My Graduation From Kindergarten. From Catherine Linda Michel

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Why Kindergarten? Well, that requires a bit of explanation, I guess.

When I started my RLT (Real Life Test) I saw the year to come as a chore to be completed, following which, I would emerge, changed and ready for my new life as the female I was supposed to have been from birth. I saw the year as the whole test.

Now, on the very verge of completing that year, I realize that it was more a primer...Kindergarten in many ways. The REAL Real Life Test is the rest of my life, and there is no graduation ceremony. There is simply finally being who I want, who I need to be.

Along the long, twisted path of transition, I have made so many friends that it would be impossible to name them all, but some deserve special mention.

Kim Em, Prue, Neri, Jan S, Ty, Pippa, Phoebe, Piper, Pickle, all witnessed my beginning fumbles toward understanding and dealing with the impossible. They started and sustained my writing, and the development of my persona...Cathy_t_. Crystal and Sapphire played a huge part by hosting sites where I could post my beginning scribbles and receive feedback. Steve Zink edited my very first full length story without being asked, and made it so much more readable. Prue, Neri and KimEm kept me here, on this earth, one dark night when I had lost all hope and contemplated the abyss. Without them, none of what has transpired since, would have happened at all.

Holly, Maggie(da kitten), Shelley, SaraUK, Debbie, Genni, Connie and more than I can remember, were added to the list of wonderful, faithful, dear friends as I progressed in my writing, and my understanding of being TG, and finally acknowledging being TS. Holly and Scotty made it possible for me to have a new computer...something I never could have afforded, and kept me in touch with everyone and everything I needed.

Now added to the list are Erin, Grover, Paula, Scotty Bishop, Gwen, Edeyn, Toni T., Smorr, and many more from the list of authors at Top Shelf, my home on the internet for over 4 years.

When I first started my journey, I never, never knew that there were so many wonderful, generous, compassionate people out there in cyber land. I thought they were all just nicknames, faceless and anonymous. I was never more wrong in my whole life.

Each and every one of you, from the most closeted "guest reader," to the more personal writers, and dare I say fans?, contributed to my quest and my self realization as Catherine Linda Michel. May God Bless each and every one of you.

There is one who deserves special mention. That one is Ariel. Ariel, who, from the very beginning of our friendship, pledged to be not a cheerleader, but a realist. She kept me from getting lost in my flights of fancy and kept me focused on what was most needed...reality. She constantly helped me maintain my grip on reality and focused me on the important things.

In the process, something began. Something which surprised us both. Love bloomed. For a few precious months, we planned for a life together as lifemates, and it was glorious for us both. Then...things began to cool. We began to realize that we wanted different things, and we drifted apart, romantically. We have remained close, trusted friends and will remain so for the rest of our lives, if I have anything to say about it. I would trust her with my life...and I do.

There is one other. Grover, my friend, my dear, trusted, wonderful, gifted friend. You and your wonderful wife have become family to me. Every time I have needed someone, you have been there. Every time I came to you in tears, you helped dry them and fixed my makeup. Through the hardest, most trying times in my life, you were there. My Mom's passing, the loss of my beloved pet, the death of my dearest online friend, Kim, and on and on. You have asked nothing from me and given me everything you had to give. You are family, now and forever more.

So, as I look forward to my graduation from kindergarten, I now see the rest of my life as a student. The RLT is not a means to an end, but rather, the end of a beginning, and the start of a new, wonderful life as a woman, in my heart, mind, and soul. The education process never really ends, save with death.

With incredibly caring, compassionate, generous and understanding friends like all of you, how can I fail? In a larger sense, you are ALL family to me, and I love every one of you.

Thank you seems such a poor, pitiful thing to say to all of you, and yet it comes from my heart, and I mean it in every way possible. You have all been midwives to my birth, and only death will stop that love. Had I the means, I would gift every one of you with all the things that make life fun. Love, friendships, money, happiness, understanding and acceptance. You have made my life wonderfully rewarding, and so, Thank you.

I know, in this lengthy missive, I have either forgotten or missed some names. I plead age and the need to remember so many great, great people. Rest assured, if you weren't mentioned, it wasn't on purpose...just a failing memory.

Without all of you, my new life wouldn't be possible.

Ready for first grade I am,
Catherine Linda Michel
May God Bless you all.

Comments

Kindergarten

Your comment reminded me of the book by Robert Fulghum "All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten".

My mother was a teacher's assistant in a private Kindergarten for many years before the public schools added their own Kindergarten level. The family joke was the number of years it took her to "graduate" from Kindergarten.

I hope you continue to learn and grow and are happy in all your future endevors.

Huggs,

Michelle

Michelle B

You're welcome Friend

That is what friends are for Cathy! For everyone life is a continuing learning experience. For us who may be a little Gender bent we have an extra large helping on our plates. We have to go back and relearn all over again what most folks have to go over only once. Does that mean we understand the other gender more than those who doesn't cross that picket line? Not in my own case as well as for some others too. I've done the best I can to fake it, but understand the male? Nope. However I can't claim to understand the female of the species either. Struck in the middle, completely lost, that's me! So Congrads Cathy for making to the first grade hon! :) I'm afraid that I'm still going to be in pre-school for a while!

hugs!

grover

Ah, the school of life

In a way I have only just celebrated my majority last year. Time for a college level course I guess. The subtleties of life is hard enough for a ordinary people let alone for those who have to relearn all the rules of the road. That is why some people have a hard time with new languages of course.

I suspect if one is good at languages it might be a little easier to pick up a new social language.

I am mediocre at best so it has taken me that long to achieve adulthood as a consequence.

But I'm better now :)

Kim

thanks

Thanks for the mention cathy.

Jessica Marie