Hi! My name is Jerry.

 ­  Hi! My name is Jerry

By Rachel Anne Keller


          You know like short for Jerome but not?

          My parents and I moved here to Hillcrest just before school started this year, from San Fernando, CA. It was a major change in scenery let me tell you. Illinois is nothing like Cali at all. The weather is different, the landscape is different, and oh boy are the people ever different. I started ninth grade this year and slowly started to make a few friends. Strangely almost all my new friends are girls, not that I am complaining mind you.         

          I do not mean to say that I have never had girl friends or girlfriends for that matter. I have always gotten along with the fair sex rather well. I guess that is really why all my problems started. Not that I am blaming anyone it is just that well a lot of my female friends in Cali were real Valley Girls. Both my girl friends and my girlfriends if you get my drift. So I basically talk like a Valley Girl most of the time.

          You see, I do not take gym class (I hate it.) and it is not required at my school, and I really love to cook (I hope to become a chef some day and own my own restaurant.) so I took home economics instead. It was a month into the school year before I realized that there was something odd.

          Well one day after school Amy (A really well put together girl and a red head to boot. Yummy.) and I were talking after school waiting for our rides when Josh Rider walked up to us and actually asked me for a date. Now I have nothing against gays, I mean some of my best friends in Cali are gay.

          So I just smiled and said, “Sorry Josh I don’t swing that way.” As politely as I could, I really did not want to hurt his feelings.

          Well when he was out of ear shot Amy looked at me with a shocked expression and exclaimed, “Oh My God Jerri, you’re a lesbian?”

          I just looked at Amy with confusion written all over my face and said, “Well Amy, like if I was a girl, I guess like I would be, but since I’m a boy I am definitely hetro.”

          Well Amy just stood there with her mouth hanging open until I politely placed my hand under it and pushed it closed. “Don’t want to be catching any flies girlfriend, that would be like so totally gross.”

          At this point Amy’s dad pulled up to the curb and she just stuck her head in and told him that something had come up and she needed to go to my house for a bit. All her dad said was that she would have to get her own ride home as he had no intention of going out later. Amy told him it was fine, gave him a kiss on the cheek, and told him she would see him later. I waved and told Mr. Watkins good bye.

          I started asking Amy what was going on but she just shushed me and said we really needed to talk in private. Well mom finally pulled up and I opened the door and slid in giving mom a hug and kiss on the cheek. Then I asked if Amy could come over for a bit as we needed to talk. Mom looked at me a bit quizzically but just said sure and told Amy to hop in. We headed to the house with mom asking me all about how my day went. Well I told her the usual then I told her about Josh asking me out. Mom being mom just asked if I had accepted.

          I giggled and said, “Like no way, I just told him politely that I don’t swing that way Mom.”

          Mom just laughed and commented that she did not think that Josh did either. Then shrugged and said, “Well you never know do you?”

          Amy from the back seat picked that moment to say, “He’s not gay Jerri. Josh is totally hetro.”

          I turned in my seat and looked at her, “Then why would he ask a boy out on a date?”

          Amy once again just said, “That’s what we need to talk about Jerri.”

          Mom looked at me, I looked at her, and we both just shrugged. Let me tell you I was totally baffled.Well, we finally pulled into our palatial dwelling place. Which should read: 2 bed 1  ½ bath ranch style home. A little small true but every man’s home is his castle.

          Well I told Amy to take a seat in the living room and I went and grabbed us each a diet Pepsi before sitting down on the couch with her. Since she is just a friend and nowhere near a girlfriend yet I left plenty of space between us so she did not feel uncomfortable.

          “Well Amy like here we are and like you wanted to talk in private so what’s wrong?”

          “Jerri I don’t know what to say or where to start really. I mean are you sure you are really a boy?”

          I giggled again, “Yes Amy, I am like so totally sure. I’d prove it to you but I like you way too much to like totally gross you out that way. Besides if I did my mother would like so kill me.” I giggled again.

          Amy just sat there shaking her head. “Jerri, I really don’t know how to tell you this except for straight out. Ummm, everyone and I mean everyone thinks you are a girl. We think you are a bit of a tomboy but definitely a girl. I mean I would have asked you why you never wore skirts or dresses but none of the girls wear them much anymore.”

          “Wow, Amy that is just like so totally bizarre. I mean I don’t act, dress, or talk like a girl. Let alone look like one.”

          Amy’s eyes bulged out and she shook her head, “Girl you don’t look in the mirror much do you?”

          “Amy come on, like you are really freaking me out girl. If you like can’t wrap your sweet little head around the fact that I’m like really and truly a boy would you at least have the decency to like just call me Jerry?”

          “Sorry Jerri but I’ve like known you as a girl for over a month now.”

          MOM! Please come here.”

          Mom came rushing into the living room and asked, “What’s wrong Jerry?”

          “Amy please tell my mother what you were telling me.”

          “Well Mrs. Miller I’ve been explaining to Jerri that, well that we all thought she was a girl. I mean she does dress a bit tomboyish but there are other girls in our school that dress a lot more butch than she does. All the girls feel like she is just the nicest one of us and she really is a great cook. You should see her in Home Economics, I swear Ms. Smith is learning more from her than Jerri is learning from Ms. Smith.”

          My mom just sat there looking at Amy for a while then at me and finally she turned back to Amy and said, “Amy do you realize that the entire time you’ve been talking about Jerry that you have been referring to him as a girl?”

          “Oh My God, I am so sorry Jerri it’s just that, well you are a girl to me.”

          Mom turned back to me and said, “Well dear it seems that we do have a bit of a problem.” Laughing mom then had the nerve to ask if I wanted her to buy me some dresses.

          “MOM! That is so totally not funny. Like I just try to be nice and treat people decently and all the sudden I change sexes? Come on, like there are nice guys out there, you know?”

          “Yes Jerry, I do know that and I never realized until Amy told us this that people think you are a girl. I have never thought of you as anything but my son.” Although I would not mind having a daughter, my mother thought privately.

          “No one has ever taken me for a girl before I mean I had like three girlfriends this year alone and Kairen and I were actually dating regularly before Dad’s company transferred him here. Here I’ll prove to you that people don’t all think I am a girl.” I jumped up and grabbed the phone, and dialed Kairen’s number. When the phone was answered it was Kairen, god I miss her. “Kairen, damn girl I miss you.” I put the phone on intercom.

          “Jerri? Oh My God, I miss you too sweetie. So like what’s up? I thought you weren’t calling until next weekend?”

          “Kairen, I really need to talk to you. I’m really freaked out. A friend here just told me that well like everyone here like thinks I’m well like a girl!”

          Total silence from the other end of the line. Not the laughter I expected or anything. “Kairen, are you like still there?”

          “Ya Jerri I’m here, I was just like trying to well you know figure out what to say.”

          “Well don’t like you think that is like totally bizarre?”

          “Ummm Jerri dear I really don’t know how to like tell you this.”

          “Tell me what Kairen?”

          “Well like you know the two girls you dated before we started like seeing each other?”

          “You mean Sharon and Kate right?”

          “Right, like Sharon is a lesbian and Kate is bisexual Jerri.”

          “Huh? That like makes totally no sense at all! Why would a lesbian want to like date me?”

          “Jerri honey, like we all considered you more of a girl than a boy.”

          Well at that point Amy just started giggling and mom sat there with this smirk on her face. Me, well I started crying. “If you considered me a girl then why did you go out with me Kairen?”

          “Jerri, don’t cry honey, I love you. It’s just that well I like girls more than I like boys too. I guess I’m like bisexual too, because I don’t mind what you have between your legs I love you for who you are.”

          “Oh My God," I cried, “I am so going to die. I mean when everyone finds out I am really like a boy I am going to be so like murdered! Everyone is going to think I am some type of sissy freak! Oh God, Oh God, Oh God”, I started banging my head on the coffee table in time with my words, sobbing and clutching my chest.

          Amy grabbed me and pulled me into an embrace and would not let me go. We were both crying on each other’s shoulders. “Oh Jerri I am so sorry I never meant to hurt you. I just knew I needed to tell you what we all thought. You know this isn’t all bad.” She giggled, “Now that you’ve outed yourself as a lesbian I know of a bunch of girls that are going to consider you date-able.” She then quietly mumbled, “Me included.”

          I pulled back from her embrace, “Huh? What do you mean by that Amy?”

          “Well Jerri my dear if you wore a dress and had a little more up top.” She held her hands near her ample breasts, “I personally wouldn’t be able to keep my hands off of you, not to mention several of the other girls at school who I now intend to inform that you are taken by me.”

          “Whoa, don’t I like get any say in this?”

          Amy then proceeded to curl my toes with what had to be the most sensual kiss I had ever received. Not to mention the fact that she was stealthfully caressing my ?breast?

          “We need to get you some help up top till you start to blossom my love.” Amy giggled.

The End?

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