Haylee V

Daily Silliness

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1) You know, it's often said that almost EVERYTHING tastes like chicken. If that's truly the case, one has to wonder: Just WHAT does chicken taste like? I mean, you could say it tasted like itself, but that's a poor point of reference, in my opinion, to have something defined recursively like that.

2) Mathematical Proof that Women Are Evil:

OK, most people know that to acquire a good woman takes both time and money. In other words, woman is a PRODUCT of time and money, or mathematically:


A joke...

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Once upon a time, a mason decided to build himself a house. He set about buying the bricks, the mortar, and all the necessities he thought he would need, then set to work.

The mason toiled night and day on his manse, making sure everything was just right. Finally, after over a month, his dream home was finished and ready for him to move in to.

As he was cleaning up from the construction, he happened to see a lone brick just hiding in the grass. Being meticulous, he thought he had purchased just enough bricks to finish the house, and was surprised to find one left over.

When dealing with IDIOTS, you have to speak their language...

OK, so I USED to be a member of a site called Geeker.com. It was touted as a FREE streaming site. When I was actually CHARGED for the service, I went online, to a "Live Chat", to try to rectify the situation. Below is the ENTIRETY of the transcript. Please note what occurs at the very end, especially. It's quite humorous!


Ronald Bailey

Why was I charged for a FREE membership? I have e-male proof Geeker.com charged me during my 5-day free trial (which I applied for on June 8). I was charged by Geeker.com on June 9th, JUST ONE DAY later.

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 12 - I'll Give You The World...

I'll Give You The World...
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Alaine had to be, without a doubt, one of the loveliest and most graceful women in the entire world. Everyone in the hamlet of Dervonshire simply adored her. Women wanted to emulate -- no, to actually BE -- her, and men courted her day and night, trying in vain to win her favor -- and her heart.

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 08 - The Hoarder

The Hoarder
(c) 2017 Haylee V

One day, in the tiny hamlet of Pine Grove, lived an eccentric junk collector named Thomas. being a junk collector, he was quite poor, and survived by living off the discarded trinkets and baubles of the more well-to-do.

"Why do you collect such junk?" the townsfolk would often ask. "It's completely worthless to anybody. You should find a real job, like helping the farmer or the miller. At least then, you'd be assured of your next meal."

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 11 - The Cross-Eyed Bear

The Cross-Eyed Bear
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, in a forest deep and lush, lived a very lonely, very sad bear named Thaddeus. Thaddeus wasn't like other bears. Sure, he loved honey, and splashing in the stream, and catching fresh salmon. All bears do. But Thaddeus had a very unique problem -- his eyes.

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 09 - Watch Where You Sit!

Watch Where You Sit!
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, there lived a clever carpenter in the town of Cedardale. he was known far and wide for being the best craftsman of his trade around, and as word of the quality of his work spread, he began to get an ego. it wasn't too long before he became boastful of his skill.

One day, he was heard boasting to his friend in the town square, "I can make just about anything you can imagine, and out of any kind of wood you bring me. Yes, when I build something, it's built to last."

Figure this out (If you can...)

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Once upon a time, three traveling salesmen were walking along a long stretch of road, trying (in vain) to peddle their wares. As the sun began to set, the weary salesmen began to look for a place to rest for the night, when they stumbled upon a hotel.

"How much for a room?" they asked the owner.

"Thirty dollars a night," he replied.

So the salesmen each handed the owner a ten and took the key.

A short time later, the owner had a change of heart. It looks like the salesmen are down on their luck. I'll give them $5 back.


I'm two for two now... Heh. Heh. I commented on a post by Erin, and as soon as I went back to the home page, my parable popped up as a "Random Solo". I just posted it, too. Gotta quit doing that. Too spooky... I'll be posting the Parable for yesterday in a few minutes (editing it now). Look for the Sunday's parable around noonish, and the 8th's around 6 pm, EST. That will catch me up for the month of June, I hope.

Haylee V

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 10 - How Brother Mole Lost His Sight

Today's parable was inspired by a story I read by a dear friend, Sarah Goodwoman. It's a story of betrayal, revenge, and ultimately, healing. You may read it --> here <--

How Brother Mole Lost His Sight
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Truly Uplifting Performance

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OK, I don't know if anyone's been watching America's Got Talent, but if you didn't catch the end of last week's episode, you missed a truly remarkable performance by a deaf 29-year-old singer named Mandy Harvey.

Here's her GOLDEN BUZZER performance: --> Golden Buzzer and the song she sang (an original), with lyrics: --> Try

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 06 - Brother, Can You Spare A Dime?

Brother, Can You Spare A Dime?
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, a rich nobleman had two fine sons, whom he was grooming to take over the family business. The elder son proved to be a shrewd businessman, tough on his customers, but quick to make a profit, sometimes overcharging his customers for their needs or using otherwise shady tactics. Anything for a quick buck seemed to be his credo.

Can't believe I just did that!

Well, it's out of my hands now. I just did one of probably the STUPIDEST things ever...

In a brief fit of insanity, I actually made a stand up comedy routine and sent it (along with an online application) to America's Got Talent. I figured if a tone-deaf, ukulele playing 12-year-old can win a million bucks, then why can't I?

Wish me luck (all bad, I hope... LOL.)

At least it's crossed off my "Bucket List" now.



Two of the ABSOLUTE WORST Jokes ever


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Once upon a time, an Egyptian soldier robbed a Pharaoh's tomb to help feed his large family. A search party was quickly formed, and the best general in the army was sent to apprehend the thief. Knowing this, the soldier decided he would be safe in a nearby ziggurat -- a holy temple. Unfortunately, the ziggurat was quite cold, so the soldier decided to build a small fire to warm himself. Alas, there was no where for the smoke to go, and the soldier ran out of the ziggurat choking and sputtering -- right into the hands of the waiting general.


My apologies for posting late. My muse took longer than I thought to wake up tonight, and by the time I had written and edited the parable, it was already after midnight. I owe all my readers a total of three parables now, one for today (the 5th), as well as the 2 "catch up" ones I was planning, for January 2 and 3 *I am trying to post 2 parables a day, and hope to, by the end of the year, have a full 366 parables on the site.)

Anyway, enjoythest ory. I hope all the Lakota words are self-documenting, as I THINK everyone knows what pemmican and a tipi are.

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 04 - Mapiya Woksape Creates the Moon

Mapiya Woksape Creates the Moon
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Many millennia ago, when the Earth was still young, a brave scout decided he would catch a rainbow. Few of the elders knew how or why they were made, or if they could even be captured. No one in Ahiyu Wigmuke's village had ever heard an idea so foolish -- or foolhardy.

Blast from the Past

I was trolling the net just now, completely bored out of my mind. I entered the name I used when I was going through myRLT in Pensacola a few years back, and discovered some things I thought forever lost -- my first forays into writing. I was using the Pseudonym Veronica Haylee McKenzie back then, and the stories started out as Canonical for Brittany McMaster's MORFS site. I'm surprised to see them still up, as they have long since become Non-Canon, and hardly resemble anything on her site now. But I was young back then, and had lofty ideals.

The Parables


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Author note and disclaimer
Parables of the form Today's Parable - YYYY - MM - DD - Title are ORIGINAL WORKS Everything else has been BORROWED from various sources over the internet, and all efforts have been made in story to properly credit the originator of said parable(s).

Today's Parable - 2017 - 01 - 01 - Just a Bum

Just a Bum
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, a wealthy and respected king, eager to learn if the loyalty and compassion shown him was genuine, or just out of fear for his position, decided to test his subjects.

This king was known far and wide for his handsome baby face and regal bearing. I must do something to disguise my appearance, he thought, lest I be discovered and my plans ruined.

Daily Parables by Haylee V

Hi. I hope you are enjoying my daily parables. I've included a title page, sorted chronologically, where all of them may be found. I'll try REALLY HARD to post a new, ORIGINAL one each day, hopefully by Noon, EST. I'll update the title page daily as well, adding links to that day's story as it's posted.

Haylee V

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 02 - The Hen and the Hawk

The Hen and the Hawk
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, a beautiful, but somewhat misguided hen lived on a farm. She spent her days doing what most hens do -- scratching the ground for seeds and worms, preening her feathers, or laying eggs. She had a relatively good life -- safe and easy.

Unfortunately, though, she wasn't happy. She would often gaze longingly at the sky and watch the wild fowl fly overhead in absolute freedom -- a freedom she yearned for with every fiber of her being.

National DONUT Day

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Tomorrow, June 2nd, is NATIONAL DONUT DAY here in the United States.

Several places are giving away FREE DONUTS tomorrow: Krispy Kreme, Dunkin' Donuts, Entenmann's, and Tim Horton's to name a few. (You may need to buy a coffee or beverage, though, or mention Donut Day.)

If you're NOT a donut connoisseur, then may I suggest donating yours to a worthwhile charity, a policeman / fireman / EMT, or a homeless / battered woman's shelter? I'm SURE they'd appreciate them.

Today's Parable - 2017 - 06 - 01 - A Little Goes a Long Way

A Little Goes A Long Way
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, a poor baker decided to bake a loaf of bread. He gathered all of his ingredients, and set about making the dough.
After kneading and proofing it, he set the dough aside to rise in the afternoon sun, being mindful to pinch off a tiny bit and store it in a jar in his cupboard, for later use.

"Why do you ALWAYS do that, Father?" his son asked one day.

Today's Parable - 2017 - 05 - 31 - The Cog

I was reading my messages today, and was surprised (and very pleased) to find a message there from someone who is having a rough time of it right now. This parable is dedicated to her.

The Cog
(c) 2017 Haylee V

Once upon a time, a famous artisan in Bavaria was building a cuckoo clock for the Baron. Being an horologist gave him a great sense of pride. The work was laborious, as each tiny piece had to be meticulously placed by hand to make the clock function and the birds chime.


I thought of you today.
As my day began.

I thought of you sitting in your playhouse
Sipping your lemonade
Hair flowing freely
Dimpled cheeks, freckles, crooked smile and all.
Laughing freely as you played house with your dollies
All while twirling about in your silky yellow sundress and Mary Janes.

I thought of you today.
As my day began.

The Brave and the Rattlesnake

OK, I'm a little late posting, but here's today's fable. It's one that reflects my Lakota roots. Enjoy. - Haylee V

The Brave and the Rattlesnake

One day, a Lakota brave went up a mountain into the timberlines to gather wood for the fire. While he was busy gathering the wood, he happened upon a rattlesnake, shivering in the cold.

"Brother brave," the snake said, pleading, "Please help me. I am freezing up here, and if I stay much longer, I shall surely die."

Funny Joke

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I was reading through my comments today on my parable, "True Riches", and something AuPreviner said resonated with me, and reminded me of this joke, which I'm sharing...

Q: What do you get when you play a country song backwards?

A: Sober and pardoned / paroled, plus you get your wife back, your house back, your truck back, your dog back...

Today's Parable - 2017 - 05 - 17 - True Riches

OK, Gentle Readers, here's today's fable for your enjoyment.

True Riches
(c) 2017 Haylee V

One day, a farmer went to the convenience store to feed his one vice -- gambling. He knew that the odds were against him ever hitting it big, but he indulged himself once a week, allowing himself to purchase a single $1 lottery ticket. He had never won, but got joy just the same by the anticipation.

His wife, however, saw this as a needless expense.

Inner Demons, AKA Journals of an Angry Trans Gurl - Chapter 2.3

Inner Demons, AKA "Journals of an Angry Trans Gurl"
© 2017 Haylee V

* This is a true account of my life experiences. All persons portrayed in this story are based on actual people I've met throughout my life, and the events portrayed actually happened. No malice is intended to those individuals involved, and names have been altered to protect the identities of the people portrayed. *

The "Poor" Nobleman

Many years ago, a very wealthy nobleman took his son with him to tour his vast lands. Along the way, the son saw many of the nobleman's poor serfs. As night approached, and being far from home, they reached perhaps the poorest serf they had encountered. The man and wife looked bedraggled - their clothes were little more than rags, their small hovel run-down, and crowded by them and their three children. Cats and dogs ran in and out frequently, and the food was nothing more than fruits and vegetables -- there was no meat, no cheeses, no bread, and especially no wine.

Why are You Still Carrying Her?

Once upon a time, two Buddhist monks were walking along after a horrendous thunderstorm, marveling at how nature could be, in one instance, so tranquil and beautiful, yet in another, so violent and devastating. As they were walking along the path, they soon saw the wood bridge spanning a fjord had been washed away, leaving little way to cross the stream except to wade in the swiftly-moving water. As they were removing their sandals to do so, they noticed a young woman, heavy with child, struggling to ford the raging current.


I think I should take a small break from Demons for a little bit, to give my rainbows, lollipops, and unicorns happy -- fluffy meter a chance to recharge. Shouldn't be more than a week or two. I have a SOLO I'm working on, which I'll post in a few days, that hopefully will answer the oft-asked, but never answered question, Why me? It'll be up in a few days. Alicia is only half-finished, which irks me a little, as I know I promised to have it up on the 17th.

The Difference Between Heaven And Hell

I heard a story the other day, and I thought I'd share it with everyone. I'm not entirely sure, but I think it may have come from an old Ann Landers column or something...

The Difference Between Heaven And Hell

A devout man went to sleep one night, and dreamed that he was face to face with God.

Urgent message for the Comtest maven

It seems as if Smoky Corners has gone on permanent hiatus. That being the case, I'm making a request for it to be permanently removed from the list of contest entries for December 2016. (It can still remain on site, however, if anyone wants to read it -- maybe as an archived story, as it was my FIRST posting on BCTS...) I may do a re-write one day, but no longer feel it is of the caliber to be included among the other fine stories you received. Thank you.


My wish

I once had a dear friend.
We shared laughs and tears,
Pains and triumphs.

Now, that friendship is no more.
Forever broken,
Unable to be repaired.

At the time, I thought I was doing the right thing.
But alas! Actions have consequences.
My actions, though indirectly, caused this person much pain.

I never wished tragedy upon this person --
A person who has shown me nothing but trust and friendship.

But I made my decision.
Right, but for all the wrong reasons.

Demons 2.2 Up

I just posted the next "installment" of Inner Demons. It IS NOT a full-fledged chapter, and just explains the transport to
the facility, and Geoff's "indoctrination" into the mental health system, Southern style. Enjoy.

WARNING: This sub-chapter is VERY DARK and somewhat graphic in it's depiction of the abuse. If you have a weak constitution, please READ WITH CAUTION or avoid altogether.

Haylee V

Inner Demons, AKA Journals of an Angry Trans Gurl - Chapter 2.2

Inner Demons, AKA "Journals of an Angry Trans Gurl"
© 2017 Haylee V

* This is a true account of my life experiences. All persons portrayed in this story are based on actual people I've met throughout my life, and the events portrayed actually happened. No malice is intended to those individuals involved, and names have been altered to protect the identities of the people portrayed. *

Sister Princess Fan Fiction

OK, so I was up rather late last night watching a wonderful little anime series called Sister Princess, about a boy who fails his high school entrance exam, due to a computer glitch, and is exiled to an island paradise. Upon arrival, he discovers he has a quite large family of sisters (12 in all) he never knew existed. So I was wondering if I could put a spin on the story, and see what would become of it if the characters had been all born male, and as a warped sense of punishment, they had been transformed -- slowly -- by the island into the girls they now were.

The Machines Win

It's official. The MACHINES have taken over. ABSOLUTELY NO company on Earth is manned by HUMAN BEINGS. You have a problem, go through the infinite maze of button pushing, and maybe -- just maybe (say as the world as we know is ending) -- you might luck up and reach a human voice -- the LAST PERSON ON EARTH (from Outer Mongolia). However, s/he will not understand your language at all, and you will be placed on hold for a moment -- your last thought as you lose your grip on reality will be "I only wanted to get my (cell phone / car / computer / etc.) to work.


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