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ok everybody. Frills has come back from edit and now I have a situation. Its been suggested that due to the EXTREME length that it be separated into more than one book. in fact it was said that as it is now it rivals War and Peace at an excess of 350,000 words. As much as I would like Frills to be in an actual book, I doubt that it's an option available. So the problem I have to address is; do I separate Frills into two or three books? If i do then of course I want all those books immediately up for sale. Another thing that was brought up was repetition. The main incident of bullying suffered by the protagonist and the Frills song were repeated used in the story. I thought this was important but the editor doesn't think so. so the questions I'm asking of those that have read Frills are: do I like it as is(one big story) or do I separate into two or three books and do I keep those things in or compress?
In case you wonder why I'm asking, its simple. I made many mistakes with PomPom and I did not want to repeat them with Frills. The main complaint being that the story was entirely too short.
Comments
honesty from a fan
To me, Frills could be separated into three big areas: pre-outing, post-outing but pre-opening, and post-opening.This gives you several major storylines that occur in each book.
You could do alterations to some of the subplots and move them around to fit in one book instead of another. There are several that could be moved without impacting the major plots.
I do agree with the editor about the Frills song. Perhaps putting it at the very beginning of Book 2 and Book 3 so you can simply say that they sang the Frills song without writing the entire song out.
Regarding the bullying incident doesn't have to be rehashed, once for background at the beginning and another where she has to retell it (I believe in court?) is all you need. Any other time can have it "explained" without going into details.
And there were some issues I had with PomPom but length wasn't one of them. Your writing evolved by miles since then, you shouldn't compare it to Frills.
I'm told STFU more times in a day than most people get told in a lifetime
My view
I agree it could be easily split into 3 books and the bullying incident could be reduced to 2 full explanations but please please do not cut out the frills song in full, in my mind it really adds to the charm of the story and it would be diminished by just referring to it they might as well be singing anything!
Keep up the great writing.
Jessi
Frills in One...
I do not know if l am a minority or not but I love long books, and would like to see Frills in one book. As far as editing the Frills song, I think the author is the one to determine when and where "it" is needed.
Sure did enjoy the story.
Published
I think Frills was a lovely story and these are my feelings:
1. I think it should be a single/stand alone book unless you plan to add to the series.
2. The Frills song - I think when the Frills girls sing it the lyrics should be shown, but when others sing it, like at the mall's Safe Halloween when the little girls sing it, a reference to the song is all that is needed.
You are the author, your thoughts are the most important.
(((HUGS)))
Jeri Elaine
Homonyms, synonyms, heterographs, contractions, slang, colloquialisms, clichés, spoonerisms, and plain old misspellings are the bane of writers, but the art and magic of the story is in the telling not in the spelling.
Too Much
I remember thinking as I read the story that putting the entire song in so many times was too much. I agree that saying "They sang the Frills song," or "They began, 'We are the girls from Frills...' At the end of the song, everyone clapped," would move the story along. A few times is fine, but I thought there were too many. At least that would be my preference, but it's your story.
Suzij
its your story
id leave it as is. I never got to finish reading pompom fortress before you removed it. Now never will, which is a pity.
frills
To me it seemed there were two books in Frills: 1 the bullying, 2 the business. I agree the repetition of the frills song became unnecessary filler due to repetition. I didn't find the repeated bullying backstory objectionable in serial form, though it might not be necessary in book form. The vixen subplot seemed, like not wanting to end the serial, and didn't add much in my opinion. I also found the mentors family succession subplot disappointing in its conclusion and thus dispensable. I enjoy your writing, and am surprised the same author wrote Frills and Lyssa.
The book of Frills
I truly can understand your quandary over this. I think either way is fine in the long run. It is your story so ultimately its your decision. As to the separate books and the Frills song, you may choose to leave it in, if one book then I would consider just leaving the first line and explaining they clapped or cheered at the end. As to the rehash of the bullying I believe that it only really needs to be rehashed when she comes out at school during the assembly and it court. Ultimately you are the authoress and I the humble reader of your wonderful story but I enjoyed it so much I never considered just how many words were in it, I have read War and Peace and it was not as entertaining as Frills, so regardless of your choice I will buy it and enjoy it.
As far as Pom Pom I never got to read it here, but I have bought it on Amazon and enjoyed it greatly. I don't think it to short.
opinor ergo sum
Charlotte Van Goethem
I'd Love one book
I'd love to have Frills as one book, in fact I'd prefer having the option of buying what's currently here on BC as one book.
I am far from an expert where creative writing is concerned.....
But the story was a hit as is - why mess with success?
If necessary, you could split it into multiple books, but I would definitely not remove anything. Yes, the song was used repeatedly - but it is an integral part of the story, as are the incidents of bullying and the repetition of the primary incident. That one act drives the entire story - discussing it several times within the story doesn't detract from it. Rather, it simply imitates life. In the real world it would have been necessary for the story to be told to different people at different times. Doing so in the book simply follows that line.
Don't remove anything Hon.
Dallas
D. Eden
Dum Vivimus, Vivamus
Frils
I enjoy reading long books and Frills was one of the best.
I think that Frills should be one book and if you write any sequel, that would be book two.
The Frills song,was a charming addition throughout the story.
PLEASE DO NOT diminish the effect by only referring to it.
PJS1948
Seems To Me...
...that there are a lot of things when a story is first published in long serial form that become redundant when published all at once. If you're putting it out in multiple books -- even if someone's expected to read them in sequence, and it's hard to look at Frills in any other way -- perhaps not as much. That would seem to me to be the kind of thing your editor was talking about; the song and the key bullying incident may indeed fall into that category.
If Frills were a submission to me as a professional fiction publisher (I've been an editor/publisher, but not of fiction and nothing longer than about 80 two-column pages, except for editing and proofing a few multi-part stories here), I'd encourage you to tighten the story; there are a few subplots that I think the story could have done without and some incidents I found needlessly repetitive. But I'm not sure that's the kind of compression you have in mind.
As a reader, I'm the kind of guy who appreciates one long book, at least until things get to the point of Bike, Gaby or Tuck. (And even there, I'd leave the pieces a lot bigger than someone more conscious of sales appeal probably would.) But from both a sales standpoint and a logistical one (if there were to be an actual printed edition), multiple volumes would probably be the way yo go.
I'm not at all sure this is of any value to you, but I thought I'd provide it anyway.
Eric
'Frills' in hardcopy
However it is decided to publish in hard copy, a soft copy or e-book form should be available for those who would purchase that way.
Just a thought.
Robyn B
Sydney
There's proofreaders ... and editors.
Any author can look at their own work some years later and see improvements. Only a rare author can see how to cut chunks off their child. The book is long but this doesn't matter as an e-book but only as an realbook.
Cutting down the full song to a briefer reference will make almost no difference - although it may help readability a bit.
Identifying and chopping a larger chunk may need some help .... and without re-reading the whole thing most of us couldn't help easily. Take a deep breath .... and ..... it's your decision.
Well done
AlysP
Bought Frills
Read 3 times all ready song repeated to much... as a reader when I came across the frills song I performed in my mental tv I just have a cute attack,
pun intended, and move on will I read Frills again and again and again and again hellllllll yea baby love me some frills
ed
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