and lipstick I had my face done up not to bad...after four or five tries. Next I tackled my hair!

I decided to try what Em does and used the hair dryer on it while brushing. My hair seemed to gain a lot of volume and , I'm not certain how but I suspect that Em trimmed it in once and didn't tell me, bangs. Looking in the mirror I saw a fairly cute girl.

I stepped out of the room and went downstairs just to sort of cool off as I knew I should take a bath again as I didn't have a lot of time. I still had a bus to catch and all. I grabbed a drink of cola from the fridge and was sipping that when I looked at clock. Holy! it was almost seven!

I put down the cola and went back upstairs fairly quickly to my room to look for something to wear!. Now I should mention that I fully intended to find some pants. What I found was a red top that had really short sleeves, cap sleeves, and a deep v neck. I also found a black skirt, Not quite a skater skirt be pretty close! I sort of put them on because I really really wanted too. I figured it shouldn't be a problem while I looked for some pants. I searched all the boxes but didn't find any pants. I did find a pair of black sling back open toed shoes with a heel on them. Yes they fit. I have small feet, small hands too come to think of it.

I also found a black purse. Of course since I had all three I went to Em's room to look at myself and thought I looked really hot! Then I made the mistake of looking at the clock in her room seven fifteen I had like eight minutes to get to bus stop! I ran to my room and got my bus pass, house keys and some cash which I put into the purse since I didn't have pockets. I was almost ready to go out the door when I stopped myself.

No I couldn't got out like this! But at that moment I really really wanted too at the same time. I put down the purse and took off the shoes so I could run upstairs to Em's room. When I got to her door that feeling came back with a vengeance but I knew, just knew I needed a few more things. Some earings, that was not as painful as I thought it would be, I cleaned them of course.

A rather useless watch. A simple necklace, and I painted my nails. Both hands and toes before walking into a small mist of perfume. It was only then that I felt...ready.

It was wrong and back downstairs I paced back and forth in the heels a few times. Remembered to grab my phone and id. Drank the cola. Pace some more knowing that what I had done to myself was wrong but at the same time felt so good I wanted others to see me. Strange, well yes.

Was I insane? Probably.

"BUZZZZZZ" and I screamed as the doorbell rang!

"Arron open up!" it was Chris.

Not thinking I opened the door and only realized what I had just done when I was about to let go of door handle. It was far too late anyways as Chris looked me up and down.

"Mmm someone is getting lucky tonight. Pity I'm not straight!"

"Look I can explain.." I started..Explain what? I realized I couldn't explain anything as my mind went poof "im outta here"

"Yeah yeah you girls and always late getting ready! Gale sent me over to pick you up as she was sure you woundn't be. Lets go I got a date of my own, I hope, at the theater. Got your keys?"

"Well yeah I think" I searched the purse and pulled them out. He grabbed them and gently sort of pushed me out of house into front step before locking the door. He then handed them back.

"Didn't want you to mess your nails up. Lets go babe!"

It wasn't until he had helped me to sit in the van that I realized I was dressed as a girl and my brain said "ok im back it's time to freak out"

There I was sitting with my knees together and my delicate looking painted hands on them, seatbelt on and he was backing out.

"Wait Chris! I can't .. I can't...I ..I ..I" why is my chest hurting?

"Erin!....ERRRRIIINNN!"" he yelled at me. That got me to look at him.

"Breathe girl! In your nose hold, and out your mouth, hold, in your nose, hold, out your mouth." he actually had me do that a few times while he idled at the end of driveway.

Strangely it helped my chest felt better and I started to think a little better.

"You just keep doing that while I talk alright." this was totally unlike Chris. Usually he is all jovial, gayish and stuff. He was now scary serious.

"I know your brain is probably telling you all these things about wrong this or that." I just nodded.

"That is not you. That is the ingrained social norm. I am VERY familiar with that little voice." I nodded again.

"This is who you are. We all knew it. Heck I'm gay and I never had the least bit of interest in you. And yes I knew you were kinda cute."
I nodded again for no reason I could think of.

"Thing is I have never been attracted to girls. Heck I know most of the school believes your a girl, tomboy bigtime, but a girl all the same." Just call me a bobblehead as I nodded again.

"So when a girl goes on her first date she typically frants over what to wear and gets dressed up. And girl you did that in spades!" I think I blushed as my bobble head kept going.

"So calm down your doing fine. If, and I mean IF, there is any problems with your family, which I doubt you got a good one, I'll be there to face them with you. After all you helped me come out to mine." bobble...

He just put the van in gear and we drove to theater. Not that remembered much of that since I was breathing and probably doing the bobble thing the whole time.

When we got to theater he helped me out and hugged me as much as he dared! One thing about Chris , he is a hugger!

How embarrassing to get tips on walking from a boy! I mean, well Chris was coaching me on walking in heels, not that I needed much apparently. But still he is a boy! Then again so was I... wasn't I?

Chris floushished me into the theater flamboyantly like I was princess and I laughed!

So with a big smile on my face I was introduced to Dave who was to be my first date!

I'll say this much aside from looking me over as I walked up when he was told who I was he kept his eyes with mine.

They were very nice green eyes as I recall!

And that was my first date.



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