Turn Back, Foolish Boy
Steve’s bad mouth catches up to him…
Unknowingly his mother helps him to embrace Stephanie
Once there back home Steph’s asks to speak with her Mom, “Mother how did you know that Lee was really Eliza Morgan?”
She says, “I saw her speak on television and then as part of an on line seminar for women. She is very good and quite knowledgeable.” Steph responds, “I gathered that.”
Mom says, “And I appreciated both her liking you and then backing off as you need time and space to wrestle with yourself. Which brings me to wondering if maybe you should be back to being Steven and not wait until after Christmas or when you go back to school?”
“What makes you say that after I’m finally comfortable being Steph?”
“Well if you want to enjoy Christmas with Staci as her boyfriend, it might be good. Plus the Christmas Eve service will be attended by many people who know you as Steven, not Stephanie. Are you ready for them to see you as a girl?”
“I really was wanting to dress up as Steph for the Christmas Eve Service, but you do have a good point. Can I still be Steph through tomorrow night and change over Christmas Eve morning?”
“I think it should be changing over tomorrow evening at the latest. I don’t want to spoil your dream like day, but tomorrow morning would be even better.”
I smile at Mom, “Tomorrow evening, you said that would be okay. Do you think Monday I could dress as Steph again and enjoy that week as Stephanie? Maybe you could even find someone and we could talk to them about how I feel.”
Mom says, “I’m not sure about next week; let’s wait and see. I better search and call around tomorrow morning to see who we might want to talk to. I doubt we’re going to get in any place soon.”
Mom asks, “So what did you think about Allison and Staci being with us today?”
“I couldn’t have asked for the day to be any better, even if it had only been to window shop. I wanted to be in smaller groups. Everyone else seemed to know that all of us together would be fun. I hope Staci isn’t angry with me because Allison spent a lot of time with me. It seemed Staci enjoyeded to be with the older girls.”
“I think that is why it is important for Steven to be there for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.” Mother asks, “Do you understand the importance of that?”
“I don’t think she would have had as much fun if I was there as Steven. She even enjoyed selecting clothes for me to change into.” Mother is silent until I figured what she was saying. “Oh, I guess. And I was still planning that it was Steven giving her my gifts to her. It isn’t like I am going to always be Steph but so we can have find. I actually thought it was better for me to be a girl as we shopped. I found myself even eating like Staci.”
I am feeling a little uncomfortable, so I ask, “Do you know why Ms. Lee saw me as she did. I thought we were all good girls?” I tell my Mom, “When I was fixing my makeup in the women’s restroom. I thought it was normal for girls to notice and compliment something nice like the fragrance of a perfume. I really didn’t ask to use it, and I said thank you when she was so nice to me.”
Mother says, “She liked you a lot by what she said to me. She was pleased with your thoughtfulness and how you communicated with her. Many girls your age appear as though they already know things and will discount meeting someone like her or pay too much attention. She seemed interested in knowing a young woman who is strong like you but is willing to learn from her and others. I gather she likes giving young women an opportunity to women an opportunity not always given to us.”
I ask, “She wasn’t looking down at us was she? I didn’t pick that up.”
“No she wasn’t,” my mother says. “But she knows what someone can learn from her and that their experience could be life changing. I do not remember how she learned I’m a single parent. But she knows I cannot help you or your sisters as much as I’d like.” What Mom is saying, gets my imagination going.
It isn’t long and I go to bed. I can’t say I went to sleep easily as I’m dreaming with my eyes open. I don’t think I had fallen asleep when I got up to go pee. I noticed that was close to 3:30 a.m.
I am still tired and sleepy when I got up early in the morning. It was, however, no use in trying to go back to sleep. Haley’s the only one else awake and she smiles and greets me. We sit down and she begins to talk to me about Alec. He’s not her boyfriend at least not yet. She asks what I think of him. Even asking, “If you were a girl could you see yourself as someone who would like to date him?”
I’m kind of flattered she asked. We are close, but then again we usually just do things together. We don’t talk together, though she sometimes gets talkative. I know what sports he likes, where he likes playing video games and he and his friends usually gather. Like us he works to help himself. He works at Lowe’s one of the popular building stores. He helps his dad when he can, but working somewhere else and getting someone else’s money makes sense to him.
Haley thanks me with each piece of information. And when I share the last of it, she gives me a big hug and says, “I enjoy talking to you as my sister. If you go out again and I can help you, please ask me.”
“Do you think he’ll be working there today? He says, if he works he starts early.” She pauses, smiles and asks, “Would you be willing to go there and help me look around. I want to look like I’m shopping there, yet give him an opportunity to say hello, even help me if possible.”
I say, “We could go look for paint like you might want to paint your room and make it special. I don’t know if you’d really want me to be going with you. It would look bad for you if he recognizes your brother dressed as a girl.”
She delights me saying, “There’s no way when he sees you that he’s going to be looking for a boy. If we talk I’ll introduce you as my cousin from out of town. Other than ‘Hi’ you don’t need to say anything.”
I am tickled thinking of the possibility. I even think of some nice clothes that aren’t too nice for such a place. I think of tight jeans, but I’m afraid of showing too much. A skirt outfit will probably be better. Mom finds us talking and eating our breakfast.
“So what are you two so busy talking about?”
Haley says, “I want Steph to go with me to where Alec Trewin works. I want to see if we can get him to talk to me. Steph thought, we could go with ideas for redecorating my room. I think that is a great idea; what do you think? We’d like to change and go soon. It would be okay to use the other car wouldn’t it?”
Mom says, “For a boy you’re not yet dating, why do I think you can taste his lips?”
“Mom that’s gross.”
Mom says, “You’re not thinking that?”
I enjoy watching Haley react, “It’s not something a mother should be saying to her daughter. No matter what I’m thinking, a mother doesn’t say that.”
Mom says, “Steph, if you’re going with her don’t you think you should get started fixing yourself up. And who are you going to be if he asks?”
“We already agreed I’d be her cousin Stephanie. I thought I could be Stephanie Green from Silver Springs, Maryland.” Haley likes the idea as we have cousins there and they have a friend Leslie Greene. I’m off to change, not really wanting to be getting caught up in the adventure and romance of Haley’s.
After I leave to get dressed, Mother asks Haley, “Aren’t you afraid that Steven might be found out and you will be embarrassed?”
Haley giggles, “That’s funny mother, I’m her sister and I don’t usually see Steve when I look at her. I’m kind of embarrassed that my brother can look as attractive as Steph. We’ll be careful. If I can find a color of paint that I like can I buy it?” Haley goes to change and get ready to go find Alec at his work place.
I see Haley going to her room and ask, “Haley do you have an old pair of leggings that I could wear?” She goes to her room having indicated she wants me to wait. The leggings she brings out are fairly new, but she explains that they have a lot of brown. I already know she doesn’t care for brown.
“You can have these and I don’t want them back. I used them once only to be able to tell Aunt Mollie I wore them.”
I have a long knit sweater dress that Elle discarded to wear with them. The sweater is beige and Haley agrees they’ll work together fine. She shakes her head, “A boy should be ashamed he has the legs that look that good in leggings.” She kind of laughs, so I give her a hard time.
“I don’t need to go with you. You can call up a friend or go alone.” I was sure she didn’t want to go alone. I was doing my makeup and hair when she came in with a pair of 2” mules. I am surprised that they fit, because her feet are usually a full size smaller.
I finish and I’m ready; even grabbing my fluffy winter coat and ready to go down stairs when Elle comes out of my room. She looks me up and down and says, “How come you came into my room, and woke me? And who said you can wear my shoes? You’re already getting worse than Haley.”
I say, “It was Haley who woke you up and got your shoes. I should have guessed when they fit and looked nice that they could be yours.” Elle smiles, but she’s usually more careful; not liking me to see her in her teddy bear pajamas. I’m guessing, seeing me as Steph somehow changes that.
She comments, “If she got them does that mean you’re doing something with her this early in the morning?” I say, “Yes.” And she says, “You look good in that outfit, who chose it?”
I feel good and take it all as a compliment. I ask, “I should be back by 10, 10:30. Do you think you can help me find a gift for Haley?” Elle agrees.
I go hopping down the stairs until the noise of the thick heels and skirt bouncing up my legs reminds me not to do it. I have mother’s attention by the time I get down the stairs. “I see you learned before you made it all the way down. I turn one way and then the other, hoping my mother will compliment how I look.
We are soon out to the car; it’s rare treat that I’m in the front seat. They usually tease Haley about her crazy driving, but I think she drives very well. We were cut off by a crazy driver and I think she did real well. I tell her, “I’m going to tell Mom how well you handled the car there.” She tells me not too, “Don’t Mom will still assume I did something wrong.”
“When we get there you can help me find the right aisle, but I don’t want you talking to him. I don’t want to chance he’ll recognize you.” She asks, “Do I want to order glossy or plain paint?
I say, “He doesn’t even know me as Steve. How could he recognize me?” I tell her, “I suggest the satin finish. I think the glossy paint is like for the bathroom or a baby or small child’s room. Because it’s easier to clean.”
It took us fifteen minutes to get to the Lowe’s store. I check my hair and makeup in the mirror drop down mirror. Haley does the same as me, but she giggles at me for doing it. We go in through the main entrance and back to the middle aisle. This way we can look down the aisles in both directions. It is about seven aisles in that we reach the first of the two paint aisles. This one has stains and painting supplies, like brushes, tape and even paint sprayers. Alec is here, but we decide to go to the second aisle where the paint is along with small cards showing the different paint colors that are possible.
Haley sees cans of paint marked pink and I tell her we want to look at the cards of paint. Each card has five shades of pink, and there are numerous cards with shades of pink pink, red pinks, coral pinks and peachy pinks. She likes the lighter shades of pink and the rose color reddish pinks. Having two different cards of each we decide it’s now time to go to Alec’s aisle.
I think she’s ready to panic, she hesitates as Alec looks up. He smiles seeing Haley and straightens up. “Hi Haley, can I help you?” He looks at me, “Your friend looks like she is related to you, but she’s not your sister. Elle was ahead of me in school I know her.”
Haley usually goes out in groups of girls or girls and boys. I guess she’s still shy and not use to talking to boys one on one. I can tell she really likes him. She wants to flirt a little but stumbles in trying to say anything. “I, I… I’m going to repaint my room and I’m not sure. How does a girl know which pink to get?”
She holds the colors at arm’s length. Alec takes them and is looking at them when he asks, “Do you want the eggshell finish or a semi-gloss?”
She turns to me saying, “I thought I was to ask for a satin finish. Sorry, I probably look silly.” She reaches for the sheets as she wants to turn around and flee away.
Alec is good, he says, “I’m sorry I should have offered the satin finish that’s a good choice. One paint company calls their paint like that ‘eggshell’. It is their samples you’re looking at. I can find your pink in the Olympic paint, they have the satin finish.”
Haley now relaxing, “Why aren’t you playing basketball this year? I thought you played basketball and baseball.”
He says, “It got to be too much with basketball, baseball and our band. It conflicted too much with the band playing gigs on weekends.” I realize he’s not talking about the school band. “We could have been playing tonight and tomorrow night, but two guys in the band are gone with their families.”
Haley says, “Tomorrow night is Christmas Eve, you don’t play on Christmas Eve.”
Alec says, “We did last year and had a request for this year. That might be why the guys had to go with their families. Now, I have a family friend here. I haven’t a date for myself, don’t worry about him. But he wants to go out tonight.”
I’m frustrated, when they talk around the possibility of Haley and a friend going with them. Finally I say, “Haley has plenty of friends, why don’t you ask her?”
Alec laughs, “Sorry, but I can’t be hitting on customers for dates. I’d be fired if I got caught or the girl complained.” He looks back at Haley, “Now which of the colors do you want me to blend for you.” He says, “This one’s a reddish pink and that one’s a brighter peachy pink.”
Haley says, “I don’t usually ask boys out, but what if I could find another friend? What did you have in mind for tonight?”
He says, “Casey would like to go to a place we could dance.” Alec has set a machine to mix the first pant sample, when he asks, “Would it be possible for Case to take your cousin here to go dancing tonight?”
Suddenly it is me who’s defensive. “I can’t, I mean her friends are a year older. Surely he would want to date one of them.”
Alec says, “I’m not sure of your name or age, but I’m pretty sure he’d like you. That’s important for getting him a date.”
Haley speaks up, “I’m pretty sure it won’t be a problem for us to go with you. But she’s going to be gone tomorrow and Christmas day. My younger brother will be back then.”
I am not sure what to say to get out of this. I kind of like being Steph, on the other hand I’m hoping Mother will say no. I need to get back to being Steve for Staci.
Haley asks, “Do you have a picture of your friend?”
Alec says, “I don’t think so.” But he calls him, saying “Casey, I’ve been asked out and this girl would be your date if you’d like to go out dancing.” Haley asks, if Casey can show himself.
Casey says, “She looks very nice and she’s fashion conscious I like that.” He puts his phone on camera mode. It is hard to tell, but I suspect most girls would find him at least as attractive as Alec.
I am now the one trying to focus on the paint samples which no one else is as interested in any longer. Haley says to me, “Please do me this favor, Steph. You even have a nice outfit that you can wear. It should be a good time for both of us.”
Alec says, “I think you’d like the reddish pink, but maybe a shade lighter. Why don’t you take and show this to your mother and get her approval.” That helps us to get out of there and I’m very relieved to be going.
We’re going back to the car and Haley give me a huge hug and cheek kiss. “Thanks Sis, I owe you.”
I say, “I hope not; I hope mother vetoes everything saying I’m to be changing back.”
I am nervous and need to hurry off to pee once we’re home. That gives Haley a chance to plead her case to mother about me going on a date. Mother says to me when I get to them. “You knew quite well Stephanie that I want you changing back tonight. Eleven, seven or five hopefully won’t make much of a difference, but I do not want you to be complaining later. Make sure you shower tonight and again in the morning, do you hear me.”
I am not home long enough to change clothes as Elle’s ready to help me shop for my sister Haley. She doesn’t tell me that Haley wants Elle to buy something similar for me. I’m thinking of a mini-dress that Haley might enjoy wearing out with Alec or another guy friend. I can’t believe the hot little dress I’m thinking of for her. Elle agrees with me that it is within Haley’s taste and style. She’s a very attractive young person though she doesn’t usually see herself like that. Being able to buy it and get a gift receipt makes it less traumatic in buying.
We have enough time to do some fun shopping and Elle says she wants more sister time with me. Elle finds a miniskirt at another store with a blouse that we both like. She even gets me to try it on for fun and to see how they really look together. She has a friend Millie that she’s thinking of buying it for. I met Millie only once but, I can’t imagine her wearing the outfit. Elle reminds she knows Miollie a lot better. I like changing into it, in the privacy of the changing room. It takes more courage to leave that comfort of the changing area to show my sister. She’s taking pictures to send to her roommate Susan. It’s fun for a moment to get into having a good time until I see two guys staring at us.
I change back and hang the skirt and top on hangers to be placed on a rack to be put back to properly. Elle to my surprise is already at the check-out paying for the outfit in the sizes her friend needs.
Mom has fun with me when I return home as I tell her what I bought for Haley. She says, “I can’t see you buying anything like that for your sister even a week ago.” Mother then talks seriously with me about my date tonight. “You be careful young woman. You already know what a guy might be thinking.” With her watching, Elle practices with me twirling away from a guy; not depending on him to catch or hold me. It is funny seeing Elle take the other person’s role and me being the girl.
It is four thirty when I begin getting ready to go out. I know it would be another hour, before I as Steve would get ready for Staci. I had talked to Staci about seeing her tomorrow and Christmas Day. She’s cool to me, but glad I’ll be back as Steve. When I mention being Steph again during the week, she is a little put off. She encourages me to remain her Steven the coming week. “Stephanie is for when I want you as my Barbie/Ken boy. I’m sure we’ll get you dressed up again.”
I take a quick shower, with a girly bodywash of Elle’s. The fragrance is very nice, yet not too strong. I should still be able to use a perfume. I wash carefully not to get my hair wet. It is a bit crazy as I’m perfecting tucking my boy parts away and I use a thin pad for extra security. I even remember to pat myself dry leaving my skin soft and moist though it’s not noticeable.
Once I’m back to Elle’s room there is a pink skirt and a silvery top out for me to wear. The panty and bra are mine that others bought me at Peddler’s Village.
Mom knocks at the door but stays out at my request. “I just wanted you to know I called around and a Doctor Martin Hopps was recommended by two people. I called his office and he’ll see you but that will be in February or late January. But he wants you to see his associate Dr. Connie first. “She has an opening this Tuesday at 10:15 at the Cedars office. They say, “If you come in as Stephanie that would be good for them. So make sure you’re not planning anything in conflict with that.”
I have pantyhose on and put on the skirt quickly, saying, “Mom, you can come in now I’m descent now.” She’s not going to until I say, “I need your help.” I was ready to put on my blouse, but my bra doesn’t feel right. I am standing in front of her being very serious and mother is holding back a laugh. She fixes a strap and takes out the socks I’m using as breasts. She says, “They’re close but you should have used one of each sock in each cup to keep the two sides balanced.” They had looked the same to me earlier, but as mother helps fix them the difference is noticeable. She points out that this blouse has more buttons closer together. “Among other thing they’ll help keep a boy’s hand out of there.”
Mother and Elle are in and out as I’m doing my makeup. Elle reminds me to use little dots of a concealer and foundation, but chides me for not using enough color for evening wear. I had to clean off one eye as I went too heavy. Mother says, “You really don’t need more mascara but let me use some more on you.” Mother explains that she wants my eyes noticeably different from Steven’s.
Haley and I are both ready early and I’m tempted to go back and put leggings on. The day had been cold enough and I’m already finding my legs too cold. But mother tells me not too as she thinks the guys are here. The car does pull in to the driveway and she says Casey looks slightly taller. Elle says both guys are buff and even show a little class. Everyone allows them to get to the house and ring the doorbell. Haley answers the door and welcomes them into the house. Both of them notice when mother enters the room. Casey thanks her for letting him take me out on such short notice.
Without missing a cue, mother says, “You better be good to her and not take any allowances. I have to answer to her mother and dad if something should happen.” She turns to Alec, “It is nice to meet you young man. I’ve seen you about and know you family, but I think we haven’t met.”
Alec pretty much said the same thing. “I even know Steven from some dances coming with Staci Miller. I’m better at noticing the girls. I know some of their boyfriends good enough to recognize them.”
Mom says, “Her parents are bring back Steve in the morning when they pick up Stephanie. They’re both named for the same great grandfather.”
Casey says, “Nothing against your daughter Mrs. Hammond but I’ll be very happy to take your niece out. I guess I need to thank Haley for finding me this attractive date.” Alec says he knows her friends and Steph is as beautiful and as personable as any he’s met. Casey walks over to me and soon after he takes my hand my hand is at his back and his arm is around my waist.
I want to laugh as he helps me with my coat. He’s wearing a fall jacket which it is easy to tell that he he’s in very good shape. We’re walking out the door saying, when mother adds, “Stephanie, you’re like a third daughter to me. Have a great time, but.” She didn’t say anything more. Getting in and scooting over in the vehicle; I notice similar feelings to when I was with Brad. We’re going to Demetri’s…
To be continued…
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