Andi and Allie - 24

Andi and Allie Chapter 24

“…are you illusions, or are you really what you seem to be?”

Peter came into the office precisely at nine. I had already had my coffee with Rhona and, although we had a great gossip session regarding one of the artist’s new boyfriends, I told her nothing of my weekend discussions or decisions. I was still very frightened by the entire thing and I didn’t think she could provide any help in alleviating my fears.

I had chosen to wear a relatively new dress with a blazer on top. The dress was a lovely silk and linen blend print with a cream colored field with the print being thin lined swirls of bright primary and secondary colors. A row of bone buttons ran down the front and ended at the hem just below my knees. The collar was simple and repeated the print of the dress. The sleeves were short.

24-1 IMG_2021.jpgIt was a perfect spring dress.

The blazer was navy blue with brass buttons. It was fairly standard with the exception of a bit more room in the breast and a slightly more tapered waist. I wore my pair of cordovan pumps with a two inch heel. Allie loaned me one of her Coach bags for the final ‘preppy’ touch.

Peter looked absolutely delicious in an Italian tailored dark blue pin striped suit. His hand painted red power tie stood out wonderfully against his blinding white silk shirt. That man knew how to dress to impress. And he looked so natural in that kind of attire that one might think he was born in it. He wore sheer Italian hose and Italian black loafers. He was completely manicured with not a single hair out of place.

I don’t know what it is about that man but, in spite of my intimate relationship with Allie, Peter never fails to arouse something deep within me that wants me to dick dive him. And the thing of it is that it’s more than simply a sexual thing. We really seemed to relate on more than one or two levels.

Anyway, we made quite the couple as we headed for the street to hail a cab. Peter had sent the samples up to corporate on Friday so that the account executives could have a look prior to the meeting which was scheduled at ten. The drawings of Mister Scoville were in my portfolio. Peter suggested that I take them with me rather than let the account executive show them. I had to rework them anyway.

We got off on the corner of Fifty-Seventh Street and Fifth Avenue. Peter liked to walk the short distance to corporate because the street was always such a show. It’s probably one of the most fashion conscious areas in the city because so many ‘glamour’ companies had their offices in the area. Everything was kind of top shelf; especially the art galleries. So, people tended to dress to impress. I took Peter’s arm…he always offered…and we strolled.

We arrived in good time and proceeded to the elevators that took us to the thirty-third floor. He knew his way around and smiled at the receptionist as he led me through this new world of chrome, glass, postcard art and more chrome. We finally arrived at the client conference room. It was the only one that had solid non-see-through walls.

Peter opened one of the double wooden doors and allowed me to enter first. Like… I knew this was something he simply did; open doors for women. But it always made me feel special and somehow appreciated. His actions always made me feel protected and safe and I liked that. I liked that a lot; especially in this alien world I was entering.

24-2 IMG_2013.jpgThe meeting room was ornate and solemn.
The walls appeared to be of rosewood, or some other expensive exotic. Brass fixtures of all types accented the darkness of the wood. The long table looked like koa…maybe…very light and highly marbled in multi brown shades. The chairs were high backed with leather padded arms. There were coffee cups and water glasses for six people at one end and two white uniformed catering people were finishing setting up what appeared to be breakfast on a side board.

On the other end of the table were the packaging samples for Susan. Several easels displayed the cardboard sheets used to make the boxing. Several prominent posters displaying the new logo for the household division were displayed opposite. All in all everything looked to be in order. The only thing missing was the new proposed logo for the small tool division; my surprise.

Peter was instantly on the house phone letting the appropriate people know that we had arrived. I removed my blazer and hung in over the back of one of the heavily padded leather conference chairs. I then asked Peter if he’d like coffee. Upon his smiling nod I went and got us both a cup. Just as I was coming back to hand Peter his cup, the door opened and three men walked in. Peter stood up and greeted each one by name.

“So where’s our genius Andrew?” Mr. Helms, the senior vice president of the company, asked whilst looking about for another man.

“Uhhh…” I put my hand to my mouth and cleared my throat. “I’m Andi?”

“Oh… Fine… Good work...”

I could see that he was instantly shocked but he recovered quickly. He peered at me over his glasses with a smile that I think was genuine and he shook my hand delicately; as one would shake a woman’s hand. I smiled warmly back at him.

“So you’re the one who’s responsible for our two new major accounts this year.” He chuckled. “Perhaps we need more…people like you.”

“Well…?” I smiled coyly and rolled my eyes upward. “Peter was very instrumental with our getting the work from both companies.”

The account executive still seemed to be a bit in shock but said nothing as he also shook my hand. His boss, however, was a different story. He kind of looked at me with distain and I swear I thought he was going to wash his hand after shaking mine.

“Andi…” I think his name was Johnson. “Would you please excuse us? We need to speak with Peter for a moment or two.”

He didn’t ask, he virtually ordered me out of the room. I knew exactly what was on his mind; the kissing of my butt goodbye with his rather large winged tipped shoe. It’s so strange that I hadn’t felt any prejudice or plain out hatred about my eccentricity before today; except for that incident with Simms. I suppose that rule of out of sight is out of mind applied. This was the first time any of these people had ever seen me. What could I do?

“I’ll wait by the receptionist.” I spoke calmly and politely and, of course, smiled pleasantly.

I sat in a large black leather armchair that nearly devoured me in its plushness. Scattered about the wood and glass coffee table were a number of trade and business publications. I picked one up and nervously leafed through the pages; aware of the visuals but not bothering with the print.

I don’t know how long I sat waiting but for sure I had gone through a few of the magazines. Every once in a while I would look up at the receptionist and smile. She would, in turn, politely smile back at me. Suddenly the polished stainless steel elevator door opened and out walked Susan and her father. I quickly got up and rushed over to greet them. Susan actually met me half way.

“Andi darling… How are you?” Susan gushed as our lips met in a very brief kiss. She backed a step away whilst still holding my hands. “You look absolutely lovely today.”

Then she turned to the very tall gentleman in a finely tailored English tailored grey glen plaid suit.

“Daddy… This is Andi the creator of our new look.”

“It’s a real pleasure to meet you Mr. Scoville.” I smiled and offered my hand.


Mr. Scoville stared me firmly with his deep blue eyes and I trembled slightly. I thought he was looking right through me. Although he took my hand and shook it firmly, yet gently, he said nothing and did not smile.

“I don’t have a lot of time so let’s get to it.” His voice was quite deep and gruff.

“You have to excuse daddy…” Susan chuckled. “He hates anything that requires him, or anyone else, spending his money…except for me.”

“Well then…” I smiled and giggled. “This way please.”

I waved my arm in a sweeping motion toward the conference room.

Susan linked arms with me as we walked. I stopped and knocked softly on the wood double door. After hearing a ‘yes’, I opened it widely, Mr. Scoville had a good pair of shoulders and I wanted him to have his grand entrance. He waited for me, and then Susan to enter before coming through the doorway. I turned quickly to introduce Peter, who Susan also greeted warmly, Misters Helms and Johnson, and then the account executive whose name I still failed to remember.

I took Peter by the hand and we walked to the far end of the table where the food and the displays were. Knowing that Mister Scoville had little time, or patience, I began with my explanation of what we had done. He pick up every constructed box and thoroughly inspected each. Then he moved on to the new logos displayed on the easel. He turned to no one in particular and spoke.


I quickly turned and got a cup off the table. I poured the coffee and looked at Susan. She smiled and mouthed ‘black…no sugar’. I turned and handed it to him. He took a sip, nodded and turned to me. I thought he was going to thank me.

24- 3 IMG_2014.jpg“These are no good.”

Oh…my…God…!!! My heart stopped.

“Sir…?” I looked at him questioningly; glad I had done my bathroom duty sufficiently.

“I like that general idea. But the children are no good.”

‘Okay…why’ I thought to myself but I waited for him.

“It gives the wrong impression. You’re showing a fatherless family. While in some quarters that flies high…in others it does not.” He did have a point. I had to think quickly.

“Well…how about Mother Earth?”

He looked at me for a moment with skepticism. So I explained.

“Suppose the woman is holding a pie form with the world in it?”

I could see him thinking about that. As he was thinking I removed a drawing from my portfolio with his daughter’s image, one with an African American woman, and then a Hispanic woman followed by an Asian woman. He grasped the concept immediately; even more so than what I had envisioned.

“We could run all four logos as a sort of mix and match. That way they will all be on display in all of our outlets.” Mister Scoville smiled and looked at me. “How long for the corrections to the logo to be made…?”

“I can have them for you…” I paused and rolled my eyes upward in thought. “…maybe by Wednesday? I simply have to pulled the figure and add the pie. I show Peter everything I do and it doesn’t leave our hands without his say so.”

Mister Scoville looked at me, back to the drawings, to Peter, and then to his daughter. He just smiled, I think for the first time, and nodded to Susan. Susan, of course was elated. She had just received daddy’s okay on a big project.

“Uhhh… Mister Scoville…? I have one more thing to show you…if you have time?”

He frowned at me, looked at his wrist watch, and looked back at me.

“Make it quick.” He snapped.

I led him down to the other end of the table and, unzipping my portfolio again, brought out the design of the hand tools division.

“I thought you might find this interesting. Peter and I worked on this…gratis.”

I thought I should add that. This man wasn’t going to pay for anything he didn’t order…or totally like. He looked at the drawing for only a moment and a stunned look appeared on his face. Mister Scoville placed his coffee down and pulled out a chair. He sat down and stared at the drawing. I sat next to him on one side and Susan on the other.

“You know…” He said wistfully to nobody in particular. “I thought of doing just this very same sort of thing maybe…” He pursed his lips and gazed upward. “…maybe forty or more years ago.” He turned to look at Susan. “But I got into such a…such an animated discussion with your mother over the color of the shirt that I shelved the entire thing. She thought the shirt should be red.”

“I originally had a red shirt.” I had to giggle. “Peter said that the blue would be much better.”

“Yes… Well… The red must be a woman thing.” He laughed. “Also, the tin hat hasn’t been worn in years. We make a high impact yellow helmet that we…” Oh my God…he said we! “…might want to consider.” He stared at the drawing for a few more minutes. “And you did this on your own initiative?”

“Well…? Yes… Peter and I...” I smiled as graciously as I could.

“Well… I need to think about this. May I hang on to these?” Mister Scoville was suddenly rather…paternal in tone?

“Oh yes…they’re yours. And, just for the heck of it, I’ll do one with the yellow helmet.”

“Thanks.” He put his hand atop mine and patted it lightly. “If you get any more genius ideas, you be sure to let Susan know.” He gazed seriously into my eyes.

“Yes sir…I will.”

“And call me Bill. My father’s name was Mister.” He laughed as he stood up. “And, if you ever find yourself in need of a job…” He turned to look at Peter. “…or you… I assume you come as a set.” He laughed. “I’ll pay you twice what you get here and work you three times as hard.” Mister Scoville shook my hand with both of his. He didn’t have to say anything because it was all in his eyes. “By the way Andi, do you take on commissions? I’ve heard that you are quite an artist.”

“Yes sir…”

“Ah…?” Mister Scoville held up his index finger.

“Yes Bill…” I giggled as I corrected myself. “My orchestra does play requests.”

He laughed as he shook Peter’s hand in a similar fashion. He then turned to Susan and, taking hold of her by her arms, kissed her forehead.

“Good choices baby. It’s all yours now.”

He then quickly shook the other three men’s hands and hurried out the door, my portfolio in hand with the drawings inside. Bill Scoville suddenly became all business again and his business didn’t include spending any more time with us. Now it was Susan’s show.

Mister Helms turned to his vice president of accounts and the account executive. He looked at them with a hard expression on his face.

“Well gentlemen, I think it’s time to let our creative people do your jobs.”

I shuddered at his indictment. He turned to Peter and me.

“Well done…” I think he started to say gentlemen. What a giggle. “…people. I think we need to meet one of these days soon. Perhaps we can find something a bit more…involving for you two. I certainly wouldn’t want to…” He turned to his neon red blushing executives. “…break up a winning team.”

He couldn’t contain his wide grin as he turned to Susan. “Ms. Scoville, if there’s anything at all you need, I guess you know who to contact.”

He shook her hand and chuckled as he turned and left; his two executives following behind rather timidly.

“Well… I see no reason to let all that food go to waste. I’m starving.” Susan laughed as she took our hands and led us back to the food table.

I didn’t get to speak to Susan seriously about my proposed ‘change’, or transition? But I did mention that I needed to speak to her about something personally important. I think she might have known what was on my mind. She told me to call her that evening and we could discuss anything I wished.

On our ride downtown…

24- 4 IMG_2015.png...Peter told the gist of the secret conversation.
Evidentially the sales guys wanted me out of the picture. Mister Helms, however, wanted to hear none of that. He figured that if I was making them money, why mess around; especially if the clients didn’t object.

Peter also told me that Mister Helms pulled him aside and asked if he was screwing me. Can you imagine? Peter told him that he wasn’t although the thought had crossed his mind. It seems that Mister Helms knew about Peter’s particular leaning and he simply wanted to make sure that Peter wasn’t covering anything up for me. What that might be is a mystery, but so be it. I asked Peter for the afternoon off so that I could go home and work on the changes requested.

Upon getting home, I immediately changed into my ‘working clothes’. I stopped first in the kitchen to fetch a glass of white wine and then went downstairs to the studio. I was walking on air; three feet off the ground. The morning couldn’t have gone any better and, I must say, I was a little bit full of myself.

Here I was not even one year out of school. I was becoming a parent with the most wonderful woman I’d ever met. I was going to have my very first exclusive showing at a top gallery. I helped land two major accounts at my first job. I was finally going to commit to living my life with an ‘outer’ image consistent with my inner one. And, if all that wasn’t enough, I actually had friends; a total rarity for me.

I was sitting in front of an easel looking at Susan’s image and trying to envision the ‘pie’ she would be holding when my cell phone rang. It was Allie. She no doubt was wondering how the meeting had gone.

“Hi baby.” I was so full of joy over the day thus far. “Everything went better than perfectly.”

“I told my parents…about us.”

Her very subdued attitude suddenly turned into a deluge of tears. She could barely speak. I didn’t expect her to. I was in shock. I’d completely forgotten about them, as I did with my own mother.

“Do you want to come home? Would you like me to come and get you?” I couldn’t envision Allie having it together enough to come home herself.

“Okay…” Allie whined amidst her sniffling.

“Andi dear… Rather than you coming for her, why don’t I simply bring her home?” Jill was now speaking.

“Okay…what happened?” I was hoping for some sort of cogent reply from Jill.

“Oh my God…!” Jill huffed. “They are such…such pigs. They didn’t have a single good word to say…except maybe for ‘goodbye’. There were threats and warnings and such. They are just absolutely horrid people.”

I couldn’t even begin to imagine how harsh and wickedly evil their tongues must have been. They really didn’t deserve to have Allie for a daughter. In fact they didn’t deserve to a child. I don’t remember hearing a single nurturing word out of either of them when Allie brought me to visit.

I was so grateful that Allie had Jill. At least Jill could hold her hand and hug her and tell her that this too shall pass…even if it doesn’t. I mean…some things can be fixed and some can’t. But whatever the case nothing was getting fixed today. Today was for the tending to wounds of the spirit. Today was for the soothing of those terrible bruises of the psyche.

I went upstairs to change yet again. I didn’t want to greet them wearing my stained and spirits smelling work clothes. I wanted to look at least…comfortable? I want to be that fluffy teddy bear or something that Allie could draw into her breasts for security as a small child would. I then went down to meet her at the curb.

When the cab pulled up to the curb, Allie shot out the door before the vehicle even fully stopped. She ran right into my arms and began to cry. Jill followed her out carrying Allie’s two bags. I held my arm out so that Jill could thread the loops with my arm. Jill embraced me briefly and kissed my cheek and, without a word, got back into the cab to return to work.

I ushered Allie into the building and up to our apartment. The entire time her face was buried in my neck and shoulder. I dropped her bags at the door and escorted Allie to our bedroom. She sat on the bed as I helped her undress and slip into something a bit more comfortable. The entire time she sat looking stunned and shocked as tears silently fell from her eyes.

I didn’t want her to go to sleep though she had to be completely emotionally and physically drained. I wanted Allie to talk to me so I took her hands and led her to the cave. I made her comfortable and got her a glass of wine. She sat straight up and I sat cattycorner to her with one arm around her shoulder and my legs beneath me. I waited.

“I had to tell them.” Allie said with a look of desperation. “They had to know sooner or later.” She sniffled.

24-5 IMG_2025.png“They called me a whore.”
She burst into tears again. “They said that it was impossible and that I was lying. They called you a lesbian. They said we both were and that…that…we were going to hell.”

I felt like saying that hell was having those two for parents. But I held my tongue. This was the time for listening.

“When I convinced them that you were really a guy…they said you were a freak, a fag, a homo, and anything else they could think of. They said that I was no longer their daughter as long as I pursued this course of action. They said I should abort our child; that it was an abomination.” I handed Allie the entire box of tissues. At this point she was completely broken up.

Allie telling her parents never occurred to me. Telling my mother never occurred to me. I should have been more aware of this inevitability or at least the possible outcomes. Knowing her parents as little as I did I still should have anticipated this reaction from them? No matter what she did, no matter how hard she tried, she could never seem to please them.

And yet I saw a completely different person. I saw a woman who was already more than quite accomplished both at her job and at her art. She was kind, charitable, humane and, well, sexy as hell. In spite of her inherited money, Allie was determined to make it on her own. I mean… Seriously…? What else could they want?

“They threatened to have me declared incompetent and have my money taken from me. They also threatened to have you on every tabloid in the world. They threatened to do everything they could to break us up.”

Allie took a huge sip of her wine and placed the glass upon her end table. She turned her body and put both her arms around me, burying her face into my…boobettes. I simply held her and tried to calm her by rubbing her back. To this point I had said nothing. I could only listen.

I couldn’t believe the cruelty of these people. At least my mother had some sort of an excuse. Substance abuse, and the need to fund it, was definitely overwhelming for her. She had no clue of what she was saying or doing most of the time. But even during her worse drug and alcohol fuel rage, she never directed her venom toward me personally. It was usually toward the ‘men’ in her life.

24- 6 IMG_2027.jpg“I don’t know what I’m going to do. I feel so…so angry.”

‘Good!’ I thought. Anger can be worked with. Anger is something I know a little bit about. I waited until I thought Allie got all of it…or at least most of it out. This was something I felt we could deal with if we kept faith with each other. And I really thought that would be no problem.

“What would you like to do honey.” I asked in my softest voice.

“I don’t know. Maybe kill them?”

Allie threw her hands up in exasperation. I could see the anger and frustration on her face. I could relate but just as I could I knew she really didn’t mean it.

“Well…you could do the next best thing.”

“What…? Have somebody else do it?”

“No silly…” I giggled. At least that brought a smile to her lovely face. “You could kill them in your mind though. Pretend they are dead. Don’t call them and don’t accept any calls from them. Rather than let them take control, as I guess they usually do…” I looked at her and she nodded. “You take control by deciding when, and where, you choose to deal with them. Okay?”

Allie nodded as a small trickle of tears began again. I really hated her parents for doing this to her.

“They called me a fat cow who can’t attract anyone other than freaks and losers.”

Now I was really pissed. Okay… So I may be a little bit different. I admit that. But a loser…? Never…! I felt like going up there and punching what’s his name in the nose…only the last time I tried that I wound up in the hospital.

“Allie… Look at me.” I tried to put as much seriousness into my voice as I could. Allie slowly looked up at me through her reddened eyes. “Every time I do a portrait or some painting, a study even, of you, it sells; usually first. People are not buying them because you’re some ugly pudgy freak. They’re buying them because they see the same thing that I do; the image of a gorgeous and amazing woman.”

Allie gazed at me intently. She wasn’t really listening to my words as much as the passion, real passion, she heard in my voice. Of course my arm waving and expressiveness went a long way as well.

“And you’re going to become even more gorgeous as our baby grows in you. You are the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever known and I am so lucky to be living with you…and I’m so in love with you.” It suddenly occurred to me as an afterthought. “And that’s probably the last glass of wine for a while so enjoy it.”

“Oh…” Allie looked at the pale golden liquid, smiled and giggled. “Yeah… I forgot.”

Allie stared at the liquid for a moment and nestled in my arms. Then she gazed at me.

“I don’t understand why they’re so…so…bitter? Why are they so hateful?” Poor Allie was on the verge of tears again. And who wouldn’t be?

“They can’t control you…as if you needed controlling…so they have to tear you down. You’re a threat to everything they stand for.” My voice was becoming louder and I got to my feet. “They…” I pointed up with my index finger. “…are the enema of the people! And you…” I pointed my finger at Allie. “…are the hero. My hero…!”

Allie laughed at my dramatics. I could see, and feel, the stress and the trauma ease from her face and her entire body. I bent and kissed her on the lips with a smile hoping it would transfer onto her face. It did. I took her hand and led her into our bedroom. It was a good time for her to nap and recharge her energy. We started off with her in my arms and she finally spooned up behind me.

I awoke before Allie and managed to disentangle myself from her arms without waking her. I hadn’t told her about my impending call to Susan, which would now also cover Allie’s potential problems with her parents. I went into the kitchen to prepare a snack for Allie upon awakening and, after leaving a note on the counter for her, descended into the studio to try and get some work done.

I stared at the drawings and thought about the changes I needed to make. But, oddly enough, the one image that kept repeating in my mind was that of Bill Scoville as he recounted his past and his wife. I saw a lot of humanity in him at that moment and I suddenly found myself in front of my easel sketching out his image; trying to capture that look he had.

I heard footsteps behind me. Allie came up to me and put her arms around my shoulders and kissed the side of my face.

“Thanks for the snack. I was hungry.”

“I thought you might be. Fell a little better?”

“Yeah… Now I only want to torture them…slowly and painfully.” Allie giggled. “Who are you drawing?”

She rested her chin on my shoulder and we touched cheeks.

“This is Susan’s father, Bill.” I said with my eyes never leaving the image.

“So Bill is it?” Allie seemed surprised. “I guess you made a good impression.”

“Yeah…” I giggled. “You might say that. I need to call Susan later.”


“I got my lawyer’s name from Peter and the doctor’s from Susan. If we do this, we might as well get it right. Maybe she can help us pull this all together. You know…?”

“Yeah…” Allie sighed. “We should probably find out how I can protect myself if my shitty parents decide to do what they said they would.” I nodded.

“If there’s one thing I learned after four years of intensive therapy...” I smiled at Allie as I was about to unleash the one great truth I’d learned. “You can’t help but love them, but that doesn’t mean you have to like them.”

“Yeah…” Allie nodded her head and smiled. “I really don’t like them very much when I think about it. And honestly…? There really never was anything likable about them.”

That I understood fully. I always found that I could put whatever was happening in the day, good or bad, into my work. I sort of knew that Allie could do the same. She went into her studio and began to ‘throw mud’. I continued on what would become a portrait of Bill Scoville.

The time flew by and soon enough the light of the day was gone; at least for what I was doing. I had the reasonable likeness I wanted and it seemed to project a facet of Bill Scoville that was not often portrayed; if at all. It was a softened look; a very human look of a thoughtful man.

Allie and I washed up and then headed for the kitchen. We decided to do a fridge ‘harvest’. Our left overs never went to waste and we always had more than enough when we cooked or went out for dinner. This made for a wonderful potpourri of culinary delights without any rhyme or reason…or hard work.

The plates often held fish, meats, pastas of varying shapes topped with different sauces, and a salad of sorts. The only thing missing was the wine. We opted for flavored carbonated spring waters instead.

I made the call to Susan whilst we enjoyed fresh cut fruit for dessert. She was happy to hear from us and overjoyed that I had decided to do as she suggested. I also told her that Allie had made the same suggestion a while back which seemed to thrill her even more.

24-7 IMG_2029.png“Smart woman…”
Susan commented. “I think she and I will become good friends. We seem to think alike…at least as far as you’re concerned.” She laughed.

I had her on speaker phone so that Allie might hear, and comment, on what we were saying.

“I think I need the lawyer to kind of rush things along and make sure everything I need is in order.”

“Smart decision… You’ll also need to stay with Edith to make sure things are done right.” Susan seemed to be more up to speed than even we were. “Who’s your lawyer?”

“She’s a nice woman named Joan Watson? She’s doing this for free.”

“Joan…?” Susan laughed. “Does she know you and I are friends?”

“No… Does that matter? Do you know her?” I was surprised…and puzzled.

“She’s a member of our little club. I’ll give her a call and let her know. That should speed things up a bit.”

“It would be nice if we could find someone down at N.Y.U. medical center. That’s where I’d like to have our baby.”

“Well…” Susan chuckled. “I make no promises but perhaps we can get you both in the same room.”

“What…?” What…?! Surgery…?!

“Oh Andi honey…” Susan was now laughing. “You take everything so seriously. By the way, you do know my father was rather impressed by you.”

“He was?”

“Oh yes… Absolutely... The manner in which you took over the meeting by showing him exactly what was done and so on...that impressed him. That should have been the account executive’s job. But you were faster on the draw.” Susan laughed.

“It really wasn’t my intention. He seemed to be in a hurry so…” I paused for a moment. “I guess I pissed them off?” I giggled.

“You think…?” Susan couldn’t stop laughing. “I love you Andi. You’re so very honest and innocent. You are very lucky you have Allie to guide you through this terribly dangerous forest called life.”

“Which brings up something else that maybe you can help us with?”

Allie spoke for the first time. Her voice quavered indicating her nervousness as she looked to me for assurance. I took her hand and smiled confidently.

“Absolutely sweet heart… What is the problem?”

“I’m pregnant…”

“Oh congratulations honey... I am so happy for you…for both of you. I assume Andi had something to do with this?”

Thankfully Susan covered my indiscretion about Allie's...procedure?.

“Maybe a little something…?” Allie giggled. “Anyway, I told my parents about it, and about Andi, and they had a major hissy fit! They cursed us both. They called Andi all shades of horrid names and threatened to have themselves declared trustees of my inheritance. And they want me to have an abortion.” Allie was becoming upset again.

Just the thought, the imaged sound, of their voices was enough to bring tears to her eyes. I couldn’t imagine how traumatic that must have been for her. I handed her a napkin and came around the counter to hug her. Susan was silent for a few moments. She must have guessed what was occurring.

“Listen sweet heart... Nothing is going to happen. You already have the right attorney. Joan is the youngest full partner ever at Forester, Waters and Hopkins. She’s very aggressive and very smart. She’s expensive but she gets things done properly the first time and I’m sure she’ll be a big help to you Allie; especially when there’s a fee involved.” Susan chuckled. “I’ll inform her about this issue as well.”

I could see Allie breathe a little easier. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose.

“Thanks Susan. I’ve heard of that law firm. They’re huge. She must be very good.” Allie was smiling again.

“She handles any issues that come up with our club members. She’s done several things for me personally; especially getting rid of ‘what’s his name’.” Susan laughed. “By the way… Since we’re on the topic… I would really like to take you to lunch at our club. Perhaps this Saturday if you’re free…?”

“Well…?” Allie rolled her eyes in thought. “Normally we have Lilly, that’s Peter’s daughter, and a few of her friends from her art school over.”

“I can handle that easily sweet heart. You go out to lunch and enjoy.”

Lilly had been our guest for more than a few weeks now. On Saturdays she usually brought a couple of friends. Allie and I would help them with their art assignments. Sometimes Lilly came over during the week simply to work on her own pet projects. We’ve even had her sleep over on occasion.

“Good… Then it’s a date.” Susan actually sounded quite excited. “Perhaps Joan will be able to join us. I know you’d love to meet her.”

Susan was being an absolute doll. I am so glad we just happen to get along so well. And now that Allie seems to have warmed to her, so much the more. It’s not as though either of us have had a deep pool of friends as a support group although with the few we had, we were lucky that they gladly shared their resources freely.

We spent quite a bit of time on the phone simply talking about…stuff. I found it very easy to talk with Susan and she was certainly full of advice and suggestions for Allie as a future working mom; letting her know what to expect and how to deal with insurance and all that kind of thing.

By the time we got off the phone, Allie and I were both physically and emotionally drained. We decided to make it an early evening and, after a quick clean up, headed for the bedroom. Allie decided to run a bath for the two of us. She hadn’t really used the tub often but, now that she had a ‘bath buddy’ in me, she was determined to make it more of an event.

I must admit there was something very soothing about getting into a tub full of warm, scented and oiled water. Regardless of the type of day one might have had the ills and ails of plain old big city living simply melted away. We sat in the tub facing one another with our heads back against the porcelain. I watched the flickering candles’ light dance against the ceiling. The effect was mesmerizing.

“So…” Allie spoke in her soft and soothing alto voce. “You had a good day?”

“Smashing… Superb… Unbelievable… It was the ‘Pandi’ show at its best.”

I’d taken to calling anything Peter and I did jointly as the ‘Pandi’, Peter…Andi, show.

“Evidently the account exec and his manager wanted me taken off the job; or at the very least hidden away. That was before the Scoville’s showed up. They felt that someone named Andrew should show up looking like an Andrew.” I giggled.

“Oh my God… They were going to fire you?”

“No… They just wanted me out of sight. I’m sure they gave Peter an earful. But the executive vice president of the company was there and he just listened and by the end of the meeting he was laughing at them. I think he wanted Peter and me to take over their jobs!” I laughed as I remembered the look on their faces.

“And Susan’s father…?” Allie asked as she slid her foot along the inside of my thigh with a sheepish grin on her face.

“Uhhh… What…?” Allie could be so very distracting…at almost any time.

“Her father…?” She shrugged and gave me that ‘duh’ look as she gently rubbed her toes against my other thigh.

“Ohhh… He was pretty amazing. It’s easy to see where Susan comes from.” I giggled as I thought of his mannerisms at that meeting. “He liked what he saw though I do need to make a few minor changes. Then he turned the entire show over to Susan. I think we’re going to get the entire account.” I closed my eyes and simply enjoyed the stroking of Allie’s foot.

“You know…” Allie leaned forward and grabbed my nipples between her index and middle fingers. She pulled.


She yanked again in spite of my halfhearted protest until I finally sat up.

“You know…” She spoke again as she gently massaged away the pain and grasped my face in her hands. “I think I could learn to love you?”

She giggled and kissed me fully on my lips. Allie’s tongue then licked along the line of my lip. I couldn’t decide whether it tickled or ignited as shock wave after wave shot rushing through my body; or both. I then felt her hand grasp my engorging dick and squeeze it gently but firmly.

“I so want to fuck your brains out.” Allie whispered as her gaze held mine. I reached for the back of her neck and met her lips with mine. We kissed for what seemed like the longest moment ever.

“I so want to see you try it.” I challenged with a snicker.

We exited the tub and couldn’t towel ourselves off quickly enough. Allie and I had this ritual. If time permitted, after bathing in the evening, we would rub one another with a body lotion or light massage oil. Tonight was no exception. Whilst I spread an extra-large bath towel on our bed, Allie made the preparations of warming the oil. I had several rolled up extra-large towels for placement under the hips to ease any back strain and for behind the neck and knees whilst on one’s back.

Allie entered the bedroom carrying a tray with a carafe of heated water with the bottle of oil within. She also had an extra-large towel with her. After placing these things down on our foot table, she went about the room lighting candles to add to the atmosphere. I shut off the lights and put some Rachmaninov on our stereo. We were into a ritual of sorts and the performance of every little detail only added to our excitement.

“Okay…” Allie said with a huge grin as she removed her terry cloth robe. “…I’m first.” And she practically dove onto the bed.

‘Well…’ I thought. ‘…so much for the democratic process.’ I laughed as I watched her wiggle onto the towel with her eyes closed and her smile simply filled with anticipation. I got on the bed and took the bottle of oil in hand as I straddled her waist. I patted her side, which she lifted, and I put two rolled up towels beneath her hips. I then uncapped the oil and let it flow, drop by drop, across her shoulders and down her spine.

24-8 IMG_2019.jpgAs I began to rub the oil into Allie’s back and shoulders…
…she began a chorus of sounds indicating her pleasure with my activities. I closed my eyes and let my hands glide across her body following the ingrained picture of her inside my head. The wonderful floral scent of the oil only added to my pleasure of touching her luscious body.

I worked my way slowly down to the small of her back. More oil was needed so, without removing my hand from her lower back, I retrieve the oil, popped open the cap, and again poured the slightly viscous oil drop by drop as I moved further down toward Allies feet. I recapped the oil and covered her upper body with the sides of the towel.

Allie was silent as I worked my hands over the small of her back and downward over her butt cheeks. I used just a bit more force to penetrate a little deeper into her cheek muscles. The feeling of her flash sliding between my fingers was divine. I lingered, but not too long, and then moved to her upper thighs. I worked my fingers, and hands, to the rhythm of the music which proved to be rather hypnotic. A piano concerto was playing as I moved down to Allie’s calves. I loved working those muscles. They seemed to have been made specifically for my hand size.

But the best part, the most fun part, the most sensual part was about to happen; Allie’s delightful feet. My lady took pride in taking care of her body. She was determined to have, if nothing else, the softest, smoothest, and most pampered of physiques. God knows she’d never be the skinny model type. But then again, who cared? I certainly didn’t. I loved the fact that she was so very womanly in all ways.

Her feet were amazing. The skin was so soft and smooth. Even the edges of her heels were delightfully pliable. And her toes, my God her toes… They were just so perfectly dimensioned to the rest of her foot. I loved playing with her slightly plump little digits with my lips and tongue. But to run my fingers between them with a bit of oil was totally mental masturbation for me.

By the time I had finished Allie’s back and covered her legs, I could hear her softly purring like some large kitten; asleep. I watched her for a few moments not wanting to disturb the vision of her in total and complete contentment. But, in truth, I was anxious to feel her hands on my own body. So selfishly I kissed the side of her head and whispered in her ear.

“Turn over sexy.”

Her eyes slowly opened and I could see them trying to focus and come into the present again.

“That…was amazing.” Allie said softly as she began to turn beneath the towel ends without disturbing the manner in which they covered her body. I lifted her head slightly and placed a rolled towel beneath her neck for support. I also placed two beneath her knees for the same reason.

I began with Allie’s neck and worked my way to her shoulders. She began her mantra of ‘mmm’s’ and ‘ahhh’s’ as I went along. When I got to her boobs she began to giggle; especially when I played just the very tip of her nipples which were already erect and engorged.

But the best part was yet to come; her tummy…especially her lower tummy. This was, for some reason beyond my comprehension, her most sensitive and sensual area aside from her vagina. Allie loved to have her tummy rubbed at any time. She could easily become aroused if it was done after dinner and I have actually witnessed her having an orgasm just from the rubbing.

As I began to do her lower tummy, I could actually smell her arousal above the floral scent of the oil. It was a very interesting combination of muskiness and a perfume. I was becoming more than simply stimulated by this aroma. It was nearly overwhelming simply to be touching her so…intimately? But then to add her own little pinch of excitement to the recipe…oh my God!

“Spread your legs a bit sweet heart.” I was already straddling her hips and needed to get lower. I assisted her by un-wrapping her legs from the towel and then covering her upper body again.

I knelt between Allie’s thighs and spread a few drops of oil atop each. As I massaged Allie’s thighs, I couldn’t help but gaze at her ‘coochie’. It was blossoming like a flower; it’s very fleshy petals blossoming opening. I could see a very thin line of moisture glistening down the center. And her clit, which she called her ‘bean’, was engorged and more than poking its head up.

In spite of the moment I had to giggle. I knew that guys often gave their ‘parts’ names but I never knew that girls did that as well. Guys usually gave theirs formal names as if that part had a personality and being of its own. And I imagine that is true because I’d often heard that guys seemed to think with it.

The more I worked Allie’s thighs, the further apart the petals would ‘bloom’ and open until I could almost see within her. The crevasse that formed was rapidly filling with fluid and, I must admit, caused me to think a bit mischievously. I moved my middle finger to the very bottom of her partially opened ‘coochie’ and slowly traced a line up through the fluid forcing it up against the petals.

“Ohhh… My God baby doll… Whatever are you doing?” Allie spoke in a raspy and husky voice. “That feels so…”

She never finished her sentence because my finger was now resting upon her ‘bean’. I wiggled my finger once.

“Oh my God NO…!” Allie’s hands quickly covered mine and held my finger steady. “Don’t move baby.”

She begged as I could feel her pelvic mound quiver. It was the most amazing feeling. But I couldn’t resist and with a giggle I wiggled my finger.

“Oh my God oh my God oh my God…! I’m coming…!” Allie nearly screamed. “Yiiieee…! Ohhh…! God…!” Her thighs closed and hugged me tightly as her body spasmed and buckled inward and I felt fluid flow out of her. “Stop… Stop… Please stop....”

I quickly jerked my hand from her and she quaked one more time. Allie’s eyes were blinking wide open and tightly shut and her mouth was opened as she attempted to catch her breath. I continued to massage her thighs and moved down to her knees as her breathing returned to normal. Allie finally moved her hands back to her sides.

“That…was very sneaky…” She giggled. “And very intense.”

“I couldn’t resist.” I smiled at her. “You know…I could have been really devilish and flicked your bean.” I laughed.

“Yeah… And I could have kicked you in the head on my way down from the ceiling.”

Allie closed her eyes again as I began to work on her calves. I couldn’t resist gazing at her coochie again. It was wide open and had turned a deep pink color. Her bean was sticking almost straight out. Again the imp within me came out. I quickly dove down and, grasping her butt cheeks in my hands, I latched my lips around the nubbin and sucked it as I flicked the very tip with my tongue.

It was as if Allie’s body exploded in movement in a thousand directions and places at once. Her thighs came up and clamped tightly against the side of my head. I felt as if I was enclosed in an envelope of flesh through which no sound could penetrate. She hands came down upon the top of my head and pressed me down further into her. I thought I heard something that sounded like a cross between a scream and hysterical laughter.

After a few moments, which seemed like minutes or longer, I let loose of her bean and blew gently upon it. I could still feel Allie’s body quiver and quake. My mouth was covered in her fluids and I assumed that my breath stimulated her by cooling and drying the wetness that seemed to be everywhere in the small little world of my face and her vagina.

“That…” Allie said between deep breaths of air. “…was not fair.”

Well at least she was smiling.

I couldn’t help but giggle. I actually felt a bit proud of myself. I never considered the fact that I could deliver such intense sexual pleasure to a woman. When we’d been having sex on a regular basis, and for sure it was always amazing, it always seemed that the true end result was not our mutual pleasure as much as Allie wanting to get impregnated?

But now that she was indeed with child, she sex drive seemed to actually increase? And our sexual activities seemed to center more upon the other person’s pleasure. This was a very freeing experience for me. I was not only capable of giving exquisite pleasure to a woman, but I was also able to accept the same in kind.

“Okay buddy…” Allie looked at me with a wry expression on her face. “It’s your turn now.”

“But I haven’t finished.” I spoke with a serious expression that quickly turned into a smiling giggle.

“Oh yes you are. Now…” Allie got to her knees. “Get down there. Hurry up!” She pointed down toward the towel. “And get on your tummy. And you just behave yourself whilst I put more warm water into the carafe.”

I did as Allie requested putting two rolled towels beneath my hips. I rested my head on my arms and closed my eyes. I could still smell Allie’s essence on my mouth and, to be honest, I curled my lip and inhaled deeply. She smelled so…intoxicating. And that aroma was so wonderfully feral. I never imagined I would be this sexually intimate with a woman and now that I was, I wondered if it was the male female thing or this was an exception; an exception named Allie.

I felt the mattress move as Allie got back onto the bed. Now I must admit, Allie has very strong hands, and arms. This is due to her working with clay. Well, if what she did to my neck and shoulder areas was any indication, her clay was well served before going into her kiln. As she worked her way down my back, I began to feel myself leave consciousness. Her touch was firm and her reach into my muscles, what little of them may be, was deep and heavenly.

“Spread your legs a little honey.” I felt Allie shifting down to do my lower back and butt. “You know something?” She spoke as her hands gripped my hips gently. “I think you’re getting a bit shapelier in your hips. And you ass is a lot rounder than it was. I think you’re really looking kind of cute. I think those hormones you’ve been taking are working.”

“Mmmm…” I was still in a half sleep state. Allie began to work on my lower back. That’s where I usually felt stress.

“I can’t wait for you to see Doctor Gotlieb again. I think you’d look so fucking awesome with bigger boobs.” She giggled.

Allie was right. That was the last part, the only part of me that needed…improvement? And then there was the whole legal thingy. I was still very conflicted about that; changing the ‘mister’ to ‘ms’ in my name was an enormous step and it still didn’t feel quite right…yet.

“I love the way your body feels.” Allie crooned as she put a few drops of oil on my butt. “It’s so smooth and…well…curvy?”

That had been a worry for me when we first began to be…us? Allie was accustomed to a more macho type and that usually came accompanied by a more macho body. I was very far from either but Allie really didn’t seem to care. Whatever I was blended well with whoever she was.

Allie suddenly poured several drops of the oil down the crack of my butt. Deep within the recesses of my mind I knew what was coming but she still took me by surprise. Allie began to really dig deep with her finger tips into the muscles of my butt. It hurt but it felt great anyway. She seemed to know where all the little nerve knots were and she attacked each and every one of them.

Then she worked both of her hands down between my butt cheeks and back up again spreading the oil about. Allie then massaged my lower spine with one hand and gently, very gently, with her fingertips, went down the very center of my butt cheeks to the base of my scrotum. She began a motion with her index finger of slowly going up and back down my crack. Each time she’d pass over my butt hole, she would make several circles around it.

24-9 IMG_2032.jpg“Ohhh… Oh God…”
The stimulation was electric. I instinctively jerked my pelvis up to her touch when she did that.

“You like that…don’t you?” Allie lilted as she giggled. Allie slowly began to insert her fingertip into me.


The feeling was exquisite. She pushed in even further as I moaned my approval into the towel. Allie’s other hand continued to massage the small of my back as her finger slowly began to move in and out to the same rhythm of her other hand’s movement.

I was in heaven as a second finger began to enter with the first. Allie pushed in far enough to find that magic spot; my prostate. She began to rub and thump it with her fingertips. I felt her lips kissing my butt cheeks softly. I was paralyzed by the sensations and I felt myself begin to seriously drip.

“Oooo…you’re getting so nice and wet honey.”

She giggled as she grabbed my dick and slowly worked her finger around the head. She kept this treatment up for a few minutes. The intensity was torturously delicious. I wished it would never end. But Allie had other plans.

“Turn over onto your back sweet heart.”

That was not an easy task with her fingers still in me. When I did finally manage to lay flat, she covered me up with the towel sides and slowly withdrew her fingers. Allie made sure I was completely enshrouded in the towel. Only my dick protruded. She placed her scented worn panty over my eyes and nose engulfing me in her fragrance.

“I’ll be right back. I need something to drink.”

I felt her body leave the bed and the patter of her feet across the floor. I was inhaling her aroma and becoming more and more intoxicated. My butt hole was still kind of buzzing from her fingers and my dick was still erect. But my mind was void of anything other than the sensual attack my body was giving me. I was so enrapt that I didn’t hear Allie return.

“Would you like a drink?” She asked sweetly.

All I could do was moan my assent. Allie placed the end of a plastic straw to my lips and I sucked up what was a flavored cold water; orange. When I had my fill she took away the straw and I felt her once again get onto the bed. She uncovered me and dribbled some oil on my upper body.

Once again I felt her powerful fingers massaging my neck and shoulders. I was in a whole other world…another dimension…as Allie worked her magic. I groaned in heavenly delight when she got to my budding breasts. The warmth of the oil and her hands were a salve to my aching boobs and itching nipples.

Allie tweaked, rubbed and pulled gently on my nipples as she gently worked on my boobs with the ham of her hand. Her manipulations seemed to shoot directly to my tummy and then down to my dick at lightning speed. I was so turned on that all I could do is moan and pray that I didn’t orgasm out of seer excitement before her massaging was complete.

“This is so cool.” Allie said with a gleeful voice. “You’re puddling. I’ve never seen you this turned on before.”

She giggled as I moaned. It was true. Allie was bringing me to new heights of excitement.

“I wonder what would happen if I did this.”


I suddenly felt her engulf my entire dick in her mouth. I nearly jumped off the bed in shock.

“Mmmm…” Allie moaned.

She giggled and slowly drew her lips up, lingering for a moment at the head, and then removing her lips with a popping sound. Again my entire body quaked as if an electrical shock was travelling through it.

“That was cool, wasn’t it?”

“Uhhh…” That was all I could say in a weak and wavering voice. “Yeah...”

Allie then poured a few drops of the oil on my tummy and began to work on those muscles.

“You know…your body has really changed a lot since you started taking the hormones.” I felt her hands begin their magic just below my ribs and work in a circular motion. “Your skin is so much smoother and, well, you’re shape is changing; filling out in places that it should.” She giggled as she gently slapped my hips.

Allie began to play with my belly button as she massaged my lower tummy. I moaned softly. I didn’t think she could turn me on any further and yet that was exactly what she was doing. My mind was swirling with these new sensations and to make things even more intense, the back of her hand kept brushing against the head of my dick.

“My baby is so sensitive tonight.” Allie giggled. “I like that. I like that a lot. And to think I’m nowhere near being finished with you.”

I moaned again. Allie poured a bit of oil onto my thighs. But inside of simply massaging them, she raised my legs and placed them with my knees resting on her shoulders. She began to massage them both; one with each hand. The feeling was so totally awesome. I could feel her boobs brushing against the back of my thighs.

She trickled a little oil onto my dick and every few strokes on my thighs was matched with a single slow long stroke of my dick. Some of the oil trickled down the crack of my butt cheeks and Allie chose not to neglect that area either. She ran her fingers down along that crack with one hand as she stroked my dick with the other.

Allie was torturously edging me with powerful waves of pleasure that just fell a wee bit short. I was, literally, on the verge of tears. So great was my need for total relief that all I could think about, between strokes of Allie’s hands, and the scent of her fragrance, and herself, on the panty that covered my eyes and nose, was a nice stiffy up my butt to finish me off.

Allie began to squeeze, caress and palpate my butt cheeks. She teased my butt hole without mercy. Each moan and groan she elicited from me was a muted begging scream to end it all. Allie, with a giggle, knowing quite well how badly she was teasing me, leaned into my thighs. This raised my butt up and off the bed slightly so she could have better access to the area she was massaging; or so I thought. Allie then rammed her strap on vibrator into me in one long thrust!

“OH…MY…GOD…” I screamed as I started to come.

Allie turned on the vibrator and with each spurt of my sperm onto my tummy she would thrust into me until our bodies met. I hooked my heels onto her butt and pulled her in with an increased force. I thought I would never stop coming. I had never come so hard before. I thought my heart would pop out of my chest as Allie pulled on my nipples with each thrust.

My arms flew around her neck as I held on for dear life itself. The world seemed to recede around me until there was only my supremely intense release. I pulled Allie into me one last time and I thought I heard her cry out as I held her to me. Then, just after I peaked, I seemed to have lost consciousness.

When the world came back into focus, Allie’s smiling face came into view. She kissed me and I kissed her back. I put all the emotion, all the love I felt for her into that kiss. We both parted lips almost at the same time.

“I was beginning to worry about you.”

I could hear the concern in her voice. I was so overcome with so many different and wonderful feelings for her that I began to cry.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah…” I managed to squeak out between sniffles. “I love you.”

“Yeah…” She giggled. “So I’ve noticed.”

“That was…amazing.”

“You should have felt it from this end.” She laughed. “When you held me to you that final time…it was like…oh my God!!! The vibrator would let me stop coming. That was definitely amazing. I don’t think I’ve ever come so hard or so many times so quickly before.” Allie kissed my cheek and rested her head against my shoulder. “I love you very much Andi.”

“I think I love being your…wife?” I giggled. “But I think I also love being your husband.”

I quickly rolled over on top of Allie and latched onto her nipple with my lips. She squealed with delight and kind of curled up beneath me. I parted her thighs with my leg. I could feel her wetness…her swampiness…on my own thigh. In two simultaneous motions I let go of her distended nipple with a popping sound and latched onto her mouth, and my hand went down to her swampy vagina in search of her not so elusive ‘bean’.

The very moment I touched the nubbin…

24-10 IMG_2033.jpg…Allie screamed into my mouth.
She tried to curl up even more but I fought her with gentle strokes of her clit. She was so very overcome with the rolling waves of her orgasms that her entire body froze. It was all she could do to moan into my mouth. I relished the manner she held onto me and with each wave of forced pleasure the tightening of her body around mine.

Finally, when Allie simply couldn’t take any more, her lips left mine. Her entire body fell back upon the bed and she pushed me off of her. Allie was breathing heavily and her wide opened eyes had a glazed look.

“Please…” She said weakly. “No more…”

I leaned down and softly kissed her forehead. Her hair was matted with perspiration. I stroked her tummy softly and smiled at her.

“I think I like playing the husband too.” I giggled.

Allie, still breathing heavily smiled up at me. I repositioned myself to rest beside her, my head upon her thigh and snuggled up close on my side. I could smell Allie’s sweet aroma as her leaked fluid dried in the air. Everything about this woman was intoxicating.

“That…” Allie giggled. “…was amazing. I don’t think I’ve every cum that much.”

Allie rolled on her side and began to gently stroke my dick. And as she did I pried open her legs and gently blew my breath upon her vagina.

“You know…?” Allie said as she flicked her tongue across the head of my dick. “Maybe we should keep this little guy active.”

“Does that mean I get husband’s rights too?”

“I don’t see why not.” Allie chuckled. “We’re both already wives.”

24-11 IMG_2035.jpgAllie snuggled up behind me…as usual.
We had no trouble sleeping at all…at all!

Does Andi become Allie’s wife? Does Allie become Andi’s wife? Will either one qualify as a husband? Will Andi keep his boy junk? Will Allie keep his boy junk? Will someone please clean the damn bath tub? And what about Midnight the cat…? To find out who’s on first and what’s on second…visit the Baseball Hall of Fame. Otherwise…read the next chapters of the adventures of ‘Andi and Allie’.

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