Out in the cold

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It was the most marvelous dream. It was like a Disney film. I was in the arms of a handsome prince being rescued from whatever spell I had been put under by the evil queen. I let out a happy little moan and sighed contentedly. I had the desire to open my eyes, tinged with the reluctance that it would mark the end of the dream and I would find myself back in my bed. I reluctantly cracked them open, squinting into the eyes of my handsome prince. Thank God, the dream wasn't over yet. I shivered with anticipation at what would come next.

“Are you alright ma'am?”

Funny, I thought the prince would say something more romantic for our first encounter. I just purred.

“Mmmm hmmmmm” I muttered dreamily.

Now the prince's chiseled face furrowed into a look of concern. Which concerned ME. This wasn't exactly the story book romance I was anticipating. I clung tighter to him. And slowly began to come out of my haze. That was no cape and cowl. It was a large coat of some industrial rubber or something. My haze began to fade as I focused my eyes and saw that my handsome prince was actually a fireman. Still quite dashing and handsome, but... I startled and my eyes flew open.

“Ah. THERE you are!” He grinned as I suddenly became aware of the bitter cold and began to shiver as he carried me the remaining distance to the paramedics.

“Wh... what happened?” I mumbled.

“Carbon monoxide. Looks like a furnace problem. We got the call from your neighbor across the hall. Her CO alarm went off. She called us in a panic when she couldn't wake her children. Lucky she bought it for their room. Usually by the time these things are discovered, it's much worse.” He stared at me, concern and ...something else... all over his face. “Much worse.”

He helped me climb out of his arms and sit where the paramedics took my pulse and blood pressure, shined lights into my eyes and asked me all sorts of inane questions. I realized at some point that they were checking to see how lucid I was. Once I understood what was going on, I relaxed and became much more cooperative. Until it got to the point where they wanted to take me back to the hospital just to make sure there were no lasting effects. I tried to be firm without being difficult. Saying the most obstinate things with a polite smile on my face. They finally relented and let me sign a few forms. I was permitted to stay behind, but couldn't return to my apartment until given the all clear by the safety officials. So I padded over in my bare feet to the small group of neighbors who were sipping something steamy in the van from the aid society.

“Hell of a welcome to the neighborhood, eh?” said a middle aged woman huddled in a blanket with her two small children. I just cracked a crooked, ambivalent smile. Any other time I would be terrified to be outside my apartment like this, but whether it was the Carbon Monoxide grogginess or coming to in the arms of that fireman, I was too bewildered to be scared. It was all just... surreal... and no no one seemed to notice or care.

“I'm Minerva. ...Boyle. But everyone just calls me Min. ...or Minnie if you're feeling formal” she smiled an easy open smile. “These are my two rug rats” she grinned with a look of tremendous love and relief as she shook the two small children peering like baby badgers from under her blanket. “...Toby and Fiona. He's eight, and she's...”

“I'm five!” she beamed and thrust out a hand with fingers outstretched.

“ALMOST five...” her mother chided with obvious pride, looking beneficently down at her.

“In...” then her other hand shot out with three additional fingers outstretched “...days!”

“Oh my!” I gasped. “You're so worldly and mature, AND you know your numbers! I was sure you were at least...” and I held up six fingers, giving her a big smile, which she happily returned. Her brother just snorted from beneath the blanket.

“We saw you moving in over the weekend, but haven't had time for formal introductions yet.” Minnie smiled. “Not the best of circumstances, but I guess we take the opportunities we get.”

I smiled, and realized she was waiting for a name. I thought to myself, oh hell, just be honest and sort the rest out later.

“Sean. Sean O'Connell” I said.

“Oooh... another Irish lass!” she said in a convincing, but presumably fake brogue. “Let me guess. The folks wanted to get back to the old roots... which their grandparents fled.... so they named you Siobhan... and you made lemonade... so all your friends and coworkers know you as Sian.” she grinned.

Oh my God. That was brilliant. I had never thought of that. And surely, sitting shivering in a Red Cross van shaking off a Carbon Monoxide hangover, it's the last thing that would have occurred to me.

“How on earth did you figure all that out?” I laughed.

Minnie just shrugged. “I had a friend growing up. She never forgave her family for naming her Siobhan. ...Said they just made her that much more of an outsider at school. Not to mention the constant spelling lessons. So she became the only girl I ever knew named Sian.” she smiled. “Until now. I never imagined I'd meet another.”

I smiled and thought to myself 'that's TWO of us!'.

“So you got all moved in quickly. Quite an army you had there. Boyfriend?”

I shrugged “Older brother. ...and some friends.” I had meant my friends, but then I realized that she presumed his friends... I just let it go.

“Well, to help out with a move like that, I suspect at least one of those boys has a thing for you.” she smiled, her eyes twinkling. I just blushed.

“I... I really don't think so....” This was getting super awkward. She had obviously seen me with my big brother Liam, my best friend Brian and his cousin Tommy, but had not made the connection to the four boys. I was always amazed at how just brushing my unwashed hair straight back, stuffing it down my upturned collar, ratty jeans, baggy fleece, mesh trucker cap and requisite slouch made me instantly invisible. No one ever took a good look at me. Ever. To my immense relief and constant disbelief.

I breathed a sigh of thanks when we were given the 'all clear' and allowed to return to the privacy of our fully ventilated homes.

I had gotten into the habit of changing out of my boy clothes the moment I got home from the very first day I could afford my own place. I always knew there would come a time when I would venture into public and meet people as my ...true self... but for now I was just content to live as a girl within the comfort of my own walls. So sleeping in my short flannel nightshirt and panties with my lace bra holding my modest silicone breast forms in place while I slept marinating in kiwi scented moisturizer was just my routine nightly indulgence. The next morning I would wash it all away and venture forth into the cold bleak world as that sad little invisi-guy, to earn another day's wage. I expected to keep up this routine indefinitely. Or at least until I screwed up the nerve to do something about it. Apparently fate had a faster timetable.

“A pleasure to meet you Sian!” Min waved as she shooed her little ones back into her flat. “And welcome to the building. I look forward to seeing more of you.” she smiled as she gently closed the door behind her.

“Me too!” I smiled as I returned to my own place to think about my future.

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Comments

a nice start

Neighbours can be such a pain! or a godsend depending upon how broadminded they are! looking forward to more of this story, thank you

interesting

Alecia Snowfall's picture

nice lead-in. I wonder how this story will progress.

quidquid sum ego, et omnia mea semper; Ego me.
alecia Snowfall

A very nice beginning......

D. Eden's picture

I hope to see more really soon!

I'm kind,of in the same situation, to be totally honest - although at the behest of my therapist that will soon be changing. My next step will be to be myself everywhere except work, until I become comfortable enough to take the final step and introduce the real me to my co-workers.

I hope that my neighbors are as understanding as Minnie!

Dallas

D. Eden

Dum Vivimus, Vivamus

Surpise!

Nice introduction to the neighborhood!!

Jeri Elaine

Homonyms, synonyms, heterographs, contractions, slang, colloquialisms, clichés, spoonerisms, and plain old misspellings are the bane of writers, but the art and magic of the story is in the telling not in the spelling.

Kat,

Kat,
Cute, and a very different way to start meeting your new neighbors. Seems like Minnie and her two children, especially the "in three days" Five year old are "keepers". I do hope this sweet little story continues for some time.
Janice

Looks Like Fate Has Stepped In..

jengrl's picture

to bring this new woman into the world even before she knows what's happened or she feels ready. I think Susan and her kids saw her for exactly who she really is. She just has to have the confidence in herself, because apparently, the world is waiting outside the door . I'm looking forward to seeing more of this story!

PICT0013_1_0.jpg

Out in the cold and nowhere to go. LOL

Min seems like a decent sort and maybe suspects that Sean is not a she. Maybe. This is a nice start to a very good story. But, About hospitals. Every time I have to go to the hospital, my designated sex is female, which is my right to demand because of my transition. Doctors and nurses don't really care who you are. All they are concerned about is the reason you were brought in. We do not have to be embarrassed about who we are. See how I sign my name below. We must first have the confidence in knowing who we are and standing up for ourselves. Thank you for sharing this first installment of a terrific story.

"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."

Love & hugs,
Barbara

"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."

Oops!

I had just intended this to be a little standalone - an open ended short story to let the reader take it wherever they will.

It was also meant as a diversion from the stalled stories I AM struggling to advance - Secondhand Life and Summer of Love.

Kind of an 'I'm still here' :-)

Maybe this story will go someplace... but for now, I will leave it to the reader to take it where they will... I'm still trying to progress the two stories that I've already started. :-)

K@

Excellent as a standlone

I love little vignettes like this.
It's a very nice little episode which has everything a short story needs.

One might think that it almost sounds too far fetched that your protagonist can change her appearance so easily with a comb and a hat, but I can remember myself when it was possible to more or less change gender using a comb and hairclips, these being the final signifiers that made the difference that flipped the way most people responded.

That gender can be that flimsy in a social setting is one of those puzzling things that keeps me bemused as to what it is really all about.
XX
AD

I agree

Monique S's picture

with Alice. Very nice!

Monique.

Monique S