My Despair-4

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My Despair-4

By Stanman63
Thanks To JennaFL For Proofing And Nora Adrienne for editing
Synopsis:After she meets her brother who she has not seen since the attack, Terri is reminded of their life long rivalry, but all too son, reality enters as she hear news that causes her to despair.

From My Despair-3
Then I saw my brother enter in looking good in his scruffily jeans, sneakers, red sweat shirt with a Star Fleet Engineering logo and his Letterman Jacket.

"BRO!" I yelled as he caught me in a bear hug.

"Hiya, Squirt. I see that you're making sure that Momma has to use her Woolite on her blouses, again," he teased. I always one to cry while watching a good movie.

"Tommy, have you taken care of things?" asked Daddy.

"What things?"

"Terri, your Daddy asked for your brother Tommy Todd to pick up your school assignments until the end of the semester for you," Momma told me as he handed me the first of many sheets of typed paper. In order to save funds, the Board Of Education had decide to purchase a limited number of books and have students use electronic books filled with the correct text books with an up sweep in student's grades.

So far, enough savings had been done to pay for a Student Center near City Hall with a Student Center being planned for each school.

"Thanks! I totally forgot about classes. Now I can keep up with my schoolwork."

"You do that Sissy. I can't have you dropping out on our contest to see which of us is the Valedictorian and which of us is the Salutatorian, this year," challenged Tommy Todd.
[*][*][*]
Ever since we were little, Tommy Todd and I had been the smartest students in our grade. T.T. excelled in sports, while my domain was always more intellectual with chess.

I could see the anger in my brother's eyes over my ordeal which came out in his seemingly idle banter that hid a fury over my ordeal best not to tempt. In the past, some students from rival Eastmont High School had broken onto the Bay City High School campus and trashed the schooner that Bay City Queen that Bay City High School alumni Governor Anne Novack had dedicated fifty years ago.

The Bay City Queen stayed moored at a dock at Bay City Pier next to the Bay City Water Park where we had fun at our own amusement park filled with water themed rides, a roller coaster, bumper cars, a petting zoo as well as an arcade and skateboard rink.

When they trashed the Bay City Queen, they also caused damage to the water park, forcing it to be closed before the Labor Day Festival where the Bay City Water Park shut down, leaving only the Bay City Queen open.

Tommy Todd took the Bay City High School Cavaliers and found the football team Eastmont High School Green Wave and they basically hauled them back to the scene of their crime and forced them to clean up the mess that they made and extracted funds from them to finance the repairs that they couldn't do.

But now he was all too ready to commit violence on my behalf, simply waiting to see if he was needed in that capacity. But as much as he wanted to deal out justice, I wanted too even more. Living with this humiliation was almost too much. If they got off, I would end it all with a gun. Murder is easy when you have no hope.

As much as much family and friends loved me, I was clinically depressed and suicidal. I was holding on for them, not me. I wanted to die in order to escape from my pain, but at the same time, I didn't want to put them through the ordeal of dealing with my suicide.

So, in order to deal with my dilemma, I chose to let the Court decide our fate of Life or Death; a conviction would mean that we lived, anything else would mean our deaths. It took Shelly to pierce through my despair and see my resolve and help Daddy to plan on how to stop me.
[*][*][*]
Shelly was really wonderful. Under her guidance, I told her about how I had come out to my family and their reactions to me. Through her eyes I saw how they truly felt about me and how my news affected them.

Daddy thought that I was making a mistake in wanting to be a girl, yet he also saw in me an inner fire that would not be quenched which in a way, pleased him. He was proud that I had chosen to be myself and became my champion.

Mother was worried that I would never be able to look like a girl, but when the hormones and blockers I became a younger version of her, she knew that I was safe and I rely became her daughter.

As for my twin brother Tommy Todd who looked just like Daddy, when he found out, the only real change was that now instead of him bating me in sports, I tended to match him as I entered into the Girl's Athletic Program and played on their teams as well as cheered.

But when Grant learned about the new me, he knew that we would never again be the classic Three Musketeers. He now saw me as Maid Marion of Robin Hood, Bonnie of Bonnie and Clyde, Lois Lane to his Superman, as well as Selina Kyle to his Bruce Wayne.

I told Shelly about how I went out in public as a girl at the Ice Rink wearing a gold colored dress and how scared and excited I was as well as the grounding that I got for defying curfew. But as mad as my parent were, they were even more proud that I had the gumption to be so brazen as to challenge their authority as well as daring anybody to pierce my disguise.

As I got older, I earned the right to wear makeup,and get my ears pierced. By the time that I was entering Bay City Middle School, my school I.D. Card listed me as Terri Lynn: Female. And thanks to Daddy, I had started on blockers that totally feminized my body for me.

I was very fortunate in that my body accepted the blockers as permission to develop as a girl. I began to develop during the summer before my freshman year at Bay City Middle School and stared wearing a trainer. By the time that school started, I was an "A" cup that matured into a "C" cup in my freshman year in High School.

Best of all, I was accepted as a girl in Bay City Middle School and Bay City Middle School thanks to the open mind policy about the LGBT Community by the Bay City Board Of Education.

Thanks to the blockers, I went through a female puberty as my body accepted the blockers and started producing estrogen in place of testosterone. My hips grew wider and my body fat distributed to my hips and chest to give me a girly figure.

Oh, I was still a boy in my groin, but it was basically functioning as a means of urinary outlet and was easily hidden by my panty. To keep my from developing complications, I went to Mother's gynecologist Doctor Joanne McCoy. Momma went to college with her where Doctor McCoy specialized in holistic psychiatric medicine.

She was a firm believer in treating the entire person, she was a Psychiatrist who used the concept of holistic medicine to help her patients. She preferred to prescribe herbs and spices over pills and worked with her husband Markus Leonard McCoy who owned and operated a restaurant that used only eco-friendly range free meat, dairy and organic produce from local farmers.

They were firm believers in farming the way that our fore fathers did before the mega farms had ruined the land with chemical based fertilizers over organic fertilizers and rotation farming where crops were rotated so that one crop would prepare he soil for another.

When they read in the Bible where Israel was given the concept by God, they laughed because both were devout Christians who devoted much of their spare time to helping at in the Bay City Community Center.

There, she was the on call physician who operated the Bay City Community Center Medical Center where she dispensed her brand of medicine which both students and parents loved as she kept the Bay City Community Center Canteen filled with natural sweets, juices and salads that made playing there a treat.

According to her, when I started on my treatment, I was as healthy as any other girl my age and there was no need to have an orchiectomy as my testes were not cancerous. But during my freshman summer vacation in Bay City High School, I had it done as by then, they were starting to show signs of cancer.

The doctor was able to take the skin and with very small saline pouches, stretched the skin and manipulated it into a set of groin hugging mounds that looked natural, leaving my penis alone so that my panty was flush with my groin, leaving no bulge.
[*][*][*]
Yes, Tommy Todd was there for me when I heard the dreaded news that the case was dismissed due to lack of evidence.
[*][*][*]
End Of Part Four
To Be Continued In My Despair-5

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