Jamie Finds Acceptance

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Jamie Finds Acceptance

By Patricia Marie Allen

I remember when it started. It was a Saturday in the September of my eighth year. My sister had a nine o'clock dentist appointment and my brother was spending the weekend with friends. I should have been able to sleep in, but Dad got a call from work. He worked in the maintenance department and something had gone wrong with the compressor and it had to be fixed before Monday at six a.m. He woke me at eight and told me that he had to leave and it would be up to me to get the Goodwill bags out on the porch for the Boy Scouts by nine.

I had stayed up late the night before, watching the late movie on TV. I was a little groggy and was moving extra slow. I dressed in a fog and went in search of the Goodwill bags. I found them in the upstairs hall closet. I grabbed the first two and drug them down the stairs and put them on the porch. Back upstairs, I decided to put one on each shoulder and carry the last two like a sailor. I stumbled on the landing. One bag rolled down the stairs and the other fell six or seven feet to the hall below. The latter burst its top open when it hit. I went down and put the intact bag on the porch. Leaving the door open, I went back to refill the burst bag. I was trying to work quickly. The last item I picked up, was a pair of lemon yellow panties.

My arm stopped mid-motion. I looked at the panties. I had never paid much attention to girl’s underwear before. I had seen them hanging on clotheslines and laying in laundry baskets before but I had never touched them. These were incredibly soft. First, I rubbed them between my fingers, then I brought them up to touch my cheek. They were so silky and smooth; I was enthralled by their texture. I held them out and looked at them. There seemed to be nothing wrong with them. At first, I couldn't imagine why Paula had put them in the Goodwill. Then I realized that in the last year my sister had gone from a skinny twelve-year-old tomboy to a shapely thirteen-year-old young woman. These would not have fit her recently widened hips comfortably. They weren't much bigger then my jockey shorts.

Just then I heard a Boy Scout run up on our porch to grab the first of our bags. I wasn't through examining the panties. I quickly stuffed them in my shirt and took the remaining bag to the porch just in time to hand it to the second scout.

I went back to my room. As I sat on my bed, I drew the panties from inside my shirt. I noticed the delicious feel as the silky material rubbed against my skin. I laid them on the bed and smoothed them out. I studied them. There was a yellow rose sewn on the front, just to one side. It had a little bit of white lace around it. I noticed the waistband was considerably narrower then on my jockey shorts. It had the tiniest lace on its edge. The leg holes had the same lacy elastic around them.

Curious, I got out a pair of my Jockeys and laid them next to the panties. They certainly looked the same size. I put the jockey shorts on top of the panties. The panties may have been just ever so slightly larger. I switched them, smoothing the panties. I really liked the feel. It was hard to say if the panties were really bigger or not. I was sure that if I had them on, I could tell in an instant.

I took off my pants and shorts and put the panties on. As they slid up my leg, the feel was intoxicating. I forgot all about the size difference. They fit me OK and they felt GOOD. If they felt this good, how would it feel to wear a slip? I was sure that they were made of the same material. It looked the same. I went immediately to my sister’s room. I search for her slips and found one hanging on a hook behind her closet door. I put it on and was in heaven.

I ran my hands up and down my body, relishing the feel of the material. The top of the slip was a little loose. I had seen a bra in one of her drawers. I took off the slip and struggled to get the bra on. After two or three frustrating tries at hooking it behind me, I fastened the hooks in front of me and slid it around the right way to slip my arms through the straps.

Donning the slip again I notice that it fit a bit better. As I looked at myself in her mirror, I was amazed at how much bust line I had. I looked down at the bra inside the slip. I pulled one of the cups out and felt of it. It was thick. My sister wasn't as big on top as she looked. I began to wonder if she had anything there at all. I finally decided she must, because there was an empty space between my chest and the padding. She must have something that went in there.

I began to wonder if her slip fit me this good, how would her dresses fit? I went back to the closet and picked out a summer dress that had puffy cap sleeves and a full skirt. It zipped up the back. I was just enough of a contortionist to be able to zip it. I hoped I would be able to do the trick again when I wanted to get out of it.

My sister was several inches taller then I. This dress hit her at the knees, but it hit me mid-calf. I got out a pair of her lacy socks and put them on and tried on some of her shoes. I looked pretty neat but my hair wasn't right. I brushed it forward and put on one of her scarves. The clothes were for an older girl, but I looked like a girl.

I swirled and swished, watching myself in the mirror. I couldn't keep from grinning. After a while, I hurriedly put everything but the panties back where I got them. I knew I'd be in big trouble if anyone caught me doing that. But it didn't stop me from trying it again. At first it was catch as catch can. However by the time I was ten, I was riding a bike to school and didn't have to rely on the bus to get home. That put me home at least an hour before anyone else. That gave me time to put on a dress and enjoy about twenty minutes in it and still leave a margin for error to get out of it.

The margin for error was too close only once. My brother got a ride home from high school and caught me in the living room in my sister dress. I begged him not to tell anyone about it.

"Well, I guess we're even,” he said. "You didn't tell Dad about me and Mike smoking behind the garage last week. If you want to wear Paula's clothes, I won't be the one to rat on you. But if you keep it up, you'll get caught sooner or later. You just wait and see.” After that I was more careful then ever. I proved him wrong.

When I was eleven, I had the whole thing down to a science. Home at 3:36. In a dress by 3:40. Enjoy myself until 4:00. (It was an hour and five minute drive or a hour and fifteen minute bus trip from either Ron's or Paula's school.) Out of the dress by 4:05. Dad didn't get home until 5:00. On some Fridays, I could stretch the time to 4:45. That is if there was a football game scheduled for right after school. Ron and Paula would get home after Dad on those days. They had to tell Dad on Thursday at dinner if they were going to the football game or he would be mad.

Summers were always a drag. I got almost no time at home alone. The good news was that when I was home alone, it was usually most of the day. I could spend some real time in Paula's dresses. On those occasions, I did a regular fashion show. One time, I ended up wearing dresses before Paula.

She had a special date coming up and bought a new dress the Saturday before. I wore it every day for a week and then she went to have her hair done on Saturday. Ron had spent the weekend with Mike and Dad had to work I got five straight hours in that special dress before she even went on the date.

It was about then that eminent domain reared its ugly head. It was in that year, they built a new freeway through our neighborhood. Dad tried to fight it. They hadn't offered what he thought was a fair price of our house. By the time he got the money from the state and paid the lawyers, we didn't have enough left over for a down payment on another house. Dad tried desperately to keep from changing school districts because Paula was a senior and he didn't want her to have to go to another school her last year.

We ended up in a rental about a half a mile away. It was great for me. It added three minutes to my ride home and required Paula and Ron to transfer another time on the bus. That added fifteen minutes to their commute.

That was a temporary solution. We had to move again the next summer. Our rental went up for sale and Dad still didn't have enough to buy it. The new owner intended to live in it. This time, we couldn't find anything in my school district. Dad did manage to keep us in the same high school district. That meant that Ron could stay in the same school for his senior year.

I had to make new friends. No big deal. I didn't have that much in common with the guys at my school anyway. I don't think any of them were wearing their sister’s clothes after school. Since I was, and was rather addicted to it, I didn't hang around after school for softball or hoops like some of the guys. I guess you could say I was a loner.

I didn't get along with my brother that well anyway. He was four years older and had always resented the fact that I took Mom's attention away from him. Add to that, that it was my loose mouth that let it slip that she had a boy friend. A fact that made her run off when I was five. I heard later that she was afraid that Dad would kill the boy friend. No matter how you cut it that wouldn't have worked out for anyone.

I guess I'd have to admit that Mom treated me special. I can remember that she told me I was her last baby. She took me with her everywhere. I was at least four years old before she left me with a baby sitter. My sister and brother were left, but Mom dragged me along. That's how I knew about her boy friend. She would take me on their dates.

She also tried to protect me from myself. When we would go visiting, my brother was always asked to go outside to play. I was asked to play quietly inside. That usually meant that I was in the company of the girls in the family. When Mom ran off she got her boy friend drunk and hitchhiked to California. Apparently she couldn't figure a way to take me.

Dad found a lady down the street who had two girls about my age to take care of me until I was school age. In those days, all single parents had latch key kids. No one worried exactly how old they were. During the school year, my Dad made arrangements for me to stay after until my brother and sister were let out and I came home with them. My brother, of course, left my care to my sister. She and I became accustomed to each other. As a result of all that, I was just more comfortable around girls.

So when my new neighborhood had only one family with kids in it, a single mother named Mrs. Adams with two girls it didn't phase me in the slightest. Angela and Kim didn't seem any more concerned about me being a boy, then I was them being girls. Dad had taken three weeks vacation to rebuild the engine of his car. He and Ron worked the whole time on that. Since Mom had always insulated me from that kind of thing, I wasn't interested in it at all. I spent the whole month of August playing at Angela and Kim's. I noticed that Mrs. Adams always dressed her girls in skirts or dresses. Even when they were playing. And she always wore a dress herself as well.

We played hopscotch in their driveway, Jacks on their front porch and tag in their back yard. The best thing was, they had a swing set in the back yard as well. Sometimes, we would help their mother bake in the kitchen. Angela and Kim teased me because Mrs. Adams wanted us to all wear aprons to protect our clothes and all she had were the kind with ruffles around the edges. But I laughed with them. I secretly wished she had the wrap around kind that were more like wearing a dress.

I was practically panicked when I realized that Paula had spent the whole time packing up her clothes to go off to college. She had won a scholarship to state that would cover tuition and was eligible for a grant that would take care of housing and books. My supply of girls clothes would be clear a cross the state. Frantic, I managed to snatch a few pair of panties and a slip from the wash. That would have to do.

Dressing up wasn't as much fun, but it still felt good. Some days, I would wear panties instead of jockey shorts. That was nice, but it didn't compare to wearing a dress and spending time feeling the swish of soft silky fabric around my legs. Things were soon to change.

School started and I didn't make many friends among the boys at school. They all lived too far from me to spend any time with them after school or during weekends. Oh they were friendly enough at school but I'm not very athletic so I didn't try very hard to be included in softball games or such. Mostly, I would go straight home from school. Occasionally, I would stop at Angela's for a while. On weekends I would play there.

Halloween fell on a Friday, but I couldn't quite get into the spirit. It had been my sister who had always figured out my costumes. Finally, I went as a hobo. It wasn't much fun, Paula had always taken me around and we laughed at all the costumes of the other kids we saw. It was more about having fun with my sister than getting candy. Don't get me wrong, I liked getting the candy. But it was the night out with my sister that I really enjoyed.

The next day, I was up at Angela's as usual. One of their cousins, Shirley, was visiting. Shirley was 14. She was too old to go out trick or treating, but she liked dressing up in a costume. Her family had had an awesome party the night before. Angela and Kim had missed it because they had accepted and invitation to a party from a friend at school. Shirley was filling them in on all that went on at the party.

When she got around to telling about peoples costumes. She went on and on about their cousin Milt who went as a girl. That really got my attention. Shirley said that he borrowed his sister dress. She said it was a riot. He put on the costume about 10:00 in the morning. While his sister was helping find something to wear, she dared him to wear her underwear. What's more, he took the dare. He wore a bra and a slip and panties. His sister combed out his hair in a girl’s style and did a little make up. He really looked like a girl.

Everybody was laughing. I was green with envy. I didn't want to let them know that I wished I had been a girl on Halloween. Shirley told the other girls that she thought I would look good in a dress. Angela and Kim took up the thought immediately. I began to get flustered just thinking about the possibility. I guess my emotions began to show because they insisted that I would make a good girl. The teasing and my protesting became a little loud and Mrs. Adams came in to see what all the fuss was about.

"I was telling them about Milt's Halloween costume," Shirley said. "You were at the party. Didn't he make a good looking girl?"

"Yes he did. His sister did a great job with his hair. I think it's shorter than yours James."

"Did Milt really wear Anne's underwear?" Angela asked.

"Well, it was obvious he had on a bra and I did see a slip show once when he bent over."

"What about panties? Did he wear panties? Shirley said he did."

"Well I don't know about that. He didn't lift up his dress."

"Anne told me she dared him to and he did," Shirley said.

"Well, that could be. Milt never was one to back down from a dare."

"I'll bet James would look good as a girl," Shirley said again.

"Yeah, James," Angela chimed in. "You should dress up like a girl."

"Halloween is over and my sister's gone to college. She took all her clothes with her. I couldn't even if I wanted to."

"You can borrow one of my dresses if you want," Angela said slyly. I was sure it would fit. It wasn’t the first time I had considered how her clothes would look on me. She was just few inches taller than I was. I could feel the color begin to rise I my cheeks. Shirley picked up on it.

"Look at him blush. He's thinking about it. You want to do it don't you James?"

"No I don't.” My voice didn't sound very convincing. Not even to me.

"What, are you chicken?"

"No I'm not chicken!"

"Come on we dare you," Angela prompted.

I was getting more embarrassed. Not by what they said, but by the fact that I really wanted to. I could feel it in my guts. It was everything I could do to keep from jumping up and saying something stupid like, "Can I really? Can I really?” I finally, managed to say. "No, I don't think so.” There was a strange, almost shaky, quality to my voice. I never sounded that way before.

All the girls tucked hands into their chest and flapped their elbows up and down making clucking sounds and saying "Chicken." Mrs. Adams was even laughing.

"You know James," she said. "Angela's dress would fit you." And she laughed some more.

"I double dare you,” Shirley said.

"If I did, you guys would tell everyone at school. The teasing I'm getting here for being chicken is nothing compared to the teasing I'd get there for wearing a dress.” That was my last ditch effort to stem the tide within me to rush forward and wear her dress. It was more an argument for me to resist then it was for them to give it up.

Things took on a different tone. It wasn't teasing so much as pleading.

"No I won't,” Shirley said. "Cross my heart and hope to die," she continued, holding up her left while tracing an X over her chest with her right hand.

"Me too,” Kim said copying the gesture.

"You know girls," Mrs. Adams put in seriously. "If he does this, I'm a witness to your promise. If you break it I will severely punish you. So don't think you can get away with making a false promise. Do either of you want to take back your promise?"

They each shook their head no. I looked at Shirley. "I promise I won't tell anyone either," she said.

"I'll hold you to your promise too. You know how your mother feels about making promises," Mrs. Adams told her. Then to me, she said. "Well, what do you say James? Do you want to see what you'd have looked like if you had been a girl for Halloween?"

"Come on James. It'll be fun,” Angela said taking my hand.

I couldn't resist any longer. I looked down. "OK."

Mrs. Adams led the way upstairs to Angela's bed room. With out asking just how far I wanted to go, she got out a dress and a slip from the closet and one of Angela's padded training bras. I took off my shirt. While the girls watched with fascination, she helped me put on the bra. My heart was pounding like a steam engine under a load. She bunched up the slip and put it over my head. The dress followed suit. I kicked of my shoes and began to take off my socks. Mrs. Adams picked up my shoes and said.

"Your feet are bigger then Angela's. I'd better see if I have something you can wear.” I turned my back to take off my pants and she left the room. As she headed for her room Shirley spoke up. Directing her remark more to follow her then for anyone in the room.

"Are you going to wear Angela's panties too, James?"

"I don't want a boy to wear my panties,” Angela said loudly.

When Mrs. Adams returned, she not only had a pair of shoes, she also had a pair of pink panties with lots of lace at the leg openings and a pair of silky knee socks.

"If you want to wear panties, you can wear mine. I don't mind,” she said spreading her load on Angela's bed. I blushed.

"Come on James. Don't chicken out now. You've got everything else on. Milt acted like it was fun," Shirley teased.

"Yeah James. What's a pair of panties after all of that?" Angela asked.

I shrugged my shoulders and picked up the panties. I could feel the fire in my ears, but that was nothing compared to the desire in my gut. I turned my back on all of them and changed from jockey shorts to panties. I sat on the bed while Mrs. Adams pulled my socks up to my knees and tried her shoes on me. She took my hand and led me to the bathroom where she brushed my hair and teased it finally; she sprayed it with hair spray. She put a little blush on my cheeks and some light lipstick on my mouth. Then she turned me around to face the mirror. I looked more like a girl then I ever had.

Out in the hall, I got the whole effect in a full-length mirror. "Now you have to stay that way for the rest of the day, Jamie," Shirley said. Everyone laughed.

"OK. No sense changing back right away. What ever Milt did, I can do.” It would only be for a couple of hours. I had to be home for dinner at 6:00 and it was already past 3:00. It felt really great to be fully dressed like a girl and I didn't want it to end any sooner then it had to. Who knew when I would get another chance?

Aside from my own excitement, The rest of the day was uneventful. After I had changed back to my own clothes and was ready to leave, Shirley remarked. "Well you're a good sport but you didn't do everything Milt did. He wore his costume to the school on Friday for the school party and then put it on again in the morning for the family party and didn't take it off until he went to bed that night."

"Well I couldn't do that. I have to go home for dinner."

"You could come back tomorrow, early. Maybe Aunt Judy could have you stay for dinner and you could stay until just before your bed time.” My heart jumped. I looked at Mrs. Adams. There must have been a pleading look in my eyes.

"I don't see why you couldn't. Tell your Dad that you want to watch the Disney special after dinner with us and I've invited you to stay for dinner. He can call me if he wants."

"See you tomorrow, Jamie," Shirley said.

I was back in the morning before 9:00. The girls hadn't even gotten out of bed. As Mrs. Adams opened the door, I knew I was too early. She was still in her nightgown and robe.

"Well you're here early. The girls aren't up yet."

"Oh. Do you want me to come back later?"

"No, no. Come on in. I'll just slip in to Angela's bedroom and get some things for you to wear. You can change in my bedroom. It will be a surprise for the girls when they wake up.” She motioned me to follow her upstairs. She opened her door and held her finger to her lips. She held her hand up for me to stay. She was back in a few minutes with Angela's clothes. She closed the door. Silently she helped me change. I left my jeans on until I had the dress on. It wasn't the same one as yesterday. This one was a little more feminine. It had a fuller skirt and more sewn on decorations. Again I turned my back and dropped my pants. She helped me on with my socks and shoes. In the end she opened her lingerie drawer and invited pick out a pair of panties to wear.

"Don't be shy. I have every thing from plain, to fancy," she said holding up a pair white hip huggers in one hand and lacy red French cuts in the other. She tossed them back in the drawer and said, "The choice is yours.” She stepped back and smiled.

I peered in. I had never seen such a selection of panties. She was right. She did have everything from plain to fancy. It was like I was in a candy store and had only enough to by one piece of candy. She said nothing more. Finally I chose a pair of blue hip huggers with a wide stretch lace waistband and changed into them.

In the bathroom, she worked her magic on my hair again. It seemed to me that she took a little more time with it. She added a beribboned barrette. She added just a touch of blush and lipstick. This time she got out some brown mascara and did my eyelashes. Without notice, she picked up her perfume and sprayed a little on each side of my neck. She took my hand and looked at it.

"You know Milt wore nail polish. Do you want to?"

She couldn't know how much I wanted to. I swallowed hard. Gave a little shrug. "OK," I said with too much quiver in my voice.

She took out some pink nail polish the same color as the lipstick I was wearing. When she was through, she sent me downstairs while she got dressed. She had told me to sit at the kitchen table with my hands flat on the table to wait for my nails to dry. I did take a minute to look at myself in the full-length mirror. I looked more like a girl then I had yesterday. The thought of spending the whole day like this sent shivers up my spine. I was going to enjoy every moment. Next year, I was going to be a girl for Halloween -- some how, some way.

When Mrs. Adams came down, she asked. "Have you had breakfast?"

"No."

"I think your nails are dry. Would you like to help me make hot cakes and eggs with bacon? The smell of the bacon cooking should wake the girls. I left their bedroom doors open."

"OK."

She tied one of her frilly aprons on me and got out the ingredients for hot cakes. Coaching me as I mixed them up, she put the bacon in a pan and began to fry it. By the time the bacon was done I had the hot cake batter ready. We had cooked ten or eleven of them when Angela and Shirley came in. They stopped at the door and stared. It was as if they couldn't believe their eyes. Just then Kim showed up.

"Jamie," she shouted. "What are you doing here?"

"Helping get breakfast."

"Sit down girls, the last hot cake is in the pan. I'll have the eggs ready in a minute,” Mrs. Adams said.

I had sat the table while the hot cakes cooked. Each of the girls took a place. I got out the milk from the frig, and the syrup from the cupboard. Mrs. Adams put the hot cakes on the table and cracked ten eggs in the fry pan. By the time everyone had poured the milk and put butter and syrup on their pancakes, she had the eggs on small plates, setting next to each of us.

It was a nice day out. A little crisp, but the sun was shining and the sky was clear. We decided to play out in the back yard. Mrs. Adams came up with a coat for me to wear and we played on the swing set. We were taking turns on the slide. Angela was behind me as I climbed up. She giggled and whispered something to Shirley. "Uh-huh,” Shirley said grinning.

"What?" I said sitting at the top of the slide.

"Oh nothing, but that dress is short enough that when we stand behind you we can see your panties when you reach the top of the slide," Shirley told me. I felt my cheeks flush. "Well, it’s not like you never saw a girls panties when she was at the top of a slide. Don't tell my you haven't."

"Well, yes, but not on purpose. It's, well, girls always wear panties and I don't.” The girls all laughed. "Well, it's embarrassing," I said fighting back tears.

"If it makes you feel any better, you can stand behind me while I climb up. You can probably see my panties too. My dress isn't any longer then yours," Angela said.

"Come stand here,” Shirley said. "And you can watch us all climb the slide. That will make it fair. After all, we're all girls today, so what difference does it make if you see our panties or we see yours."

I did just that. First Angela climbed up. She was right. Her panties were yellow. Next came Shirley. She made a big deal out of bending over right at the top of the slide to brush and imaginary obstruction out of the way. Hers were blue with pink hearts. Kim blushed as she started up the ladder.

"I haven't seen yours yet," she told me. "You have to let me stand there while you climb up."

"OK.”

She climbed up. Her dress was shortest of all. She had on teal green panties. When she slid down I climbed up while she stood where I had. I looked back down as I stood on the top rung. I put a knee on the slide and bent over and brushed at the unseen obstruction. As I did, I looked back around the slide to see the big grin on Kim's face. She got a first rate look at my panties.

After that, I caught each of the girls positioning themselves to see if they could see up my dress at different times. Shirley apparently liked the game. She was particularly careless, letting me have glimpses of her panties while giving me a knowing look. The other girls slipped up and I saw their panties sometimes, but I'm sure that Shirley went out of her way to let me see hers. In return, when she was in position to see, I got careless as well. This always got big smile from her.

After lunch we played Hop Scotch in the driveway. I had a little scare. I saw my Dad drive by. He glanced our way, but didn't look twice. I waited in fear that he would come to the realization that he had seen his son in a dress and would be back. I didn't really relax for almost an hour.

After dinner, we settled in to watch the Disney Special I had used as an excuse to stay past dinner. It was over at eight.

"Oh, Shirley, I forgot. I promised your mother I have you home by 8:30. We'd better hustle. Come girls get your coats on. We all bundled up and piled into her car. When Mrs. Adams pulled up in front of Shirley's house, she said. "Tell your mother I can't come in. I have to get Jamie back right away. I'll call her tomorrow."

"Bye everybody. Jamie, you did everything that Milt did. It was fun playing with you today. Maybe we can do it again sometime."

Back at Angela's, I hurriedly took off the fingernail polish and change back into my clothes. I made it home just in time for bed.

Angela didn't say anything at school. She just acted as if everything was as usual. I have to admit I was afraid that she just might feel compelled to tell someone. I watched her closely. She never even whispered to anyone all week. I figured my secret was safe. Friday as I was unlocking my bike, she came up to me and asked.

"My mom wanted to know if you were coming over this weekend."

"Yeah, probably. I don't have any other plans."

"She said you could come as early as you like."

"OK."

I woke up about 9:00 on Saturday. After a breakfast of cold cereal, I got dressed and headed for Angela's. I knocked on the door and Mrs. Adams opened it.

"Hi, come on in," she said. "Girls, James is here," she called toward the living room. Then turning back to me, "Or will it be Jamie again?" she teased.

Just then, Angela came into the hall. "Be Jamie again, I dare you," she said. I looked at Mrs. Adams. I half hoped she'd say it wasn't a good idea. But I knew in my heart that if she didn't I'd be wearing a dress again. Because the other half wished she'd say she really wanted me to wear a dress.

"Don't look at me. I don't care what kind of clothes you wear," she grinned.

"Come on," Angela insisted. "It's more fun when you're Jamie."

"Yeah. Be Jamie," Kim added.

I looked at Mrs. Adams again. She gestured up the stairs. Today I would wear a blue dress that had a decorative apron sewn on it, with a belt that tied behind it. She sent me into her room to get my own panties. I picked a pair of pink ones with a lace panel across the front. It was dampish outside so we played inside. I stayed for lunch. But in giving permission to stay for lunch my Dad said I was to be home by 6:00. When I had to change back, my disappointment must have shown.

Mrs. Adams gave me a hug and whispered in my ear. "Why don't you keep the panties on. You can bring them back tomorrow.” Then standing back up, she said. "Why don't you come early tomorrow. You can help me get breakfast for these sleepy heads again."

When I showed up at 8:30, Mrs. Adams let me in and sent me straight to her room. She had laid out one of Angela's dresses, a bra, a slip and some lacy socks. Her lingerie drawer was open. She let me dress myself. Today my dress was green plaid. It had a full skirt that hit me just below the knees. For panties, I picked a lemon yellow pair with a rose on the left side of the front panel. They were almost a duplicate to my first pair. As I was putting on the shoes she had put out, she knocked on the door.

"Ready for your hair to be styled?" she asked. After, we fixed bacon and French toast for breakfast. It was nicer weather so we played outside some in the afternoon. She called my Dad and got permission for me to stay for dinner. After dinner we watched television. Mrs. Adams served pie and ice cream about 7:00. I helped her wash up the desert dishes. She took advantage of the time to talk with me.

"Well, Jamie, I promised your Dad I would send you home by 8:30. So I wanted to talk with you before you had to change clothes. The girls really seem to like have you, that is Jamie, around. They talked about it all last week and yesterday evening, after you left. They asked me if you could be Jamie every weekend. I told them that it was up to you. I like having you around. You seem to like helping in the kitchen. I hope that will rub off on my girls. If you'd like, and I think that you do like it, Jamie can come early every Saturday and Sunday. She can stay as late as you want her to. I'll see to it that you look as much like a girl as you can. That way, you won't have to be confined to the house or back yard. I know how the girls like to play Jacks and board games on the front porch."

With that invitation, it became a habit. I was there every Saturday and Sunday before 9:00 in the morning and as often as not stayed until 9:00 at night. During Thanksgiving break, I even included the Friday after Thanksgiving. Shirley was there. She didn't know that it had become a regular thing for Jamie to spend the day. She totally tripped out.

"Whoa…” she said as she came into the kitchen on Friday morning. "Jamie? Is that you? What are you doing here?"

"Helping get breakfast."

"No, I mean, ... Why are you Jamie? Or... or how did you... No. Whoa. I thought you would just be Jamie just for that one weekend. Milt hasn't... at least I don't think he has."

Mrs. Adams laughed. "Sit down Shirley. I guess the girls didn't warn you that Jamie's visits are a regular thing these days. She's here every Saturday and Sunday just like clockwork."

That day was really fun. Shirley was up to her usual mischief. When she found out that no one was at my house, she dared me to go home in a dress. I had to bring back something to prove I had been there. So here I was out on the street wearing a dress. I was scared to death, but I wasn't about to back down form a dare. I thought for sure that someone would notice me. My fears were unfounded. There wasn't anyone on the street. Only one car drove by and it came from behind.

At the house, I went in and stood behind the door and caught my breath. It was as though I had been running. My heart was pounding. I had been walking down the street in a dress. The excitement level was unreal. Suddenly I was aware that I had to go to the bathroom bad. I hurried in, but I wasn't in such a need that I forgot that I was supposed to be a girl. I dutifully backed up to the commode and hiked up my dress and pulled down my panties. Holding my dress high so as to keep off the toilet seat, I sat down.

I needed something to prove I was here. I went to my room and rummaged around. I came up with a current issue of "Games" magazine. I went to the front door and opened it a crack. I peaked out the door. No one was on the street. Quickly, I started out for Angela's house. I no more than got even with the neighbors property line and she pulled up. I couldn't avoid coming within about five feet of her as she went into her house. She looked a me and smiled, nodded her head as she said "Good morning," in a cheery voice. Just like she meant it. I just smiled and nodded.

When I reached Angela's, the girls were waiting outside for me. As I walked up on the porch, I began laughing uncontrollably.

"Did you do it?" Kim asked. I handed her my magazine. Still, I giggled and laughed out loud.

"What's so funny?" asked Shirley as she looked over Kim's shoulder to verify that the magazine came from my house. With considerable effort, I calmed down enough to tell them about my neighbor smiling and saying, "Good morning."

After lunch, Shirley suggested that we go for a walk around the neighborhood. We took off in the opposite direction from my house. Kim and Angela had lived here less than a year themselves and weren't really familiar with the neighborhood. It became a walk of exploration. We went about four blocks and on a whim, we turned toward the freeway. The road went up a slight grade. In two blocks, we were forced to make a choice of either left or right. We turned left again. The road paralleled the freeway for about two blocks and then angled away from it as the side of the road became a steep hill. We couldn't see any houses on the up hill side of the street.

We came to a set of cement steps going up the hill. They disappeared into a stand of trees about half way up the hill. There weren't any driveways near by, so we figured that they couldn't go to a house anywhere. We decided to find out just where they went.

At the top of the hill, we found ourselves in a small park. There was a swing set with six swings, some monkey bars, and a horizontal ladder. There was also a pommel horse, some rings, teeter totters and a slide. It was cute little park. It backed right up against the freeway. From the way it was laid out, it was obvious that the main entrance had been on the freeway side and was now blocked off by it. There was only one picnic table left and no rest rooms. We each took a turns on the slide and spent some time in the swings.

We wanted to explore the neighborhood some more so we left. We went on past the park until the street curved back to the right. Three blocks later we turned left again. Two blocks more and we turned left and went another block. We found ourselves in sight of my house. Shirley wanted to see where I lived. So for a second time I was in my house wearing a dress.

It was getting late so I insisted that we leave quickly. We were laughing and giggling as we walked up the street. My neighbor came out of the house and looked straight at us. I could swear, she was looking at me in particular.

"Good afternoon, girls," she said as she climbed into her car and drove off.

"That was her," I told them. "She's the one that said 'Good morning.' to me.

"She acted like you were a girl," Shirley said. "I'd say you could fool her anytime you wanted. It might be a good idea to not let her see you as a boy. You know, just in case."

I stayed for dinner that night. As was my custom, I kept the panties on until Saturday morning when I changed into fresh ones. I got home just in time for bed. I informed my Dad that Angela's cousin was visiting and I'd be going up there early the next day. "So you won't be doing anything unusual then? Are you sure that they don't mind feeding you every weekend?"

"No, I'm sure they don't mind. Mrs. Adams said told me that I was welcome to come as early as I wanted and stay as late as you would let me."

"Well OK. But if that's not exactly right and I hear anything to the contrary, I'll consider that a lie and deal with it accordingly."

"I'm sure it's exactly right."

"OK, I guess I'll see you tomorrow just in time for bed, huh?"

"I guess so."

On Saturday, I was up before Dad and got to Angela's before 8:00. As usual, Mrs. Adams had laid out a dress and lingerie for me on her bed. The dress was a soft red -- a rose color she said -- with white lace. It buttoned up the back and had cap sleeves and a sash belt that tied behind the back. I had to have her help me button it and tie the belt. My arms just wouldn't bend right to do it all myself. Mrs. Adams did her usual job in the bathroom.

We did our usual magic in the kitchen. The girls showed up just in time to eat. It was an unusually warm day. We decided to play in the park after lunch. Until then, we played outside in their back yard. When we arrived at the park, we raced for the big slide. It was really a lot more fun than the one in the girl's back yard. After the slide, we paired up on the teeter totter. Shirley insisted on being my partner. She kept trying to get a look up my dress. So I responded by being obvious about trying to look up hers. When she "got careless," I did likewise.

She seemed to really get a kick out of seeing my panties. I figured it was the novelty of a boy in a dress wearing panties. What I didn't understand, was that she seemed to get just as much kick out of my seeing hers. It was like, because I was wearing panties, I was in some kind of secret club that allowed me to see up her dress. When we were climbing on the monkey bars, she made a point either being directly below me and looking up or being directly above me and calling me by name so I would look up. After I would look up, she would stand up straight and sway back and forth. Then, she would look down and grin.

Then some girls that Kim knew from school came to the park. I was a little concerned. Kim took the lead and introduced Shirley as her cousin and me as Shirley's friend. A cleaver way to avoid lying. I was, after all, Shirley's friend as much as I was anyone else’s. Kim's friends were really nice. We got along famously. They gave no hint that they thought I was anything but a girl.

Sunday morning it was raining, but I was treated to a special treat. Mrs. Adams had laid out a yellow chiffon dress with petticoats and a pair of white shear tights. She coached me on how to put on the tights. I fell in love with the tights. They were heavenly on my legs. And the petticoats. The way they made the dress stand out and the rustle when I walked was delicious. Because of the rain, we stayed inside. Mrs. Adams gave us a tea party in the afternoon. We had tea and some little cakes that she made. The other girls had on special dresses too. It was so neat. It made me feel like I had been ushered into some private sorority.

When school broke for Christmas break, my Dad gave me permission to stay up until 10:00. That meant that I would be gone from 8:00 a.m. until 10:00 p.m. Dad always went to bed by 9:30. He worked from 6:30 till 3:30 and he had an hours commute each way. That meant he was in bed before I got home and gone before I got up. I decided to get brave. He had been in bed for four nights running so I wore a dress home and borrowed a nightgown from Angela. That way I was able to spend five days, without wearing any boys clothes. On Friday night and Saturday night, I had to wear my clothes home. But it was great to be in a dress from the time I got up until, I went to bed. And then to sleep in a satiny nightgown.

The Saturday after Christmas, I found dad still up when I got home. "Dad, Mrs. Adams invited me to spend the night New Years Eve. Is it OK?"

"Where will you sleep?"

"She said that the girls can share a bed and I can sleep in the other bed."

"Have her call me and we’ll see."

Sunday Mrs. Adams did just that and convince my dad that everything would work out fine. So on New Year’s Eve, I was up early. I put on Angela’s dress waited impatiently in my room until I heard dad’s car start. I put on the coat and headed out the door in time to see dad turn the corner on the main street two blocks away. As I approached Angela's house, I realized it was still 5:00 in the morning. So I went to the park. It was the first time I had been any more then half a block without some one to run interference for me. I found it exciting. After it got light, I walked the same course as I had with the girls on our walk of exploration. As I came by our house, the neighbor lady was just leaving for work. She smiled and said, "You’re out early this morning.” I smiled and nodded. "You spend a lot of time with the girls up the street don’t you?” I was caught, I had to speak.

"Yes ma’am," I said softly.

"You have a pretty dress on today. But then you always have pretty dresses on when ever I see you. Your very lucky to wear such nice feminine clothes.” With that, she winked at me as she got in her car. Did she know? She smiled and waved as she drove off. Well no matter, if she did, she didn’t seem to care.

That night was really cool. At 9:30 we all got in to nightgowns, even Mrs. Adams, and began watching movies. I had never seen a girl, except my sister in a nightgown before. At midnight, we all went out on the front porch and banged pots and pans with a spoon. We yelled "Happy New Year!" at the top of our lungs. Then we went into bed. In the morning I was first up after Mrs. Adams. As usual, we cooked breakfast for the girls.

School started the following Monday, and we went back to the regular routine of me coming over on Saturday day morning and dressing up before the girls got up. One Saturday Mrs. Adams called my dad and got permission to take me to a drive-in movie. That was really neat. That is right up until I had to go to the bathroom. Mrs. Adams took me into the women’s restroom. I was as nervous as a cat. She coached me on just how to act. I went straight to a stall and closed the door. I turned around and lifted my skirt and pulled down my panties. Sitting on the pot I remembered how much fun this was when we were at home. Here, however, I was scared to death that some one would realize I was a boy in the most private place girls have. Fortunately, I was able to get in and out without incident.

The weekends were a blur of dresses and lingerie. Before I knew it April was coming up and we were looking forward to Spring Break. One Saturday in March Mrs. Adams asked. "Would you girls like to go to the beach over Spring Break?"

"Yes, yes, yes!" Kim and Angela shouted in unison.

"What about you, Jamie? Wouldn’t you like to go to beach?"

"Well … You mean I’m included? Yes, can I really?"

"Yes and yes. You are included and you can really. I just got off the phone with your dad. He said that he was concerned that you might make a pest of yourself up here during Spring Break like you did Christmas. I assured him that you were no pest, but a welcome guest. He asked me if you had pressured me to go. I explained to him that I hadn’t told the girls of my plans yet. I wanted to get permission for you to go before I asked you so that if he said ‘No,’ you wouldn’t be disappointed.” We were all ecstatic. It was all we could talk about for the remainder of March and April.

We went to the beach, leaving Friday right after school. Of course, I went as Jamie. The motel room we had was really a separate cabin — the only one, all the rest were regular motel rooms. It sat out on a point with a view both north and south along the coast. Out the front of the cabin, was the main beach. Several miles of sand and rocks. Out the back, was a small cove with calmer waters and a small crescent shaped beach. There was a stairway down to the cove that was directly out our back door. We girls were in the water of the cove Saturday morning before 10:00 while Mrs. Adams watched from the shore line. I was wearing one of Angela’s swimsuits. It was yellow and had a little pleated, white skirt that just covered my groin, but didn’t quite cover my bottom. The top came up kind of high in the front and the wide straps went over the back and crossed, buttoning on either side with large white buttons.

During lunch, Angela was looking at me intently. "That swimsuit doesn’t fit you right. It’s too baggy up here,” she said, patting her chest. I looked down and it did kind of fit loose across the chest. Mrs. Adams looked with a critical eye.

"Angela, you’re right. It doesn’t fit right,” Mrs. Adams said. “Let’s see what we can do about that.” She thought for a minute and said. "I know just the thing.” With that she went into the kitchen and pulled some thing out of the garbage. "I found this on the beach. It’s in such bad shape, I was going to throw it away.” It was a yellow Nerf ball. It was pretty ragged. She sat it on the cutting board and squished it flat. Then she took a knife and sliced a piece off it. Turning it around, she repeated the process. The threw the middle piece back in the garbage and began trimming the remaining pieces. Soon, she had two tear drop shaped pieces of foam rubber, flat on one side and round on the other.

"Here, take down the top of your swimsuit.”

I unbuttoned the straps and pulled it forward. There was a little built-in bra in the top. The pieces she made fit nicely in it. Reaching in her purse, she produced a needle and thread. With a few quick stitches, she fastened the foam rubber into the bra. When I pulled the suit up and buttoned it again, it did fit better. Instead of being baggy across the chest, it stood out just a little. It gave the same appearance that I got when I wore Angela’s padded training bra.

After that, we were in the water again. The cove was about 100 yards across and a rock formation formed a natural break water, causing the swells to be greatly diminished in the cove. We were exploring some rocks on the far side of the cove when we noticed that a family with two girls was on the beach with Mrs. Adams. The parents were talking with her. The girls were pointing at us and shortly came running down the beach toward us. We watched them approach. They came running up and the younger one, about 8, announced that "our mother" said they could play with us.

"Shelly!" the older one said, who was we found out later is 11 (almost 12) said. "You’ll have to forgive her, she’s only 8. I’m Karin, she’s Michelle, but we call her Shelly. We’re staying in the motel this week. We were in the cabin right up there last year. That’s how we know about this cove."

Angela took the lead and introduced Kim and me. She explained that Kim was her sister and I was a friend who lived down the street. At first I was nervous, but soon got over that when it became apparent that Shelly and Karin accepted me as a girl, without reservation. We played and splashed in the water all afternoon About six, Mrs. Adams called us to come out of the water and go up to dinner. I was nervous as I met Mr. and Mrs. Peterson, Shelly and Karin’s mom and dad. My fears were unfounded. They were all smiles and seemed genuinely glad that their girls had found some friends at the beach.

I put on a halter top and a thing Mrs. Adams called a "skort.” It was like a short skirt with an elastic waist and built in brief shorts. We play out on the motel lawn after dinner and Shelly and Karin came over. Mrs. Adams was sitting on a lawn chair enjoying the view and the cool breeze. Mr. and Mrs. Peterson join her after a while. It seemed that they were becoming friends as well.

As we were getting ready for bed Mrs. Adams told us that Shelly and Karin lived just about five miles across town from us. There were two bedrooms in our cabin. Angela and Kim took the one with the double bed and I took the one with a twin bed. Mrs. Adams slept on the sofa-sleeper in the living room.

While we were at the beach, I wore the swimsuit most often during the day. The big exception was when we were invited to go to the movies with the Petersons. Then, I wore a blue dress over a half slip (I really like wearing a slip and do so often when I don’t need to), of course there were the ever present panties that Mrs. Adams always loaned me. I also wore white knee socks and some patent leather flats.

The Petersons took us all out to dinner after the show. We went to a really nice restaurant. At the end of the week, Kim and Angela exchanged phone numbers with Shelly and Karin. They wanted mine, but I didn’t think it was a good idea if they called my house and asked for "Jamie.” So I told them that I was at Angela and Kim’s so often that they might just as well call me there.

When we got back, it was a real let down to have to change back to my own clothes. I put on a pair of jeans and a shirt that we had left on Mrs. Adams bed. (All my clothes had been dumped out of my suit case unceremoniously on her bed and hastily refilled with Angela’s extra clothes for me to wear.) I stuffed the remainder of them back in my suitcase haphazardly. That lent to the realism of the idea that I had actually worn them.

The first thing dad wanted me to do when I got home was to take a bath. While I was in the shower, dad came in and to shave, it was his custom to shave the night before so that he didn’t have to in the morning. He had a light enough beard, that he could get away with it. Apparently, I had my head under the shower nozzle when he came, because I didn’t know he was there. I turned off the water and opened the shower door. I reached out and got a towel from the rack. I quickly dried the excess water from my body and began seriously working on my hair as I stepped out of the tub with the towel over my head. Bending over I pulled my hair, which was getting quite long now, forward and began to dry it in earnest. As I finished, I flipped it back over my head. It was then that I realized that my dad was in the bathroom.

"That’s quite a tan, you’ve got there. Turn around and let me see it,” he said with a strange look on his face. My thoughts racing, I slowly turned around. It was then, that I noticed my arms and legs were tan while my chest and stomach were white as the driven snow. "James? Why is it that you back is tanned and your chest isn’t and why is there a white X on your back that isn’t tanned?"

I hadn’t thought about my tan. I had been almost always in the swimsuit at the beach. "Well, um, I, ah, I forgot to pack my swimsuit. I could hardly keep from crying when I told Mrs. Adams. She pointed out that out the back of our cabin was set of stairs down to a secluded beach. No one would see us going to and from and the stairs were hidden from the rest of the motel by our cabin. She thought it would be all right if I wore Angela’s spare swimsuit. I really wanted to go swimming, so in desperation, I tried it on. I did fit OK. She convinced me that no one would ever know."

"So, you wore a girl’s swimsuit all week last week, huh? I’ll bet that you took a lot of teasing from the girls."

"Oh they called me Jamie, but it wasn’t that bad."

"I hope the girls won’t say anything to anyone about it."

"Don’t worry, Mrs. Adams made them promise not to. She’ll kill them if anyone finds out."

"Well you had better not let any of your friends at school see that tan line or you will see what teasing really is."

I went back to our regular routine. Every weekend I was up at the Adams’ house early and came home late. Of course, I was wearing dresses as usual. Summer was quick in coming. On June fifth, school was out. Then I was at Angela and Kim’s full time. I wore panties everyday all day and went back to my 10:00 bedtime. That meant that I went back to sneaking home in dress Sunday through Thursday and sleeping in a nightgown.

At the end of June, Mrs. Adams told me that they were going to a mountain lake for two week vacation starting the Saturday before the Fourth of July.

"Of course you’re invited to go along. The cabin belongs to the girls uncle. So there won’t be any cost involved. I’ve already talked to your dad. He said it would be OK."

On Thursday evening I went home early to "pack.” As I was going in to "pack" dad reminded me. "Be sure to pack your swimsuit, unless of course you like wearing Angela’s,” he said with a twinkle in his eye.

I got brave for a minute. "Well, actually, I did kind of like it. It was lined with nylon and felt really good. Kind of exciting."

"You liked wearing her swimsuit?" he asked with a chuckle in his voice.

"Well, yeah. Sort of," I admitted sheepishly.

Dad was outright laughing. "Maybe you should have asked Angela if you could borrow a dress too," he teased.

"Well actually, she offered me one."

"She did?" dad was laughing uncontrollably now. When he calmed down he managed to continue between snickers. "You didn’t take her up on it did you?"

"Ah," I wanted to lie but couldn’t bring myself to do it. Omitting some of the truth, as I had done already, was bad enough. Early childhood training will get you every time. "I kind of had too."

"What?" dad asked, getting serious. "What do you mean, you ‘kind of had to’?"

"Well the beach wasn’t quite as private as Mrs. Adams thought. On Sunday afternoon, some other people came down and thought I was a girl. I was so embarrassed I couldn’t correct them. Angela told the other girls my name was Jamie. I didn’t know what else to do. I was going to pretend to be sick the rest of the week and stay in the cabin. But Mrs. Adams told me that if I did that the girls couldn’t go swimming either, because she’d have to go along with the story and stay in and take care of me.

"While we were having this discussion, the parents of the other girls came by and invited us all to come down to the beach after dinner and roast marshmallows with them while we watched the sunset. It was a good thing I hadn’t changed out of the swimsuit yet. Of course Angela and Kim wanted to go and pleaded with their mother. She just looked at me and said ‘Well Jamie, what do you think? Can we all go?’ Then the girls pleaded with me, calling me Jamie again. So I relented and said we could go. I didn’t want to put a damper on their fun.

"It turned cool after dinner and we couldn’t wear our damp swimsuits out so Mrs. Adams got me some of Angela’s clothes to wear. She gave me a thing called a ‘skort.’ It’s like a short skirt, kind of like the skirt that was on the swimsuit, with a built-in pair of brief shorts. For a top she gave me halter top. Mrs. Adams loaned me a pair of sandals that were all straps and buckles so she could adjust them to my feet. She combed my hair back and put some barrettes in it. She said that if I was going to pretend to be a girl, I needed every advantage."

"So you had to go to a marshmallow roast as a girl. I’ll bet you felt uncomfortable."

"Well it got worse from there. Of course I had to wear the swimsuit to swim. But on Wednesday, we got invited to go to the movies. For that, I had to put on a real dress… complete with a slip and training bra. This time, I wore lacy socks and a pair of girl’s flats. After the movie, nothing would do but that we go to dinner. At a real restaurant."

"So, let me get this straight; you spent the whole week pretending to be a girl?" I nodded my head. "And no one even guessed that you weren’t?"

"No, no one."

"How many times did you wear a dress?"

"Three in all. The rest of the time was mostly in the swimsuit. I did wear some shorts and blouses in the evening."

Why did you have to wear a dress three times?’

"Well, I was wearing so much of Angela’s clothes we had to go the Laundromat on Thursday to wash her clothes. And then we checked out before the other girls family so I had to wear a dress on the way home."

"You wore you own underwear right?"

"At first I did, but then the girls dared me to wear panties. They said I was a chicken if I didn’t. So starting Wednesday, I wore panties.” I could tell small lies after all.

"Do the girls still tease you about pretending to be a girl for a week?"

"Well actually, they say I’m more fun as ‘Jamie’ then James.” At this point, I hung my head. In for penny, in for a pound. "I let them talk me into doing it some more here at home."

"What does their mother think of that?"

"Well she helps pick out the outfits and does my hair. My feet are to big to wear Angela’s shoes, so she lends me hers."

"How many times have you dressed up as a girl since you got back?"

"A lot."

"You wear panties when you do?"

I shrugged. "It goes with the outfit."

"Why don’t you tell them you don’t want to?"

"Ah, I, ah, ah… I like it."

"You like it?"

"Yeah, it feels really neat,” I said, looking up. "I, I can’t explain it but it just feels good."

"Do you wish you were a girl?"

"No, I just like to wear the clothes."

"I’m not sure if I like you dressing up like that. I’ve heard about men who do that. I’ve always thought I was pretty opened minded. I always defended peoples right to do what ever they wanted to, so long as it didn’t hurt anyone else, but this is my own son. I’ll have to think about whether or not you can even go on the vacation. In the mean time, don’t bother packing. If I decide to let you go, it sounds like you won’t be needing any of your own clothes."

"But dad, we’re leaving early Saturday morning. I’m supposed to spend the night tomorrow so we can leave early."

"I’ll let you know by morning.”

I didn’t sleep well the night. I kept dreaming that I watched Angela and Kim drive off and never come back. Each time I dreamed that, I woke up in a cold sweat and couldn’t go back to sleep. In the morning, I heard dad down in the kitchen. I got up and went down.

"Oh. Good morning,” he said. "I was going to come up to your room. I have to talk to you about your trip to the lake.” He pulled out a chair at the table and indicated I should sit. I thought it was time to kiss vacation goodbye and to be forever banned from Angela and Kim’s.

"If, and it’s a big if," he started. "If I let you go, your going to wear Angela's clothes again, aren’t you?"

"Probably."

"Are you sure you can get away with pretending to be a girl again?"

"I think so. Mrs. Adams will make sure I really look like a girl."

"When you dress up here, does she make sure that you really look like a girl?"

"Yes."

"Has anyone but the Adams seen you here at home?” I shook my head yes. "Who?" he asked?

"The neighbor next door and some friends of Kim’s.”

"The neighbor didn’t recognize you?"

"No.” Well, maybe she did but if she did, she didn’t care.

"And Kim’s friends, they thought you were a girl?"

"Yes."

"After the mountain lake, do you think you’d like to dress up again?"

"I guess."

"Well, I don’t know what I could do to insure that you’d never wear girls clothes again. It’s really tough for me to deal with this. I want your promise that I will never hear anyone say ‘Hey, I saw you son in a dress,’ OK?"

"You won’t Mrs. Adams doesn’t want to have anyone ask, ‘Who was that boy in a dress I saw your girls with.’ She’ll make sure that I look enough like a girl to fool anyone."

"Well, I maybe crazy, but go on and have fun at the mountain. And after the mountain, be sure that no one ever suspects that you’re not a girl when you’re dressed. Try to keep a low profile."

I could tell that dad really didn’t feel good about it, but he was a realist. He knew that since I liked doing it, even if he were to forbid it, I was going to do it again. He might just as well let me do it where I had supervision.

I went up to Kim and Angela's after I put on the dress I had hidden in my closet. I was so excited I had to go back to get my empty suitcase so we could pack it. Mrs. Adams was surprised when she opened it to pack Angela's clothes for me. I told her about my conversation with my dad. She was relieved that he was OK with it. She had been living in fear that he would find out and be angry with her. I did tell her that while I couldn’t bring myself to lie, I did let him think that it had started at the beach because I didn’t bring a swim suit.

I was to spend the night and so we could leave early in the morning. So I got to sleep in Kim’s bed that night and of course in a nightgown. So in the morning dressed in summer dresses, we headed out before breakfast. We stopped along the way to get breakfast and lunch. We got to the cabin about 4:00. We quickly changed into our swimsuits and hit the water. There was a boat dock with a raised platform on one end so we could jump or dive into the water. I had a ball. I spent two full weeks wearing only girls clothes. On the first Saturday, we went into town for supplies and took in a movie. Everyone in town commented on how well behaved, or how cute we girls were. No one even guessed that we weren’t all girls.

The next Saturday, Shirley’s family showed up. They had the cabin for the next two weeks. Shirley made a big fuss about how glad she was to see me. She "accidentally" let me see her underwear while she was standing on the porch. Then she winked at me. She went into the cabin to change into her swimsuit she left the window shade up and then it with a flourish closing it, after she had stripped down to her panties and bra. I hadn’t noticed that the shade was up until she made fuss closing it. And then she didn’t get it all the way down. It was as if she was inviting me to peep. I resisted the urge, because I didn’t want anyone to catch me and jeopardize my privilege to dress up.

They set up a tent for us girls to sleep out there for the night. Shirley was in charge of putting sleeping bags in the tent. She thought two would be enough. Kim and Angela shared one sleeping bag and Shirley insisted on sharing one with me. Shirley kept giggling about her parents letting her sleep with a boy. I woke up several times that night. Each time Shirley was wrapped around me like a tortilla around a burrito. In extracting my self, I noticed that her nightgown was pulled up well above her waist, much higher then mine. I think Shirley was getting a real thrill by the close contact. I know I was, but I was too scared to do anything to facilitate it.

We left Saturday right after breakfast. We stopped for lunch on the way. We got home about 7:00. Mrs. Adams called dad and told him we were home and that she would send me home after supper. We finished eating about 9:00 and I insisted on helping with the dishes. I wanted to be sure that dad was in bed when I went home. After all, I hadn’t brought any boy’s clothes.

Dad said nothing more about vacation or dressing. He, I’m sure, was well aware that I was wearing Angela's clothes. When the invitation came, he didn’t hesitate say it was OK to go with Kim and Angela to their family Labor Day picnic. He had to work on some project at work over the holiday and couldn’t make any plans for us. We were going to a nearby state park with a lake to swim in.

Dad apparently, thought I would be there as James, because he decided to come over to the park after work. We were on our way back from the lake when I saw dad walking up to Mrs. Adams. I just kind of led the way around the edge of the crowd to avoid being seen by dad. I didn’t really have a plan. But I was sure that dad didn’t know it was Jamie at the picnic. I was close enough to hear them talking.

"Hello Mr. Lawton, I didn’t think you were coming."

"Well, I wasn’t going to, but on the way home from work I got to thinking about how little time I spend with my kids and felt a little guilty. My oldest is away at college and her brother went into the service last June. I’ve only got one at home. So I thought I’d just invite myself. I hope you don’t mind."

"Of course not. We were just about to eat and we have plenty. We were just waiting for the girls to get back from swimming. Oh there they are now," she said pointing right at us. "There’s Jamie, Kim and Angela.” Dad did a double take.

"Well, ‘Jamie’, are you going to just stand there, or are you going to come over and say ‘Hi’ to your dad?"

I walked over and looked at him. "Hi dad," I said softly.

"Well, are you having fun?"

"Uh-huh."

"Everyone," Mrs. Adams said. "Let’s eat."

Dad sat next to me at the end of a table. He leaned close to me and said softly. "I was a little surprised to see ‘Jamie’ here. I didn’t think Mrs. Adams would chance it with her family around."

"Well she kind of had to. Some of Angela's cousins already saw me as Jamie up at the lake."

After lunch, Mrs. Adams told me that the other girls had gone to the camper to change out of their wet suits and suggested that maybe I should too.

"It’ll be crowded up there. Why don’t I brush out your hair for you and you can change when I’m through."

"OK,” I said. Dad watched as she brushed my hair back and styled it. She pulled the sides back and put a big barrette in the back. After that she brushed the hair from the barrette in with the rest of my hair and got the ends to flip up just a little.

"Doesn’t Jamie’s hair look cute this way?" she asked.

"It does. I’ve never seen it cuter," Dad agreed.

Just then the other girls came piling out of the camper. I went in and put on the dress I had come in. I also put on my lace cuffed socks and the flats. I gathered my courage. Dad had already seen me in a girl’s swimsuit, but now he had to see me in a dress. I slowly opened the door and stepped out. Dad was standing next to Mrs. Adams. He looked up and just looked. I looked back. Finally he smiled. I went over to him and hugged him. He hugged back. "Jamie, you’re a very good looking girl," he told me. Just then, Angela called me from the desert table.

"Jamie, they have some really good rhubarb pie here."

I went over and helped myself to some pie. Dad watched me the rest of the afternoon. I got used to him being there and he got used to me in a dress. It did feel a little strange getting into the car with dad and riding home.

When we got home we went inside. Dad picked up the phone and asked, "What kind of pizza do you want me to order for dinner?"

"Ah, mushroom, black olive and sausage," I replied and turned to go up to my room.

"Would you make a pot of coffee while I order the pizza," he asked as he dialed the phone.

I went into the kitchen and put on the coffee he asked for. As I turned away from the pot he was standing in the door looking at me. He had kind of a silly look on his face. "You know, if I didn’t know it was you, I’d swear you were a real girl. Your hair is so perfect. You just look like a girl. I knew you’d never be a jock. You’re too slight built. But I would never have believed that you’d make such a convincing girl. I can see that I don’t have to worry about anyone recognizing you as my son. The worst that could happen is that some one would accuse me of having an illegitimate daughter. You look so much like your sister a few years ago that it’s uncanny."

I began to feel a little uncomfortable again. "I guess I should get changed before the pizza gets here."

"Oh don’t bother. It was obvious watching you today, that you really enjoy this dressing up thing."

"But the pizza delivery has been here before. Aren’t you afraid that he will recognize me?"

"I wouldn’t have picked you out if Mrs. Adams hadn’t pointed you out. Besides, it’s been months since we’ve had pizza delivered. It probably won’t even be the same delivery person. Even if it is he would have to have an incredible memory to remember what kids were in what house."

I went and hugged him again. We had pizza and watched television together. That is something we hadn’t done in months. About 9:00 he said "Why don’t you get ready for bed while I dish up some ice cream?"

I went to my room and got undressed. I looked wistfully in my drawer. I had planned on wearing the blue nylon nightgown. I reached for my boy’s pajamas, but stopped. I had just spent the afternoon and evening with my dad in a dress and now I was going to give up the idea of wearing a nightgown to bed, because he was going to see me? I bucked up my courage and put on the nightgown. I went back to the kitchen for my ice cream. Dad just smiled at me.

"You’re really into this, aren’t you?"

I grinned between bites. "Yes. I really like the nightgowns."

School started the next day. As usual, I went to Angela and Kim’s. I wore my dress home. Dad was still up when I got there. I went to my bedroom and found a sack from a woman’s store. Dad had left a note on it. "No one should have to wear borrowed underwear.” It read. Inside were a dozen pair of nylon panties in pastel colors. There were some with embroidery, some with lace and some plain. They were all beautiful to me. I ran down stairs and hugged dad.

"Thank you dad."

"I thought you’d like them,” he said. "I was thinking we should get you out to buy some dresses of your own. I was talking with Mrs. Adams on Labor Day. She told me that she really enjoys having you, ‘Jamie,’ around. But she did admit that you do put a little strain on Angela's wardrobe. How about if old dad takes you shopping tomorrow? Mrs. Adams said she and the girls could come along."

"You mean it?"

"I sure do."


-- finis —

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Comments

Would that life was really that simple

sweet story - I'm sure that the dressing up is really only the tip of the girlberg.

I liked dressing up at that age too - though the chances were few and far between.

I ended up going the whole way - it's who I was - though I never really thought it would be possible when I was 7

More Than Acceptance

littlerocksilver's picture

Patricia,

Very nicely done without all the conflict. I think Jamie's journey is just beginning. Hopefully, she gets all the right help. Maybe a sequel is in order.

Portia

Portia

I second that!

What a beautiful story! Well told, and fun to read. I don't know where you would go from here, but I would read it!

Wren

A Wonderful, Heartwarming Tale

Jamie may not quite appreciate just how blessed he is to be surrounded by so many supportive & encouraging friends & moreover, to have a father who loves him enough not only to accept but even to empower his son's crossdressing, although he yet may disagree with it or otherwise be worried about it. His father giving Jamie his own set of panties is such a very powerful act of love in this story. Mr. Lawton seems to value his son's well-being & happiness above his own private concerns.

The Rev. Anam Chara+

Anam Chara

Patricia, I have been

Patricia, I have been reading your stories for years. You never disappoint me. I see myself in many of your characters. I just wish I had friends like Jamie has when I was little to help me be the little girl I so desperately wanted to be. Danielle

Patricia this is a really good start.

But I would love to see how Jamie's shopping trip with dad, Mrs. Adams and the girls, go. Then what about full time dressing, and eventually going to school dressed as Jamie. Jamie doesn't have to be M2F transsexual, but she can be a girl nevertheless. So please consider continuing this story, because there is a lot that has been left out by the open ending. Thank you for sharing this sweet and sentimental journey of James a boy to Jamie a girl. Being a girl is the best thing in the whole world.

"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."

Love & hugs,
Barbara

"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."

"With confidence and forbearance, we will have the strength to move forward."

Love & hugs,
Barbara

"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."

What next?

I'd imagine dressing en femme (almost) full time would be a start. I'd imagine that at some point in time, Paula will return for a visit - Paula meeting Jamie for the first time could be an interesting scene.

As far as schooling goes, that would be more tricky. To attend school in female attire would require medical certification, so he'd have to have some visits to a psychologist. Even if he's not TG, a situation might arise in future where they can write a note along the lines of attending school in male attire would cause severe emotional distress. Until then, he'd almost certainly have to wear the male uniform, but would probably be treated as an honorary girl by Kim and Angela, and might be able to get a PE exemption, which would reduce the chances of being bullied (as the changing rooms would be one of the few places he wouldn't have Kim and Angela in the vicinity).

So, if you were ever had the motivation and time to write a sequel, there's a potential springboard.

 

Bike Resources

There are 10 kinds of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't...

As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

What a Lovely Story!

I wish my childhood could have been like that! I would have loved it just as much!

Diane

consensual - that's the best way

Lovely writing - I agree with others... please continue and develop the open ending. Dad's involvement is interesting...... unusual, for sure, but a welcome thought that this might be real..... Could Dad be 'in the closet'??? (after all, it is a BIG closet!)

You get my vote! love Ginger xx

A lovely tale. ^_^

Extravagance's picture

It leaves me worried about Jamie's future though. What's going to happen if he starts developing male secondary characteristics?

Catfolk Pride.PNG

I just eat up these type of stories...

...where fears are unfounded. I've never believed that people were basically good but that there were always exceptions. I can see his dad and mrs adams hitching up. The elements are all there.

If you would, how much of this story is true to life (you did mark it autobiographical)?

Based on my growing up

Patricia Marie Allen's picture

I actually had friends like the ones described in the story. Though none of the cross-dressing elements actually happened. The character of Jamie's dad is based on my own father. Three times, while I was growing up, he was confronted with my cross-dressing and not once did he make an issue of it. The only time he actually said anything about it was when he spotted me coming back into the house he only said that I shouldn't let the neighbors see me because they'd think I was nuts. Just that one sentence and that was it.

Fifteen years later, I was married and still cross-dressing when I simply turned up at his house cross-dressed. He just looked me up and down, shrugged and carried on as if it was a normal visit. After that, I often stopped by to visit fully en femme and he never gave any indication he had a problem with it.

I like to think that had the events in Jamie's life occurred in my life he'd have had a similar reaction.

Hugs
Patricia

Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt

Acceptance, but Bound to be a few bumps

Hypatia Littlewings's picture

Bound to be a few bumps along the way but with dad's support Jamie should be ok.
It's when its the people who should love us don't support us that things are at their worst.
If only acceptance wasn't so hard to come by sometimes.

as long as those two bumps arent

the ones on my chest. I had to get mine reduced <-- spinal issues crippling me.

oh wait! You mean Jamie!

The acceptance part here was the coup de' grace' that endeared this story to my heart ^^

If only real life could be a little more like that...

Sephrena

Ouch!

Hypatia Littlewings's picture

sorry to hear that.

Well those sort of bumps would be ok for Jamie, assuming she wants them, and baring any future problems like yours. It's the bumpy ride kind that will be a problem, There are always bound to be some things can only go so smooth. Hopefully we can all get by with as few as possible.