A Letter to My Step-Father

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A letter to my step father

Dear Ken,

I had the urge to write to you, to finally end the hold you have on my soul. You caused me a lot of pain, back in the day, and its long past time for me to deal with it. In some ways, you had the odds stacked against you from the day you came into our lives. You were being asked to replace my fallen father, and instead of a couple of normal kids, you were saddled with one mentally wounded boy, and me - a broken human being stuck between genders.

But unfortunately, you didn’t rise to the challenge you were given. You slipped into alcohol abuse, and soon allowed drinking to destroy all of our lives. And then there was the physical and mental abuse you inflicted on us. You caused a lot of damage to me, and some of those scars remain with me to this day. I only hope by the cold light of day you realize how wrong your treatment of us was.

But that’s enough condemnation. Today isnt about opening old wounds, but to heal them, once and for all. And the only way I know how to do that is to forgive you, and ask for your forgiveness. I have allowed resentment to fester too long, and I am quite sure I was far from a perfect child for you in any case.

So I ask for your forgiveness, and I give you mine in exchange. I’m going to do my best to leave what happened in the past, where it belongs, and not let it define me any longer.

So this is me, letting you go now. Good luck in wherever your life takes you from here.

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Comments

Thank you Dorothy,

ALISON

'good girl,you can't change the past but unfortunately you can't forget it,either,but it is
better to bury some things,where they belong,in the past.

ALISON

thank you, Alison

Its a process - not done yet, but getting there. Thanks for the support.

Dorothycolleen

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Writing is so cathartic Dorothy.

WebDeb's picture

I have not yet reached the stage where I can forgive my alchoholic father.
Your sincere words does give me hope for the future.
Thankyou for sharing :)

forgiveness isnt easy

I can't say I'm totally there, but its coming. You'll get there. Thanks for your support, Deb.

Dorothycolleen

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Give us the courage

Give us the courage to change what we can,
The serenity to live with that which we cannot change, and the wisdom to know the difference.

I spent years despising those who I blamed for my situation. Now I realise that they were as ignorant as I was, perhaps even more so.

Positive thought leads to positive action, which led to a calmness which is infinely better than the pain that I inflicted upon myself.

S.

changing the cycle

Yes, its a lot better than pain. Not always easy, but we can do it. Thanks so much for your support, Susan.

Dorothycolleen

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Brave and I think much needed Dorothy.

I'm so glad you're facing this down honey. There was a lot of things there unsaid but just known by those who've lived it themselves. You're a brave woman.
*Big Hugs*
Bailey.

Bailey Summers

leaving things unsaid

It didn't feel like the place to re-hash all the old wounds, since the point of this is to put the past into the past once and for all. Thanks for your support, Bailey.

Dorothycolleen

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Forgive??

/

A Nice ride around Manchester to finish off the Sparkle weekend.

Forgive ... wee-ell maybe (But it's a big maybe.) Forget... NEVER! Move on ... Definitely.

When there is no recourse to requittal or reconciliation, then moving on is the only practical solution.

XZXX.

Bev.

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moving on

darn right, hon. I just don't want to be held hostage by these memories any more.

Dorothycolleen

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A Letter to My Step-Father

Forgiveness of past wrongs is something that very few are able to do. I hope to be strong enough to forgive any who wrong me.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine