Short Lived :(

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Well my happiness was very, very short lived sadly.

This morning at 4am, my great aunt took a pretty bad fall. I live with her, I have been for almost 4 years now. She and I have had our ups and downs over the years but we have never been violent toward one another. Sadly the local police do not think so.

So she shouted for me, called me by name. I ran out into the living to find her laying on her stomach, her walker half crumpled underneath her. She was barely responsive but she definitely asked me for help. When the EMTs got there though, she unconscious and unresponsive. They took her in an ambulance and I thought it was over. I would either see her in the morning or later, all in all a peaceful night's sleep in weeks. Not so lucky.

The police showed up.

I was questioned, gave them my statement and then grilled by a detective on my front lawn. He tried to badger me into confessing that I assaulted, that I deliberately pushed her. I'm not allowed back in my home, they wouldn't let me even get my dog. I'm writing this from my mother's living room, on my brother's laptop. My aunt is in surgery right now with a brain bleed, I'm scared too death. Not just for her but for me as well. The Detective was so damn convinced that I did it, he even implied I was responsible for her other falls too.

This is the WORSE day of my life.

Comments

Some cops can be absolute assholes

I know from experience. Thanks to cops who couldn't be bothered to actually investigate following information that others gave them, and my making a mistake in being honest, I came within a hair of doing 25 to life for two counts of second degree murder I DID NOT commit.

There was all kinds of evidence that showed I could not have done it, lots that showed the people that very likely DID do it, but that didn't mean a damn thing to the cops involved in the case. It was far easier for them to blame me and close the case than to do their damn jobs.

I hope your situation turns around and that your great aunt recovers and is able to set that stupid cop straight. Grrrrrrr!!!!!!

Sorry, but this is a huge pet peeve of mine, actually pet peeve is a big understatement.

Get a Lawyer

and say nothing. This is your right.
Just be there for your Aunt.

Be careful of what you write

My dear friend (I call you my friend, you've always replied my messages in a great way) were was I oh yeah!Please be careful of what you write! The Police apparently must read your blog and comments!
I'm not going to sugar coat this! If they persist YOU GET A LAWYER, In my day when I was young and stupid
we called them Pigs (Yeah that still fits them) I BELIEVE YOU. ............TASH

Please, get a lawyer. Try

Daphne Xu's picture

Please, get a lawyer. Try for an immediate court order allowing you to get your dog, as well.

-- Daphne Xu

-- Try saying freefloating three times rapidly.

You poor kid

Don't post any comments here, facebook, or any other place. DO NOT agree to speak with ANYONE without a lawyer present. If you can not afford a lawyer, if arrested, IMMEDIATELY request a lawyer. One MUST be provided for free. You need a witness to any interviews. DO NOT speak to anyone, including the press. You really need a lawyer right now!!!.
Hang in there kiddo, We're all pulling for you.

Hugs
Karen

this above!! 100 times!

shadowsblade's picture

Been around cops all my life--heck some family ARE cops and I mean federal ones TOO!

Shut -up say nothing get a lawyer or public defender---and no net stuff for sometime!
Do phone calls or Skype live voice chat at best

message me here if you need that from me!

Proud member of the Whateley Academy Drow clan/collective

Attention, it may not be about you!!!

AuPreviner's picture

Given your description of the living arrangements and the family dynamics, I am baffled by the detective's line of questioning. It makes no sense. I think he isn't after you.

Look, your mother and brother will likely inherit along with you or before you if she hasn't had children. There is no profit motive for you to see her harmed on your part. The detective knows this.

What the officer may be up to is far worse. He is wanting to declare the family incompetent so the state can take over and become her guardian. The want to sell her home, raid her bank accounts, and prevent you from having access to her. They see her as a cash cow.

I have one distant relative who was blocked from caring for her elderly mother because the police did the same thing to her. The state spent a ton of her mother's money and nearly blocked her from her last minutes of life. It was awful.

The detective smells money for the state.

Please get your whole family to work on this.

Prayers going your way!


"Love is like linens; after changed the sweeter." – John Fletcher (1579–1625)

I'm sorry

Don't talk with police if it's possible. Some of them are literally filtering what others say them.

Hugs
QM

You may be targeted by a bigoted cop

I admit to be suspicious and cynical of law enforcement based on their conduct towards me when I've reported crimes and the way I've seen others treated. I'm not trying to unduly scare you but you need to be hyper vigilant and self protective.

You need an attorney and you need help from whatever LGBTQ resources there are where you live. At the very least you need to find out if this detective has any history of bigotry and go from there. That the detective wouldn't allow you to remove your dog and what are clearly personal possessions even under supervision is suspicious in its own right. Perhaps he wants you to return to the house to retrieve the dog and your stuff and then arrest you for breaking and entering or, if you don't charge you with animal cruelty for leaving the dog.Most members of law enforcement are politically/ socially/ religiously conservative. Some of them are able to be objective when interacting with people who "are not like them" while others use race, religion, ethnicity or gender identity of the public who they interact with as a license to persecute, prosecute or kill.

You had charges brought against you with Adult Protective Services that were found to be unfounded. That does not matter to some cops- they will decide that those "feel good" social workers didn't know what they were doing and go out of there way to make a case- real or manufactured- to show them up. Don't forget that cops are evaluated on how they close cases and if they can bring charges against someone it is a plus for their evaluation.

I'm offering prayers for you and your grandmother.

If it is legal

Record any conversation that you have with police or official without them knowing about it. Most smart phones have audio recording apps. The recordings may show their bias, and be important in any legal proceedings. Sad about your Aunt, and also the crappy way you are being treated.

Wendy

Haylee V's picture

In the US, and probably many other countries as well, recording a conversation without both parties consent is illegal, thus the need for collections agents to Mirandize their customers prior to dealing with them ("This call may be monitored for training purposes, this is an attempt to collect a debt, etc...") Also, any information obtained by such a recording is not admissible in court, unless the person that did the recording was a DIRECT party of the conversation (the so-called "one-party consent" clause). See Lopez vs. United States (1963) or U. S. vs. John J. Johnson(1994) for further information.

*Kisses Always*
Haylee V

I am pretty sure not in this case.

shadowsblade's picture

After the cops give you Miranda rights---they give up theirs to be recorded too!

Proud member of the Whateley Academy Drow clan/collective

As eof

Haylee V's picture

failed to mention whether rights were read or not, this rule currently applies. If, however, the detective properly Mirandized eof, then you are correct, and I'd say record away.

*Kisses Always*
Haylee V

Haylee

Not sure the lead sentence is correct for the USA:

http://www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/recording-phone-calls-and-co...
"Federal law permits recording telephone calls and in-person conversations with the consent of at least one of the parties. See 18 U.S.C. 2511(2)(d). This is called a "one-party consent" law. Under a one-party consent law, you can record a phone call or conversation so long as you are a party to the conversation."

"In addition to federal law, thirty-eight states and the District of Columbia have adopted "one-party consent" laws and permit individuals to record phone calls and conversations to which they are a party or when one party to the communication consents."

http://www.dmlp.org/legal-guide/recording-police-officers-an...
Additionally, there are more exemptions for Recording Police Officers and Public Officials.

http://torontoemploymentlawyer.com/2017/08/hart-v-parrish-he...
In Canada, it appears “one party consent” prevails, "there is the principle of “one party consent” meaning, it is not contrary to the criminal code to record conversations you are a part of, i.e. you are a party to the conversation and therefore, can consent."

Remember your Mirandas

Haylee V's picture

1) You have the right to remain silent. I strongly urge you to do so.

2) You have the right to an attorney, AND to have said attorney present during any and all questioning. Use this to your advantage. "Lawyering up" is neither a crime or an admission of guilt, no matter what the police try to tell you. The proper phrase to use is "I refuse to answer any questions without a lawyer present." Period. The second you utter those words, all questioning, by law, must cease. You also cannot legally be held more than 24 hours, nor can you be denied rights, such as food, water, clothing, use of the toilet, medication, or (if you smoke) the opportunity to smoke. Doing any of those things is a direct violation of your civil rights.

As a former police cadet, we were trained for over six months in how to properly "make a collar". There's a very thin line between what is legal and permissible (a police officer can, and many often do, unfortunately) lie to a suspect to obtain information and/or a confession. They are allowed to promise the sun, moon, and stars as well, even if they knowingly have no intent on delivering on their promises. What they CANNOT do, EVER, is threaten you with bodily harm or imprisonment for exercising your rights. Saying "talk or else..." is a direct violation of FEDERAL mandates, and will subject the offender to FEDERAL prosecution.

*Kisses Always*
Haylee V

Reaching out

Haylee V's picture

I'm thankful so many have reached out to eof to try to help. I have sent a PM, and provided my cell. I hope eof will use it, as I'm currently trolling Google to see if I can find similar cases or precedents that may aid in this case. When I posted the blog about wanting to help form a support group, this was one of the things I had in mind as well. If anyone else has legal experience or can help troll for the info, please PM me. Thanks!

*Kisses Always*
Haylee V

I hope your aunt recovers

I hope your aunt recovers from this fall. If she does your problems should disappear. If your dog is still stuck in that house alone you need an immediate court order to rescue it. If you can't afford a lawyer try calling the local humane society and explain the situation. They may be able to help.

Not necessarily

As the police will have to wait for the woman to wake up and be coherent to answer questions. If the detective is assigned to the case he/she may attempt to coerce a statement from her concerning him as its now a legal matter. It would be advised that a lawyer be present upon her waking so that if her memory is blurred or she does not remember how she fell, coercion is not given.

Get A lawyer you trust if you can.

MadTech01's picture

First Lawyer.

If you can get a decent lawyer he/she might begin to make press statements to try and tip thing back to an equal footing if the police tell the press it was attempted murder or abuse of the elderly.

Also your lawyer will probably try and interview your neighbors to find out what they thought of your aunt and you, a police officer with a singular focus is very dangerous for you because they will not be willing to see other options or admit there is evidence that exonerates you, also you DA may bring charges only to get a conviction or to fore you to plea to a lesser charge. To many District Attorneys view convictions as political capital and dropping cases or not guilty verdicts as political liabilities. I had a friend that the local DA for my county bullies into a plea even though it was explainable due to the vehicle he was driving. HE had a bad lawyer then, the DA does not care about right/wrong or even if you are innocent they want to get re-elected.

"Cortana is watching you!"

A case of...

I know you are guilty of something. Now I'm gonna find or fit up the evidence to make sure that you are. After all, I have a convistion quota to keep and man, you are gonna make me make mine big time.

As well as getting a lawyer, get your lawyer to make whatever the US equivalent is of a Ward of the Court. They will appoint a lawyer to represent interests her so that no questioning of her as she comes around is allowed.

IANAL and all that but this is general advice.
Samantha

Update

Enemyoffun's picture

I managed to finally be able to get back home after nearly 12 hours. I spoke to a detective on the phone, I don't think it was the same one. He said he'd been at my house all day and they were concerned with the state of it. No mention of me or what was said earlier. The house was condemned by the building inspector though. I'm currently at my mother's with my dog---a place that doesn't allow pets his size. I'm scared that they might ask me to leave then I'll have NO where to go :(.

Thank goodness you are safe for now.

EOF,

I'm truly saddened by your situation and wish with all my heart that there was something I could do beyond thoughts and prayers to improve your situation. What I can offer is some thoughts which you are free to accept, modify or reject as you see fit.

1) Don't let anyone else tell you how you should or shouldn't be reacting to your circumstances or what you should be doing. If people want to offer material help, fine. Accept it or decline it as you wish. If people think they know better and try to tell you what to do- fuck 'em. They aren't in your shoes.

2) If you can do so, give yourself conscious permission to feel and or react as you need to. If you give yourself conscious permission to be in whatever way you need to be in a particular moment, it means you can give yourself permission to change your emotional state and reaction when another mood will better serve you. No matter what anybody else says, you are in charge of you. This is not an isolated event, but the latest in a series of setbacks and tragedies that you are enduring. You don't need outside permission to mourn/ grieve/ freak out as you need to as you come to terms with what is happening.

3) No matter how well meaning someone may be when they try to assure you that they have been through something similar/ as bad/ worse/ almost as bad, that was them in the past and they aren't you in the present. So take their reassurance with a large grain of salt and focus on what you need to do to not only survive this debacle but to the extent possible, but to thrive.

4) When you are able to do so, start on a plan to improve your situation. Their are always options if you can think outside of the box. They may not be great options, hell, sometimes you only get to try for the least sucky option, but they are always there.

5) If it is possible, remember some of the silver linings that have come your way. When you are in a shit storm, it is only natural to focus on the shit. A while back you wrote about the Adult Protective Services investigation, how the charges were determined to be unfounded and how as a result of their investigation, you got some help. That is a silver lining in the shit storm. I hope you can find other examples.

5) Your writings reveal that you are very intelligent, culturally and socially literate, resourceful and comfortable in a wide range of environments Your protagonists are reflective of who you are in real life; I'm a harshly critical reader and if I can be drawn in to your stories, it is because they are believable. I not only believe in the characters you create, but in you as their creator. When you are ready, become one of your characters and come out of this mess for the better. Find resources where they may be, develop a plan and work it/ amend it and re-implement it as necessary.

Perhaps more than you will ever know, you are loved, respected and admired by the people whose lives you have touched with your writings. All of us who know of your situation are in your corner whether we post or remain in the shadows. Please open your heart and let the love in that is out there waiting for you. You deserve it and it will nourish your soul.

Condemned for what cause?

MadTech01's picture

There are legal requirements in every state, county and city to condemn a property!
Does it have electricity, running water, etc...

Where ever you live call an attorney it sounds like that one detective has some kind of vendetta or grudge against you. And after you get an lawyer, call who ever the local inspector is for you it will usually be city or county depending on if you live in the city limits or not and find out why they condemned your aunts house. There has to be a legal reason or someone be in trouble.

Also watch out some cities can take condemned property from the owner and resale it since as a condemned property it is a public safety issue.

Hang in there EOF, get a lawyer you need one to protect your rights and civil liberties.

"Cortana is watching you!"

You -really- need to talk to

You -really- need to talk to an attorney. If they called a building inspector, you need to find out 1) Who called, 2) why did they call, 3) Were they let inside, and if so, under what authority. The city can inspect _property_ (in most cases), but entering into a building usually requires advance notice and court action. Being told "oh, your aunt fell, and we're condemning your property" is VERY strange.


I'll get a life when it's proven and substantiated to be better than what I'm currently experiencing.

From what I have seen...

MadTech01's picture

From what I have seen if a property is off limits due to an investigation don't the police have to have a notice posted at the site?
And also don't building inspectors also have to post condemned notices as well at the property.
I also know most animal protection laws prevent law enforcement from banning entry to a property if animals are present if they do animal control has to be called to pick-up the animals until either the owner can take them back or they are put up for adoption.

A lot of things are being said to EOF by the authorities and they just do not sound legally sound here. Please EOF get an attorney, if thee things are all happening and are not legal do you realize the liability this police department is putting them selves in for a lawsuit due to civil rights violations, these things never end with small numbers for the settlements.

"Cortana is watching you!"

Bad News

Enemyoffun's picture

After all that, it looks like I'm gonna have to get rid of my dog. The landlord here will only allow me to keep the dog here until the end of Friday. So I either have to find someone who can take him for me---until I get my own place---or get rid of him altogether. Today, I seriously thought about walking and not coming back. I'm sick and tired of this shit. This week has been the worse one of my life. I fear its only going to go downhill from here. I'm looking at my dog right now, trying to envision my life without him and I CAN'T. All I want to do is cry and hope a miracle happens.

I'm so sorry

This is horrible for you. Is there any rescue group or temporary shelter where you can board him on an emergency basis? Have you tried to reach out to people you know who might be able to help?

I hope that you are able to find a solution because animal companions are vital to our well being.

Register your dog as an emotional support animal

Go online to https://www.registermyserviceanimal.com and register your dog as an emotional support animal then the landlord can fuck himself they can't do anything to prevent you from keeping your dog there it will also prevent whenever you go to a new place them denying you because of your dog any place even with breed restriction or size restrictions has to allow an emotional support animal regardless of size or breed