Joan's Room Chapter 10

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Synopsis:

Joan begins a new career. A shopping trip with Mom ensues.The girls make plans for a birthday party and the two young teens continue falling in and out of love.

Story:

Chapter 10

All the Things I’ve Done Before

Mom was as sweet as could be when I came through the door. We hugged briefly and she asked me if I’d had a good day with Sam. I told her it was the best day ever all the while thinking of the night I’d spent in his arms just a short while ago. I decided I’d better tell her about the ski ball tournament. There was likely to be a story about it in tomorrow’s paper. Of course, she asked me what I was going to do with all the money. I told her I gave Sam half and planned on banking the rest. She looked at me like I was nuts. Even after I explained my agreement with Sam. I only hoped she was as hard on my father when it came time for the property settlement.

I had a fantastic night’s sleep and woke up Tuesday morning ready to face the week. I put on my khaki skort and top and peddled off to work without a care in the world. We all grinned at one another when I entered the shop. I’d never again complain about sanding wood. The day passed rapidly and I found myself on Darla’s front doorstep before I even realized where I was; hoping that Aunt Vivian was home. Thankfully, she answered the door and welcomed me in with a quick hug. "Are you here to see Darla?" She asked me.

"Actually, I was hoping we could talk, if you’ve got some time?" I begged. She ushered me into the kitchen and poured us both a cup of coffee. I relayed the story of my trip to New Jersey. Aunt Vivian told me she was aware. It seems that my mother had called her on Saturday night filled with worry for me. My own estimation of my mother’s abilities grew with each new tale related. She wasn’t likely to crack under pressure as I’d feared. I heaved a huge sigh of relief as I pieced it all together. Had I worried Aunt Mel for nothing?

Finally, she asked me how things had gone overall with my father. I told her of his plan to send me to a military academy and thereby magically make me into some kind of macho man. And, of his seeming disgust with me when he realized that wasn’t going to happen. I finished my tale with him walking away from me wordlessly after handing me my airline ticket; as if he didn’t care what became of me. I hadn’t realized the import of his actions till now. I broke down and wept. Aunt Vivian did her best to comfort me. She told me how difficult this must be for him; losing his only son.

Feelings of self-hatred began to overtake me. I didn’t deserve to live. Aunt Viv sensed what was going through my mind and assured me that it wasn’t my fault. If only I could believe her. We talked for awhile longer. Aunt Viv told me how happy she was for having gone to the ball game. "Your boyfriend is really something else," she beamed at me. I hugged her and thanked her for her time. We mutually agreed that Thursday evening would be best for my next appointment. She told me to call her or just drop by anytime I needed to talk. I pedaled home feeling better about everything.

Wednesday afternoon I found myself wandering down Main Street. I made a $300 deposit in my checking account. If there had been a story about me and my ski ball win, no one had mentioned it to me. I guess I wasn’t worthy of "fifteen minutes of fame." That’s OK, at least I’d know that I’d done it. I wondered if my skills would translate to actual bowling. I’d never been.

Mr. Hospin, true to his word, had lined up a few painting jobs for me. I’d be making more money doing that than I imagined any fourteen year old could. I’m not sure why, but I was determined to save every nickel I could get my hands on. Mr. Ferris paid me as usual on Thursday. There was $90 in my envelope; it should only have been eighty. I told him of his mistake and he apologized for not telling me he was giving me a $10 raise. He stood like a statue when I gave him a quick hug.

My appointment with Aunt Vivian on Thursday evening left me feeling a bit frustrated. I began to wonder just what we were attempting to accomplish. We’d talk about my feelings and how I relate to the world. On occasion, she’d throw me a curve ball. "Where do you see yourself in five years; in ten?" My answer was always the same: as Joan and with Sam. I’m not sure if that’s what she was going for, but she didn’t press the matter. I loved the lady dearly, but this formal arrangement irked me somehow.

Sam’s Saturday game would be out of county. They were playing the Cumberland Clippers. I had no way to get there and, besides, Sam wouldn’t be pitching. There were three starting pitchers on the team and though Sam had had more than enough rest, all players were to be given a chance.

I had my first "paid painting job" on Friday. The Moores seemed more (ha ha) than a bit surprised when I knocked on their door and explained who I was and why I was there. For a moment I thought they were going to send me on my way, that it had all been a big mistake. I calmed them down and told them how lovely their house was, started asking about color selections, and told them a bit about my own expertise. In the end, they let me do the job. They were beyond satisfied with the way it turned out. So was I. For three hours work I had another sixty dollars to sock away.

Another Friday night rolled around and Sam still couldn’t go out. He was home this time, but had a nine o’clock curfew. I couldn’t believe he was taking it that seriously. After all, who’d ever know? Still, he was adamant about obeying the rules. I didn’t pester him about it. It was too important to him. We were sitting in his living room. He finally ran upstairs and came back down with Tuesday’s newspaper. My picture was centered on page one --- of the Arts and Leisure section. He beamed at me when he told me to keep it, that he had another stored safely away. My first thought was to scan the picture and the article and send it to my Dad. Despite all that had happened, I missed him.

In the end, I did scan it and send it, but I sent it to Doreen. We’d exchanged a few emails already. She told me that my father seemed deeply upset about the way things had transpired. I think the only reason that I liked her was that she was going to be the mother of my sister. I’d always dreamed of having a sister. Except now, I was about old enough to be a mother myself, I’d probably never get to see her, and she wouldn’t be my mother’s child. The conflicting emotions could get pretty confusing at times.

I hadn’t talked to Mom again about the situation with Dad. I only hoped that she was doing something about it and not just letting it all slide by. I knew what I’d do. I’d hire an investigator and find out just who owned all those assets. I doubted Dad’s story that they didn’t belong to him.

Saturday rolled around and I went to the beach with Sally and Darla. Darla hadn’t mentioned Sarah in awhile. I wondered if there was trouble in paradise. I’d forgotten just how much fun Sally could be. Time passed easily and quickly in her presence. We gritted our teeth (from the cold) and spent a few hours frolicking in the ocean. A few boys tried to garner our attention but each time they did, Sally would shoo them away, explaining that we were all spoken for. I had no idea that Sally had a love interest. I was so tempted to ask her about it, but I decided that if she wanted to talk, she would.

We ate hot dogs on the boardwalk. We paraded about like we owned the place and that the visitors were only there by our good graces. It wasn’t snobbishness exactly, but more of a "pride of ownership" kind of thing. We walked arm-in-arm-in-arm as we traversed the boards, with Darla at the center. It felt great to finally have some friends. I’d spent my entire life in Sam’s company and his alone. While I wouldn’t trade that for anything, this was different; something special.

"So, what are you doing for your birthday, Joan? Are you having a sleep over?" This from Darla. I honestly hadn’t given any thought concerning birthday celebrations.

"I don’t know. If I did have one would you guys come?" I asked them. The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea. Yet, our house was tiny. We had no swimming pool or fancy anything. Just a modest house, sitting on a modest piece of property. In the end I voiced my opinion about my house’s shortcomings. Both Darla and Sally assured me that I was being ridiculous and that I’d "better" have a party as they both planned to attend. I beamed at them and hugged them both tightly. It was good being me. The rest of the day passed quickly and we said our goodbyes at the entry ramp for Webster Ave.

I offered to walk each of them home. They looked at me like I was nuts. I then told them that I’d be calling about birthday plans tomorrow. There wasn’t much time left. My actual birthday was a week from tomorrow. The short walk home passed in minutes. Somehow I’d managed to get sand inside my suit. I was going to need another bathing suit. I couldn’t make it through the rest of the summer with just the one.

I shouted out to Mom upon arrival, stripped my suit off carefully so as not to get sand everywhere, turned on the shower and luxuriated in the fine spray of warm water. I found myself wondering what Mom was making for dinner. It felt good to have the weekends off from that task. I put on my sundress and full makeup and realized that I needed some more clothing choices too. Oh, and definitely some new earrings. With thoughts like these, I’d never be able to hang on to my money. I laughed to myself as I made my way downstairs.

Mom was busy at her machine. It made me smile every time I saw her there. Just knowing that I could give her this "gift" was far more rewarding than anything I could have ever hoped for. She was working on new curtains for the living room. The only problem was, I didn’t think the colors would match exactly. Mom looked up at me and voiced my thoughts.

"You know Joan, these curtains really are beautiful. But, I don’t think they’re going to match the paint on the walls." I could see where this was headed. "Since you did such an excellent job in here, I was wondering if you’d paint the living room for us?" What could I say?

"Sure Mom, I’d be happy to, but I don’t work cheap. I charge twenty dollars an hour." Where had that last bit come from? Truth be told, I was still a bit angry at being forced to forfeit my allowance. It wasn’t the money. I guess the cash was in some way a symbol of appreciation. Mom laughed at that.

"Well, I’ve been thinking about that," she said. "And no, I’m not going to pay you twenty dollars an hour!" She laughed again. I found myself wondering whether she realized that I was actually making that much. "Still, I am going to reinstate your allowance," she said matter of factly. Had she had it out with Dad? Had she simply realized that money wasn’t as tight as she thought it was? I tried asking what had changed, but I was greeted by a stone wall.

"Mom, you do realize this is going to be a much bigger job than the sewing room, don’t you? The size of the room alone, the hallways, going up the stairs. All the extra trim work. Stair treads, etc. And, you’re going to need five gallons of paint." I said after eyeing the project carefully.

"Five gallons!" She exclaimed.

"Yes Mom, five gallons. Three for the walls, one for the ceiling, and one for the trim. Not to mention new rollers and other incidentals." She smiled at me and hugged me tight. She asked me if I wanted to go to the mall. Said we could get a bite to eat and there were a few things she wanted to get me. Ah! A shopping trip for me! I told her I’d love to go, but I had to call Sam first.

I called him up and asked him how the game had gone against the Clippers. He relayed more information than I wanted to know. "Did you win?" I asked at last.

"Well, it was like this," he went on undeterred. "We had a one run lead going into the bottom of the seventh. Roger told the coach that he couldn’t pitch another inning. I got the first save of my career!" Before I could tell him about going shopping with Mom, he asked me if it was alright if he went out with the guys that evening. I was a bit over enthusiastic when I told him that would be fine. We made arrangements to meet for breakfast tomorrow. We exchanged words of love and said our goodbyes.

I got changed. Pantyhose just didn’t work with the sundress and I was determined to try on some sandals. I put on my blue pleated skirt and decided to give my heels a try. They certainly made my legs look sexy. I walked cautiously downstairs, I felt just a wee bit wobbly in them.

Mom told me I looked beautiful but asked me if I thought wearing high heels to the mall was such a good idea. I smiled at her and told her I wouldn’t be wearing them all evening. I was going to get a pair of proper sandals. She gave me a reasonable nod and we were on our way.

We dined at the Burger Barn. I got more than a few looks from the boys as they passed by. It always made me feel a bit creepy, but part of me secretly liked the attention. Mom took it all in, but said nothing. Our first stop was the Shoe Emporium. I spent forever trying on sandals of every style imaginable. I wanted something both sexy and practical. I finally decided on a pair of wedgies. They were comfortable; fancy but sturdy and the overall height was only two inches. I put my heels in the now empty box and we made our way to the checkout counter. Just as I was reaching for my wallet, Mom took out her charge card and paid for them.

We then made our way to Macy’s. I couldn’t believe it. The swim wear was already fifty percent off. They were beginning to display the fall clothes already. It wasn’t even the middle of July! I picked out two suits. One, blue on blue with a plunging neckline and flared skirt, and another identical to the one I had only in green. Mom said it brought out my eyes. I had no idea how such a thing was possible, but I did like the color. I didn’t even reach for my wallet this time. Mom smiled at me as she placed the items on the counter for purchase.

"OK Joan, September will be here before you know it. What say we take note of the current styles so we know what patterns to buy to make you some new school clothes." Whoa! Where had that come from? I hadn’t given any thought as to what was going to happen come September. Could I really attend school as Joan? Sure, I wanted to; but how? Would I get my ass kicked every day of the week just for being me? I was reasonably sure that I could handle any difficulties that came to pass. I sighed and all such doubts slowly slipped away.

I looked at Mom warily, unsure whether I should say anything. In the end, I didn’t. We went and oohed and ahhed over the latest fall fashions. There were a few cute offerings that caught my eye. Not needing anything else for the moment, we made our way home. I really loved my new sandals. They’d be perfect for strolling the boards. I enjoyed being closer to Sam’s own height, though he seemed to be still growing.

It was closing in on nine o’clock when we arrived home. I asked Mom if it would be OK if I went out for a bit. She said that would be fine but to make sure I was home by ten. She put her cell phone in my purse; just for emergencies. I put the hundred and fifty that I’d earned that week in my drawer and walked to the boards with the crisp twenty that Mom had given me safely tucked in my purse. I soon found myself back in the arcade where the ski ball tournament had been held just a few days ago. I turned a deep shade of crimson when I saw my own picture prominently displayed on the wall beside the machines.

I laughed aloud when I realized that no one would ever pay it any notice. I thought about playing a game, but was reluctant to part with a quarter. Was I that much of a cheapskate? I laughed again, shook my head, and continued walking. I went back out to the boardwalk and bought myself a lemonade. I sipped at it delicately as I continued to wander about. A group of boys up ahead began making catcalls as I approached. Were those intended for me? I almost smiled at them when I heard a familiar voice.

"Leave her alone dickhead!" The voice exclaimed. It seemed Sam and his newfound moronic friends were amusing themselves by taunting girls as they passed by. I stared in disbelief as the group continued. Why Sam would associate with such a group of animals was beyond me. It’s funny: when I thought it was just a group of faceless idiots, I really didn’t care. Now that I knew Sam was among them, I was saddened beyond belief. I turned around and began walking in the opposite direction. A few more lewd suggestions were tossed my way.

I felt his running footsteps vibrate through the boards before I heard them. ‘Joan, wait!" He exclaimed as he grabbed my shoulder and attempted to turn me around. I yanked myself firmly from his grasp and continued walking. He walked silently beside me for quite awhile. "I’m sorry. If I’d known what they were going to do beforehand, I would have left sooner."

"Obviously I wasn’t the first one that they taunted," I said coldly. "Sam, I don’t mind your hanging out with the guys. But traveling around with a bunch of pack animals taking advantage of the weak, well, I thought better of you." I kept walking.

"Sweetheart, you’re right, I won’t ever do that again. It’s only a couple of them that are idiots, the rest are really nice guys. Please forgive me?" He asked as a few errant tears rolled down his cheeks.

"And what happens the next time they start in with that garbage?" I asked, needing to know.

"Darling, if anything like that ever happens again I’ll do my best to put a stop to it. Failing that, I’ll simply walk away. I’ve never been so embarrassed or ashamed in my life." He said with deep sincerity. I believed him. I saw the look on his face and in his eyes when he realized who the target of the taunts was. It only saddened me that he didn’t realize beforehand that it was simply wrong to act that way towards anyone. I caught him off guard and pulled him towards me. I hugged him tight right in the middle of the boardwalk. The group of losers had long ago lost interest in our actions.

We came upon a police officer as we continued on our way and I informed him of the group of rowdy boys taunting almost everyone who walked by. He thanked me for my concern, apologized on their behalf, and promised to look into it. He headed off with a look of determination in their general direction. Sam eyed me like he wanted to say something; in the end, he didn’t. We kept on walking.

"Sam, it’s getting late. I’ve got to be heading home."

"Already? Are you sure you can’t stay out awhile longer?" I opened my purse and removed Mom’s cell phone. Here goes nothing, I thought as I dialed our number.

"Mom!" I said excitedly when she picked up the phone. "I ran into Sam on the boardwalk. Would it be OK if I stayed out till eleven?" I asked in a pleading voice. Finally, realizing all that I’d been through, she relented. She made me promise to be home on the stroke of eleven however. Sam and I would have another hour to spend together.

"What would you like to do?" I asked him.

"Let’s go under the boardwalk and make mad passionate love for the next hour." He said with more seriousness in his voice than I could have imagined. As an alternative I suggested a walk in the breakers. We walked hand-in-hand while the waves gently crashed against our feet. We spoke idly of plans for the future and all the things we hoped to accomplish. Sam seemed impressed when I told him of my new job as a painter of rooms. "You’ll have to come over and paint my room for me," he whispered Finally, we headed for home. We stood outside my front door and kissed for quite some time as the moon bathed us in its faint yellow glow…

Mom was waiting for me when I walked in the front door. I was a few minutes late. She looked at her watch, but didn’t say a word. I sat down next to her and asked her if it’d be alright if I had a slumber party to honor my birthday.

"You and Sam sleeping together?" she stated with a bit of outrage. While I thought that would make for the perfect birthday, I laughed and told her that it would be just me and the girls. I told her that Darla and Sally wanted to come over for an evening next weekend. She knew that Darla wouldn’t be a problem, but she was concerned as to what Sally’s parents would think. I reminded her that Sally had been there at Darla’s party and at last she relented. She insisted on talking to Sally’s parents beforehand though. I sighed aloud. I guess I was both older and younger than I thought. I looked forward to the day when I wouldn’t have to ask anyone’s permission to do anything.

I began to think that maybe I could show them both how to sew a bit. Remembering Darla’s cool attitude about it, I figured there probably wouldn’t be any interest. Still, it was worth a shot. I hugged Mom goodnight and climbed the stairs to my bedroom. I hadn’t even realized I’d spent the evening walking around in my new sandals. They were that comfortable. There was just something about shoes that had me craving more. I loved the way they looked on my feet and how pretty and feminine they made me feel.

Sunday morning arrived and I remembered my date with Sam for breakfast. I guessed it would be OK to part with a few dollars for some decent food. He arrived at ten and we walked hand in hand down Main Street to the local IHOP. The waitress actually asked if we wanted smoking or non-smoking. Before I could say a word, Sam quickly replied: non-smoking. I eyed him with a bit of disappointment and we were escorted to our booth.

Sam had paid for everything last time, this time it was my turn to treat. While we sat there awaiting our food a young couple stopped at our table. "You’re Sam Peters, aren’t you?" the man said. Sam and I both looked up wondering what this was all about. He seemed a bit embarrassed by our expressions. He shuffled his feet and continued. "My wife and I saw you pitch last weekend. I used to pitch in college. I’ve never seen anyone as graceful or with more confidence and control on the pitching mound. I just wanted to thank you for the incredible show you put on."

Sam blushed and thanked him for his kind words. I just sat there staring in awe as the couple walked away from our table. Before he floated away to the ceiling, I said to him: "Sam, do you have any idea who that was!" I said it in such a way that he’d have to assume that I knew and that it was someone quite important. When he meekly replied that he had no idea, I told him, "neither do I." It seemed to work. Slowly but surely his feet were back on terra firma.

We tackled our breakfast with enthusiasm. This time, there’d be no need for a doggie bag. Sam simply ate everything I left on my plate. The bill came and I snatched it away before he could say a word. Twenty bucks for breakfast was a bit stiff (including the tip) but, what could you do?

"I need to walk off some of that food," he said as we exited the building.

"If you didn’t make such a pig of yourself, you wouldn’t be in such pain now," I admonished teasingly.

We walked a few miles that afternoon. From one end of the boardwalk to the other and back again. It was a beautiful summer’s day. I told him of my plans to have a slumber party. He laughed and asked me if my mother was really going to allow him to sleep over. For the first time in a long time I punched his arm playfully. He laughed and told me to be careful; that was the arm that was going to put food on the table. I smiled at his resolve. I only hoped it would be as easy as he seemed to think it would.

"Sam? How about if I have my party on Friday night? You have an early curfew anyway and maybe I could persuade the girls to come to the game on Saturday." It was a day game against the Buford County Blues. I still liked the name of our team the best: The Ocean County Waves. I then asked him if he had any idea how we might celebrate our upcoming birthdays together. He, like myself, hadn’t given it any thought. He promised me he’d get back to me tomorrow on that one. We walked home slowly and kissed goodbye at my front door.

"Joan, you’re home. Good!" My mother exclaimed as I entered the house. "You didn’t make any plans yet for your party, did you?" I told her that I hadn’t and waited for her to continue. Something was obviously up. "Well, I’ve got a date next Saturday night and I can’t have a house full of girls here running around unattended." She blurted out. I explained to her my plan to have my party on Friday night while I found myself wondering just how long she’d be gone on Saturday. Thoughts of sharing my bed with Sam filled my head.

Mom then handed me a color chart with the dusty gray she’d selected circled. She handed me a blank check and told me I could pick up the paint at will. I explained to her that I couldn’t carry five gallons of paint on my bicycle. She laughed at that and told me we could pick it up together tomorrow evening. We sat at the picnic table eating our dinner. I’d barbecued a London Broil for dinner. Yeah, I know, Mom was supposed to cook on the weekends, but somehow the grill work had been assigned to me. In all fairness, she took care of the salads and vegetables. I let her do the clean-up too. It was a fair trade.

After dinner I called Darla and told her of my plans to have the party on Friday night. She actually sounded quite excited about it. I asked her if she wanted to come to the game on Saturday as well. She replied that she hadn’t expected to enjoy the game as much as she had and would simply love to go. My next call to Sally was a much shorter one, but she loved the idea of the Friday night bash followed by the baseball game on Saturday too.

Mom and I spent the rest of the evening in the sewing room. I learned how to make pleats and measure hems. I know it sounds insane, but I loved working under her watchful eye; it really was fun. It was almost eleven. With my eyes drooping and my mouth yawning, I announced that I was headed for bed. I was asleep within seconds of my head hitting my pillow…

Notes:

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Comments

Nice Story

I am enjoying this story very much. I also like the thoughtful commentary by your readers. I am looking forward to the entirety of this world even though I think I've read this previously. It's just very good.

Worried

Several things are happening in this story, not chapter, that are not being addressed. First, no progress has been made on Joan's starting HRT. It is necessary to start sooner rather than later. Second, Joan's mom has not replaced the house locks - keys, bars over the windows, and set up a new alarm system to keep the evil father out with. Third, Sam seems to have so little in common with Joan. I know others have voiced this complaint - I know there is a problem here with it - but nothing is being done to rectify it. Sam needs to have something in common with Joan or the relationship should naturally end. Sam seems to treat Joan as an afterthought strictly by the way Sam is presented through Joan's eyes. Fourth, what about others from Joans school seeing Joan as she bike rides or walks around? no encounters questioning who she is has occurred. It would be wonderful if everyone accepted Joan but I am sure there has to be a monkey out there somewhere to toss a wrench in the works.

The story pace has picked up and the characters are more alive now than ever. With Darla's ability to twist in cliffhanger chapter endings and making us as readers care, I am sure the questions will be answered in the ensuing chapters.

Thank you for another good read Darla

Sephrena

As I've mentioned before ...

Jezzi Stewart's picture

... 37 years teaching Joan's age group leads me to believe that Sam is simply acting like a typical 14 year old boy and his behavior is seen through the eye's of Joan who is behaving and thinking like a 14 year old girl. That she can understand both viewpoints and put them so well on paper is a good measure of author Darla's talent. Congrats, Darla.

"All the world really is a stage, darlings, so strut your stuff, have fun, and give the public a good show!" Miss Jezzi Belle at the end of each show

BE a lady!

The Relationship is at Stake

Jezzi, it is not just the behaviour of Sam, its how Joan is going to percieve the insensitivity over time. Eventually Joan will tire of it and want someone who will understand and meet her needs. It happens. If the relationship between Joan and Sam is going to last, at least feasibly, it needs reinforcement and a lot of give on Sam's part. Darla I am sure has a trick under her sleeve and Sam will get around to his senses. Maybe Joan will have to threaten to leave him before he will change his attitude to Joan and who he hangs around and picks up habits from.

The whole issue is to make Sam care and realize a relationship takes more than saying I love you to make it work. It takes both halves and a comittment to work together. I know i do not see it at present and I am looking for it. Right now Sam and Joan have like a truce. Joan wants to see more in Sam than Sam really sees in her. That is the state of the matter backed up with all that has been written so far. Sam simply does not have at present what it takes to make a relationship last or work. He needs to learn it in a hurry if there is to be a Joan and Sam. I am all for getting Joan and Sam together. Progress is slow but coming. Darla will get us there in the end.

Sephrena

Another great chapter Darla.J

nikkiparksy's picture

Another great chapter Darla.Joan will learn the way we all did at that age you just have too give it time,and i am sure the hormone aspect is just around the corner by now.Looking forward too the next chapter.