Tragedy of the Spirit part 8 Life on the road

Printer-friendly version

Part 8 Life on the Road Begins

All material is copywrite 2008 by Prairie_girl_64 (parts 1 thru 8)

After my Brutal rape and assault by Adam , I sat down and talked with Jenn about what had transpired. She asked me how I felt.

Jenn " How do you feel about what happened to you? I know you went through hell with your dad and brother, how do feel about a repeat?"

My response was " Well I am scared like hell and upset, I just cannot make sense of this whole episode, is this the life I want or am destined to live?"

Jenn " I am not sure I can answer that for you hun, that is something you and you alone have to decide."

All I could do was nod my head as if in agreement. She went on to ask me if I enjoyed it. I told her "in a sense I did, it was a sense of belonging, a sense of love." All she could do was shake her head. I truely believe that years after all this personal hell I went through, she was the one person that never criticized me or my actions.

Several days past and I was dressed in my tight black skirt and white tank top. I decided to go for a walk while Jenn was at work. I wandered down to the local video arcade and some other minor shops along 12th avenue. I entered the jewlery shop and browsed about. I ended up purchasing three pair of earings, whales, dolphins and starfish.( I still have them today). I then ventured to the vdeo arcade as I was very curious as to what was there. I had never been subjected to video games or the like. Growing up in rural Canada, you only had three television channels (the two local ones and a french station). Upon entering the arcade who did I spot but Adam, and he noticed me right off the bat. He came over to me and said "Hi". I just noddeed my head.He took my hand and lead me to the open area of the arcade where his freinds were. I was introduced to 5 guys, Ken, Gordon, Phil, and Stan. After introductions were made, the guys went and finished doing whatever it is what guys do in a arcade. Adam stayed by my side. He had a firm grip on my hand and wouldn't let go. I finally broke the silence between us by stating " why dis you rape me last night?" He Smled and said " He wanted to cause I was to much of a slut and deserved to be raped". I replied by saying " that was mean and nasty, do you not care about me? Or is all sex with you?". He nodded his head and said, "both". I had a quizical look on my face and asked him " if you cared then why rape me?" He said " cause he wanted to and I was going to regardless if you wanted it or not" Then he went on and said " because I can do what I want with girls and I KNOW I can with you". I was shaking by this time and told him I had to go as Jenn would soon be home and I told him I needed to go. He kissed me hard and winked at me then stated " we shall meet again for more fun, very soon". I left.

I arrived home 20 minutes later and told Jenn what happened. All she did was nodd her head and said" your choice how you want to live hun". After dinner Adam showed up and things progressed from there, I wnet out with him(reluctant)and we met his freinds and well I ended up doing them all more than once in both my mouth and rear. I was so sore and crying when I arrived home several hours later. I crawled into the tub and cried some more and tried to wither the pain away. The next day Jenn was gone before I woke up. I made a decission well I ate. I wrote a note to Jenn.

Dearest Jenn,

I have decided on my path and that is a life that was set by my father and my family. I am leaving here and will contact you when I reach my destination. I will be on the road for a while. I have no idea for how long. I am not sure what I will do, I do know that I will somehow manage. I love you and as a freind I will cherish that freindship forever. Please do not worry. I will contact you when I can.

Love
Mellissa

PS. if for some reason you are contacted by Adam, tell him you have no idea where I went.

I set off to go North. A city about two and a half hours away. I began my life on the road and my survival. I was not sure what I would find, yet alone what I could do. I was only a grade eight graduate and well not many oppertunities for a grade eight young boy that looks like a girl. I had grown my hair out and was a lovely dark red and wearing heels and a short mini skirt I was statuesque at 6 feet 2. I was still rail thin and today I am still relatively sexy I think. I found a small place not far from the main drive and settled into this place, it was low cost hotel, fifteen dollars a day or a monthly rate of two hundred. I began my street education that night when a a guy of about 40 years old paid me 200$ for sex. I was not looking for anything just walking to the store. It dawned on my after that I could make some serious money at this. Each hour or so I was making money. tall asian male approached me and told me I could work for him, I told him no. Several others whom had wittnessed the conversation told him not to push it as they were with me. Wow I thought. new in town and new to this and I began to make freinds right away. The first girl I met , her name was Mandi, the second was trish and the third and forth were cathi and claire. This guy never stood a chance with them let alone with me. I soon began making serious money and by the end of that first night I think I made about four hundered dollars. Mind you I had been out there for at least elelven hours.

I decided to make a effort to get a bank account and save some money so if there was a chance of going to school I would or anyplace I ended up I might settle down. As the nights and weeks passed on I ended up leaving to go west and see what was out there. I had written a letter to Jenn saying I was okay and not to worry. I made about five thousand dollars for the time I was with the girls working on the corners and making many good clients. One client I really got to know and always tipped me more than I felt I was worth. His name was Kendal, he was somehot shot business type.

I moved on and kept making freinds and doing my nightly strolls on the corners. Mostly by bars and disco's etc. I ended up banking alot of what I made anyhow. I was propositioned by a lot of guys that told me I could work for them and they would give a great life. Yeah right. I became very street wise and savvy well working in the two cities so far. Who knew that this skinny little freak that my parents called me would be this street wise girl and would not take shit from anyone. I guess looking back now I know I messed up while on the streets. I will always hold what I did as survival and I gained my esteem back and some self worth. Even it is well misplaced. I had alot of regular clients and always treated them to the best time they ever had. I worked from 3 in the afternoon tol well past dawn the following morning. Sometimes sixteen to eightteen hours each day. The money was not great. However it helped me live as best I could. I always wore tight short mini skirts and low tops and my breast began to grow as I was able to get birth control pills at the pharmacy or from my freinds. Where ever we went after work, we were gawked at and even propositoned and sometimes we took those new clients to new hieghts in pleasure. I was raped and began to actually enjoy it. I found that after each encounter, I was seeking love and acceptance and approval from my potentional clients and I recieved payment for this. After 5 months there in the north I went west by GreyHound and found a different style of clients. These were rich and would pay alot to have a "girl" like me. The times were rich and the men were hot and I grew in both stregth and stamina. I could go all night if I had to with certain clients. I will let you know I never drank or did any drugs while I was doing this and I am proud I never did. After 3 months there and made alot of money I ventured west farther than I expected. I ended up near the Pacific Ocean. I relished the scenerey, the skyline, the air of the city. I started working the streets in late JAnuary of my 16th year. I guess I had been on the road doing my thing for almost a year and a few months when I ended up on the coast. I stayed there working til late summer, when I got bored and headed east and did not know where I would end up. Several days later I ended up 8 hours from where I first started off so many months before (the city where Jenn lived). I guess it became routine for me, I would pick up my clients on the main drag and then have the required sex and get dropped off. I did make alot of freinds in this line of work and we came to protect each other. We had a system if you could call it that, if we were not back in a specific time them one would ask his/her client for help finding us. My habit became I would write the plate numbers of my clients down and I also had my journal with me each and every night I was strolling for money. I stayed there for 7 months before I got bored and decided to head west again to a the boom town I call it and see if I could make some more money. My life on the road.....pleasure/pain/enjoyment....I hardly think so. I do know this ..I grew up really quickly after I left home which seemed a lifetime ago, and I guess it was. I continued to write Jenn when and where I could. I guess my road life was beneficial and yet continued with my suffering and pain.......

TO BE CONTINUED

** Footnote here. The west coast city I was at before heading east made alot of headline recently with Robert Picton. I strolled the same street corners as the girls he murdered.

Copywrite 2008

up
95 users have voted.
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos! Click the "Thumbs Up!" button above to leave a Kudos

Comments

A Rough Life

Reading your diary I kept asking myself how many choices you had at the time?

marie c.

marie c.

I know, however......

I did not have too many . My eyes were sure opened tho as time went on.

Mellissa

Prarie Girl, This Chapter Made Me Cry

I hate it that you had to prostitute yourself to gain a sense of self-worth. i would treat you like a queen and NOT force you to debase yourself. I hope that you have overcome the hell and demons of your past and that your not paying for the time of prostitution.
May Your Light Forever Shine

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Hi Stan

I have no STD"S from my time on the street thanks the lord for that miracle. I am sorry that it made you cry when I was transcribing this chapter from my finished transcript i was in tears as well. This is a true sense of cleansing, not in the typical way that most see a cleansing. I am still not at peace from all of that hell. I appreciate the comments that you would treat me as a queen that is very flattering and I am still blushing at that, so thank you. I still pay the heavy burden from tis event in my life, however some day I hope I will eventually find the peace and happiness I so deserve.

Mellissa

God Bless you Stan

Look girl, Jenn should have

Look girl, Jenn should have known better than to let you drift away like that.

She might have been 'open minded' and 'understanding' to your needs and behavior but wasn't she older than you?
And had a work too, don't get me wrong here, I can see she was your friend.

I can see that, but yet she stood aside and allowed you to go to hell again.
Somehow she too must have been treated very badly by life to allow that to happen.

Don't give up, life is a constant search for redemption.
Very few amongst us believe that we are perfect.
And those who do is the worst kind of humans there are.

I find you a honest girl that has grown up in hell.
Coming out pure and trusting us with your story.
Don't worry girl, we love you.

Cheers
Yoron.