The Brown Haired Teen

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The first step to woman hood

~o~O~o~

The brown haired teen sat in the chair with a nervous look on it's face. The small gold and emarald pendant that never left The Brown haired Teens neck was grasped firmly in its hand. The brown haired teens leg bounced incessantly matching the light speed rythm of its heart. A nurse emerged from the door at the other end of the room calling a name from a clipboard. The brown haired teen hated that name but stoop up and followed the nurse nonetheless. The sign on the door read " Dr. Kaufman. Gender identity specialist"
As the brown haired teen stepped through the door it took its first step on the journey to woman hood.

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Very nice, short, concise and

Very nice, short, concise and to the point. My only issue is the using of "IT" to identify the new girl. Sounds she is a thing/object rather than a person aka girl/woman. Hugs, Janice

it doesnt have an identity yet

She doesnt quite know who she is, what she is, is she a boy or girl, straight or gay, confused or not, right or wrong, a real person or just an it... at least thats how I felt.


Janice...

The character might be a girl who wants to be a boy :-) or - like the majority of the time - a boy who wants to be a girl.
The pronoun 'it' is for non humans we should start a campaign to have a new word for gender confused humans. I'm not sure what it should be but the word could be 'ith' (it with an h signifying human).

TGSine --958

I understand why you chose

I understand why you chose the pronoun 'it', but all that accomplished was to dehumanise the character you were trying to establish. A neutral name - or a nickname - would have been far more engaging.

But keep going.

Ban nothing. Question everything.

Good call I thinm this

Good call I thinm this definitly better communicates my thoughts


gender neutral names are great..

Gender neutral names like Dakota or Ash or Drew are nice for stories and also popular with today's parents, too. Even some strong boys names are being usedfor girls, too.

TGSine --958

Not bad but...

wolfjess7's picture

I must agree with the others on the use of "IT". A gender nutral name would have given you charactor a more human feeling. I felt like I was reading something more fitting for a sci-fi setting. Like you were talking about a clone or robot something like that.

May the peace and happiness of the Goddess keep and protect you
as always your humble outlaw
Jessie Wolf

It!

I think the use of "It" adds more mystery to a very short, hopefully to be expanded upon begining, nice.

"It"

Hypatia Littlewings's picture

"It" seems some how right and yet ill fit and jarring.
"It" is usually the very first pronoun used for a person.
"What is it?" "It is a boy!" "It is a girl!"
"The brown haired teen" appears trapped at the "it" point.
What is it? It is a girl! However "It" is not quite sure yet.
But "She" will be!

>i< ..:::