Alexa Chapter 36: London Calling, Part 2

My head was pounding for the second day in a row as I awoke from Jenny cuddling into me. I laid there and tried to force myself back to sleep, but it became a lost cause. No matter how much I wished I could drift back into the land of the Sandman, both my alcohol soaked brain and other more pressing matters urged me to get up. After stumbling into the bathroom to take care of the morning rituals and search for some aspirin, I made my way to the small kitchen and I was surprised to find Nikki there. ‘What are you doing up?” I asked.

“Couldn’t sleep. Dream woke me up and then I heard you. Figured I would get up.” Nikki told me as she produced a bottle of aspirin and handed them over with a forced smile. “I thought you might need these.” She said with a smile. “Especially with how much you drank last night.”

“Me? What about you?” I asked with a giggle. We both agree that we had a lot to drink the night before. It was a fun night; Jenny and I had finally made it to an Angel Party plus Katie was there to experience it with us. As Nikki put the kettle on, I realized this might be the chance I was looking for to get Nikki alone, so I could ask her about surgery. “Um, Nikki? Is there a place nearby where we could, um, go talk?” I felt so small as I asked this of my friend. Nikki must have noticed something was up. She smiled and said there was a coffee shop nearby where we could go. I said that sounded great and moved off to grab something to change into. I found a pair of leggings, my running shoes and my Man City hoodie. I grabbed my Viking hat and went back out into the living room to wait for Nikki. Jenny heard me as I came back out. She looked up at me.

“Everything alright babe?” She asked as well as her own hangover would allow her to. I bent over and gave her a kiss.

“Everything is fine. Nikki and I are going to get some coffee and talk.” I say trying to sound as convincing as possible, but I don’t think it worked very well. Jenny got a stricken look on her face.

“You OK?” she asked with all the love a hungover college girl could. I smiled down at her and nodded. It must have been enough to ease her mind because she smiled up at me before laying back down. We exited the flat and I felt like I was back home! There was snow and it was chilly. Nikki groaned about the weather as the two of us trudged the block to the small coffee shop. After getting our coffees, found a quiet corner with two comfortable chairs. As we tried to get situated, I noticed that Nikki wouldn’t stop looking at me. I tried to look away but was finally forced to look at Nikki when she asked me the same question that Jenny had. Was I that obvious?

“Something is clearly on your mind Alexa” Nikki said as she took a sip of her coffee. I attempted to avoid the gaze of my friend as we sat there. “Hey, come on, this is me. You can’t think there is anything that will shock me. Is it Jenny? Are you two having problems?“ That instantly broke me out of my nervousness.

“God, no!” I practically shouted, breaking the quiet of the Sunday morning setting. I leaned in and whispered, “It’s about surgery.” I said. The smile Nikki had was one of a sister.

“Oh, is that all.” Nikki said with a laugh, I think attempting to alleviate my stress. “If it was Jenny we might have had to have do some serious talking. What do you want to know?”

“Did you have any concerns over it? Like this was not the right thing or that you were going to lose something or how it would affect Sarah. Or...” The nervousness had broken and now I was blurting out questions faster than Nikki could address them.

“Slow down Alexa. I will tell you what ever you want to know, now let’s see, did I wonder if it was the right thing to do? A bit.” Nikki said. “I had been on hormones for four years when I went in, so I was well on my way to becoming a woman. The surgery just made my body match what my mind thought.”

“What about what people saw? Did you think you would be looked at as some boy who had butchered themselves?” I asked. Nikki paused.

“I don’t know if I had ever thought about what others might perceive. Those who knew ‘Nick’ might, but I think I know what you are getting at. But don’t worry what people see. This is for you. Not for Jenny, not for your family, not for Katie but for you. I was lucky that I got the support from Sarah and my parents and friends that made it much easier. And I know Jenny will be there for you. It’s you that is nervous about her, right?” Nikki asked.

I could only nod at first. “Yeah, that really is the biggest concern. I mean things are wonderful between us, but part of me still goes back to our arguments before I started on the hormones. She tells me she will support me what ever I do, but I still feel like I am cheating her.” I say.

Nikki laughed. “I think you told me about this song and dance before. Are we in a time machine? Is it 2017? Listen Lex, you have been through this discussion before and she still asked you to marry her. I am guessing that things have changed and that concerns you. It happens. You will find a way, don’t worry. Jenny loves you more than anything. Not only can you see that when you two around each other, but she told me as much,”

I think a 747 could have flown into my mouth at that moment. I sat there and stared at Nikki. ‘You two have talked?” I asked more shocked than anything. Nikki smiled and nodded.

“Do you think she would not call over here looking for advice? Of course, she did, and we were more than willing to help. We care about both of you and we will be there to help in any way that we can. Jenny was mostly concerned about what was going on with you and what you were thinking. She called one day when you were at Debbie’s and we had a long talk, the three of us. She loves you and will do anything for you Alexa. Speaking of people who will do anything for you, we should get back and see what is going on with the others.”

I felt better for just sitting down with Nikki and talking to her. I still hadn’t made up my mind, but it helped knowing that people who had gone through it before had the same concerns I was having now. As we were walking back, I asked Nikki one more question. “How much did it hurt?”

“Oh god! It was terrible! But it was a good pain. The worst part was not just the recovery from the surgery, but the dilating. The first few times I just about jumped through the roof, I don’t think I have ever cried that much. But slowly it became easier and after a time, it became more, Um, natural” Nikki said with a giggle. It took me a minute before I understood what she meant. I blushed a bit before she kidded me. “Since when did you become such a prude, Miss Quinn?” Nikki leaned in and whispered to me “Do you want to know a secret?” I nodded “Sarah got her own dilation kit. Made for some interesting mornings.” The two of us kept giggling over that all the way into the flat, where we found our other halves.

“What’s with you two?” Jenny asked as I sat down. I told her nothing as Nikki and I shared another quick giggle. Nikki than spoke up.

“We were just talking about surgery, that’s all. Alexa had some questions. And I hope I helped her“ Nikki said. She stressed the next part, though I think when she was finished she sort of regretted it. “And I told her how having the support of someone who cares about you helps. I told her that I couldn’t have done it with out Sarah and how much we shared as I recovered.” I giggled at the line, but Sarah didn’t. She shot Nikki a death stare and quickly moved out of the room. “Sarah, wait!” Nikki called out as she chased her wife into the bedroom. A very concerned Jenny looked at me and asked me what Nikki was talking about. I told her I would tell her later. Katie sat there sipping on her coffee the whole time taking in everything.

We had nothing really planned for today other than a dinner at Sarah’s mother’s this evening, which was good considering the conditions. Jenny announced she was going to take a shower and I decided to see if I could figure out a breakfast for everyone. Katie followed me into the kitchen. As I was digging around looking for some food, Katie spoke up. “Nikki was talking about Sarah helping with dilation, wasn’t she?” I turned and looked at Katie with what I could imagine was a horrified look and asked how she would know about that. “I have done some reading you dolt. I want to be able to help. And I will admit, I hope I am not living with you guys when you start that.” Katie said with a smile “I can only imagine what you two will be like as the dilation becomes more normal” she said with a wicked grin. I couldn’t help but be embarrassed about my sister’s comment. Mostly because after hearing about Snikki, I knew Katie was dead on in her thinking.

The smells of the food brought the Phillip-Thomas’ out of their room and soon all of us were enjoying a simple but filling breakfast. We sat around trying to figure out what to do with ourselves for the rest of the day. We threw out lots of ideas, but most of them were shot down due to the weather. No one really wanted to head out, and Sarah joked about how we should have gone somewhere warm. Jenny was fighting the cold a bit and pulled herself away to go grab a sweat shirt. She disappeared into the bedroom as we went through a few more options and talked about the previous night. It was then Jenny’s voice rang out “Hey Sarah? What’s all this? Lex get in here.” I saw Sarah and Nikki give each other a funny look as I moved quickly to the bedroom, Katie on my heels.

“Wow! What IS all this?” I asked as Sarah and Nikki came into the room and found us three roommates standing in front a wardrobe, stuffed full of dresses.

“Those are some of the dresses I have designed over the years. These are the ones that were especially for Nikki.” Sarah and Nikki both had a bit of a guilty look on their faces. Sarah continued. “When I first started designing, I had an On-Line store and Nikki was my model.” Jenny and I shared a giggle while a wide-eyed Katie began going through the designs. We looked back at the dresses. It only took a moment, and Jenny and I proved her father right because we looked at each other with huge grins on our faces. We both turned and looked at our hosts.

“Can we model some?” we both asked, causing those two to laugh and nod. We both let out a squeal. Katie began to laugh at my and Jenny’s excitement as we began to dig through the wardrobe a little more earnestly. Katie did join in and soon comments like ‘this is gorgeous” and “I am trying this one on first” were heard. It wasn’t long before Nikki and Sarah joined us in choosing some of these beautiful creations to try on. One of the dresses I wanted to try on was a multi-colored organza dress. I noticed a smile creep across Nikki’s face as she took in the dress I was holding up. She looked over at Sarah, who shared a similar smile with her wife. “Is there something funny?” I asked.

‘That is a, um, special dress. Sarah made it for me for my sixteenth birthday”. I watch Sarah and Nikki link hands in their special way. Jenny saw it too and rested her head on my shoulder as we watched two people who may have been more in love with each other than the two of us. At that moment I made a snap decision.

“I want to see it” I said. Nikki told me to go ahead. I stretched out my hand towards Nikki and shook my head. “Not on me, on you” I said with a smile. I saw Nikki reach up and wipe a tear before taking the dress from my outstretched hand.

The rest of the afternoon turned into s dress up time. Even the least girliest of us, Katie, was getting into it. At one point, Sarah thought we should do some proper modeling. She disappeared into another a closet near the door and came out with a camera and a tripod. Nikki directed Katie and I to move the sofa to the side and for Jenny to move the table. She returned from the bedroom with a large sheet that she tacked up to one of the walls. Sarah set up the camera and Nikki began giving orders. “OK Jenny, your first, get over here.” Nikki then began barking orders. “Toss that hair back blondie. Throw that chest out. Pretend that it is Alexa on the other side of the camera.” Katie and I began to giggle as Sarah shot away.

After Katie took her turn playing the model, it was my turn. I was nervous as I took my spot. Nikki told me to relax, but I couldn’t. Jenny saw I was having troubles and came over. She took me by the hands and stared me in the eyes. “Don’t be scared babe. You do this for me all the time. Relax. Don’t think about the camera.” I nodded but the fear was still there. Nikki stood there for a moment and then grabbed her phone. Soon, there was some music playing and Nikki told me to get into it, and I did. Nikki kept up her coaching and I began striking the poses I had only seen in magazines. Jenny stood behind Sarah and gave me some instructions too. As I was beginning to tire, Jenny spoke up again. “Now let’s get the pros out there. Sarah, you are first.” Sarah tried to beg off, but Jenny would have none of it. Katie took control of the camera and soon was giving instructions to Sarah on what to do,

I found myself standing next to Nikki, watching as Sarah was posing like a supermodel “You know this is what we used to do when the weather was bad when we were younger” she confided in me. I told her that this had been very special. I thanked her with a hug and Nikki told me anytime. That is when she decided to tease me. “Now I have pictures to show Joshua and you can start working for Heavenly Talent.” I warned her if she did I would get her. Just as I was getting ready to playfully get her, Jenny broke in and told Nikki it was her turn. Nikki smiled big and stuck her tongue out at me as the true pro took her place as Katie continued to snap away. Before we knew it all five of us were collapsed on the sofa and chairs around the room, exhausted but all commenting on what fun we had.

We spent the rest of the afternoon just laughing and talking. I had never felt so comfortable with a group of people that I did with these four people. Sarah looked at her phone and realized we needed to get moving. We reluctantly put Sarah’s wonderful creations away and got changed to head to Sarah’s mother’s for dinner. When Jenny and I were over here last fall, we never found the time to meet Beverly, something which I was still paying for with Debs. Debbie had met Beverly when she was an undergrad and had become a mentor to my counselor. We pulled up to what would be like any other house in the Minneapolis suburbs and piled out the car and made out way to the door. Sarah led us in and called out to her mother that we had arrived. A middle-aged woman with dark hair came from another room, wiping he hands with a towel. Two things hit me right away. One, there was no doubt that it was Sarah’s mother and two, something told me we were in a bit of trouble.

“You four are late.” Sarah’s mother said to us. I wasn’t real sure if she was joking or not. Katie worked hard at surpassing a giggle while the rest of us stared at each other. The ‘dry’ British sense of humor had me a bit of kilter. No one said anything as we stared at each other with nervous looks. I finally stepped up, mostly out of sheer Catholic guilt.

“We are sorry about that Dr. Phillips.” I said “We had a pretty busy schedule last time and it was our fault, mine and Jenny’s, we didn’t get a chance to meet. I am Alexa.” I said and turned towards my two roommates. “This is my fiancée Jenny and our roommate, Katie. It is a pleasure to finally meet you. Between Sarah, Nikki and Debs, I feel I know you already.” I stated as polite as possible. I looked over at Sarah and Nikki as I felt Jenny’s hand grip mine a little harder. I didn’t realize she was so nervous. Beverly eyed us up and then spoke.

“That was well stated Alexa, but I have been pre-warned that you may try kissing up a bit.” She said and slowly a grin broke through “I know what you four were doing last time. I remember being young once.” I felt the ice was broken as Beverly came and shook our hands and led us to the sofas in the living room and the five of us sat while Beverly took a chair. As we were getting situated I got the strange feeling that I was beginning a session. I tried to let it pass, but I must have given off some sort of vibe because I realized that my four comrades were all giving me an odd look. After some light conversation, Beverly excused herself, as she was going to check on dinner. “Nikki, can you give me a hand for a second?” Beverly called out on the way to the kitchen. As soon as Beverly was out of the room, Jenny began in on me.

“You OK, babe?” she asked as she rubbed my arm. I nodded, mostly because I didn’t know what else to do. I could see by the look that Jenny was concerned.

“I feel like I am almost in a session. I am nervous about what I am going to say and how I act.” I rested my head on Jenny’s shoulder. I felt Jenny move her arm around me and pull me in.

“I understand what you are saying Alexa. Mum has that effect on people.” Sarah said. ‘Even me.” That admission seemed to ease my nerves a bit. It must have been noticeable, because as Nikki reentered the living room, I could see the concern on her face lessen. “Dinner is ready girlies” Nikki announced, and we followed her to the dinning room. The meal was a classic English Sunday roast, complete with roast potatoes, carrots. Green beans and Yorkshire pudding. The meal was almost exactly what was standard fare at the Quinn household of my youth, except for the Yorkshire pudding. Sarah teased her mother a bit about going all out.

“Well I wanted to make sure you girls had at least one decent meal this week. Plus, your friends should experience some proper English food, not just takeaway Curry.” We confirmed Beverly’s fears of our recent diet as we giggled away. Nikki did inform her mother-in-law that we had had a decent breakfast this morning, which I think surprised Beverly, but she scrambled well. “Oh, that is right. Alexa is a cook and has been giving lessons to Debbie. What was it last time? Mexican? Maybe you can teach these two something.” Beverly said as she looked over at her daughter and daughter-in-law. I figured this was a chance for Beverly to see the true me.

“Well maybe Sarah can learn, but Nikki is a lost cause. I’ve seen pictures of her cooking.” Of course, everyone laughed, except for Nikki. Even Beverly smiled, and with that little comment everyone seemed to relax me a bit more. Jenny helped Sarah clear the table while Beverly began to grill Katie and I a bit about life in Minnesota. Now it was time for the true Katie to shine. Katie went on a bit about how interesting life had been since I had become Alexa and since Jenny and I had been together. “They are a handful, but I am sure you would understand that.” Katie said as she stared at Nikki. Nikki discreetly stuck her tongue out at Katie, which got her laughing. It brought a smile to my face to see how well these two were getting along. Jenny and Sarah returned, and the conversation became a bit more at ease. Beverly was still asking about me and Jenny but also was interested in our plans for the week. We did get a minor ‘motherly’ lecturing about behaving ourselves this week.

We didn’t stay very late as Beverly said she had some files she wanted to review before tomorrow. We said our good byes and began making our way to back to the flat. We decided we would take a one-night break and lay low. “Pretty exciting for a bunch of college girls on spring break.” Jenny laughed as she cuddled into me and I watched Nikki cuddle into Sarah. We watched a movie on Netflix before calling it a night. Jenny had already called it a night, falling asleep in my arms. As the rest of us sat and chatted and half watched the movie I realized how happy I was and what a great family I had. I carried Jenny to the air mattress and cuddled in with her.

I awoke Monday morning to my preferred alarm clock. The light kisses on my cheek and neck were the best possible way to wake up. I opened my eyes and drank in the beauty that was Jenny. The million-watt smile that may be the greatest thing in the world greeted me. “Good morning” she whispered, before returning to the kisses. And soon Jenny was pulling me closer and moving the kisses from my neck and planting them on my lips. After a few minutes those kisses, and caresses became more passionate. I tried to admonish my fiancée as my excitement level rose. “Jenny” I whispered. “We can’t do anything. Katie is right there.”

“But Lex, I want to make love with the most beautiful woman in the world.” she said. I was now official putty in Jennifer’s hands. I would do what ever she wanted. I tried to think of where we could go. It was then it hit me. Regretfully I tore myself away from Jenny and stood up. The disappointment in her eyes soon disappeared as I reached down. “Come on Jen. Let’s go work on our water conversation.” The excitement and lust instantly returned, and we quickly scampered off to the bathroom. Twenty minutes later the two of us returned to the living room holding hands, damp hair and love in our eyes. That joy was interrupted by a voice with a British accent.

“Did you save us any hot water?” Nikki asked with a knowing smile on her face. Rather than try and shoot back at her like I normally would, Jenny and I blushed and cuddled into each other as we plopped down on the sofa next to Katie. Katie looked over at Nikki and told our hostess she owed her two drinks tonight. “I knew they couldn’t control themselves.” Katie said with a grin that marked victory. But I didn’t care how much teasing we got, I was holding the most beautiful woman in the world and she loved me.

Sarah emerged from the kitchen with some coffee and we sat back while she began to inform us what the plan was for the day. Today was to be Jenny’s fitting, which meant that I had to leave. “Lauren and Ophelia will be over about 10:30 so that means you three have until then to get organized, but I will allow you some time to allow the water heater to refill.” Sarah said with a teasing smile. Jenny and I said nothing but giggled and held each other a little tighter. We enjoyed the coffee and allowed Sarah and Jenny to throw out ideas on what we should do with Katie today. Katie added a few things she wanted to see as well. Sarah thought the hot water had regenerated enough for Katie to take a shower while Jenny and I went to go get changed. Sarah told Jenny not to get to dressed up. “Don’t worry Sarah, I figured not. I am just going to help make Lex look frumpy.” She said with a giggle while I told her there was no way that was going to happen, and I began tickling her. We fell on Snikki’s bed laughing away. “I love you Jen” I told her as I looked up. For the first time that I can remember she gave me an answer that just about put me over the top.

“You don’t know how wonderful that is to hear.” I began to tear up at her response. “I wake up every day and I can’t believe I am with you and that won’t change. Ever.” She kissed me one more time. “Now you must get up, so I can make you look ugly. That will take A LOT of work!” She began digging through our clothes but stopping with a sigh. “I can’t do it. Nothing we have will make you look bad!’ I gigged at my fiancé and took over. I pulled on a pair of jeans and a pink and white striped sweater before slipping on a pair of knee high black boots and sliding into my black leather jacket. Jenny’s face lit up. “Perfect” she said before sharing one more kiss.

We returned to the living room, where I could see my two bridesmaids were getting anxious to get going. “Come on Alexa let’s go! Katie is anxious to get out of here.” Nikki said and stood up. She looked at me kind of funny and then over at Jenny. “Nice jacket Alexa, isn’t that yours Jen?” My reply was not very nice and got Sarah laughing. “That is so nice of you to lend Alexa your jacket Jenny” Sarah quipped. Before I could say something mean, there was a knock on the door. Nikki opened the door for Lauren and we were promptly told to leave. Nikki and I both exchanged kisses with our better halves and we went out the door. Katie, Nikki and I found ourselves standing on the street realizing we had not finalized any plans. Nikki stepped up at that point

“I figured we could go do some shopping or something, but you might get in trouble if you do that without Jenny, so do you want to go over to Heavenly Talent? Then maybe on to the coffee shop?” Nikki asked. Katie was game for anything, so we got into Nikki’s car and started to work our way to Nikki’s place of employment. I let Katie take the front seat, so she could see everything. And completely out of character she mouthed a thanks to me as she buckled in and we took off. Katie spent most of the drive asking Nikki about things we passed. I tried to throw myself into the conversation but was basically ignored. Now I knew how it felt to be the third wheel. I will admit I was curious as to how these two would get along during this trip, but I realized I had nothing to worry about. I also realized I had two wonderful sisters.

Nikki led us in to the offices of Heavenly Talent, and both Katie and I became a bit star struck, even though I had been there before. Here were two small town girls in the offices of one of the biggest modeling agencies in the world. And the next moment made it even more surreal. “Hey, Alexa, Katie what brings you two by?” Jamie asked. Katie looked over, mouth agape, at me before turning to look at the model who came up to us and talked to us like old friends. “Where is Jenny, Alexa?” Jamie teased me.

“It’s her fitting day” Nikki informed her mentor. “I had to grab my iPad, so I figured a quick tour would be fun.” Jamie nodded and told us to have fun and started to walk away. I looked at Nikki quick before turning and calling out to the supermodel who was walking away.

“Hey Jamie? Do you have a second?” The woman who had become something of an inspiration to me turned and smiled. “Sure, follow me.” Jamie said with a smile that rivaled Jenny’s. I could see her make eye contact with Nikki and nodded. Nikki led Katie off to the inner portions of the offices while I followed Jamie into a different part of the building. We entered a lounge area, probably the break room and led me over to a couch and comfy chair that sat next to the window. Jamie sat down and straightened the skirt on her simple but elegant business suit as I tried to control my nerves as I sat on the couch. Jamie was the first to speak.

“So, Alexa, what can I do for you?” she asked. The smile that had graced so many ads looked at me now, but this time it was the smile of a friend. It kind of threw me for a minute, but I gathered myself.

Looking around to make sure we were alone, I began. “I wanted to ask you about your surgery. You see my counselor brought it up and it has me doing a lot of thinking. Did, um did you think you needed to have the surgery?”

Jamie took a moment to answer. “For myself, yes. You must remember I was already out in the public eye. But I wanted it. How about you? Dou you want it?” I told her I did but I was worried about Jenny. Jamie laughed at that. “I don’t think you have to worry about Jenny. She will be there for you no matter what. I can tell by the way she looks at you. However, you must want to do it for yourself. Remember that. I didn’t have my surgery for anyone but me. The same as Nikki and the same is true for Paige and Jessica.”

“I do want it. And deep down I know Jenny will support me, like Stuart must have been a great support to you.” Jamie laughed at that.

“I wasn’t with Stuart at that point, but it did make me see something new in him. And I was there for him as he went through his. We actually were engaged two days before his first surgery. You will be lucky to have that support and love. I do need to get going, I have a meeting. But anytime I can help, just pop me a message” Jamie said as we stood up and exchanged hugs. I watched as the model left the lounge and I let her words sink in. I had now talked with two people who had undergone SRS, and both had same the same thing. I needed to do it for myself. I didn’t get a chance to ponder my own thoughts longer as my two ‘sisters’ came into the lounge.

“Did you and Jamie have a nice talk?” Katie asked. I nodded. “Good because I’m hungry, lets go get something to eat.” I rolled my eyes at Katie’s comment. “There is a shock” I said as Nikki said she knew the perfect spot. It wasn’t far away so we left the car and walked the couple of blocks to the coffee shop that Heavenly Talent had opened. Nikki had told me all about it and I was excited to go, not because Joshua had purchased it, but because of the manager who greeted us as we walked in.

“Sorry that we couldn’t head up yesterday.” Natalie said as we exchanged hugs. I told it sucked but that was what happens. Plus, it just gives us a reason to come over next season. We talked with Natalie a bit about married life and apologized that we couldn’t make it. “It looked like fun, and what Nikki could remember it sounded like fun.” I got a little kick in the shins from Nikki over that line. Lunch was great, and the time spent with Natalie was as fun as always. We did a little window shopping on our walk back and stop in a few shops to look some more. As we looked around, an inspiration hit me.

“Text Sarah, tell her to invite everyone she can think of over.” I said. “And I will teach you how to properly cook Mrs. Phillips-Thomas. I’ll teach you to make a nice romantic meal for Sarah.” I said. We became a trio on a mission as Nikki took us to a grocery store and I went into full Chef mode, which really got Nikki laughing. After getting everything, we needed and returning to the apartment, we found that all Snikki’s gang was there, even Ophelia who had ditched her husband. We let Sarah and Katie play hostess, as I told Jenny that we had work to do and pulled her and Nikki into the small kitchen and began the cooking lesson. It was cramped but the fact that Nikki was willing to learn made it seem larger. Nikki laughed as I ordered the two of them around, especially when I was ordering Jenny. “Is she always like this in the kitchen?” Nikki asked my fiancée. Jenny told her this was nothing, indicating that there were times I could be real demanding. I playfully told Jenny to quick talking and to get cutting. Following making up for my faux pas, we went back to the lesson.

The meal was enjoyed by all the girlies. We sat around after the champagne chicken, brown rice and steamed vegetable and enjoyed the wine. The three of us Americans felt more part of the group then we had even on Friday night when we felt we were completely accepted. It was like one big happy family. I couldn’t help but tear up a bit and Jenny noticed it and pulled me in. The smile she flashed was the one that always made me feel loved, but when Sarah leaned over and said welcome to the gang and announced our inclusion into the full group had I never felt more accepted in my life.

It was my turn on Tuesday to wake Jenny in the way she had awoken me. The warm feelings I had from the night before had me feeling that I wanted to share my love with my better half. Though we were stopped by forces outside of our control. “Knock it off you two, lets go and see more of London.” Katie admonished us. We giggled and started to get organized, including waking up our hosts who seemed to be moving a little slow this morning. The five of us gathered for morning coffee, ideas were tossed out. Sarah asked if we would mind if Jacinta came along with us, as she was feeling a bit lonely. Before either Jenny or I could say anything, Katie spoke up. “Of course she can! The more the merrier! Besides then I will have some one to hang with and not be the fifth wheel.” With that settled, we began getting ready.

Just as we were finishing getting dressed, Jacinta showed up and we made our way out the door. “This will be fun!” Jacinta said. “I don’t get to show many people London.” Katie said she could be the tour guide, since it would probably be the two of them. “The other four will be wandering off doing some couple things.” Katie stood their all proud while Jenny and I responded with a not so subtle finger. The three Brits thought it was hilarious the way the three of us communicated. “I am used to it girls. These two think they are so smart.” And while Katie was joking, I was looking forward to some time with just Jenny as we roamed the streets of London.

And that is just what we did. When we exited the Underground station, Jenny and I stood in awe at all the shops that surrounded us. We looked at each other and let out a little squeal. Katie shook her head and Snikki laughed. Jacinta seemed a bit confused, until Katie grabbed her phone and made a mock call to Jenny’s father. “Marty, I am sorry for the damage done to your credit card. It was my idea to go to Piccadilly Circus.” Jacinta understood at that point. And while Jenny and I should have been mad, we were more embarrassed. Mostly because we knew that Katie was right. We took off, hand in hand, and began one of our favourite activities. We were warned to be good by Snikki and Katie, but we found it hard. But we were successful for the most part. The most fun we had was when we went into a hat shop. We tried on several different hats. Some with wide brims, some with no brims. There were half veils, full veils and face coverings that would be appropriate if you were a beekeeper. We laughed and giggled. We talked in funny voices and were just simply girls. Not proper young women, but silly young girls having fun. I don’t know the last time I had such silly fun.

We went back out and continued our shopping trip and the common sound was laughter. We tried to talk Jacinta into buying some seven-inch heels with a two-inch platform. “You could hook up with some basketball player” Katie teased her. When Jacinta informed her not many around here. “We will have to find you one then when you come over”.

After 6 hours of shopping we decided to head back to the flat. Jacinta had decided to head back to her own flat and see what her BFF was doing. We exchanged hugs and departed the train for the walk to Snikki’s. Just as we were entering the flat, I received a text. “Come meet us at Rachel’s pub. Snikki knows where it is.” The text was from Jessica, a woman we had met the previous summer and who had defended Jenny and I to a couple of old bittys on a flight down to Florida. We met her and her partner after we got to Orlando and things began to fall in place. Jessica and Paige were both flight attendants, based here in London. They were engaged, both were transgender, and both were friends with the Angels and Out of Heaven! We spent one fun night at Margaritaville and a friendship grew. We considered them both to be very good friends and they had introduced us to a larger group of people, ones that made me feel as comfortable as Nikki and Sarah ever have.

I informed Sarah and Nikki about the invite and asked where Jessica was talking about. Both Sarah and Nikki knew exactly where it was, and they were all for it. “That place is fun and has some decent food. I will text the rest of girlies and see if they want to meet us” Sarah said as she reached for her phone and began typing. I watched as an evil smile came over her wife’s face as she also reached for her phone and began typing out a message. Jenny tried to ask what was up. “Nothing” Nikki said as the grin on her face grew and became a bit more devious. Jenny and I looked at each other and began to wonder what was going on while Katie began to giggle.

“Should we change?” Katie asked, and was told no. Sarah said it is just a pub not some trendy club. Nikki giggled and said she would remember to tell Rachel that. The rest of Snikki’s gang replied that would meet us there. We called a cab and decided that we would open a bottle of wine while we waited. As we settled in, I began to quiz Sarah and Nikki a bit about the pub. They said it was typical pub, a little larger than most. The occasionally had performers, but nothing crazy. We had finished the bottle of wine and started into the second one when the taxi finally arrived. We poured ourselves in and continued chatting. For the umpteenth time this week I felt as natural as possible. I leaned in and kissed Jenny. When asked why, I told her because I wanted to, and I snuggled in to my partner’s arms.

We were all glad that we finally arrived at the pub, as we were all getting a bit thirsty. The quiet bar was turned on its ear as we entered laughing and saw our friends at a group of tables. The squeals and shrieks were natural. Jenny and I rushed the table and were met by Jessica and Paige. I reached the Baltimore Blondeshell, as I jokingly called her, first. Just like with Nikki and Sarah it was amazing how close we had gotten to these two after only meeting a few times. “I see you have recovered” Jessica joked with me. I reminded her that at least the Vikings had made it, before I switched places with Jenny and hugged Paige. This was the one person I wanted to talk to the most. Paige was scheduled to have her surgery in a few weeks, and I wanted to get some of her thoughts, but now was not the time.

Katie appeared, and we began to introduce her to Jessica and Paige. Jessica then began going around and introducing the various women around the table “This is Sophie Connelly, Amy Harris and Hayley Fisher. They are three of the victims of Soixante-Trois. They call themselves Team Ash. They are the rookies with this group.” Jessica said with a giggle, which earned her a laugh from everyone at the table. She then moved on to the two women who sat close together holding hands. “This is Amelie Mason and the one sitting next to her is Natalie’s sister Ellen.” My smile faded a bit as I heard the name, but that was nothing next to the transformation that occurred next to me. I turned and watched as Jenny morphed into the person I met freshman year.

“Masson? Any relation Antoine?” Jenny asked as she began to eye up Amelie. Amelie returned the look and said yes. It was like the beginning of a heavyweight fight with the two fighters trying to stare each other down. Jenny though seemed to back down a bit and let a smile come through. “Can’t hold your parents against you. If we did, I would be in some serious trouble thanks to my mother.” Amelie smiled at that and the two shook hands. That seemed to break the bit of tension that had built up. Katie and I shook hands with the two before Jenny and I shared hugs with Zoe and Natalie, who we had seen yesterday. It was then our turn to introduce ourselves and Katie to everyone. And just like every time we have been around this larger group, we were accepted in with open arms. Jessica did cause some fun when she questioned Katie’s sanity, for living with us.

I slid in between Paige and Jenny and the general chatter began all around the table. Nikki and Sarah returned with some drinks and the laughing and gossiping soon dominated the sound of the bar. Lauren, Katie, Jacinta and much to our surprise Ophelia showed up shortly after that and the sound of the group took further control of the bar. Jacinta joked long time, no see. “Just as I walk in the door I get the text.” We apologized, and the new arrivals looked for seats Due to the number of people a couple of more tables were pulled up to form a larger massive table. We tried not to be loud, but it was inevitable. The manager of the bar came up and began joking with us to keep it down. Paige introduced the manager as a former co-worker, Rachel. Jessica joked that she and Katie could probably compare notes as they were both with overgrown kids named Danny. Rachel reminded her friend that she was engaged to her Danny. “Katie wishes she was engaged to hers” I commented which was quickly followed by an “Oww! No kicking!” The group began laughing at me, all except for Jenny who rolled her eyes and asked if Katie and I needed to be separated.

The drink flowed well and the noise level increased. And the group dynamic changed a bit. Team ASH decided to head out, as they all had flights tomorrow and didn’t want to get too crazy. I really enjoyed talking to them, but the one girl Sophie seemed to have something distracting her. They were replaced by two surprise guests. “Look at this group.” Jamie said as she and Charlotte stood there. Jenny was the one who became the most excited to see the two Angels and rushed over. She asked what they were doing here, and Charlotte informed them they had heard that there was a midweek girls’ gathering so they decided to come down. “Besides our PA took holiday so we aren’t able to work without her ordering us around” Jamie said teasingly. Nikki responded to her mentor with a stuck-out tongue and a giggle. The two models joined the group and the excitement seemed to grow. Paige excused herself and I saw this as my chance to talk with her. I excused myself as well. After we both completed our tasks and had left the restroom I asked her if she had a minute. She told me sure and she led me to a quiet booth.

“Something on your mind Alexa? Not having issues with all of this are you?” Paige asked. I told her no it wasn’t that. “Is it Jenny?” she asked. I laughed and told her no. “Good.” She said as she starred at me. I couldn’t find the right way to ease in to the questions I had about SRS. And me being, well me, I just blurted it out.

“Are you scared about surgery?” I asked with almost pleading in my voice. Paige started giggling at first before stopping. She was quiet for a moment and stared at something on the wall behind before turning to me.

“A little. I mean it is a lot to go through, a lot of pain and the recovery takes forever. But the fact that this what I have wanted my whole life makes it easier to prepare for.” She said with a smile. I asked her if she had thought of not doing it. She told me no. “I don’t know if I could live a life like Natalie, switching between the two sides. I want this. But do you know what the best part will be? I will have Jessica there with me to support me and care for me and love me, just like I will be there for her when she has hers. Just like Jenny will be there for you. I know I could go through it all on my own but to have Jess will make it so much easier. Are you thinking about surgery Alexa? I nodded.

“My counselor brought it up. To be honest, I hadn’t thought about it in a long time. I always thought it was the path I was going down but had never really contemplated everything I would have to go through. I admit I am a bit nervous about it, mostly for Jenny.” Paige cleared her throat and looked me straight in the eye. “You are crazy if you think you will scare her away. The looks she gives you today are the same she was giving you back in Florida. That girl loves you and will do anything for you. I wouldn’t worry about her. You have to want to do this for yourself.” And she reached over and hugged me. I thanked her for her advice and she told me it was no problem. “That’s what friends are for.” She said, and we exchanged another hug. Her words seemed to increase my resolve about my decision as did the smile I received from Jenny as we returned to the table. I realized that Paige was right, the smile has never changed. It was the same smile that Jenny had flashed me a thousand times a day. A smile of love. Paige noticed it too. She elbowed me in the ribs a bit and pointed out how right she had been.

Zoe and Natalie were the next to leave. Zoe said that even though the typical Wednesday class was canceled, she still had young ones to teach, besides Zoe and Natalie were honeymooners and as the alcohol began to flow a little more so did their affection. Jenny and I both gave them hugs goodbye. As is common with groups like this, the chat combinations tend to change and after the Renou-Briggs had departed, Jenny and I found us with our original hosts. I don’t know if it was just how much fun we were having or if it was the alcohol, but soon Nikki and I were singing along to the songs being played over the pub’s sound system. The girls at the table began cheering the two of us on, especially Jamie and Charlotte as we began to get into it a bit. Jenny and Sarah joined in a bit. The next song played put our talents on full displayed. ‘Oooh Baby do you know what that’s worth...’ came from the sound systems and squeals came up from the assembled group as did the chants for the four of us to sing along. We were all feeling no pain and gladly joined in with the Out of Heaven recording. When the song finished this incredible group of women cheered us on. We took our bows and curtseys and thanked them all. Jenny and Nikki blew kisses to the group. As everyone was settling down, we heard applause from behind us and then a comment.

“There they go again.” I heard from a familiar voice and turned to see Stephanie saying something to Kayla. The short blonde singer stepped up the teasing. “Do you think we can file suit against them for stealing our song?” she asked her band mate before more giggling began.

“What are you two doing here?” I asked. ‘I figured you were resting up?” The two singers shook their head.

“We are here as a favor to the management.” They said, and we looked around and noticed that the crowd in the pub had grown a bit. We wondered what was going on and before we could ask an announcement was made over the pub’s sound system. I looked down at Steph and she had a huge smile. We turned and noticed Rachel standing on a small stage in the corner of the bar. “Thank you all for coming to our special karaoke contest. This week we have two celebrity judges.” I shot a look at Steph and Kayla as soon as this was announced. Both had smiles on their faces as they slowly got up. Kayla’s was her typical sweet, slightly seductive smile, but Steph’s was different. It was a smile you would see on some bad guy in a James Bond movie and it was directed at the four of us. I turned and looked at Jenny and then over at Snikki as Rachel continued with her announcements. “From Out of Heaven, please welcome Kayla Ford and Stephanie Abbott!” The pair walked to the stage followed by cheers.

I awoke the next morning to Katie kicking my feet and rushing to the bathroom. The next sound I heard was a sound I did not want to hear, and one that started to make me feel queasy. I think I was still drunk as I laid on the air mattress. The only good thing was that I was cuddled up next to Jenny. Other than that, I could tell this was going to be a rough morning. My head was spinning, my tummy churning, and I had the worst taste in my mouth. If I had needed to get up to follow Katie’s lead, I doubt I would be able to. I tried to close my eyes, but the pounding of my head made that even hurt. I heard Katie come back and flop down on the couch and asking a higher power to kill her. I couldn’t help but giggle before stopping due to pain. Jenny stirred and admonished our roommate for being so loud. Then asking if she could have God take her out of her misery as well. I felt other needs begin to make their presence known, and I struggled to get off the air mattress, collapsing back a few times before the urgency of those matters took control.

I returned to the living room blurry eyed. That is when I noticed it. Sitting on the dining table was a trophy. I wondered where that had come from. I walked over and picked it up. The plate on it said, “First Place – Out of Heaven Karaoke Contest.” Panic began to take over as I tried to search my memory of last night. I remember watching several people get up and sing and the group at the table judging them. We thought some were good and some were very bad. For some reason the song ‘Venus’ started to play in my head and the nerves began. I raced for my phone and opened Facebook and noticed a posting from the official Out of Heaven page.

“Congratulations to the winners of the first ever Out of Heaven Karaoke Contest! The Fearsome Foursome-Alexa, Jenny, Nikki and Sarah for their version of ‘Venus”. Accompanying the post was a film of the four of us up on stage singing the old Sixties song that Bananarama had redone. Our movements looked as silly as the ones those three girls had done in their 80’s video, though they probably weren’t drunk. And if they were, there is no way they were as drunk as us. I let out a shriek as I watched the four of us dance and sing and laugh on stage. When were finished the crowd erupted and just like we had when we were playing around at the table we blew kisses to the crowd and curtseyed. “Oh god! Oh god!” was all I could say and kept repeating it as I sat there trying to recall the previous night.

“What are you yelling about Alexa?” Nikki asked from the bedroom. The tone of her voice proved that she was not happy with being awoken. I told her to check Facebook. Next thing I know I heard a similar scream come from the bedroom. “Nooo!” was the next sound as the realization of what happened the previous night sank in with Nikki. Then a groan came out. “Oh god, it’s worse Alexa. Go to Steph’s Twitter.” I followed Nikki’s advice and started to open Twitter on my phone. Jenny must have gotten there before me. “She has over a thousand likes on it!” My shoulders sank as the video played out. Sarah and Nikki came stumbling out of the room and sat cuddled in the chair while I sulked over to my fiancée. As I buried my head into Jenny, a clear voice came from the video as the song ended.

“Thank you, girlies! We will be signing autographs in the back!” Nikki, Jenny and I began giggling at the announcement Sarah had made on the recording. I looked over at our host and could see her face was extremely red as she tried to hide it in Nikki’s chest. “We will not live this one down“ Sarah’s muffled voice proclaimed as us other three bandmates began giggling. Sarah pulled her head out and starred at me and Jenny. “No more drinking with you two” she stated before she broke out into her own giggle. Just about then her phone started going off. She got up to retrieve it. We heard her say hello and then “No! You and Katie will not be allowed on the tour bus.” followed by some more giggling. While Sarah was talking to her former business partner, we began trying to figure out what had happened.

“I remember saying that we were not going up on stage” was what I added. Nikki rang in that then she remembered SOMEONE disappearing and returning with shots of tequila!” Katie groaned on the sofa at the mention of the Mexican liquor. Jenny tried to deny it, but I knew how she was when she was on a roll. And so did she. Katie decided it was her turn to enter the conversation. “I think it was after the second shot was when you four decided it was time to sing, but there was a line, so you, I mean Jenny, decided a third shot would be good.” As Sarah emerged from the bedroom, she confirmed everything that had been said, including that Jenny was the instigator in all of this. Jenny tried to pout, but for once there was no sympathy from me as my head hurt too much.

I don’t know if it was the fact she was being picked on or that she remembered an earlier conversation. “Is it really 9:15? We have to get going! We have to go see Little Jenny at dance class.” The collective response from the room was one gigantic groan. Jenny slowly stood, trying to combat the effects of the previous evening and began urging me to get up. She then told the other three that we had promised, though none of us could remember. I obliged and following a quick shared shower, we turned it over to our hosts and finally to Katie. Within the hour we were out the door and our way to Krystie Fullerton’s School of Dance. Where we were met almost instantly met by the namesake of the studio.

“Come to work on your choreography, Venus Girls?” Krystie teased us. I am sure that behind the oversized sunglasses, Nikki was giving her the death stare. Sarah asked how she knew already. “I knew last night. Jamie and Charlotte sent me the video. Don’t worry, only all the Angels and Out of Heaven have seen the video. And Stuart and Mikey and some of the other boys.” Nikki groaned as we made our way towards the dance studio, followed by Krystie tossing out more names at us. “I think Laura saw it, so all of her gang. And I am sure Stuart sent it to Ian, so it is probably a hit in Cardiff.” And as annoying as the taunting was, it was kind of nice as it made us feel like we were part of the larger family.

And the teasing from an Angel did not stop there, as the joshing continued from the one Angel we had not yet met, Mary Carter. She like the others teased us but in the same good-natured fun. She was just as wonderful as the rest of the Angels and her daughter Natasha was a little cutie. We stood to the back and watched the toddlers as the went through Zoe’s instructions. As we watched them some more, Sandra came in. She took one look at us and shook her head. Thankfully she said nothing but did give the stern motherly look at her oldest daughter and her wife.

As the lesson ended, all the little girls of the dance class ran to their mother’s, except Jenny Thomas who made a beeline for my Jenny. “You came” she squealed as ‘Big’ Jenny bent down to hug her. “You are very good” my Jenny said, “Even better than Alexa.” Sandra came over and we had a little discussion with Sandra before she had to head out.

“So, did you girls have fun last night?” Sandra asked as Katie, Jenny and I stood there feeling as guilty as ever. Nikki tried to stumble through an explanation a bit. “Don’t worry girls. I understand. You need to blow off some steam occasionally, just be careful OK?” Nikki nodded at her mother while Jenny and I tried to get over our embarrassment. Katie let out a short sigh of relief and leaned back against the wall. Sandra then turned her attention to my Jenny. “So, tomorrow is the day of the fitting and the big play date, correct?” We nodded. “I was thinking we could meet you at Nikki and Sarah’s and go for a little outing from there. Would that work?” Sandra asked ‘Big’ Jenny, who smiled as wide as she ever does with me and readily agreed to the plan. The times were set, and Sandra hugged her two older daughters before collecting her youngest and heading out.

We said good-bye to Mary, Natasha and Kristina-Leigh as well. We mentioned how nice it was to finally meet her and how we wished could have spent so more time with her. “I have the feeling this won’t be your last trip over” Mary said before heading out the door with her daughters. Zoe came up as her students left and began to tease us a bit as well, saying how sad she was she had missed our performance and hoped we would repeat it sometime soon. Sarah had the line of the day. “I think this band is going to break up. Mostly because I can’t handle the day after.” We said goodbye to our friend and returned to the apartment, where the rest of the day was spent trying to recover. Curling up with Jenny and just hanging with these three wonderful friends was the best way to get back to normal. We did not have the motivation to do anything else, not even cook, so we searched for a pizza place to deliver. It was interesting to see the different tastes we had in pizza, but it was fun. We readily tried the other’s choices and spent the evening talking and giggling away. You would think after six days of being together, we would be sick of each other but that was not the case. What was even better was how close it seemed that Katie had become with our London friends.

I awoke the next day to my London alarm clock shaking my feet. “Time to get up you two.” Nikki said before moving past. Jenny snuggled into me a bit as I tried to get my brain working. As the brain began to warm up, I realized this was the day of the fitting! The fitting of MY wedding dress! I was still having a hard time believing that this was going to happen. Before I could even begin to really think about it, Jenny kissed me and asked me if I was ready. Her smile was as loving as ever. I nodded as it truly began to sink in. I nodded but my comprehension of what was about to happen must have shown on my face. Jenny kissed me on the cheek, “You have nothing to worry about, babe. Sarah will be nothing but kind.” We rose and went through our morning routines. As we waited for Sandra and little Jenny, my nerves increased and no matter how much Jenny, Katie and Nikki tried to calm me down I was becoming more of a wreck. Just as Jenny was leaving she gave me a long hug and a tender kiss. “Just relax. Enjoy it.” The hug helped, but the nerves were still there as the trio left. As the door closed, Sarah took control.

“Let’s get started.” She announced. “Lauren and Ophelia will be here soon. Nikki get the bride-to-be ready.” An evil grin came across Nikki’s face and a giggle came from Katie as I was led back to the bedroom while Sarah began to get things organized. I saw laying on the bed a white corset, and as much as the thought of Nikki tightening me up again made me, I had a sense of relief that it wouldn’t be Ophelia at the laces. I was trussed up, with some unfortunate help from my big sister and was handed a robe. I was led back into the living room where the small platform that I had stood on back in October was placed. Lauren and Ophelia, had arrived while I was being tortured by my two sisters and waited anxiously. A big smile came to Sarah’s face as she asked if I was ready. I nodded, and she produced the garment that I had only ever dreamed of wearing. I gasped as the wonderful creation came into view. My heart raced as the eagerness to put the dress on took control. Sarah noticed it but held me off. I was so excited I thought I was going to hyperventilate. Ophelia and Lauren stood onto two chairs and held the dress for me to step into. I allowed the le incredible silk take over my senses. Ophelia zipped up the back and Lauren helped me on to the stand. As I stood there shaking, the expressions on the three fashion students was like that of craftsmen observing what needed to be accomplished. Sarah, Lauren and Ophelia began to circle me, grabbing bits of the dress. Lauren playfully admonished me to relax and quit shaking, that it was making their job harder. Sarah grabbed a chair from the table and stood on it and began working on the front of it. I would have felt a bit more self-conscious if it had been either of the other two ‘feeling me up’ but Sarah knew my concerns. I had joked in the past that Jenny used me as her over-sized Barbie when we went shopping, but today I really felt like one.

As my three designers orbited me making their notes, Nikki caught my eye. She had a huge smile on her face, and not surprisingly tears in her eyes. But that was expected. Nikki was like me, a bit emotional. It was Katie, who was standing next her that got me going. Katie was crying! It took a lot to get Katie in a weepy mood, but there she was. And like Nikki, she had a huge smile on her face. “You are gorgeous Alexa” Katie said in a voice just above a whisper. That got me going, the tear ducts started to fill But I had still not seen the dress one me, other than trying to look down at it. I looked at the three women circling me and asked If I could see the dress yet. Lauren and Sarah blushed a bit as I brought them out of their technical discussion.

“Pardon us Alexa” Ophelia said as kind as could be. “We do tend to become a bit insular in our thoughts when looking at our designs. Would you like to see the dress?” I nodded more than enthusiastically. Sarah waved at her wife and Katie to bring over the three-sided mirror that sat in the corner. “Now close your eyes until we get it set” Nikki told me. I did and could feel my nervousness as I closed my eyes. I could hear ‘my sisters’ struggling a bit with the mirror and thought I might have an opportunity to sneak a peek at myself. As I tried to open one eye, Katie’s voice of authority came through and admonished me. I slammed my eyes shut again. A slight tremor took over as the anticipation to look took over. I whined for the two to hurry up and was once again admonished by Katie. Finally, Sarah told me to open my eyes.

What stood before was something like a dream. There was a woman standing in an incredible white silk creation. Two straps hung off the shoulders and the front dove to almost perilous depths between the woman’s breasts. The dress clung tightly to the shapely curves of the dress model and then sprung to a full skirt that barely brushed the floor. I could see my five friends standing beside the mirror. They all had smiles on their faces, and three of them were tearing up. That was when I looked at the face in the mirror and realized the beautiful woman in the mirror was ME! That was when my own waterworks began. “Oh my god! The dress is beautiful!”

“The model isn’t too bad herself” Nikki said. Katie chimed in “I only hope I look as good as my little sister when I get married.” After all five women continued to compliment me, and I shared hugs with them, the session became serious. The questions started flying on my thoughts of the dress. What I thought of the fit of the bodice, was it too tight across the hips. I made a joke that I guess I wasn’t eating until after the wedding., which was a mistake. “Don’t worry, we can always tighten the corset a bit.” Katie said with a devious grin that was matched by Nikki.

As the three designers talked some more, a moment of panic came over me, “What am I going to do the day of the wedding? I can’t have these two trying to adjust it.” Sarah told me that it would be fine, but I didn’t believe her. I turned to Lauren and Ophelia. “You two are officially invited to the wedding, and your husband Ophelia and your boyfriend Lauren and Katie and Jacinta. All of you. I won’t be able to make this look right!” Katie laughed at my insecurity. Lauren and Ophelia thanked me but said that wasn’t necessary. “No, it is! We will cover your room. We will get you a deal on a flight, but please come.” They both nodded at my invitation. That’s when Sarah told me the truth.

“They have already been invited. Jenny had the exact same melt down as you. We agreed that they would beg off coming just to tease you a bit.” The grin on the young British woman’s face was huge. I think I may have growled at Sarah a bit as the whole room, besides me, burst into laughter. They three designers went back to circling me and showing spots where adjustments could be made to the dress. After what seemed like mere minutes of standing there as pins and markings were made, I was told it was time to slip off this marvelous creation. I took on more look at myself before Katie and Nikki helped me down from the stand and helped me out of the dress. And as she was helping me down, Katie whispered in my ear that I really did look beautiful. “You are going to knock ‘em dead at the wedding. Though I might need a new boyfriend because you may give him a heart attack!”

Katie and Nikki led me back to the bedroom to help me get out of the corset that I had worn. It was only as I was standing there did I realize that 2 hours had passed! I guess time flies while you are having fun. And as I looked back out into the living room, I could see Sarah and Lauren slipping the dress back into its protective cover an odd feeling hit me. I felt sad until Nikki reminded I would be wearing it again soon, but that didn’t help. The one thing that could take me to a better mood came crashing through the door of the flat just as Sarah was storing the dress. I could hear the giggling of two people with the same name and I was momentarily brought out of my malaise. I quickly finished dressing and found the two Jenny’s telling my five friends the tales of their adventures. Jenny looked at me with the same smile as always, which I attempted to return. She looked at me funny for a moment before turning her attention back to her new BFF. The odd feeling though wouldn’t leave me.

No one had eaten lunch, so we decided to head out a grab a quick bite. Lauren and Ophelia said they would take a rain check, and we shared hugs with our two designers and newest friends before they took off. We thank them for everything and told them we would see them this summer. The rest of us went down to the small coffee shop nearby and enjoyed a light lunch. After we ate, it was time to say our goodbyes to Sandra and little Jenny. It was very cute watching the two Jenny’s share a big hug. As I watched the pair, I couldn’t help but think about when the two of us had our little one. Would I be a good mom? Where did that come from? The zone I had been in grew and then I started running through all different kinds of things in my head. When we are married, and we have kids, how would we explain me? Would I still be living in this limbo that I seem to be trying to figure out during this trip? As I went to give the youngest Thomas girl a hug good bye, I caught Jenny’s eye again. She was giving me the same look as she had when we were back at the flat. A look of questioning and concern. As we began walking back she asked if I was OK. I told her I was, but I don’t think she bought it.

We decided to head to the center part of London and doing a bit more sightseeing on our last day in London. Katie wanted to see Westminster Abbey, where she used a ‘Friends’ line “Hands down best Abbey I have ever seen.” I rolled my eyes and she came back with the remainder of the line “You are Westminster Crabby”. I made some comment about her being a complete tourist and continued the eye roll. We did have fun at the Abbey church and I did not bug Jenny about ‘The Da Vinci Code’, like Marty and I had back in October. We toured some more of the area around the Abbey and Palace of Westminster and took pictures of everything to show when we got home. We stopped for dinner at the one last place Katie had said she wanted to go, Hard Rock Café. I think she just wanted to get a T-shirt, which not only did she pick up, but Jenny and I grabbed a couple as well. The whole afternoon and evening had not given me and Jenny a chance to talk and I could tell it was eating at her. We didn’t get a chance to talk when we got back to the flat either, as we realized we had to get organized for our flight home the next day. Jenny and I cuddled in together that night without ever getting chance to talk.

The next morning, I woke up to the sound of rain hitting the window. It was the perfect ending for our latest London excursion. I rolled over into Jenny and tried to cuddle up to her in a chance to steel a few more minutes of sleep. I felt her arms wrap around me and hold me, and once again I became more convinced that I was the luckiest person in the world to be with this incredible woman. She whispered good morning and I could sense she was going to say more when Katie shook the air mattress. “Hey, you two get up. We need to leave in a about an hour and a half.” It was enough to interrupt our apparent opportunity to talk. We got up and took a shower and finished our packing. Sarah and Nikki took our place in the shower and it seemed like we were in the back of Nikki’s car on our way to the airport before we could even catch our breath.

The scene at the airport was harder than I could have imagined. Katie was even in tears as we said good-bye to Sarah and Nikki. And as was predictable as the sun rising in the east, Nikki and I were blubbering messes as we said good-bye. “No freaking out the next few weeks, OK?” Nikki directed me, and I told her I would try, “And remember if you do, I am here. It will all be fine.” I thank Nikki and Sarah both once again for everything, as did my weeping fiancée. Thank god Katie was there to reel us in and drag us into the terminal. We cleared security and made our way to the Delta Club for a little refreshment before they called out flight. Jenny and I said good bye to London one more time and followed our roommate on to the plane and settled in for the long flight back to Minneapolis.

Not long after we had taken off, Katie had nodded off and I had cuddled into Jenny. She finally had the chance to see what had been on my mind. I sat up for a moment and took her hands in mine. I took a breath and told her. “I’m going to do it. I’m going to have surgery.” I had said it. The question I had been wrestling with had finally been answered. “Are you ready?” I asked, nervously. Jenny just smiled.

“Of course, I’m ready. I love you Alexa and as I have said a million times, I will always be there for you. Not just then but for the rest of time.”