“I am the resurrection and the life,' says the Lord. 'Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die.” I take a deep breath through my nose and stare over at my mother’s tear-stained face as the priest continues speaking.

“We are gathered here today to pay our last respects,” the priest announces, “and to celebrate the life of Joan Mary Woodgate, beloved wife, mother and grandmother.” I smile as I feel Stuart grip my hand- even though he’d never met my grandmother, he’d agreed to come to the funeral to support me and my parents, further proving what an amazing boyfriend he is and how lucky I am to have him.

After a forty minute long service, during which my father delivers the eulogy (my mother being too upset to do so), we- along with all the other funeral guests- head to a nearby hotel for the post-funeral reception.

“It was a good service,” Stuart says quietly to my still-crying mother.

“It was,” my father concurs. “A good way to send her off, surrounded by her family.”

“MOST of her family,” mum sniffs.

“I’m sure Sonia would have come if she wasn’t in Australia,” dad says, referring to my distant aunt. “As for Sally…” Mum opens her mouth to respond, but is prevented from speaking by the arrival of a girl- who barely looks thirteen- at our table.

“Um, excuse me,” the blonde girl whispers. “Are- are you Jamie-Lee Burke?” I force a smile on my face despite the circumstances as I turn to face the young girl.

“Hi, yes, yes I am!” I say, making the girl giggle nervously.

“Oh my god, I THOUGHT it was you! Um, could I get your autograph, please?” The girl says, handing me a pen and two napkins, both of which I happily sign.

“Who do you want it made out to?” I ask.

“One to Nina, please,” the girl whispers. “One to Annalise.”

“Here you go, Nina or Annalise!” I joke as I hand the pen and the newly-autographed napkins back to the girl, who quickly scampers off.

“Even here,” dad laughs, bringing a smile back to mum’s face.

“Mum would probably laugh at that,” mum chuckles. “Her celebrity granddaughter getting asked for autographs at her funeral…”

“Excuse me?” An older-sounding voice asks, making me chuckle again. “Susan?” My chuckle abruptly ends as I realise that the woman is addressing my mother, rather than me, though as I turn around I emit a small gasp nonetheless.

“…Sally?” Mum asks as she stares into the face of her estranged sister. “Wh-what are you doing here?”

“Attending my mother’s funeral, the same as you,” My fifty year old aunt- who I haven’t seen at all this millennium- replies. “Mark, it’s good to see you again.”

“Sally,” dad says cautiously.

“And you must be James,” Aunt Sally says, turning her attention to Stuart, who freezes like a rabbit caught in a pair of headlights. “You certainly grew up to be a handsome young man, how old are you now, 23, 24?”

“Um, I-“ Stuart stammers.

“He’s not James,” I say with an air of defiance in my voice. “I’M James. Or rather… I used to be.” I maintain my composure as my aunt’s jaw drops open.

“Wh-what?” Aunt Sally asks with an air of anger in her voice.

“Four years ago I started transitioning,” I explain. “To change my gender from male to female. Legally, chemically and anatomically, I AM a woman. Jamie-Lee Burke, nice to meet you. You may have heard of me from television?” I hold out my hand for my aunt to shake, but much to my dismay, she simply backs away from me.

“And- and you both APPROVED of this?” My aunt snaps at my parents, causing nearby tables to start looking in our direction.

“Yes we did,” My dad says with pride in his voice.

“And do you really think this is the right time and place to be having this argument?” Mum says, making Aunt Sally frown with frustration.

“Do you really,” Aunt Sally hisses, before sitting down next to mum and lowering her voice. “Do you really think it’s appropriate for THAT to be here dressed like THAT?”

“’Her’,” I say, anger seeping into my voice. “The correct way to address me is ‘her’.”

“It never used to be,” Aunt Sally snorts.

“But-“ I shout, before lowering my own voice. “But it is now.” Internally, all I want to do is scream with frustration. I’ve been living as a woman for four years. I’ve been a national celebrity for almost two years. And sure, my public exposure has opened me up to criticism from some small-minded people who refuse to accept the plainly obvious fact that I AM a woman… But I could always write those people off as trolls, idiots not worthy of my time or attention. To hear this bigotry coming from my own family, no matter how long-lost they are… It cuts deep.

“You’ve got daughters, haven’t you?” Mum asks. “They should be in their teens by now… Haven’t they heard of the Angels?” I smile as mum brags about ‘her famous daughter’, but a thought suddenly occurs to me…

“That silly reality show on ITV2?” Aunt Sally scoffs, raising my anger levels even further.

“Your daughters’ names wouldn’t happen to be Nina and Annalise, would they?” Dad asks with a smile, having obviously had the same idea I had.

“Yes,” Aunt Sally says, barely able to contain her own anger. “And I’d thank you to stay away from them!”

“Now I know why we haven’t spoken in fifteen years,” mum spits.

“And won’t do for at least another fifteen!” Aunt Sally hisses as she gets up and walks away. Almost immediately, I feel tears start to well in my eyes as the adrenaline thins in my blood.

“Oh god, Jamie,” Stuart says, giving me a much-needed hug.

“Can- can we leave, please?” I whisper, blushing with shame as mum and dad nod their permission.

“We’ll get the tube home,” dad says with a supportive smile.

“Just remember,” mum says, grabbing my hand as I walk past, “you are Jamie-Lee Burke. You are an amazing, rich, famous woman, loved by millions. You are an amazing daughter, and you would be an amazing niece too if you didn’t have such an awful aunt!” I smile as I leave the reception hand-in-hand with Stuart, glancing over at the table where my aunt is sat with her daughters. I wince at the foul glare my aunt shoots me as I leave, though I can’t help but smile at the awestruck stares I get from the two young women sitting with her- the same young teenager I gave an autograph to earlier and an older girl, almost certainly her older sister. I still let out a long sigh and two small tears as I sit down in Stuart’s car, before smiling as Stuart squeezes my hand.

“It’ll be okay,” Stuart says. “We’ll be back home soon, where you can put this behind you.”

“Yeah, as if it’s that easy,” I sigh.

“Why did your mum fall out with your aunt anyway?” Stuart asks. “Obviously if it’s a sensitive topic-“

“It’s okay,” I say with a smile. “Mum and Aunt Sally fell out because- and you’ll like this- mum disagreed with the person Aunt Sally ended up marrying. Felt he was unsuitable because he worked as a painter. An artist, I mean, he painted portraits in a park, he painted my aunt’s portrait once, their eyes met, and the rest, as they say, is history.”

“And he was the father of the two girls?” Stuart asks.

“One of them, I think,” I say. “Dimly recall her already having a child before she was married and the older of her two girls did look about 17 or 18.”

“So let me get this straight in my head,” Stuart says, barely suppressing a giggle. “The aunt who had a child out of wedlock and who married an artist ISN’T tolerant of your change, but your ultra-tory parents ARE?”

“I guess it’s different when it’s your own child,” I chuckle. “Though you’re right, it IS pretty silly... Any of your aunts or uncles react when you came out?”

“Not got any,” Stuart chuckles. “Both my parents are only children, guess I got lucky, heh.”

“Says the man about to be the coolest uncle of all time!” I laugh, reminding Stuart of his seven months pregnant sister.

“And the woman about to become the coolest aunt of all time within the next week!” Stuart laughs. “Okay, you and Charlotte TECHNICALLY aren’t sisters…”

“I think if we’ve learned anything today,” I chuckle, “it’s that it isn’t blood that makes two women TRUE sisters!” Stuart and I giggle as we drive back into the West of London, soon pulling up outside Charlotte’s (and my) vast home.

“Heyyyy,” Charlotte sighs sympathetically as she greets us both in the entrance hall with huge hugs (despite her seriously expanded belly). “How was the funeral?”

“Mum was distraught,” I sigh. “Then it got infinitely worse when my long-lost aunt showed up…”

“Sounds like someone could use some ice cream,” Charlotte giggles as we head to the living room. “Stuart, you know where the spoons are, right?”

“On it,” Stuart says. “You didn’t give birth whilst we were out, then?” My boyfriend laughs as my BFF playfully hurls a cushion at him, hitting him squarely in the back of the head. Half an hour later, the three of us are laid on the sofa- me laid across Stuart’s slender body- after cooling ourselves down on small tubs of rich chocolate ice cream.

“That really sucks about your aunt,” Charlotte muses. “But it’s good to know her daughters take after their super-cool cousin…”

“Huh, never dawned on me that I have cousins,” I muse. “I just always thought of them as ‘my aunt’s daughters’…”

“The technical term for which is ‘cousins’,” Stuart laughs, earning another cushion in the face. “I bet they’d be more surprised to learn that they’re first cousins of a celebrity…”

“They didn’t realise?” Charlotte asks, giggling as I shake my head. “We should DEFINITELY do something for them! Like, get them round to hang out with us… You know you’re the only one of us now who has young female relatives? Krys and Viks only have younger brothers, Mary’s and Hannah’s siblings are all older…”

“Huh, never thought of it that way,” I say. “But they ARE only cousins, and I’ve never even really met them…”

“Doesn’t matter!” Charlotte laughs. “They’re still family. Even better than that, they’re NEW family! Do you have any way of contacting them?”

“No, none,” I say. “Their aunt basically forbade me from contacting them… And besides, don’t you have enough ’new family’ of your own to look forward to?”

“Hehe,” Charlotte giggles as she rubs her belly. “You can never have too much family. OR friends!”

“Very true!” I laugh as we while away the evening watching television and listening to the latest recordings from Out of Heaven- the girl band Stuart, Joshua and I formed last month (obviously Stuart, Joshua and I aren’t the singers!). Shortly after 10:30pm, I head to bed with Stuart, sighing happily as I snuggle up next to his warm body under my bedcovers.

“Don’t get too comfortable,” Stuart laughs as he wraps an arm around my body. “You might have to get up at any moment to drive ‘mum’ to hospital…”

“Hehe,” I giggle. “At least it won’t interrupt my dilating, now that I only have to do that once a week… Got THAT out of the way last night.”

“I promise I’ll stop being jealous of ‘Mr Orange’,” Stuart laughs, giving me a long kiss on my forehead. “Get some sleep. While you can!” I giggle as I snuggle closer to Stuart’s body, quickly falling into a deep, dreamless sleep.

I wake up the following morning to find Stuart sat on the edge of my bed, already showered and dressed in his typical attire of a pair of old, dark jeans and a dark burgundy-coloured sweatshirt that’s just tight enough to show off his slender but still masculine frame.

“Any reason you left me to wake up by myself?” I ask my boyfriend, who leans into me and gives me a long kiss in lieu of an answer. “…That doesn’t really answer my question!”

“But you enjoyed it, right?” Stuart asks, giving me another kiss.

“Of course!” I giggle, leaning into Stuart to give him a kiss. “So can you try actually answering the question now?”

“I left you to sleep because you’re so beautiful when you sleep,” Stuart says, bring a wide smile to my lips.

“More beautiful than when I’m awake?” I ask.

“…Dead heat,” Stuart laughs. “Asleep or awake, you’re still the most beautiful woman who ever lived.”

“Just a shame I wasn’t born a woman,” I moan, thinking back to yesterday’s ‘encounter’ at my grandmother’s funeral.

“Crap,” Stuart says bluntly. “You ARE a woman. Doesn’t matter how you were born.”

“But-“ I interject before being cut off by my boyfriend.

“And don’t bother arguing,” Stuart says. “You didn’t have all those surgeries just to lay there feeling sorry for yourself because one closed-minded, bigoted woman can’t get past her own prejudices. Strip off the covers, take off your nightie and what do you see?” Doing as I’m told, I fold the covers back and slip off my tiny baby doll, staring down at my naked hairless body.

“...A woman,” I giggle.

“Take it from someone who’s been there a lot,” Stuart says. “Especially in the first two years after I came out… I may not have had any aunts or uncles, but my own maternal grandmother was still alive when I came out. Still is now, actually.”

“I’ve never heard you talk about her,” I muse. “You or your sister…”

“That’s because in her eyes, I am an abomination, an affront to god,” Stuart says. “Her religion is more important than her own flesh and blood.”

“Ugh,” I spit. Despite having been brought up as Christians, both Stuart and I now consider ourselves agnostics, and completely anti-religion- especially any religion that refuses to accept us as who we are.

“Exactly,” Stuart sighs. “She was already upset at mum for marrying someone far older than her, and me… I was kinda the straw that broke the camel’s back. She’s not spoken to me, mum or Becca in AGES because of the way they supported me. I think she still speaks from Emma from time to time, but that’s just because she’s about to become a great-grandmother. Grandma, that is, not Emma!”

“Hehe,” I giggle. “Seems a bit harsh that she’d cut contact with Becca though, how old was she when you came out, eleven?”

“Yeah, more or less,” Stuart says. “But you know how she can be… Especially if I’m late for work! See you later, beautiful.”

“See you, sexy!” I laugh, blowing a kiss at Stuart as he leaves me alone to muse once again on how lucky I am to have him both as a friend AND as a lover. Most men, upon seeing me naked on my bed, would drop everything and rush over to, well, ‘take’ me. And it’s not that Stuart hasn’t done that himself in the past… But I don’t know many men who would see a naked woman laid on their bed and talk candidly about their past.

After a quarter of an hour I decide to get up myself and relax under a long shower, taking the opportunity to shave off any body hair that’s grown in the ten days since my last wax treatment. As it’s still chilly outside, I dress in a plain black bodysuit, a pair of thick black tights, a dark grey sweater dress and brown knee-high boots- a look that my BFF strongly approves of as I head downstairs to find her already up and about, preparing breakfast for the both of us.

“Sexy lady!” Charlotte coos, making me blush. “Is that a new sweater dress? I know how quickly you get through them…”

“Had it a while,” I say, playing with the hem of the short garment. “You’re right though, they are SO comfortable AND fashionable… A better question would be why are you up and about? Let me get breakfast, for crying out loud! What was your due date again?”

“…April 29th,” Charlotte sighs.

“And what’s today’s date?” I ask.

“…Also April 29th,” Charlotte chuckles. “Give me a break, Kate Middleton’s also overdue… And I’m technically not overdue YET.”

“I did feel kinda guilty leaving you yesterday,” I confess. “If you’d gone into labour…”

“…Jon and Viks would’ve known what to do,” Charlotte laughs. “I’m not going to ask you to miss your own grandmother’s funeral on my behalf…”

“I guess that’s the way of the world,” I muse. “One life ends as another begins…”

“That’s too deep for before the first cup of coffee!” Charlotte laughs even louder. “Got anything planned for today?”

“Nope!” I say happily. “Today I belong to you and to Netflix!”

“You COULD always look up your cousins on Facebook,” Charlotte says as we finish our breakfast and head through to the living room.

“No… I need a lazy day,” I laugh. “Gonna get manic enough in a few days’ time, and I’ve been so busy with the band lately…”

“’Lazy day’ it is!” Charlotte laughs, grabbing the Sky+ remote and loading up six back-to-back episodes of Mad Men, which we settle down to watch. Before the first episode has had a chance to end, however, I’m interrupted by a call on my mobile phone.

“Ugh, knew I should’ve switched this off,” I moan, checking the caller ID before answering. “What’s up, Nikki?”

“Hey Jamie,” my ‘protégé’ says. “Have you got a second?”

“Sure,” I say, hoping that Nikki’s problem is indeed one that can be resolved in the space of a second.

“You know how we kinda have a sort-of ‘teacher-pupil’ relationship going on?” Nikki asks.

“Um, yes…” I say.

“Well…” Nikki says. “I’ve kinda, sorta been getting my own ‘pupils’ over the last year or so. Mainly through my association with Teen Globe magazine.”

“Go on…” I say, trying to calm my frustration at my protégé ‘ruining’ my lazy day.

“One of my ‘pupils’… Has kinda had it hard lately,” Nikki says. “She was hospitalised recently with an eating disorder, she’s only thirteen, I reckon she’s probably got depression, possibly even PTSD. I… I kinda want to do something for her, you know? A special day, a happy memory she can keep.”

“Sounds cool,” I say. “Why do you need my help?”

“Umm,” Nikki stammers. “I- I kinda, you know, need advice… Ideas on what to do, maybe if you could speak to her as well…”

“I’ve kinda got a lot on my plate right now, Nikki!” I laugh. “She’s YOUR protégé, surely you know what she likes, what she’d enjoy?”

“Um, I guess…” Nikki says, clearly taken aback by my comparative lack of enthusiasm. “I know she does ballet at Krystie’s school…”

“There you go!” I laugh. “Get her in for a Monday lesson during the holidays, I’m sure Krys will be happy to oblige. Anything else you need help with?”

“No, no, just that…” Nikki says in a feeble voice.

“Okay, talk soon!” I say, clicking off my phone.

“Bit harsh, don’t you think?” Charlotte asks. “Here I was thinking you liked Nikki…”

“I DO,” I insist. “Just- I was looking forward to a little downtime, you know? Unofficial ‘paternity leave’…”

“You only get that if you don’t mind being called ‘dad’,” Charlotte laughs, making me stick my tongue out at her. “What did Nikki want, anyway?”

“Uh, one of her teenaged fans was in hospital lately, she wants to do something nice for her,” I explain.

“Oh, okay,” Charlotte replies, before we turn our attention back to the television. Whilst I do feel a little guilty about brushing Nikki off, she IS an adult, capable of making her own decisions… And if she wants to take a ‘protégé’ of her own- which is entirely her decision- she can’t expect me to take over ‘mentor’ duties when she finds it too hard. I barely have the chance to muse any further on Nikki’s problem, however, before my phone rings yet again.

“Hi Steph,” I say after checking the caller ID. “What can I do for you?”

“Hi Jamie,” Stephanie replies. “Is now a good time?”

“Sure!” I reply after taking a deep breath. Stephanie is one of the singers in Out of Heaven- alongside Becca, Joshua’s niece Adeola and two other girls- but unlike the other four, Stephanie hasn’t always been a girl.

Like me, Stephanie is a transsexual. Like me, Stephanie was estranged from her parents, like me, she started transitioning at the age of nineteen, and like me, she’s found herself thrust into the spotlight with very little time to prepare, so I’ve taken her ‘under my wing’, both professionally as the sort-of ‘coach’ of Out of Heaven and personally as another ‘protégé’ in addition to Nikki. Given how in demand my ‘mentoring services’ are today, though, I’m already beginning to regret that decision…

“I’m struggling a bit at ballet,” Stephanie explains. “The other girls are all so good at it, but I feel like a hippo, like I’ve got completely the wrong body shape...”

“Have you spoken to Krystie about this?” I ask. “I’m confused as to why you’d come to me about this, I’ve never been a ballet teacher…”

“Yeah,” Stephanie says, “but, you know, I’ve read interviews with you where you talk about how you struggled at first, I was wondering if, you know, you had any, um, tips…” I roll my eyes, but keep myself from sighing at Stephanie’s question.

“I had one of the best ballet teachers in the world,” I explain. “So do you… Are you still at the dance studio?”

“No, just left,” Stephanie says. “I can always ask on Monday, I guess…”

“Yeah…” I say, feeling a little guilty at brushing Stephanie off the same way I brushed off Nikki. “You know, she IS your choreographer, I’m sure she wouldn’t mind you calling her, I know she can give you additional lessons if you ask.”

“…Thanks,” Stephanie says, clearly sensing that I’m fobbing her off. “Thanks for the talk, sorry I bothered you.”

“Oh- no worries,” I say, my guilt increasing. “Any time you need to talk, just call.”

“Thanks,” Stephanie says, before hanging up the phone.

“’Any time you need to talk’,” Charlotte laughs. “You certainly sounded like you meant that!”

“…Shut up,” I moan.

“And I’m sure Krystie will be happy to learn that she’s doing all your ‘mentoring’ for her from now on,” Charlotte teases further, making me groan with frustration.

“Godddd,” I moan. “Why can’t I just have a quiet day every once in a while?”

“Because I- and countless others- would be lost without you,” Charlotte says with a warm smile. “You’re either the entire world’s big sister or their godmother.” Charlotte rubs her swollen belly where my latest godchild resides, emphasising her point.

“Yes, yes, point taken,” I chuckle. “But it would be nice to just, you know, have some time to myself every now and again…”

“I believe the technical term for that is ‘holiday’ or ‘vacation’,” Charlotte giggles. “You and Stu decided on a location yet?”

“Oh- we’re not going on holiday this year,” I sigh. “Not with you about to pop…”

“I’ll have long since popped come August,” Charlotte sighs. “I can live without you and Stuart for a week or two if you want to go and get a MASSIVE tan. Stuart’s getting his ding-a-ling done in September, isn’t he?”

“October,” I correct my BFF. “And not the way I’d have put it!” Charlotte giggles as I immediately start imagining my dream summer holiday. “But a break WOULD be really nice right about now…” Charlotte giggles even louder, before handing me her iPad, which unsurprisingly already has several holiday websites open on it!

I spend the rest of the afternoon browsing Charlotte’s iPad for holiday destinations, each one more appealing than the last, and when Stuart arrives home, I (of course) greet him with a long, deep kiss… Before shoving the iPad in his hand and demanding he pick a location!

“Ahh,” Stuart sighs happily as we both flop down on the sofa. “Holiday sounds so good right now… But can we really go when Charlotte- you know…”

“This one will be three months old by August,” Charlotte says, squirming uncomfortably in her chair. “I’ll be fine by then, honestly, you two deserve a holiday!”

“And you know you’ll have all the recording done for the band by then,” I say. “And before you argue that Emma and Lee’s kid will be born by then, can I remind you that she’ll have 12 months paid maternity leave, AND grandparents, AND other godparents…”

“Okay, okay,” Stuart laughs. “I like the look of Gibraltar, nice and hot, people there speak English, and we can go into Spain if we want…”

“Baby may be older than three months by then,” Charlotte says, before gasping in pain.

“Ah- oh shit oh shit…” Stuart says. “Take deep breaths, we’ll get you to my car.” I watch on in near-panic as Stuart leads the heavily-pregnant woman out to his car.

“I’ll get your overnight bag,” I say, quickly running up to Charlotte’s room despite the heels on my boots, joining my BFF and my boyfriend in his car seconds later, bag in hand.

“Did you lock the front door?” Charlotte asks, making me laugh exasperatedly.

“Yes, I locked it!” I say. “Concentrate on your breathing, remember what they taught you in your antenatal classes!” Charlotte nods as she breathes in a slow, controlled manner as Stuart drives us all to the hospital, where Charlotte is quickly put in a wheelchair and taken to her reserved private room.

“God, this is it,” I moan to Stuart as we sit in the waiting area. “Just a few hours from now, a baby… Have you called Keith?”

“Umm, not yet,” Stuart says. “Do you reckon he’d want to be here, though?”

“For the birth of his child?” I ask. “Call him and let him know he has no choice. Call Joshua as well- he’ll probably want to send down a camera crew.” Stuart nods, grabbing his phone and heading outside as I rest my head on the cool white wall. So much for the chance to relax and plan a holiday…

“I’ve called Keith and Joshua,” Stuart says as he returns fifteen minutes later, grabbing my hand supportively. “They’re both on their way. I've sent texts to the rest of the girls. Keith sounds utterly terrified…”

“Can’t say I blame him,” I laugh, only for my face to fall seconds later as Charlotte returns from her room, still in her wheelchair, still sporting a massive belly.

“False alarm?” I ask my BFF, who nods, barely suppressing tears.

“It won’t be long now,” Charlotte’s midwife- a friendly-looking woman in her early forties- assures us. “Baby’s just being a little restless but he’ll make an appearance in a few days. For now, it’s important that Miss Hutchinson gets some rest. Stuart and I nod quietly as we wheel Charlotte back to Stuart’s car. By the time we arrive home, it’s only 5:30pm, but all three of us are exhausted- Charlotte understandably more tired than either myself or Stuart. After ensuring that the mother-to-be is comfortable on the sofa, I head into the kitchen, where my boyfriend is already hard at work preparing our evening meal.

“Frustrated?” Stuart asks, sighing as I nod. “Me too… And it’s not even my kid, heh.”

“Between Charlotte and you, I’m going to be spending a lot of time in hospital this summer,” I whisper, stopping Stuart dead in his tracks.

“Yeah,” Stuart laughs, though I can tell from the way his hands are shaking that the reminder of his upcoming SRS was far from welcome.

“Stu…” I whisper, encircling Stuart’s slim waist from behind. “You- you ARE still, you know…”

“That is the plan,” My boyfriend says. “I’ve lived 25 years without, you know, ‘one’…” Stuart trails off, clearly distracted by the gruesome reality of what his operation will entail.

“No matter what you choose,” I say, “I’ll always love you for who you are. ‘One’ or, well, ‘zero’!” Stuart laughs as we share a tender kiss. Later that night, as we climb into bed, I press my hand into Stuart's crotch, feeling his engorged clitoris squirming between my fingers. It doesn't take long for him to reach a pulsing orgasm, after which he dives beneath the covers, his expert tongue finding its way to my own much smaller clitoris. My own orgasm builds and builds as he teases my most sensitive organ with licks, kisses and tender nibbles, until it feels like my entire body explodes, leaving me gasping for air. Stuart re-emerges from beneath the covers and gives me a long, tender kiss as our heart rates both slowly return to normal.

“As I said,” I giggle as I press my glistening body against Stuart’s, “whatever your body has, I’ll ALWAYS love you.” Stuart smiles happily as he gives me a long, deep kiss, and I fall asleep with a smile on my face as I play with the pale pink scars on Stuart’s chest, imagining what life- specifically, our sex life- would be like if he was ‘complete’…

Unlike yesterday, when I wake up today, my body is still wrapped around Stuart’s slumbering form, which stirs as I squeeze him tighter until he finally opens his tired eyes.

“Morning, beautiful,” Stuart says, lazily giving me a kiss on my forehead. “Got anything planned for today?”

“NOTHING,” I giggle. “Need to be ready for Charlotte… Hopefully today I can actually get some rest. AND plan that holiday!”

“Using a day off to plan a holiday,” Stuart laughs. “Promise you won’t tell Joshua?”

“My lips are sealed if yours are,” I giggle, ‘sealing’ my lips against Stuart’s, before resting my head on his chest and allowing myself to truly relax for the first time in what feels like ages. All thoughts of babies, work, Nikki or Stephanie leave my mind as every muscle in my body seemingly melts into a puddle of jelly… Only to tense up again seconds later as my phone bleeps to inform me of a new notification.

“Well, that was a nice 45 seconds,” Stuart sighs. “Is it Charlotte?”

“No,” I sigh as I read the text message. “It’s Nikki… Asking if I’ve had a chance to think about something she asked me yesterday.”

“Is she having problems?” Stuart asks. “She still working up the nerve to propose to her girlfriend?”

“No,” I sigh. “One of the girls she’s quote-unquote mentoring has been in hospital, she wants to do something to cheer her up…”

“Sounds reasonable enough,” Stuart says. “If Nikki’s ‘mentoring’ her though, why is she asking you for help?”

“Because I’m quote-unquote mentoring HER,” I sigh.

“Ah, so you’re Yoda, Nikki’s Obi-Wan and the other girl is Luke?” Stuart laughs.

“I’m getting a bit fed up of being called Yoda,” I laugh as I swing my legs out of bed and head to the shower, taking the opportunity to relax as the hot water cascades over my naked body. After blow-drying my long blonde hair, tying it into a ponytail and applying my make-up, I pull on a fresh bra and thong set followed by a pair of thin black tights and a casual, long-sleeved short black dress. Stuart, as always, pulls on the same jeans and sweatshirt he wore yesterday, before wrapping his arms around my tiny waist and nuzzling my neck.

“Stop that!” I giggle as I try to pull on a pair of 2”-heeled ankle booties. “We need to be ready to go at a moment’s notice, remember?”

“Yeah, but we could be here hours,” Stuart mumbles into the side of my neck.

“Settle down,” I laugh, freeing myself from my boyfriend’s clutches and leading him down to the kitchen for a large breakfast- which is much needed to get our energy back after last night!

I spend the entire morning on the sofa with Charlotte, waiting for her to ‘pop’, though unlike yesterday I at least have my sexy boyfriend to cuddle up to- though this makes me cringe as I stare over at Charlotte, who is laid out on her sofa all by herself.

“…Did Keith come to the hospital yesterday?” Charlotte asks quietly.

“I called him,” Stuart says. “I texted him before we left, he must have gone home before getting to the hospital. Didn’t he call you yesterday?”

“No,” Charlotte sighs. “Mary called me after I got home, and I chatted with all the girls on Facebook, but not him…”

“He’s not returned my text either,” Stuart says, checking his phone. With Charlotte and Stuart both checking their phones, I take mine out of my bag to discover yet another text message and a voicemail from Nikki.

“Hi Jamie,” Nikki’s message says. “Sorry if now’s a bad time, but have you had a chance to think about what I asked about Laura? Only she’s only off school this week so ideally I want to do something today or Friday, and I know she won’t be at ballet this week either… Can you call me when you get the chance? Thanks…” I sigh with frustration, before hitting the ‘redial’ button.

“Hi Jamie,” Nikki says with a cheerful voice. “Have you had any ideas about what I can do for Laura?”

“Well actually, no I haven’t, Nikki,” I say, barely keeping my anger in check. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I am currently living with a nine months pregnant woman, managing a girl band in addition to my own career and Open University studies! Free time is kinda limited for me right now, if you want to do something for this girl, by all means, but don’t come to me every time you have a mental block!” I take a deep breath as Stuart and Charlotte stare at me, the mouths agape.

“…I’m sorry,” Nikki mumbles after a brief pause. “I- I shouldn’t have bothered you…” I sigh as Nikki hangs up the phone, before my eyes once again meet the accusing stares of my boyfriend and my BFF.

“…What?” I ask.

“First,” Charlotte says in her most authoritative voice, “you’re so far behind on your university studies that you won’t even graduate until next year. Second, Stuart does more managing of that band than you do. Third, the last time you were in front of a camera was at least a week ago, and fourth, I’m the one actually having this baby, all you’re doing at the moment is planning a holiday!” I open my mouth to speak, but have no response to what Charlotte has said.

“…You’re right,” I mumble.

“I think you owe Nikki an apology,” Stuart says quietly, and I sigh again as I nod before hitting ‘redial’ once again, wincing as the call goes unanswered and I listen to Nikki’s voicemail greeting.

“Hi Nikki,” I say in a much kinder voice than the one I used a mere minute earlier. “I’m sorry I snapped at you… I’ve been stressed out a lot lately, my grandmother died a few days ago… But that’s no excuse, I shouldn’t have snapped, I apologise completely. When you get off work come round and we’ll talk face-to-face-“

“Assuming WE’RE not at the hospital giving birth!” Charlotte yells, making me chuckle and roll my eyes.

“…Anyway,” I continue, “I AM sorry I snapped like that, I promise it’s not you I’m angry or frustrated with. Talk soon.” I click off the phone and sigh yet again, chuckling as Stuart wraps his arm around my waist.

“In fairness I’ve lost my rag with Becca before loads of times,” Stuart laughs. “Nikki is effectively your little sister, isn’t she?”

“Yeah,” I sigh happily.

“Ah, that makes me the only ‘only child’ then,” Charlotte sighs.

“Call Nikki back and ask her to bring Sarah around so Charlotte can shout at her,” Stuart jokes, before being bombarded by cushions from both myself and Charlotte!

“In all seriousness… I HATED being an only child,” Charlotte says. “Especially after my mum died and I was home-schooled… Really hope this one doesn’t end up as an only child too…”

“He won’t,” Stuart says confidently.

“And you’re not an only child anymore,” I say with a warm smile. “You’ve got the five best sisters in the world!” Charlotte giggles happily as I hop off my sofa to give her a long hug.

“And brothers too,” Stuart says, joining in the hug. “And, I suppose, nephews and nieces too. I suppose you could call Nikki and her gang cousins…”

“I’ve got the best FAMILY in the world,” Charlotte sniffles happily.

A few hours later, Nikki and Sarah arrive, and I make sure to greet Nikki with a long, sisterly hug.

“Forgive me?” I ask my protégé, who simply nods and giggles.

“I am sorry I kept pestering you about this,” Nikki laughs as she crashes on the sofa with Sarah. “You’re right, she IS my- well, ‘responsibility’ isn’t the right word…”

“She’s as much your ‘responsibility’ as you are mine,” I shrug. “And as you’re my little sister, that makes her your little sister, which I guess means that she’s my little sister too!”

“Aww, you’re Jamie’s ‘little sister’!” Sarah giggles, giving her lover a tight squeeze.

“You BOTH are,” I laugh. “Sometimes I forget what a privileged life I really have, I mean, it’s all very well people calling me ‘one of the most influential’ or ‘one of the most famous transgendered people in the country’, but all of that’s meaningless if I don’t- for want of a better word- ‘use’ this fame to help other people, the way you help your girls with your column in that magazine.”

“I’m hardly Mother Teresa,” Nikki laughs.

“That’s your new nickname,” Charlotte chuckles.

“Also I’m sure Mother Teresa never got up to anything like what we did last night,” Sarah says with an evil grin.

“Okay, enough,” I giggle. “What do I need to know about this Laura friend of yours?”

“From what I know,” Nikki says, “she’s basically everything I wished I was when I was thirteen- ballerina, gymnast… Schoolgirl… I’m sure you know the feeling.” I wish I had… I think to myself. If I’d known ten years ago what I know now…

Nikki and Sarah stick around for the next two hours, during which Nikki and I once again become best friends- the bottle of wine we share certainly helping to ease any remaining tension- and we come up with a plan to cheer up Nikki’s friend tomorrow. I- and, of course, Stuart- climb into bed just after 10pm, still feeling ‘merry’ from the alcohol I drank, which Stuart finds out as I press my naked body into his.

“That’s a LOT of booze you downed tonight!” Stuart jokes, wrapping an arm around my tired body. “But what you did is cool… I guess you’re right in a way, never occurred to me that I could be, like, a ‘role model’…”

“Any ‘new boys’ that come along, I’ll be sure to point them in your direction,” I giggle.

“Meantime, get some sleep,” Stuart says, giving me a long kiss on my forehead. “Don’t want to be TOO hungover for your ‘Jamie’ll Fix It’ tomorrow.”

“We are NOT calling it that, especially not when I’m helping out a 13 year old girl!” I say, giving Stuart a gentle punch in the ribs.

“I wasn’t insinuating anything…” Stuart laughs. It doesn’t take long before we both fall asleep, and when my alarm wakes me the following morning at 7:30am, my head is indeed buzzing- though it’s far from the worst hangover I’ve ever had, and five minutes under the blissfully hot water of my shower clears it completely. I apply a moderate layer of make-up for the day ahead- enough to be glamorous, including silver eye shadow and my favourite scarlet lipstick, but not enough to be considered ‘thick’. I clip on my favourite new necklace- the necklace Charlotte gave for Christmas last year- before pulling on a comfortable bra and thong set, a pair of translucent black tights and a chic, sleeveless dark grey dress. As I’m going to be spending the day with Nikki, who’s 3 inches taller than me, I pull on a pair of stilettos with a 4 inch heel, before spraying on some perfume, grabbing my handbag and heading down to the kitchen- where Charlotte is, of course, already awake.

“Now you DEFINITELY shouldn’t be up this early,” I laugh. “Especially as you’re not going to get another lie-in for oh, the next eighteen-odd years?”

“Oh whatever,” Charlotte laughs. “What time you leaving?”

“When Nikki gets here,” I say. “Assuming she’s not too hungover… I’ve asked her to pick up Hannah to ‘babysit’ you today.”

“Just as long as it’s clear she’s babysitting this,” Charlotte says, pointing to her belly, “and not me!” I giggle as I finish my coffee, before Nikki arrives a short while later. After bidding both Charlotte and Stuart farewell (Stuart will be at work all day today), I jump in Nikki’s car, smiling when I turn around to see Stephanie already sat on the back seat.

“Hey Steph!” I say. “LOVE your skirt!”

“Thanks!” Stephanie replies, smoothing the pleated black miniskirt over her patterned tights. “Didn’t really know what would be appropriate for today… Did you say that we were visiting a 13 year old girl?”

“Yeah,” Nikki- the unofficial ‘leader’ today- replies. “I’m sure you remember being thirteen. It’s not like it was a decade ago or anything…”

“If you weren’t driving us I would tip everything in this glove compartment over your head!” I say to my protégé, who chuckles uncontrollably. “23 is not old…” I have to admit, though, that compared to Nikki and Stephanie, I AM older. The one main thing I’ve taken away from being a ‘mentor’ is that I’ve had to grow up a lot myself in order to be able to pass down some of my ‘maturity’… And as Nikki knocks on Laura’s front door, I can’t help but beam with pride at the way the eighteen year old conducts herself.

“Hello, Mrs White?” Nikki says to the middle-aged woman who answers the door. “I’m Nikki Thomas, we spoke on the phone last night?”

“Oh yes,” Mrs White says with a smile. “Please, please come in!” If I felt old in the car, I feel positively ancient when I enter the living room and meet Nikki’s ‘protégé’- even though I know she’s thirteen years old, she’s very small for her age, looking closer to eleven… But that hasn’t stopped her from wearing make-up, fancy earrings, a fashionable skirt (very similar to Stephanie’s)… With her blonde hair, she’s almost like a miniature version of myself. Again I wonder how different my life would been if I’d discovered who I truly was when I was younger, like this girl so obviously has…

“Hi, are you Laura?” Nikki asks, giggling as the girl jumps off her sofa, gasping in shock.

“Oh. My. God!” The small girl squeaks in a voice very similar to the one Nikki herself used when we first met, which feels like ages ago. “I’m SUCH a huge fan of yours…”

“Thanks!” Nikki says. “These are my friends, Jamie-Lee Burke and Stephanie Abbott… We’re here because we know you’ve been through a lot lately, and we figure that it’s about time you had a ‘win’.”

“So, we’ve clubbed together,” I explain, “and we’ve got you a ‘girly goody bag’.” Laura gasps as Nikki turns over the bulging hessian bag. “It’s mostly filled with cosmetics, some clothes, some promotional material for the Angels and the Teen Angels.”

“And,” Stephanie says with a smirk, “the first ever signed photograph of Out of Heaven, who you may not have heard of yet, but you will soon!”

“Oh my god, thank you so much!” Laura beams.

“All three of us have been where you are now,” Nikki explains. “We know how tough it can be, the obstacles you have to face to be the person you always REALLY wanted to be, so we want to give you something that’s more valuable than anything in that bag- we want to give you our support. On the way over here, all three of us- with your mother’s permission- sent you Facebook friend requests. If you ever have any problems, day or night, just drop us a message.”

“Don’t expect an immediate response, though,” I laugh. “We all have jobs, you have school… But I promise we won’t ignore you if you need our help.”

“Oh my god, this is amazing,” Laura says, visibly on the verge of tears. “Thank you all so, so much… My friends are going to be so jealous!”

“When I added you,” I say, “I noticed that we had a mutual friend in Viks Brooks- how do you know her?”

“Um, she’s my boyfriend’s sister,” Laura explains.

“Small world!” Nikki laughs, prompting a girlish giggle from the four of us. “Well, you’re part of an even larger family now!”

“No wonder Krystie calls you her ‘Little Angels’!” I joke, prompting another mass giggle. Nikki, Stephanie and I stay at Laura’s house for another 45 minutes, listening to her stories about her friends, her school and her fledgling acting career. By the time we leave, it’s clear that all three of us have grown to like Laura, despite her youth.

“Got any other kids we can help?” I ask as I get back in Nikki’s car.

“Got the charity bug?” Nikki laughs. “I will admit, that did feel REALLY good, doing my part to bring a smile back to her face… Kinda like a transgendered make-a-wish or something.”

“Get used to that Steph, you’ll be more famous than all of us combined in a few months’ time!” I laugh, making the brown-haired singer giggle nervously.

“Did you hear Laura talk about her acting and her dancing?” Stephanie retorts. “Give it five years, SHE’LL be more famous than all of us combined!” The three of us all laugh as we head home, our hearts warmed by our good deed. Immediately as I arrive home, I head up to my laptop and switch on my laptop to start brainstorming ideas. Nikki talked about what we did today as a ‘charity’- and it’s a sad fact that there are many girls- and boys- in Laura’s situation that could use the services of an organisation who can offer counselling, support, morale boosters… Plus, on a purely selfish note, it’d be nice to get my tax bill down a little from where it was last month!

I make note of several ideas for all manner of things, including possible services, links to service providers, fundraising opportunities and even a few charity names, before closing my laptop and heading downstairs, where I’m immediately greeted with hug from Hannah.

“Hey fairy godmother!” Hannah squeaks.

“’Fairy godmother’?” I laugh as I sit down next to the tall, bubbly girl.

“You spent all morning granting wishes, didn’t you?” Hannah laughs.

“I sent a Facebook friend request,” I laugh. “And gave away a bag of our surplus crap…”

“You made a difference to her, though,” Hannah says. “That’s the main thing. It’s just a bag of crap to you, but to her, it’s a gift from someone who took time out of her busy schedule to do something nice. She won’t forget this for a long time, even if you do.”

“Next time I do this, I’m not wearing a costume,” I laugh.

“That’s the weird thing about being famous,” Charlotte muses. “So little to you can mean so much to someone else, kinda like to your cousins earlier in the week.”

“Thank you for reminding me about that,” I say, grabbing my iPad off the coffee table.

“Oh, are these the girls at the funeral who asked for your autograph not knowing that you were blood related?” Hannah asks.

“The same,” I say with a smile. “I’ve decided I’m going to ignore my aunt, track them down and shoot off a friend request to both of them.”

“Atta girl!” Charlotte laughs. “Do you know where to find them?”

“I’m asking my mum for their surnames,” I explain. “They’re bound to have Facebook accounts, I think one’s eighteen and one’s thirteen…” Like Nikki and Laura, I think to myself.

“Whilst you’re waiting for a response,” Charlotte says, “Where are you going for girls’ night tonight?"

“With you two days overdue?” I ask. “Seriously?”

“It’s still Friday,” Charlotte chuckles. “That means it’s girls’ night- day- night- whatever…”

“I. Am. Not. Leaving. You. Alone!” I reply.

“Relax!” Charlotte laughs. “Besides, I arranged my own ‘babysitter’ tonight.”

“Who?” I ask. “Stuart’s staying at his parents’ tonight, all the other girls are coming out, apart from Lauren, Dannii and Kayla, who are only seventeen… Is it one of them? I didn’t know any of them could even drive…”

“You’ll see,” Charlotte says in a coy voice. Two hours later, my jaw drops as I answer the front door and stare straight into the perfectly-formed face of Keith Michael Hartley, who beams a genuine smile at me.

“Hello Jamie,” Keith says, speaking as though we were old friends- which I guess we technically are. “Is my son in there? And, also, the woman he’s currently inside!”

“Umm, yes,” I say, watching in a state of shock as Keith heads into the lounge, greeting Charlotte with a friendly hug as though THEY were old friends- which I guess they technically are too.

“Umm…” I mutter.

“Girls night!” Charlotte says. “Go on, shoo!” I nod as I head upstairs with Hannah, and before I realise what’s happening, I’ve already applied my thick clubbing make-up and changed into one of my tiny black dresses, ready for the night ahead.

“…Keith!?” I ask incredulously.

“He IS the baby’s father,” Hannah shrugs. “And he and Charlotte are back on speaking terms…”

“Yeah,” I sigh. “But, you know, Keith!?”

“Oh, relax!” Hannah giggles. “Just enjoy the night! You’ll be knee-deep in nappies here before you know it… Probably- hopefully- next week, in fact!”

“You’re right,” I say as I pull on my skyscraper stilettos and head down to the Angelmobile, giving Charlotte a hug on the way out. As always, the night is fun- the nightclub managers bend over backwards to accommodate us, reserving the VIP area for our exclusive use and plying us with free drinks, and as I arrive home just after 2am, I feel tired and yet exhilarated- though my worries return yet again as I see Keith’s car still parked in the driveway. Before I head to bed, I briefly stick my head round the door of Charlotte’s nursery- well, her son’s nursery, I guess- and sure enough, Keith is in there, curled up in a sleeping bag on the floor. Logically, if Keith’s still here, Charlotte will be as well, so rather than wake her, I head straight to bed, waking up the following morning to the smell of bacon filling the house. Rather than shower and THEN get the smell of cooking in my hair, I instead head downstairs immediately to find Keith and Charlotte sat at the breakfast table, enjoying their first meal of the day. It’s not the first time since their separation that they’ve eaten like this, but every time I see the two of them together, it just feels… Strange. As though it was meant to be, but at the same time, it ISN’T meant to be.

“Hey Jay!” Charlotte giggles. “Have you heard the good news? Someone’s in labour…”

“Umm, you don’t LOOK like you’re in labour,” I say as Keith hands me a much-needed bacon sandwich and a cup of hot, sweet coffee.

“Not me, silly!” Charlotte giggles. “Kate! Kate Middleton’s in labour. My- sorry, OUR son could be the twin of a prince or princess!”

“Ideally princess,” Keith laughs. “That way I can go to a royal wedding as father of the groom!”

“No, this one’s already promised to Kristina-Leigh!” Charlotte laughs, rubbing her belly.

“Eh, she can marry Prince George then,” Keith laughs, before checking his phone. “Ugh, text message from my mum, she wants to know when I’ll be home…”

“Well, Jamie’s up now,” Charlotte says. “If I start, you know, ‘popping’ she’ll drive me to the hospital!” Not before I shower, I won’t… I think to myself.

“Okay,” Keith says with an air of sadness in his voice, before standing up and giving Charlotte’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “See you later, Charlotte.”

“Yeah,” Charlotte whispers. “See you, Keith.” Without another word, Keith finishes his coffee and leaves, and as the sound of his car starting reaches the kitchen, tears start running down Charlotte’s face.

“Oh god, Charlie,” I say, embracing my BFF. “You STILL love him, don’t you?”

“It never gets any easier,” Charlotte sobs into my shoulder. “Seven months, you’d think it’d get easier… Jamie, do you- do you still, you know, ‘like’ him?”

“…Not really,” I say. “I mean, yes, I remember, you know, ‘liking’ him, but those feelings… I’ve had a chance to work through them, put them behind me.”

“I really, really wish I knew how to do that,” Charlotte moans.

“You’ll find someone, seriously,” I say. “I thought I’d never find anyone after I split from Paul, but now look at me and Stuart…”

“You’re so lucky he forgave you,” Charlotte says, before pausing as she realises exactly what she said. “Umm, by which I mean, umm…”

“You’re right, I AM lucky,” I say. “I think that every day I’m with him… But do you know how else I’m lucky? I’m lucky YOU forgave me, and that I have you in my life.”

“There really was nothing that needed forgiving,” Charlotte laughs. “I was the bitch… You know I was home-schooled from when I was fourteen, right?”

“Yeah,” I reply.

“…And I was possibly the most spoiled girl in the history of the world,” Charlotte sighs. “Anything I wanted, I got… Including Keith.”

“How did you two meet, anyway?” I ask. “I know you said once that your parents and his were friends…”

“Work colleagues, really,” Charlotte says. “The summer after I turned fifteen, daddy held a barbecue here for his colleagues, I saw Keith across the patio, and I just… I knew then that he was the boy I wanted to be with. Of course, he had a girlfriend of his own at the time, but she was out of the picture quickly enough. I lost my virginity to him- that should go without saying- and he always claimed the reverse was true as well.”

“Even though he had a girlfriend before you?” I ask.

“He was also fifteen,” Charlotte says. “His parents were dedicated church-goers, like mine. Of course, that didn’t mean that I was willing to wait for my sixteenth… The rest you already know. I’ve never looked at another man the way that I looked at Keith that summer nine- god, NINE years ago… No other man has made me feel the love I feel for Keith. Lust, on the other hand…”

“You were brought up to believe that whatever you wanted, you deserved to get,” I muse, taking care to place all the blame squarely at the feet of Charlotte’s late father.

“EXACTLY,” Charlotte says. “A mistake I DON’T intend to make with this little one!” I giggle as the smile returns to Charlotte’s face- if I’d had the upbringing she had, with all the turmoil in her family, I have no doubt I’d be much, much more messed up than she is- and I know that despite her actions last year, her infidelity, she truly is capable of learning from her mistakes.

I spend the day with Charlotte, waiting for her to ‘pop’. We go watch some of her old home movies, including some old videos of 16 year old Charlotte and Keith that bring yet more tears to Charlotte’s face. The videos that make her smile the most, however, are the most recent ones, from 2011 onwards. The videos recorded after I came into her life, after the ‘official’ formation of the Angels… And I realise that no matter what blood or the law may say, Charlotte and I truly are family. We may both be only children in the eyes of the law, but as far as we’re concerned, we may as well be twins.

It being a Saturday, the rest of our ‘extended family’ start to arrive later in the afternoon for the traditional girls’ night in. Mary and Kristina-Leigh are the first to arrive- with the Irish woman already stating that the royal princess (who was born earlier in the day) had better stay away from ‘Kristina-Leigh’s future husband’- followed by Krystie, Hannah, Viks, Nikki and her friends and the whole of Out of Heaven. Even in Charlotte’s main entertaining room, it feels somewhat crowded with sixteen girls present (seventeen if you count Kristina-Leigh), but I still manage to find a private corner of the room to talk to Nikki and Stephanie.

“Hey, you two,” I say with a smile. “Still got the warm glow inside that you only get from doing a good deed?”

“Hell yeah!” Nikki laughs. “That’s a surprise about Viks’s brother being her boyfriend, though… I’d have expected Viks to have helped Laura out, to have spoken to her before we did.”

“Don’t forget she doesn’t live with her parents anymore,” I say, making Nikki nod. “What I REALLY want to talk about is who we help next.”

“Umm, none of ‘my’ other girls have any real immediate need,” Nikki says.

“I didn’t say ‘immediately’,” I reply. “But we three… We’re in a position to do a lot of good, offer a lot of help to girls like Laura, who are having difficulty.”

“Oh my god, you actually ARE setting up a charity!” Nikki laughs. “Aren’t you going to be busy enough with Charlotte and her baby and Steph and her band?”

“It’s more of a long-term project,” I say. “Probably won’t even get it off the ground until 2017 at the earliest, I’m just brainstorming ideas right now and wanted you two to know as I’m probably going to be leaning on you both for support!”

“Dibs on a desk job, preferably in management!” Nikki laughs. “Now, if you’d excuse me, it’s Lauren’s birthday on Tuesday, obviously we won’t be able to party here due to the arrival so we’re kinda having an informal celebration now!”

“Okay, give my best to Lauren!” I laugh as Nikki leaves. “Steph, you’ve been kinda quiet, is everything okay?”

“Hmm?” The brown-haired singer says. “Oh, um, yeah, just a little tired, that’s all…”

“What do you think about the charity idea?” I ask.

“It sounds good!” Steph says with obvious forced enthusiasm. “Sounds like it could really do a lot of good work for, you know, girls like us…”

“Good,” I laugh. “As you’re going to be the big superstar I’m probably going to be calling on you a lot!” Steph giggles nervously, before we’re distracted by a loud ‘ooh’ from the other side of the room, which I quickly discover is centred on Charlotte.

“Don’t tell me you’ve FINALLY gone into labour?” I ask my BFF, who sticks her tongue out at me.

“No, but check this out!” Charlotte laughs as she holds up a tiny blue all-in-one with the word ‘cherub’ printed on the front. “Sarah got this for me- well, for Keith jnr, really!”

“So cool,” I laugh.

“And eventually, Keith jnr might actually wear it!” Krystie laughs.

“I’m only three days overdue, give me a break!” Charlotte laughs. “I ate a curry tonight and everything…”

“You KNOW she’ll go into labour in the middle of the night, right?” Mary laughs.

“Why do you think I’m drinking orange juice?” I say, prompting a mass giggle. “Anything now, Charlie? The excitement of being in a room with sixteen women not enough to entice him out?” Charlotte rolls her eyes, before laughing and shaking her head, much to the dismay of the assembled women.

“Kristina-Leigh’s gone home with her dad,” Mary laughs. “THAT’s the only woman he wants to see!” Laughter fills the room, and continues to fill the room for the rest of the evening until the party dissipates just after 10pm, Charlotte being understandably exhausted from all the excitement. I head to bed myself shortly afterward and fall into a deep sleep, even despite Stuart’s absence from my bed. I wake up just after 7am and lay awake in bed for a while, enjoying having the chance to relax. My relaxation is shattered mere minutes later, however, when Charlotte bangs hard on my bedroom door.

“What is it?” I ask, jumping out of bed.

“What do you think!?” Charlotte yells. “Now! We need to go now!” My brain races and I experience a moment of panic as I scramble through my drawers for something to wear, eventually settling on a very plain black bra and panty set and a short-sleeved blue dress.

“Hurry, hurry!” Charlotte wails. I nearly start to hyperventilate as I pull on a pair of flats, accidentally getting them on the wrong foot before eventually sorting myself. “I swear, Jamie,” my BFF continues, “if you come out of there wearing make-up…”

“I’m ready,” I say, grabbing my handbag and leading my BFF down to my car. Within thirty minutes, we’re back at hospital where Charlotte is wheeled away from me to her delivery room, leaving me alone to send off a raft of text messages- the first of which I send to Keith. Within fifteen minutes, a handsome young man arrives in the waiting area, but that man is my boyfriend, rather than Charlotte’s ex.

“Hey,” Stuart says, greeting me with a kiss. “How is she?”

“Haven’t heard,” I say. “If it was another false alarm… We’d have heard by now, surely?”

“Umm, don’t think it works that way,” Stuart says as we sit down together. “The baby will do whatever he wants…” Within minutes, we’re joined by the rest of Angels, as well as Joshua and his family, and even Ellen, who I haven’t seen myself in months. The clock ticks onward, passing 10am, and as the waiting room fills with people- and even a camera crew- one person is conspicuous by his continued absence.

“You- you did text him, right?” Hannah asks.

“He was top of the list,” I reply. “Texted him again an hour ago, still no reply… Jon, could you nip outside and call him, please?” The tall, dark-skinned man’s eyes go as wide as dinner plates as I put him on the spot, causing me to cringe a little.

“Why me!?” Jonathan asks. “You’ve known him longer than any of us…”

“He might be more willing to talk to a man,” I say, trailing off as I realise how weak my explanation is.

“I’ll call him,” Stuart says.

“Are you sure?” I ask. “You and he haven’t seen eye-to-eye since Christmas…”

“We’re hardly arch-enemies,” Stuart says. “He’ll listen to me, I know he will.”

“Okay,” I concede. “Hurry back, babe.” The room hangs in silence for two minutes before Stuart returns, shaking his head.

“…Well?” I ask.

“No answer,” Stuart sighs. “Left a voicemail. Really hope he gets here soon, I know he’d be devastated if he missed the birth…”

“It’d have killed me if I missed Kristina-Leigh’s birth,” Dan says as he cradles the still-tiny girl in his arms.

“Any kids we have, I’ll be there every second of the way,” Jonathan says to Viks, who giggles and rests her head on his shoulders. Another hour passes with no sign of Keith anywhere, and we all begin to get agitated, making plans to return later, when our group is approached by a nurse.

“Are you with Miss Hutchinson?” The nurse- a kind-looking woman in her early thirties- asks.

“Yes,” I say. “Sorry if we’re taking up too much room, she doesn’t have any family, we’re-“

“It’s quite okay,” the nurse says with a smile. “I just thought you’d like to know that Miss Hutchinson gave birth to a baby boy fifteen minutes ago, weighing 7lbs 13oz. Mother and baby are both fine, they’re getting some rest but will be able to receive some visitors in a few hours’ time.” The entire waiting room almost shakes as everyone bursts into cheers of joy and a loud round of applause.

“Please let her now that we’re thinking about her,” I say. “What time can we come back?”

“She should be okay at about 2pm,” the nurse says. “There weren’t any complications but as you can imagine, Miss Hutchinson is utterly exhausted!”

“We’ll be back at 2,” I say as the crowd slowly disperses, some going home, some- like myself and Stuart- heading to the hospital cafeteria for some lunch.

“I should call my mum, let her know everything’s okay,” I say. “It’s weird- whist it was a pregnancy, it seemed like some sort of future adventure, something to look forward to, but now it’s not a pregnancy any more, it- sorry, HE’s a baby…”

“I know what you mean,” Stuart sighs, before a sly grin creeps across his face. “You know, you look kinda cute without make-up. Like, not even remotely masculine…”

“Thanks,” I laugh. “You look cute without make-up too!” Stuart lets out a snort of laughter as he checks his phone.

“Still nothing from Keith,” Stuart sighs. “I texted him letting him know that, well, it’s ‘over’. Kinda like to think that he’s on his way…”

“Let- let’s just get something to eat,” I say. After lunch, Stuart and I head back to the waiting area, which isn’t quite as packed as before. Joshua is still present, as are Krystie and Mary, but the rest of the guys and girls have departed.

"Still not 2 o'clock yet," Krystie sighs. "Think she's still asleep."

"Has Dan gone home?" Stuart asks Mary, who nods with a tired smile.

"Kristine-Leigh was getting restless so I told him to take her home," Mary explains.

"Too many people around?" I ask.

"Are you kidding?" Mary laughs. "Only time that little diva hates there being too many people is when they aren't paying attention to her!" I giggle as I sit down next to Stuart, the five of us in the waiting room willing the clock to tick onward- and hoping for the arrival of the new father. By the time 2 o'clock rolls around there's still no sign of Keith- but as promised, the nurse we spoke to earlier returns, wearing a wide smile on her face.

"Ca- can we-" I stutter to the nurse, who simply nods, her smile getting even wider.

"Miss Hutchinson is awake," the nurse explains. "I think she'd really appreciate some company." The five of us smile as we head into the room where Charlotte is laid in bed, a tired smile on her tear-stained face- and as I catch a glimpse of the tiny bundle in her arms, tears immediately begin to flood out my eyes- making me thankful I didn't wear any mascara today.

"Oh god, Charlie..." I wail.

"Don't, you'll start me off again!" Charlotte says in a shaky voice. "Keith jnr... This your Aunt Jamie. Next to your mummy, she's the most amazing woman in the world!"

"He's so beautiful..." I whisper.

"Just like his mother!" Joshua says in the softest voice I've ever heard him use.

"I- I know there are cameras out there," Charlotte whispers. "But I- I'd just like this moment, please..."

"I'll tell them to go home immediately!" Joshua says. "This is your time, not mine."

"He's so gorgeous!" Krystie squeaks. "He's got his father's nose..."

"Where is Keith?" Charlotte asks, her face falling when we respond with frowns.

"I've called him," Stuart says. "Left a voicemail. He should be on his way here..."

"Well at least his godfathers are here," I say. "Two REAL men he can look up to... May- may I?"

"Of course," Charlotte says, gingerly handing the tiny, sleeping baby to me. "Be careful- support his neck, don't hold him too tight..."

"God, he is just beautiful, isn't he?" I whisper as I stare at the baby's cherub-like face. "Just wait until you get home, you're going to have such an amazing life with an amazing mother and the best extended family in the world! When you get older, girls are just going to THROW themselves at you..."

"Only one of whom will be allowed to have you!" Mary jokes. "How long were you in labour?"

"Three of the longest hours of my life," Charlotte sighs as I hand the baby back to her. "Thank god for the epidural..."

"THREE hours!?" Mary exclaims. "For your first child! I was in labour for fourteen!"

"Umm, sorry..." Charlotte says, before the entire room bursts into fits of giggles.

"Ah, as long as you suffer with your second, it's fine," Mary giggles, before the room is interrupted by a knock at the door, and a face that makes me gasp.

"Ke- Keith?" I whisper as I look into the terrified face of the handsome young man.

"Alright, mate?" Stuart asks. "Come on in, there's someone who wants to meet you..." Without saying a word, Keith makes his way into the room, shaking with nerves as he stares into the face of the tiny baby in Charlotte's arms.

"The- the doctors say they can do a DNA test any time," Charlotte says.

"Why bother?" Keith says, before a wide grin creeps onto his face. "I mean, just look at him, he's obviously my son!" Charlotte giggles, tears once again streaming down her face, as she hands the tiny baby to his father, who cradles him in his strong arms.

"He's amazing," Keith whispers.

"Can- can I have him back, please?" Charlotte nervously asks.

"Oh- um, of course," Keith says, handing his son back to Charlotte. "Have you settled on a name?"

"Keith Joshua Stuart Hartley," Charlotte says. "After his father and godfathers."

"'Hartley' and not 'Hutchinson'?" Keith asks.

"Even I don't want to be called 'Hutchinson'," Charlotte explains. "He's going to take after your side of the family, not mine." Keith smiles as he stares at the tiny infant, but I can't help notice a sadness in his eyes as he stares at the infant in Charlotte's arms.

After another twenty minutes, all of us- Keith included- are ushered out of the room by the midwife to allow Charlotte to get more rest. Krystie, Mary and Joshua all head home, as does Keith, much to my surprise and dismay.

"Aren't you going to stay with your son?" I ask the new father as he heads out to his car.

"I've got the rest of his life to see him," Keith explains. "And besides, Charlotte obviously doesn't want me there..."

"She obviously DOES," I retort.

"If that was the case, she'd have let me hold him for more than five seconds," Keith sighs as he walks away.

"Let him go," Stuart says, squeezing my hand for support. "If he's any kind of father, any kind of MAN, he'll be back."

"Okay," I sigh. "Just going to check my messages before I head back in."

"Okay babe," Stuart says, giving me a quick kiss before re-entering the hospital. Obviously, my phone is filled with notifications- mostly from Facebook, people asking me to pass their best wishes onto Charlotte- but I have two missed calls from home, which I immediately return.

"Hello?" Mum's voice asks as she answers the phone.

"Hi mum!" I say happily.

"Jamie!" Mum gushes. "I heard the news... How much did he weigh?"

"Seven pounds, thirteen ounces," I giggle. "Everything went smoothly, Charlotte was only in labour for three hours."

"Lucky girl," mum laughs. "Let her know we're thinking of her. We'll be round tomorrow, in the meantime, tell her to get some rest!"

"Will do," I say. "Talk to you later."

"Ooh, before I go," mum says. "I remembered your cousin's surnames- or at least your aunt's ex-husbands surname- Benson."

"Thanks!" I say.

"Are you going to look them up on Facebook?" Mum asks.

"...Maybe," I say with a smile. "Assuming I can track them down..."

"GOOD," mum laughs. "Now get back to that godson of yours!" I laugh as I end the call and head back inside with Stuart, where we once again wait to be allowed to see the new family. After a few hours- just after 6 o'clock- we're allowed back in to see Charlotte, who once again has the tiny infant in her arms.

"Hey," I whisper to the new mother. "How is he?"

"Hungry!" Charlotte laughs. "Seem to need to feed him every hour... Let me tell you, THAT is a strange experience!"

"Stuart, cover your ears!" I joke, making my boyfriend laugh in appreciation.

"Jamie..." Charlotte whispers. "Keith... I'm afraid he'll try to take him from me. That's why I asked him to give him back to me..."

"Oh, Charlie," I sigh. "You know Keith will never take your son from you. He wouldn't know what to do with him, for starters!"

"But how-" Charlotte sighs. "How will I know that he loves me?"

"Your son?" Stuart asks. "Of course he'll love you! You're MUM. You're a superhero to him!"

"It's just-" Charlotte sniffles. "I see the way Keith looked at him, he instantly knew he was his son, and it- it just hasn't even registered for me yet..."

"It will," I say, squeezing Charlotte's free hand. "I guarantee, four years from now, that boy will literally hang off you every second of every day!"

"That'll make for some interesting modelling jobs," Stuart jokes, earning himself a light, playful punch.

"I couldn't have done any of this without you two," Charlotte says. "Please tell me you're not planning on going anywhere..."

"This from the woman who, a few shorts days ago, insisted that we take a holiday?" I laugh.

"...I think I'm going to need you around a bit longer," Charlotte says with embarrassment in her voice.

"As long as you need us, we'll be there," I say. "A long time ago you called me your sister. That's never truer than today." Charlotte smiles as the tiny infant in her arms gurgles, bringing a smile to the faces of both myself and Stuart as well.

Two days ago, I welcomed Laura into an 'extended family', and today that family's got even bigger. Assuming I can track down my cousins on Facebook, it could potentially get even bigger than that- and I couldn't be happier.

For the first sixteen years of my life my family life was non-descript, with distant parents and no idea of who I was myself. Fir the next three years my family life was non-existent... Until I met the woman I truly consider my sister. Things haven't always been smooth between us, but as this week has demonstrated, she's much more my family than most of my biological relatives. And now I have a 'nephew' too, a boy I can watch grow up into a young man... Or, if he chooses, a young woman. I know Charlotte, for all her initial misgivings, will love the child more than anything in the world, and the child will grow to love her equally as much.

...And yet, as Charlotte and Keith junior arrive home the following day, I can't help but feel sorry for the tiny boy- his father is nowhere to be seen, and his mother is still clearly suffering from turbulent emotions. However, this isn't the same Charlotte I first met four years ago. Despite her celebrity, there is very little press coverage of the birth- the royal princess is the only new-born the media seemingly care about, and that seems to suit Charlotte fine. The 19 year old Charlotte would never have ordered away a camera that was trying to film her the way Charlotte did immediately after Keith junior was born, and it's clear that she'd have preferred it if the cameras that did show up to welcome her home hadn't been there. Charlotte may be struggling with her emotions concerning herself, but her feelings toward her son are without question- as are my feelings toward the young boy.

Ten months ago, when I held Mary's new-born in my arms, it was the first time I had ever held a baby, and now it feels almost second nature to me. Stuart is, of course, wonderful with his new godson, and once again I find myself wondering what life would be like with a child of my own.

For now, however, I'm content to fulfil the role of 'World's Best Auntie'. After I help Charlotte put Keith junior to bed, though, I snuggle down on the sofa with Stuart and clear all the holiday websites from my iPad, replacing them with one simple Googled question: 'can a transgendered couple adopt a child?'

And the answer, much to my surprise and delight, is 'yes'.