Debriefings 19

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Debriefings
by
The Rev. Anam Chara✠

Along life’s journey we each encounter those events where all that we know, all that we do, and all that we are may change. But even as we approach such events, we don’t always notice their markers until we look behind us and see them for what they were.

One boy is about to learn that he has already passed such an event, and nothing will ever be quite the same…

XIX

“So, have you made up your mind about joining the cheer team?” Sheila asked her brother as they approached Jenny’s house. “I brought along my old practice uniform in case you need it today.”

Brandon noticed that his sister carried an athletic bag with her. It likely contained the clothes that she’d mentioned. If he did decide to go through with it, he’d need to start that afternoon. “No, I haven’t decided yet,” he told her. “But thanks for bringing the uniform. I might need it after all.”

“You can, like, put it in your locker so it’ll be there if you do.”

“Good morning, Brandon, Sheila!” Jenny greeted her boyfriend and his sister as she met them at the end of the path in front of her house.

“Good morning, Jenny!” Brandon returned the greeting. Then he raised his voice to address her mother. “Good morning, Mis’ess Chang!”

“Good morning to you, Brandon!” Mrs. Chang greeted her daughter’s new boyfriend. “You come for dinner tomorrow evening?”

“Yes, ma’am,” confirmed the boy. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“Did Jennifer tell you that we are Buddhist and follow a vegetarian diet?”

“Yes, she did, Mis’ess Chang,” he answered. “And that’s not a problem for me. I always like to try new cuisines.”

Mrs. Chang smiled back. “We certainly don’t wish to disappoint you.”

“Little likelihood of that, ma’am,” Brandon assured her. “I’m happy for the chance simply to meet Jenny’s family.” He glanced over to his girlfriend and she grinned back to him.

“Mom, we really should go before we’re tardy for homeroom,” interrupted Jenny.

“Alright, Jennifer,” her mother conceded. “You can go now!” She waved the threesome along. Jenny, Brandon, and Sheila passed a large oak tree that shielded them from Mrs. Chang’s view. So Brandon and Jenny kissed before continuing on their way, holding hands, while Sheila walked alongside her brother.

“What have you decided?” Jenny asked him.

“I don’t really know yet,” he admitted. “I had almost decided to do it, but I got a call from Jeff later in the evening. He asked me not to.”

“He seemed to be, like, uncomfortable with you doing it at lunch yesterday,” remarked Sheila.

“Yes,” agreed Jenny. “I would’ve thought your best friend would be more supportive.”

“Well, he’s afraid everyone will think I’m gay and he and Mark along with me,” explained Brandon.

“Even with you and Jenny going together?” Sheila tried to assure her brother. “Or Mark and Melinda? How could anyone, like, think you’re gay?”

“Showing up at school dressed like a girl two or three times a week would prob’ly do it,” quipped Brandon, smirking.

“But I checked the stats on it,” objected Jenny. “Most crossdressers are actually straight and gays don’t even crossdress more than straight guys do. Besides, you wouldn’t really be crossdressing, anyway—just wearing the uniform of your team!”

“You know that and I know that,” he retorted. “But does everyone else know that? And if even if they do, would they, like, care? Bullies don’t really wait to get their facts straight.”

“I hadn’t thought about that,” admitted Jenny. “I guess they’re, like, looking for an excuse to cause trouble.”

“Something like that,” conceded Brandon.

“I’m hoping you won’t let the bullies scare you away from cheerleading, Brandon,” said Sheila, “or the divas, either. The team really needs you.”

“I’m still upset about what Jeff said, though,” Brandon reminded the girls.

“And I still say your best friend should support you,” Jenny reminded him. “That’s what friends do.”

“But how can I expect Jeff not to give into his fears when I’m afraid, myself?” Brandon remarked. “Besides, sometimes, a friend has to tell you when you’re making a mistake.”

“Brandon, do you think joining the cheer team would be a mistake for you?” Sheila asked him.

“I don’t know,” he answered. “It could be a mistake, but then again, not doing it could be a mistake, too. If I were sure, deciding would be easy.”

☆ ☆ ☆

Sheila up-ended the cheerleading bag in her brother’s locker. “It’s there now if you need it,” she said. “I hope your day goes well, no matter what you decide.” She kissed Brandon on the cheek.

“Thank you for helping me out, Sis,” he offered. “I’m still not sure what I’ll do until I see Miss San-Giacomo.”

“Then no one can ever say my little brother rushes into a decision,” said Sheila. He flashed a demure grin at his sister. If she only knew! In his own mind, he’d hardly had time to consider completely the possible consequences of his decision. He hated to make any decision without full knowledge of the possible outcomes and the likelihood of each occurrence. But this hadn’t been done before—not at West Grove High School, anyway. There was no prior experience to measure.

“You have a good day, Sis!” Brandon wished her.

“You, too, Li’l Bro, Jenny!” Sheila returned his closing salutation before swinging off to her classes.

“Have a nice day!” Jenny wished Sheila on her way, then looking Brandon right in the eye, asked, “Any decision yet?”

“I’m still fighting with myself over it.”

“Remember, I’ll support whatever you decide.”

“Thanks, Jenny,” he proffered. “I wish I could be as sure of others as I am of you. I wish I were that sure of myself.” Brandon took the books for his German and Earth Science courses from his locker, before closing it. Then when he shut the door, he saw Jeff turn the corner and come toward him. But when Jeff saw Brandon, he quite suddenly turned around to go back the way he came, then disappeared behind the corner.

Seeing the sudden change in her boyfriend’s demeanor, Jenny took Brandon by the hand. “Don’t forget, you have my support as well as others’.”

“I know, but Jeff’s my oldest friend,” he lamented. “I’m afraid of losing his support most of all.”

“Let’s go,” she told him, gently squeezing his hand and pulling him in the opposite direction to where Jeff had gone. “We don’t wanna be tardy.”

☆ ☆ ☆

When Brandon arrived at his homeroom, Mr. Markham and Kelly were standing outside the door, waiting for him. Kelly was wearing her cheerleading uniform, which seemed slightly unusual to Brandon. As a rule, the cheerleaders wore their uniforms to school only those days when they’d be cheering at a game. So he figured it might be a less-than-subtle attempt to influence his decision. But Jeff’s attempt to influence him had also lacked subtlety.

“Good morning, Mister MacDonald,” Ernest Markham addressed him. “This is the second day running that I’ve received a message to send you and Miss Harrigan to Doctor Van de Meer’s office during homeroom. Now, could either one of you tell me what’s going on?”

Brandon as well as Kelly considered their homeroom teacher’s request for a brief moment. Kelly spoke first. “After Double Abby was injured at the Homecoming game, we couldn’t find another girl to fill in for her on the cheer team,” said the cheerleader. “So I suggested Brandon.”

“Yesterday, Miss San-Giacomo asked me to consider it,” Brandon followed up. “I promised her my answer this morning. I guess Kelly’s coming along to help with any questions?”

“I dunno,” denied Kelly. “I didn’t expect, like, to be involved this morning.”

“So Brandon’s been asked to be a cheerleader?” their teacher asked in clarification.

“That’s right,” answered Brandon. Kelly nodded in affirmation.

“What have you decided?” Mr. Markham inquired.

“Sorry, sir, but I think I should give Miss San-Giacomo my answer first,” answered the boy, unwilling to admit that he was still in the throes of indecision. “After all, she has the most riding on it.”

“Yes, Mister Markham, she does” agreed Kelly. “If Brandon accepts, then we only have to teach him, like, what we’re already doing. Else, we have to rework, like, all of our pyramids, most of our gymnastics, many of our routines, and much of our choreography in a very short time.”

“Then telling Miss San-Giacomo first is probably fair,” conceded their teacher. “But then why not in her office instead of Doctor Van de Meer’s?”

“’Coz if he says yes, then Brandon will need a schedule change,” explained Kelly. “Doctor Van de Meer can set it up, like, right there. But Doctor Lansing has to approve it, too.”

“And if you go along with this, Brandon, what kind of uniform will you wear,” asked Mr. Markham. The boy remained silent, but his face answered by blushing.

“He’d wear the same uniform like the other cheerleaders,” replied Kelly for her tongue-tied friend. “Just like mine,” she emphasized, lifting a pleat of her skirt with thumb and forefinger and daintily courtseying to their teacher.

“With the skirt?” Mr. Markham asked.

“With the skirt!” confirmed the cheerleader, giggling and grinning mischievously at both Brandon and their teacher.

“Brandon, are you sure you know what you’re doing?” Mr. Markham probed, looking him right in the eye. “If you go along with this, or anything else like it, you may draw attention from bullies.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time,” said Brandon. “And I do know how to take care of myself.”

“Well, be certain to make the right decision for yourself,” the teacher advised, “whatever that may be. Anyway, you two need hall passes.” He retreated into the room to get them.

Meanwhile, Kelly was upset with the teacher’s advice to Brandon. She’d worked hard to bring her friend on board but Mr. Markham seemed to be discouraging him. Yet circumstances would still allow her to have the final word between them on the matter; she and Brandon would be going to see Doctor Van de Meer together.

Then Kelly and Brandon noticed someone walking toward them, wearing a muted blue dress, a pair of navy pumps with matching handbag, and a blue hair ribbon tied in a bow over the right ear. Kelly initially thought the dress ill-fitting, but on closer examination saw that it was the right size although worn incorrectly. And the wearer seemed to have problems walking in the pumps, even though they had only two-inch (5 cm) heels.

“Billy?” Kelly asked the approaching person. “Is that you?”

“Yeah,” he answered in a subdued tone. “It’s me.”

“I heard what happened,” continued Kelly. “You really hafta dress like this until the end of the semester?”

“Yeah, I do,” confirmed Billy. “But it was either this or get kicked outta school. Kinda sucks, though.”

Kelly reached out to hug him with her right arm, pulled him closer, then kissed him on the cheek. “Well, I think you’re brave to go through with it!” Kelly encouraged him, glancing out her eye toward Brandon, hoping that he’d understand that the message was intended for his benefit as well as Billy’s.

“But I must look like a freak!” Billy complained.

“No, you don’t!” Kelly contradicted him. “Your dress and makeup look fine. You do need to work on, like, how you move, though. What do you think, Brandon?”

“Huh? Am I supposed to know?” Brandon objected. “I’m hardly an expert on girlish behavior.”

“But you do pay attention to us,” said Kelly. “I think you understand girls, like, more than you let on.”

“Really?” Brandon asked.

“Really!” Kelly affirmed.

“But I don’t know what to say about Billy, except that he doesn’t quite move like a girl. He doesn’t walk at all like a girl. On the other hand, though, his gestures look almost feminine. But he needs to talk more to give his gestures a chance to match his speech.”

“That’s what I was hoping for, Brandon,” approved Kelly. “Billy, Brandon noticed, like, the same things I did. If you can learn to move better, you’ll look more like a real girl than a boy in a dress.”

“Maybe, but I’m gonna get so much crap just as soon as I go in there,” complained Billy.

“Take my seat today, Billy, next to Alice,” suggested Brandon. “She’ll be cool with it.”

“That’s right! Alice is cool with all kinds of things,” added Kelly. “So you won’t be alone, a few of us are willing to help you through this. Besides, I kinda like boys wearing dresses.” Mischievously, she glanced at Brandon again. Billy wondered, what was up?

Just then, Mr. Markham appeared in the doorway again. “Hall passes for you two,” he announced, handing the transparent, plastic-covered tags to Kelly and Brandon, who immediately clipped them to their identification badges. “And is that you, Billy? Why the dress today?”

“Yeah, it’s me,” the crossdressed student replied. “And I guess you haven’t read your email today?”

“No, not yet,” admitted the teacher. “I usually catch up with it during homeroom.”

“Then you’ll find out why in one from Doctor Lansing.”

Mr. Markham raised an eyebrow and looked at Kelly and Brandon. “You guys get to Doctor Van de Meer’s office now while I discuss this with Billy.”

“Okay!” Kelly answered as she spun around and grabbed Brandon’s right wrist.

“Wait!” Brandon called as he broke free of the impetuous girl’s grip. “Mister Markham, please let Billy use my seat today. Alice will be supportive of him.”

With that, Kelly grabbed his left wrist to drag him along. Although Brandon was about to walk with her, she quickly began to scamper down the hallway, towing him behind.

“So, what’s happened, Billy?” Mr. Markham resumed his questioning.

“The principal caught me coming out of the Ladies’ Room and not wearing my badge. In the confusion to find it, I caught a heel in the strap of my backpack, tripped, and everything in my purse went out in the floor. Doctor Lansing saw my marijuana pipe and I was in trouble. She gave me and Mom a choice of me getting kicked out of school or dressing like a girl the rest of the semester.”

Ernest Markham chuckled just a little then admitted, “So, your predicament is at least in part my fault, huh?”

“How?”

“Well, I challenged you to make up Gender-Bender Day.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t tell me to carry a piece in my purse or to go into the Ladies’ Room. And I’m the one who forgot to wear my badge into the building. Besides, if I hadn’t been dressed like this, Doctor Lansing might not’ve thought of it as an alternative punishment and just expelled me instead.”

“So, I guess it could’ve been worse?”

“Coulda, woulda, shoulda,” answered Billy. “The hardest part is I don’t know if I can ever live it down.”

“Billy,” Mr. Markham addressed him, “you will get through this okay, and after you do, you’ll be able to deal with just about anything. Now, let’s get to class!”

☆ ☆ ☆

Marla Peterson greeted Brandon and Kelly as they entered the Guidance Office. “Good morning,” she said smiling. “Go right in. Doctor Van de Meer’s expecting you.”

“Good morning, Mis’ Peterson!” Kelly chirped, returning her own beaming smile.

“Good morning to you, too,” offered Brandon, although looking rather sullen, his decision still weighing on his mind. He and Kelly found Dr. Van de Meer’s office door open and the counselor beckoned them to enter as she viewed his class schedule on her desktop monitor. Brandon was surprised, but relieved, to see Jenny there sitting on the sofa, waiting for him. He took a seat next to his girlfriend while Kelly sat down in the armchair. “I’m afraid of this,” he whispered to Jenny. “But I have to do it.” Perceptible only to him, she subtly nodded her support and approval, so he smiled his thanks to her.

However, the cheer coach was conspicuous by her absence. “Where’s Miss San-Giacomo?” Brandon inquired.

“She’s on her way but has to stop by the main office for a few forms,” replied Dr. Van de Meer. “If you do join the cheerleading squad, there’s paperwork to fill out.”

“There’s always paperwork to fill out,” remarked Kelly.

“It’s just part of the world in which we live,” observed their counselor, jotting down on a notepad the code that she’d need to enter if Brandon decided to join the cheer team. “Learning to deal with it is one of the many lessons not listed in the curriculum that you still have to learn in school.”

“Did I just hear my name mentioned?” Coach San-Giacomo asked, suddenly appearing in the doorway and clutching a manila folder.

“Brandon wondered where you were,” confirmed Dr. Van de Meer amusingly. “I warned him that he’d need to complete paperwork to become a cheerleader.”

“Oh, Xee! Surely you didn’t!” Coach Brenda teased her colleague. “I hope that’s not a deal-breaker.” Then she looked directly at the boy. “Do you have a decision for me, Brandon?”

“Yes—I mean, yes, I have a decision—I mean, yes, I’ll do it,” he responded anxiously as Jenny squeezed his hand and Kelly squealed while dancing a happy dance right in her seat. “I want to do this” he continued. “In fact, I think I have to.”

“Have to?” Coach San-Giacomo asked, raising an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“If I don’t, then I’ll always wonder if I could’ve,” explained Brandon. “And I need to find out just how androgynous I really am. I can’t think of a better way to do it than with the cheer team. Besides, the team needs me. If I don’t, I’d be letting everyone down.”

“No, Brandon,” the coach disagreed. “Even though we do need you, you wouldn’t be letting anyone down. Don’t give yourself a guilt trip like that. I do have one question for you, though.”

“What’s that?”

“Are you going to be alright with wearing the uniform—a girl’s uniform?”

“Yeah, I think so,” conceded Brandon although quite courageously hiding his anxiety. Then he smiled. “It comes with being one of the team. Besides, as it happens, my dad was a Powder Puff Cheerleader in high school, so I guess it’s alright for me to do it, too.”

“Brandon, Power Puff tournaments usually are just for a week,” the guidance counselor pointed out. “This is not Powder Puff. You’d be in this for the long haul.”

“I know, Doctor Van de Meer,” he said. “What I mean is that I feel more comfortable with it knowing Dad’s done something similar and for my family to be behind me helps.”

Xenia smiled when she heard Brandon’s explanation and leaned back in her chair. “So your parents are alright with you becoming a cheerleader?”

“They are, and my sister all but begged me to do it.”

“Sheila?” Coach Brenda asked. “Why doesn’t she wanna come back? I did ask her Friday night at the hospital.”

Brandon wondered if he ought to disclose any of what his sister had told him, especially her warning about Tillie and Penney. But instead, he sought to give a more positive response. “Sis says she’s happy on the Dance Team-Pompom Squad and is already committed to it for this year. She doesn’t think it would be fair to leave them now.”

“I guess she’s right about that,” Miss San-Giacomo conceded. “You can still get help from her if you need it, though. She is your sister after all and a very good cheerleader. I so hoped she’d continue on the team this year. Anyway, are you ready to begin training this afternoon? I hope we’re not expecting too much.”

“That’s alright,” he assured the coach. “Sheila’s loaned me her old practice uniform to use today.”

“But does it fit?” Kelly asked.

“I guess we’ll find out,” Brandon dismissed the inquiry.

“Remember, everyone,” interjected Jenny, grinning and squeezing his hand. “He became a very cute girl a week ago.”

“We’ve all seen the video, Brandon,” Dr. Van de Meer followed up Jenny’s remark. “You really pulled it off!”

“So I’ve been told.”

“But you should be proud of it, Brandon,” declared Kelly.

“Doctor Van de Meer, should I take pride in something that got me in trouble?” Brandon inquired. “Somehow, that doesn’t make sense to me.”

“That’s an interesting question to pose,” remarked Dr. Van de Meer. “But are you indeed asking a question or is it rhetorical?”

“I think Brandon just wants to tell us, like, he’s already taking a big risk,” said Jenny. “So that’s a rhetorical question, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it is,” confirmed the counselor. “But are you really sure about this, Brandon?”

“Am I sure? No! I can’t be. I had only twenty-four hours to gather information and think about it. I can only decide with what I could do in twenty-four hours. Would more time change it? I don’t know that, either.”

Dr. Van de Meer thought about Brandon’s response for a moment. The boy had disclosed his thinking in complete honesty. They had given him a time limit for an answer and he had returned with a decision within that allotted time. Still, the counselor herself worried about a possible deficit in his thinking. If he indeed had Asperger’s syndrome, then had he thoroughly considered his peers’ possible reactions? Yes, he had identified possible bullying, but could he appreciate the broader spectrum of possible consequences, less extreme, yet no less disapproving. Was Brandon bravely dismissive of such problems, or was he blissfully unaware? With Asperger’s syndrome, he might not’ve even considered the social consequences looming over the horizon. But that was merely speculation that could help neither Brandon nor anyone else at the moment.

“Then are you satisfied with your decision?” Dr. Van de Meer asked Brandon. “Are you willing to stand by it?”

“Yes,” replied Brandon. “It’s what I want and the best decision I can make with what I know right now.”

“Then no benefit will be had from further discussion,” announced Dr. Van de Meer as she changed the course code for Boys’ Physical Education to Cheerleading One on Brandon’s class schedule. “We should adjourn our little meeting and I’ll get started on cutting through the tangle of red tape at my end. Brenda, do you have anything more you need to do?”

“My paperwork is done, Doctor Van de Meer,” the coach clarified. “All that remains on my end is for Brandon and his parents to complete and sign these forms.” She handed him the manila folder.

“Does anyone need anything else?” Dr. Van de Meer asked as she input her personal confirmation code and sent through the request for Brandon’s schedule change, then closed his record in the database. Now the system needed only Dr. Lansing’s personal approval code to confirm it.

“Hall passes for us to get to class,” noted Kelly. The counselor opened the top right-hand drawer of her desk and withdrew passes for the three students, which she handed them.

“I also need to stop by Nurse Mansour’s office,” said Brandon. “She has my pills.”

Dr. Van de Meer nodded and scribbled a note on a small form which she tore from the top of a pad then gave to Brandon. Next, Miss San-Giacomo spoke to him. “Thanks for agreeing to help us,” she said. “Do look over those forms so you can ask me any questions you might have about them in class this afternoon. I look forward to seeing you there.”

“Me, too,” concurred Brandon smiling. I just hope it all works out.”

“We all do, Brandon!” Kelly asserted on behalf of Coach Brenda, the other cheerleaders, and herself. “We all have a lot at stake in your success.” She got up from the armchair and clipped the hall pass to her badge’s lanyard. She, Brandon, and Jenny all filed out the door. The coach started to leave as well, but the counselor stopped her.

“Wait a moment, Brenda.”

“What is it, Xee?”

“Let’s go tell Seph about Brandon’s decision right now,” said Xenia. “If she’s gonna shoot this down, I want her to do it now. She’ll have a harder time rejecting it, though, if we’re there in person.”

Brenda nodded in agreement with her. “She did emphasize that his decision had to be respected, though, so I do think she’ll let him do it.”

“You seem much more optimistic now than you were yesterday.”

“I didn’t think he’d be receptive to it yesterday, Xee.”

“I’m not surprised that he agreed to it, but his reasoning was more mature than I expected. Two weeks ago, I really don’t think he would’ve gone along with it.”

☆ ☆ ☆

“Jenny, I don’t know how long I’ll be with Nurse Mansour, so you should get to your Latin class now,” advised Brandon. “After all, I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.”

Quickly glancing around to confirm that they were indeed alone, the young couple kissed with a tenderness appropriate to their young passion. Then Jenny rushed to the nearest staircase, smiling all the way. Brandon knocked on the door of the Infirmary and it opened.

“Oh hello there, Brandon! How can I help you?” Nurse Mansour asked.

“Sorry to bother you with it again today, but I think I need my pill.”

“It’s no bother at all, Brandon,” she assured him. “It’s what I do, after all. Your alprazolam is prescribed for you to take ‘as needed,’ so you have to come in for it.”

“I think it would be so much easier if I could just carry it myself to take when I need it.”

“Well, there’s a good reason we don’t let you do that.”

“Why?”

“Because before that became the policy, druggies and sometimes bullies would watch for a student who took medication and find out what kind. Then they’d steal it, sometimes beating the student up for it. Then they’d sell it on the street or take it themselves. Some students even sold their own meds. Legal drugs like risperidone, alprazolam, methylphenidate, and SSRIs were being sold illegally. Prescription-strength codeine and pain-killers were also popular and especially birth-control pills.

“The school board wanted its ‘zero-tolerance’ anti-drug policy to ban even prescription drugs, but sometimes a student, like you, really needs medication. So, they agreed on the current rule, that all students’ prescription drugs should be kept by the School Nurse to be dispensed as prescribed.”

“That sounds reasonable to me,” concurred Brandon.

“Not only did it help curb prescription drug abuse, the policy has other advantages, like we can help monitor students’ compliance with treatment and even remind them to refill their prescriptions and things like that.”

“Did you call Doctor Windham yesterday?”

“I did, and she emphasized that she sees you as responsible enough to know when you need to take an alprazolam,” the nurse disclosed. “So when you ask, I’ll assume you must need it unless I see signs to the contrary.”

“Like what?”

“If I notice side effects or your behavior is unusual,” she explained. “And if you request a second dose I will question you about it briefly.”

“That makes sense,” agreed Brandon. He felt pleased by what Dr. Windham had told Nurse Mansour and resolved once again to continue responsible use of alprazolam, which was, after all, a much abused drug. “But can I get it now?”

“Of course,” the nurse told him as she stretched the key for a secure cabinet out on a lanyard. She punched a tablet out of the blister pack and dropped it into a tiny paper cup. Brandon had already filled a larger paper cup from the water cooler in the Infirmary while Nurse Mansour went for his pill. He noted that she re-locked the cabinet before handing him his pill. “Here ya go!”

After Brandon swallowed the pill and washed it down, the nurse asked him, “Will you be okay, now?”

“I think so.”

“Get to class then,” urged Nurse Mansour, flashing a quick smile.

☆ ☆ ☆

Putting on her earphones, Alice Johansson noted that her desk partner was tardy again. Brandon had been neither tardy nor absent before Friday. She liked him for a desk partner as he was attentive and considerate as well as actually interested in learning German, even if his usual reliability had been interrupted lately. More than that, he always held up his end of joint assignments, unlike other partners she’d had in other courses who often were just tagging along as “free riders,” hoping to receive higher grades by merely having their names on the same work with her. No, Brandon wasn’t like that. He did his own work, then sought to relate it to hers.

Still, she wondered why Brandon had not been in homeroom that morning. An anxiously crossdressed Billy Danziger had occupied Brandon’s usual seat. Then as Alice toggled the switch to turn on her lab console, she remembered that Brandon needed to give Miss San-Giacomo his decision whether to join the cheerleading team. She wondered what the German word for cheerleader would be, but could not find it in the English-German section of her dictionary. She pressed a button on the console.

„Bitte, Frau Becker!“ Alice addressed her teacher. „Wie sagt man ‚cheerleader‘ auf Deutsch?“

Frau Becker had to pause for a moment since the usage was not straightforward. She decided to answer in English because the explanation in German might be beyond a first-year student’s ability to follow.

“The answer may surprise you, Fräulein Johanson,” she warned. “The German term is der Anfeuerer or die Anfeuererin from the verb anfeuern, literally meaning ‘to fire up.’ But in current usage the native German words have mostly been replaced by der Cheerleader or die Cheerleaderin. For the verbal noun, das Cheerleading is also preferred to das Anfeuern. ‘The cheer squad’ is die Cheerleading-Gruppe.”

“So German uses the English words instead of its own?”

“Yes. To us Germans, cheerleading is an American or British activity, so we adopted the English terminology along with the sport.”

“That sounds logical enough,” Alice accepted Frau Becker’s answer as a knock was heard at the classroom door. So the teacher opened it to see Brandon standing there with a hall pass clipped to his ID lanyard and a couple of errand permits stuck to it.

„Guten Morgen, Frau Becker!“ he greeted his teacher and then apologized: „Es tut mir leid, dass ich langsam heute bin, aber ich vom Fräulein Mansour jetzt gekommen habe“.

„Nein, Brandon! Man muss sagen: ‚…aber ich bin jetzt vom Fräulein Mansour gekommen‘ “.

„Ja, ich bin jetzt vom Fräulein Mansour gekommen“.

„Bist du krank, Brandon?“

„Nein, aber ich musste mein Medikament haben“, he explained. Then Brandon asked an unrelated question: „Wie sagt man ‚cheerleader‘ auf Deutsch?“

„Nochmal?“ exclaimed Frau Becker. “Exactly what’s going on here today?” she muttered to herself. „Geh und frag Fräulein Johansson!“ The teacher had to concentrate to suppress her laughter at the seemingly unrelated and absurd occurrence of the same question from two students.

However, Brandon was puzzled by his teacher’s reaction, telling him to go ask Alice. But then she must know. She smiled as he approached their desk.

„Guten Morgen!“ Alice greeted him. „Wie geht’s?“

„’S geht mir sehr gut! Und dir?“ he said as he sat down and began to put on his earphones.

„Auch mir gut“. But before Brandon could say anything else, Alice decided to have some fun with him, but waited until he had his earphones on and working. „Hast du der Anfeuerngruppe beigetreten?“

“Huh?”

„Hast du der Cheerleading-Gruppe beigetreten?“

“I heard ‘cheerleading’ in there somewhere, but I still don’t follow you.”

“You missed some new vocabulary, Brandon,” Alice informed him. “The verb beitreten, meaning ‘to join.’

„Hast du der Cheerleading-Gruppe beigetreten?“ she repeated.

„Alice, Brandon, herhören!“ Frau Becker interrupted their conversation over the communications network. “You must use sein with beitreten in the perfect tense.”

„Ja, Frau Becker!“ she acknowledged. „Brandon, bist du der Cheerleading-Gruppe beigetreten?“

„Ja, aber ich kann heute sehr gut auf Deutsch nicht denken“, he answered.

“Oh no, Brandon!” exclaimed Alice, shaking her head, and then teasing him, “You haven’t been a cheerleader for an hour yet and your intelligence has already dropped like ten points!”

“Stanford-Binet or Wechsler?” Brandon retorted. They both sputtered into giggles, as did Frau Becker, who was still listening to their conversation.

☆ ☆ ☆

Mark and Melinda were already seated at their usual table when Brandon and Jenny moved to join them. “Where’s Jeff?” Brandon inquired.

“Jeff said he wasn’t coming to lunch today,” replied Mark.

“Did he say why?”

“No,” said Mark before biting into his sandwich. “But he looked kinda bummed out.” Brandon’s heart sank. He felt guilty that he had disappointed and upset his friend. Jeff had always eaten lunch with Mark and Brandon since—since a long time ago.

“I think it’s my fault, Mark,” confessed Brandon. “He was really upset yesterday about me considering the cheer team. He even called me later in the evening to ask me not to do it.”

“Well,” Mark decided to ask him, “are you?”

“Yeah,” replied Brandon. “I gave Miss San-Giacomo my answer this morning. I actually transfer to Cheerleading One this afternoon.”

“Congratulations!” offered Melinda. “So you’re actually gonna do it? Show up at school in a cute little skirt and everything?”

“Yep!” Brandon affirmed. “Gonna do it!”

“You got balls!” Melinda exclaimed.

“But he’ll hafta learn to tuck ’em away!” Kelly added, suddenly arriving and taking a seat. The girls at the table giggled. “I managed to download this from the Internet,” she continued, handing him a printed document. “It’s a skill that you might, like, wanna learn now.”

Brandon accepted the document from her and perused it, his face reddening when he realized what it was, especially as the inside pages were anatomically correct. Jenny saw it, too, feeling both shocked and amused by it. She held a hand over her grin in a vain attempt to stifle her giggling. Melinda, however, simply squealed quite loudly with laughter approaching a full guffaw. Still, Brandon’s reaction quickly changed from embarrassed to curious as he studied the paper he’d received from Kelly.

“Will this ‘tucking’ really work?” he inquired of her, seeking an objective response.

“I would, like, think so,” answered Kelly. “I downloaded it from a website for crossdressers. There’s a lot on there, like techniques for makeup, hair styling, learning feminine speech and gestures, proper movement, and so on. Even videos about walking in heels.”

“That might be a useful website for you to visit,” noted Jenny, “since you’re committed to cheerleading now.”

“I think you’re right, Jenny,” agreed Brandon. “Kelly, what’s the homepage for this website?”

Kelly took the printout back from him and a yellow highlighter from her purse and marked a URL (universal resource locator) in a corner of the last page. “Try there first,” she said. “It’s an index of what’s on the website. Y’know, until I found this, I had no idea, like, how many boys want to dress like girls. It’s kinda mind-blowing, really.” She handed the document back to Brandon. “Don’t try to access the website from school, though,” she warned him. “It’s, like, blocked for sexual content. I had to download it at home.”

Brandon noted the website’s URL and handed the document to Jenny, who examined it more closely. “Do you really wanna do this? ” she asked. I’d think that’d hurt.”

“I won’t know until I try it, will I?” said Brandon. “You wanna give it a try, Mark?” Brandon held the document out to his buddy, who took it and looked through it, noting especially the diagrams.

“Yeow!” exclaimed Mark. “Ya gotta be kidding! Doing that to your balls? No way! ” Laughing and giggling answered his outburst.

“Not even for me?” Melinda pretended to pout. Even more laughter and giggles followed. “Just think of all that we girls do to look pretty for you boys! It’s not fair that you won’t endure, like, just a little something?”

“A flat front is not something most girls wanna see on a guy,” objected Mark. “In fact, most girls want it to look bigger.”

“That’s only ’coz we know they’re small, anyway!” Kelly interjected. “So you stuff your pants.”

“Kinda like how you girls pad your bras?” Mark retorted. Kelly now feigned umbrage at his remark.

“Wait a minute! I don’t quite get it,” Brandon stopped the discussion. “I understand why I would pad a bra, since I don’t have breasts, but why would a girl pad hers?”

“The same reason you’d pad your trousers,” said Melinda.

“But I don’t pad my trousers,” Brandon contradicted her. “I didn’t know I could—or should.”

Jenny hooked an arm through Brandon’s. “That’s because you don’t need to,” she told him. “I like you just the way you are.”

“Well, thanks,” he replied. “But why do it, though?”

“So your ‘package’ looks bigger than it really is,” explained Mark. “Girls like guys with a bigger ‘package.’”

“They do?” Brandon asked innocently, not yet understanding his buddy’s turn of phrase.

“And girls pad their bras because us guys like bigger boobs,” continued Mark.

“We do?” Brandon seemed definitely confused about it all. “I just don’t get that.”

Jenny looked her boyfriend in the eye. “That’s one of the reasons I like you, Brandon,” she assured him. “You seem to remain blissfully unaware of things that don’t really matter. Many girls pad their bras to pretend to have larger breasts. But I’m not interested in a guy who’d choose a girlfriend for her cup size.”

“You mean a guy would do that?” he wondered.

“All the time,” remarked Kelly. “So we girls tend to be just a little sensitive about the size of our boobs.” While the discussion had continued, she was somewhat surprised that Brandon seemed completely innocent with regard to the burgeoning sexuality voiced among the group. But then again, she remembered that he’d always been like that, seeming a year or two behind everyone else in grasping boy-girl interactions. That Jenny had admitted needing to take the initiative with Brandon had bothered Kelly. Despite his prodigious intelligence, she knew that something was wrong with her long-time friend. But was it her place to say or do anything?

“I didn’t know that,” admitted Brandon.

About then, Sheila and Alice approached the table from different directions, but arrived together.

“Hi, everybody!” proclaimed Sheila.

“Hello all!” Alice added. “Everyone having a good day?” The others in the group answered cheerfully in the affirmative while she and Sheila sat down with their lunches.

“What’s the topic?” Sheila inquired of the assembly, but before anyone could answer, she stopped them. “Wait! Brandon, what did you decide?”

“I told Miss San-Giacomo that I’d do it,” answered her brother. “I’m a cheerleader now.”

“Yes!” Kelly excitedly supported him. “Brandi’s coming back!”

Continuandum…

©2015 by the Rev. Anam Chara✠

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Comments

Brandon makes his own decision...

This is a good chapter,showing Brandon thinking through things on his own. It appears to be a constructive step forward. His being clueless on other things gives one pause to consider the possibilities of why.

Jessie C

Jessica E. Connors

Jessica Connors

Difference in approach by Kelly and Jenny

This chapter really called my attention to the differences in their approach to Brandon by Kelly and Jenny. Even more so, given the fact that Brandon has some sort of Asperger's to contend with.

Kelly seems rather pushy, and everything seems to revolve around her and her interests. And she seems rather oblivious to the reaction and feelings of others to her "crusades".

OTOH Jenny seems to support those around her, helping them to develop to their full potential. She seems very atuned to the emotions of others.

In the case of Brandon, Jenny's approach is much more successfull. Since, as we learn in this chapter, Brandon's decision process is very deliberate and needs time to work through all the what-if's. And Kelly seems to be completely unaware of the need to state her case and then backing off to give Brandon the time and space to work through the whole decision tree in his mind. Though once Brandon makes a decision, he seems to stick with it.

I see my own natural behaviour reflected in Kelly, though I have been working for years now to Jenny's behaviour.

Jessica

Maybe Brandon is considered

Maybe Brandon is considered 'clueless' regarding sexual talk as is being bandied around the table, and then again. maybe he just doesn't care one way or another? Either way, he is a very nice guy and I can certainly see why Kelly likes him so. He also appears to be a person who does not want to ever hurt someone else, but is willing to stand up for what he believes or to help and/or defend another.

his autism is really showing

as if dressing like a girl wouldnt be tough enough ...

DogSig.png

Great story and looking

Great story and looking forward to the future.
Your tale continues its delightfully subtle meandering towards????????. Yes I will have to wait and see.
Thanks Rev.
Alexi

Alexinu

very happy to see

A new update for this exceptional story

Goddess Bless you

Love Desiree

What a great story...

Ole Ulfson's picture

I reread this chapter to reacquaint myself with the characters and story line before jumping into the new chapter. I'm so glad I did! I now feel au fait with it all again... This has long been one of my favorite tales here on BC.

Thank you for the entertainment,

Ole

We are each exactly as God made us. God does not make mistakes!

Gender rights are the new civil rights!

Is Kelly two faced?

Jamie Lee's picture

One day, people are going to be surprised by Billy. He didn't understand what all the fuss was about gender - bender day, but took Mr. Markham's challenge. He didn't like getting caught or the punishment, but when explaining to Mr. Markham why he's presenting as a girl, he never tried to shift the blame onto anyone else. He stood up and took credit for being in his, her, current situation. He thought he was losing his cool, well he just found his true cool. And when others hear of his confession and his acceptance of the punishment, his status in their eyes will rise.

Kelly seems to be two faced, saying she cares about Brandon but is more interested in having Brandi back and on the cheerleading squad. She also seems willing to exert undo influence to try and push Brandon into her way of thinking or wants. Cat choosing to have her work at the shelter is going to be a real eye opener to this girl who believes her wants are important.

Brenda finally said what she should have told Brandon when they first discussed him possibly becoming a cheerleader. For him not to guilt himself into doing it and not use their needing him as the main reason for helping them.

Dr. van de Meer suspects Brandon has Asperger's, when Teri has already made that determination. These two ladies really need to meet and bring each other up to speed concerning Brandon. Teri may not be able to say much due to doctor/patient confidentiality, but the right and left hand are concerned about Brandon and need to keep each other in the loop.

Brandon believes he's made as an informed decision as he can to become a cheerleader given time restrictions. But his view is restricted because of his Asperger's since he can't factor in social ramifications. Because of this one limiting factor, Brandon is in for one rough ride as a female cheerleader.

Others have feelings too.