The Punishment

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What had I gotten myself into? The phone was ringing and I knew it was my friend Keri. As usual, I ran down the hall from my bedroom at one end of the house to the phone in the guest bedroom at the other end. The sound of my footfalls was deceptively loud on the oriental “runner” style rug that adorned the dark-stained hardwood floor. I always ran right past my sister Tara’s bedroom door on my way to answer the phone.
She had just picked up a large laundry basket of clothes to take them downstairs to the laundry room. She heard me coming down the hall but misjudged how far away I was and thought she could hurry past before I got to her door. She darted out of her room and I slammed into her, knocking her clear off her feet and sending her basket of clothes all over the place. I decided to help my sister up instead of answering the phone. Keri would have no trouble understanding that decision. I apologized to Tara immediately and profusely, making sure she was all right
and helping her pick up her clothes. Tara was okay, but she had a couple of bruises and was shaken up a bit. She wasn’t angry with me because she knew it had been a silly accident and she knew that she could have waited for me to pass. She even smirked at me. She knew how much I liked Keri and she knew that she had run clear across the house from the living room in front to the kitchen in back to answer the phone for a boy herself.

Our mother stormed onto the scene to see what the commotion was. When she saw Tara’s bruises she had a fit.
“What is going on?? Tara, what happened to you??”
“It was just a silly accident, Mom. I’m all right.”
“What happened here? Kelly, explain yourself this instant!”
“I was running down the hall to answer the phone because I knew it was Keri. Tara came out of her room right as I was running past and I knocked her over. I’m sorry, Tara.”
“It’s okay, Kelly. It was just an accident. I could have waited for you to pass, you know!”
“Oh, Kelly! What I have told you about running around the house? You’re lucky you didn’t split her head open.”
“Mom, I’m sorry, really it was just a case of bad luck--”
“Bad luck, my butt! If you weren’t shooting down the hall you wouldn’t have knocked your sister over. You’re always running around the house knocking things over! Last week it was the lamp in the living room. Yesterday it was the vase in the hall. Now your sister’s all bruised —- and just look at Tara’s tights! They’ve got a big run in them; they’re ruined!”
“I’m sorry, Tara.”
“Honestly, Kelly, I don’t know what to do with you!”

From out of nowhere, a wry smile took over her face.

“Actually, Kelly, I know exactly what to do with you.”

Whoa, that can’t be good!

“I know what will make you slow down -- and your shoulder length hair is perfect for what I have I mind!”

Tara and I exchanged puzzled looks.

“Tara, honey, take your laundry downstairs now, please.”
“Okay, Mom.”

Ever since I had begun refusing haircuts five years earlier, Mom had warned me that I could get into trouble with bullies for growing my hair so long. Ironically, it wasn’t bullies I had to worry about!

Mom marched me up to my other sister Chrissy’s room. Tara was wondering what the hell mom was doing. She hurried down to the laundry room, dropped her laundry basket on the floor, and scurried back upstairs to find out what Mom was going to do to me. Chrissy was in her room reading a non-fiction book about astronomy and looked up to see Mom dragging me into her room, followed very shortly by Tara. Chrissy saw that she was sporting a couple of angry bruises and a humongous run in her tights.

“What’s happening, you guys?”

I tried to defend myself.

“It was an accident--”
“Oh, stop it, just stop it! Tara got hurt because you went running down the hall again, pure and simple. I’ve had enough and I’m going to put a stop to it for good!”

Mother strode over to Chrissy’s closet and began looking through her dresses.

“Mom? What are you doing in Chrissy’s closet?”
“That will be very clear in a moment, Tara.”

Chrissy put a hand over her mouth to conceal her giggle. She knew what Mom was going to do. She also knew something that Mom and Tara didn’t.

* * * * *

Two years earlier, she had walked into her room and found me dressed as a girl from head to toe wearing everything but makeup and nail polish. I was wearing her white dress with the pretty lavender floral pattern on it. I was wearing her white nylon tights and her white, patent leather flats. I had braided my long hair in twin braids and I was wearing her gold locket.
I didn’t hear her come in. She was stunned and stood rooted to the spot, watching me admire myself in the mirror, turning this way and that. I was in the middle of a 360 degree turn when I saw her there and stopped in my tracks. I gasped and ran over to close the door behind her.

“Um… hi, Chrissy, um…” At that point I suffered verbal diarrhea. “I’m sorry I came in here and borrowed your pretty clothes without your permission. I’m so embarrassed! I hope you won’t tell anyone about this. You won’t, will you? I will die if you tell anyone. I’ll never be able to live it down--”

Now Chrissy was beginning to relax… and giggle.

“I won’t tell. I’m just… well, very surprised. Boys don’t usually like wearing girls’ clothes. I knew your hair looked girly, but… wow, you’re even wearing tights!”
“Yes, I’m wearing tights, too.”
“How long have you liked wearing girls’ clothes?”
“A few years now. I started out just putting on a pair of your tights. A couple of years after that, your dresses and panties and other stuff started fitting, too.”

She began to gently taunt me.

“You’re definitely wearing my bra. Are you wearing my panties, too?”

I looked down at my feet.

“Yes. I’m wearing panties, too.”
“How come you like to dress as a girl?”
“I don’t know, really. I just like girls a lot. I love everything about girls from tights to braids to Mary Janes to dresses to they way they’re not afraid to talk about their feelings and more. I think it’s wonderful they can be so strong and brave on the inside but still so soft and pretty on the outside. It’s like you have the best of both worlds. Boys could never do that —- but I want to. I want to be strong on the inside and pretty on the outside.”

As a girl, she was flattered to hear those things and she couldn’t help smiling.

“I didn’t know you thought so well of the other gender. I am impressed. Well, you look very pretty in my dress. It’s okay with me if you like to dress as a girl. I mean, it’s not like you’re on drugs or… robbing liquor stores or something.”
“That’s what I figured, too. It could be a lot worse.”
“Well, you can stay in here with me and keep the clothes on if you want to, but Mom’s coming upstairs soon to take a nap, so be careful.”
“Thank you so much for accepting me the way I am, Chrissy. You have no idea what this means to me.”

I gave her a big hug and it made her giggle.

“You’re welcome.”

Suddenly, we heard Mom’s voice through the door, calling Kelly's name.

“Oh, shit!”

We both looked over at the door. I grabbed my clothes and ran into my sister’s bathroom. Mom opened Chrissy’s door right after I shut the bathroom door. I changed back into my clothes as fast as I could and put my hair back in its usual pony tail.

“Chrissy, have you seen Kelly? He was supposed to take out the trash.”
“Oh, yeah, he’s in my bathroom. I took his band-aids this morning and he was looking for them.”
“Why has he got the door closed?”

She gave her mother a how-the-fuck-should-I-know look.

“I don’t know. Maybe he had to go?”

I heard the conversation while I was dressing myself and almost laughed. I hung up Chrissy’s dress on the back of the door and put her tights and underwear in her hamper. I found a pin in Chrissy’s bathroom and used it to prick my finger. Then I put a band-aid on it. I flushed the toilet and I walked out of the bathroom as calmly as I could with my box of band-aids.

“Hi, Mom. I’ll do the trash now.”
“What happened to your finger?”
“I pricked it with a pin when I was picking it up off of the hall floor so that nobody would step on it. That’s why I was looking for my band-aids.”
“Where did you put the pin?”
“I have it right here.”

I handed it over to Mom.

“All right, I’ll dispose of that. Will you take care of the trash for me, please?”
“Sure, mom!”
“Thank you, sweetie.”

Mom turned around and left to take her nap. When she was gone, I thanked Chrissy for covering for me.

“Would you like to put my clothes back on until she wakes up? It’s okay with me. I really like seeing you as a girl!”
“I would like to… but I think I’ve had enough close calls for one day.”
“Yeah, I guess so.”

She looked a bit disappointed.

“I’ll tell you what, Chrissy. Next time I want to get dressed up, I’ll come and get you and we can have some fun. It really won’t be very long until I do.”

We began tittering and her face brightened up.

“That would be fun! Could I put makeup and nail polish on you -- and do your hair?”
“Sure. I’d like that!”

True to my word, I did come and get Chrissy whenever I wanted to be dressed as a girl and she was always very happy to help me.

* * * * *

Tara and Chrissy and I stared with wide open eyes as my mother pulled out Chrissy’s white, cotton, floral knee-length jumper dress with the form-fitting bodice. After she laid it on Chrissy’s bed, Mom got out a white turtleneck and Chrissy’s black leather Mary Janes with a full-width two-inch heel. Mom laid those clothes on the bed and then opened Chrissy’s dresser drawer. She pulled out a white satin bra, matching panties and a pair of white, semi-sheer girls’ tights. Tara’s eyes were the size of small pizzas and Chrissy was struggling hard not to laugh since she knew that Mom’s ‘punishment’ would be no such thing to me! Tara was shocked that her mother was making me dress up as a girl even though Tara had never even been angry with me —- and had been partly at fault!

“All right, young lady. Strip off your boy clothes!”

I put on my best sulking face to hide my enjoyment of Mom’s “punishment”.

“Okay. Um, girls, would you mind turning around, please?”

Slowly, they turned around so I could get changed. I took off all of my boy clothes and put on the panties and the bra. Mom made me sit down at Chrissy’s vanity.

“Tara, honey, get out Chrissy’s pretty pink nail polish and start putting it on your new sister.”
“Okay, Mom.”

Tara hated the idea of doing something so embarrassing to me over a stupid accident —- since she didn’t know how much I loved being turned into a girl -- but she decided it would be most unwise to question her mother’s orders. She got out the nail polish and did my nails while Mom French braided my hair in a beautiful braid down my neck and finished it off with a white ribbon.

“There! While your nail polish is drying, I’ll do your make up for you. Tara will you use the blow-dryer on Michelle’s toes, please?”

"Michelle?" Tara wondered aloud.

"Yes. That's what I would have named her if she'd been born a girl. Start with the polish, now!"

“Okay, Mom.”

She put pink lipstick on me that was pretty much the same color as my natural lips. Then she touched me up with a bit of eyeliner and mascara.

“That’s all the make up Chrissy and Tara get to wear so that’s all you’re getting, too.”
“Oh, yeah, I’m sure he’s really, really bummed out that he can’t wear more makeup than his sisters!”
“Tara, please don’t start.”
“Fine, Mom.”
“Is the nail polish dry?”
“Yeah, it’s dry.”
“Okay, Michelle, time to put your tights on!”

Mom came over and slipped the tights on one leg to just past my knee and did the same with the other leg.

“Stand up!”
“Okay.”

I stood up obediently for her as she pulled the tights all the way up to my waist. I loved tights more than any other type of girls’ clothing. To me, tights were the ultimate female thing to wear. They felt so good —- I wished that I didn’t have to suppress my feelings!

“Next is the turtleneck. Hold your arms up, please!”

I held them up dutifully as she gently pulled the shirt over my head. She smoothed it out nicely before picking up the dress.

“Arms up again, please!”

Again I held up my arms without answering her. I was going to enjoy my punishment very much —- if she didn’t make me leave the house! She slipped the dress on over the turtleneck and zipped it up. The only thing missing were the shoes and maybe some jewelry.

“I’ll help you put your Mary Janes on.”
“Okay, Mom.”

She strapped the shoes on me and did the buckles. I could have done that easily but I wasn’t ready for her to know about Michelle. She went over to Chrissy’s vanity and got a gold ring with three very small sapphires on it, a pair of small hoop clip-on earrings and the very same gold locket I’d been wearing when Chrissy caught me wearing her clothes.

After she was done, she walked me over to Chrissy’s full length mirror to see myself. I looked very pretty. I felt good being dressed as a girl, but I didn’t show it; I didn’t want Mom to catch on.

“All right, girls. Get in the car. We’re going shopping.”

Now my face went white. I had never left the house dressed as a girl. I had wanted to, but I had never been able to because I was always too nervous. I had thought about going out in the back yard on a couple of occasions while Mom was out, but as soon as I got near the back door, I would start trembling and lose my nerve completely. Tara made a last ditch attempt to save me from further embarrassment.

“Mom, for god sake, it was just a stupid accident. Why are you doing this?”
“You heard what I said about that ‘accident’.”
“But, Mom--”
“Tara, Go put on another pair of tights, please.”

Tara sighed with resignation.

“All right.”

Tara did as she was asked while we walked downstairs to get our coats. She chose a pair of white tights to show her support for me. She caught up with us while we were putting our coats on and grabbed her own. As Mom put her hand on the front door to open it, she had another thought.
“You know, we'd better pretend that Michelle is your cousin while we're out - and later on, too. It's just a safer cover story if we need one.”

"Okay," we chorused in response.

When Mom turned her back to open the front door, Tara looked over at me and whispered to me.

“This sucks, Kelly!”
“It’s okay, Tara.”

We stopped whispering just in time to prevent Mom from catching us.

“Let’s go, girls!”

I liked being referred to as a girl — at least in the safety of our house -- but we were going out in public! I began trembling again as we stepped outside and Mom locked the door behind us. I did not want to do this, but I knew I had no choice. All I could do was take some deep breaths and try to relax. Chrissy and Tara held my hands as we walked out to the car at the curb. They could tell how nervous I was by the way I was gripping their hands. I looked at my feet all the way to the car, too nervous to look around in case someone was out there staring at me.
The drive was uneventful. When we arrived, we had to park about fifty feet from the edge of the lot and I knew that I would have to walk across the lot with my family dressed as a girl and completely out in the open. When we got out of the car, my mouth began to go dry and my heart rate sped up. Chrissy and Tara both hooked an arm in mine and we walked together across the parking lot.

It was a single-level mall with outdoor corridors. Only the stores themselves were indoors. It was a bit of a long walk to the other end of the corridor and all of the people along the way could see me dressed as a girl. I felt like I was being paraded through the entire mall. I tried not to look at anyone and I prayed they wouldn’t look at me. I wished that I could just go home.

We walked into the department store at the far end of the mall and headed to the girls’ department. They had everything from skirts to swimsuits to underwear and everything in between. We walked over to an area full of skirts and tops and Mom picked out a bunch of things for me to try on. We walked into the ladies’ changing rooms and she had me try them on. I tried on a bunch of skirts and tops and Mom made me model them for my sisters.

When we’d picked out eight skirts and eight tops, we rang them up. My mother told the cashier they were for me. I smiled like a girl having fun, following the advice that Chrissy had surreptitiously given me on the way out of the changing rooms. I really wasn’t feeling it. I would just have to hope I looked convincing enough.

Mom led us onward to the dress section. She picked out two very pretty dresses and marched me to the ladies’ changing rooms again to try them on. She handed me a nylon full slip to put on, so I took off my jumper and turtleneck and put on the slip. Then she handed me a dress. This one was velvet, short sleeved, and burgundy. It had a strip of velvet with flowers on it across the waist and a similar strip around the collar. I put it on over the slip. It fit nicely. The dress and slip went down to about my calves. I was glad Mom was good at judging the sizes for me because I wanted to go home as soon as possible. I couldn’t help feeling nervous. Nobody had noticed me on the way in but I still didn’t like being dressed as a girl in public.

“Ooh! That’s pretty!”
“Chrissy’s right — I love it, too!”
“Good. That makes three of us.”
“How about you, Michelle? Do you like your new dress?”

I could hear other girls in there chatting about the clothes they were trying on and I realized that my silence could be heard as loudly as my voice. I decided I’d better play along.

“Yes, Mom. I love it!”
“That’s my girl!”
“Try this one now.”

I took off the pretty burgundy velvet dress and put on another formal dress with an emerald green, velvet bodice and emerald green organza sleeves and skirt. The skirt was about the same length as the last dress.

“Gee, Michelle, you sure are lucky to be getting all these pretty clothes.”

Again, I decided to play the part to convince every one else in the dressing room, just in case.

“I sure am, Chrissy! Thank you so much, Mom!”

I wasn’t smiling, but I made myself sound as though I were.

We left the dressing rooms again, dresses and slip in hand, and rang them up. My mother couldn’t help telling the cashiers she was buying the dresses for me. At least she wasn’t telling them that I was a boy in a dress!

Now we went to the shoe department. They had various shoes on sale, and Mom picked out four pairs in various colors to go with my outfits, including black, canvas Mary Janes with flowers embroidered on the toes. She also picked out a pair of black, leather, heeled Mary Janes similar to the ones I was wearing and a pair of black velvet heeled shoes that were a more open variation of Mary Janes with just the sole between the heel and toe. I tried all the shoes on until we found my size in everything. We rang everything up after telling two more cashiers the shoes were for me.
Mom herded us over to the lingerie section and picked out eight pairs of bras and panties, eight pairs of nylon semi-sheer tights, two pairs of pantyhose, eight nightgowns, a bathrobe and a pair of slippers. The bathrobe and slippers were pink, but everything else was in various colors. We rang it all up again, and oh yes it was all for me.

Next, we picked up a gold necklace with a small butterfly pendant on it, gold hoop clip-on earrings similar to Chrissy’s, a gold ring and a faux pearl set with earrings, necklace and bracelet.

It was finally time to go home. We walked back down the length of the open corridor. Halfway to the parking lot, I saw a familiar face coming towards me. It was Keri! Oh no! She’s going to see me dressed as a girl! She’s not going to want to have anything to do with me now! I really hope she doesn’t tell anyone. Chrissy and Tara looked at each other, silently reminding each other that I was their cousin Michelle. Keri began to wave at us as she approached.

As she came closer, I wondered if she would be convinced if I pretended not to know her. Then I decided that I didn’t want to hide anything from her. She was such a nice girl that I couldn’t bear to lie to her. Besides, I wanted to say hello to her even if I was dressed as a girl. I liked her enough to risk it.

I gave her my usual smile, instantly revealing myself to her. Keri stopped dead in her tracks. She was shocked to see me dressed up as a girl. She wondered what the hell was going on. She knew my smile well enough that she could tell I was rather uncomfortable being dressed as a girl in public. She figured that I was probably very embarrassed. She decided to save me from more of the same and kept her composure as she took the last couple of steps towards us.

“Hi, everyone!”
“Hi, Keri. It’s nice to see you.”
“So, er…”

Keri didn’t know what name to use and Chrissy decided that she’d better introduce Michelle to Keri to make us all look convincing.

“Oh, you haven’t met! Keri, this is our cousin Michelle. Michelle, this is our friend Keri.”
“Hi, Michelle. It’s nice to meet you. So, what’s… going on? Where’s Kelly?”
“Would you like to tell her, dear?”

Thanks a lot, Mom! Damn you!

“Yes, I’ll tell her.”

I turned to Keri to explain myself.

“Kelly is being punished for knocking over his sister while running to answer the phone when you tried to call earlier today. That’s where Tara got her bruises, the poor girl. Anyway, Kelly was obviously excited to talk to you, but he decided he should help his sister up and help her pick up all the clothes that she had been carrying.”

Keri was touched that I’d been so eager to hear from her and impressed that I’d chosen to help my sister up instead of just leaving her to answer the phone. Mom, however, wanted to make sure I didn’t get away with leaving anything out.

“And?”

I figured that a girl my age would get a kick out of her male cousin getting in trouble and I put a smug look on my face.

“Before that, he accidentally broke a few things around the house because he’s always running around — usually to answer the phone when you call. Anyway, he’s in pretty big trouble. I bet he regrets it now!”
“I see.”

Keri knew that she wouldn’t have recognized me if I hadn’t given her my usual puppy smile and thus I could have kept my embarrassing punishment secret from her. Yet, I had revealed myself to her, and that told her that I must trust her with my secret. She was flattered and impressed and gave me a nice smile… but carefully, considering the circumstances. Her smile had the kind of subtlety one could only see from up close.

“I guess Kelly will have to be more careful. He sure is a brave guy, by the way.”

I thought she was talking about the fact that I was dressed as a girl in public and didn’t want to dishonestly take credit where I didn’t deserve any. It wasn’t my idea to be doing this.

“Well, um, it wasn’t a choice.”
“I didn’t ever have to know. That was a choice.”
“I guess so.”
“I know so.”

She gave me another subtle smile that melted my heart. Well, um… you probably need to be going. I guess I’ll see you all later.” She looked directly at me.

“It was nice to see you!”
“It was nice to see you too, Keri!”

She surreptitiously gave my arm a reassuring squeeze as she walked past me. As we continued on our way, I turned around to look at her and she smiled at me. I smiled back at her.

As we walked back across the parking lot, I was feeling a strange mix of pleasant light-headedness and nervous tension. I was very worried that someone would know that I was a boy in a dress —- and tights.

Finally we made it to the car and got in. During the ride home, Mom laid down the rules of my punishment.

“All right, Michelle. Today is Wednesday. From now until Monday morning, you are a girl. Everyone is to call you Michelle until your punishment is over. If you behave yourself until then, you can go back to being a boy. If you damage any of your new clothes, you will stay a girl for another week. Meanwhile, you will wear a pair of those tights I bought you each day. Those semi-sheer tights get runs in them if you bump into things, so if you want to avoid further punishment then you will just have to slow down. Do you have any questions?”
“No, Mom.”
“Good. I hope you’ll learn from your punishment. I got the idea when I saw Tara’s ruined tights after you went running around and knocked her over. That was when I realized that I could teach you to be more careful by making you wear tights.”

Whoa. Talk about Karma! Tara wasn’t satisfied.

“Why not just make her wear tights under a pair of her shorts? Why does she have to be completely dressed up?”
“I thought she might cheat by wearing jeans over her tights. I wanted to be sure that’s not a possibility. The best way to prevent cheating and ensure that she’ll stop running around is to turn her into a girl for a few days. Besides, having her dressed up completely may well come in handy in case anyone stops by unexpectedly.”

When we got home, Mom told me to put away my new clothes in the extra closet in my room. The extra closet had once been an open alcove, but evidently some previous owners had a lot of clothes and decided to convert it into a second walk-in closet. I really didn’t know why Mom was making me put my clothes in the extra closet. My main closet still had room to spare. That puzzled me, but I supposed that she was simply keeping the boys’ clothes and girls’ clothes separate. I left it at that and did as she asked.

A couple of minutes later, I had put away everything except the lingerie and robe when Mom came into my room dressed in jeans and a cable knit sweater. She was followed by Chrissy and Tara, who just had to find out what else Mom was going to do to me. Mom had brought up all of my boy clothes from the laundry room. She walked over to my walk-in closet and placed them inside. Next, she walked over to my dresser and transferred its entire contents into the closet, drawer by drawer. After a quick check under my bed, she locked the closet door and put the key in her pocket. All of my boy clothes were now locked in my walk-in closet and I didn’t have the key! This was the first time I’d ever been truly stuck as a girl.

“Remember, you’re a girl until Monday — if you behave. Oh, and one more thing. If I catch you borrowing boys’ clothes from anyone, you’ll be a girl for a month. Understood?”
“Yes, Mom.”

Aw, shit! I hope to hell nothing goes wrong. I can’t stay in the house for a whole month and I really don’t want to go out in public dressed like a girl again!

“Good. I’ll be downstairs.”

Mom left the room. None of us spoke. I was happy to wear girls’ clothes for the next few days. Now that I was home, I was enjoying being a girl again. In fact, I was very excited to have such a great excuse to be a girl for a while, as long as I didn’t have to leave the house dressed as a girl. I fingered my new clothes and smiled. I had been too scared to feel anything for them at the store but at home I was relaxed and I could enjoy browsing through them. I was very happy to have them!

I decided to change because I wanted to wear my new clothes and that way I could return Chrissy’s stuff to her. I got out a floral pair of panties and the white bra that matched.

“Girls, would you mind waiting in the hall while I change?”
“Not at all.”
“Thanks.”

My sisters went out into the hall and closed the door behind them. I removed Chrissy’s clothes and donned my new underwear. I slipped on a pair of my own white tights, smiling at my pretty painted toes, and pulled on my denim skirt. I completed my outfit with a floral cotton t-shirt with a scoop neck and long sleeves. Then I put on my black canvas Mary Janes with the flowers embroidered on the toes. Finally, I traded Chrissy’s jewelry for my own.

I opened the door, let my sisters back into my room and returned Chrissy’s things to her. She went to her room, plopped her things on her bed, and returned to my room. The door to the extra closet was still wide open and I looked at myself in the full length mirror mounted on the inside of the door. Tara noticed that I was smiling at my reflection, adjusting my hair.

“Michelle, why are you smiling?”

I glanced at the door to try to see if Mom was within earshot, but I wasn’t sure, so I looked back at Tara and silently winked at her instead. Chrissy had to fight hard not to bust out laughing lest Mom hear her. Tara turned to look at her and understood that Chrissy and I clearly knew something that Tara and Mom didn’t. Tara looked back at me and saw that I was still smiling. She wondered if I liked being dressed up as a girl and looked at Chrissy with a questioning expression on her face. Chrissy simply nodded her head, giggling softly. Until that moment, Tara had no idea that I was actually enjoying being a girl!

Tara looked back at me and saw my French braided hair. Now that she knew I loved dressing up as a girl, she realized that was the reason I’d grown my hair as long as a girl. But I had grown my hair years ago. Tara remembered how steadily I had been walking in Chrissy’s heels while we were at the mall. Nobody walks steadily in heels the first time they put them on. She knew that I had worn heels many times before.

“You’ve been dressed as a girl before, haven’t you?” Tara whispered to keep her voice down.

I nodded my head and smiled at her. Her mouth opened wide and then she, too, had to fight to keep herself from laughing out loud. She was very surprised to learn that her brother was an avid cross-dresser, but she was relieved that my punishment wasn’t torture after all. As long as that was the case, she found the whole thing hysterically funny!

Tara needed to know more, and she closed the door to keep our conversation private.

“Does Mom know?”
“No. Just us —- and probably Keri.” I sighed with resignation.
“Chrissy, how long have you known?”
“I’ve known for a couple of years now -- ever since I caught Michelle dressed up as a pretty girl.”
“Really? That’s so funny!”
“Yes. You should have seen her face when she saw me standing there staring at her. Actually, you did when Mom told us to get in the car. That was the one!”

We were all starting to laugh. I explained to Tara everything I’d told Chrissy. Tara liked my reasons as much as Chrissy had.
The phone interrupted our bonding session. Mom called up the stairs to tell me who it was.

“Michelle, darling, it’s Keri on the phone!”
“Thanks, Mom!”

My sisters headed downstairs while I hurried over to the phone again, but this time I wasn’t running. I didn’t dare damage my new clothes. The sooner my punishment was over, the lower the likelihood that I would have to leave the house dressed as a girl. I just couldn’t go out in public again dressed as a girl. The last time I did that, I ran into Keri! Sure, she was nice about it, but the next time I might be found out by someone not quite as nice as Keri —- someone who might tell everyone at school —- or worse! I grabbed the phone, excited to talk to Keri.

“Hi, Keri! It’s good to hear from you. Were you surprised to meet Michelle?”
“Oh my god, yes! I was shocked to see you, but I loved it, too! I just wish I’d gotten more of a look at you — not to mention a picture!”
“Yeah, I bet you do!”
“That’s why I’m calling, actually. I’d love it if Michelle would come over and visit with me and let me take a few pictures of her.”

Pictures? Holy hell no!

“Well, um… you know that I’d be glad to visit you, but Michelle still feels too nervous to leave the house or have her picture taken. She’s afraid her secret would come out. If she’d had a choice earlier today, she wouldn’t have been out then either.”
“I really want to see Michelle again. She was so sweet. We’ll be alone here and I promise not to tell anyone or show anyone the pictures!”
“You really like Michelle the way she is?”
“Yes, I really do! She’s great!”
“Wow… Michelle doesn’t think she can do this… and with pictures…”
“Well, she’s just going to have to. If she doesn’t, so help me God, everyone at school will know who she is.”

Oh, God, anything but that!

“You wouldn’t really do that, would you?”
“Wouldn’t I?”

I was almost certain that Keri was too nice to do anything like out me to the whole school, and she probably just wanted to have some fun seeing me dressed as a girl again, but sometimes people can surprise you in nasty ways. Well, we would be alone at her house and I didn’t think that she would really tell. She liked Michelle… and I liked her.

“Well… okay. For you, Michelle will come for a visit. What time would you like her to come?”
“Are you available now?”
“Yeah, sure. Michelle is on her way.”
“Great! I’m so glad you’re coming! I’ll see you soon!”
“See you soon.”

I hung up the phone and walked downstairs to find Mom. She was in the family room chatting with my sisters.

“Hi, everyone.”
“Michelle, darling, look at you! You look beautiful!”

I tilted my head sheepishly.

“Thank you.”
“So what can we do for you, dear girl?”
“Keri has invited Michelle over for a visit and I wanted to check with you to see if I’m allowed to walk over to her house in my boy clothes.”
“Absolutely not. You’re a girl until Monday. If you’re going to Keri’s house then you’re going as a girl. Personally, I think you should go anyway. You look wonderful.”
“Okay, Mom. Well, I guess I’m on my way.”
“Remember the rules. Damage your clothes and you’ll be a girl for another week. Borrow boy clothes from anyone and you’ll be a girl for a month.”
“I remember the rules, believe me.”
“All right, honey, you’d better be on your way. You wouldn’t want to keep that gorgeous girl Keri waiting, now would you?”
“No, I wouldn’t. I’ll be back for dinner, I guess.”
“Okay, see you then!”
“Michelle, wait, let me look at your makeup!”
“Oh, thanks, Chrissy!”
“Sure. We girls have got to stick together! Come on!”

A couple of minutes later, my makeup was fresh and I was ready to go. I thanked Chrissy again and headed for the door.

“Bye, everyone!”
“Bye, Michelle!”

I stood at the front door, steeling myself to open it. I still didn’t want to be seen in public dressed as a girl… or did I? I had felt a strange relief when Mom denied me the use of my boy clothes. I realized that it wasn’t being dressed as a girl in public that scared me. I did want to be a girl in public. It was the idea of being found out that filled my stomach with butterflies. Still, I was so nervous that I considered canceling. However, the thought of seeing Keri again was enough to overpower my nerves. I took a slow, deep breath, opened the front door, and stepped outside.

It was a nice, sunny day but I still couldn’t relax. I hoped that nobody would recognize me. A few cars passed by as well as a few joggers and people out for a walk with their dogs. I always got tense as someone passed but I made myself smile as they did. I wished I could stop being nervous because I knew I would be enjoying the walk if not for that, but I was as nervous as ever.

I walked up to Keri’s door and rang the bell. She answered almost immediately.

“Wow, Michelle, you look so cute! I love your outfit! Is that yours?”
“Thanks, Keri. Yes, it’s one of my new outfits we bought at the mall.”

I blushed as I walked inside and she closed the door. I felt better right away, but I dreaded the thought of Keri taking pictures of me dressed as a girl, and I still could not relax.

“Wow. You have to go through all of this for a stupid accident and a couple of broken things? Whatever happened to taking it out of your allowance?”
“Yeah and you know what else? My mom had me put my new girl clothes in my extra closet. Then she put all of my boy clothes in my main closet, locked the door and kept the key! There’s no other key, either! Until Monday morning, I am a girl named Michelle; no exceptions. I have to wear tights every day during the punishment and if I damage any of my clothes I’ll be a girl for another week. If I borrow any boy clothes it’ll be another month. Talk about overkill.”
“Oh, Jesus! Well, let’s grab some Diet Coke and head up to my room.”
“That sounds good to me.”

She couldn’t get over how cute I looked. She loved seeing my legs in tights as much as I loved wearing them. She seemed quite comfortable with the idea of a boy being dressed as a girl and I decided I could trust her with the rest of my secret. I confided everything to her that I’d told Chrissy and then Tara.

“Wow. You really do like being a girl, don’t you?”
“Yes, I really do. Listen, Keri, is there any way you might reconsider taking pictures of me dressed as a girl? It’s honestly not that I don’t trust you. It’s that accidents do happen —- as I found out the hard way —- and sometimes things get out that weren’t intended to.”
“I’m sorry, Michelle. I hope you don’t think I’m a bitch, but I just can’t resist.”
“I don’t think you’re a bitch.”
“Thanks for saying so. Don’t worry, Michelle. These will live in a hidden folder on my hard drive. I promise not to share them with anyone outside this room without your permission.”

My instincts told me she could be trusted.

“Okay. You can take some pictures of me.”
“Thank you!”

She smiled at me and gave me a hug! She got out her camera and took ten pictures of me in different poses. At one point, she had me walk outside into her back yard so that she could take some pictures out there as well. My heart was pounding the whole time. After she was done, we went back upstairs to her room and she loaded the new pictures onto her computer so that we could look at them. I loved the way I looked, but I couldn’t feel comfortable knowing that these pictures existed.

Keri showed me some of her favorite dresses and even had me try on some of them. She put my hair up in a formal style and we played dress-up for a good hour. Eventually, she began dressing up, too. I was wearing a pretty salmon party dress and Keri was wearing a medium blue one that matched her eyes. She looked absolutely gorgeous. She decided to show me a black, strapless sequined number and removed the blue one right in front of me, so that she was in her bra and panties. She forgot that the black dress had a built-in bra and she was going to have to remove the bra she was wearing to put it on. She had just started walking to the bathroom to finish changing when her mother walked in on us.

“Keri, I’m home, sweetheart. Dinner’s in an hour.”

My face paled as Keri whirled around to talk to her mother.

“Hi, Mom! Weren’t you supposed to be out late tonight?”

I forced myself to smile. Keri had to convince her mother that I was a girl and she had an idea how to do it. There are certain things that a girl’s mother wouldn’t dream of her doing in front of a boy. Keri took off her bra and put the dress on right where she stood as if it were the most natural thing in the world. I had looked over to see what she was doing, and when I realized what she was up to I looked back at her mother so I wouldn’t get turned on. I hoped like hell that her mother would think we were just a couple of girls playing dress up.

“Yes, some of my plans fell through at the last minute.”
“Oh, okay.”
“I see you’ve got someone over! Hello, there!”
“Hello.”
“Mom, this is my new friend Michelle.”
“It’s so nice to meet you, Michelle.”
“It’s nice to meet you too.”
“Well, you’re certainly welcome to stay for dinner if you’d like! Why don’t you two girls talk it over?”
“Thanks, Mom! We will!”
“Yes, thanks for inviting me!”
“You’re very welcome!”

Keri’s mother left the room and Keri gently closed the door.

“Crap! I’m so sorry, Michelle. She wasn’t supposed to be back until midnight. If I had known she was coming home early I would have suggested some other time, I swear! I can’t believe we didn’t hear her come in -- and I promised we’d be alone. I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it, Keri. This doesn’t count as a broken promise. There’s no possible way for you to foresee that kind of a change in your mother’s plans without her telling you —- which she clearly didn’t. Besides, I do enjoy being a girl, at least in the privacy of my house or yours…” I trailed off for a moment. “Do you think I’m convincing as a girl?”
“Yes, I do.”
“You do, really?”
“Yes, you’re totally convincing.”
“Keri, do you… think I’m pretty? I really want to be pretty. I hope I’m pretty.”

She felt a pang of empathy knowing that every girl feels the same way.

“Oh, Michelle, you’re a very pretty girl. Hell, I would date you —- I mean, if I were interested in girls, that is. It’s kind of too bad I’m not.”

Keri looked down and I looked at her, with my mouth slightly open.

“Even though I love being a girl so much?”

Her smile widened.

“Yes.”

I smiled right back at her, losing myself in her eyes.

“You would really date Michelle?”
“Yes, I really would. I mean that. I wouldn’t make that up.”
“I know you wouldn’t. Thank you, Keri. It means a lot to me to hear you say that. You know, I’ve always wanted to tell you that I think you’re very pretty, too. I would definitely date you. It really is too bad that you prefer boys.”

I tried to tell myself that at least I could go back to being a boy in a couple of days, but I was aware that a part of me wished I could stay a girl a while longer.

“Awwwww! Well, thank you anyway! It’s very nice to hear that! I just hope you don’t think I’m a slut after what I just did.”

She put one hand on her forehead.

“I hope that helped to convince my mother that you’re a girl since girls don’t show their breasts in front of a boy like that.”
“Michelle is not a boy.”

I paused for a moment and Keri cocked her head to one side, wondering what to make of that comment.

“Anyway, I knew why you were doing that, just so you know. I don’t know if that makes you feel any better, but I hope so.”
“It does make me feel better. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Well, did you enjoy the show?”

I looked at my feet.

“Yes, I did.” I looked back at Keri. “Like I said, you’re a very pretty girl.”

We smiled at each other and gave each other a great big hug.

“Michelle, I would love it if you could stay for dinner. Please stay?”
“Well… Michelle is nervous about keeping your mother convinced that she’s a girl and her comfort zone has been violated in all sorts of ways today… but maybe she can do this. It’s only one more person and I’d love to have dinner with you! I’d better call my Mom and let her know.”

I was getting very nervous again.

“Of course! I’ll show you where the phone is.”
“Thanks.”

I gave my Mom a quick call and made the plans. When I was done, I changed back into my own clothes so that I wouldn’t damage Keri’s dress. Then Keri began to add some decals to my fingernails and seal them in with a coat of clear nail polish. We both had fun doing that until it was time for dinner.

Keri’s mother began asking all sorts of questions about Michelle. Since Keri’s mother had walked in on us while Keri was in various states of undress ranging from being in her underwear to being topless, we couldn’t possibly reveal that I wasn’t a girl. So, I was forced to invent a life for Michelle. I told her that I was Kelly’s cousin and that I was staying with him and his family until Monday. Keri’s mother asked what Michelle’s parents do for a living. I told her that they died in a car wreck two years ago and Michelle lives with her 25 year old sister.
After the meal, I thanked her politely for dinner and Keri and I brought our dishes into the kitchen and put them in the dishwasher. I decided I’d better head home. Before I left, Keri’s mother came over to the front door to see me off.

“It was so nice to meet you, Michelle. I’m so glad you came to visit. I’ll have to call Kelly’s mother to let her know what a nice young lady you are! Keri, you really ought to invite Michelle to your party Friday night with your girlfriends. That is if you don’t have any plans, Michelle?”

Keri and I were stunned.

“That’s a very nice idea, Mom, but I think Michelle has plans.”
“Yes, that sounds like fun, but I think my aunt is planning something. It’s a shame I can’t make it.”

Keri and I thought we had dodged a bullet, but no such luck.

“Why don’t you give her a call and see what’s what. Who knows? Maybe you can make it after all!”

I didn’t have to look over at Keri to know what she must be thinking. Keri and I both knew that her mother wasn’t going to let this go. She was nice to a fault and could be somewhat controlling that way. It was time to play the game and play it well. I forced my face to brighten up. Keri played along, too.

“You’re right! That’s a great idea! Come on, Keri, let’s go back upstairs and make that call!”
“Yes, let’s!”
“Wonderful! We certainly hope you can make it, dear.”

We scampered up the stairs and as soon as we were in her room we shut the door.

“God damn it. Sometimes I can’t stand my mother’s nicey-nice bullshit! I should have known what she would do if she saw you. I’m so sorry I got you into this.”
“You?? My mother got me into this. She’s the one punishing me with girls’ clothes. It’s not your fault. Hell, it’s my own fault for running around breaking things at home and knocking my poor sister off her ass.”
“I guess so.”

I put a reassuring hand on her arm.

“I know so.”

She smiled at me half-heartedly.

“Thanks. Well, what are your real plans for Friday night?”
“Oh, I was probably going to let Chrissy give me a makeover again after we have homemade pizza or something.” We both laughed. “I’m afraid I’m just going to have to come to your party and hide my secret in plain sight.”
“I guess so. I don’t see any other way.”
“I don’t either. I thought about calling you on Friday morning and claiming to have eaten some spoiled egg salad or something, but… I think that might actually raise more suspicion than coming to your party. She already thinks I’m a girl and I don’t imagine many girls would pass up a party full of other girls her age. If other girls are anything like me, they would probably finagle their way out of the plans with the aunt and into the party.”
“You’re right about that. Besides, you already tried to back out once just now.”
“Yes, and it’s no use asking my mother to claim that we have plans because she won’t do that. It was her idea to turn me into a girl until Monday and she would just insist that I go because I might learn something. We’d better just tell your mother that I’m coming.”
“Agreed. Okay, come on.”
“Wait. I did tell your mother we had plans Friday night, so I’ll need a reason for those plans to suddenly change…”

I picked up Keri’s phone and called home to let them know what I had in mind in case Keri’s mother actually called before I could even walk home. Afterwards, we went downstairs to find Keri’s mother.

“How did it go, Michelle? What did your aunt say?”
“Well, she tells me that our plans fell through, so… I would love to come!”

She looked at me funny for a moment.

“You don’t have any plans for Friday night then?”

Holy hell, why is she looking at me like that? Time to put my plan into action!

“Well, we did, but Chrissy’s coming down with something and Aunty doesn’t want to just leave her at home sick.”
“Oh, the poor dear. Well, I’m certainly glad you can come, Michelle!”
“Yes, Michelle, I’m so glad you can come.”
“Oh, so am I! It sounds like a lot of fun! Thanks for having me!”

Keri’s mother was expecting Michelle to show up at Keri’s party. There was nothing we could do; we’d played our last card. First, we told her that Michelle had plans and then we told her that the plans fell through because Chrissy got sick. If Michelle didn’t show up then Keri’s mother would start to wonder what was going on. She was the type who wouldn’t let it go until she found out. Keri and I knew that I had no choice but to show up at Keri’s slumber party dressed as a girl. To make matters worse, some of Keri’s friends went to a different school than we did. If they found out that I wasn’t a girl then everyone at both schools would know! It would be all over town!

“Well, Michelle, er… why don’t we get in touch tomorrow and… discuss the details?”

I knew just where she was going with that. We were going to have to go through with this and we needed to figure out how we were going to pull it off.

“Yes, good idea, Keri. We’ll talk tomorrow. Call me in the morning?”
“I will.”
“Well, thank you both so much for inviting me.”
“You’re very welcome, Michelle!”
“Yes, Michelle, we’re really glad you can make it.”

Keri smirked at me, trying not to reveal her facetiousness to her mother. Her mother excused herself to finish in the kitchen and Keri gave me a big hug.

“It’ll be okay, Michelle. I’ll help you through this, whatever it takes.”
“I know you will.”
“By the way, I wasn’t really serious when I said I would tell everyone about you if you didn’t let me take pictures of you.”
“I knew that. But thanks for saying so anyway.”

The last of my doubt that I should trust her was gone. I smiled at her and kissed her on her cheek.

“Thanks for being so supportive of me in every way. It means… everything to me.”
“It’s my pleasure.” She kissed my cheek. “We’ll talk.”
“Yes, we’ll talk.”
“Good night.”
“Good night to you.”

I walked home with my head swimming after exchanging cheek kisses with Keri. If dressing as a girl in public was going to get me wonderful things like that then it was worth it even if I wasn’t comfortable with it. It was just too bad that she probably interpreted the kisses as a girl thing since she wanted to be with a boy.

I headed straight for our family room and told Mom and Tara and Chrissy everything that had happened at Keri’s house. Chrissy declared that she would be happy to play sick for me. Tara and Chrissy were glad for the kisses but concerned for me about the party. Mom wasn’t particularly worried about it because she felt that I was completely convincing as a girl. She reassured me that we had nothing to worry about.
Tara told me that she had some hair dye that she wasn’t going to use. If I wanted to, she could dye my hair strawberry blond just to make sure that nobody would recognize me. If I didn’t like the new color, I could always dye my hair back to its original color. I actually found myself considering it. Chrissy said that I would look really pretty as a strawberry blond.

The phone rang again and Chrissy went over to answer it.

“Michelle, it’s for you.”
“Thanks, Chrissy! I bet I know who that is!”
“I bet you’re right!”

We smiled at each other, giggling together. I took the call in the other room.

“Hi, Keri.”
“Hi, Michelle.”
“Are you really okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. This party isn’t the worst thing that could happen. I could be immolated.” We both laughed. “I’m just kidding.”
“I know. I just wish I could give you a way out of this.”

I cast a quick glance behind my shoulder to ensure my privacy.

“You know, Keri, there is a part of me that doesn’t want a way out.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I feel really good being a girl and… I like being with you.”

Again, Keri wondered what to make of the way I seemed to feel so good as a girl.

“I like being with you, too. I know that will be a big help. I think we’ll be able to pull this off.”
“I hope so. Oh, you know what? Tara was thinking I could dye my hair just to make sure nobody recognizes me. Chrissy thinks I would be pretty as a strawberry blond.”
“That’s a great idea! You would look very pretty as a strawberry blond!”

Sold!

“Really? Well, thanks! I think I’m going to do it!”
“Great! I can’t wait to see the new you! Anyway, I just wanted to check on you and make sure you’re okay. I swear! My mother can be such a pain in the ass sometimes!”
“Funny, I was just thinking the same thing about my old bitch the other day.” We both laughed again. “Well, thanks for checking on me. You’re such a sweetie.” I froze for a moment. “God, I even sound like a girl now.” I giggled at myself.
“Yeah, you do!”
“Good! That’ll be a help!”
“Totally!” She giggled at me. “Okay, I’ll see you Friday night.”
“Yes, I’ll see you then!”

We said our goodnights and hung up. I hurried back to the family room.

“Tara? I’ve decided that I would love to dye my hair strawberry blond. Could you and Chrissy help me do that tonight?”

They were both thrilled.

“Of course we can, Michelle! Come on!”

We went up to Tara’s bathroom and got out her hair dye. What an interesting process that was. It felt weird having my hair dyed, but when we were finished, I couldn’t believe how I looked.

“Chrissy, you were right! I do look really pretty!”

I felt so happy that I hugged them both and we all giggled. Then I helped them clean up Tara’s bathroom. When we finished, we decided to show off my new look to Mom.

“Oh, Michelle, look at you! You look totally different —- and very lovely, I might add!”
“Thank you, Mom! I love it, too!”

It had been quite a long day and I was feeling very tired. After thanking my sisters again for dying my hair, I walked slowly into my room and decided to switch my clothes for a night gown and bathrobe. I kept the bra and panties on underneath. I sat on my bed and looked around my room. I had never felt anything for the masculine decoration, good or bad. For the first time, I realized that there was something wrong with that.

* * * * *

The next morning, after I bathed myself, I selected a tiered, floral knee-length skirt, lavender long-sleeve t-shirt with scoop neck, white semi-sheer tights and the black canvas Mary Janes to wear. I put on my necklace, earrings and ring. I walked over to Chrissy’s room to ask for her help with my make up. She was more than happy to oblige.

“I like your new clothes, Michelle.”
“Thanks, Chrissy. I like them, too.”

Neither of us spoke for a few moments, but I had Keri’s party on my mind.

“I hope I can make it through this party with Michelle’s friends without them finding out about me. I mean, Keri definitely seems to choose good girls for her friends, but… there’s just no guarantee.”
“I know what you mean. It’s not her friends that are likely the problem. It’s all of their parents and all their parents’ interfering ways.”
“Preach it, sister!” We both giggled. “I’m glad I decided to dye my hair. That’s going to be a big help. Chrissy, will you help me do my makeup before the party so that I look just completely like a girl?”

Chrissy smiled at the invitation.

“Of course! I’d love to. In fact, I’ll even teach you how to do it yourself so that you’ll look natural on Saturday morning.”
“Oh, gosh! I hadn’t even thought of that! Thanks, Chrissy. You’re the best.”

We gave each other a hug. That was when I noticed Tara smiling dejectedly at us from the doorway. I realized that she was feeling left out.

“Tara, I would really love it if you would do my hair extra special for me.”

Tara brightened up at once and ran over to hug me.

“Oh, I would love to be part of this!”
“I want you both to be part of it, too. I’m really going to need your support through this. I mean, good god! Twenty-four hours ago, Michelle was just a playful fantasy that nobody was ever supposed to know about. Now she has her own wardrobe, a social life and a fictional 25 year old sister.”

We all shared a nervous giggle. My sisters both hugged me for a brief moment but the phone rang again. Once again, it was for me.

“I got it, Mom!”

I hustled over to the phone — without running -- and let Tara and Chrissy listen in.

“Hi, Keri.”
“Hi, Michelle. So here’s how this works. My parties with my friends get started around four so that we can have some fun time before we go out to dinner. I know that’s stretching things out for you, but we’d better not change anything. Mom might suspect.”
“Yeah, let’s not change anything.”
“Cool! Besides, we actually have a reservation for our own room tonight at the restaurant, so that will help! This way you don’t have to worry about the whole restaurant on top of everything else.”
“That’s great! Did you swing that or was it your mother’s idea?”
“A little of both, actually.”
“Well done, Keri — and thank you! I appreciate that!”
“That’s okay; I knew it would help you.”
“Yeah, it will!”
“Right, and then when we get home, Mom will leave us to ourselves. I was thinking that if we watch a movie after dinner —- or two -- then things will be pretty easy for us and that leaves only the first three hours or so for you to keep my Mom convinced that you’re a girl.”
“Great! Thanks for the extra help!”
“You’re very welcome!”
“Well, I’ll see you at about four tomorrow afternoon then.”
“Yes. Four o’clock.”

An hour later, my mom left to go to the grocery store. Tara and Chrissy had plans with their friends and that left me home by myself for an hour, which I didn’t mind. It would be a nice break from all of the chaos that had been going on lately and time for me to enjoy being a girl in peace. After they were all gone I decided to try doing my hair.

I walked over to my extra closet, looked at myself in the mirror for a few minutes and thought about how I wanted to do my hair. I decided to pull it back and clip it for now. I walked into Chrissy’s room and borrowed a hair clip. Back in my own room, I walked over to the closet mirror. I brushed my hair, pulled it back, and clipped it into place. I thought I’d done a pretty nice job. I looked totally like a girl —- especially with my new hair color. While I was admiring myself in the mirror, I heard the doorbell. I hurried into Tara’s room to see who was at the door. Tara’s room faced the front of the house and the door stoop was barely visible with a craning of the head.

As I looked down to see who it was, I saw Tara’s friend Brad standing there! I wondered if I should pretend that I wasn’t home. Then I remembered that she’d promised him he could borrow her camera to work on a project for his dad. She must have forgotten all about it in the midst of supporting Michelle through her ordeal!

Tara’s friend had an internship at his dad’s residential real estate office in the afternoons and taking pictures was part of the work. His father needed the project done in time for a meeting on Friday and so Brad needed to take the pictures today. I had heard Tara telling him he could stop by on his way to take the pictures and get her camera from her. I couldn’t pretend I wasn’t home. Well, technically I could, but I didn’t want him to get in trouble at his dad’s office — and I didn’t want Tara to get in trouble with Brad. There was no getting around introducing Michelle to Brad unless I wanted to screw over Tara and her friend. After everything Tara had done for me, I could not bear to let her get in trouble with her friend. I looked back in the mirror and felt satisfied that I looked nothing like Kelly. I walked downstairs, took a deep breath, and answered the door.

“Hi. Can I help you?”
“Uh, yeah, my name’s Brad. I’m a friend of Tara’s. I’m here to borrow her camera to do some work for my dad. Is she home?”
“Oh, hi. She told me you were coming. My name’s Michelle. I’m Tara’s cousin. I’m staying here for a few days.”
“Oh, that’s nice.”

Judging from that awful smile on his face, he thought it was more than nice. I had seen him look at girls before. I remembered when he was talking to some friends about a girl he really liked at school and he told them that he would love to date that girl. He had a ridiculous smile on his face. When I introduced myself, he got that same ridiculous look on his face. He thought I was a girl and he was thinking about dating me! I wished that Brad would do a better job of behaving himself. I realized that I had just learned what a girl feels like when a boy she isn’t interested in looks at her like that and she just wants him to leave her alone. Girls must put up with a lot from boys!

“I'm the only one here. Come on in and I’ll get her camera for you.”
“Thanks.”

We continued to chat while we walked up to Tara’s room.

“So, uh, how come not you’re not out with your cousins?”
“Well, Chrissy and Kelly are grocery shopping with my Aunt and Tara had a doctor appointment for Monday that got rescheduled for today. So, Tara asked me if I would answer the door for you because she didn’t want you to get in trouble at work and I said sure, no problem.”
“Well, thanks for doing that. Tell Tara thanks, too. I would have been in trouble for sure, believe me. The pictures I have to take today are for one of my dad’s best clients. If he doesn’t have the pictures for his meeting tomorrow he’s going to look like a complete asshole.”

I couldn’t help giggling at him.

“Wow. In that case, I’m glad he’s going to get them.”
“Me, too. Well, I have to go and get these done, but it was very nice to meet you.”

He extended his hand politely. Good for Brad.

“Nice to meet you, too.”

I shook his hand very softly, knowing how boys shake hands and trying to hide that I was one.

“Maybe I’ll see you around.”
“Sure. A girl can never have too many friends.”

He looked somewhat dejected at the mention of the word ‘friends’, but I knew that the sooner I put any romantic ideas out of his head, the better.

“Yeah. That sounds great.”

He walked away and I closed the door, glad to be alone again. I leaned against the door for a moment and sighed with relief. I went upstairs to return Chrissy’s hair clip and braid my hair again. Before long, mom was home and I told her about Brad’s visit. She thought it was funny that he hadn’t had a clue and impressive that I hadn’t given him one.

“Well, that must make you feel more confident for the party tomorrow night.”
“Somewhat. Brad was a boy, but the party is going to be full of girls.”
“I suppose that’s true, but I think you’re doing to do great!”
“Thanks, Mom!”

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. I mentioned Brad’s visit to Tara and informed her that I had told Brad she had a rescheduled doctor appointment. She had completely forgotten, as I suspected. She was grateful to me for not getting her in trouble with Brad.

* * * * *

The next morning, I dressed myself in a black bra and pair of panties, my navy and dark green plaid skirt, dark green sweater, navy tights and navy canvas Mary Janes. After I put my jewelry on, I went to Chrissy’s room to ask her to help me with my hair and make up again, but she wasn’t there. She was probably already downstairs. On her vanity I saw the hair clip that I had borrowed the day before. Perhaps it was time to start doing my own hair. I pulled back the front half of my hair, brushed it back a bit with Chrissy’s brush, and enclosed it in the hair clip high up behind my head. I adjusted it here and there and decided it looked pretty good. I smiled at my new accomplishment.
I recognized all of the makeup that Chrissy used on me and I resolved to give that a try as well. I carefully applied the same color lipstick I’d been wearing and did a decent job of it. Then I picked up the eyeliner and mascara and did what I had watched Chrissy do. Once I was done, I looked at myself in the mirror and scrutinized my work. It didn’t look quite as good as when Chrissy did it, but it looked believable. I smiled at myself again and decided to go downstairs and get some breakfast. Mom and Tara and Chrissy were already down there, almost ready to eat.

“Good morning, everyone.”
“Well, Michelle, don’t you look cute.”
“Yeah, Michelle, did you do your own hair and makeup today?”

I blushed.

“Yes, I did. Everyone is already downstairs, so I decided to give it a try.”

We sat down and began to eat.

“Well, you did a pretty nice job. I’m proud of you.”
“Yeah, Michelle, you do look nice!”
“Thanks, you two!”

Mom actually looked a bit nostalgic.

“My little girl is growing up.”

I rolled my eyes.

“Yes, Mom, I’m growing up.”
“You look so adorable. I should keep you in tights forever!”

Tara and Chrissy and I looked at each other, wondering what the hell Mom was going on about. Well, I knew one way to change the subject.

“So, um, do you ladies have any advice for a girl going to her first girly party?”
“Oh, that’s right! It’s tonight, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, Mom. It’s tonight. I’m really nervous about it. I’m going to be around a bunch of girls my age and, um… I know I look pretty good, but… I want to make sure that they don’t find out about me, so… I don’t know, do I talk like a girl? Do I walk like a girl?”
“Honestly, it didn’t occur to me to teach you those things since you’ll only be a girl for a couple more days. Of course, that was before we knew about Keri’s party full of girls. I guess we’d better teach you a few things, just to be safe.”

While we finished breakfast, Mom and Tara and Chrissy told me about a whole bunch of things that girls do differently from boys. They taught me what to do with my hands, how to eat, how to hold my head, and everything else they could think of. After we cleared the dishes from the table, they began coaching me on things like walking, standing, sitting, and a variety of other things. We took a break for lunch and afterwards they had me recite everything I had learned, brushing me up where necessary. I learned how to do everything I needed to be convincing as a girl.

It was 1 o’clock and Chrissy and Tara had plans with their friends again. After they left, Mom came over to talk to me.

“Michelle, dearest?”
“Yes, Mom?”
“I have a couple of surprises for you that will help you stay undetected tonight.”
“Really? What?”
“Let’s get in the car and I’ll show you! I know that you don’t like leaving the house dressed as a girl, but you’ll do very well.”

I got instantly nervous.

“We’re leaving the house again? Well, if it will keep my secret safe tonight, then let’s do it.”
“That’s the spirit!”

Fifteen minutes later, we parked the car in front of a hair salon. I looked at my mother with apprehension.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. We’re not here to shorten your pretty hair. You’re just going in to get rid of split ends and have it styled a bit. It will only be perhaps an inch shorter than it is now. Besides, you should have your hair done nicely for a night with the girls, just to make sure you look your best! You’ll love it; trust me on this!”
“Okay, Mom. Let’s go.”
“Hold on. I want to let you in on the other surprise first.”
“What is it?”
“Before I tell you what it is, please remember that we’re trying to make you a complete girl for this party so that your secret will be safe.”
“I know, Mom.”
“Okay, here it is. As you’ve probably noticed, girls your age have their ears pierced. If you want to be truly convincing as a girl then you should probably get your ears pierced, too. After the party is over you can take the earrings out and the holes will close up. Do you feel comfortable with that?”

I felt a pungent mix of gaiety and tension similar to what I had felt at the mall. I really wanted to have my ears pierced, but at the same time I felt… something distinctly and potently ominous. I couldn’t figure out what it was. I just knew that something was trying to make its way to the surface of my consciousness like a dolphin caught in a fish net. In any case, I knew that I would prefer anything to being found out.

“Well, I think I’d better do it. It really would help to protect my secret.”
“Okay then. Let’s go.”
“Let’s go.”

When I got back in the car, I had gold studs in my ears and my hair looked wonderful. The split ends were gone. My hair had a single, thin braid along the part and was wrapped in a bun high up behind my head. It looked fresh and girly and pretty.

As we got ourselves buckled up again in the car, Mom decided to check on me.

“How do you like your new look? Is everything okay?”
“I think I look beautiful. It’s just… well, I can’t really put my finger on it. Maybe I’m just feeling like it’s going too far. I started out pretending to be Michelle just so I wouldn’t be found out, you know? Now it’s different. It’s like she’s coming alive and I can’t contain her anymore. I don’t know. I guess I feel confused.”
“I don’t blame you. A lot of things happened that we didn’t expect to and you’ve been pushed to be a different person in all kinds of ways because of it. When I came up with your punishment I figured you’d just be hanging around the house for the next few days and that would be it.”
“So did I. That’s what I usually do this time of year.”

We both chuckled.

“Well, we’d better get home and get you packed for the night.” She put a reassuring hand on my arm. “Everything will be okay, honey. Really.”
“I know.”

At 3 o’clock, I went upstairs to pack my overnight bag and I realized that my suitcases looked rather masculine. Then I caught a glance at my sleeping bag and knew it wouldn’t do, either. I needed to borrow a sleeping bag and overnight bag from my sisters. Tara had a nice floral print overnight bag and a purple sleeping bag that she didn’t have much use for and she gave them to me to keep. I gave her a big hug and thanked her. Then I carefully packed a nightgown, bathrobe, slippers, makeup, toiletries and outfit for the next day. I chose a white satin bra and panties, denim skirt, white peasant shirt with floral print, white tights and black cotton Mary Janes. Finally, I went over to Chrissy’s room, grabbing Tara along the way, so that Chrissy could do my makeup especially pretty while Tara helped me choose the perfect earrings. When they were done, I looked adorable. I looked completely and totally female. I was ready for the party… but I sat there for a moment and didn’t move.

“Well, I guess you’d better get going, Michelle.”
“I know, Chrissy.” I gave out a long sigh. “I just hope everything goes okay.”
“I think it will.”
“So do I, Michelle. You’re so convincing as a girl that it’s hard to believe you were ever a boy.”

That made me smile. I gave Tara a big hug.

“Thanks, Tara! What a nice thing to say!”
“You’re welcome.”
“Well, I guess I’ve got to go. I have to convince them that I’m a girl who’s excited to be coming to this party, so I can’t be too late.”

Chrissy came over for a hug, too.

“Good luck, Michelle! If it gets intense, just tell them you need to pee and then call us to talk about it.”
“Yeah, that’s a good idea, Chrissy. We’ll monitor the phone for you just in case.”
“Thanks, you two! You’re the best!”

We all gave each other one more big hug and then it was time for me to go. I walked back to my room, picked up my bags, and walked downstairs to the front door, escorted by my sisters. My mother came over to see me off. I put my hand on the doorknob to open the front door and hesitated again.

“Well, here goes everything. Wish me luck!”
“Good luck!”
“The best of luck!”
“You’ll do wonderfully, dear! There’s nothing to worry about.”

I could still feel something distinctly ominous trying to break through to my consciousness like a bird hatching from an egg.

“Thanks, everyone. See you tomorrow!”
“Bye!”

I took a deep breath, opened the door and walked outside. It was a pretty nice day and I enjoyed the walk to Keri’s house. When I came near her house, I became very nervous. I walked slowly up the few stairs to her front door and paused before I rang the doorbell. I had a feeling that everything was about to change and that change would take place here and tonight. I took a few more deep breaths. At last, I rang the bell. Keri opened the door exactly three seconds later and gasped when she saw Michelle’s new hair.

“Michelle! Look at your pretty hair!”

I couldn’t help but smile at her. I suspect I was blushing too.

“You really like it?”
“I love it!”
“Thank you, Keri!”

I gave her a big hug. I was really beginning to feel pretty for the first time and I loved that feeling. I was beginning to enjoy the idea of being at this party, yet, something stirred deep down inside me.

“Let’s put your stuff up in my room. Everyone’s up there chatting and having a great time.”
“Oh, good!”

She could tell I was nervous. She gave me another hug and I smiled at her.

“Let’s just do this.”
“Okay, Michelle. Let’s go.”

When we got to Keri’s room, her door was open and there were four girls sitting on her bed and her floor, listening to some music and having a great time. I was glad for the music. It seemed to help me to relax a bit.

“Hi, everyone. I’d like you to meet Michelle.”
“Hi, Michelle. You’re Kelly’s cousin?”
“Hi! Yes, that’s right. I’m Kelly’s cousin.”
“Wow. You look nothing like him.”
“Thank God for that.”

The girls all giggled at my remark. It had slipped out before I could think about it. Fortunately, the girls appeared to be unaware of what I was really saying.

“So, Michelle, let me introduce everyone else. Shelby is the one sitting on the floor. Sarah, Chloe and Amber are on the bed, in that order.”
“Hi, girls!”
“Shelby and Chloe go to school with Kelly and I and Sarah and Amber go to Wilton Academy.”
“Oh, neat!”

Sarah and Amber looked at each other with raised eyebrows.

“Not so much. We’d rather be going to Emery High with you guys. Wilton is so full of snobs it makes me sick.”

After Sarah’s introduction, Amber began to ape one of their schoolmates in a squeaky, ditzy voice.

“I’m Portia. I’m a rich bitch with an IQ smaller than my shoe size. My father paid for the new gym and my purse costs more than my education! That’s why I’m better than you! Get out of my way, dork!”
“What a bitch!” I said in pure disgust, eliciting more giggles. “I can’t stand stuck up people like that! Someone should fill up that purse of hers with spaghetti sauce -- and make sure it has garlic and onions.”

The whole room broke into laughter, including me.

“That would be so funny!”
“Yeah, I’d love to see that.”
“Eh, I bet ‘Daddy’ would by her another one in time for school the next morning.”
“You’re probably right, Michelle.”
“So Keri, you and Michelle should tell us how you met!”

Before she answered, she smiled at me in that subtle way of hers.

“Well, it’s really pretty simple. I bumped into Michelle while she was out shopping at the mall with Chrissy and Tara and their mother and I thought she might like to hang out with us.”
“Keri was right, too. Tara and Chrissy are awesome, but I didn’t know any girls my age over here, so it was great to meet Keri!”
“So are you staying at Kelly’s house then?”
“Yes, for a few days.”
“Aw, and then you have to leave us?”
“Well, yes and no. I have to go home again, but I only live a few miles away.”
“Oh, cool! So how come you’re staying with your cousins?”
“Well, I live with my 25 year old sister and she’s out of town on business, so the cousins offered to have me stay with them. I figured it would be fun to see them. That’s why I’m here instead.”

I gave them all an ironic smile and we all laughed.

“What about your parents? Where are they?”
“They died in a car wreck two years ago.”
“Oh, that’s horrible! I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay. It’s hard sometimes, but I’m pretty much used to it now.”

Keri changed the subject and started us talking about celebrity couples. We had a great time talking about ‘Brangelina’, ‘Bennifer’ and all of the rest. I was really fitting in with the girls. I felt relaxed and had even forgotten that I wasn’t one until I needed to pee. I excused myself and walked into the bathroom. I was feeling confused again. I had felt real and complete in there with the girls and now I felt empty. After I was finished, I looked in the mirror for a few minutes. I looked and felt pretty and I loved it. I began to think about having to put my hair back the way it was and the thought depressed me.

I heard a soft knock on the door and figured that one of the other girls needed to take a turn, so I turned and walked to the door. When I opened it, Keri was standing there with a concerned expression on her face and quietly asked me, “Are you okay? What’s the matter?”
I replied, equally softly, “Keri, I don’t know what’s happening to me, but I’m really, really confused. I fit in perfectly in there and I feel… real and… complete. I was relaxed in there and I even totally forgot that I’m… you know… until I had to…” I finished the sentence by pointing behind me into the bathroom. “Why do I fit in so perfectly with the girls?”

Keri had a good idea of what was happening to me, but she decided that it wasn’t the time to go into it. She decided we would talk about it privately after the party was over. Besides, she was only guessing. She wasn’t positive.

“I’m not sure, sweetie. Is it scaring you that you fit in so well?”
“Well, yes it is, but… at the same time… I love it. Anyway, I’m okay. I’m not worried about… Kelly… anymore. Now I’m only worried about what Kelly isn’t telling me. Well, I can figure it out later. Let’s go back. Oh, did you need to go?”
“No, I just came to check on you. Come on. Dinner is pretty soon and then we can watch the movie and give you a rest.”

I smiled at her.

“Thanks for checking on me.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Let’s go back before they think we’re having our own secret party over here.”

We began cracking up. She took my hand and we returned to the group. When we got back to Keri’s room, she put on some upbeat music and cranked up her stereo. We danced around and sang along to the music together. I knew and loved the songs that Keri selected. At one point, she played Cyndi Lauper’s Hey Now (Girls Just Want to Have Fun) and for once, I didn’t have to hide my enjoyment! Something felt right singing that song as a girl and as soon as I realized that, the feeling of dread returned. I still didn’t know where that was coming from, but I chose to ignore it and have fun. I had such a blast singing and dancing around with the girls!

An hour and a half later, Keri’s mom reminded us that we needed to leave for dinner in thirty minutes. Keri acknowledged her to make sure she wouldn’t come up the stairs unnecessarily and we began touching up our makeup for our dinner out.

While I was in the bathroom refreshing my lipstick, Chloe walked in to do the same. As we stood there, side by side, we complemented each other’s lipstick. I was having fun doing my makeup with another girl —- until Chloe asked an unsettling question.

“Michelle, may I ask you something?”
“Sure, Chloe.”
“I have the funniest feeling that I know you.”

I stopped and turned to her.

“Really?”
“Yes. There’s someone in particular that you remind me of.”

She glanced out the door to make sure that we still had enough privacy to resume our conservation.

“Six degrees, I guess.” I tried to giggle. “So, who do I remind you of? Reese Witherspoon?”
“Maybe in your dreams.” We both laughed. “Actually you remind me of a boy at school.”
“Really? Who?”
“Kelly. While you were in the bathroom, I called his house. Chrissy picked up. She could hear us chatting and she realized I was here at Keri’s party. I asked for Kelly and she told me he wasn’t there. She sounded faintly nervous about something. I really couldn’t tell you what. I asked her if Kelly was okay and she said yes, he was at a friend’s house for the night and then I asked Chrissy if she was feeling better and she said she still wasn’t feeling good tonight.”

I made a mental note to thank Chrissy later for covering for me. Chloe was looking right at me while she spoke as if she had a pretty good idea why Chrissy was nervous. I kept my eye contact with her.

“So you think she’s really worried about Kelly?”
“Yes, I think that was what was bugging her. I had a feeling she truly wasn’t feeling well, but not because she’s sick. More like sick with worry. I think something’s up with Kelly.”

Oh, crap. I don’t like where this is going.

“Well, I overheard that Kelly’s going through something right now that’s really private and really big and he’s scared of people knowing.”
“Any idea what? I would never share this with anyone else, of course.”

I nodded at her.

“Of course, I know you wouldn’t. From what I understand, Kelly doesn’t really know yet himself. It’s something about his identity and he’s trying to figure it out. You know how he’s at a friend’s house for the night?”
“Yes.”
“Right, well, he got roped into going to that friend’s house tonight because he had dinner there and afterwards the friend’s mother basically insisted that he come to his friend’s party tonight and make some new friends. Anyway, he had a feeling that being at this friend’s house could answer all of his questions and he’s not sure he wants to know the answers. That’s all I know.”

Chloe looked at me silently for a moment, her eye contact still unbroken.

“Wow. Poor guy.” She opened her mouth and hesitated for a second. “Well, I’m… sure he’s with good friends who… would want to do whatever they can to help him.” She hesitated again, still looking me in the eyes. “Friends he can trust.”

I smiled faintly.

“Yeah, I guess so. Well, knowing him, when he figures out what’s going on, he will be ready to tell his friends.”
“Cool.”
“Yeah. I have the feeling that he probably knows what’s happening, but he’s still… in denial about it, I guess.”
“Okay, so he’s getting there then. That’s good. Well, his friends will be ready when he is. They’ll understand if he needs more time.”

Chloe surreptitiously put a gentle hand on my shoulder on her way out of the bathroom.

“Chloe?”
“Yeah?”

I cast a quick glance toward the bedroom to make sure I wouldn’t be heard. Then I looked Chloe in the eyes again.

“Thank you.”

She smiled and mouthed the words "you’re welcome" and returned to the bedroom. I looked at myself in the mirror for a few seconds thinking about what was going on inside of me. Then I decided I’d better get back, so I did one last touch up on my lipstick and returned to the bedroom.

“There you are, Michelle. Are you all set?”

She seemed to be asking if I was ready for dinner, but I knew that she was really asking if I was okay.

“Yeah, Keri. I’m good.”

I smiled at her and she smiled back.

“Okay, we’d better get going!”

We went to an Indian food restaurant and had our own little room in back, complete with doors that the staff kept closed for privacy. I was very nervous walking through the restaurant, but I tried to keep my attention on Keri. We were in our private room soon enough, and once we sat down I felt much more relaxed. The meal went well. The food was good, the conversation was fun, and we all had a great time. Keri asked me to come to the bathroom with her at one point during the meal and used the opportunity to check up on me. I was feeling a lot better about being at the restaurant than I thought. We gave each other another smile and returned to the table.

Keri had picked the musical movie Moulin Rouge for us to watch. She knew that we both liked it and she figured it would help me feel at home. Keri and I sang along to the lyrics of the movie since we knew them. I was surprised to find myself feeling plenty comfortable with doing that. I would have been embarrassed to do that as Kelly. When the movie reached its sad ending, I found myself openly sobbing with the rest of the girls instead of holding my emotions in. I felt wonderfully liberated in a way I never knew I could. Keri noticed the changes in me and was amazed, but not surprised.

After the movie ended, she suggested we watch TV.

“What do you girls want to watch? Here, I’ll pull up the stuff I have recorded.”
“What’s Ma Vie En Rose, Keri?”
“That’s the one where the little boy is transgendered and gets into all sorts of trouble because of it. His parents suck at first, but his grandmother is really nice to him.”
“Oh yeah! I remember that movie!” I had the urge to find out how the other girls would react to the concept of transgenderism. “Can we watch that, Keri? Sound good, girls?”
“Um, yeah, I think that sounds great!”

I looked over at Chloe and gave her a subtle smile. Keri picked up on that. She knew that she and I had both seen that movie as well, and decided to make sure all was right.

“Tell you what, girls. Why don’t we change into our nightclothes and Michelle and I will go downstairs and bring up some good eats, yeah?”
“Oooo! Me like!”
“Yeah, I’m with Chloe! This is a slumber party. Let’s eat snacks!”
“Okay! Snacks it is! Come on, Michelle.”

Keri and I went downstairs to the kitchen and when we got there, Keri wanted to know what she’d seen up there. She broached the subject as we poured pretzels and chips into bowls.

“Michelle, does Chloe know why you asked for that movie?”
“Yes, she does. She called my house while we were in the bathroom, because I reminded her of Kelly and she decided to find out if I am Kelly. Chrissy told her I was out at a friend’s house for the night. Chloe said that Chrissy could tell she was here and Chrissy sounded nervous about something, but not sick, other than maybe with worry. Chloe knows.”
“Uh oh.”
“Actually, it’s a good thing. She told me that she’s sure Kelly is with good friends who would understand, friends he can trust.”
“Wow! That is really, really cool!”
“Yeah, it is cool. Now, if I just knew what Kelly isn’t telling me… but I still don’t.”
“He’ll tell you when he’s ready. Come on, let’s bring these snacks upstairs.”

Keri carried the bowls of chips and pretzels and I brought up the diet sodas and a large plate of brownies. We were set for the night. On the way up the stairs, I marveled at how I had arrived at Keri’s almost petrified of making it through the night and a few hours later, I was no longer afraid to be there.

* * * * *

We ended up watching three movies, all of them depicting a boy dressing as a girl in at least some role. After the third movie concluded, Keri reached for the remote and changed the channel. As soon as she did, the TV began blaring a commercial for some damned vacuum cleaner.

“Ow, my ears! Jesus Christ!”

A round of giggles began as Keri turned down the volume. She switched channels again and landed on a commercial ad for a movie about a transgendered person who had been born male but who felt that she was truly a woman on the inside. The movie took place during the transgendered person’s adulthood, but the trailer began with a flashback scene from the childhood of the transgendered person. In the flashback, the main character was dressed as a girl. She stood before a mirror, smiled at her reflection, and executed a 360 degree twirl. Michelle’s breath caught in her throat. Oh, my God, that’s just like me! The trailer made it clear that the transgendered character wanted to change her identity, including her name and even her body. There were clips of her declaring that she wanted to be called Cynthia. Just like I wanted to be called Michelle as soon as Chrissy suggested it!

Words began to echo in my head. You know, Keri, part of me doesn’t want a way out. What was up with that? I should want a way out… shouldn’t I? Why do I fit in so well with the girls? It didn’t make sense. I fit in perfectly in there and I feel… real and… complete. What was making me feel real and complete while I was with the other girls? Is it scaring you that you fit in so well? Why would it scare me? I’m not afraid of being found out anymore. You’re so convincing as a girl that it’s hard to believe you were ever a boy. Michelle is not a boy. Suddenly, I froze with my mouth hanging slightly open.

I watched the teaser absolutely rapt, my eyes inextricable from the screen. I realized that my life story was disquietingly similar to that of the transgendered character in the trailer. I began to understand what had been happening inside of me. Suddenly, the disturbing feelings that had plagued me were neatly accounted for. I knew all along that I loved being a girl and deep down inside, I had known where it would take me. Everything swam into focus. Everything fit.

The movie trailer concluded and the TV displayed an ad for a medication that nobody needed, along with an extensive list of possible side effects. Michelle dropped her gaze, for a moment, to the floor just below the TV. Very slowly, she looked over at Keri, who made eye contact and instantly understood that Michelle needed her. Michelle slowly turned her eyes toward Chloe, who picked up on Michelle’s cue as smoothly as Keri had. Shelby, Amber and Sarah caught on that something out of the ordinary was happening. They looked at each other, wondering what it was. Michelle, still in semi-slow motion, swallowed, cleared her throat, and announced that she would be right back. She hoped to hell that she appeared to be taking a bathroom break. She made her way toward the bathroom, but once she was out of sight, she went right past the bathroom and into the guest bedroom behind it.

She sat on the bed and closed her eyes tightly for a moment, trying to wrap her head around everything. Oh, my God. I’m a girl. I really am a girl. She opened her eyes, looked around the room and noticed the feminine décor. She was aware that she felt very comfortable in that room, a comfort akin to the feeling of wearing one’s favorite sweats. Kelly’s room, on the other hand, had always felt contrived, as one would feel wearing a mechanic’s jumpsuit that belonged to someone else. Yet, she couldn’t feel totally comfortable with the femininity of the room and her frustration thickened the mixture of her emotions.

As she sat in silence, taking in the bedroom décor and trying to explore her feelings, Keri and Chloe tiptoed in the door, closing it quietly behind them.

“Are you okay, Michelle?”

They sat down on either side of Michelle.

“Yes and no.” She paused and looked down at the ring on her hand as she gently toyed with it. The other two girls remained expectantly silent. Michelle continued slowly. “Something has been bothering me lately, something very big, but I didn’t know what until now. When we were watching that ad, for the movie about the transgendered woman… I identified completely with her. I used to sneak into Chrissy’s room, dress in her clothes and twirl in the mirror just like we saw in that trailer. I knew that I wanted to completely change my name, too. I also realized that I… ”

Michelle looked up at Keri.

“I feel that I… might… want to change my body, too.”

Michelle paused as she turned to face Chloe.

“The truth, Chloe, is that I don’t just look like Kelly. I am Kelly —- or at least I was. My sisters helped me dye my hair and I have been living exclusively as a girl named Michelle for the last three days as a kind of punishment for running around at home and knocking over a few things —- like my sister, for instance.” Michelle rambled on, lost in thought. “Tara had a run in her tights after I knocked her down and that was what gave my mother the idea of dressing me up to make me slow down. Anyway…” She paused again. “I had been wearing girls’ clothes long before my mother ever thought up that punishment. The whole reason I grew my hair this long was to look more like a girl. I guess what I’m trying to say is that…” Michelle took a breath, “I am a girl. I’m transgendered, like that woman in the ad. It seems so unreal but at the same time, everything makes sense now.” I looked at my hands. “Keri, remember how I’ve been saying that I was worried about what Kelly wasn’t telling me.?” She nodded. “I guess he just did... or… I guess I should say…” I looked up at Keri. “She just did.”

Michelle fell silent. Keri put her arm around Michelle.

“I had a feeling that was what was going on.”
“So did I.”
“Really, Chloe?”
“Yeah. I did.”
“How did you know?”
“Well, my first hint was that I secretly disagreed when Shelby said that you didn’t look like Kelly. I thought you looked exactly like him, although the strawberry blond hair would throw a girl off if she weren’t paying attention. Anyway, I got to wondering if it really was you and so I called your house to see where you were. Chrissy did a great job of covering for you, bless her heart, but I could tell.”

Michelle looked at Keri.

“How did you figure it out, Keri?”
“I got my first inkling while you were here the day I saw you at the mall. I know that you were nervous about those, um--”

Keri paused and looked inquisitively at Michelle, who understood what she was asking.

“It’s okay, Keri. You can tell her about the photos.”
“What’s this about photos, now?” Chloe’s interest was piqued.
“When I saw Michelle at the mall she was, well, dressed as a girl. I was very surprised because I didn’t know any of this at the time. I thought she looked really cute and I wished I had a camera. When I got home, I called Michelle and coaxed her to come to my place so I could get some pictures of her. I knew you were nervous about the pictures, Michelle, but I could tell that you felt good being a girl, at least in private.”

Chloe found that endearing.

“May I see the photos later, Michelle?”
“Yeah, of course, now that you know.”
“Cool! I’m sorry, Keri. You were saying…”
“Oh, right. When you first started chatting with the girls, you looked more natural and animated than I had ever seen you. Then, all of a sudden, you got this pensive expression on your face and excused yourself to use the bathroom. That was why I came to check on you. When you opened the door after I knocked, I could see that something was wrong. Then you confided in me that you felt so relaxed while you were chatting with the girls and that you had even forgotten that you weren’t a girl until you had to pee. When you said that I knew I was looking at a girl, not a boy.”
“Wow. This is amazing.”
“Yeah, it sure is.”

Keri was looking down at the floor as though she had just realized something. Her face had a pained look on it.

“Are you okay, Keri?”

Keri knew she would be too choked up to speak in a moment, so she went right ahead with her question.

“Are you attracted to guys, Michelle?”
“No, I’m still attracted to girls. I guess that means I’m a lesbian. That’s why ‘straight’ is not the word, Chloe.”

Keri squeezed my hand. Her smile seemed to have supplanted the pained expression, but I noticed tears in Keri’s eyes.

“Keri, are you okay? Why are you crying?”
“Because I have a secret, too.”
“Well, it’s certainly safe to tell me. Whenever you’re ready.”

I squeezed her hand and we smiled at each other, wiping at our tears.

“Michelle, I totally meant it when I said I would date you, but…”
“I know, Michelle, it’s okay. Now that I know I’m a girl —- or at least I think I am —- it wouldn’t work out.”

I looked down at the floor, feeling very dejected. I felt tears leaking out of my own eyes. I looked slowly back up at her, hoping she wouldn’t realize how depressed I was that she wanted a guy.

“I couldn’t be more ready.” She took a deep breath. “Michelle, I’m a lesbian. I’m also in love. I’m in love with you.”

Another tear slid down her cheek and I stared at her as an enormous, love-struck smile commandeered my face.

“Really? You are?”

I reached over and dried her tear with my finger.

“Yes. I am.”
“Is that why you’re crying?”
“Yes.” She sniffled.
“Oh, my gosh! I don’t believe this is happening!”

I was filled with a joy that I had never known before.

“Keri, I’m… I’m really in love with you, too!”

She grabbed me and threw her arms around me and we hugged very snugly, with our heads touching and my hand caressing her hair.
“I love you so much,” I whispered into her ear. “I love you, too,” her whisper replied.
“You know, I think I’ll just…” Chloe rose, pointing at the door, indicating that she was leaving the room.
“Well, I feel like sharing my secret with the other girls now.”
“I want to share mine, too.”
We smiled at each other.
“Okay, let’s all go back.”

A few minutes later, the other girls were fully up to date on everything.
“We’re so happy for you, Michelle. It must feel great to finally understand yourself.”
“Yeah, it does.”
“We’re really happy for your new relationship, too!”
“This is great, you two! You make a beautiful couple!”

Keri and I hugged each other and pulled back, with our faces so close we were almost touching. My hand moved to her cheek.

“It’s wonderful.”

An otherworldly force overpowered us and pulled us irresistibly toward each other. We kissed, deeply and passionately while the other girls applauded.

Two hours later, we were all getting ready for bed. I went to brush my teeth and Chloe came in to use the other sink.

“Michelle, I am so thrilled for you and Keri. I always knew you had a crush on her.”
“I always have had a crush on Keri. Listen, Chloe, thanks so much for your support and understanding. If not for our conversation earlier, I would not have felt so comfortable revealing everything.”
“I’m so glad I could help!”
“Well, I should really get back–”
“Go get her!”
“Goodnight, Chloe!”
“Goodnight, Michelle!”

As I looked around for my sleeping bag, I saw that Keri had spread it out right next to hers. She was lounging on one side with her head propped up on one hand. The other hand patted my sleeping bag in a very alluring manner. I was more than happy to sleep close to Michelle! I came over to her side and climbed in my sleeping bag. Chloe turned the lights out and Keri and I immediately cuddled up. We waited for everyone to fall asleep and when we felt convinced enough that the coast was clear, we silently zipped our sleeping bags open far enough to begin fondling each other as we kissed.

* * * * *

The next morning, we got ourselves dressed and packed up our bags. Once we were done, we headed downstairs for breakfast. When we got to the kitchen we saw Keri’s mother sitting at the table with three other people.

“Mom! Tara! Chrissy! What are you doing here?”
“I called your mother last night after I heard you girls talking in the guest bedroom. Now, Michelle, I have not yet told your mother about your news —- I feel that’s your place —- but you mother did give me a call and tell me that she has had some suspicions about you. She also asked for my help. Anyway, I’ll step back now and let you two explain things to each other."
“Michelle, darling, I have something to tell you about your… punishment.”

She finished by making quoting gestures in the air with her fingers.

“O-okay. What’s going on exactly, Mom?”
“First, will you tell me your news? I can guarantee you I’ll have no problem with it.”
“Okay. This may or may not come as a surprise, but… I am transgendered.”
“I knew it!”

Chrissy couldn’t contain herself. She gave me big hug and Tara wasn’t close behind.

“Michelle, I am so glad you have figured this out and I could not love you more. I am very happy to have a third daughter and from this point on, you can be Michelle permanently.”

I don’t know who screamed the loudest, me, Keri or my sisters. We were all overjoyed. We hugged each other. Keri jumped right in to hug me, too, and I was very happy to reciprocate her love. The other girls jumped up and down.

“In fact, these are for you.”

Mom dug in her purse and pulled out two bottles of pills.

“Mom, is that what I think it is?”
“Yes, honey. The blue pills are female hormones and the white ones are testosterone blockers.”
“Boy killers! Awesome!”

I threw my arms around my mother and Keri used the opportunity to get me a glass of water. I immediately took my first doses and began my path toward girlhood.

“Now that we have that out of the way, I need to explain the real reason I had you dress in tights and skirts, Michelle.”
“Please do, Mom. Go ahead.”
“I think we all know now that your punishment was not really a punishment. I was pissed when you bruised up Tara, but not that pissed! I did get the idea of you wearing tights from that event, but the real purpose of it has nothing to do with punishment. I think you remember the day about two years ago when Chrissy caught you dressed in her clothes and you hid in the bathroom and changed when I came up the stairs.”

Tara and I were stunned. Chrissy, oddly enough, was not. She had a smug smile on her face. Tara and I had to know what was going on.

“You knew about me, Mom?”
“I knew about what I thought was crossdressing, yes. I wasn’t sure about your true gender until you told me just now.”

I felt a burning desire to know how she found me out.

“How did you know, Mom?”
“Two years ago, after Chrissy caught you in her dress, I knew something was up when I was talking to Chrissy and you were in her bathroom. After you left the room to take out the trash, I walked into Chrissy’s bathroom to try to figure out what. Chrissy’s dress was hanging on a wire hanger. Chrissy never hangs her dresses on wire hangers. I also saw her tights in the hamper and I knew she had no occasion to wear them. I also knew that Chrissy doesn’t randomly get dressed up. Finally, I could tell that your hair had been braided because hair usually looks a bit frizzy after you take out the braids. So, I asked Chrissy if you had been dressed in her clothes and she confessed that you had.”
“I’m sorry, Michelle, but I knew that Mom had figured it out and I wasn’t telling her anything she didn’t already know.”
“That’s okay, Chrissy. I probably would have done the same thing.” I gave her a hug. “So, Mom, please continue.”
“Yeah, even I don’t know what happened next,” Chrissy quipped.
“All right then. During the last couple of years I started looking for more signs that you might be confused about your gender, but I never caught you dressed up as a girl again. I noticed that you and Chrissy seemed to have become closer to each other and I thought that was both wonderful and interesting. Anyway, my curiosity grew and about a year ago I called Keri’s mother, who happens to be a psychiatrist.”
“Are you serious?”
“Mom, you knew for a year?”
“Yes, Keri, I did.”
“And that would be why you were so insistent that Michelle attend my party —- and I couldn’t be happier that she did.”

Keri put her arms around me and I leaned my head backwards against hers.

“That is exactly why I pushed that issue, yes.”
“So go on, Mom.”
“Okay. Keri’s mom told me a bit about transgenderism and what to look for. She also warned me that these signs can be hard to see —- other than your shoulder length hair, that is. Anyway, that was all we talked about. So I started looking for the kinds of signs she described and I thought I might be seeing some, but I just didn’t know. Finally, a few weeks ago, my curiosity began to get the better of me. I knew you had been dressing fully as a girl for at least two years and probably longer. I thought it was reasonable to assume that you might want to be dressed as a girl everywhere and not just in secret. I thought that it might a very logical next step for you to begin dressing up around the house without having to hide it. I didn’t want you to have to tell me anything before you were ready, so I decided I would use a scenario wherein you didn’t have a choice. I knew that a fake punishment would be perfect —- and Tara, this is the real reason I didn’t let Michelle stop with wearing a pair of shorts over her tights.”
“Ah, I get it now!” Tara smiled.

Chrissy nodded, feeling smug that she knew all this long before her big sister.

“Anyway, all I needed was an excuse to deliver the fake punishment. Just to be really sure of myself, I asked Chrissy, a few weeks back, whether she thought you might like to have complete freedom to be a girl around the house.”
“That’s why I was struggling not to laugh when Mom dragged you into my room and started dressing you up. I knew exactly what she was doing.”
“You two are starting to scare me,” I kidded.
“Well, all of that sneaking around is officially over with, honey. Anyway, Chrissy said that she just knew that you would love the freedom to be a girl around the house as long as everyone can accept you that way. Of course, we totally accept you, in case I haven’t made that clear. So, a few days ago, when you ran Tara down, I had a perfect opportunity. I did have second thoughts, especially about having you go to the mall as a girl, but then I needed to have you try on the clothes, so it was tough to avoid that one. Anyway, I knew for a fact that you love to wear the clothes. I also knew that you had grown your hair to a girly length specifically because it was girly. When I found out about your dressing, I immediately understood that growing your hair long had been part of dressing up the whole time. With these things in mind, I was sure that it wouldn’t be torture. I also had no idea that you would end up at Keri’s party, of course —- this was only going to be around the house, as I told you. I must admit that I did tell Keri’s mother about Michelle’s fake punishment and I asked her to keep an eye on you and see what she thought. She mentioned that Keri was going to invite Michelle for a visit and Michelle was probably already there. She offered to change her plans and spend some time with the two of you. Thus, when Keri’s mother arrived home early on Wednesday, it was no coincidence.”

I was floored again. Judging by the look on Keri’s face, so was she.

“So, Mom, your plans didn’t fall through. You changed them!”
“Yes, honey, I did. I apologize for barging in on you like that. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Oh, no problem. Just don’t expect me to fall for that routine again!”

I giggled at her.

“Well, I think I speak for both Keri and I when I ask what happened next.”
“I’m glad you asked, Michelle. Well, I guess the next thing that happened was Keri’s little gambit, which she tried right after I opened her bedroom door.”

Keri began to blush and she endeared me in the process.

“I presume you were trying to convince me that Michelle was actually a girl. I must say, had I not recognized Michelle the instant I laid eyes on her, it would have worked —- but Keri, sweetheart, please don’t ever pull a stunt like that again.”
“Jeez, what’d you do, Keri? I know it’s juicy because of the way you’re blushing.”

Keri’s face continued to redden.

“I’ll give it you later, Chloe. Please continue, Mom.”
“All right. So, anyway, I knew who you were and decided to invite you for dinner so that I could interact with you for a while. I know you like Keri and I gambled that would persuade you to stay. Then, during dinner, you gave me your B.S. life story.”

We all laughed out loud.

“Oh, yes, the phony 25 year old sister crap.”
“Yes, Keri, that would be the one. Anyway, when you were seeing Michelle off at the front door, I remembered you were having this party and since Michelle seemed comfortable enough being a girl around Keri and me, I thought it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to be a girl in front of a few more girls —- girls, I might add, whom I know to be open-minded and good-hearted. I never doubted for a second that they would accept you right away. So, I hurried to the front door and roped you into the party. After you left, I called your mother.”
“I knew it,” I blurted, followed closely by Keri.
“So did I. Well, don’t keep us in suspense, Mom. Tell us what you said.”

We all chuckled.

“I told her about the party and your mother thought it was a terrific idea.”
“See, Keri? I knew she wouldn’t cover for us to get me out of the party —- which I couldn’t be happier that I attended.”

I leaned my head on hers again.

“Anyway, within seconds I could hear you laughing with the other girls and I knew you fit in very well. While you were upstairs, I made the reservations for dinner. Keri had mentioned that Michelle would probably be more comfortable if we could have our own room —- and I knew she was right -- so I made arrangements accordingly. During dinner, I got more of a look at you, Michelle, and I knew I was looking at a girl. When we got home from dinner you went upstairs, and a little while later, I went downstairs to make a cup of tea. On the way back to my room, I passed near the guest bedroom and noticed the door was closed. That door, however, is not terribly thick, and I overheard enough of your conversation to know what was going on. I went back to my room, picked up the phone and called Michelle’s mother. I told her to come over for breakfast because we had things to talk about. That’s really all there is to our story, I guess.”

“Well, maybe not,” Keri teased, looking at me playfully.
“That does it, you two. I want to hear about your story. You’ve been all cuddly the whole time you’ve been down here.”

Keri smiled bashfully and nodded her head, with her eyes on me.

“Yes, we have. Last night, we found out how much we love each other. I’m not talking about friendship, either. We’re in love, Mom. I’m a lesbian.”

Keri’s mother gave her an enthusiastic hug.

“So am I, sweetie. Welcome to the rainbow!”

[ Other Stories By Mona Lisa ]

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Comments

Awww^^

That was so sugary sweet and cute!!!!! Why cant the real world be like this? It's so beautiful ^^

 

    I just got to be me :D

 

I know who I am, I am me, and I like me ^^
Transgender, Gamer, Little, Princess, Therian and proud :D

You said it!

I wish the real world could be this way too!. *sigh* A girl can dream, right? :)

Lisa

I think this would have been much better if ...

Jezzi Stewart's picture

... there had been no previous TG history. Once readers know there is a TG history all the suspense, mystery, whatever is gone. I was really looking forward to reading the story till I hit, "Two years earlier, she had walked into her room and found me dressed as a girl from head to toe wearing everything but makeup and nail polish.". After that, everything was sort of anticlimatic. Sorry, it's not just your story. I have trouble finding any story where the protagonist has no previous TG history.

"All the world really is a stage, darlings, so strut your stuff, have fun, and give the public a good show!" Miss Jezzi Belle at the end of each show

BE a lady!

I learned this lesson early on

Aljan Darkmoon's picture

Tara was shocked that her mother was making me dress up as a girl even though Tara had never even been angry with me — and had been partly at fault!

I used to ice skate when I was in Middle School (then called “Jr. High”). One day while at the rink, I had a crash with another skater. We were traveling in the same general direction across the ice, but on converging paths. I never saw her coming, and presumably she did not see me, either.

Our collision was purely accidental; one moment, I was happily skating along, the next I was sitting with my rump on some very cold ice. When I looked up, I found myself completely surrounded by a ring of angry adults stood shoulder to shoulder, who were demanding an apology from me. Clearly by their lights it was all my fault. They seemed to think that I had been negligent at the very least, and that I may possibly have done it deliberately, with malicious intent. That day, I learned that, where females are involved, it is always my fault, because I am male.

But at least they did not try to put me in a dress.

I have since learned the situation need not involve females. With my father, who seldom takes any responsibility for his behaviour in his relationships with family, I am usually at fault because I am his son. Psychiatrists seldom take responsibility either, when their dehumanizing clinical detachment provokes their patients’ anger. If I took exception to their “bedside manner,” that too was all my fault.

They did not try to put me in a dress, either. (Instead, my father threw out my girly shoes whenever he found them, and one psychiatrist invited me to bring a pair to session…and then tried to shame me out of wearing them.)

Trust

Aljan Darkmoon's picture

Amusing story. In Real Life™ I’ve had people “arrange” things for me like that, except that it has seldom been for my benefit. I don’t know how others feel, but I have trust issues that get set off when someone makes “arrangements” for me without consulting with me first.

Actually, it amazes me how many people think themselves invulnerable to consequences when they set out to manipulate others. Maybe their relationships have no value to them, but losing a relationship can sometimes be the least thing that happens when people maneuver each other. Fortunately they have the rest of their lives to cry over the consequences if one of their schemes goes horribly wrong, especially when it fails spectacularly enough to make the evening news.

So, even in a fictional story, unless it is written for satire and comedy, I wince when the players scheme, and cringe when the targeted characters laugh it all off. I know it is my “baggage,” but I really cannot relate to that.

Welcome to the rainbow!

Daphne Xu's picture

Keri and her mom just pushed through an embarrassing situation.

"... please don’t ever pull a stunt like that again." "Keri’s face continued to redden." Okay, I had to go back to Wednesday when Keri's mom barged in on Keri changing clothes with Michelle. So does Keri actually tell Chloe? =)

"These will live in a hidden folder on my hard drive." That's not very useful, since there's always an option to view hidden objects. "I promise not to share them with anyone outside this room without your permission." That sounds like an exact-words promise. Is Michelle sure that nobody else is in this room? Or is she promising only to share the photos with others in this room?

This was a nice, cute, sexy story.

-- Daphne Xu

-- Try saying freefloating three times rapidly.

The punishment

I can relate to this story
But for me it is to late i am to old so i do it in the privacy of my home