"Hey," Monique whispered as she poked her head around Ellie's bedroom door. "Me and Kace are here, we was wondering, you know, how you were feeling today?"

"I'm fine," Ellie mumbled into her pillow, not even opening her eyes to look at her friend.

"Okay," Monique replied, nodding her head as she realised that her presence in the room was not welcome. "We- we'll be outside if you, you know, wanna get up..." The dark-skinned girl sighed as she led Kacey back into the flat's living room, where Janet waited with a look of anticipation on her face.

"...Nothing," Kacey sighed, making the 43 year old woman groan in frustration.

"It's been a week," Janet said quietly. "I know she won't get over this overnight, but- but I'd have hoped for SOMETHING by now. She's barely moved since she got back from hospital, even after she got her stitches taken out. She hasn't even showered, or put on any make-up..."

"We're as worried as you," Monique assured the older woman. "We're a team, you know? We want our Ellie back."

"I think you might be waiting a long time for 'your' Ellie," Janet sighed. "Go on, sit down, I'll make some coffee."

"Thanks," Kacey whispered as she and Monique crashed onto Janet's plain sofa while the middle-aged woman headed into the kitchen to prepare the drinks.

As the kettle boiled, Janet found herself once again reliving the hellish moment when she was told that Ellie was in hospital- and the even more hellish moment when she found out who had put her there.

In the days following the assault, Ellie had given her statement to the police, but had refused to commit to pressing charges despite the officers trying to persuade her. Janet knew immediately why this was, which only made her dilemma worse. If Ellie had been assaulted by any random teenager, she wouldn't have hesitated to help Ellie file as many charges to ensure that the boy would be locked away for as long as possible. But the attacker wasn't any random teenager- he was Janet's own son.

How Ellie and Ethan had come to be in the same room together remained a mystery to Janet, but she was convinced that it couldn't be mere coincidence that out of all the boys at all the parties Ellie had attended, he had been the one she'd chosen to hook up with. Ellie had to have known or been told Ethan's identity, put two and two together and link him to Janet, which meant that- in Janet's mind, at least- she was indirectly responsible for Ellie's assault. The fact that Ellie hadn't been able to look Janet in the eye in the days following the assault only reinforced Janet's suspicions. And Janet knew that worse was to come. Even if Ellie didn't press charges herself, there was still the possibility that the Crown Prosecution Service may proceed with a prosecution of their own, and as Ellie's legal guardian, Janet would be obliged to accompany her to court- meaning that the first contact she'd have with her family in almost eighteen months would be on opposite sides of a courtroom.

Janet was trapped between a rock and a hard place- if she convinced Ellie to drop charges, she'd be letting not just her down, but every transgendered person who'd ever suffered violence at the hands of another person. But if she convinced Ellie to press charges, she could very well be sending her son- her own flesh and blood- to prison, something the eighteen year old boy almost certainly wouldn't be able to deal with. Not to mention tarring him for life as a violent, transphobic criminal, which alone would kill virtually all working ambitions that Ethan had. Janet wished she could turn the clock back and convince Ellie not to go to the party in the first place... And silently, in her darkened room, Ellie wished that as well.

Ellie knew all too well the position that she'd put Janet in, which was why she'd declined to press charges. If Janet had any chance of reconciling with her family, Ellie couldn't destroy them by going ahead with charges against Ethan. She could write off the incident as a moment of panic, a spontaneous reaction that anyone could have had... But that just made Ellie feel even worse. If what she felt was true, then it meant that literally anyone she spoke to could potentially attack her without warning. Ellie was accepting that she would forever be a walking target- and she too felt that she was letting down every transgendered person who'd ever suffered violence at the hands of another person. Her scar might have been on the back of her head, where it could easily be hidden with hair, but it was still one more scar than she deserved to have.

Ellie wished she could forget the whole thing, but every time she closed her eyes, she found herself reliving the assault in her mind over and over again, feeling the glass tear into her skin and the terrifying feeling of losing consciousness and being totally at the mercy of her attacker. She wanted to go back to being the fun-loving Ellie that Monique and Kacey liked hanging out with, but as hard as she tried, she couldn't muster up the strength to even look at them when they visited. She wouldn't blame them if they chose to leave and never return- the way she felt, Ellie didn't want to spend any time with her either.

Half an hour after Monique and Kacey arrived, Ellie finally rose from her bed to head to the toilet, but as she emerged into the living room, she was surprised to find that her two friends were still sat on the sofa talking with Janet.

"Oh, hi Ellie!" Janet said, trying to suppress her relief at seeing Ellie up and about for fear of embarrassing her teenage ward. "Fancy a cup of tea?"

"Um, please," Ellie mumbled. "What are you guys still doing here?"

"We was waiting for you to get up!" Monique replied with a snort of laughter.

"They've been filling me in on what you missed last week, at college," Janet explained. "Do- do you think you'll be able- okay, I mean, to go back on Monday?"

"...I dunno," Ellie sighed. "I just- I just need to use the toilet. You don't have to stay if you don't want to..."

"Why?" Kacey asked. "How long are you gonna be in there?" The two girls on the sofa tried to suppress their laughter so as to spare Ellie's feelings as the blonde girl's cheeks began to flush, but when Ellie herself giggled, Kacey let out an internal sigh of relief that her teasing had been taken for the friendly gesture that it was.

"We ain't going anywhere," Monique said defiantly. "You're our friend. We want the old Ellie back, you know?"

"...You might be waiting a while for that," Ellie sighed. "The 'old Ellie'... Ugh. I dunno. Maybe she's never coming back."

"Well like I said, we'll wait," Monique said, bringing a smile to Ellie's face for the first time in a week.

"You REALLY don't have to if you don't want to," Ellie said.

"Well then we obviously DO want to, as we're not going anywhere," Kacey said. "And make sure you wash your face while you're in there!"

"I- I have to be careful around my stitches..." Ellie mumbled.

"I said 'face', not 'hair'," Kacey replied. "That face has gone far too long without having any make-up on it!"

"And you're, like, covering almost ALL of your thighs!" Monique chuckled. "Next thing you know you'll be wearing jeans instead of a miniskirt!"

"And we definitely can't allow THAT," Kacey said, smirking as the corners of Ellie's lips began to curl upwards.

"I dunno," Ellie sighed.

"We- we won't push you if you don't want us to," Janet announced, making Ellie smile. "Go and get yourself washed, we'll still be here." The three women smiled as Ellie headed into the bathroom to wash her face, before letting out a collective sigh once the door was shut.

"...We do, like, need to push her a bit though, don't we?" Monique asked.

"A bit," Janet conceded. "But we need to let Ellie come to us. And besides... I'm kinda worried that she thinks that it was being, well, 'overtly' feminine that caused this in the first place."

"What do you mean?" Kacey asked.

"Well, you know, her personal style," Janet replied. "It literally screams 'girl'. Like you said, she'd never be seen dead in a pair of jeans, even if it is a pair of girls' jeans."

"I think I get what you mean," Monique said. "She doesn't, like, want to lead anyone on?"

"Exactly," Janet sighed. "Which leads to only one conclusion- she blames herself for the attack."

"Or she's worried that any guy she hooks up with will do the same or worse to her," Kacey mumbled.

"Oh trust me," Janet said with a long, heavy sigh. "Every T-girl worries about that. And not just about potential romantic partners too, but about friends... Family, even." Janet frowned as the mood in the room instantly darkened and a nightmarish thought entered her mind. If Ethan was capable of violence toward a total stranger, there was nothing to say that he wouldn't have assaulted Janet the same way if they had randomly met.

The three women's thoughts were interrupted when Ellie emerged from the bathroom, and they quickly forced smiles back on their faces that the blonde girl instantly saw through. She knew that being around her made them uncomfortable- but she also knew that it meant that the fact they stayed meant that they were friends that Ellie could truly count on. Ellie had had friends in the past who had only been her friends because she'd had a big house, or because she'd had the latest videogame console, only to remove their friendship once a richer 'friend' with a bigger house or a newer videogame console came along. The fact that Kacey and Monique had stuck around when Ellie was at her lowest possible point, when they would have every reason to walk away, was further proof to Ellie that they were true friends- and that she needed to try her hardest to ensure that they stayed her friends.

"H- hi," Ellie said with a nervous wave. "So, umm... Did you say 'makeover'?" Ellie smiled as her friends immediately sprang into action, retrieving her make-up drawer from her bedroom and setting up a makeshift vanity.

Janet watched with a proud smile as Kacey and Monique set about giving Ellie her makeover, but inside, she knew that it was just the first step of many on Ellie's road to recovery, and that there would be several backward steps along the way as well. Janet's stomach began to churn as she remembered that the following day, she herself would be taking one of those steps on Ellie's behalf- and there was every chance that it would be a backward step for everyone.

The following morning, after ensuring that Ellie was happy being left in the company of Kacey and Monique (who had brought with them several old clothes to exchange with Ellie in an attempt to cheer her up), Janet shut her front door behind her and let out a low, pained moan. What she was about to do was necessary, but that didn't stop it from being deeply unpleasant.

On the two tube rides, Janet mentally prepared what she would say to the woman she was about to meet. The last time they'd met, Janet had been threatened with legal action if they ever spoke again, and it had been made clear that the woman no longer cared about Ellie's well-being. However, Janet felt it was her duty to inform her of what had happened- after all, whether she liked it or not, Sharon was Ellie's mother.

"Hang on, I'm coming," Sharon said politely as Janet knocked on the door. However, her good nature vanished as she answered the door and was confronted with Janet's immaculately made-up face. Rather than say another word, Sharon simply tried to slam the door shut, but was prevented from doing so by Janet's large hand.

"Hear me out, please," Janet said calmly.

"I told you I'd call the police if you ever came round here again, you pervert!" Sharon spat, causing Janet's tension to rise. However, Janet would not allow herself to be riled so easily- not when she had such bad news to deliver.

"You need to listen to me," Janet insisted. "There's something I need to tell you. It's about Ellie."

"I don't know anyone called 'Ellie'!" Sharon growled. "LIAM is dead to me!" Janet felt something inside her mind snap at the other woman's insult. How dare she say that about her own flesh and blood? How dare she so casually dismiss her responsibilities as a parent? Before she could calm herself, Janet found her mouth opening and unprepared words spilling out of it.

"Yeah, well you nearly got your wish!" Janet spat. "Ellie was the victim of a violent assault a week ago. She could've lost her life." Janet only had one expectation from the other woman- and that was for her to scream 'good' and finally slam the door, proving once and for all that she was the least fit parent in the entire world. However, Sharon did something that surprised, even startled Janet- she paused and contemplated the words that had just been said.

"What happened?" Sharon asked in a voice barely louder than a whisper.

"She was-" Janet began, before pausing. If she told Sharon who exactly it was who had attacked Ellie, it'd undoubtedly make matters worse- or worse for Janet in the short term, at the very least. "She was at a party, she was flirting with a- a boy. She told him she was transgendered, he hit her in the back of the head with a bottle. If you want to see her, I'm sure she'd like that- if, umm, if..."

"I need to think," Sharon said in a cold voice. "Please leave."

"Okay," Janet whispered. Sharon had asked politely, so Janet wasn't going to say no. However, she wasn't about to allow Sharon to sever all lines of communication again, so before she left, she fished around in her handbag for a pen and a piece of paper, and quickly jotted down her contact details. "In case you want to call. Ellie will be home most of the day. She's very- very shaken, very introverted after the attack."

"Liam was never an extrovert," Sharon whispered, taking the piece of paper from Janet. "Thank you."

"Call me any time," Janet said, letting out a long sigh as Sharon shut the door. The meeting hadn't exactly been a resounding success, but it had gone better than Janet had expected- though that was only because she'd had to tell Sharon that her firstborn child had nearly suffered life-threatening injuries.

On the tube ride back to her flat, Janet pondered whether or not she should tell Ellie about the meeting. On the one hand, it could be encouraging to Ellie to know that her mother was still thinking about her- but on the other hand, she didn't want to get Ellie's hopes up, not when she was in such a delicate state.

When Janet arrived back at the flat and saw that not only was Ellie interacting with her friends in a game of Mario Kart, but actually laughing and clearly having a lot of fun, her mind was made up. The potential for a step forward for Ellie was there, but so was the potential for a step backward, and that was too high a price to pay when Ellie was finally moving in the right direction. However, the guilt about keeping Ellie in the dark stayed with Janet for the rest of the day, and right up to the following morning when she got ready for work and Ellie readied herself for her first day back at college- preparations which, much to Janet's relief, included a full face of make-up and a skirt that fell several inches above Ellie's knee.

"You're sure you're ready for this?" Janet asked the young woman as she grabbed her coat and got ready to head out. "Because I can call work and-"

"I'm sure," Ellie replied. "It's not like- well, you know who's gonna show up at the college, right? Can't hide here forever."

"Okay," Janet whispered. "But if anything happens, you call my boss and she'll let me know, okay?"

"Will do," Ellie said. "What's her name again, Kelly, Kerry?"

"Kelly, Kelly Cowley," Janet replied. "Best boss I've ever known."

"Cool," Ellie said quietly. "So, umm, see- see you later, Janet."

"See you," Janet whispered, letting out a long sigh as she closed the front door behind her. Despite Ellie's reassurances, Janet still felt like she was failing the blonde girl- again- by leaving her to her own devices and heading to work. Janet knew that Ellie was in extremely good company, and that Kacey and Monique would never allow any harm to come to her, but the further away from the apartment she went, the more her anxieties increased.

By the time Janet arrived at her place of work, her nerves were virtually shredded- and it was beginning to show.

"H- hi, Janet," Shannon said nervously. "How- how's Ellie?"

"Oh, she- she's fine," Janet replied, secretly wishing that she knew the answer to that question herself.

"Are you sure?" Meredith asked. "Because I know if it was me, going back to college after just a week away, I'm not I'd be able to just walk back in with-"

"I'm sure," Janet insisted. "...No, I'm not sure. But Ellie is. Well... She says she is, anyway. And I'm really not sure that she is. But she's got to get back to normal someday, might as well be today, right?"

"I hope they find the little bastard who did this to Ellie and throw a whole library at him, never mind just a book," Meredith snorted, making Janet internally grimace again as she hadn't told her friends exactly who had attacked Ellie, and with any luck, she'd never have to. However, that didn't stop them from forming their own opinions about what punishment Ethan deserved. Janet appreciated her friends' impartial take on the situation, but that didn't stop her from feeling guilty every time she found herself agreeing with them...

----------

"Hey Ell!" Monique said as Ellie sat down behind her in her usual bus seat. "Looking good today... Are you sure you're ready for this, though?"

"I'll be fine," Ellie replied. "I want to put this behind me. FAR behind me."

"I'm glad," Kacey said. "Though we're not gonna go to any parties until you, you know, feel up to it. Doesn't feel fair."

"Oh- no, what's not fair is you not having fun 'cause of me," Ellie retorted.

"Nuh-uh," Monique said. "We're a trio. We wouldn't have any fun without you anyway."

"Seriously, you two..." Ellie sighed, before smiling. "Thanks. I'll try to get, you know, back to normal soon. I promise."

"Don't rush on our account," Kacey said. "Kinda feeling partied out after the last few weeks anyway, heh!"

"Kace is actually 45, she just looks younger!" Monique teased, giggling as Kacey replied with a playful shove- but both girls were soon sporting wide grins as their antics brought a smile to their blonde friend's face.

A short while later, the three girls arrived at their college, where Ellie was personally greeted by her tutor, whose look of concern immediately put the transgendered girl on the defensive.

"Hey Ellie," Darren- the tutor- said in his light camp voice. "Good to see you back today. You sure you're ready for this?" Ellie's two close friends both let out quiet chuckles as Ellie let out a long, exasperated moan.

"I will be if people don't keep asking me that!" Ellie sighed. "Honestly, I'm fine. I want to get back to normal. Soon. Please?"

"Glad to hear it," Darren said with a quiet giggle. "Though if you need anything, any time to yourself, just let me know, I'll make sure it happens, okay?"

"That'd be nice," Ellie whispered, smiling as Darren led her to her class.

For the first time in a long time, Ellie found her confidence returning as she walked the short distance to her class. Even though everyone was walking on eggshells around her, they were all unconditionally supportive, which was what she needed the most- knowing the support was available, even if she didn't want to make use of it unless it was absolutely necessary. She had to learn how to stand on her own two feet again, and was determined to do so by herself. However, she was also determined not to do anything to drive her friends away, and she saw swallowing her pride and letting them help her as a very small price to pay.

Ellie found this to especially be true during lunchtime as she entered the college's dining hall to discover that Monique and Kacey weren't the only ones sat at her usual table.

"Hey Ell!" Monique said as the other four diners- all of whom were tall, attractive young men- made space at the table for the blonde girl to sit down.

"H- hi," Ellie said nervously as she grabbed a chair from a nearby table and, after positioning it in the gap that had been made for her, elegantly lowered herself into it, making sure that her skirt covered as much of her legs as possible.

"These four are Gary, Jonah, Wayne and Tom," Kacey said, introducing the young men one by one. "They heard that you were back today and, well- I'll let them explain."

"We heard what happened at- well, you know," Gary- who seemed to be the boys' leader- said. "And we wanted to know if there was anything you needed, anything we could do?" Not crowd me in, for starters, Ellie thought to herself as she felt her panic levels begin to rise.

"I'm fine, really," Ellie whispered, grimacing as she caused an awkward silence to fall over the table.

"Well- okay," Gary said, taken aback by Ellie's cold attitude. "We just, you know, want to help, we're not coming on to you, honest- unless, you know, you want us-"

"I said I'm fine," Ellie snapped, before grimacing and letting out a long sigh. "I- I'm sorry, it's just- I'm sorry."

"I think Ellie kinda needs a bit of space," Kacey said hesitantly. "And right now... Yeah, not much space?"

"Well, okay," Gary said, the frown on his face making it clear he wasn't happy about being evicted from the table. "Facebook us if you change your mind." Ellie felt her cheeks flush as the four young men stood up and walked away, each of them wearing a sour look on their faces.

"Ell, Gary was proper into you!" Monique whispered once the boys were out of earshot. "He's kinda like, you know, into the whole 'knight in shining armour' thing, he'd have been a great boyfriend!"

"I guess," Ellie shrugged. "I'm just- I'm just kinda not interested right now, you know? And I- I'd be too scared to be alone with a boy anyway..."

"Ugh, Ell," Kacey sighed. "We- we're sorry, we thought this'd help, I mean, you look back to your old self on the outside, the make-up, the short skirt... Guess it's gonna take more than that, huh?"

"A LOT more," Ellie sighed. "And- and I do appreciate what you tried to do, but- no more matchmaking? Please?"

"You got it," Monique said, giving the pained blonde girl's hand a gentle squeeze. "We wouldn't have left you alone with him anyway, you know? Just wanted to introduce you, let you get to know each other... But if that's too much for now, that's fine, we'll take it slower. Oh, but I did get a text from Janet while we was in class, asking if we wanted to come over tonight? Like, for dinner and a bit of Mario Kart?"

"Now THAT I would love," Ellie said, making her friends giggle as she felt her anxieties start to fade.

Rather than head straight home, Ellie waited for her friends at the end of the college day and accompanied them on the bus ride home, but when Ellie opened the front door, she was surprised to find that like at lunch, Janet had unexpected company- but unlike the lunch table, the company was someone Ellie knew, and was very much welcome.

"Hi Ellie!" Stephanie said, rising from her seat and giving the blonde girl a gentle hug. "And hi Monique and... Kacey, right?"

"Umm, yep, hehe!" Kacey nervously replied as she shared a hug with one of her favourite singers.

"What- what are you doing here?" Ellie gasped as she sat down next to the woman she had come to consider her guardian angel. "Ah- wait, ask a silly question, right?"

"Umm... I- I just wanted to see how you were, you know?"

"I'm getting better," Ellie replied, before sighing happily as two other transgendered women emerged from the kitchen- one she'd met before, the other she was only familiar with through social media.

"Oh, hey Ellie!" Nikki said as she handed the blonde girl a mug of warm, sweet tea. "Ellie, I'd like you meet Jacinta Hanley, who's a very good friend of mine, a girl 'like us' and, hopefully, another source of support for you!"

"Hi!" Jacinta said with a nervous wave.

“Hi,” Ellie replied. “Umm, thanks for coming today.”

“It was the least we could do,” Nikki said. “Though if- if we’re crowding you, you will let us know?”

“I’m fine,” Ellie shrugged.

“Okay…” Nikki said hesitantly. “Ja- Jamie-Lee Burke sends her apologies, by the way, she would’ve been here but it’s her wedding on Saturday and she’s obviously kinda busy, heh. I asked Kelly Watson too but she only got back from China last night so is a bit jet-lagged right now.”

“Honestly, I’m okay,” Ellie said defensively, before blushing as she realised that she’d just replied to a question that hadn’t actually been asked.

“O- kay…” Jacinta said, awkwardly biting her lip.

“…I’m sorry,” Ellie sighed. “I just- ugh, I dunno. I’m fed up of everyone asking me if I’m alright.”

“Yeah, but- you’re still, you know, hurting…” Monique mumbled. “We want the old Ellie back, but not, you know, for us, but for you, if you know what I mean?”

“I think so,” Ellie shrugged.

“What your friends are trying to say,” Janet explained, “is that they hope you’ll eventually be able to put this behind you.”

“I know, I know,” Ellie sighed. “And I do appreciate, you know, everyone being concerned… I really appreciate you coming around today.”

“Least we could do, honestly,” Stephanie said softly. “This sort of shit happens far too often to girls like us.”

“It happens far too often to girls full stop,” Kacey said darkly. “Any man who hits a woman deserves to have their balls cut off. Umm, uh- no offence, umm..."

"None taken," Jacinta said with a smile. "And believe me, I agree with you!"

“And it’s not always a man, either,” Nikki said coldly. “I know a girl younger than you who was assaulted by another girl at school, smacked her just above the eyebrow with a stiletto heel. Left a scar and everything. All for the quote-unquote crime of wearing a skirt.”

“Disgusting,” Kacey spat. “Oh, umm, the attack, I mean, not the-“

“I figured,” Ellie said as a dark mood descended over the room.

“Anyway…” Stephanie said, taking a deep breath. “Just because these things happen, it doesn’t mean we need to accept them. I have to block something like fifty people a day from Twitter or Instagram because of some of the comments and messages I get. But I’m not letting that stop me.”

“Same here,” Jacinta said. “Well, maybe not fifty a day, but even one a day is one too many.”

“Not really making me feel better,” Ellie snorted.

“Nope,” Stephanie sighed. “Didn’t think it would. But I don’t want to lie to you, Ellie, the path we’re on isn’t an easy one. You’ve hit a bigger ‘bump’ than any of us have. But you’re still going forward, and you should be proud of that.”

“Sometimes it feels like I’m being carried forward, though, rather than walking by myself,” Ellie said.

“And what’s wrong with that?” Nikki asked. “No one does it all by themselves. I had the help of my fiancée and my family, Steph had her bandmates, Jacinta had her dad, and you’ve got your friends, us included. So if you need to be carried, let us carry you, because we know you’d do the same for any of us in a heartbeat.”

“Too right,” Monique said with a warm smile as Ellie let out an involuntary giggle.

“…Thanks, everyone,” Ellie said, sniffing back a tear as the three older girls began regaling her and her friends with tales of celebrities, fashion, beauty and everything feminine that Ellie adored.

Stephanie, Nikki and Jacinta stayed at the flat until early evening, sharing (and paying for) a takeaway meal with Janet and the three teenagers and listening intently to their stories of college and parties- but not the fateful party that left Ellie with the scar on the back of her head.

Nonetheless, Ellie still had a smile on her face when the trio left, taking her two best friends with them as they went. Janet, however, felt no less anxious than she had at the start of the day, as the conscious decision to avoid talking about the party also meant that Stephanie and her friends left the flat still unaware of Ellie’s attacker’s identity- and Janet herself was as much in need of a friend as Ellie was.

“I, umm, I’m just going to see the girls out to their car,” Janet said, forcing a smile on her face as Ellie nodded. “Steph! Umm, Steph, you got a sec?”

“Hmm?” Stephanie replied. “Sure Janet, what’s up?”

“I, umm… Can we talk a bit more privately, please?” Janet asked, grimacing as the other four young women looked at her quizzically. “Actually, umm, can I get you on Facebook when you get home? This is, umm, delicate…”

“Sure, Janet,” Stephanie shrugged, before giving the older woman a gentle hug and bidding her farewell.

Twenty minutes later, after the takeaway containers had been cleared away, Janet sat down in her favourite chair and smiled when a familiar ‘ping’ came from her smartphone, informing her of a new and expected message.

‘Hey Janet,’ Stephanie’s message read. ‘Just got home, you said you wanted to talk privately?’

‘Yeah,’ Janet replied.

‘I figured this attack would’ve affected you as well as Ellie,’ Stephanie typed. ‘Are you feeling okay about all this?’

‘Not really,’ Janet replied. ‘There’s something you should know- the boy who attacked Ellie was my son Ethan.’ Janet paused before sending the message, cursing the emotionless nature of communicating by text. However, she wouldn’t get the talk that she needed without telling Stephanie one way or another, so with a heavy sigh, she pressed ‘send’, and almost immediately grimaced at the reply that came.

‘OMG!’ Stephanie typed. ‘Your son!? What were they even doing together?’

‘Your guess is as good as mine,’ Janet typed. ‘Somehow they ended up at the same party together, they ended up in the same bedroom together, and I don’t need to repeat what happened after that.’

‘Yeah,’ Stephanie typed. ‘Do you think Ellie knew who she was with before they ended up in bed together?’

‘I don’t they got as far as getting into bed,’ Janet replied. ‘But to answer your question, I don’t know. I hope she didn’t, but I think she did, and worse yet, might have been doing it for my benefit somehow.’

‘Have you talked to your son since the attack?’ Stephanie asked.

‘Nope,’ Janet typed. ‘Nor my wife or daughter. I know it sounds bad, but I’m not looking forward to that.’

‘I can imagine,’ Stephanie typed.

‘I’ve thought about this reunion for ages,’ Janet typed. ‘Never dreamed it’d be under these circumstances.’

‘Do you know for sure that you’ll be in touch with them?’ Stephanie asked.

‘If it goes to trial, I don’t see how I won’t be,’ Janet replied, letting out a gentle sigh. ‘Still, it’s something I have time to prepare for.’

‘Well if you ever need a friendly ear, you know where to find me,’ Stephanie typed, bringing a tear to the middle-aged woman’s eye.

‘Thanks,’ Janet replied. ‘Sometimes I feel like such a shitty parent. I’m supposed to be the adult, the mature one and yet here I am asking for advice like a teenager, lol.’

‘There’s nothing shameful about needing someone to talk to no matter how old you are,’ Stephanie reminded Janet. ‘Any time you need help, just ask. Will be thinking of you, Janet.’

‘Thanks,’ the 43 year old woman typed, before sighing as Stephanie logged out of the website and left Janet alone with her thoughts.

Janet found herself dreading the impending confrontation with her family. While she had accepted that it was an inevitably, she still held out a vain hope that when she did speak to her wife again, it would be in a mature and adult way, rather than the angry tones they had exchanged the last time they spoke face-to-face. After all, Janet had spent the afternoon in the company of six women far younger than her, and despite the occasional excited giggle, they had all conducted themselves like mature young ladies. From their example, Janet felt that there was no reason that she and her wife couldn’t have a calm, adult conversation- despite the history that existed between the two of them…

The following morning, Janet and Ellie got up at their usual times, ate their usual breakfasts and followed their usual morning routines, heading to work and college respectively as though the events of the previous few days hadn’t happened. However, both women were anxious as they prepared themselves for the day ahead, and as hard as they tried, they weren’t able to hide their anxiety from their friends.

“Umm, hi Janet!” Meredith said with an obviously forced smile as they pinned their name badges to their uniform blue blouses. “I saw that you had a few house guests last night, you know, from Ellie’s friends’ Instagram, they seemed pretty excited to be around Steph again, heh! Though I’ll admit I’d probably be excited, I wouldn’t be able to keep it OFF of Instagram, and I don’t even have an Instagram, so that should say something about how excited I’d be!”

“Were they- umm, were they round because of, well, you know…?” Shannon hesitantly asked.

“…I figured it’d cheer Ellie up,” Janet shrugged. “And it did. And I figured it’d cheer me up as well.”

“…And did it?” Shannon asked.

“Briefly,” Janet sighed. “Thing about the- well, what happened to Ellie was that you’d think it couldn’t get any worse, but for me at least, it can.”

“How?” Meredith asked. “I mean, the court case is going to be a straightforward one, right? Ellie gives her evidence, they throw the book at the little bastard who assaulted her, everyone who deserves a happy ending gets one, right?”

“Yeah…” Janet grimaced. “Though I- I wonder about, you know, the family of the boy who assaulted Ellie, I mean, he’s only eighteen, it was a stupid, drunken one-off-“

“Doesn’t matter!” Meredith snorted. “If they were that concerned about the little shit they should’ve raised him better!” Janet forced herself to nod in agreement with Meredith’s impassioned rant, but her insides churned with every word she heard- because she knew that Meredith was right, and she knew that she had to shoulder a lot of the blame for Ethan’s attitude. Janet had been tormenting herself every second of every day with the thought that she could have done more to prevent Ellie’s assault, that a simple word or action could’ve set Ethan on a different, more tolerant path- and could even have kept her children in her life after she began her transition.

Including Ellie, Janet had raised three children, and she couldn’t help but feel that she’d let all three of them down. However, Janet could ease her guilt with the knowledge that Ellie had two other parents who had let her down far worse than Janet had- and as guilty as she felt for thinking it, Ethan also had another parent who had to accept her fair share of the blame for Ethan’s behaviour. However, Janet knew her ex-wife well enough to know that she would be only too happy to dump all of the blame for Ellie’s assault squarely onto Janet’s shoulders- and that any attempt to confront her would only make matters worse.

However, Janet still held out hope that someday, some way, she might be able to reconcile with her family- her wife included. She accepted that they would never be lovers again, but they were friends long before they were married, and when they separated, Janet mourned the friendship almost as much as she did the relationship. She knew her wife better than anyone else, and knew that if she approached her the right way, they’d be able to talk maturely, as adults, and hopefully resolve the matter before it escalated any further.

Once her shift ended, Janet found herself facing a dilemma. When they were married, her wife worked part-time in an office for a little extra income, her working day ending at 2 o’clock- the same time Janet’s own working shift ended. Janet wanted to speak to her wife, NEEDED to speak to her to straighten matters out, but knew she couldn’t show up unannounced, out of the blue. She needed to approach her wife carefully, delicately so as not to make matters worse. Seeing Janet face to face would inevitably make matters worse- though that went doubly so if the first time they saw each other again was from opposite sides of a courtroom.

With no other option presenting itself, Janet headed to one of the public payphones outside the supermarket and dialled her wife’s phone number. Janet’s home and mobile numbers were both known to her wife, and Janet was sure she would never answer any call coming from those numbers. An unknown number, however, especially one beginning 020, wouldn’t be so easy to ignore…

Janet’s fingers trembled as she dialled the digits of her wife’s number, and paused before pressing the final one. It was a big step she was about to take, and once it had been taken, it couldn’t be taken back. But it was one that needed to be taken, and not just for her sake, but for Ellie’s as well. Janet’s relationship with her biological children might prove to be damaged beyond repair, but she could still do right by Ellie, and she was determined that she wasn’t going to let her down as well. Janet pressed the final digit of her wife’s phone number, and took several deep breaths as the line rang four times before being answered.

“Hello, Lisa Cole speaking,” Janet’s wife answered, warming the transwoman’s heart- she was still using her married name…

“He- hello, Lisa,” Janet said hesitantly. Despite the several months of practice that had changed Janet’s voice into a convincingly feminine timbre, enough of ‘John’s voice came through for Lisa to recognise- and which caused Janet to instantly tense up as she braced herself for the inevitable.

“You,” Lisa snarled. “You have some nerve calling after all this time.”

“We- we need to talk, Lisa,” Janet said, trying her hardest to remain calm.

“You said everything you needed to when you announced to your family that you were abandoning them to flounce around in a dress for the rest of your life!” Lisa spat.

“I did NOT abandon you,” Janet retorted, taking several deep breaths to calm herself. “I couldn’t live life as a lie anymore. Some people are born into the wrong gender, I just happen to be one of those people.”

“You didn’t have any problem living a quote-unquote lie for the first 42 years of your life,” Lisa growled.

“You know that isn’t true,” Janet said firmly, allowing herself a little smirk when Lisa silently conceded the point. “Like I said, you and I need to talk.”

“Yeah, well you’ve chosen a hell of a time for it,” Lisa snorted. “They saying being transgender isn’t an illness, isn’t a disease but it’s certainly diseased this family. Your son- not that you’d care- is facing criminal charges for fighting off a transgendered boy-girl-thing who tried to seduce him!” Janet bit her lip to keep herself from saying something hasty- after all, Lisa had undoubtedly only heard Ethan’s side of events… And she also didn’t know that Janet was the legal guardian of the girl in question.

“…What happened?” Janet asked quietly. “Ethan’s still my child, I still have a responsibility, you still take my child support money, don’t you?”

“Well- fine,” Lisa sighed. “Ethan was at a party, this ‘Ellie’ person, or whatever its real name is, started coming onto him, she forced the issue, he fought her off in self-defence and is now facing charges of assault and battery.” So I raised my son to be a liar as well, Janet thought darkly.

“Was he hurt?” Janet asked, trying her hardest not to smirk as she knew that the answer to her question was ‘no’- which was more than could be said for Ethan’s so-called attacker.

“He was very shaken after the event,” Lisa said stoically. I bet, Janet thought to herself, before mentally chastising herself that this was her own son she was criticising. A son who had violently and without provocation attacked a girl who had rapidly become one of Janet’s best friends- if Ellie’s version of events was to be believed anyway…

Janet shook such cynical thoughts out of her head as she listened to her wife’s tale-. Even if Ellie was embellishing her story slightly- and Janet had no reason to believe that she was- the scar on her head and the night’s stay in hospital were most definitely not made up, and the fact that scar was on the back of Ellie’s head was all the proof Janet needed that it was not inflicted in self-defence. That, and the fact that Ethan was considerably taller and stronger than Ellie.

“…What about the girl?” Janet asked.

“What ‘girl’?” Lisa snorted. “If you mean the thing that tried to attack Ethan, she got everything she deserved.” As hard as she tried, Janet could help but feel something snap in her brain at Lisa’s callous remark. How dare she intimate that Ellie deserved to be assaulted, just for being transgendered? How dare she approve of such a heinous act? And how dare she call Ellie- and by extension, all transgendered people- a ‘thing’?

“Bullshit,” Janet snarled. “You are talking so much bullshit it’d be funny if it wasn’t so tragic.”

“I beg your pardon?” Lisa spat.

“’Got everything she deserved’?” Janet sneered. “So she deserved to have a beer bottle smashed over the back- the BACK of her head, did she? She deserved to spend a night in hospital? She deserved to be left with such crippling PTSD she may never be the same again? I bet you wouldn’t be so willing to say that to Ellie’s face!”

“…How do you know her name?” Lisa asked. Ohhhh fuck, Janet thought to herself as her insides began to churn again. Janet could see only one way out of the whole she’d inadvertently dug for herself- even though she knew it would cause more problems than it would solve.

“…Because I am Ellie’s legal guardian,” Janet said stoically. “I have been since late last year.”

“You- oh my-“ Lisa stammered, before letting out a sneer of absolute disgust. “So you’re a paedophile as well as a pervert, then? I should’ve guessed, really.”

“HOW DA-“ Janet snapped, before taking a deep breath to calm herself. “How dare you say that to me. I have never, NEVER acted improperly to Ellie, we live together because neither of us have anywhere to go because the people who claim to love us abandoned us simply for being who we want to be. A friend arranged for us to live together and that is all.”

“Whatever,” Lisa spat. “We both know the truth.”

“Yeah, we do,” Janet retorted. “That Ethan is a transphobic thug who bottled a girl simply for being born with the wrong equipment.”

“Fuck you,” Lisa spat, the bile dripping from her voice. “If you ever call this number again I’ll have you arrested for harassment.” Janet let out a long, pained moan as her ex-wife slammed the phone down. Despite her best efforts, her anger had got the better of her once again, and her attempts to smooth things over had somehow ended up making things worse than they already were. Janet could take away one positive from the conversation- that it won’t come as a shock to her family when she enters the courtroom at Ellie’s side- but that was small comfort compared to the knowledge that her wife and her children inevitably hated her more than ever…

When Janet arrived home, she was surprised to find that Ellie had arrived home before her and was sat on the sofa fiddling with her phone, blissfully unaware of the phone call that had caused Janet so much stress.

“You’re late home,” the blonde girl mumbled.

“Yeah, sorry, had a couple of errands to run,” Janet replied. “Good day at college?”

“It was okay,” Ellie shrugged.

“But- but was it better than yesterday?” Janet asked, breathing a sigh of relief as Ellie smiled.

“Definitely,” Ellie said with a smile. “Think people are finally, you know, getting used to it, they’re not treating me like I’m made of glass or something.”

“I’m glad,” Janet whispered. “Ellie, we- you know we’re going to have to talk about what happens next, right? You’ll need to go to court, and as Ethan’s over 18 it’ll be an adult court, and-“

“I know,” Ellie mumbled. “Janet, I- I still don’t think I should press charges. I- I don’t want to do this to you, put you through this, I- I just- ugh.”

“Ellie,” Janet said softly. “Ethan made a mistake. A BIG mistake. A criminal mistake. He should face the consequences for this.”

“You- you’re not saying you hope he goes to prison, are you?” Ellie asked.

“No,” Janet replied, shaking her head. “But he can’t get away scot free. He must receive SOME punishment, or he- and many others- will think it’s okay to do what he did. And you know deep down that it was NOT okay, not even slightly.”

“I know,” Ellie mumbled. “But- I- I don’t know…”

“It’s okay,” Janet whispered. “Whatever you decide, I’ll support you.” Because that’s what a parent should do, Janet thought to herself.

The two women enjoyed a quick dinner in front of the television before settling down for the evening, with Janet researching legal procedures on her tablet computer while Ellie worked on her coursework. Just after 6:30pm, though, the two were interrupted by a knock on the front door.

“…Are you expecting Kacey or Monique tonight?” Janet asked.

“No…” Ellie replied with confusion as she stood up to answer the door. “Are you expecting Steph to drop by again?”

“Doubt it, somehow,” Janet replied with a smirk, which quickly vanished when Ellie opened the door and she could see who was on the other side.

“Hello, JOHN,” Lisa said with a deep scowl on her face.

“…I assume by ‘John’ you mean me,” Janet replied. “Even though that is NOT my name. Ellie, I’d like you to meet Lisa, my ex-wife.”

“Oh, so YOU’RE Ellie,” Lisa sneered as the teenaged girl began to cower. “You’re the reason my son’s being treated like a criminal.”

“…Your son IS a criminal,” Ellie defiantly replied, her legs trembling with fear.

“How dare you, you little freak!” Lisa spat.

“And how dare you come into our home and start throwing around insults!” Janet yelled, her temper instantly igniting as she stood up to confront her ex-wife.

“Big talk coming from a man in a dress!” Lisa sneered. “You look stupid, JOHN. Literally no one is ever going to take you for a woman, ever.”

“Get out!” Janet shouted.

“Fine, I will,” Lisa snorted. “I’m sure social services will be VERY interested to hear about this disgusting little arrangement you have here. If anybody deserves to go to prison it’s you, not Ethan.”

“Social services already know about everything that happens in this flat,” Janet retorted. “They’re the ones who approved of this living arrangement. And if you ever show your face around here again, I will have YOU arrested for harassment.”

“And tell me that anyone who does this doesn’t deserve to go to prison!” Ellie snarled, turning around to show Lisa the ugly scar on the back of her head. A tense silence filled the flat, before Lisa turned around and left, slamming the door behind her as she went. Immediately, the two women left in the flat collapsed into their seats, both shaking with fear and on the verge of bursting into tears.

“Oh- god, Janet…” Ellie moaned as the older woman began to sob.

“I’m okay, I’m okay,” Janet sniffled, before moaning in pain and openly weeping. “No, no I’m not.”

“Do- do you want anything?” Ellie asked.

“No, no, I’ll be okay,” Janet moaned. “It’s just- ugh. Every time I think things are going well, they end up further away than ever. I’m never going to reconcile with my family now, I need to accept that.”

“I’m sorry,” Ellie mumbled.

“Heh, YOU have nothing to be sorry about, trust me,” Janet chuckled.

“No, but- I, umm, I kinda do,” Ellie said, her cheeks burning with shame as tears began to flow from her eyes. “I- umm, at the party, I, umm, I knew who Ethan was…”

“You- what?” Janet asked, trying to control her anger and surprise.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Ellie pleaded as her tears began to flow faster. “A friend introduced us, he said his name and I thought- I- I don’t know what I thought.” Janet remained silent and listened intently as Ellie continued her story. “I thought that maybe, if I talked to him, got to know him, I could bring the two of you together, and I mean, he’s not a bad looking guy, so we kissed a couple of times- I wasn’t going to sleep with him, I swear I wasn’t- and then, well, things happened…”

“It’s okay,” Janet said softly. “You’re not to blame.”

“Wh- what?” Ellie asked.

“You tried to do something nice,” Janet said. “Even if it was a bad idea, your heart was in the right place, and that’s what matters the most. So- thank you, Ellie.”

“You- you mean it?” Ellie asked, black streaks appearing on her cheeks as her tears mixed with her thick mascara.

“I mean it,” Janet whispered. “And I’m sorry that you suffered because you tried to do something nice for me.”

“Thanks,” Ellie whispered, before taking a deep breath. “I’ve decided- I want- I want to press charges.” Janet nodded solemnly, before smiling at the younger woman.

“Then I’ll support you,” Janet said, even as it felt like her heart was being torn in half. There was no turning back- Janet was committed to defending her new family against her old one whether she liked it or not. And as much as she hated to admit it to herself, there was a part of her that hoped that the judges came down hard on Ethan…

Throughout the rest of the week, life gradually returned to normal for the two women. Ellie made her intention to press charges known to the CPS, who began preparing the prosecution on her behalf, while Janet spoke to police about her ex-wife’s uninvited visit to her home. Janet was offered the chance of a restraining order against Lisa, but turned it down- after all, Ethan would need the support of his mother at the trial just as much as Ellie would need Janet.

Other than looking toward the upcoming trial, it was business as usual for Janet and Ellie- both women went to work and college respectively and settled back into their usual routines, with one exception- when Friday evening rolled around, rather than head home to get ready for a night out, Ellie headed home, where she stayed for the rest of the evening. On this particular evening, though, Ellie’s decision to stay home would provide her with an unexpected- but not unpleasant- surprise.

“Who’s that?” Janet asked as a knock came from the door.

"Umm... Not Monique of Kacey, I know that," Ellie said, her anxiety levels immediately rising at the prospect of another encounter with Janet's ex-wife. "They're staying home too..." With trembling hands, Ellie opened the door, and let out a gasp of shock when she saw who was on the other side.

"Who is it?" Janet asked. "El- Ellie?"

"Can- can I come in?" The unmistakable voice of Ellie's younger brother asked.

"J- Jack?" Ellie asked, tears forming in her eyes. "What- what are you doing here?"

"I, umm, I wanted- I wanted to see you," Jack replied with a shrug, before grunting in frustration as his sister gave him a tight hug.

"Don't just leave him standing out there for god's sake, let him in!" Janet urged as she sniffed back a tear of her own. "But- but why are you here, Jack? Does your mother know you're here?"

"No," Jack whispered. "She thinks I've gone to a friend's house, he- he'll cover for me if she checks up. I found your address from when you went to see mum, I, umm, I just figured I'd drop round.

"You- you went to see my mum?" Ellie asked Janet, who immediately began to fidget. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I- I, umm, thought she deserved to know," Janet mumbled. "I thought if she knew what happened, she might come to her senses and come to see you... Guess I was wrong, I mean, she didn't immediately throw me out, I was able to give her contact details but-"

"It's okay," Ellie whispered. "And- and thank you, for, umm, for trying to do the right thing." Janet grinned and wiped away a sudden flow of tears as she was reminded of her words from three days earlier.

"She hasn't said anything about coming here, though," Jack mumbled. "I only found the card by accident, saw- saw Janet's name, and I only know that 'cause we've been talking on Facebook, like."

"Yeah, of course she didn't bother coming 'round," Ellie snorted. "Bet if you told her you came round she'd have a fit."

"That's why I didn't," Jack shrugged. "But I- I really miss you. And I mean, you know, you, not 'Liam'."

"Thanks," Ellie whispered.

"I always kinda wished I'd had a bigger sister instead of, well, you know..." Jack mumbled, his voice trailing off as he struggled to finish his sentence.

"I wasn't THAT bad as a brother, was I?" Ellie asked.

"Well, umm, no," Jack mumbled. "But you'd have, you know, been better as a sister."

"At least someone in my family realises that," Ellie said with a snort of laughter.

"Is it, you know, difficult?" Jack asked. "Being a girl, I mean."

"It was harder pretending to be a boy all those years," Ellie replied with a smile. "Being a girl, it- it's just natural. It's who I was always meant to be."

Janet smiled as Ellie's demeanour brightened with every word she exchanged with her brother. After all the help Ellie had received from her friends, famous and otherwise, her chats with Janet and her counsellor, what Ellie had needed the most was to talk to her own family. Janet couldn't help but marvel as the moody girl all but vanished, replaced by a happy, giggling teenager. Janet wondered if she was finally, after so many months, seeing the 'real' Ellie- and whether she'd see any more of her.

Eventually, Jack had to leave, but he promised to return- a promise he would keep less than a week later, and at least once every week until the date of the trial, and every time he visited, Ellie felt happier and happier. Her life was finally being put back together- she had true friends that she could count on, her family was beginning to return to her, and she had a guardian in Janet who she knew would do anything for her.

Ellie just wished that Janet could herself find some of the happiness that she was rediscovering.