Synopsis:

Pat and Kim were Mandy's best friends. Jake hated them. Now he has to spend the entire day with them. Who, if any, will survive?

Story:

Karma Part4
By Amanda D.

“How does it feel when I push here?” Dr Roy asked as he dug his fingers in the side of my spine.

“OWWWW!” I yelled with unwanted tears of pain welling up in my eyes. “It hurts!”

He removed his fingers and walked over to the x-rays that just arrived and looked them over. “Well the good news,” he began, “is that there doesn’t appear to be any spinal damage. The spots that were operated on seem to be intact and healing fine.” That was good. “I would say the pain is coming from a slightly pulled muscle or something along those lines.”

Whew! That was good news. Ever since Charlie jumped on my lap, I’d been scared shitless that he’d done serious damage to me.

Two days after getting out of here, Anita had come to the house with Jack and Charlie. In his excitement upon seeing me, Charlie had charged across the room and pounced right on my lap. The pain was so great it was all I could do not to throw the kid off of me. I restrained myself (more from not being able to move than from compassion for the kid) and didn’t kill him though.

Anita and Jack ran over and pulled him off of me, while I tried not pass out. They apologized profusely and scolded Charlie. I told them not to worry about it. I sat there for a couple of minutes as the pain built. Finally when I couldn’t take it any more, I asked (Well begged actually.) for a pain killer and to be brought to my room. When I tried to get up, I knew it was all over.

“Take me to the hospital” I demanded. “I think he did some real damage.” I glared at Charlie and he instantly started crying. Which instantly made me feel bad for him and got me bitched at by Rita.

“Amanda Marie!” She growled. (You know you’re in trouble when they use the middle name.) “I know you’re in pain, but the little one didn’t mean it. There is no reason for you, an adult, to give him such a look. You apologize to him right this instant.” (APOLOGIZE??? Are you friggen kiddin me? I outta kill the little shit!) When I didn’t say anything, Rita demanded impatiently “Well!”

I was stuck. I knew well enough that if I didn’t do as she wanted. I would be stuck there until I complied. My back was really killing me so in as composed a voice as I could manage I said “Charlie honey. I’m sorry I scared you. I didn’t mean it. My back just hurts a bit.” I looked over at Rita as if to say “satisfied?”

She gave me a reproachful look and said “I’ll get your coat.” She hurried into the hall. “We will discuss this again later!” she yelled over her shoulder to me. (Ya know I just can’t catch a break around here.)

After being set free from the hospital, came the long ride home with Rita. To say she was disappointed in my behavior concerning Charlie would qualify as the understatement of the year. As soon as we were alone in the car she tore into me.

“You know, Amanda” She started. “to act the way you did to a child is totally unacceptable. How could you do that to him?” I started to speak but she cut me off and continued her verbal assault. “There is no excuse that you can offer that will justify your behavior. It’s just wrong. To make poor Charlie cry like that! I can’t believe you! How could you do that? I don’t know what’s gotten into you, missy! (Oh shit!) All he wanted to do is hug you. He didn’t realize that he would hurt you. He’s just a baby.”

Oh she went on… and on…and on. By the time we got back to the house I felt like the only person in human history more horrible than me was Hitler himself. (And even that may have been debatable.) She verbally beat me up one side and down the other. I never got a single word in the entire ride home. (It was so bad I almost wished the hospital had kept me.)

After we got back Rita insisted I call Anita and offer an apology. Having been brow beaten into submission I did as I was ordered. I got hold of Anita and gave what I thought was a heart felt apology. After about five minutes of Rita supervised groveling Anita said, “Don’t even think twice about it. Really sis, it’s fine. About five minutes after you two left he calmed down and we explained that he had accidentally hurt your back and that he had to be more careful in the future. He said that he would and that was that. As a mater of fact he’s in the kitchen right now making you a get well card.”

I had no idea what to say. I sat there for almost a full minute trying not to strangle Rita with the phone cord.

Finally Anita said “Are you still there?”

“Yeah” I replied flatly.

“She didn’t harass you the whole drive over this little episode, did she?” Anita asked.

Gritting my teeth I said “Yep she sure did!”

“Oh Mandy” She replied. “I’m so sorry. I can’t believe… Well actually I can believe it. I’m sorry she put you through that, but you know how she is.”

“I have to go kill her now!” was all I could say.

“Mandy don’t do anything rash. She 'sold you know.” Anita joked.

“Then it won’t be so bad. At least she will have lived a long full life.” I retorted. “But seriously I need to go. My back is killing me and I need to go lay down.”

“Ok sis. I’ll be by tomorrow. Bye” Anita concluded.
“Bye.” I replied hanging up the phone. I shuffled upstairs, went into my room and banged my head off the wall for a while.

“Amanda phone call” Paul hollered from down stairs.

I walked over picked up the phone. Before I could say anything I heard “Well if it isn’t little miss, I get thrown off my balcony by my ex-husband and live to tell about it but still can’t call my best friends when I’ve been out of the hospital for a month.”

“Err…Hi...errr….Kim” I said.

“Don’t you hi Kim me missy. I don’t want to hear your excuses. I’ve already talked to your mother and she says that you're healed enough to go out for awhile so Pat and I will be over in two hours and we’re taking you out to the Lucciano’s for lunch. After that we’re going to Copley Place and do some shopping. (Shopping? Uggg!) Even if we have to push you around in a wheel chair, you’re going! So be ready!” She reeled off as she hung up on me. (What is it with these women around here? I can’t ever seem to get a word in edgewise.)

“Ma, I need your help!” I yelled.

Rita came flying up the stairs and in to my room. “What’s the matter dear?” She asked breathlessly.

“Well since you told Pat and Kim I was okay to go out for a while, they're going to be here in two hours. So I need you to help me get ready.”

Two and a half hours later there was a knock on the door. Rita opened it and Pat and Kim strolled in. Pat Wendle is thin about 5’5” with short brown hair and expressive brown eyes. Kim Gould on the other hand was a good 5’8”. She is pretty heavy. She has long sandy blonde hair and hazel colored eyes.

Pat and Kim were classic J.A.P.s (For those of you unaware that stands for Jewish American Princesses.) They are rich, spoiled, and opinionated. In their opinion the whole world revolves around their needs. They used to drive me nuts when Mandy and I were married. And now I was going to spend the afternoon with them. (This was going to be interesting.)

“Kim, Pat how nice to see the two of you again.” Rita gushed.

“Hi Mrs. D.” Pat replied.

“Where is our patient?” Kim asked.

I took a second to mentally prepare my self and said “I’m right over here.”

“MANDY!” They both squealed. They both ran over to hug me or something.
I immediately had Charlie flashbacks. I put my hands out and said “No. My backs still sore.” At the last second they pulled up and skidded to a halt. Gently and one at a time, they each gave me light hugs.

“Oh, we’re so glad to see you up on your feet finally.” Kim began. “We actually came to see you when you were in the hospital but you were sleeping and that bitch of a nurse wouldn’t let us in. The nerve. Can you imagine! But that’s okay I told Daddy about her and he called the hospital and she got in trouble over it.”

“You didn’t!” I exclaimed.

“She sure did.” Pat chirped in. “Her father said that the nurse got suspended and everything.” I was speechless.

Then Rita reading my expression said “So where are you girls off to?”

“We’re gonna go to lunch and then some shopping at Copley Place.” Kim replied.

“Yeah we figured ol’ Mandy here had enough of being stuck inside. So we figured we’d treat her to some food and a couple of new outfits. Ya know the usual.” Pat added.

“Well just don’t wear her out to badly” Rita warned.

“Don’t worry Mrs.D. we got it covered.” Kim said with a sly grin.

The ride to the restaurant was an adventure. Pat and Kim blathered on about this and that. (While I planned their demises.) I really didn’t have much interest in what they were saying. I was to busy trying to figure out who they had gotten in trouble at the hospital.

When we arrived at Lucciano’s there was a table waiting for us. We were seated immediately. The waiter came over and asked “How are we today ladies? Would any of you like a cocktail while you look over the menu?” Kim and Pat each ordered a drink and I asked for some water.

Once he walked a way Pat said “Not drinking today? When have you ever gone out for a meal without having a few drinks to go with it?” Kim inquired in a rather snotty voice.

“Well if it really makes a difference, I’m on a bunch of different pain killers. So I’m don’t think mixing alcohol with them would be such a good idea. Ya know. I’d kinda like to be conscious for our shopping expedition later.” I replied in an annoyed voice.

Their faces lit up. “Pain killers!” Pat exclaimed. “What ya got? Anything good? Perks? Vikes? Demerol?”

“Yeah” Kim piped in “You got any you can share?”

I shook my head in disbelief. (These chicks are friggen clueless!!) They just stared at me waiting for an answer. “Um …Well right now I need them for my back and stuff.” I retorted “But when I don’t need them anymore, we’ll see.” That seemed to satisfy them and the conversation moved on to other things.

Somehow I managed to get through the meal without killing either of them. (Quite an accomplishment I think.)The food was very good, especially since I was still recovering from hospital food overdose. They talked through the whole meal. They gave their opinions of every guy in the restaurant. (Needless to say I didn’t have much to say on that subject.)

After that subject was played out they moved on to neighborhood gossip. I found out things about the neighbors I never wanted to know. Everything from a more detailed account Mrs. Wasserman’s depression issues to the Murphy’s marital problems. I learned about Brian Quigley’s drug addiction and apparent sexual problems. No one was safe. I couldn’t believe the things they had the gall to say about people that were supposed to be their friends.

After we finished we headed to the mall. The trip was short but adventurous. Kim was driving and apparently had more to drink that she should have, as we almost took out about a dozen pedestrians along the way. Anyway we got to the mall in one piece. (I’m just not sure how. That girl just can’t drive.)

Once there, we headed straight to Nieman Marcus. We hit the ladies' clothing department with a vengeance and never looked back. Now I’d gone clothes shopping with women before, so I thought I knew what I was getting myself into, but shopping with these two was a whole different animal. (Of course looking for cloths for myself in the woman’s department was new too.) Kim and Pat are as close to professional shoppers as you could get. They hit every rack in the department with the thoroughness of crime scene investigators. Not having much of an idea of what to look for, I just kind of followed them around trying to learn what to get on the fly.

After about 45 minutes they each had an armful of stuff to try on and noticed I had only a handful of things. “Is that all your gonna get?” Pat asked.

“I just want to see what looks good on me.” I answered. “It’s been months since I’ve been shopping so I’m not sure what I want to get. I lost so much weight when I was in the hospital. Now that I’m out, I’ve gained some back. I don’t even know what size I am never mind what style I like.”

"So what ya got there?” they asked. I showed them the pathetically small amount of stuff I had.

“Nope. Uh Ah. To conservative. No way!’ they criticized as they went through my selections. “OOOOOOOO how about this??!!!" Pat displayed the smallest “mini” skirt I think I ever saw. (And I’ve checked out a LOT of skirts!) “Go try it on we’ll wait for you “(You’ve got to be kidding me! Is she for real?)

“Uuumm my back is starting to hurt” (please God let her buy that.)
“Come on you wuss just try it on.”

“Then will hit another store where you can sit down.”

I strolled towards the dressing room. I had a funny smile on my face as I walked in thinking about the fact that there would be half naked women trying things on in there. (Every guy’s dream.Vaavaaaoommmm). Then out of a stall walks Godzilla in a short dress. (Quick, someone grab me a bucket. Arrgg! Fuck it, just poke my eyes out!) My fantasies now abandoned I walked into a stall and shut the door.

I then remembered I still need help getting dressed and undressed. (Perfect!) Now I had to ask one of them to give me a hand. Choosing the lesser of two evils I called out “Pat can you help me please?”

Pat strolled in giggling and told me “You want me don’t you.” (Ya like it’s my fondest desire to be stuck in here with you.)

After helping me to remove my clothes in a stall the size of a phone booth we finally got me into the skirt. (There’s better be a good dream in there some place). “Ok we’re coming out” Pat announced.

As I walked out I noticed a guy staring at me. He turned to his friend and I saw him mouth “NICCEEE Legs.” He grinned at me like I was piece of meat. (Okay get me out of here.)

“Take a picture next time it lasts longer! “ I growled and flipped him off.

Pat walked up behind me, looked over at him and said “Man’s he’s fine." (cringe) “You should go talk to him”

“Uh No.” I replied.

“Suit yourself.” was her answer.

“Mandy that skirt looks great.” Kim screeched “You should definitely buy it.” (You want me to buy this??!! It doesn’t even cover my ass!! )

“No it looks great on you” Pat encouraged.

I took a look in the closest mirror. I did a quick twirl and had to admit it did look good but I just wasn’t ready to wear something like that yet.

I went back into the dressing room and with Pat’s help once again I tried on a pair on jeans. How do women wear theses things? They hugged my hips and ass so tightly I could hardly move. Once again I walked out to get Kim’s approval and once again that asshole was there ogling me again. (I really don’t need this right now.)
Kim smiled approvingly at the jeans. “Stay right there for a sec.” she told me “I saw the perfect blouse to go with those.” She grabbed Pat’s hand and the two of them scampered off.

As I stood there waiting the guy that had been checking me out wondered over. “Hi.” he said. “My name’s Ben. I was wondering if you might want to go out for a drink sometime.” (I’ll give him credit, he wasn’t easily dissuaded.)

“No thank you.” I answered icily. I turned and started to walk away when he put his hand around my arm.

I turned back to him and said “You better remove your hand right now or you’re gonna lose it.”

As he dropped his hand he said “Aw come on don’t be that way. At least tell me your name.”

I started to tell him to buzz off but at that exact second Pat yelled “Amanda we found it.”

“Amanda.” he said coyly “That’s a beautiful name for a beautiful girl.”(He’s a smoothie!)

“Look ah… Bob is it?” I asked intentionally getting his name wrong.

“Ben actually.” he replied.

“Look Ben I’m sure you’re a nice guy and all but I’m really not interested. Okay?” I said.

Pat and Kim pulled up and asked if I was Okay.

“Amanda,” he said, “I only want to take you out. Why are you giving me such a hard time? Just one drink. Come on what do ya say? Friday night, I’ll pick you up at 8 pm. Sound good?” He had this smug grin on his face, like it was a foregone conclusion I was gonna say yes.

That grin just pissed me off. “Well since you put it that way” I said with a coy smile as I reached out and kicked him in the balls “I’m still going to have to say NO!” He went down hard. I turned and walked back into the fitting room.

Pat and Kim scurried after me. They were both in shock. Once we were inside the dressing room, Kim grabbed my arm and said “Mandy! What the hell was that all about? Why did you do that to him?”

“He just wouldn’t go away.” I explained. “I told him I wasn’t interested in going out with him three times. He wasn’t taking no as an answer, so I got pissed and gave him an answer that he’ll remember for quite a while.”

“Wow you really have changed!” Pat chimed in. “The Mandy we knew, before you got thrown off that balcony, would never have done that to someone.”(Oh shit screwed up again!) “I can’t tell you how proud of you we are!” They both clamored. The two of them grabbed me in a big group hug.

“We’re so happy to have you back” Pat said with a tear in her eye.

“Yeah.” Kim said in agreement. “And it looks like getting thrown off a balcony was all it took to finally get you to stand up for yourself. Hell if we knew that’s all it would have taken, we would have done it to you years ago.” We all broke down laughing.

We continued trying on outfit after outfit. It seemed to go on forever. We must have tried on a hundred different things between us. I was amazed at how much fun it was. (I know! I know! But it’s the estrogen! What can I say except when in Rome…)

When we had exhausted all we had to try on we grabbed the (comparatively) small amount of things we were actually going to buy and headed off to the shoe department. Let me just say this from the get go, (as a guy) I have never understood why women need to have six different pairs of the exact same shoe. (Also let me add, that after spending the better part of two hours looking at shoes with these two, I still have no idea.) But I digress. So where was I …..?AH yes…. shoes!

So there we were at the shoe department. Following Kim and Pat’s lead, I started meandering around looking at the different styles trying to find something that would match all the clothes I had bought. (Big mistake!!!) I tried to stay away from anything with a significant heel on it. (Big mistake part deux!)

After wondering aimlessly for a bit, not really paying attention to anything, I got the feeling I was being watched. I took a casual look around and there were the Bobsey twins staring at me with these foolish grins. “What?” I asked.

“What are you doing?” Kim asked.

“Looking for shoes.” I replied “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“Well it looks like you’re looking for shoes alright.” Kim replied. “But tell me, how are you gonna find a couple nice pairs of pumps in the men’s department?” I looked around me as they laughed. Sure enough I had wondered into the men’s shoe department. (At least that explains why the shoes looked so comfortable all of a sudden.) The two of them came over (after they stopped cackling) and dragged me back to the right section.

So there I was back in the women’s section and still with no idea what to get. Seeing my distress Kim offered “How about these?” She held a pair of black shoes with what looked like a 3” heel and had that strappy stuff that kinda goes up your ankle a bit.

“Oh those are great!” Pat added. “They’ll look great with that leather skirt you bought Mandy.”

I looked at the shoes dubiously, thinking only of how many different bones I could break wearing them. “Ah… I don’t know…” I started.
“Oh you wuss! Just try them on!” Kim interrupted impatiently.

The sales girl, hearing the exchange, came over. “Would you like to try those on?” She asked. “What size do you need?”

I shrugged. “I don’t really know.” I said dejectedly. She grabbed the foot measuring thing-a-mo-bob and got my size and headed off to the back room to find the correct pair. When she got back, Pat had a pair of boots stuck halfway up my nose. She was going on about how they would match this and that. So as I tried on the strappy shoes, she sent the sales girl back for those too.

After struggling for a bit trying to figure out how the straps worked exactly, I succeeded in getting them on. I stood up and the first thing that came to mind was “OW!! These friggen things hurt!”

I passed this thought on to Kim, who replied “Well Duh! There supposed to look good not feel good! (Oh! Of course! How silly of me to want my feet to be comfortable!) So try them out. Walk around a bit.”

With dread building in the pit of my stomach, I took a step. Then another. “Hmm so far so good” I thought and then promptly fell right on my ass.

Kim and Pat bolted over to me. “Are you Okay?” one of them asked.

A quick bolt of pain shot up my back as I struggled to my feet, but it didn’t last. “Yeah, I think so.” I answered. I could tell they were concerned but were also trying hard not to laugh. The expression on their faces was hysterical. I started laughing at them and of course they laughed right back at me.

After we recovered and assured the petrified sales girl I was fine, they got me back up and we started over. This time Pat and Kim stayed with me catching me when I lost balance. We did about ten laps around they department before I was confident enough to try one on my own again. This time I made it. (Yey for me!)

With that achieved, I moved on to the boots and so on and so on. We must have sent that poor sales girl back and forth fifty times but she never complained. When we were done I was the proud owner of six new pairs of shoes and ten new outfits. (I won’t tell you how much it came out to but let’s just say I could get used to this life style.)

We were finished paying for everything, so I figured we were done. After three hours in one store I was definitely all set with shopping. Pat and Kim on the other hand were just getting warmed up. I told them I was tired.

“What do you mean you’re tired?” Pat asked in a tone that suggested that I had just told her that flying saucers had just blown up the Hancock tower.
“I mean I’m tired.” I replied. “I’ve only been out of the house to go to physical therapy and my stamina isn’t what it used to be.” I thought it was a sensible argument.

“But like there’s still a whole mall to look through.” Pat complained.

“Pat!” Kim chastised “If she's tired, we’ll take her home. I mean the girl was seriously injured and isn’t fully recovered yet. How can you be upset with her for that?”

“I’m sorry Mandy. I just got carried away. Do you forgive me?” she asked looking genuinely embarrassed.

“Don’t worry about it.” I said. With that we headed for the car.

Once we got back to Mandy’s parents house (I still can’t quite get myself to call it home all the time.) Rita was all over me. Asking how the day went, where we went, wanting to see everything I had bought. I blew her off while I said goodbye to Pat and Kim. We made arrangements to get together next weekend and then they drove off. I’ll have to admit, I really couldn’t stand either of them when the day began, but we had a lot of fun. (Who’d a ever thought I’d ever have a good time with those two? Certainly not me. I guess I have changed some.)

Notes:

I would like to give a special thank you to Wendy for her help with shopping scene. I couldn’t have done it without her help.

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