Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 859.

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Wuthering Dormice
(aka Bike)
Part 859
by Angharad
  
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Boxing Day–for the uninitiated, the day after Christmas Day, was when servants were given their Christmas boxes or presents by their employers. It has absolutely nothing to do with two full grown men pulverising each other in a square made up of ropes, which they call a ring–it has to be a British invention, and it is in its modern form which are fought to the Queensbury rules. The Marquis of Queensbury was the man who caused Oscar Wilde to be jailed for having a sexual relationship with his son, Bosie.

We had been invited to the hotel at Southsea by Henry and Monica for luncheon and to use the facilities–swimming pool or gym if we wished. The kids were all up for the pool and Simon fancied a workout in the gym. Tom fancied getting shot of the lot of us for a few hours so he could drink his Scotch and sleep afterwards. He’d also get a chance to do one of his curries with some of the left-over turkey. Sort of left-overs and hangovers, each to his ain, I suppose. I bought him a couple of bottles of his uisge beatha (water of life), so I shouldn’t criticise–and what else do you give someone who is seventy, has all he needs and most of what he wants? Obviously–something to eat or drink. Simon gave him a large and very smelly Stilton cheese, which I made him keep in one of the sheds–not my fridge. Hey, it’s only his house, it’s my kitchen.

Stella and the baby, who increasingly resembles a little pudding, are coming with us–so Simon is borrowing Tom’s car, and will take the boys and Stella and Pud, and I’ll take the girls in mine. Should be fun–part of me would rather be home with Tom and chilling out, but I’m a parent now and responsible for half the waifs and strays in Portsmouth by the feel of it. I enjoy having them really, I’m just very tired.

The plan was to get breakfast over with and then do a big clear up from the day before. My role was slave driver in chief, and it never fails to astonish me why everyone else isn’t as motivated as I am.

Simon cleaned out the fireplace, or would have done except it was still alight–the fire, so he stuck a log or two on it and with a bit of encouragement from the bellows fan, got it going again–Tom would be glad of that later.

Trish vacuumed–she’s good at that, Livvie and the boys polished and dusted and Meems helped me in the kitchen putting the pots away. I then mopped the floor and made the oldies a cuppa and drinking chocolate for my child labourers. We disposed of a few mince pies too.

Billy sat alongside me, and I asked him if he was enjoying Christmas. His response was emphatic to say the least.

“W-h-a-t? Oh yeah, Aun’ie Caffy, it’s totally, like brill.”

One day children will speak the same language as their elders, but not at the present time, sadly. However, I did understand some of what he said and I think caught his drift, so to speak.

“How was it different to last Christmas?” I was trying to learn about his past and about him.

“Ten times berrer, easy.”

“What was last year’s like, then?”

“Okay, we got a few prezzies, but like no bike, like you an’ Uncle Si give us.”

“What about the food?”

“We ‘ad turkey, but not like the way you done it. That was totally awesome.”

Maybe I should get this in writing so I can show it to my detractors when they criticise my cooking–as happens from time to time. I usually put down the mutiny by asking the complainants to take over the duties of cook–they always withdraw the complaint–cowards.

“How long have you been in the home?”

“Two years, I fink.”

“What happened to cause that?”

“Me mum started drinkin’ after she split up wiv me dad–he used to ‘it ‘er. She loved ‘im though an’ missed him, I ‘spect. She’d go down va pub and forget about me, va neighbours complained ‘cos I’d be vere on my own, and va council took me inta care–like, ended up at ve ‘ome. Vis is berrer, much berrer, best Christmas I ever ‘ad, fank you Aun’ie Caffy.”

“I’m glad you’ve enjoyed yourself.”

“Me an’ Danny...” he said looking at the floor, finding the carpet suddenly very interesting.

“What about you and Danny?” I knew what was coming but I had to hear him say it, even though I knew I’d reject him.

“We couldn’t like stay ‘ere, could we, like va girls do?”

“I don’t know, Billy–the arrangement was you’d stay until January the fourth, by which time the home was supposed to have found an alternative to you having to go to Wantage. It isn’t in my power to say yes or no–it’s up to the council and the charity who run the home.”

“Well, like Trish was sayin’ vat Livvie was like, stayin’ wiv you when ‘er parents died and she’s still ‘ere.”

“It wasn’t quite like that, Billy, her parents asked us to look after her before they died. The council agreed and that’s why she’s still with us, I’m her official guardian and foster parent.”

“Can you be me an’ Danny’s foster mum or grandian?”

“Guardian–it’s a term used by the courts to designate a suitable person to look after the interests of the child on its behalf.”

“Oh?” his glazed look showed me he hadn’t understood a word of it.

“You didn’t understand, did you?”

“Not really.”

“Okay, the court–that’s a judge, a very wise and powerful man or woman, decides if the person asking to be the guardian or protector of the child, is suitable to do the job.”

“Do vey pay you ven?”

“Not really, they do give some expenses, but it’s never enough to do the job properly. The three girls go to a private school, which Simon and I pay for.”

“Cor, me mum never paid for me to go to school, is vat why I’m stupid?”

“I don’t think you’re stupid.”

“Well I’m no good at sums or writin’, not much good at readin’ eiver.”

“That isn’t always a sign of being stupid, Billy, there are all sorts of reasons why children aren’t as clever in schools as we’d like, and some of that is because of the teachers or their home lives. You’ve already said, home was difficult.”

“Yeah, it like was.”

“Maybe, when I get the girls to read to me, you can come along too and practice with us. Would you like that?”

“I dunno, vey might be berrer van me.”

“Does that matter, if it helps you?”

“Dunno,” he blushed and skipped off to play on his bike with the others.

“Looking at the next intake are we?” Simon said sarcastically as he took Billy’s seat.

“What d’you mean?”

“Well it’s obvious, you’re eyeing up the next candidates for fostering, aren’t you?”

“No, I just told him I couldn’t say that, and I offered him the chance to come and sit in with the girls when I do the next reading session with them.”

“Oh–I got it wrong then, I just thought you were getting into maternal mode again.”

“Yes, you did get it wrong, the boy was telling me about his previous home life and how much he’d enjoyed this Christmas.”

“So you weren’t getting all soppy then?”

“No, I was paying him attention. Children need attention from their carers, whether it be their parents or locums.”

“Yeah, okay–don’t go all pious on me–just let me know before we take on any more permanent liabilities, won’t you?” he slipped away to supervise the kids on their bikes before I could think of a suitably robust reply.

“You know what his problem is, don’t you?” said Stella

“I wish I did.”

“He’s jealous.”

“Jealous? Of what?”

“Of your relationship with the girls.”

“But he has a good relationship with them too, they love him to bits and he idolises them. So how can he be jealous?”

“You do girly things with them.”

“He does other things with them, that dads do.”

“But he can’t do boy things with them, can he?”

“No but he can do that with our two guests?” I suggested.

“Exactly.”

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Comments

Watch out Cathy

the Cameron clan are plotting !, But then i guess you don't really mind do you....Otherwise you would not have been asking Danny all those questions would you?......Poor little tyke, Not had much of a life has he...Maybe the future offers him something better....All he (and Danny) needs are some loving parents!!!

Kirri

That's 5 isn't?

Maybe Cathy should go for an even half dozen? I worry about upsetting the birth order, something that adoption specialists are warry of. Who knows, maybe it will work OK?

Khadijah Gwen

And then there were five...

Given that Billy has spent two years in the home and Danny significantly longer suggests that nobody has volunteered to foster them yet (which is not that unusual - homes tend to be dumping grounds for CLA who are so problematic nobody wants to foster them). I can't imagine that situation changing over a period of two weeks, so I suspect Cathy will be encouraged to continue fostering the boys until a suitable alternative placement can be found (translation: until she decides to apply to adopt them, as most other foster parents would probably take one look at their history and reject them).

Hopefully Angharad will then leave it a couple of years before plotting any extra additions to the family (with the possible exception of Stella falling in love and conceiving again), so the boys settle and all five can assist with the running of the household (thereby freeing up time to allow Cathy to resume her career as a part-time biologist cum wildlife documentary maker).

 
 
--Ben
CLA - Children Looked After. Sometimes also called LAC - Looked After Children.
Just don't get me started on talking about CP, ICS or ContactPoint!


This space intentionally left blank.

As the right side of the brain controls the left side of the body, then only left-handers are in their right mind!

another complication

who would want to foster kids who have been in the care, if only for a short time, of nobles?
just imagine those boys comparing their foster home to the castle they might been to.

Bike pt 859

Stella is right! Any father will want a son to ddddo 'guy things' with. A girl can't really do it because of gender differences and a daddy sees a daughter as a Princess.

    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
    Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine

Whatever

Simon still has head up his butt about a woman's responsibility. Who do you think will wind up with the day to day responsibilities of these two juvenile delinquents ? I will give you one guess. Sure, he gets to do 'guy' things with them but he considers his role as banker more important then Cathy so it should be HER job to do the day-to-day hard job of keeping them out of trouble, feeding them, counseling them, handling school responsibilities.

Where does that leave her career? Is her only responsibility the raising of somebody else's protoplasm ? Also, again, does that mean that primogeniture will come into play again and none of the girls will be able to inherit the title but now one of these two munchkins will cop the lolly ?

This is getting out of hand.

Kim

Enough already.

“Yeah, okay—don’t go all pious on me—just let me know before we take on any more permanent liabilities, won’t you?” he slipped away to supervise the kids on their bikes before I could think of a suitably robust reply.

Okay, I'm seriously not liking Simon.

I admit I've come late to the party -- I've only known Simon from when he was rescued from the Russians -- but I haven't seen many redeeming features. And I sure can't figure out why Cathy married him.

Oscar Wilde

Puddintane's picture

To be perfectly fair, Oscar brought at least part of his troubles down upon his own fool head, through suing the said John Sholto Douglas, 9th Marquess of Queensberry, a Scottish nobleman, for libel when that worthy accused Wilde, in rather intemperate language, of "posing as a somdomite," a subject of which he knew so little that he couldn't even spell it, and generally acted like a thug around Wilde, causing public scenes on many separate occasions.

It's hard to know whether Mr Wilde was more incensed by the accusation of "posing" or the ignorant misspelling. Queensberry was, at the time. angered by Wilde's relationship with his son, Lord Alfred Douglas, who was a ne'er-do-well at best. The libel case collapsed, for obvious reasons, and Wilde went off to Reading Gaol for "gross indeceny," the Law having insufficient words available to describe the inimitable Oscar Wilde. Whilst there, his sentence of "hard labour" consisted mostly of managing the prison library. He wrote De Profundis while in the gaol, and The Ballad of Reading Gaol is based on his experiences there.

On the other hand, the Marquess was quite the character himself, and he and Wilde, in more generous times, might well have been friends. He is said to have demanded to be buried standing up, because he didn't want to lay about waiting for a resurrection he didn't believe in.

He was chucked out of Parliament when he refused to take the religious oath of allegiance to the Sovereign, since he was an outspoken atheist before people were allowed to profess such things in public. He'd declared that he wouldn't participate in any such "Christian tomfoolery" and that his word as a gentleman should suffice.

For all his faults, I confess to a grudging admiration.

He seems to have been a lout, but an engaging one in at least some ways, and had a few redeeming qualities. His boxing association, for example, allowed "commoners" to join in, based on ability rather than ancestry, a scandalous innovation at the time, since the "lesser folk" were perfectly free to poke a baron in the nose if they were able, which might lead to social upheaval. No one of us is perfect, but it was the Marquess and his ilk that eventually led to Monty Python poking fun at those same Barons.

He and Wilde died within a year of each other.

It's rumoured that the gravediggers, evidently offended by his impiety, buried the Marquess with his head pointing straight down toward Hell, where they assumed that he was bound.

-

Cheers,

Puddin'

A tender heart is an asset to an editor: it helps us be ruthless in a tactful way.
--- The Chicago Manual of Style

I believe the Cameron clan

I believe the Cameron clan is going to grow by 2 more and those two will be boys. Somehow, I also see another boy in the mix and that is Leon. I feel something medically will happen with his Mum and Cathy will be asked by her to take care of Leon. Then there were SIX! Jan

Wouldn't be surprised to see

the boys join the clan but still figure that at some point Cathy will participate in a miracle and have her own child. No idea what number that will be but with the medical stuff she's done for others it seems like only a matter of time before she "cures" Trish and Trish "cures" her.

Oh, Rats!!

I've caught up and, per my agreement with Ang, I'm supposed to make a comment. But, it's 6:15 in the morning -- I couldn't sleep so I got on the computer an hour and a half ago and now I'm too tired and just wanna go to bed!! [Sigh!]

This isn't much of a comment, I know, but it **is** a comment so **technically**, I've lived up to my commitment, eh?

And, once again, thank you, Ang, for this wonderful story which never ends and I hope it stays that way!

Yours from the Great White North,

Jenny Grier (Mrs.)

x

Yours from the Great White North,

Jenny Grier (Mrs.)

Leon

I doubt he will join the family directly, but Moma and he may move in, or move very close. Tom's house is going to have to get a few more rooms if this goes on.

Normal is a town in Illinois

Rhona McCloud's picture

Heart-breaking to read how Billie's background is normalised as all that has been ever known. Thank you Angharad for reminding us that feral kids deserve love and attention.

Rhona McCloud