The Daily Dormouse. (aka Bike, est. 2007) Part 2263 by Angharad Copyright © 2013 Angharad All Rights Reserved.

“She’s being examined.” Stella updated me after I ran from the car park to the A&E department.

“What will they do?”

“Probably try an emetic then a stomach wash.”

“But she’s unconscious.”

Stella shrugged. “I told them we thought it was the pain killers she came out of here with.”

“Thanks. I can’t believe she just calmly talked to me knowing she’d taken poison.”

“Sometimes when you think you’re at the end of it all, this amazing calmness comes over you. Too late to worry then.”

“How could I have missed it?”

“Don’t beat yourself up about it, we all missed it.”

“But I only said the other day we should be watching her and I let it happen.”

“Cathy, for Chrissakes stop going off on self-indulgent guilt trips.”

That hit me like a slap in the face. I didn’t know whether to be offended and slap her back or burst into tears or what. I did nothing except keep my thoughts to myself.

Someone came out and chatted to Stella for several minutes while I sat and worried. I tried to send the blue light to Danni but there was something blocking it. Perhaps it was her time to die. What utter tosh, this kid isn’t going to die–over my dead body.

I called Stephanie who was shocked, she in turn called Sam Rose. Fifteen minutes later he was stood before me. “I’ll go and see what’s happening,” he volunteered.

“There’s a rumour they want me to come back to work.”

“I thought you’d been off too long?” I didn’t really have time for this.

“I can do a refresher course.”

“What about your girls?”

“They have a crá¨che here.”

“Oh well, give it a go.”

“I might, but they’d have to ask me after the way they treated me last time.”

Sam Rose reappeared. “They’ve pumped her out, they’re waiting for blood tests to come back and for someone to do a brain scan.”

“Brain scan?” I was horrified.

“Precautionary–she’d arrested by the time you got her here.”

My blood ran cold. “May I see her.”

“Follow me.” I did. He led me to a cubicle with a curtain across it and a monitor attached to the small body lying on the couch. She looked grey but the monitor was beeping and showing normal heart activity, as far as I knew. But then I didn’t know did I?

I found a stacking plastic chair outside the cubicle and took in alongside the bed. I sat and took Danni’s hand, the one without a drip attached. “Danni, I know you can hear me. I want you to come back to me so we can talk about this. What you did was a mistake which we can put right, but I need your help to do it. I don’t care if you want to be a boy or a girl or anything else, just come back to me. My heart is breaking without you and everyone else is upset too. Please come back to us, I beg you. We can sort out whatever problem you feel you have–I promise we will. Just come back to us, sweetheart.”

I drew down the light and felt my whole body pulsating with it. “I’m coming in to get you, please don’t obstruct me.” I sent the light down her hand and felt myself tuning in to her. I concentrated, asking the light to help me find her and bring her back safely.

At one point it felt like I was trying to swim through treacle, it was dark and seemed to cling to me hindering and obstructing my progress but I struggled through it recognising that it might be symbolic of my own emotions as a hindrance to saving Danni’s life. Suddenly I was free and as I sprinkled blue dust everywhere to find her I realised that I had no right to demand she return with me–it had to be her decision.

I found her sitting in a container of some sort which acted presumably as a fortress but also a prison. Was it this which had prevented my getting through to her earlier? In which case was it her invention or someone else’s.

I was aware that time was of the essence and while time doesn’t exist as such on the astral plane, it does on earth and things were much against the clock there. Trying to attract her attention, the container seemed to keep me out yet I could see her sitting crying inside.

Like the big bad wolf I huffed and puffed but nothing happened except I became increasingly worried and frustrated. How do I get through this barrier? Zapping it with blue light did nothing, the material it was made of simply absorbed the energy and became stronger.

In the end I sat beside it turned myself into a ball of blue light and focused on radiating love. She knew I loved her, perhaps this would get through to her, if not it might protect her on her journey to wherever she would go from here. I sent her love, by the bucketful.

Sometime later, I know there is no time up there, I thought I could hear her weeping and continuing to send the love, I opened my eyes and noticed that the barrier was melting. I resisted the temptation to try and call her, I just continued to send the love and finally she became aware of me.

“What are you doing here, Mummy?”

“I’ve come to take you home, my child.”

“It’s too late isn’t it?”

“It’s never too late to put things right.”

“I’m sorry, Mummy, I did something silly.”

“I know, sweetheart, but we can put that right, too.”

“I love you, Mummy.”

“Actions speak louder than words.”

“You’re cross with me?”

“No, I’m not cross, I’m just not prepared to accept that statement without you demonstrating it’s true.”

“But you love me.”

“It’s not my love which is under scrutiny.”

“But you know I love you.”

“So you say.”

“But I do, Mummy.”

“Prove it.”

“What?” she gasped.

“You heard. If you really love me, you’d be prepared to prove it, wouldn’t you?”

“If you think that, does that mean you don’t love me?” I wasn’t expecting that riposte.

“I’m here, aren’t I?”

“Yeah.”

“It wasn’t easy getting here or speaking with you. I’ve got plenty of things I could be doing instead but I choose to be here with you, because I love you. I’m putting my money where my mouth is.”

“Oh, yeah, okay what have I got to do to prove I love you?”

“Come back with me, help me to resolve this problem.”

“I dunno, Mummy, I just seem to always do the wrong thing, don’t I?”

“Providing you learn from your mistakes, they can be very positive experiences.”

“Maybe I’m just stupid then.”

“You might be if you stay here, come with me and show me that you have the courage to face your problems, we’ll all be there with you, helping you and giving you our love. Don’t let it end like this, Danni, you’ll make everyone so sad and I think the effect on Trish would be very traumatic.” If all else fails try blackmail.

“She’ll get over it.”

“What if she doesn’t? What if she does the same as you?”

“You’re not gonna hang that on me.”

“I will and you’ll deserve it. You obviously don’t love us, your words are empty. I won’t bother you again. Goodbye, Danielle, we still love you.”

I turned to walk away and I felt some movement behind me but I kept walking.

“Wait, Mummy, wait–I’m coming with you,” and I felt her hand in mine. A moment later I felt a huge jolt and I was back in the cubicle with Danni, her hand was squeezing mine, albeit very weakly but I knew things were going to improve.